Gossip Girl 5x6

1. Gossip Girl here.

2. Your one and only source

3. into the scandalous lives

4. of Manhattan's elite.

5. I want the movie rights to this book.

6. And since you're good friends with the author

7. that shouldn't be a problem.

8. Uh, we're not exactly on good terms right now.

9. 'I told Alessandra that I'm giving you the book rights.'

10. I do have one condition

11. I wanna write the screenplay.

12. What are those?

13. My late husband Bart had

14. his investigator research

15. our whole family.

16. There's a story in that safe.

17. I saw it myself.

18. I wanna return these to you.

19. And you're not gonna use them ever?

20. 'Anything of value in these was on Gossip Girl.'

21. "Dr. Eliza Barnes."

22. - You look like you wanna talk. - I do.

23. You never had a childhood, so you behave

24. like a child in the worst ways.

25. Your superficial connections

26. and lack of authentic emotion

27. leave you isolated and alone.

28. 'Throwing away your loyal family'

29. for a fiance you shouldn't trust.

30. You really believe she has no other secrets?

31. I would never lie to you, you know that.

32. I never know with you.

33. I have a problem I was hoping you could help me with.

34. I'd like to meet so I could tell you more in person.

35. 'I'm more than willing to pay for your time.'

36. Where has she been? Serena?

37. And who am I?

38. That's one secret I'll never tell.

39. You know you love me.

40. XOXO.

41. Gossip Girl.

42. They say the road of life

43. is long andwinding.

44. So it's important to mark

45. the milestones along your way.

46. From picking your bridesmaids..

47. So many minions.

48. 'How you ever going to decide?'

49. Tryouts begin after breakfast.

50. Alright, let's put the bar up front

51. the DJ in the back and the caterers

52. can set up in the bullpen when we toss out

53. those moving boxes.

54. Nate, can I add one more thing

55. to your to-do list?

56. Definitely.

57. To christening your boss's new desk.

58. Oh, my, ha ha.

59. Landing on your first

60. best-seller list.

61. Number nine.

62. "Inside" by Daniel Humphrey.

63. What did, uh, Lincoln Hawk's first single debut at?

64. Eight.

65. Uh, but don't pay too much attention to that stuff.

66. That was the '90s.

67. To finally asking for help.

68. So how are you feeling today?

69. Fit as a fiddle.

70. But keep your eyeson the road

71. Upper East Siders

72. or you could get lost along the way.

73. - That was a productive morning. - 'Yeah.'

74. I got a lot accomplished in a short amount of time.

75. - Didn't I? - Don't gloat.

76. If anyone deserves top marks, it's me.

77. - Hmm. - Now zip me up.

78. So, I was thinking about the party tonight

79. and I was thinking that maybe

80. you could be my date.

81. You're joking.

82. You're not?

83. I mean, isn't it time we finally told the world

84. we're a couple? I can't think of a better time than tonight.

85. I can't think of a worse one.

86. Tonight's the public launch of my new media empire.

87. I'm showing New York City who I am.

88. Besides, we both know that female bosses

89. can't mix business and pleasure

90. without people whispering about them behind their back.

91. Okay, but I'd still like you to meet a few of my friends.

92. I mean, can we at least talk about that?

93. Of course.

94. Right after you and Charlie deliver

95. the new Spectator tablets to all our VIP guests.

96. You even heard of, uh, a messenger service?

97. So some unattractive delivery guy can hand them

98. to an assistant who's just gonna sell them on eBay?

99. - I don't think so. - Ugh.

100. Here is your list.

101. Charlie?

102. I mean, seriously? This is, like, four pages long.

103. Don't pout.

104. Charlie, you are East Side.

105. Nate, you're West.

106. And I have to run

107. because I am late for a meeting

108. with an old friend from LA.

109. Hmm.

110. I knew I shouldn't have worn heels today.

111. The dream starts the same every time.

112. They have a habit of doing that.

113. I'm taking an early morning stroll

114. in my new Berluti wingtips.

115. I look up, and a block away is the most

116. magnificent skyscraper I've ever seen.

117. I have to get inside it.

118. But every time I round the corner..

119. it's still a block away.

