Gravity Falls 2x18

1. Oh, it's happening!

2. It's finally,

3. finally happening.

4. Physical form?

5. Don't mind if I do!

6. Oh! What just happened?

7. Oh! Oh, man.

8. This is bad.

9. This is real bad.

10. Guys, we've got

11. a situation.

12. All right, listen up,

13. you one-life-spanned,

14. three-dimensional,

15. five-sensed

16. skin puppets.

17. For a trillion years,

18. I've been trapped

19. in my own decaying

20. dimension,

21. waiting for a new universe

22. to call my own.

23. Name's Bill, but you

24. can call me

25. your new lord and master

26. for all eternity.

27. Now meet the gang of

28. interdimensional criminals

29. and nightmares

30. I call my friends.

31. 8 Ball,

32. Kryptos,

33. The Being Whose Name

34. Must Never Be Said.

35. Ah, what the heck.

36. It's Zanthar.

37. Then of course,

38. there's also Teeth,

39. Keyhole, Hectorgon,

40. Amorphous Shape,

41. Aronica Pacifier and these guys.

42. This is our town

43. now, boys.

44. Now see here,

45. you unholy triangle fella.

46. As mayor, I strongly urge you

47. to get on outta here.

48. Yeah. Things with

49. one eye are weird.

50. We don't like

51. out-of-towners.

52. We punch what

53. we don't understand.

54. I would just like to say

55. that as a rich capitalist,

56. I welcome your

57. tyrannical rule.

58. Perhaps I can be

59. one of your, uh,

60. horsemen of

61. the apocalypse.

62. Dad!

63. Not now, sweetie.

64. The grownups are talking.

65. Oh, wow,

66. that's a great offer.

67. How about instead,

68. I shuffle the functions

69. of every hole

70. in your face?

71. Durland!

72. My precious Deputy Durland!

73. It's time we do

74. a little redecorating.

75. I could really use

76. a castle of some kind.

77. And how about some bubbles

78. of pure madness?

79. This party never stops.

80. Time is dead,

81. and meaning has no meaning.

82. Existence

83. is upside down,

84. and I reign supreme.

85. Welcome, one and all,

86. to Weirdmageddon.

87. So this is how

88. the world ends.

89. Not with a bang,

90. but with a... cuckoo.

91. - Weirdmageddon.

92. Move it, stretch!

93. Hey, we're

94. scampering here.

95. The rift is shattered.

96. Bill's world

97. is spilling into ours.

98. Every minute,

99. his powers grow stronger.

100. Mabel... the rift must have

101. cracked inside her backpack.

102. She must be in danger.

103. I have to go find her.

104. Mabel. Come in, Mabel.

105. Mabel!

106. Dipper, listen to me.

107. We can find

108. your sister soon,

109. but first, we have

110. to stop Bill.

111. If we can blast him back

112. through the rip he came out of,

113. we just might

114. be able to stop him

115. before his weirdness

116. spreads across the entire globe.

117. Are you sure defeating Bill

118. is even possible?

119. No, I'm not sure.

120. But being a hero

121. means fighting back

122. even when it seems

123. impossible.

124. - Will you follow me?

125. - To the ends of the earth.

126. Good, because

127. that's where we're heading.

128. You also might

129. want to step inside.

130. Weirdness wave!

131. Ah! Abuelita,

132. a tidal wave of madness

133. just went over us.

134. Oh, Soos,

135. such an imagination.

136. Ah!

137. You turned into

138. a chair!

139. Why don't you have

140. a seat and relax?

141. What about you,

142. and my friends?

143. I'll be fine.

144. You go help the others.

145. When the universe

146. is broken,

147. only one handyman

148. can fix it.

149. I'm coming for you,

150. friends.

151. Time for a nap.

152. Hey!

153. That's it, goat.

154. It's time I threw you

155. off this property for good!

