1. Once upon a time, there
was a glowing city protected by golden gatesCopy !req
2. known as Heaven.Copy !req
3. It was ruled by beings
of pure light.Copy !req
4. Angels that worshipped
good and shielded all from evil.Copy !req
5. Lucifer was one
of these angels.Copy !req
6. He was a dreamer with
fantastical ideas for all of creation.Copy !req
7. But he was seen as
a troublemaker by the elders of Heaven.Copy !req
8. For they felt his way of thinking
was dangerous to the order of their world.Copy !req
9. So he watched as the angels
began to expand the universe in their ways.Copy !req
10. From the dust of Earth,
they created Adam and Lilith.Copy !req
11. Equals as the first of mankind,
but despite this,Copy !req
12. Adam demanded control and
Lilith refused to submit to his will.Copy !req
13. She fled the garden.Copy !req
14. Drawn in by her fierce
independence,Copy !req
15. Lucifer found her and the two
rebellious dreamers fell deeply in love.Copy !req
16. Together, they wished to share
the magic of free will with humanity,Copy !req
17. offering the fruit of knowledge to
Adam's new bride, Eve, who gladly accepted.Copy !req
18. But this gift came with a
curse.Copy !req
19. For with this single act of disobedience,
evil finally found its way into Earth.Copy !req
20. With it, a new realm of
darkness and sin.Copy !req
21. And the order Heaven had
worked to maintain was shattered.Copy !req
22. As punishment for their
reckless act,Copy !req
23. Heaven cast Lucifer and
his love into the dark pit he had created,Copy !req
24. never allowing him to see the
good that came from humanity,Copy !req
25. only the cruel and the wicked.Copy !req
26. Ashamed, Lucifer lost
his will to dream.Copy !req
27. But Lilith thrived,
empowering demon-kind with her voiceCopy !req
28. and her songs. And as the numbers of Hell grew,Copy !req
29. so did its power.Copy !req
30. Threatened by this,
Heaven made a truly heartless decision.Copy !req
31. That every year,
they would send down an army,Copy !req
32. an extermination to ensure Hell and
its sinners could never rise against them.Copy !req
33. But Lilith's hope remained.Copy !req
34. And her dream was passed down
to their precious daughterCopy !req
35. the Princess of Hell.Copy !req
36. Don't worry, Mom.
I'll make you proud.Copy !req
37. Charlie?Copy !req
38. Augh! Oh, shit. Did you hear
all that?Copy !req
39. Uh... Yeah, I was right there.Copy !req
40. Sorry. I get pretty worked up
after an extermination happens.Copy !req
41. This story helps.Copy !req
42. I know. Don't worry.
I enjoy your theatrics.Copy !req
43. Are you okay?Copy !req
44. I'm fine, just... thinking
ya know, family stuff.Copy !req
45. Did you hear
from your mom yet?Copy !req
46. Oof. How long has it been now?Copy !req
47. Not that long, only... seven...
years...Copy !req
48. Off doing something
important, I'm sure.Copy !req
49. But this kingdom was something
she really cared about.Copy !req
50. Something I care about.Copy !req
51. Well, at least you aren't alone.Copy !req
52. I just hope what
I'm trying to do here will work.Copy !req
53. It will. I have faith in you.Copy !req
54. All right. Come on.Copy !req
55. Alastor says he has
something to show us.Copy !req
56. Well, hello there you wayward sinner.Copy !req
57. Do you like blood,
violence and depravity of a sexual nature?Copy !req
58. Of course you do.
That's why you're in Hell!Copy !req
59. But what would you sayCopy !req
60. there was a place to stay that
had none of that?Copy !req
61. Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel,Copy !req
62. a misguided path to redemption!Copy !req
63. Founded five days ago by
Lucifer's delusional daughterCopy !req
64. Charlotte Morningstar!Copy !req
65. Come place your
fate in her inexperienced handsCopy !req
66. as she tries to work through
her daddy issues by fixing you!Copy !req
67. Here, we offer fun things!Copy !req
68. Such as somewhat
functional staff!Copy !req
69. And 24 hour Pest Control!Copy !req
70. Custom rooms,
and just look at this tacky parlor!Copy !req
71. Enjoy riveting conversation
with our singular resident.Copy !req
72. Wow! All this and more at the
Hazbin Hotel!Copy !req
73. Your last desperate
attempt at salvation starts here.Copy !req
74. So, what'd ya' think?Copy !req
75. I'm sorry, what the
fuck was that?Copy !req
76. Uh, yeah, one note...Copy !req
77. Alastor, I mean...Copy !req
78. First off, thank you so much
for making this seriously amazing,Copy !req
79. but um... maybe the tone is a
bit...Copy !req
80. off?Copy !req
81. We want people to want to come
here,Copy !req
82. this makes it look...