120. So, what do you do?

121. I start to run, but as soon as I reach it—

122. You wake up.

123. What do you think the dream is about?

124. My father's tragic death?

125. My mother's secret life?

126. Or perhaps my chronic oral fixation.

127. I appreciate your sense of humor, Charles, but—

128. But you think it's just a defense mechanism

129. against intensive therapy.

130. Be honest. You know you're holding back.

131. How can you be so sure..

132. I'm hiding something?

133. Maybe I'm wrong,

134. but I feel there's a piece of the puzzle

135. still missing.

136. It's not your mother or your father.

137. There's someone you're not telling me about.

138. - Good morning, Blair. - Hmm.

139. Don't you just adore us?

140. Why do I feel like there's a request coming?

141. Not a request. A special dispensation.

142. - For what? - Scheming and manipulating.

143. Who do you work for?

144. Louis, can't you just turn a blind eye for..

145. let's say, 24 hours?

146. Blair..

147. All I'd be doing is spending the day

148. with my former minions.

149. Maybe some light waterboarding involved

150. but I've been so good for so long.

151. And once I'm Her Serene Highness of Monaco

152. all meddling will be prohibi.

153. Queen B need last hurrah.

154. Are you sure that's such a good idea?

155. Forgive me, I've just never understood

156. this Upper East Side tradition of yours.

157. I know.

158. And that's why we're perfect together.

159. You don't have the scheme gene like I do.

160. You don't get the itch.

161. Maybe it hormonal.

162. Darling, it's just one day.

163. Okay, I give up.

164. I'll look away.

165. But only until the party tonight.

166. That's more than enough time.

167. Commenced.

168. Don't worry, my love..

169. nobody will get hurt.

170. Not badly.

171. Hey, Dan's on his way up.

172. Serena, I want you to meet

173. a dear old friend of mine

174. 'Diana Payne.'

175. 'Serena.'

176. I think you came to a party at my house in Los Angeles

177. but I was indisposed.

178. So good to finally meet you.

179. So nice to meet you too.

180. Serena's my latest find.

181. A month ago her job was getting

182. my director three shots over ice.

183. Now I've got her optioning best-sellers for me.

184. I'm gonna go get a tart cherry juice

185. and call David O'Russell.

186. I'll be back in time for our meeting.

187. It's such a small world.

188. My good friend Nate Archibald actually works for you

189. and my cousin Charlie Rhodes.

190. Oh, yes.

191. Well, they've both been instrumental

192. in helping me rebrand The Spectator.

193. I hope you'll be coming to our lunch party tonight.

194. Oh, no, I wasn't planning on it.

195. Oh, but you should.

196. In fact, someone like you

197. with your influence, should have

198. her own place to speak her mind.

199. Have you ever thought about blogging for a website?

200. I know my readers would love to hear

201. every detail about your life.

202. Oh, there's already somebody

203. who's all over that.

204. I'm... not really a fan of her work.

205. Gossip Girl doesn't have the monopoly

206. on Serena van der Woodsen, does she?

207. No, but I've been hurt enough by what she's said that

208. I could never willingly take part in something like that.

209. I hope you'll come to the party, anyway.

210. It'd be great to keep talking.

211. As faithful minions through the years

212. you've each earned a chance to be immortalized

213. as a bridesmaid in my royal wedding.

214. But legally I must warn you

215. not everyone will survive tryouts.

216. So, I've drafted a waiver for you to sign

217. in the event of a catastrophe.

218. Kati, Penelope.

219. Nice to see Constance so ably represented.

220. Jessica, Columbia's finest.

221. Blair, it's always been my dream to be your bridesmaid.

222. Do yourself a favor and stop talking right now.

223. Even Pippa knew when to pipe down.

224. Where's Nelly Yuki?

225. Yale. Where she got in and you didn't.

226. Plus, she hates you, remember?

227. Well, an odd number just won't do.

228. We need another contestant.

229. - Charlie. - Heh.

230. You're the maid of honor's cousin.

231. You should be in the mix too.

232. 'What are you doing right now?'

233. - Nothing? - Then get in line, if you dare.

234. Hello, doctor.

235. What's this?

236. The rest of what I owe you.

237. I told you it'd be worth your while.

238. Now you can settle all of your father's debts.

239. What do you want me to do?

240. Just make sure my fiance

241. will never fall for him again.

242. Louis, that's up to Blair.

243. No... it's up to you.

244. Turn Chuck back into the monster

245. he was for the first

246. 20 years of his life.

