Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law 4x2

Directed by Richard Ferguson-Hull

Peter Potamus consumes radioactive pellets that transform him into "the creature," turning him green and tripling his waist size. Meanwhile, Atom Ant is charged with having high radiations levels in his home.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. UP AND AT 'EM, ATOM ANT.

2. I THINK I'VE GOT SOMETHING.

3. IT'S COMING FROM OVER HERE.

4. OCCUPATO!

5. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?

6. HEY, HEY!

7. IT'S BAGEL DAY.

8. MAKE WAY.

9. WHAT'LL YOU HAVE?

10. UM...

11. OMAR AND I ARE CURIOUS IF YOU HAVE A POPPY.

12. SURE DO.

13. DECENT YIELD.

14. COME IN.

15. NOW, THAT'S STRANGE.

16. THERE WAS A KNOCK, AND THEN THE DOOR JUST...

17. UH, HARVEY BIRDMAN.

18. ATOM ANT.

19. SO, WHAT SEEMS TO BE THE PROBLEM?

20. THE E.P.A. CONDEMNED MY HOME.

21. THEY SAY IT'S FILLED WITH RADIOACTIVE WASTE.

22. ARE THOSE POPPY?

23. INFERIOR GRADE, BUT, YES.

24. PLEASE, HELP YOURSELF.

25. OOH!

26. CINNAMON RAISON!

27. CINNAMON, YES.

28. RAISONS, NO.

29. EH?

30. EH?

31. "EH?" YOU GONNA TELL ME HOW GOOD I

32. LOOK?

33. I LOST 15.

34. POUNDS?

35. WOW!

36. OUNCES.

37. MY CLOTHES ARE HANGING OFF ME!

38. YEAH!

39. OY, GAULT.

40. PLEASE TELL ME THOSE AIN'T HEISENBERB BROTHERS BAGELS!

41. WHAT KIND SHOULD I HAVE?

42. I'M UNCERTAIN.

43. I HAVEN'T HAD BREAD FOR MONTHS.

44. I'VE HAD A WALLEAR FOR A KAISER

45. ROLL OR SOMETHING STARCHY.

46. OYSTER CRACKERS— ANYTHING!

47. A SANDWICH WITHOUT BREAD ISN'T A SANDWICH—IT'S MEAT WITH

48. MUSTARD ON YOUR HANDS!

49. WHAT'S THAT ONE?

50. POPPY!

51. HERE IT IS.

52. HERE IT IS.

53. ANY SCOTIA LOX?

54. MEMBERS OF THE JURY, MY CLIENT ATOM ANT HERE—

55. UH-UH.

56. SORRY, HERE— PROTECTED US, SHIELDED US IF YOU

57. WILL FROM A VERITABLE ROGUES GALLERY OF VILLAINS.

58. AND IN THANKS, HAS NOW BEEN FORCIBLY REMOVED, UPROOTED FROM

59. HIS...

60. ANT HOLE.

61. HOME AFTER 20 YEARS AND PLOPPED UNCEREMONIOUSLY

62. ON THE STREET.

63. I HAD AN ANT FARM ONCE.

64. UH...

65. OH, YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS GOING SOMEWHERE.

66. NOPE, THAT'S PRETTY MUCH IT.

67. MY GRAIN OF RICE WITH A CARVING OF ST. JABBENEEZER,

68. BIGGER THAN HE.

69. MY TINY, TINY DANCER MUSIC BOX...

70. BIGGER.

71. MY STRONTIUM 12 PROCESSOR!

72. IT CAN'T BE.

73. IT'S BIG...

74. GER.

75. RIGHT.

76. I HEREBY PLACE AN INJUNCTION ON ANY FURTHER WASTE PRODUCTION BY

77. MR. SHORT AND PESTY.

78. BUT, YOUR HONOR, THAT'S OUTRAGEOUS.

79. HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO STOP MY CLIENT FROM PRODUCING ANY WASTE?

80. ONE ALLIGATOR...

81. TWO ALLIGATOR.

82. NOW.

83. MY TEENSY, TINY RUSSIAN NESTING CORK.

84. COME ON!

85. STUPID MUSTARD PAK!

86. CAN'T HAVE CAPICOLE WITHOUT MUSTARD!

87. DAMN IT!

88. THE THING WON'T OPEN!

89. I CAN'T OPEN THAT THING!

90. I DO THANK YOU FOR COMING OVER, DETECTIVE INCH.

91. I KNOW WE'VE NOT HAD THE MOST AMICABLE OF RELATIONSHIPS.

92. BACK OFF!

93. BUT I NOW REALIZE THAT IN LARGE—LARGE MEASURE, THAT IT IS

94. BECAUSE I, UP TILL NOW, VIEWED YOU AS A THREAT, AN ENEMY.

95. AND NOW, OH, HOW I KNOW BETTER.

96. FOR THERE IS SOMEONE SMALLER, AND YOU AND I AS WE ARE NOW—