ummm...Copy !req
83. Bad. The word
you're looking for is bad.Copy !req
84. Funny. I was going
for hilarious!Copy !req
85. It didn't explain anything
about how we're trying to saveCopy !req
86. demons from extermination,
which is the whole fucking point.Copy !req
87. Vaggie is right, Alastor.Copy !req
88. The commercial was to let
Sinners know we are trying to help them.Copy !req
89. Well, my dear, I haven't
been active in Hell for some time,Copy !req
90. and everyone remembers me
from my radio show!Copy !req
91. The proper medium to
express oneself!Copy !req
92. But you insisted on this: noisy
picture box advertisement,Copy !req
93. So I had a little fun with it.Copy !req
94. Oh, fun. You had a little fun
with it?Copy !req
95. Well, this is not what we want
to represent us.Copy !req
96. When you showed up here a week
ago, you told usCopy !req
97. you would help
run this hotel!Copy !req
98. Instead, you're mocking us.Copy !req
99. Nobody's going to want to
come to a placeCopy !req
100. that a powerful Overlord like
you thinks is a waste of time!Copy !req
101. What?Copy !req
102. If'n ya filmin' a
commercial,Copy !req
103. can I suggest you take
better advantageCopy !req
104. of the talented
celebrity you have right here?Copy !req
105. - Angel, you're a porn star.
- A famous porn star.Copy !req
106. I'll have the horniest sinners
knockin' these walls down to get in.Copy !req
107. We are not filming a
porn as a commercial.Copy !req
108. Why not?
Sex sells, don't it?Copy !req
109. I swear if you film me goin' at
it with mister fancy talk-creepy voice here,Copy !req
110. you'd be rollin' in participants
willin' to stay at this tacky hotel.Copy !req
111. Haha! Never going to happen!Copy !req
112. Angel, I appreciate
you wanting to use your special skillsCopy !req
113. to, um, attract folks to
the hotel,Copy !req
114. but... I really don't want
to exploit you, in that way!Copy !req
115. Oh, please, baby.Copy !req
116. This body was made
to be exploited.Copy !req
117. I got the arms,
I got the stamina, I got the legs.Copy !req
118. I got the lung capacity...
Oh-oh I got the legs,Copy !req
119. the gag reflex, the holes...Copy !req
120. the chest fluff everyone thinks are titsCopy !req
121. Uhhh, hold that
thought. I'll be right back!Copy !req
122. I could keep goin'
all night, baby.Copy !req
123. Hello? Dad?Copy !req
124. Hey, I have a question.Copy !req
125. If freaky face over there
is so powerful,Copy !req
126. then why can't
he just make people stay here?Copy !req
127. Oh, trust me,
I can!Copy !req
128. Why do you think I'm here?Copy !req
129. You actually think I'd be cleaning bottlesCopy !req
130. and listening to you fuck's bitch and
moan all the time if he wasn't forcin' me?Copy !req
131. - I like being forced.
- Keep that to yourself, Niff.Copy !req
132. What, you don't love being
here with me, Whiskers?Copy !req
133. Call me "Whiskers" again and
I'll jam that bottle down your throat.Copy !req
134. Kinky. C'mon keep talkin' dirty.Copy !req
135. Ugh, Angel, let Husk do his job.
And no, we can't force sinners to stay here.Copy !req
136. They need to choose to.Copy !req
137. I'm choosing to be here,
and I think it's all stupid.Copy !req
138. We're in Hell, Toots.Copy !req
139. That's kind of the end of the
road, ain't it?Copy !req
140. Well, maybe it doesn't
have to be.Copy !req
141. Just because nobody has made it
out beforeCopy !req
142. doesn't mean it's
not possible.Copy !req
143. Hey, whatever means I can keep
crashin' here rent free.Copy !req
144. Crack is expensive.Copy !req
145. Yeah, I can totally.Copy !req
146. Yeah, I'll head over there
right away...Copy !req
147. Okay.Copy !req
148. Hah! YES! YES!! Hahahaha!!Copy !req
149. - Vaggie! Holy shit!