156. On second thought,

157. I'm gonna run like a coward now.

158. Freedom, freedom!

159. Okay, inmates,

160. it's time to review

161. your finger paintings.

162. Good. Nice.

163. Gideon, does this look like

164. someone who's ready

165. to re-enter society?

166. Gideon's unappreciated

167. in his time.

168. Oh, Ghost Eyes,

169. you're making me blush.

170. Gideon makes prison

171. life worth living.

172. Gideon, Gideon...

173. Oh, my,

174. Bill came through.

175. Ready to cause

176. some havoc, boys?

177. Ah, my quantum

178. destabilizer.

179. Been waiting a long time

180. to use this.

181. We're only gonna have

182. one chance to take this shot.

183. Steady. Steady.

184. And...

185. I'm alive now.

186. Oh, no!

187. Well, well, well.

188. And here I thought today

189. couldn't get any better.

190. Great-uncle Ford!

191. Dipper, take my journals.

192. Listen. I know of

193. one other way to defeat Bill.

194. It's...

195. Oh, no, Dipper, run!

196. Get down!

197. Good old Six Fingers.

198. I've been waiting

199. an eternity

200. - to have a chat face to face.

201. Everyone, this Armageddon

202. wouldn't be possible

203. without help from

204. our friend here.

205. Give him

206. a six-fingered hand.

207. This brainiac is the one

208. who built the portal

209. in the first place.

210. Don't look

211. so sour, Fordsie.

212. It's not too late

213. to join me.

214. With that extra finger,

215. you'd fit right in

216. with my freaks.

217. I'll die before

218. I join you.

219. I know your weakness, Bill.

220. Oh, yeah?

221. And I know a riddle.

222. - Why did the old man do this?

223. - This?

224. Because I needed

225. a new back scratcher.

226. That's enough!

227. Hand over my uncle,

228. or else!

229. Now isn't this...

230. interesting?

231. My old puppet

232. is back for an encore.

233. You think

234. you can stop me?

235. Go ahead, Pine Tree,

236. show me what you got.

237. I...

238. Uh...

239. "I, um, I..."

240. Do it, kid.

241. Do some brilliant thing

242. that takes me down right now.

243. What do you got,

244. Pine Tree?

245. Everyone's waiting.

246. Do it!

247. Bill!

248. That's right.

249. Don't be a hero, kid.

250. This is what happens

251. to heroes in my world.

252. No! The journals!

253. Not much of

254. a threat now, are you?

255. Now can anyone remind me

256. why we came here?

257. To get weird!

258. That's right.

259. VIP party at the Fearamid.

260. Oh, and 8 Ball, Teeth,

261. you've earned a treat.

262. - Have the kid for a snack.

263. - Huh?

264. Hench maniacs,

265. roll out!

266. So you wanna eat him

267. or something?

268. Oh, definitely.

269. Let's eat him.

270. We're day three in

271. this strange cataclysmic event

272. which some are calling

273. Weirdmageddon,

274. or the Odd-pocalypse.

275. Weather today calls for

276. black clouds, blood rain,

277. and frequent showers

278. of eyeball bats

279. turning people

280. into stone.

281. I'm Shondra Jiminez,

282. and I ate a rat for dinner.

283. Mabel, it's me.

284. So far,

285. I've eluded capture,

286. but I haven't been able

287. to find you or Stan anywhere.

288. I don't know if

289. you can hear me,

290. but wherever you are,

291. whatever happens,

292. - I'm going to find you.

293. The mall! Maybe they're

294. hiding in there.

295. - Oh, no.

296. - Hey. Hey, you.

297. Hey, I wanna

298. talk to you.

299. I wanna talk to you about

300. going inside my mouth.

301. I think you wanna

302. get in here.

303. Hey, you! Hey,

304. I'm talkin' to you!

305. You don't have to make

306. a big deal outta this.

307. Hello. Hello!

308. Why are you

309. just ignoring me?

