1. ON THE LAST EPISODE OF
"HARVEY BIRDMAN,
Copy !req
2. ATTORNEY AT LAW..."
Copy !req
3. BEFORE I GO,
I'M GONNA NEED SOMEBODY TO
Copy !req
4. RUN THE SHIP.
Copy !req
5. YES?
Copy !req
6. AND NOW I'D LIKE TO REWARD
YOU BY—
Copy !req
7. YES?
Copy !req
8. MAKING YOU...
Copy !req
9. MY NEW—
UH, PHIL?
Copy !req
10. AHEM.
Copy !req
11. YOU KNOW, I THINK WE'VE
ESTABLISHED WHAT THAT BUTTON
Copy !req
12. DOES.
Copy !req
13. OH, THIS ONE?
Copy !req
14. HOW ABOUT TRYING ANOTHER
Copy !req
15. BUTTON?
Copy !req
16. THE OVERHEAD FAN?
Copy !req
17. THAT ONE'S FUN.
Copy !req
18. OH, GOSH, I'M SORRY.
Copy !req
19. NOPE.
Copy !req
20. NOT IT.
Copy !req
21. NO.
Copy !req
22. WHAT THE—
OOH, MAYBE THIS ONE.
Copy !req
23. UH, THANK YOU.
Copy !req
24. YES?
Copy !req
25. DO YOU MIND TELLING ME JUST
WHAT THE HELL YOU'RE DOING?
Copy !req
26. UH, RUNNING THE FIRM NOW THAT
PHIL'S—UH, DEAD.
Copy !req
27. DADDY!
Copy !req
28. OH, I MEAN—
PHIL!
Copy !req
29. PHIL'S 9:00 IS HERE.
Copy !req
30. OH, UH—SEND HIM—
Copy !req
31. OR HER, IN.
Copy !req
32. NO REASON TO ASSUME IT'S A "HE"
APPOINTMENT.
Copy !req
33. PSH, PIG.
Copy !req
34. ONE MOMENT.
Copy !req
35. AND NOW, WE MAKE FUNERAL!
Copy !req
36. AH, MIA BELLA DONNA.
Copy !req
37. WHY YOU MAKE
THE LACRIMISMATISSIMAMA?
Copy !req
38. WHY IS SHE CRYING?
Copy !req
39. PHIL!
Copy !req
40. AH, MR. PHIL.
Copy !req
41. SI, SI.
Copy !req
42. A GREAT LOSS FOR ALL.
Copy !req
43. DADDY!
Copy !req
44. I WILL NEVER SPEAK
TO HIM AGAIN!
Copy !req
45. DADDY?
Copy !req
46. PHIL.
Copy !req
47. FROM THE WINDOW OF
Copy !req
48. THE MEN'S ROOM,
WHERE I HAVE SERVED AS
Copy !req
49. A HUMBLE ATTENDANT SINCE
THIS ONE WAS PROMOTED OVER ME
Copy !req
50. AND MY PROMISING CAREER WAS
CUT SHORT,
Copy !req
51. FROM THERE, I, MYSELF,
WITNESSED PHIL'S PASSING.
Copy !req
52. FROM THERE, I, MYSELF,
WITNESSED PHIL'S PASSING.
Copy !req
53. FROM THERE, I, MYSELF,
WITNESSED PHIL'S PASSING.
Copy !req
54. ALAS, NOW I CANNOT USE THESE
PHOTOGRAPHS TO BLACKMAIL
Copy !req
55. MR. PHIL INTO GIVING ME
YOUR OFFICE AND JOB,
Copy !req
56. SO I CAN ASSUME MY RIGHTFUL
PLACE IN THE FIRM!
Copy !req
57. I'M NOT USING MY OFFICE
ANYMORE.
Copy !req
58. YOU CAN HAVE IT!
Copy !req
59. AND MY OLD JOB!
Copy !req
60. OH!
Copy !req
61. OH, GRAZIE!
Copy !req
62. YOU'RE INDEED A BENEVOLENT
RULER, AND I SHALL NOT
Copy !req
63. DISAPPOINT YOU!
Copy !req
64. I WILL USE THIS OPPORTUNITY
TO CRUSH YOU!
Copy !req
65. SI!
Copy !req
66. IF IT IS THE LAST THING I DO,
I WILL DESTROY YOU!
Copy !req
67. BUT AGAIN, I AM FOREVER
INDEBTED.
Copy !req
68. SLASH VENGEFUL.
Copy !req
69. THEY'RE COMING AT YOU
FROM EVERY SIDE!
Copy !req
70. BIRDMAN, YOU NEED MY HELP!
Copy !req
71. LISTEN, THANKS,
BUT I CAN HANDLE IT.
