Haha, You Clowns 1x10

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Tristan gets immersed in a new hobby.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. It's coming up, it's coming up!

2. OMG, I know!

3. - The best part is coming up. - No! Right, right, right!

4. I know, right? It's, like, so good.

5. No!

6. And freeze!

7. Okay. You do realize you just ran over the Pope just now, right?

8. This is the best part. Yes, queen.

9. Do you need me to clean out your ears or something?

10. I said you just ran over the Pope.

11. The Pope? Never heard of him.

12. Selfie.

13. We're all going to hell because you just ran over the Pope.

14. And you wanna take a selfie?

15. Unless... Oh, God.

16. No, it can't be.

17. I'm in the car with Satan.

18. Looks like I gotta send Satan back to hell in a body bag.

19. Die, Satan, die!

20. And freeze.

21. Dye? You want dye?

22. You got it, hon.

23. So, what color are we thinking today?

24. We've got Sour Apple Sunrise,

25. Sassy Salsa Red,

26. or my personal favorite,

27. Grape Expectations.

28. "Sassy Salsa Red."

29. Now what did I do with that blow dryer? I swear, I keep losing that thing.

30. Here, I brought my own.

31. Never leave home without it.

32. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's not a thing.

33. Never leave home without it.

34. Hey, so what did you think?

35. Oh my God, your entire class had us in stitches.

36. Amazing job, Tristan.

37. My face hurts from laughing so much.

38. Your face hurts from laughing, Duncan?

39. Or could it be that giant blood-sucking leech on your face?

40. There you go, Dad.

41. You can stand to lose a couple pounds.

42. - Yeah, no, I'm pretty booked up. - Hey, Todd.

43. Todd, I had a blast out there.

44. Tristan, you're showing a lot of promise.

45. But remember, the mind is an altar.

46. Honor it, but never kneel to it.

47. Do you understand?

48. Thanks, Todd. What can I say? I learned from the best.

49. Well, you're just sweeter than sweet tea.

50. Hey, sweet talk me all you want,

51. but I'm still not giving you a driver's license.

52. I'm just dying to be a featured player in Todd's improv troupe.

53. How do you guys come up with this stuff so fast?

54. I know, it's like a magic trick.

55. I shall teach you, young grasshoppers.

56. All right, Mr. Miyagi,

57. I think that performance deserves a round of pizza.

58. Pizza? Me want sushi!

59. Greetings, sir.

60. Welcome to Tristan's Exotic Petting Zoo.

61. "Exotic Petting Zoo"?

62. You can pet a rare saber-tooth tiger.

63. That's not a saber-tooth tiger.

64. That's a tabby cat.

65. And freeze!

66. Okay, those are good instincts, Preston.

67. I had something funny planned with the saber-tooth tiger,

68. - but that's fine. - Oh, my bad.

69. You didn't know, but maybe instead of saying tabby,

70. say cocker spaniel.

71. In improv, you learn words beginning with C

72. are just funnier sounding.

73. Cocker.

74. What if I say cockapoo?

75. Like a mix between a cocker spaniel and a poodle?

76. Poodle's a funny word, too!

77. Just say cocker spaniel, Preston.

78. I've been taking improv for about a month now.

79. I think I know what I'm talking about.

80. Okay.

81. Great, thanks, Preston.

82. And... unfreeze.

83. Saber-tooth tiger?

84. I'm pretty sure that's a cocker spaniel.

85. Fido! Sic his nuts!

86. - What in the blazes? - What was that?

87. Looks like our cocker spaniel just went number one

88. on Jeanette's table. Bad boy!

89. Do you think you guys can play your games somewhere else?

90. And scene.

91. Sorry, Jeanette. That's on us.

92. Yeah, Tristan's giving us improv lessons.

93. I'd be careful, boys.

94. What, with improv?

95. I once lost a good friend to improv.

96. Wayne Brady.

97. - From Whose Line. - Wait, you know that guy?

98. He used to be the funniest person I knew.

99. Okay, that's amazing.

100. But the power of improv consumed him.

101. Everything became a bit.

102. - He couldn't shut it off. - For real?

103. And if you didn't laugh or play along,

104. he would lean into the bit harder and harder.