97. BOUND TOGETHER BY THE STEELIEST OF BONDS, CUFFED, MANACLED TO

98. EACH OTHER BY SHAME AND HATE AND RAGE BECAUSE YOU AND I, WE—US

99. TWO—ARE NO LONGER THE PREEMINENT IN LILLIPUTIANISM,

100. THE BIGGEST IN SMALL.

101. I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT THAT'S ACTUALLY KIND OF

102. WELCOME NEWS TO M— SILENCE, WEE WILLY,

103. OR I'LL SHRINK YOU!

104. NO, WAIT.

105. THAT WOULD MAKE YOU EVEN SMALLER THAN HE.

106. UGH!

107. YES.

108. WE WHO WERE ONCE DIVIDED IN SMALLNESS ARE NOW UNITED IN OUR

109. RELATIVE LARGENESS.

110. THERE IS SOMETHING YOU MUST DO.

111. I AIN'T TOUCHING THE CORK.

112. NO, SOMETHING DIFFERENT.

113. BUT I WILL HAVE TO GET THAT BACK AT SOME POINT...

114. FOR THE COLLECTION.

115. WHAT HAPPENED?

116. ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

117. I HAVE NO IDEA.

118. I WAS IN A LUNCH ROOM TRYING TO OPEN A MUSTARD PAK,

119. AND NOW MY CLOTHES ARE ALL RIPPED UP.

120. YOU GOTTA HELP ME.

121. WHO AM I?

122. HEY, HEY.

123. IT'S STARTING TO COME BACK.

124. THIS PENCIL— IT'S BROKEN COMPLETELY IN HALF.

125. NO ORDINARY MAN COULD HAVE DONE THIS—UNLESS HE'S A MUTANT GIANT

126. FIENDISH MONSTROSITY MAN.

127. I MUST TRACK IT AND FIND IT AND CAPTURE IT, AND DEPENDING ON MY

128. MOOD, EITHER KILL IT OR BRING IT TO JUSTICE.

129. WHAT'S THIS?

130. A TORN PIECE OF KHAKI FABRIC.

131. I KNOW SOMEONE IN THE OFFICE WEARS KHAKI, BUT I CAN'T

132. REMEMBER WHOM!

133. NO, THIS IS MORE OF A CHEAP POLY BLEND WHILE THE SAMPLE IS

134. COTTON.

135. NOT TO MENTION, MINE'S BLUE.

136. NEXT.

137. OK, THAT'S RAYON.

138. LET'S SEE IF THERE'S COTTON UNDER HERE.

139. COTTON ALL RIGHT.

140. AND MISSING FABRIC...

141. IN THE CROTCH.

142. LUCKY FOR YOU, LADY, THIS CAME FROM A CUFF SEAM.

143. HEY, HIPPO!

144. WANT A DOUGHNUT.

145. DON'T MAKE ME HUNGRY, MR. PEANUT.

146. YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME WHEN I'M HUNGRY.

147. OH, YOU'RE RIGHT.

148. BLOW ON!

149. OH, SORRY.

150. I THOUGHT THIS WAS THE GENTLEMAN'S.

151. WAIT.

152. ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

153. HUH?

154. NO, NO.

155. IT'S NOTHING.

156. I GOTTA BE GOING.

157. YOU'RE BLEEDING.

158. THAT'S JELLY DOUGHNUT.

159. WAIT.

160. YOU'RE THE CREATURE, AREN'T YOU?

161. NO!

162. I WANT TO HELP YOU.

163. BUT YOU WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND.

164. THERE'S A BEAST, AN ANIMAL, LIKE A RAGING...

165. UH...

166. HIPPO?

167. NAH.

168. WHAT ARE THEM ONES WITH HORNS?

169. UH, RHINO?

170. YEAH, RHINO!

171. A RAGING RHINO INSIDE ME THAT I CAN'T CONTROL.

172. LOOK, I CAN HELP.

173. I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO HAVE TO HIDE IN PLAIN SIGHT,

174. TO DENY PART OF WHO YOU ARE.

175. I WILL KEEP YOUR SECRET.

176. OH, HELLO, JUDY.

177. HI, DADDY.

178. LEFT MY BOOK IN HERE.

179. "FAMILIES DON'T KEEP SECRETS FROM EACH OTHER, ESPECIALLY NOT

180. TWO SECRETS AT ONCE."

181. YOU'D NEVER KEEP A SECRET FROM ME, WOULD YOU, SWEETHEART?

182. OH, NO!

183. I PROMISED TO HELP PETER, BUT TO HELP ME, I HAVE TO KEEP A

184. SECRET FROM DADDY...

185. WHILE I'M ALREADY KEEPING A SECRET FROM HIM THAT I AM, IN

186. FACT, ALSO BIRDGIRL.

187. THAT'S TWO SECRETS!

188. 3 IF YOU COUNT THE FACT THAT— HOW'S IT GOING?