Copy !req
72. HARVEY, YOUR NEXT MEETING
Copy !req
73. IS HERE.
Copy !req
74. GET DOWN!
Copy !req
75. OOF!
Copy !req
76. WATCH IT!
Copy !req
77. MARY!
Copy !req
78. I—I BROUGHT YOU A COFFEE.
Copy !req
79. THANK, UH—THANK YOU.
Copy !req
80. YES.
Copy !req
81. WELL.
Copy !req
82. MARY, AS YOU KNOW, PHIL'S LAST
WISH WAS THAT I RUN THE FIRM.
Copy !req
83. POOR PHIL.
Copy !req
84. POOR DADDY!
Copy !req
85. STOP IT!
Copy !req
86. ANYWAY, I'VE BEEN GOING THROUGH
THE THINGS THAT HE, AND NOT I,
Copy !req
87. INTENDED TO DO.
Copy !req
88. I'D DO THE EXACT SAME THING!
Copy !req
89. UNLESS IT MEANT, LIKE,
FIRING SOMEONE OR SOMETHING.
Copy !req
90. HAH!
Copy !req
91. HA HA HA!
Copy !req
92. WELL, THAT'S INTERESTING,
SEE, BECAUSE BEFORE PHIL WALKED
Copy !req
93. OUT OF HERE AND GOT HIT BY
THE BUS—
Copy !req
94. MY NEW—
WELL, HE COMPLETED YOUR
Copy !req
95. REVIEW.
Copy !req
96. I'M HONORED!
Copy !req
97. IT SAYS RIGHT HERE YOU GOTTA
FIRE HER.
Copy !req
98. IS MY RAISE AS GOOD AS LAST
YEAR'S?
Copy !req
99. 2%!
Copy !req
100. HA HA.
Copy !req
101. WELL.
Copy !req
102. LITTLE SHORT OF SNACKING
MATERIAL DOWN HERE!
Copy !req
103. I'M FAMISHED.
Copy !req
104. A RAISE?
Copy !req
105. UM, WELL—
FIRE HER!
Copy !req
106. DO IT!
Copy !req
107. YEAH.
Copy !req
108. YOU SEE, I HAD TO GIVE UP MY
OTHER JOB SO I COULD TAKE CARE
Copy !req
109. OF MY MOTHER.
Copy !req
110. AND THEN THERE'S THE LUNCH MONEY
THAT I'VE BEEN SENDING TO
Copy !req
111. THE AFRICAN SCHOOLCHILDREN...
Copy !req
112. SO, HOW MUCH IS MY RAISE?
Copy !req
113. 20%!
Copy !req
114. NOTHING!
Copy !req
115. IN FACT, YOU'RE FIRED!
Copy !req
116. KA-DOWNSIZED!
Copy !req
117. YOU SPEND 5 HOURS A DAY GOOGLING
PICTURES OF KITTENS IN
Copy !req
118. RAIN BOOTS!
Copy !req
119. OUT!
Copy !req
120. HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME!
Copy !req
121. AND THE SCHOOL KIDS!
Copy !req
122. IT WAS PHIL!
Copy !req
123. HOW DARE YOU BLAME
A DEAD MAN, YOU BASTARD!
Copy !req
124. HE'S DEAD, I TELL YA!
Copy !req
125. DADDY!
Copy !req
126. WELL, ONLY 19 MORE PEOPLE
Copy !req
127. PHIL WANTED FIRED.
Copy !req
128. MR.--SLIGHT RETCH—
BIRDMAN'S OFFICE.
Copy !req
129. HI, DEBBIE, IT'S ME.
Copy !req
130. PUT ME THROUGH, PLEASE.
Copy !req
131. HELLO?
Copy !req
132. IT'S "X."
Copy !req
133. AH, X THE ELIMINATOR?
Copy !req
134. YEAH, I'D LIKE TO SPEAK
TO HARVEY IF I COULD, PLEASE.
Copy !req
135. NO, HE'S BOOKED THROUGH
DECEMBER.
Copy !req
136. TRY BACK NEXT YEAR.
Copy !req
137. LOOK!
Copy !req
138. I NEED TO TALK TO HIM, OK?
Copy !req
139. IT'S REGARDING TONIGHT'S MENU!
Copy !req
140. I DON'T HAVE HIM DOWN FOR
DINNER TONIGHT—
Copy !req
141. I, UH, DIDN'T INVITE HIM YET.
Copy !req
142. I UNDERSTAND.
Copy !req
143. SHORT NOTICE.
Copy !req
144. I HATE HIM!
Copy !req
145. UM, WELL?
Copy !req
146. HE'S NOT COMING!
Copy !req
147. I'M A WORK WIDOW!
Copy !req
148. I'M ALL BY MYSELF!
Copy !req
149. A SAD, LITTLE MAN,
ALL ALONE IN THE WORLD.