- Ahh! What?!Copy !req
150. Get over here!Copy !req
151. What's going on?Copy !req
152. My dad
just called. He said that the leaderCopy !req
153. of the Angel Army
wants to meet.Copy !req
154. - He asked if I could go instead.
- But...Copy !req
155. But... But the extermination
just happened.Copy !req
156. What could they want this soon after...Copy !req
157. I can do this.
Somehow, I know itCopy !req
158. I'll get Heaven
behind my planCopy !req
159. - Charlie, hold on.
- There's just no way I could blow itCopy !req
160. - Not this once in a lifetime chance
- It's just a meeting.Copy !req
161. To change their minds
And touch their heartsCopy !req
162. Or whatever angels haveCopy !req
163. This could be bad.Copy !req
164. Cheer up, VaggieCopy !req
165. This could be swellCopy !req
166. Something tells me that today
Will be a happy dayCopy !req
167. In HellCopy !req
168. Okay, but just
don't... sing to them.Copy !req
169. That bitch is
halfway down the street.Copy !req
170. - Is she...
- Oh, she's dancin'.Copy !req
171. Ugh, no.Copy !req
172. There's a warm fuzzy feelingCopy !req
173. That wafts through the airCopy !req
174. Every street so revealing
It's hard not to stareCopy !req
175. It's a realm so appealing
It beats anywhereCopy !req
176. If you don't mind
The smellCopy !req
177. It's a happy day in HellCopy !req
178. - Hi mister.
- Go fuck yourself.Copy !req
179. There's an endless trash fireCopy !req
180. That's burning my soulCopy !req
181. Got a ton of barbed
wire To shove in his holeCopy !req
182. Uh, excuse me -
Doing what is requiredCopy !req
183. We all have our roleCopy !req
184. I'm not doing wellCopy !req
185. Another shitty day in HellCopy !req
186. If I can show
Them the dream I've dreamedCopy !req
187. That any soul can changeCopy !req
188. Those angels
minds Are hard to changeCopy !req
189. Then they will know Everyone can
be redeemed From the evil to the strangeCopy !req
190. They're bloodthirsty and
derangedCopy !req
191. I can hear all their stories
The lost and displacedCopy !req
192. And I know
that They're more of an acquired tasteCopy !req
193. But if I open the door
And I give them a placeCopy !req
194. At my Hazbin HotelCopy !req
195. It'll be a happy
day in HellCopy !req
196. From the porn studio
Where the Cinephiles goCopy !req
197. To watch award winning
Demon bukkake showsCopy !req
198. To the cannibal town Where
they don't wear a frown 'causeCopy !req
199. Holy shit
Ew, my gosh, whyCopy !req
200. And I don't give a crow that
His brains got in my eyeCopy !req
201. Cause know I can spare them
From Heaven's genocideCopy !req
202. - I can do this
- There's an endless trash fireCopy !req
203. - I just know it
- That's burning my soulCopy !req
204. - I'll get Heaven behind my plans
- AhCopy !req
205. There's just no way I
could blow itCopy !req
206. I kinda like
the barbed wire That's shoved in my holeCopy !req
207. Not this once in a
lifetime chanceCopy !req
208. To change their mindsCopy !req
209. And touch my partsCopy !req
210. Oh... No, thank you.
I'm just gonna...Copy !req
211. Fulfill my destinyCopy !req
212. Your loss bitch!Copy !req
213. I can already tellCopy !req
214. Today
is gonna be a Fucking happy dayCopy !req
215. In HellCopy !req
216. Hello!Copy !req
217. Hello?Copy !req
218. Hello?Copy !req
219. Creepy...Copy !req
220. Oh, Okay. Also creepy.Copy !req
221. Uhh, hello?Copy !req
222. Is anyone here?Copy !req
223. - 'Sup.