247. He's a time bomb.

248. Find his fuse and light it.

249. Looks like Louis is about to make

250. young Bass' road to recovery

251. a very bumpy ride.

252. Better buckle up, Chuck.

253. Dr. Barnes, what are you doing here?

254. A house call is a little out of the ordinary

255. in my line of work, but I felt our last interaction

256. ended too abruptly. May-may I sit?

257. Of course.

258. I was hoping... that being

259. in your environment might help.

260. Well, I applaud your persistence, Dr. Barnes

261. but I've searched the far corners of my mind

262. and I'm not hiding anything

263. from you or myself. I'm an open book.

264. Then let's skip to the chapter about Blair Waldorf.

265. I live in this city, I read the papers

266. just like everyone else.

267. You've done your homework, but

268. I don't see how my history with Blair

269. or the tabloid fodder it produces

270. is really relevant to my therapy.

271. It's relevant if Blair is the source of your suffering.

272. Aren't you upset that the love of your life

273. is marrying someone else?

274. I let Blair go. Let's leave it at that.

275. You're actually telling me you're not furious?

276. Next chapter.

277. Have you ever thought it's your denial

278. of these feelings that's giving you nightmares?

279. Expressing your rage and anger

280. is part of your healing process.

281. You can't move on until you let it out.

282. You have to face that you didn't let Blair go

283. you lost her to someone else.

284. You don't know what I did.

285. But, yes..

286. maybe there is something else

287. I need to do if I'm ever going to move on.

288. I don't wanna lie to you. I don't wanna lie to myself.

289. If I ever really let Blair go..

290. I don't need this anymore.

291. It's beautiful.

292. I bought it to give to her.

293. I've been keeping hold of it ever since.

294. When really what I should do is just return it.

295. If that's what you need to do, you should do it.

296. You take it, just..

297. give it to charity or something, I don't care.

298. Just, just, just take it away.

299. Thank you.

300. So, Mr. Screenwriter

301. are you ready for your first ever development meeting?

302. I think so, as long as you guys don't wanna change the ending

303. or the beginning, or all the stuff in the middle.

304. Don't worry

305. you'll love working with Jane.

306. Ah, there he is.

307. Whoa, hey.

308. We're so excited.

309. Dan, this is Natalie

310. my exec at Warners.

311. - Hi, so nice to— - I love, love, love your book.

312. The characters, the voice, everything.

313. Honestly, you should just transfer the novel straight

314. to Final Draft. Copy, paste, done.

315. Wow, thank you.

316. So you don't have any notes before I start writing?

317. Well, we'd love if you could open up

318. the world of the Upper East Side a little bit more.

319. 'Rich people are so hard to like.'

320. Maybe you could add someone more relatable?

321. I, heh... I thought I did that already.

322. I-I think Dan is referring to his main character

323. Dylan Hunter. He'll appeal to everyone.

324. He starts off as an innocent from Brooklyn.

325. Who quotes Hawthorne and screens Fellini films?

326. I don't think so.

327. We need a real outsider as a hero.

328. A tragic back-story would give him more to overcome.

329. - Maybe he's an orphan. - Wait..

330. Now another thought that occurred to me

331. was to "Glee" this up.

332. You know, music.

333. - Originals or covers. - Okay, stop. What's going on?

334. I thought we were talking about turning

335. this into an important independent film.

336. Dan, relax, we're just talking.

337. About turning my book into Newsies.

338. Inside is my life, and thank you so much

339. but I don't need anyone to tell me how to write it.

340. A royal wedding is more than

341. just the most glamorous event

342. on the social calendar.

343. It is also the most dangerous.

344. People will try to kidnap you

345. and break you for the details.

346. Paparazzi will tap your phones.

347. I need to know who of you

348. is going to crack under the pressure.

349. 'The contest today will simulate'

350. how you'd perform your bridesmaids duties

351. under extreme duress.

352. Now fall in line!

353. Dressing me for my wedding day means

354. attending to my every need

355. no matter how big or small.

356. Adjust for reception, cinch that train.

357. Penelope?

358. - She has to pee! - Okay.

359. Where's secret wedding location?

360. - We don't know. - Who designed Miss Blair's—

361. - We can't tell you that! - Good one, Jessica.

