Haha, You Clowns 1x7

Directed by

The boys beg Dad to let them get a hot tub.

Request examples:

!req Haha, You Clowns 1x7 [02:32]
!req Haha, You Clowns 1x7 [Haha, You Clowns 1x7]
Syntax: !req EPISODE [quote or timestamp] (max. 8 square brackets)

For quotes, now you can request by index (e.g !req Haha, You Clowns 1x7 [10-11]; !req Haha, You Clowns 1x7 [20] [24]). Keep in mind, though, that index numbers might change at any time.
You can also generate a copy command with the quotes. Hover the desired subtitle and enter the amount of lines you want to copy.

Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. Her lips are like A volcano that's hot

2. I'm about to say

3. That she's My buttercup of love

4. Oh, yeah

5. Oh, oh, yeah

6. Nice, Pat!

7. So, what did you think of today's show, Ma?

8. Wasn't as tight as last week, but...

9. we— we'll get there.

10. Practice makes perfect.

11. Says the guy who scoffs a roast beef melt during band practice.

12. At least I remember the lyrics.

13. Well, there's not much incentive to learn lyrics

14. when you guys are always making me sing backup.

15. Hey, Ma, real quick.

16. The buyers want to move forward on the house,

17. but we got to get rid of the old hot tub.

18. Whoa, get rid of Nana's hot tub?

19. It's pretty old.

20. I don't think she's used it in years.

21. Oh, I'm sorry.

22. This is a bit awkward.

23. Um, Nana, I vaguely remember you telling us

24. - that we'd get the sauna. - Yeah.

25. I never said that.

26. I'm pretty sure you did.

27. We were all standing in the kitchen.

28. Tristan was doing a Sammy Davis Jr. impression.

29. You told us about Palm Springs.

30. Hey, you were in a hot tub with Sammy Davis Jr., correct?

31. I mean, fellas, please, tell me if I'm off my rocker here.

32. No, yeah, Nana definitely said we could have her hot tub.

33. Okay, because I was like, am I getting Alzheimer's?

34. Hey, come on, Preston.

35. It's just that all of our lives,

36. we were led to believe one thing.

37. And then just like that...

38. the rug's ripped out from underneath our feet.

39. It's funny.

40. The older I get,

41. the less I believe in anything.

42. A hot tub is a breeding ground for bacteria

43. if it's not taken care of properly.

44. You promise to keep that thing clean?

45. Scout's honor, Dad.

46. All right, then.

47. Yes! We're getting a hot tub!

48. But you gotta keep that thing clean, boys.

49. Hey, Nana, you're the cat's meow.

50. So good.

51. You good. Keep going.

52. How are we looking on that side?

53. We got plenty of room over here. Plenty of room.

54. One small step for man,

55. one giant leap for the Campbell family.

56. Oh my God.

57. You guys, you have to try this.

58. This is amazing.

59. This feels incredible.

60. And I think the steam is loosening up my vocal cords.

61. There it is.

62. Okay, what are we feeling, boys?

63. What's the vibe?

64. Let me see green again.

65. Okay, one sec.

66. Oh my God.

67. Did you know Nana's hot tub has an aux port?

68. Aux port?

69. Where?

70. Well, yeah.

71. - Appreciate you. - Yeah, well, yeah.

72. I think if I have children,

73. I'm leaning towards circumcising.

74. What about you guys?

75. Duncan, what's wrong?

76. I'm just so happy.

77. I just love you guys so much.

78. And we love you, Duncan.

79. I'm sorry I've been so hard on you guys

80. during band practice.

81. No, I should have been making band practice a priority,

82. not roast beef melt.

83. This hot tub's got me in the feels.

84. Okay, let's change the mood in here, shall we?

85. You know, I want our sons to share moments like these.

86. Then let's make an oath tonight, guys.

87. The hot tub stays in our family forever.

88. To the best goddamn night of our entire lives.

89. And to many more to come!

90. Oh, goddamn it.

91. A beautiful night sky to top it all off.

92. I mean, look at that.

93. - Oh, wow. - Did you see that?