105. He alienated a lot of people in his life that way.

106. That must have been exhausting, Jeanette.

107. Wayne was creating so many funny scenarios in his mind

108. that he lost all touch with reality.

109. I think he still lives in LA somewhere.

110. No way.

111. I'm from LA, dude.

112. - I took the 10 to the 105 to the 99. - Two-sixty-six.

113. - Nah, dude. I took the 505... - To the 33.

114. - ... to the 105... - To the 88.

115. to the 605.

116. "Make sure your contributions on stage enhance the scene

117. and avoid causing discomfort for others."

118. Hey, Robin Williams.

119. It's family night at Big Tony's Putt-Putt. You in?

120. I've gotta know Todd's improv manual

121. backwards and forwards if I'm ever gonna be a featured player.

122. But...

123. Big Tony's got another thing coming to him, you see.

124. Yeah, yeah.

125. Big Tony ain't so tall.

126. - A wise guy, eh? - Yeah, wise guy, eh?

127. Come on, Mr. Campbell.

128. Nice comeback.

129. Thanks, girls.

130. I got robbed by that windmill back there.

131. You think you got robbed?

132. This fella bit my bloody arms off.

133. Crikey! Just look at the teeth on this beaut.

134. All right, put me down for three, Duncan.

135. Duncan?

136. Good job wrestling that gator, Tristan.

137. Bring it in here, fellas.

138. Here, you got some schmutz on your face.

139. Oh, yeah, you got some schmutz on your face, too.

140. Come on, guys. People are waiting.

141. Sorry about that, mate.

142. En garde, foul beast!

143. And I do mean foul,

144. 'cause you definitely need a breath mint.

145. Hey, who turned off the lights?

146. Coming to the rescue, my liege.

147. Aim for his face.

148. Oh, wait, that's his butt, actually.

149. Come on, guys, knock it off.

150. All right, I think he learned his lesson.

151. Learned his lesson?

152. This troll has a brain the size of a cashew, Preston.

153. "Size of a cashew." That's good, Tristan.

154. Yeah, I think it's safe to say I'll never look at a cashew the same.

155. "Size of a cashew"?

156. That's a good one, Preston.

157. Okay, that's the last time I let you guys book the B&B.

158. Tristan, move out of the way.

159. My horse is spooked, Dad.

160. I have no control.

161. - Fido, go fetch the ball. - Do what now?

162. You're my cocker spaniel, remember?

163. Bad doggy, bad!

164. Tristan, what's gotten into you?

165. What's gotten into me?

166. I'm not the one with the blood-sucking leech.

167. Oh, yeah, that's one giant leech, Tristan.

168. Yes, and?

169. Yes, and...

170. Check out Dracula.

171. He's probably thinking,

172. "Hey, Mr. Leech,

173. save some blood for me."

174. Too funny, Preston.

175. He's like... He's like, "Mm, blood."

176. Yeah, it's like Dracula wants to suck all of the blood.

177. Guys?

178. This isn't funny anymore.

179. - Oh my God. Is he okay? - Oh my God. Oh my God.

180. Tristan, what did you do?

181. What did you do to your brother, Tristan?

182. Oh, God, no.

183. - No, no, no. - Oh my God. I think he's dead.

184. The police are coming, Tristan.

185. - He's not breathing. - Get out of here. Run.

186. Oh, God damn it.

187. He's over here.

188. He's gone into the cave.

189. Surround him.

190. We just wanna talk.

191. Hey, stop! Freeze!

192. He's getting away!

193. Mom?

194. Hello, Tristan.

195. Todd?

196. Improv is like styling hair, hon.

197. You've got your mousse, you've got your gel,

198. you can chunk it, thin it, bleach, and dye.

199. The world is your salon, Tristan.

200. But if you snip here, and you snip there,

201. and you snip, snip, snip, snip, snip,

202. why, you're not gonna have much to work with now, will you?

203. And believe you me,

204. I know what that's like.

205. So, what do you think of your new do, cutie pie?

206. What do I think?

207. Forget improv, I'm getting into modeling.

208. Help! Help! Get me out of here! Get me out of here! Help!

209. Help!

210. Get me out of here!

211. Help!

212. Help!