362. Now block that baby bump!

363. - Blocking. - 'What baby bump?'

364. Let's go, girls. Faster.

365. Who wants it? You know the rules.

366. You trip, you're out.

367. You spill, you're out.

368. - Whoa. Oh. - Come on.

369. Nice work, Charlie. I like what I see.

370. I'm sorry, I..

371. You sicken me.

372. May I help you?

373. Yeah. I work for Diana Payne.

374. She wanted me to hand-deliver Keith Gessen

375. the new Spectator tablet.

376. It'll serve as his invitation for the party tonight.

377. Keith doesn't need an invitation

378. since he'll be attending with Diana.

379. Uh, but I'll gladly take the tablet myself.

380. Wait, so he's going as her date?

381. Hello, uh, they've been going out

382. for two months.

383. I thought you worked in media.

384. Hey.

385. I know this morning

386. was a total disaster

387. but nobody blames you.

388. Whatever Jane sent you here to say

389. why don't you just say it?

390. Well, we both think that you should

391. waive your right to write the script.

392. Why would I do that?

393. Because if you write it

394. your project will be stuck

395. in development hell.

396. You'll write a draft, a year later

397. you'll still be rewriting it

398. and you'll never give them what they want

399. because you're too close to it.

400. And that's not even the point.

401. Well, it sounds like it was.

402. Dan, you're a huge novelist now.

403. I don't know about huge. I mean, I'm-I'm number nine.

404. And next week you'll be number one.

405. I'll take two. I'm not greedy.

406. Seriously.

407. You should be focusing on your next best-seller.

408. Let us hire an A-list writer like, like an Akiva Goldsman

409. somebody who Jane can't bully

410. somebody who gets great movies made

411. and who'll honor your book faithfully.

412. You think you could get somebody like him to write it?

413. Absolutely! Jane works with Oscar winners all the time.

414. But how can I guarantee

415. that she's not just gonna screw it up?

416. Because I won't let her.

417. She may not know this world, but I do.

418. And I will protect your story and you.

419. Careful, S.

420. - I have your word? - You have my word.

421. Everybody knows the road to hell

422. is paved with good intentions

423. and shady bosses.

424. - 'Hello?' - Hey.

425. There you are. Why aren't you back here yet?

426. I got a little hung up at Keith Gessen's office.

427. Were you ever even gonna tell me

428. that you're bringing him as your date tonight?

429. Of course.

430. I wanted to say something this morning, but, um—

431. But you were busy lecturing me

432. on how you can't mix business with pleasure, but, hey—

433. Keith's just business, really. You are both.

434. But no one can know that I am.

435. 'Not right now.'

436. I know you don't understand

437. but you need to trust me.

438. No, you know what I need to do

439. is rethink this whole relationship.

440. Get me Charlie Rhodes.

441. Okay, Dan's off the project.

442. Take a bow, Serena.

443. You're a star.

444. How'd you accomplish it?

445. I just convinced him

446. that-that he and his novel

447. would be better served

448. by a top-tier screenwriter.

449. And he will be.

450. Sorkin's agent called right after you left.

451. Aaron Sorkin?

452. Is adapting "Inside."

453. Oh, my Go.. What?

454. That's, that's incredible!

455. How did you get that to happen so fast?

456. I had Sorkin lined up for a week.

457. His agent and I were just waiting.

458. For me to convince Dan to quit?

459. So this explains your "Inside, The Musical" pitch.

460. Come on! I always knew that Dan wasn't going to work out.

461. 'I just gave him a little nudge.'

462. Be happy, Sorkin is a good thing.

463. I just wish we could have spared everyone the drama this morning.

464. Are you kidding?

465. Dan coming in this morning

466. did more for this project

467. than you'll ever know.

468. Why?

469. Because we got to see

470. what this movie should really be.

471. A self-important teenager

472. who betrays his friends for fame and fortune.

473. "Inside" will be the next "Social Network."

474. We're gonna Zuckerberg him.

475. Jane, this, this isn't fair.

476. I prefer to let the audience decide what's fair or not.

477. Dan is not like that.

478. Why don't I put a dinner on the books for all of us

479. and this way you'll see?

480. The next time I see Dan will be at Cannes

481. when I'm shaking his grateful hand on the dais.