310. That's seriously rude

311. to just ignore

312. someone like that.

313. Stan! Mabel!

314. Maybe at least I can

315. get something to eat.

316. The last nachos

317. on Earth.

318. Help! The nachos

319. tricked me!

320. Dipper?

321. Wendy? Oh, no.

322. You've been transformed into

323. some sort of tree monster.

324. It's just camouflage.

325. My dad made me and my brothers

326. do apocalypse training

327. every year instead of

328. Christmas.

329. Guess it's sort of cool

330. their paranoia paid off.

331. Nice! Bat meat.

332. Let me get that for you.

333. Wendy, I'm so glad

334. to find you.

335. I thought everyone

336. I knew was gone.

337. Hey, hey, it's okay.

338. We have each other now.

339. And Toby Determined, who I

340. accidentally mistook for a monster.

341. This just in:

342. This arrow in my shoulder.

343. We shouldn't stay

344. out in the open for too long.

345. Let me show you

346. my hideout.

347. We were playing

348. Truth Or Dare in the cemetery

349. when it happened.

350. The eyeballs froze Nate, Lee, Tambry

351. and Thompson.

352. Robbie almost got away,

353. but had to pause to take a selfie.

354. What about you?

355. I was in a fight with

356. Mabel when it happened.

357. Uncle Ford asked me

358. to be his apprentice

359. after the summer was over.

360. But that would mean

361. I wouldn't go back home.

362. It would mean growing up

363. without Mabel.

364. Oh, dude.

365. Mabel didn't

366. take it well,

367. and she ran off

368. into the forest.

369. She couldn't even

370. look me in the eye.

371. Come on, let's get

372. some fresh air.

373. Toby, you watch the camp.

374. Don't call me Toby

375. anymore.

376. Call me Bodacious T.

377. No one will ever

378. call you that.

379. End of the world.

380. Man.

381. Those death metal

382. album covers

383. got it shockingly right.

384. You know, I used to think

385. I could get out of anything.

386. But this?

387. The journals are destroyed,

388. Ford is captured,

389. and I can't find

390. my family anywhere.

391. Bill said it himself.

392. There's no room

393. for heroes out here.

394. We lost.

395. Look, dude,

396. it's not over yet.

397. You've beaten Bill

398. twice before.

399. Why is this time

400. any different?

401. 'Cause then,

402. I had Mabel.

403. Then you need to get

404. Mabel back.

405. Look, this summer,

406. I've seen some amazing things,

407. but nothing as amazing

408. as you and your sister.

409. I don't know if

410. it's dumb luck,

411. or yin and yang

412. or whatever,

413. but when you two

414. work together,

415. there's nothing you two

416. can't accomplish.

417. You just need

418. to make up and team up,

419. and save the universe.

420. But how will

421. I ever find her?

422. The shooting star

423. from Mabel's sweater.

424. She's in there.

425. I know it.

426. Whoa, is that like

427. twin ESP?

428. No, we don't have that.

429. But we do have this thing

430. where our allergies

431. totally act up

432. at the same time.

433. Mabel needs us.

434. How are we gonna get out there

435. without being caught?

436. I have an idea.

437. Spin that person,

438. spin that person.

439. Spin that person.

440. Go nuts, guys.

441. When we're done partying,

442. I unveil phase two.

443. Open up.

444. This is the police.

445. Time police.

446. Just play it cool.

447. Ditch the time punch.

448. Let me do the talking.

449. Bill Cipher, you are

450. in violation

451. of the rules

452. of Spacetime,

453. and possessing the body

454. of a time officer.

455. My body is a temple.

456. How dare you?

457. Hear this, Cipher.

458. Ugh, Time Baby.

459. If your rip in this dimension

460. continues,

461. it could destroy

462. the very fabric of existence.

463. Surrender now

464. or face my tantrum.

465. Oh, no, a tantrum.

466. Whatever will I do

467. about that?