94. Hot tub. Final frontier.

95. Good morning, fellas.

96. Oh, yeah, there he is.

97. I think the hot tub really loosened up something.

98. Hey, boys, how was the hot tub?

99. Great.

100. Judging from how late you boys slept, I'd imagine so.

101. Gonna have to try out that hot tub myself.

102. Wow, I want to hear all about it when I get back home.

103. Don't forget your show at Maple Hills is in an hour.

104. - All right, love you, boys. - Love you, Dad.

105. - Love you. - Love you.

106. I'm proud to say That you're my buttercup

107. Of love

108. Oh, yeah

109. Give it up for my super talented brothers.

110. You're my rocks.

111. I love you, Preston.

112. I love you, Preston.

113. Can y'all hear us back there?

114. I still need a little bit more vocals in my monitor.

115. The bass is taking away from the vocals.

116. Hey, y'all need any help back there?

117. Any requests?

118. Mary, you want to hear something, sweetheart?

119. "Speedy Lamborghini."

120. "Speedy Lamborghini."

121. By the Four Squirrels?

122. How about we slow this next one down, Pat?

123. Speedy!

124. Speedy! Speedy!

125. Speedy! Speedy! Speedy!

126. Speedy! Speedy!

127. Okay, gentlemen, start your engines.

128. One, two...

129. I needed this.

130. Soaking with my boys.

131. Hey, room for one more?

132. You boys weren't lying. This feels fantastic.

133. I needed this.

134. Work has been something else lately.

135. I don't know if it's because we've got new sponsors

136. or what, but it feels like I've been putting out fires left and right.

137. Speaking of, let me...

138. I tell you, I've been working this job for 17 years now,

139. and I've never seen anything like this before.

140. I mean, you saw me this morning, I had to leave...

141. You ladies are the cat's meow.

142. You should come by my room after the show.

143. It's going to be a swinging time.

144. One, two. One, two, three, four.

145. Okay, back to work, people.

146. When's your next concert?

147. 4:00 p.m. Don't be late.

148. Great, I can catch the encore.

149. Dad!

150. I thought you boys would be hungry.

151. I'm famished.

152. They got us on liquids, Dad.

153. Wow, I'll make sure to have the fridge stocked

154. when we get back home.

155. You know, you gave us all quite a scare.

156. The boys and I have already made cards for Miguel and Raul.

157. That's great, boys, but—

158. And we promise to scrub the hell out of that hot tub

159. the moment we get home, Dad.

160. Every nook and cranny, Dad.

161. - Boys— - It will be different this time.

162. Listen.

163. The doctor told me

164. you were feeling symptoms after the first night.

165. What made you boys think it was a good idea

166. to get back in the hot tub?

167. That's the million-dollar question, isn't it?

168. You just had to have been there, Dad.

169. I've never felt closer to my brothers than in that hot tub.

170. He's not lying, Dad.

171. I felt it too.

172. I know how excited you boys were

173. to have your very own hot tub.

174. But sometimes, when you love something so badly,

175. it's hard to see its flaws.

176. I had Miguel test the water.

177. It's a miracle you boys are even alive.

178. I've already lost your mother.

179. I can't go through that again with you boys.

180. Oh, Goddamn it.

181. Dad, it's gonna be okay.

182. Because today,

183. I promise to start making healthier choices...

184. from here on out.

185. The same goes for me, Dad.

186. Me, three.

187. So, I'm afraid to ask.

188. I got rid of the hot tub.

189. But I want to show you boys something.

190. Yeah, I think I read somewhere that a baby's penis actually doesn't have

191. that many nerve endings.

192. Yeah, that actually makes a lot of sense.

193. All right, you convinced me.

194. I'll circumcise my boy's penis.

195. Wait, you mean to tell me you recorded that entire night?

196. All three hours and 50 minutes.

197. Now you boys can relive the magic of the hot tub...

198. whenever you please.

199. A circumcised penis is a cat's meow.

200. I don't even want to know.

201. - Hey, Dad? - Yeah?

202. Love you.

203. I love you, boys.