482. I have a call to make.

483. See you at the party tonight?

484. Congratulations, girls, you've survived the most physically

485. and mentally challenging day of your lives.

486. And all you have to show for it are a few bruises.

487. 'Now, for the final round'

488. you will be accompanying me and my prince

489. to the fabulous "Spectator" launch party tonight.

490. We're going to play a little game

491. with one of the guests there.

492. Well, who's the target?

493. - A boy, of course. - I'm listening.

494. At the wedding, you'll be the apple

495. of every bachelor's eye.

496. So I need to know

497. who is going to bag a baron

498. and who's going to embarrass me.

499. - With a busboy? - Exactly.

500. So tonight

501. whoever's the first to get a kiss

502. from one of New York's most eligible bachelors..

503. '... wins the right to call herself'

504. my royal bridesmaid.

505. So tell us, who is it?

506. Dorota..

507. will you do the honors?

508. Nate Archibald.

509. I am so all over this.

510. - Yes. Oh, my God. - Yes!

511. 'This is the best day of my life.'

512. Hello?

513. Why is Nate calling me

514. from Keith Gessen's office?

515. 'All I asked you to do was make'

516. 'a few simple deliveries'

517. 'for a few specific people'

518. and you botched it!

519. I know, I'm so sorry

520. but Blair's having a competition

521. to pick her bridesmaids.

522. And if I win, I can cover the royal wedding

523. for "The Spectator."

524. Then you better win, for your sake.

525. I just have

526. one more task to complete.

527. - Hey. - Hey, are you free tonight?

528. Jane was-was hoping that you would be my guest

529. to "The Spectator" party.

530. Let me guess, Jane loves me again

531. now that I quit the movie.

532. I think she just wants

533. to get to know you better.

534. The real you.

535. 'So be super nice, okay?'

536. I'm always nice.

537. Yeah, I'll-I'll see you tonight.

538. Spotted, S trying

539. to navigate a slippery slope

540. but she's not the only accident waiting to happen.

541. Hey, did you get my text?

542. Oh, I turned my phone off, actually.

543. Are you okay?

544. I'm, uh... I'm good.

545. He says, teeth clenched.

546. Come on, let me help.

547. I'm really good with other people's problems..

548. not so much my own, but..

549. Well, there's this there's this girl..

550. and I asked her to be my date

551. to the party tonight.

552. And she said no?

553. Which was fine..

554. until I find out that she's bringing another guy.

555. Do you think that she's trying

556. to let you down easy?

557. Easy's not her style. No.

558. Well, then she's trying to make you jealous.

559. Trust me, Nate, we're all the same.

560. Okay, so, what do I do?

561. Fight fire with fire.

562. Take me as your date.

563. Well, no, I wouldn't wanna, I wouldn't wanna ruin your night.

564. You won't.

565. Pick me up at six.

566. Whoo, you're getting, you're getting excited, aren't you?

567. You're getting excited. Come on.

568. Dr. Barnes.

569. You shouldn't be here.

570. And I wouldn't be if you answered any of my calls.

571. I told you I'm done.

572. I can't be responsible

573. for destroying a young man

574. who's doing everything he can

575. to heal himself.

576. 'And what about our deal?'

577. As much as it would have helped

578. here's your refund.

579. At the tone, please record your message.

580. Dr. Barnes, it's Chuck.

581. I think I'm in trouble. Can you meet me tonight?

582. When you drive Chuck over the edge

583. it's you who will wind up roadkill.

584. - So how was your day? - Hm, just what I needed.

585. Old habits die hard.

586. Hello.

587. If they die at all.

588. What are they doing here?

589. I thought we agreed we'd be done by tonight.

590. And I will be, my dear.

591. The girls just have one more

592. tiny, little thing to take care of.

593. You won't even notice they're here.

594. Where's Nate?

595. Where's Charlie?

596. Game on.

597. You look amazing.

598. I wanted offer my sincerest congratulations. Chuck Bass.

599. Diana Payne. So nice to meet you.

600. I've heard a lot about you and let me just say..

601. the best of it does you no justice.

602. Oh.

603. I'm sorry, have we met before?

604. Not that I can recall.

605. Uh, it's funny, just looking at you now I could've sworn—

606. I think I'd remember.

607. Enjoy the party.

608. Chuck.

609. Your Highness, always a pleasure.

610. Give it a rest, Bass.

611. I'm sorry, my friend's here.

612. - Dan. - Jane, hey.

