1. Gossip Girl here.Copy !req
2. Your one and only sourceCopy !req
3. into the scandalous livesCopy !req
4. of Manhattan's elite.Copy !req
5. 'They needed a family member'Copy !req
6. for a blood transfusionCopy !req
7. and I gave the doctors
Jack's number.Copy !req
8. Jack?Copy !req
9. I told Chuck he doesn't
have my heart anymore.Copy !req
10. I realized it belongs
to someone else.Copy !req
11. I've always hesitated
going afterCopy !req
12. Lola's father for child support.Copy !req
13. - Do you know who he is?
- I'm looking right at him.Copy !req
14. It's time to pass
the Gossip Girl baton.Copy !req
15. Now be a doll
and send this for me.Copy !req
16. There's stuff on this laptop
that'll blow people's minds.Copy !req
17. Why did you introduce
this girl as your daughter?Copy !req
18. - Who is she?
- Ivy Dickens.Copy !req
19. Your mom hired me to be you.Copy !req
20. "As for the rest of my estatesCopy !req
21. I leave to you, Ivy Dickens."Copy !req
22. I think it'd be best
if you left.Copy !req
23. I was just gonna say
the same thing.Copy !req
24. This is my apartment now.Copy !req
25. Where has she been, Serena?Copy !req
26. And who am I?Copy !req
27. That's a secret
I'll never tell.Copy !req
28. You know you love me.Copy !req
29. XOXO.
Gossip Girl.Copy !req
30. Dear "S by S" readersCopy !req
31. it looks like spring
has finally sprungCopy !req
32. and lucky for us,
one thing that hasn'tCopy !req
33. yet popped up
is Gossip Girl.Copy !req
34. Hopefully my family's
unfortunate exile to BrooklynCopy !req
35. will pass quietly
and with dignity.Copy !req
36. Oh..Copy !req
37. What's wrong?Copy !req
38. I'm perfect as usual.Copy !req
39. We've been waiting weeks, so..Copy !req
40. Blair.Copy !req
41. Oh! Oh, God.Copy !req
42. 'Oh.'Copy !req
43. I thought you said they were
having breakfast with William.Copy !req
44. Yes. Here.Copy !req
45. You're welcome to join us.Copy !req
46. How could I say no?Copy !req
47. If I had known
this was what you meantCopy !req
48. when you invited me
for a corporate retreatCopy !req
49. I might have packed differently.Copy !req
50. You didn't need clothes
for mistress Katya'sCopy !req
51. blindfolded trust exerciseCopy !req
52. but I would wear
something more suitableCopy !req
53. when I thank you officially
for saving my life.Copy !req
54. What, from that arsonist,
Russell Thorpe?Copy !req
55. That was a year ago.
Took you long enough.Copy !req
56. No, no, no, I'm referring
to the car accidentCopy !req
57. your blood donation,
after my body rejectedCopy !req
58. the first transfusion,
and I needed the family member.Copy !req
59. Oh. That.Copy !req
60. Well, I wouldn't be here
without you.Copy !req
61. I'm eternally grateful.Copy !req
62. Yeah, well, I considered
letting you dieCopy !req
63. and taking your billions.Copy !req
64. That's probably why you let meCopy !req
65. have all the hot ones
last night.Copy !req
66. My first gift.
My second... is a bit larger.Copy !req
67. I've endowed a new wingCopy !req
68. at the hospital
where I was treated.Copy !req
69. It's going to be
the Jack Bass pavilion.Copy !req
70. Tonight is the ribbon cutting
ceremony for the renovation.Copy !req
71. Seriously?
You're not just tryingCopy !req
72. to get me to the hospital
to put me in rehab?Copy !req
73. No, but that said,
you might wannaCopy !req
74. get rid of some of the evidence
of last night's exploitsCopy !req
75. before we go.Copy !req
76. I'll sleep it off..Copy !req
77. with... you and you.Copy !req
78. Come on.Copy !req
79. Hm. Well, I may have made
a few too many wafflesCopy !req
80. but it's only because it's great
to be back in my old kitchen.Copy !req
81. You mean with the stove
with the burnersCopy !req
82. you have to light with a match?Copy !req
83. It's the quirks,
the little quirksCopy !req
84. that make it feel like home.Copy !req
85. You know, I never knew
that the croissants in BrooklynCopy !req
86. rivaled Sant Ambroeus.Copy !req
87. They don't.
I ran up there this morning.Copy !req
88. I also stopped by to see Vanya,
who had some packages for meCopy !req
89. and arranged to have,
um, Serena's delivered.Copy !req
90. It is ludicrous that we
have to go to these lengthsCopy !req
91. to get our own mail.Copy !req
92. William, please tell me
you found a way to fix this.Copy !req
93. Well, there's nothing
technically wrong with the willCopy !req
94. so as executor,
my hands are tied.Copy !req
95. The law requires
that I remain neutral.Copy !req
96. Lily and I have a meeting
with Bruce Caplan later.Copy !req
97. I think it's best if we get our
legal opinions from an expert.Copy !req
98. He won't tell you
anything different.Copy !req
