1. ARNOLD!
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2. HEY, ARNOLD!
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3. HEY, ARNOLD!
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4. ARNOLD!
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5. ARNOLD!
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6. ARNOLD!
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7. [Captioning sponsored by
THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
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8. and NICKELODEON]
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9. AR-NOLD!
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10. MOVE IT,
FOOTBALL HEAD!
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11. HEY, ARNOLD!
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12. HEY!
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13. WHO'S DOING THAT?
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14. CUT IT OUT.
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15. WHAT?
WHAT?
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16. ARNOLD, WHAT A BOOB!
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17. AND YET...
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18. AH! WHAT A DREAMBOAT.
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19. YOUR EYES
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20. LIKE TWO GREEN JELLY BEANS
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21. ARE POOLS I WANT TO BATHE IN.
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22. IN THE CLASSROOM
MY HEART DOTH SWOON
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23. AND YET, I WANT
TO BEAT YOUR FACE IN.
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24. MOVE IT, MOVE IT!
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25. WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT,
GEEK BAIT?
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26. SUDDENLY I FEEL... INSPIRED.
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27. I CLOSE THIS TOME
WITH MY SIGNATURE, BELOVED.
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28. "'H' IS FOR THE HEAD
I'D LIKE TO PUNT.
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29. "'E' IS FOR EVERY TIME I SEE
THE LITTLE RUNT.
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30. "'L' IS LONGING
FOR OUR FIRSTEST KISS.
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31. "'G' IF FOR HOW GOOD
THAT LONGING IS.
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32. AND 'A' IS FOR ARNOLD,
OF COURSE."
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33. DUH!
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34. ONE SIDE, MORON.
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35. HEY, WHAT'S THIS
LITTLE PINK BOOK?
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36. IT ISN'T YOURS?
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37. PLEASE.
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38. WHAT'S SO FUNNY?
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39. WHO WROTE THIS STUFF?
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40. WHAT IS IT?
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41. "TO ARNOLD
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42. WITH THE RED HOT LIPS."
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43. HUH?
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44. "YOUR FOOTBALL HEAD,
YOUR AWESOME FACE
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45. "YOUR GRUNGY CHIC,
YOUR CAT-LIKE GRACE
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46. "WHOSE RED HOT LIPS
DO I WANT TO TASTE?
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47. "THREE GUESSES,
STUPID.
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48. ARNOLD, ARNOLD, ARNOLD!"
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49. LOOK... IT MUST HAVE BEEN
SOME OTHER ARNOLD.
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50. I DON'T KNOW.
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51. IT FITS
YOUR DESCRIPTION
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52. PRETTY WELL,
"HOT LIPS."
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53. GRANDPA!
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54. SORRY, BOY,
COULDN'T RESIST.
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55. GIVE ME THAT!
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56. HEY!
LET ME READ ONE.
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57. SO LONG, ROMEO.
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58. OH, MY!
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59. HEY!
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60. LISTEN
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61. "LET ME COUNT THY HAIRS..."
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62. SHUT UP!
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63. WHY, WHY DID I SIGN MY NAME?
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64. I WAS TOO BOLD.
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65. THOSE POEMS
WEREN'T MEANT
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66. TO BE SEEN
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67. UNTIL I'M DEAD AND BURIED
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68. AND WORMS HAVE CONSUMED
MY FLESH.
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69. ARNOLD MUST NEVER SEE
THAT LAST PAGE.
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70. I'LL STEAL
INSIDE HIS ROOM SOMEHOW.
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71. THERE ARE WAYS TO FIND OUT
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72. WHO WROTE THOSE POEMS, GERALD.
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73. YOU JUST HAVE
TO BE SCIENTIFIC.
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74. DON'T TOUCH THAT.
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75. IT'S EVIDENCE.
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76. NOTE THE BITE MARKS
ON THE PENCIL.
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77. THE STRANDS OF HAIR.
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78. BUT FIRST, WE MAKE
THE LIST OF SUSPECTS.
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79. OKAY.
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80. WHO WAS THERE
AT THE BUS STOP?
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81. LET'S SEE.
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82. JENNIFER WAS THERE.
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83. THE ONE WHO ALWAYS CHEWS
WITH HER MOUTH OPEN?
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84. UGH!
NO WAY.
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85. DODIE?
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86. NOT.
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87. SOME OLDER GIRLS
WERE THERE.
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88. WAIT A MINUTE...