Copy !req
150. AHEM.
Copy !req
151. I KNOW!
Copy !req
152. WE'LL GO ASK IN PERSON!
Copy !req
153. YEAH, HI—
I TOLD YOU, HE'S BUSY.
Copy !req
154. LOOK, I KNOW HE CAN'T—
COME TO DINNER TONIGHT!
Copy !req
155. I'M PLANNING THE MENU FOR WHEN
HE CAN COME!
Copy !req
156. AND I NEED TO KNOW IF HE'S
LACTOSE INTOLERANT!
Copy !req
157. YOU KNOW, WE NEED TO DO
Copy !req
158. SOMETHING BIGGER, HERE.
Copy !req
159. TO GET HIS ATTENTION SOMEHOW.
Copy !req
160. BUT WHAT?
Copy !req
161. WHAT, WHAT, WHAT, WHAT, WHAT,
WHAT?
Copy !req
162. OH!
Copy !req
163. I KNOW!
Copy !req
164. WE'RE GONNA KIDNAP BIRDGIRL,
BRING HER TO MY PLACE,
Copy !req
165. AND THAT WAY, HARVEY WILL HAVE
TO COME OVER!
Copy !req
166. HA HA HA!
Copy !req
167. LET'S PRACTICE.
Copy !req
168. WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MAN?
Copy !req
169. COME ON, I'M PUTTING ON
A MASK.
Copy !req
170. BUT YOU ALREADY HAVE A MASK.
Copy !req
171. IT'S A VERY NICE RED ONE, MAN.
Copy !req
172. YOU DON'T NEED TO WEAR
ANOTHER MASK.
Copy !req
173. YES I DO.
Copy !req
174. EVERYONE RECOGNIZES ME IN THIS
MASK, SO I HAVE TO WEAR A MASK
Copy !req
175. OVER MY MASK.
Copy !req
176. NOW, HERE, I GOT YOU ONE, TOO.
Copy !req
177. IF EVERYONE RECOGNIZES US
ALREADY IN OUR DISGUISES, MAN,
Copy !req
178. WOULDN'T IT BE EASIER JUST TO
TAKE OFF THE ONE MASK WE ALREADY
Copy !req
179. HAVE ON?
Copy !req
180. AND KIDNAP HER WITH NO MASKS?
Copy !req
181. BECAUSE NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN OUR
FACES, SO THEY WOULDN'T
Copy !req
182. RECOGNIZE US.
Copy !req
183. AND THEN AFTER WE'RE DONE,
WE JUST PUT OUR ONE MASKS
Copy !req
184. BACK ON, AND NEVER SHOW OUR
FACES AGAIN, AND THEN NO ONE
Copy !req
185. WOULD EVER RECOGNIZE US.
Copy !req
186. INSTEAD OF WEARING 2 MASKS.
Copy !req
187. JUST PUT IT ON!
Copy !req
188. OK, LET'S PRACTICE.
Copy !req
189. SCANNING FOR A SUITABLE PROXY.
Copy !req
190. AND THERE WE GO!
Copy !req
191. HOW DO WE GET HER INTO
YOUR HOUSE?
Copy !req
192. WE DIDN'T BRING A CAR.
Copy !req
193. HEY-OH!
Copy !req
194. IT'S OLD HATCHET HARV!
Copy !req
195. LITTLE RUMOR GOIN' AROUND YOU
WERE BROUGHT IN FROM THE OUTSIDE
Copy !req
196. TO CLEAN HOUSE.
Copy !req
197. PEANUT'S SAFE, RIGHT?
Copy !req
198. 2 THINGS: I'M GOING TO LUNCH,
Copy !req
199. AND THE OFFICE HAS DEGRADED INTO
SECTARIAN VIOLENCE.
Copy !req
200. UH, EVERY—EVERYBODY!
Copy !req
201. CAN WE JUST STOP WASTING
STAPLES?
Copy !req
202. HEY, EVERYONE, JUST PUT DOWN
YOUR OFFICE SUPPLIES.
Copy !req
203. I PROMISE I'LL STOP FIRING
PEOPLE.
Copy !req
204. HE LIVES!
Copy !req
205. PHIL'S BACK!
Copy !req
206. PHIL'S BACK!
Copy !req
207. STEPHEN'S BACK!
Copy !req
208. OUR PHIL WHO'S BACK
FROM THE DEAD
Copy !req
209. THE LAW FIRM
PHIL, THE LAW FIRM
Copy !req
210. I WON'T BELIEVE IT
UNTIL I
Copy !req
211. SIDES!
Copy !req
212. ACTUALLY, I WAS THINKING
HIS PANTS.
Copy !req
213. MASTER!
Copy !req
214. I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW TOUCHED
I AM.