99. William, what are you
even still doing here?Copy !req
100. Uh, Rufus, William, let's
not let Ivy drive us apart.Copy !req
101. Well, sounds like everyone's
got a lot to do today.Copy !req
102. I think you should probably
get started right away.Copy !req
103. Uh, Blair and I can clean up.Copy !req
104. I don't..Copy !req
105. I... see..Copy !req
106. why... you shouldn't
all leave immediatelyCopy !req
107. 'because when you are dealing
with a charlatan'Copy !req
108. like Ivy Dickens,
time is of the essence.Copy !req
109. 'Did you see
what Lily and Serena'Copy !req
110. 'said about me today
in the paper?'Copy !req
111. - I don't read the paper.
- Not even your boyfriend's?Copy !req
112. 'Cause that's where it is.Copy !req
113. They said,
"My father's fatal overdoseCopy !req
114. "sparked my lifetimeCopy !req
115. of criminal behavior."Copy !req
116. I'm not a criminal.
You know that.Copy !req
117. Well, a year ago, I might have
agreed with you, but now..Copy !req
118. Lily has plenty of money.Copy !req
119. Cece just wanted me
to have some, too.Copy !req
120. Ivy, I really think
it would be bestCopy !req
121. if you stopped calling me, okay?Copy !req
122. 'Lola!'Copy !req
123. Hey, I was just
about to call you.Copy !req
124. Is there any chance
I could interview youCopy !req
125. for my Ivy Dickens story?Copy !req
126. I'm sorry, Serena.Copy !req
127. I'm really not comfortable
getting involved.Copy !req
128. You already are involvedCopy !req
129. never mind what she did
to your familyCopy !req
130. but what she did to you
was worst of all.Copy !req
131. I mean, she stole your identity.Copy !req
132. I really don't wanna talk
about it, okay?Copy !req
133. Especially not in the press.Copy !req
134. Okay. Well, if you change
your mind.Copy !req
135. I swear that wasn't
another botched attemptCopy !req
136. to get you two together,
she just works here.Copy !req
137. I know.Copy !req
138. All I wanna do is figure out
if I fit into this familyCopy !req
139. but I don't know how to do that
in the middle of a war with Ivy.Copy !req
140. Well, did you ever call
your uncle William back?Copy !req
141. He's Cece's executor.
She obviously trusted him a lot.Copy !req
142. Maybe he has some ideas.Copy !req
143. Yeah, I guess it couldn't hurt
to go ask.Copy !req
144. Oh. This coffee
is probably coldCopy !req
145. and I've just dumped a bunch
of my problems in your lapCopy !req
146. but I swear I came here
with good intentionsCopy !req
147. a warm beverage
and a little moral supportCopy !req
148. before your big
investor meeting.Copy !req
149. Thanks.Copy !req
150. I'm trying, Carol,
but a will is a legal document.Copy !req
151. I can't just overturn it
because you're blackmailing me.Copy !req
152. 'I don't care what's legal.
I want my inheritance.'Copy !req
153. 'You can pay me out of your
own pocket if it's easier.'Copy !req
154. You know I can't do that.
I work for a living.Copy !req
155. 'Then get ready for Serena
and Eric to hate you'Copy !req
156. 'when they find out
that you fathered my daughter'Copy !req
157. 'while you were married
to their mother.'Copy !req
158. Lily will never forgive
you, and you know that.Copy !req
159. You hired someone to play
our daughter to keep it secret.Copy !req
160. 'Yes, which should give you
some sense of'Copy !req
161. 'what I'm willing
to do to get my money.'Copy !req
162. Bye! Good luck with the lawyer.Copy !req
163. I thought
I had a primping problem.Copy !req
164. How long does it take
two middle-aged peopleCopy !req
165. to leave the apartment?Copy !req
166. At least they're finally gone.Copy !req
167. We need to move fast,
I don't know how longCopy !req
168. this meeting's gonna take.Copy !req
169. Well, at least our month
of failed intimacy attemptsCopy !req
170. brought to light every
possible potential problem.Copy !req
171. Oh, yeah, and I moved
the condoms from the dresserCopy !req
172. to the nightstand—Copy !req
173. That's one
I don't care to relive.Copy !req
174. It wasn't as bad
as the time my dad and Lily—Copy !req
175. Twice.Copy !req
176. Three times lessCopy !req
177. than Serena went
into our shared bathroom.Copy !req
178. Yeah, and how does
that housekeeper filling inCopy !req
179. for Dorota not know
how to knock?Copy !req
180. We can't even escapeCopy !req
181. to a proper pied-a-terre
in ManhattanCopy !req
182. until Georgina gets me
my divorceCopy !req
183. or my family will have
to pay the dowry.Copy !req
184. But nothing is in our way now.Copy !req
185. Not even another unfortunate
unzipping incident.Copy !req
186. Oh, my poor Prabal.Copy !req
187. - Wait.
- What?Copy !req
188. - Do you feel that?