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89. RUTH MCDOUGAL WAS THERE.
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90. RUTH!
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91. ARNOLD!
SHE'S IN THE SIXTH GRADE.
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92. IT COULD HAPPEN.
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93. DREAM ON!
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94. THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY
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95. COLLECT EVIDENCE
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96. FROM EVERY GIRL
ON THAT LIST.
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97. THAT'LL TAKE ALL DAY.
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98. NOT WITH ABNER.
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99. A PIG?
WHAT'S HE GOING TO DO?
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100. HERE, BOY...
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101. SMELL THIS.
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102. WOW!
LOOK AT HIM GO!
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103. HEY, ABNER, WAIT UP!
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104. WAIT UP!
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105. AH!
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106. AHA!
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107. OW!
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108. I'M...
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109. I'M IN HIS ROOM.
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110. A PLACE I'VE OFTEN VISITED
IN MY DREAMS.
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111. THE TEMPLE
OF YOUR SOUL, MY LOVE.
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112. OH, MY GOSH!
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113. WHAT IS THAT SHAMPOO?
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114. GO ON, ABNER.
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115. GO DOWNSTAIRS.
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116. I DON'T KNOW.
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117. HE'S USUALLY
PRETTY GOOD AT THIS.
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118. ABNER MAY BE
A GOOD TRUFFLE ANIMAL
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119. BUT HE'S A LOUSY DETECTIVE.
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120. I'LL SAY.
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121. HEY!
WAIT A MINUTE.
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122. SOMETHING'S WRONG HERE.
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123. SOMETHING'S... MISSING.
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124. I KNOW.
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125. THAT'S BETTER.
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126. LET'S GET DOWN
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127. TO THE EVIDENCE.
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128. A DRINKING GLASS
OF JENNIFER'S.
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129. CHECK.
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130. DODIE'S RETAINER.
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131. CHECK.
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132. RUTH MCDOUGAL'S
HAIR RIBBON.
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133. FINGERPRINTS.
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134. YEP...
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135. THEY'RE HUMAN.
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136. HMM... NEGATIVE.
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137. HMM...
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138. HMM.
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139. NEGATIVE.
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140. ALL RIGHT,
LET'S HAVE RUTH'S RIBBON.
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141. IS IT RUTH'S HAIR,
IS IT, HUH?
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142. UH-UH, UH-UH.
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143. GERALD, WHEN THESE
RESULTS COME OUT
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144. WILL WE KNOW
WHO WROTE THE POEMS?
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145. NO!
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146. I WAS JUST MAKING
HOT CHOCOLATE.
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147. OKAY, BASED ON OUR RESEARCH
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148. WE CAN SAFELY DEDUCE
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149. THAT OUR SUSPECT IS FEMALE
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150. LIVES IN THE TRI-CITY AREA
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151. AND IS SOMEWHERE
BETWEEN THE AGES
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152. OF EIGHT... AND 87.
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153. OOH, WE'RE DOING GOOD.
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154. OKAY,
LET'S NARROW THE FIELD.
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155. THIS YEARBOOK HAS THE AUTOGRAPH
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156. OF EVERY KID AT P.S. 118.
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157. WE'LL COMPARE HANDWRITING
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158. ON EACH SUSPECT
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159. ON THE LIST.
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160. OH, NO.
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161. LET'S START
WITH RUTH MCDOUGAL.
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162. ARNOLD,
FACE IT, MAN.
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163. IT'S NOT RUTH.
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164. IT NEVER WAS RUTH.
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165. IT'S NEVER GOING
TO BE RUTH.
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166. OKAY?
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167. OR MAYBE SHE CHANGED
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168. HER HANDWRITING
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169. BECAUSE SHE WAS TOO SHY
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170. TO LET ME KNOW
HOW MUCH SHE REALLY CARES.
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171. ALL RIGHT, GO.
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172. ABIGAIL V. AARNSTAEDT.
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173. NOPE, DEFINITELY NOT.
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174. JENNIFER BARNES.
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175. AMY OBLEMEYER.
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176. HEY, ARNOLD?
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177. I GIVE UP.
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178. THE NEXT NAME ON THIS LIST
IS HELGA PATAKI.
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179. HELGA.
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180. YOU HEAR SOMETHING?
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181. MUST BE COYOTES.
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182. LET'S FACE IT, ARNOLD,
WE'RE STUMPED.
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183. WE AREN'T ANY CLOSER
TO FIGURING THIS OUT
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184. AND WE'VE WORKED
ALL NIGHT.