613. Thank you so much for inviting me.

614. - I appreciate it. - Of course.

615. I'm just so happy you could make it.

616. Serena, look, I found Dan.

617. Did you already tell him we got Sorkin

618. to write the movie?

619. - What? No. That's incredible. - I know.

620. Now your character will talk even faster than you do.

621. You-you mind if I call my agent and tell her?

622. I'll be right back.

623. Don't think I don't know what you're doing

624. by bringing him here.

625. You can't guilt-trip me into changing my mind

626. about the lead character.

627. I just wanted you to get to know the real Dan.

628. He-he's genuine and caring and funny—

629. The Zuckerberg version is the better story.

630. The better movie.

631. I gave Dan my word that I would protect him.

632. He's one of my best friends.

633. Please, don't do this to him.

634. It's already done.

635. And you know what?

636. I'm taking you off this project

637. effective immediately.

638. Like Dan, you're just too close to it.

639. Nate, these offices are so big.

640. You have to show me yours.

641. Oh, I'd love to. Yeah, we got a lot of—

642. Ah, there you are.

643. I was waiting for you at the bar.

644. Well, you'll have to keep waiting.

645. Nate just promised me a tour.

646. Oh, of the office? I'll come with.

647. No, I wanna see your "Spectator"

648. not hers. Sorry, Charlie.

649. Ooh, is that a Hellman-Chang table?

650. Oh, my!

651. Serena, you came after all.

652. I'm delighted.

653. So what do you think of "The Spectator?"

654. Everyone seems to be having fun.

655. - Except for you. - Well..

656. What? I can't help but pry.

657. Of course, you don't have to tell me.

658. I just... got myself into a situation

659. that's gonna hurt somebody I really care about.

660. I thought I could fix it tonight

661. but I, I can't.

662. Maybe I can.

663. I'm quite the problem solver.

664. I don't think you wanna know.

665. - It involves a friend of yours. - Jane?

666. Now you have to tell me.

667. It's... it's about the book option I got for her.

668. I need to kill the project.

669. Give me two seconds and it'll vanish.

670. Thank you, but, but I'll, I'll figure it out on my own.

671. You just said you couldn't.

672. Jane and I have history.

673. She doesn't always like to be reminded of it

674. and it's been a while since I did.

675. What kind of history?

676. Some things are best left to the imagination.

677. So how bad do you want your problem to go away?

678. - Jane? - Yes?

679. A word.

680. Oh, just kiss him and win already.

681. Anybody with eyes can see Nate has a huge crush on you.

682. I give up.

683. I would, but I'm starting to feel

684. like I'm not Nate's type.

685. Hello, Nate doesn't have a type.

686. He's like Derek Jeter.

687. 'Well, when he saw you'

688. he said that you were the hottest girl

689. at Constance.

690. Nate said that?

691. Oh, my God, what else did Nate say?

692. Something about how

693. you were the only girl at Constance

694. he wished that he had hooked up with

695. but never did.

696. Until now.

697. Thanks, man, I appreciate that. It was just a..

698. - Let's do this. - Whoa!

699. Penelope, what did I tell you

700. about consorting with the help?

701. You're dismissed!

702. What? It's not my fault she tripped.

703. - Hey, uh, you leaving already? - I'm sorry, I have to go.

704. I was hoping we could talk more about the movie.

705. What movie? It's dead.

706. If you want to know why, talk to your friend, Serena.

707. I know the night's still young

708. and the bar's still open

709. but I wanted to take a moment

710. to thank everybody for coming.

711. It means so much to me

712. to know that if a bomb went off right this second

713. New York media would be over.

714. - Hey, thanks for being my date. - Of course.

715. I just hope we were able to make whoever you're seeing jealous.

716. I don't know, I don't even think she really cared.

717. Let's make her care.

718. - I'm game if you are. - Yeah?

719. 'We are going to be different'

720. 'from Gossip Girl'

721. 'and other anonymous sites'

722. which traffic in damaging rumors and innuendo.

723. Well, uh, I'm sorry. Where was I?

724. 'Um, "The Spectator" is only going to print facts.'

725. 'If you did it..'

726. '... you deserve to get caught.'