468. How about this?

469. - Aw, snap!

470. He just killed

471. Time Baby.

472. Oh, man, this has gone

473. from bad to worse.

474. I gotta get out of

475. Time Dodge.

476. Boss, the pine tree kid got

477. away before we could eat him.

478. Are you worried he might

479. try to cause some trouble?

480. Yeah, trouble with

481. Mabel's bubble?

482. Ha! I'm not worried.

483. I've got someone

484. on the case.

485. The abandoned auto mart.

486. Free cars,

487. ripe for the hot wiring.

488. We have found

489. our ride to Mabel.

490. Wonder if they

491. have a tank.

492. I always wanted

493. to drive a tank.

494. I can't believe

495. this place is just abandoned.

496. Oh, an air freshener.

497. Finally, I'll smell like

498. a person.

499. Stealy, stealy. Ah!

500. Huh, it's gonna take more

501. than one dart

502. to keep me...

503. Oh, no. Tony!

504. Was it Tony? I can never

505. remember his name.

506. Well, well, looks like

507. we got ourselves

508. a pair of

509. ground walkers.

510. Ha ha, ground walkers.

511. Ain't got no wheels.

512. Listen, discount

513. auto warriors.

514. We just wanna make it

515. to that bubble out east.

516. We have no quarrel

517. with you.

518. Oh, but that's

519. where you're wrong.

520. Hands where I can see 'em.

521. Y'all fellers ain't

522. goin' nowhere.

523. Y'all?

524. Fellers? Wait.

525. Gideon?

526. That's Sheriff Gideon.

527. Under the authority of

528. Bill Cipher,

529. I place you two

530. under arrest.

531. Hi, Wendy.

532. Have we formally met?

533. Ooh-wee.

534. Look who the apocalypse

535. dragged in.

536. Y'all are in

537. a 12-piece bucket

538. of deep fried

539. trouble now.

540. Ghost Eyes, spittoon.

541. It's Gideon.

542. And he's gotten

543. folksier.

544. My old pal Bill

545. figured you might try

546. to rescue Mabel,

547. so he appointed me

548. master of these wastelands,

549. and keeper of the bubble.

550. My sweet, precious Mabel's

551. trapped inside,

552. and I have the only key

553. wrapped around my...

554. well, I wouldn't

555. call it a neck exactly.

556. Wrapped around this little

557. pocket of fat under my head.

558. Gideon, you have no right

559. to keep her in there.

560. Bill explained it to me

561. nice and simple.

562. She was always

563. destined to be mine,

564. and now that I have her

565. in a cage,

566. she'll learn to love me.

567. I have an eternity to wait.

568. Ghost Eyes, ready to escort

569. our friends to Bill's dungeon?

570. No. Hey!

571. This isn't gonna

572. work, Gideon.

573. Oh? And why's that?

574. Because after I break

575. Ghost Eyes' arm,

576. and steal that key

577. from your neck,

578. I'm gonna wear your butt

579. on my foot

580. - like a rhinestone slipper.

581. And what makes you think

582. you can do all that?

583. 'Cause I'm a flippin'

584. Corduroy!

585. Ghost Eyes,

586. my hench angel.

587. Get back!

588. Get back, or I will

589. drop-kick him, I swear.

590. You'll never

591. get away with this, you hear me?

592. Guess what?

593. We already did.

594. Wendy, you're

595. the coolest person I know.

596. I know, dude.

597. Tell me about it later.

598. After them!

599. - You want your baby seat?

600. - Yes, please.

601. We are not letting them

602. get Mabel.

603. Discount Auto Mart warriors,

604. roll out!

605. Okay, all we have to do

606. is outrace Gideon's henchmen,

607. unlock the bubble,

608. save Mabel, save the world.

609. Quick question: did you ever get

610. your driver's license?

611. Definitely not.

612. Arm!

613. I can't let 'em

614. free Mabel.