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185. LET'S TAKE A BREAK.
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186. YES, YES!
TAKE A BREAK.
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187. LET'S GO DOWN
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188. TO SLAUSEN'S
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189. FOR AN ICE CREAM CONE.
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190. YEAH, I COULD GO
FOR SOME ICE CREAM.
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191. YES, ICE CREAM, GOOD PLAN.
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192. BUT THEN AGAIN...
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193. AW, COME ON.
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194. WELL...
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195. GO, GO!
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196. WHAT WAS THAT?
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197. I MUST STOP TALKING TO MYSELF.
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198. YOU SURE YOU DON'T
HEAR SOMETHING?
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199. LOOK,
WE'RE BOTH TIRED.
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200. I'M JUST GOING TO GO
STRAIGHT TO BED.
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201. OKAY.
SEE YOU TOMORROW, ARNOLD.
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202. SEE YOU.
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203. GRUBWORM?
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204. THIS IS MIGHTY FALCON.
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205. MIGHTY FALCON.
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206. PHOEBE, IT'S ME, HELGA.
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207. LISTEN, CALL MY MOM
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208. AND TELL HER
I'M SLEEPING OVER WITH YOU.
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209. JUST DO IT!
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210. GOOD NIGHT, SWEET PRINCE.
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211. MORNING, SHORT MAN.
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212. EVER FIND OUT WHO
YOUR SECRET ADMIRER IS?
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213. NAH.
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214. WHOEVER IT IS
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215. I WISH THEY'D GO JUMP UP A ROPE.
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216. WHY, I REMEMBER
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217. WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE,
I DID...
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218. WELL, NO, I DON'T ACTUALLY
REMEMBER, BUT STILL...
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219. YOU'RE PRETTY DARN LUCKY
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220. TO HAVE SOMEONE WHO CARES
ABOUT YOU SO MUCH.
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221. YOU KNOW,
IT IS KIND OF COOL.
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222. OBSESSIVE,
BUT COOL.
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223. SEE YOU LATER, GRANDPA.
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224. BOOK'S GONE STRAIGHT
TO THE KID'S HEAD.
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225. "THE LITTLE TWERP
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226. "WHO SETS MY SOUL AFLAME
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227. "PUT THEM ALL TOGETHER
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228. THEY SPELL "ARNOLD."
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229. THAT WAS UNBELIEVABLE.
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230. HEY, HELGA
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231. WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
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232. YOU SLEEP IN A CLOSET
OR SOMETHING?
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233. OH, MAN, ARNOLD
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234. THAT IS THE CORNIEST
POEM YET.
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235. WHOEVER WROTE THEM
IS PATHETIC.
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236. READ ANOTHER ONE.
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237. OKAY.
BUT IT'S THE LAST PAGE.
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238. "'H' IS FOR THE HEAD
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239. "I'D LIKE TO PUNT.
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240. "'E' IS FOR EVERY TIME
I SEE THE LITTLE RUNT.
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241. "'L' IS..."
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242. WHY DID YOU
DO THAT?
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243. FIRST SPITBALL OF THE DAY,
FOOTBALL HEAD.
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244. YES!
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245. WHAT IS IT WITH HER?
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246. PLEASE, HELP ME,
HELP ME, HELP!
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247. NOTHING LIKE A FIELD TRIP,
HUH, ARNOLD?
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248. HUH? WHAT? OH.
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249. ARE WE AT THE AQUARIUM, YET?
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250. NOT YET.
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251. BUT WE BETTER
GET THERE SOON.
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252. EVERYONE'S RESTLESS.
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253. I'LL SAY.
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254. HERE WE GO.
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255. LOOK, I'M A WHALE.
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256. WHAT DO YOU MEAN
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257. YOU NEVER BEEN
TO THE AQUARIUM?
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258. LAST TIME WE HAD
A FIELD TRIP THERE
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259. WE WERE IN
FIRST GRADE.
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260. AND I HAD
CHICKEN POX.
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261. IT WAS GREAT, MAN.
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262. THEY HAD THIS TIDE POOL THING.
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263. FULL OF GROSS BAT RAYS
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264. YOU CAN TOUCH.
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265. IT WAS REALLY SLIMY
AND DISGUSTING.
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266. I WENT BACK NINE TIMES.
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267. THEY GOT A PENGUIN NAMED STUART
WHO EATS HIS OWN BARF.