727. And we're gonna catch you.

728. 'So with apologies'

729. to my other esteemed editors

730. starting tonight

731. I'm gonna be poaching your best reporters

732. and stealing all your best stories.

733. I have a story for you.

734. So let's hear it, Mr. Bass.

735. My therapist, Dr. Eliza Barnes

736. 'has been using hypnosis'

737. to coerce me into performing..

738. unspeakable acts.

739. I am Dr. Barnes

740. and I promise you that none of this is true.

741. It's okay, Chuck.

742. You're in a very vulnerable

743. psychological state right now.

744. I wonder why.

745. Maybe because I just found out..

746. you were taking money

747. to reveal confidential

748. information about me.

749. Now that's a story I can print

750. if you have proof.

751. Uh, Chuck, stop.

752. Why are you doing this?

753. If you don't believe me..

754. you should ask your fiance.

755. He's the one who paid her.

756. Don't worry, B.

757. You're still marrying a prince..

758. of fools.

759. Blair, wait.

760. Please, I know how upset you must be.

761. After all this arguing about my scheming

762. what you've been doing is even worse.

763. But I can explain.

764. What possible explanation

765. could you have for..

766. paying Chuck's therapist to spy on him?

767. I found the paternity test.

768. The one that you'd torn into pieces.

769. Oh, my God.

770. You didn't tell me

771. you weren't sure who the father was.

772. Well, ugh..

773. I had to get the test.

774. Yeah, so you could decide who to be with?

775. No.

776. So we both could have

777. peace of mind knowing that what I prayed for

778. in my heart was true.

779. The paternity test showed me

780. that some part of you thought

781. you might still have a choice to make.

782. And I needed you to see that Chuck

783. will always be the wrong one.

784. Louis..

785. I don't know how many more times I can say this.

786. But Chuck and I can never work.

787. You know that for certain?

788. I do.

789. So does he.

790. And so should you.

791. Chuck destroys everything

792. and everybody in his life

793. and he'll never change.

794. But what's scaring me is that..

795. you're changing into him.

796. Did you just kill my movie?

797. Only because I had no other choice.

798. But I did it for you.

799. - For me? Are you kidding? - Listen, please.

800. Tell me one thing.

801. Was this your plan from the very beginning?

802. - What? - Admit it.

803. You hate your character in the book so much

804. you couldn't stand to see this made into a movie.

805. Millions of people might judge you

806. and we all know how much you like that.

807. Actually, for the record, having the project killed

808. had nothing to do with my image

809. and everything to do with yours.

810. Jane was gonna do a hatchet job on you.

811. And now I'm gonna get fired

812. for stopping her.

813. - That was fun. - More fun than you expected?

814. A lot more, I mean, maybe we should just stage

815. another make-out session later, you know, just for us.

816. Congratulations.

817. Looks like you won Blair's contest.

818. Wait, what? What is she talking about?

819. Oh, didn't you know?

820. This was all a game.

821. Charlie kissed you so she could

822. be one of Blair's bridesmaids.

823. For "The Spectator," of course.

824. Oh, guess she left

825. that part out.

826. Nate, I'm sorry.

827. Oh, don't fret, Charlie.

828. I'm sure Nate wasn't completely honest with you either.

829. Were you, honey?

830. Right, then. I better get back to my real date.

831. Keep up the good work, Charlie.

832. Cheers.

833. What, so you used me to get a story?

834. The girl you're seeing is our boss!

835. Well, if it isn't

836. the good doctor.

837. I thought you should know I'm gonna shut down my practice.

838. Why?

839. I know people say therapy's a waste of time

840. but you did wonders with my trust issues.

841. I understand you're angry.

842. I don't expect you to ever forgive me.

843. I just thought you should know

844. Louis wasn't paying me for information alone.

845. He wanted me to drive you into a rage.

846. To turn you into this monster

847. you apparently used to be.

848. Louis is so threatened by you

849. that he wanted to remind Blair..

850. Why she chose him.

851. Maybe Louis is right.

852. He doesn't have to be.

853. You can change.

854. Do you remember this morning when I asked you about Blair?

855. I was trying to provoke you.

856. But you chose something else.

857. Something better.

858. You chose to let go.

859. Continue down that road and I bet you'll find some peace.

860. I've always wondered what that felt like.

861. Good luck.

862. And I'm sorry.

863. I really did want to help.

864. Spotted.

865. Chuck Bass standing

866. at the crossroads.