Copy !req
215. WAIT!
Copy !req
216. YOU'RE NOT PHIL!
Copy !req
217. HA HA, I'M NOT PHIL.
Copy !req
218. I'M HIS TWIN BROTHER BILL,
AND I'M THE EXECUTOR OF
Copy !req
219. PHIL'S WILL.
Copy !req
220. AHEM.
Copy !req
221. "I, PHIL KEN SEBBEN,
BEING OF SOUND—"
Copy !req
222. HELLO?
Copy !req
223. OH, I GUESS NOW YOU'RE GONNA
TAKE MY CALL!
Copy !req
224. WHO'S THIS?
Copy !req
225. JUST A CERTAIN SOMEONE
WHO'S KIDNAPPED A CERTAIN GIRL
Copy !req
226. SOMEONE WITH FAKE WINGS.
Copy !req
227. OH, YOU KIDNAPPED BIRDGIRL.
Copy !req
228. YEP!
Copy !req
229. AND IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER ALIVE
AGAIN, YOU'LL HAVE TO COME OVER
Copy !req
230. HERE TO RESCUE HER.
Copy !req
231. OH, AND WHILE YOU'RE HERE,
YOU CAN STAY FOR DINNER.
Copy !req
232. BWAH, HA HA HA HA!
Copy !req
233. OH, AND WE MADE CRAB CAKES.
Copy !req
234. AND FINALLY, CONTROL AND
OWNERSHIP OF THE LAW FIRM GOES
Copy !req
235. TO MY BELOVED DAUGHTER JUDY.
Copy !req
236. AND THE WHIP—SHE GETS THAT,
TOO.
Copy !req
237. HOORAY!
Copy !req
238. WAHOO!
Copy !req
239. WHO'S JUDY?
Copy !req
240. JUDY'S TAKING OVER THE JOB!
Copy !req
241. YES!
Copy !req
242. WAIT.
Copy !req
243. JUDY!
Copy !req
244. BIRDMAN SHOULD'VE BEEN HERE
Copy !req
245. HOURS AGO!
Copy !req
246. WHERE IS HE?
Copy !req
247. WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN YOUR BAG?
Copy !req
248. CAN I SEE WHAT'S IN YOUR BAG!
Copy !req
249. I MIGHT BE ABLE TO USE WHAT'S IN
HERE TO HELP US ESCAPE!
Copy !req
250. LET'S SEE.
Copy !req
251. TISSUES, YARN,
"READER'S DIGEST," WAIT—
Copy !req
252. IS THAT C4?
Copy !req
253. NOW I'LL JUST CONSULT MY
SUPERHERO SIDEKICK HANDBOOK.
Copy !req
254. CREATE A DIVERSION,
BLOW THE WINDOW OPEN, JUMP OUT,
Copy !req
255. GOT IT!
Copy !req
256. BIRDTEAM IS GO!
Copy !req
257. WELL, I GUESS I'M YOUR
Copy !req
258. BOSS NOW.
Copy !req
259. AND YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?
Copy !req
260. I HAVE TO WALK YOUR
STANDARD POODLES?
Copy !req
261. NO!
Copy !req
262. IT MEANS THAT SINCE I'M YOUR
BOSS, AND YOUR SUPER SECRET
Copy !req
263. SIDEKICK, YOU CAN NO LONGER KNOW
MY SECRET IDENTITY.
Copy !req
264. I DON'T SEE WHY NOT.
Copy !req
265. IT'S A CONFLICT!
Copy !req
266. I... DON'T GET IT.
Copy !req
267. I WENT OVER IT WITH H.R.
Copy !req
268. I HAVE TO ERASE YOUR MEMORY
WITH MY—
Copy !req
269. BIRDGIRL MEM-ERASE!
Copy !req
270. HOLD STILL.
Copy !req
271. AAGH!
Copy !req
272. MY EYES!
Copy !req
273. SORRY, THAT WAS PEPPER SPRAY.
Copy !req
274. SINGLE GIRL, BIG CITY,
CAN'T BE TOO CAREFUL.
Copy !req
275. HERE IT IS!
Copy !req
276. AAGH!
Copy !req
277. MY EYES!
Copy !req
278. WHAT HAPPENED?
Copy !req
279. I DON'T REMEMBER ANYTHING
FROM SPECIFICALLY THE PAST
Copy !req
280. COUPLE DAYS.
Copy !req
281. OH, BERGMAN, THANK YOU FOR
Copy !req
282. YOUR OFFICE.
Copy !req
283. I HAVE PUT YOUR—WRETCH—THINGS
IN THIS BOX FOR YOU.
Copy !req
284. OY.
Copy !req
285. [CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
Copy !req
286. —www.ncicap.org—]
YOU SURE HE WANTED COMPACTED
Copy !req
287. AND NOT CREMATED?
Copy !req
288. SMALLER!
Copy !req