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268. AND SLIMO THE SEA SNAIL
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269. WHO CAN DRAW A REPLICA OF THE
MONA LISA WITH HIS MUCUS TRAIL.
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270. I CAN DO THAT, TOO.
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271. SEE?
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272. DWEEB.
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273. AND THEY GOT LOCK JAW.
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274. YEAH, LOCK JAW.
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275. LOCK JAW?
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276. WHO'S LOCK JAW?
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277. YEAH! YEAH! ALL RIGHT!
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278. YAY! WHEE!
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279. WOW!
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280. WELCOME TO THE CITY AQUARIUM.
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281. WE HAVE A FEW SIMPLE
RULES TO FOLLOW.
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282. NO FEEDING THE FISH.
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283. NO TAPPING ON THE GLASS.
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284. NO DIVING IN THE SHARK TANK.
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285. NO VIDEO CAMERAS,
NO PHOTOGRAPHY.
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286. NO SUSHI CHEFS!
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287. NO SMOKING, NO...
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288. SO, WHO'S LOCK JAW?
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289. YOU KIDDING ME?
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290. HE'S ONLY THE SCARIEST SEA
MONSTER IN THE OCEAN DEEP.
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291. IF THERE WAS A BATTLE—
HIM AND A GIANT SQUID?
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292. LOCK JAW WOULD WIN.
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293. I HEARD HE COULD RAM A BOAT
AND SINK IT.
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294. I HEARD HE COULD
SWALLOW A KID WHOLE
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295. AND SPIT OUT THE BONES.
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296. LOCK JAW, HUH?
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297. COOL.
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298. NO GUNS, NO KNIVES,
NO EXPLOSIVES
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299. AND MOST OF ALL
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300. NO SKATEBOARDS!
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301. HEY, IS THAT
LOCK JAW?
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302. YEAH, RIGHT.
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303. WHICH ONE'S
LOCK JAW?
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304. YOU KIDDING?
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305. LOCK JAW COULD SUCK THEM UP
LIKE VERMICELLI.
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306. HEY, ARNOLD!
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307. GOING TO GO SEE
LOCK JAW— COME ON!
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308. Man's voice:
And now, presenting
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309. the Terror of the Deep
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310. the ancient reptile
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311. whose ancestors date back
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312. over 150 million years
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313. the Mighty Lock Jaw!
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314. THAT'S LOCK JAW?
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315. BIG DEAL.
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316. HE SEEMED
A LOT BIGGER
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317. WHEN WE WERE
IN FIRST GRADE.
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318. HE'S NOT SO SCARY.
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319. WHAT A RIP.
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320. YES, I GOT HIM— YES!
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321. THAT TURTLE
REALLY BITES.
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322. LOCK JAW?
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323. HEY, LOCK JAW?
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324. HEY, MAN.
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325. BYE, ARNOLD. BYE.
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326. SORRY THAT
TURTLE BITES.
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327. I GOT HIM, YES!
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328. EXCUSE ME, SIR,
WE'RE SELLING
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329. CHOCOLATE TURTLES
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330. TO RAISE MONEY
FOR OUR TROOP TRIP
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331. TO SCOTLAND.
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332. HMM, NO THANKS.
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333. HI, GRANDPA.
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334. HEY THERE, SHORT MAN.
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335. HOW DO YOU LIKE
MY NEW TURTLENECK?
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336. UH, IT'S NICE, GRANDPA.
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337. NOW, IF I COULD FIND
MY TORTOISE SHELL GLASSES.
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338. I'D REALLY BE
LOOKING SNAZZY.
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339. WHO IS IT?
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340. IT'S ME, MON CAPITAN.
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341. I BROUGHT YOU A SANDWICH.
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342. I'M REALLY NOT HUNGRY, GRANDMA.
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343. WELL, WHAT'S THE MATTER?
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344. I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU THIS DOWN
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345. SINCE VON KLUCK SWEPT THROUGH
BELGIUM BACK IN AUGUST '14.
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346. I DON'T KNOW, GRANDMA.
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347. IT'S JUST...
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348. GRANDMA, HOW
WOULD YOU FEEL
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349. IF YOU LIVED IN THE OCEAN
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350. AND A SCIENTIST CAPTURED YOU
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351. AND PUT YOU IN A TANK?
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352. WHAT? NO SIR.
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353. THEY'LL NEVER
CATCH ME!
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354. IT'S A HYPOTHETICAL QUESTION.