867. Looks like we are gonna have to watch his every step.

868. Serena.

869. Word on the street is you're back on the job market.

870. You don't waste any time, do you?

871. Not when I know what I want.

872. There must be some way I can convince you

873. to write a blog for "The Spectator."

874. Not if it's about the Upper East Side

875. or anyone who lives there, including me.

876. I'm sorry.

877. I know that I owe you a favor

878. but I don't wanna be

879. the next Gossip Girl.

880. I don't believe in attacking

881. people online and spreading rumors.

882. Neither do I.

883. Which is why I wanna take Gossip Girl down.

884. How?

885. Everyone reads her.

886. And whether they admit it or not everyone posts.

887. This city is addicted to her.

888. Only because she writes about people like you.

889. Think about it.

890. If you and your friends are the

891. main reason people care about

892. Gossip Girl

893. and starting tomorrow

894. everyone can read about you

895. straight from the source

896. that would make Gossip Girl irrelevant, wouldn't it?

897. I don't know.

898. Yes, you do.

899. Serena, this is a chance

900. to have your own voice.

901. To stop the lies

902. and to finally control

903. your own image.

904. Aren't you tired of swimming

905. in Gossip Girl's fish bowl?

906. Well, I'd have to do it my own way.

907. I'd expect nothing less.

908. Come by tomorrow and we'll brainstorm together.

909. Okay.

910. - Goodnight. - Goodnight.

911. No more games, no more secrets.

912. Either we're in this for the world to see

913. or we end this right here.

914. Somebody here to apologize.

915. Well, I can't say I wanna hear it right now, but..

916. tell Louis I'll see him upstairs.

917. It's not Louis.

918. What are you doing here?

919. I-I don't have the energy to rehash tonight's hysterics.

920. I think you should leave.

921. I'm not here to apologize

922. about what happened tonight.

923. Then... what are you here to apologize for?

924. Everything else.

925. I'm sorry for losing my temper

926. the night you told me

927. Louis proposed to you.

928. I'm sorry for not waiting longer

929. at the Empire State Building.

930. I'm sorry for treating you like property.

931. I'm sorry..

932. I didn't tell you I loved you

933. when I knew I did.

934. But most of all, I'm sorry that I gave up on us..

935. when you never did.

936. Thank you.

937. I hope never giving up on people

938. isn't gonna be my downfall.

939. It's why you're going to be an amazing mother.

940. You're always there for the people you love..

941. even when they don't deserve it.

942. You know that's never gonna change.

943. It's okay if it has to.

944. Starting tonight, I'm going to take care of myself.

945. Is that all?

946. Yeah.

947. They say every road

948. comes toan end

949. but sometimes the end

950. feels just like the beginning.

951. Even when you think you've come a long way.

952. Dad... what are you still doing here?

953. Hmm.

954. After I talked to you at the party

955. Jonathan Karp called.

956. He got an advance copy of next week's best-seller list.

957. I'm not number one.

958. Did I go up at all?

959. You dropped off the list.

960. But when I told him the news about Aaron Sorkin

961. he said a big movie deal announcement

962. like that will have the books flying

963. off the shelves again.

964. The movie's dead, Dad. It's over.

965. I'm, I'm done.

966. You can suddenly find

967. yourself right back where you started.

968. Because every journey is

969. fraught with twists and turns.

970. You know, Charlie, you're becoming

971. more trouble than you're worth.

972. I had no idea

973. you were the one Nate was trying to make jealous.

974. I just wanted to

975. get the inside scoop on Blair's wedding.

976. Well..

977. now you know and so does the rest of the world.

978. Nate's mine.

979. Do I make myself clear?

980. Good.

981. Because I'd hate to have to run a story

982. tomorrow about a poor girl from Florida

983. who Clark Rockefellered the Upper East Side.

984. And one false step

985. could spell disaster.

986. But no matter what..

987. you still have to stay the course

988. and forge your own path.

989. No, Louis, I-I know you're sorry.

990. You should go on your trip.

991. We can talk when you get back.

992. Promise.

993. Besides, a few days apart would be good for us.

994. Because there's no going backnow.

995. And it looks like thisone's going

996. to be the ride of our lives.

997. X-O-X-O, Gossip Girl.