- Holy Shit!Copy !req
224. Hi, I'm Charlie. My dad
asked me if I could meet you.Copy !req
225. - Yeah, I know.
- Okay, well, it's nice to meet you.Copy !req
226. Totally. Nice to meet you, too.Copy !req
227. Ohh!Copy !req
228. Ha! I fucking got you.
Did you fuckin' see that?Copy !req
229. - Good shit.
- Uh, so wait, you aren't here?Copy !req
230. No, you think I'd come
down there?Copy !req
231. No. I mean, I love the vibe,
totally, I love your tunes.Copy !req
232. Pretty fuckin' hardcore,
don't get me wrong.Copy !req
233. But, it's such a bummer,
man.Copy !req
234. Everything down there's
just so "eugh" ya know?Copy !req
235. Ew.Copy !req
236. Right. So I'm happy
we got this opportunity to meet.Copy !req
237. There's a project I've been working
on that I really want to talk to you about...Copy !req
238. Hey, hey, hey, slow down. We
got time.Copy !req
239. How about we get to know
each other a little, mm?Copy !req
240. How about some lunch?
You hungry?Copy !req
241. I got you!Copy !req
242. Here's my personal favourite.
You'll love it.Copy !req
243. Uh, thanks!Copy !req
244. I got you again, bitch!Copy !req
245. Haha fuckin' hilarious! Haha!Copy !req
246. Okay, so Charlie is
dealing with something very important,Copy !req
247. so while she's gone,
we are making a new commercial.Copy !req
248. One that represents
her vision and what we're doing here.Copy !req
249. So we need a camera. Alastor?Copy !req
250. A video camera.Copy !req
251. Hmm?Copy !req
252. All right, let's do this!Copy !req
253. And...Copy !req
254. Action.Copy !req
255. " Welcome to the Hazbin HotelCopy !req
256. Can I help you with anything?"Copy !req
257. " I've been a bad boy.Copy !req
258. And I need a big, strong daddy
to put me in my place...Copy !req
259. On the path to redemption."Copy !req
260. - " Well, you come..."
- "Oh y es!"Copy !req
261. "...To the right place."Copy !req
262. Cut.
Okay, Angel,Copy !req
263. I need you to be less horny, if
possible.Copy !req
264. And Husk, can you maybe not
have a script in front of your face?Copy !req
265. I ain't no act.Copy !req
266. I can't memorize this shit.Copy !req
267. - Well, we could improv this shit.
- Baby cakes. Rawrrr.Copy !req
268. - Whoops.
- Husk, Come on.Copy !req
269. So I was playin' this
gig, and for some fuckin' reasonCopy !req
270. this virtue chick was diggin' on the drummer,Copy !req
271. and it's like,
do you know who I am?Copy !req
272. I'm fuckin' Adam.
I'm the original dick!Copy !req
273. All dicks descend from me.Copy !req
274. You think you want drummer
dick? No way,Copy !req
275. I'm the Dick-fuckin'
master!Copy !req
276. So anyway, then we fucked,
and it was awesome.Copy !req
277. What'd you do this
weekend?Copy !req
278. Wait, your name is Adam?Copy !req
279. Like the first man Adam?
That means you...Copy !req
280. Ohhh...Copy !req
281. That explains so much.Copy !req
282. I know. I fucking rock.Copy !req
283. Well, Adam, sir. Mr. Adam, sir.Copy !req
284. Call me Dickmaster.Copy !req
285. Adam, you seem like a smart...Copy !req
286. well, stand up guy.Copy !req
287. Uh-huh.Copy !req
288. And I know you
are the leader of the angels.Copy !req
289. And you are a big thinker,
a revolutionary, a... a genius!Copy !req
290. I mean, your words, babe.Copy !req
291. Who would really love
to put his name on something.Copy !req
292. Fucking
love putting my name on shit.Copy !req
293. Shit's the best.Copy !req
294. It's a solution to our biggest
problem!Copy !req
295. Oh, herpes.Copy !req
296. Yeah, that's a bitch.Copy !req
297. No! Our other biggest problem.Copy !req
298. Oh, uh... ugly people?
Math?Copy !req
299. Global warming?
Nah, wait that's Earth's problem.Copy !req
300. Umm...Copy !req
301. Hehehe. Stab. Stab. Stab.Copy !req
302. Alright Niffty.
Niffty? Niffty!Copy !req
303. Your line is
"We have the cleanest rooms."Copy !req
304. - Okay?