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355. OH. WELL, WHY
DIDN'T YOU SAY SO?
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356. SEE, WE WENT TO
THE AQUARIUM TODAY.
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357. OH, THE BIG HOUSE FOR FISH.
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358. THERE'S THIS
REALLY OLD TURTLE.
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359. OLD, EH?
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360. AND HIS SHELL IS
COVERED WITH GRAFFITI
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361. HIS WATER IS DIRTY
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362. KIDS THROW STUFF AT HIM.
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363. AND HE'S OLD?
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364. WELL, YEAH.
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365. AND SAD AND DIRTY.
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366. AND HIS TANK
IS TOO SMALL.
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367. AND HE'S OLD.
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368. YEAH, AND HE'S...
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369. THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!
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370. AND THEN HE'S...
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371. TREATING A WISE OLD CREATURE
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372. LIKE SOME COMMON CRIMINAL.
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373. I THINK THEY...
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374. THERE'S NOT A MOMENT TO LOSE.
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375. BUT...
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376. I SAID, COME ON.
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377. WE HAVE A MISSION
TO COMPLETE.
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378. I KNOW IT'S
IN HERE SOMEWHERE.
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379. GRANDMA...
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380. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
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381. WE'RE TAKING ACTION.
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382. RIGHTING A WRONG!
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383. GRASPING AT STRAWS!
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384. AHA!
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385. PERFECT.
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386. FROM NOW ON
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387. CALL ME "CHIEF"
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388. AND YOU'RE "AGENT NINE."
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389. TAKE THIS, NUMBER NINE.
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390. IT'S OUR GEAR.
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391. GRANDMA, DO YOU HAVE
A DRIVER'S LICENSE?
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392. GRANDMA, WE'RE
TRESPASSING.
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393. THIS IS PUBLIC
PROPERTY.
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394. WE'RE THE PUBLIC,
AREN'T WE?
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395. GOOD, THE SENTRY'S
NOT AT HIS POST.
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396. NOW'S OUR CHANCE,
COME ON.
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397. YOU LEAD, NUMBER NINE.
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398. YOU KNOW WHERE THE
PRISONER'S CELL IS.
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399. HERE, HAVE A COOKIE.
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400. OH, YOU TOSSED YOUR COOKIES.
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401. HAVE A COOKIE.
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402. YOU TOSSED YOUR
COOKIES AGAIN.
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403. OH, OH, MY GOODNESS.
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404. THIS IS WORSE THAN I THOUGHT.
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405. SEE, I TOLD YOU.
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406. WELL, I KNOW ONE THING
THAT WILL CHEER HIM UP.
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407. I THINK HE'S
STARTING TO TRUST US.
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408. THEN WE CAN
GET HIM OUT OF HERE.
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409. BUT ISN'T THAT
AGAINST THE LAW?
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410. AGAINST THE LAW
OF THE KING, PERHAPS.
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411. BUT AGAINST THE LAW
OF COMMON DECENCY?
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412. I THINK NOT.
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413. DON'T WORRY, BUDDY, WE'RE
BUSTING YOU OUT OF HERE.
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414. NOW YOU'RE GETTING
THE HANG OF IT.
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415. DON'T GET
TOO CLOSE
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416. TO HIS MOUTH.
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417. GRANDMA!
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418. THESE DARN SLEEVES ARE TOO LONG.
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419. Lock Jaw is a rare, endangered
Galapagos Tortoise.
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420. He weighs well over 400 pounds.
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421. WAIT HERE, GRANDMA,
I GOT AN IDEA.
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422. LET'S GO, BIG SHARK.
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423. COME ON, JAWS—
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424. BITE ME.
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425. OH!
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426. PUNCH IT, GRANDMA.
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427. DO YOU THINK HE KNOWS
THE WAY TO THE OCEAN?
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428. WHY, SURE,
IT'S INSTINCT.
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429. RUN!
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430. BE FREE!
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431. GO, LIVE AND LOVE AGAIN!
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432. HEY, GRANDMA?
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433. YES, NUMBER NINE?
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434. YOU'RE THE BEST.
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435. SO ARE YOU, ARNOLD.
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436. NOW, COME ON.
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437. ALL THIS EXERCISE
GIVES ME A HANKERING
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438. FOR SOME TURTLE SOUP.
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439. [Captioning sponsored by
THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
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440. and NICKELODEON
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441. Captioned by
The Caption Center
WGBH Education Foundation]
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