189. GOODLY.

190. YOU?

191. I BEEN BETTER.

192. SORRY TO HEAR THAT.

193. BEEN BUSY?

194. AMONG MY NORMAL DUTIES, I HAVE THIS FABRIC SAMPLE FROM

195. THE CLOTHING OF A MONSTROUS CREATURE THAT'S BEEN TERRORIZING

196. THE OFFICE.

197. LOOKS LIKE THIS.

198. THAT'S IT!

199. COME WITH ME!

200. YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO CONTROL YOUR ANGER SO THE CREATURE

201. DOESN'T COME OUT.

202. FIRST, DEEP BREATHS.

203. IN...

204. AND OUT.

205. IN...

206. AND OUT.

207. FEELING CALMER?

208. CALMER?

209. NO.

210. OK.

211. LET'S TRY POSES!

212. LEGS OFF THE WALL POSE.

213. INTENSE SPREAD LEGS STRETCH.

214. BEAVER POSE!

215. YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME WHEN I'M HORNY.

216. TAKE IT ONE STEP AT A TIME.

217. CONTROL YOUR ANGER.

218. YOU CAN DO IT.

219. HEY, BOSS, YOU GET THAT THING I SENT YOU?

220. WHAT THING?

221. NO!

222. NO!

223. CONTROL IT!

224. THE CREATURE!

225. THE CREATURE!

226. HE'S BECOMING THE CREATURE!

227. WHO ARE YOU?

228. WHO AM I?

229. I AM THE SAME AS YOU.

230. I HAVE THE SAME HATE AS YOU.

231. I HAVE THE SAME LOVE AS YOU— THE LOVE OF DELI MEATS AND EGGS

232. AND STRIPPERS.

233. SHOW YOUR FACE.

234. ALL I WANT IS TO GET RID OF THE CREATURE.

235. SO DO I.

236. STEP OUT OF THE SHADOWS.

237. MR. SEBBEN, YOU RISK BRINGING OUT THE CREATURE IN ME.

238. NOW, PLEASE— PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE.

239. WE BOTH KNOW WHAT CAN HAPPEN!

240. THE MASK, NOW!

241. HA HA HA HA!

242. NUMBY NUTKINS!

243. YOUR TYRANNICAL RULE OVER THE WEENSY IS OVER!

244. I CAN'T DO IT.

245. YOU HAVE TO.

246. DECORK!

247. HE'S GONNA BLOW!

248. JUDY!

249. SWEET, TENDER FLEXIBLE JUDY IS TRAPPED BY A RACK—

250. A RACK OF CARBS!

251. JUDY?

252. JUDY?

253. OH, GOD!

254. HAVE YOU SEEN JUDY?

255. SHE WEARS A YELLOW COWL AND HAS BIG WINGS.

256. NO, WAIT—THAT'S BIRDGIRL.

257. THE CREATURE IS ATTACKING JUDY.

258. BUT, PHIL, HE'S SAVING HER!

259. MY GOD, YOU'RE RIGHT!

260. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

261. I WAS SO WRONG ABOUT THAT CREATURE.

262. DEAD WRONG.

263. HA HA!

264. FORESHADOWING...

265. ABOUT THE DEAD PART, NOT THE WRONG PART.

266. I ONLY SAW HIS GROTESQUE VISAGE, NOT HIS NOBLE, MAJESTIC HEART.

267. JUDY!

268. DAUGHTER!

269. UM, DADDY, YOUR PANZER IS PARKED ON MY

270. FOOT.

271. WELL, EVERYBODY, ALL'S WELL.

272. AND IT TURNS OUT ATOM'S WASTE WASN'T RADIOACTIVE AFTER ALL.

273. OYAGE.

274. HA HA HA HA.

275. WHERE IS THE LITTLE FELLOW

276. ANYWAY?

277. COME ON, DO SOMETHING.

278. MAYBE IF I SHAKE IT.

279. [CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE

280. —www.ncicap.org—]