- Got it. I'm ready.Copy !req
305. Action.Copy !req
306. Uhh... Cut.Copy !req
307. How was that?Copy !req
308. Well Niffty, you actually have
to say the line. So let's roll again.Copy !req
309. - Okay.
- Action.Copy !req
310. - You're doing great, Vagina.
- Cut!Copy !req
311. Alright, um, maybe we can try
to fix it in post.Copy !req
312. Do you even know
what that means?Copy !req
313. I'll figure it out.Copy !req
314. Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel.Copy !req
315. Seems like you're
having a bit of trouble there, hm?Copy !req
316. Ugh, este pendejo... Why are you
even here?Copy !req
317. For the entertainment!Copy !req
318. I came here because I love
seeing wasteful soulsCopy !req
319. struggle to accomplish
something meaningful and fail spectacularly.Copy !req
320. Like you are doing now!Copy !req
321. Good Job!Copy !req
322. And here is Alastor,Copy !req
323. the egocentric piece
of shit that...Copy !req
324. I wouldn't try that my dear.Copy !req
325. This face was made for radio!Copy !req
326. That's it!Copy !req
327. I don't care who
or what you are.Copy !req
328. If you are staying here,
you are going to make this work.Copy !req
329. Because it won't be so
"entertaining"Copy !req
330. to watch over an
empty hotel will it, shitass?Copy !req
331. Fair enough. I'll tell you what!Copy !req
332. - Let's make a deal.
- Pft!Copy !req
333. Do you think I'm that stupid?
Making a deal with a demon like you.Copy !req
334. Not for your soul,
just a simple deal.Copy !req
335. I do this for you, and you never
ask me to engageCopy !req
336. with this frivolous television
technology ever again.Copy !req
337. Or... Charlie can come
back to absolutely nothing!Copy !req
338. your choice.Copy !req
339. Fine.Copy !req
340. Now then.Copy !req
341. Alright, everyone! Let's make a
fucking commercial.Copy !req
342. ... When you take her out
for the fifth timeCopy !req
343. and she still expects you to pay
the check, but you're like,Copy !req
344. "Hey I thought you wanted equality"Copy !req
345. No!
Our shared problem ofCopy !req
346. overpopulation in Hell.Copy !req
347. Ohh! Well, that's not a problem!
We got that covered.Copy !req
348. Lute, how many
demons did you kill this year?Copy !req
349. Got a good 275 this year, sir.Copy !req
350. 275?