615. Remind me why you're keeping

616. your girlfriend in a prison bubble again.

617. Have we, the prisoners,

618. become the wardens?

619. She loves me.

620. She just doesn't know it yet.

621. - Now quit the philosophy.

622. - Sorry. It was my major.

623. Ha! Weirdness bubble

624. blockin' the path.

625. Ooh-wee!

626. We got 'em now.

627. Watch it. Go around

628. that bubble field.

629. No way around.

630. Hold on! We're goin' through.

631. What's even in there?

632. That was horrible.

633. Here comes another one, dude.

634. Brace yourself!

635. Wendy, we're

636. almost there.

637. We just have

638. to make that jump.

639. Total lack of driver's training,

640. don't fail me now.

641. So close.

642. Mabel... I'm...

643. almost there.

644. Hey, Dipper.

645. How's it hangin'?

646. - Soos!

647. - Soos?

648. Handyman of the apocalypse,

649. at your service.

650. Soos, how'd you...

651. where'd you...

652. I've been wandering

653. the plains like a desperado,

654. helping strangers.

655. I guess there are

656. some folk songs about me now.

657. Let me see

658. what the damage is here.

659. The good news is,

660. your arm is okay.

661. What's the bad news?

662. Bad news is,

663. we're surrounded, dudes.

664. Ooh-wee!

665. I daresay you almost

666. had a jump on me

667. there for a second.

668. But this ain't

669. your Gravity Falls anymore.

670. Out here, I win.

671. Bill's hench bats

672. will be here any minute

673. to retrieve y'all.

674. Mabel's mine now!

675. Is she?

676. Well, yeah.

677. I have her trapped.

678. Ergo, Mabel is mine.

679. Gideon, listen to me.

680. If I've learned

681. anything this summer,

682. it's that you can't

683. force someone to love you.

684. The best you can do

685. is strive to be

686. someone worthy of loving.

687. Oh, I'm worthy

688. of lovin'.

689. These prisoners love me.

690. But Mabel doesn't,

691. because you're selfish.

692. But you can change.

693. Bill thinks there's

694. no heroes in this world,

695. but if we work together

696. and fight back,

697. we can defeat him.

698. You wanna be

699. Mabel's hero?

700. Stand up to Bill

701. and let us save her.

702. That's crazy.

703. You know what Bill would do

704. to me if that happens?

705. - You scared of Bill?

706. - No, I...

707. It's a complicated

708. situation.

709. Look inside, Gideon.

710. If all this

711. is for Mabel,

712. then ask yourself what Mabel

713. would want you to do.

714. Dipper, will you tell her

715. what I did?

716. Of course.

717. I hope you're right

718. about this.

719. Guys, new plan.

720. Bill's minions are gonna

721. be on us in seconds.

722. But I'm not gonna let

723. that dumb triangle

724. be the warden of me.

725. Y'all ready for a good,

726. old-fashioned prison brawl?

727. We're behind you

728. for life, brother.

729. Fighting children

730. is boring.

731. Fighting a chaos god

732. sounds fun.

733. Let's do this!

734. Henchmen, roll out!

735. Whew! And I thought I was

736. gonna have to throw down.

737. Okay. Remember, guys,

738. this is a prison bubble

739. designed by Bill.

740. We've gotta prepare ourselves

741. for what we find in here.

742. Whatever it is,

743. we'll do it together.

744. - For Mabel.

745. For Mabel.

746. Anybody wanna

747. get in my mouth?

748. I'm a big, hungry monster.

749. I'm a big, hungry

750. monster here.

751. I would really appreciate it

752. if someone...

753. You, ma'am,

754. you, ma'am,

755. - how would you

756. like to get in—

757. Anybod... hello!

758. Hey, sir, sir.

759. False alarm.

760. It's just a bird.

761. Not one person.

762. Not one person

763. has gotten in my mouth.

764. I don't care anymore.

765. I just...

766. I gotta call my mother.