Whoa, Badass!Copy !req
351. Awesome job, danger
tits! Pound it.Copy !req
352. Uh, no, not awesome.Copy !req
353. Those are my people,
you know that, right?Copy !req
354. Ohhh, yeah...Copy !req
355. That must suck for you.
Hahahaha.Copy !req
356. But these are souls.Copy !req
357. Human souls, just the same as
the ones you have up in Heaven.Copy !req
358. They are not the same.Copy !req
359. They had their chance and
they earned damnation.Copy !req
360. You're wrong.Copy !req
361. Sinners made mistakes, sure,Copy !req
362. but everyone makes mistakes.Copy !req
363. Angels don't make mistakes.Copy !req
364. You really think that?Copy !req
365. I know that.Copy !req
366. Yeah, I've never made a mistake
in my fuckin' lifeCopy !req
367. The only reason you're still hereCopy !req
368. is because Daddy gave you
and your Hellborn-kindCopy !req
369. a pardon from an exorcist blade.Copy !req
370. How does that feel?
To know how little you matter.Copy !req
371. Oops, almost out of time.
Guess we should get into it...Copy !req
372. Oh! Fuck!Copy !req
373. I've got a lot to get through.
and not a lot of time.Copy !req
374. and I feel like you weren't really hearing
me before, so here it goes.Copy !req
375. I know Hell's populationCopy !req
376. Is out of controlCopy !req
377. It's a bad situationCopy !req
378. It's taking a tollCopy !req
379. If we rehab these sinnersCopy !req
380. And cleanse all their soulsCopy !req
381. At my Hazbin HotelCopy !req
382. Wait, I'm getting ahead of
myself! Right! Extermination!Copy !req
383. I know you guys fly down
Just to kill once a yearCopy !req
384. And it must be annoying
To schlep all the way hereCopy !req
385. If they join you in Heaven
That trip disappearsCopy !req
386. you can wave
that chore farewellCopy !req
387. It'll be a happy day in...Copy !req
388. Let me stop you right
thereCopy !req
389. Save us all precious timeCopy !req
390. If what you're suggesting
Is letting them climbCopy !req
391. Up the ladder oh they'd
Rather cross the Pearly GatesCopy !req
392. Sorry, sweetie but there's no
Defyin' their fatesCopy !req
393. 'Cause Hell is forever
Whether you like it or notCopy !req
394. Had their chance to behave
Better now they boil in the potCopy !req
395. 'Cause the rules are black &
White There's no use in tryin' To fight itCopy !req
396. They're burnin' for their
Lives Until we kill 'em againCopy !req
397. Okay,
but-- - Let's just try to chillax babeCopy !req
398. - You're wasting your breath
- Hehe...Copy !req
399. Did I hear you implyCopy !req
400. That they don't
deserve deathCopy !req
401. Are they winners,
Are they SinnersCopy !req
402. 'Cause it's cut and dryCopy !req
403. Well actually
if you take a look...Copy !req
404. Fair is fair, an eye for
an eyeCopy !req
405. And when all's said and done
There's the question of funCopy !req
406. And for those of us with
Divine ordainmentCopy !req
407. Extermination is
EntertainmentCopy !req
408. Guitar solo, fuck yeahCopy !req
409. Ugh...Copy !req
410. Hell is foreverCopy !req
411. Whether you like it or notCopy !req
412. Had their chance to
behave betterCopy !req
413. Now they boil in the potCopy !req
414. 'Cause the rules
Are black & whiteCopy !req
415. There's no use in tryin'
To fight itCopy !req
416. They're burnin' for their
LivesCopy !req
417. Until we kill 'em againCopy !req
418. Fuckin' Hell is foreverCopy !req
419. And it's meant
To suck a lotCopy !req
420. So give up
Your dumb endeavorCopy !req
421. Cause you don't have a shotCopy !req
422. Long as I've got your Attention,
I guess I should Probably mentionCopy !req
423. That we've made the
DeterminationCopy !req
424. - To move up the next Extermination
- What!Copy !req
425. Can't wait a whole year to
Slaughter those little cuntsCopy !req
426. I know it's just been a week
But we'll be back in six monthsCopy !req
427. Um, wait, didn't you...Copy !req
428. Awh, shit!Copy !req
429. Charlie.Copy !req
430. How did it go? Did they listen?Copy !req
431. Oh, uh... They sure did...
hear it! But, um...Copy !req
432. Oh! Come here. We have
something exciting to show you!Copy !req
433. Alastor pulled some strings,
and it's about to air.Copy !req
434. I pulled a few limbs
too! Hahaha!Copy !req
435. Wait? The commercial?Copy !req
436. You all made a new one?Copy !req
437. Yeah, one of my better
performances, if I do say so myself.Copy !req
438. That's... that's amazing.Copy !req
439. Shush, it's starting!Copy !req
440. Welcome
to the Hazbin Hot...Copy !req
441. Breaking news in Hell today!Copy !req
442. We have just received word
from the Heaven EmbassyCopy !req
443. that the next extermination is
happening sooner than ever before.Copy !req
444. - Do you know what that means Tom?
- No. what does that mean, Katie?Copy !req
445. It means we are all
royally fucked.Copy !req
446. Wait... What? Why?!Copy !req
447. We found the body, sir.Copy !req
448. They've never managed
to kill one of us before.Copy !req
449. We should just go
down there now and destroy them.Copy !req
450. No, no. We can't risk
them catching on.Copy !req
451. But
don't worry, when we come back,Copy !req
452. there won't be a demon left
alive to pull a stunt like this again!Copy !req