- Uh?Copy !req
189. It's like someone's watching us.Copy !req
190. Um... it's just Cedric.Copy !req
191. Uh, maybe that'll stop.Copy !req
192. Earplugs?
Noise-canceling headphones?Copy !req
193. - This came for you.
- Thank you so much.Copy !req
194. Hey, do you have
those numbers for your column?Copy !req
195. I need them for my meeting.Copy !req
196. Yeah, they're on my desk.Copy !req
197. Thanks.Copy !req
198. Oh, hey,
I saw you and Lola earlier.Copy !req
199. Maybe you could take it
easy on her like she asked.Copy !req
200. If you don't mind,
I think I'll determineCopy !req
201. how to handle my family.Copy !req
202. Well, it was just a suggestion.Copy !req
203. S, welcome to your futureCopy !req
204. as Gossip Girl 3.0.Copy !req
205. I wouldn't tell
anyone you have this.Copy !req
206. Trust me, anonymity is keyCopy !req
207. and don't pretend
you're not intrigued.Copy !req
208. We all know there's only oneCopy !req
209. Upper East Side blogger
who mattersCopy !req
210. and it's not S by S.Copy !req
211. The power is now in your hands.
Your old friend G., singular.Copy !req
212. P.S. Keep the password
to yourself.Copy !req
213. The only recourse
you really haveCopy !req
214. is if you could prove
that Cece wasn'tCopy !req
215. of sound mind
when she changed her will.Copy !req
216. Everyone we spoke with
said that your mother's mindCopy !req
217. was sharp to the end,
even with the gin.Copy !req
218. There's no other way to get
the court to overturn the will?Copy !req
219. They'll only grant a hearing
and freeze the assetsCopy !req
220. with evidence of wrongdoing
on Ivy's part.Copy !req
221. Well, she pretended
to be my niece.Copy !req
222. What could be more wrong
than that?Copy !req
223. Nothing, if Cece had named
Charlie Rhodes in her willCopy !req
224. but she left everything
to Ivy Dickens.Copy !req
225. Cece clearly knew
who she really was.Copy !req
226. At least we have plenty of money
and a great placeCopy !req
227. to live
while we figure this out.Copy !req
228. I'm sorry, Rufus,
but I can't see a bright sideCopy !req
229. to a con artist
living in my homeCopy !req
230. debasing my mother's memory.Copy !req
231. She did something illegal.Copy !req
232. I just have to find it.Copy !req
233. I don't understand.Copy !req
234. 'I'm offering to pay you'Copy !req
235. just to show me fabric.Copy !req
236. Okay. Fine.Copy !req
237. Having trouble
finding a decorator?Copy !req
238. Or... an art consultantCopy !req
239. or a personal shopper
or anyoneCopy !req
240. from the Upper East Side
to talk to me.Copy !req
241. What's the point
of having all this moneyCopy !req
242. if no one will let me spend it?Copy !req
243. Well, perhaps
I can be of assistance.Copy !req
244. For a percentage of that money,
of course.Copy !req
245. I'd pay anything
to get Lily and SerenaCopy !req
246. to stop blackballing me.Copy !req
247. All you have to do
is throw a party.Copy !req
248. Why? No one will come.Copy !req
249. They'll have no choice
if it's a benefit to honorCopy !req
250. the Celia Rhodes
Cancer Foundation.Copy !req
251. I'll see to that..Copy !req
252. for a healthy fee.Copy !req
253. You just can't let anybody
know that it was my idea.Copy !req
254. You've done a great job
building upCopy !req
255. a full-fledged news sourceCopy !req
256. but with so many other
media optionsCopy !req
257. what sets you apart
to compete long term?Copy !req
258. Well, we don't just
follow the news.Copy !req
259. We're the people involved in itCopy !req
260. so we get the stories
and perspectivesCopy !req
261. that no one else has access to.Copy !req
262. 'Isn't that
Serena Van Der Woodsen?'Copy !req
263. I've seen her
in the society pages.Copy !req
264. Exactly my point.Copy !req
265. Serena. This is James Mackenzie.Copy !req
266. He's considering becoming
our new financial partner.Copy !req
267. Oh. It's a pleasure.Copy !req
268. Serena's blog is one ofCopy !req
269. "The Spectator's" biggest draws.Copy !req
270. I'm just writing a story
right now on Ivy Dickens.Copy !req
271. That's the woman
who inherited everythingCopy !req
272. from your grandmother,
I read about her.Copy !req
273. 'Like I said, Serena's'Copy !req
274. 'writing from the inside.'Copy !req
275. She's our generation'sCopy !req
276. Dominick Dunne.Copy !req
277. 'I can't wait to read it.'Copy !req
278. Nate, you can expect
an official offerCopy !req
279. by tonight.Copy !req
280. Thank you, James. I look forward
to working with you.Copy !req
281. I'll see myself out.Copy !req
282. I hope he means it.Copy !req
283. His offer is the only one
with the money we need.Copy !req
284. So thank you. I think your Ivy
expose helped close the deal.Copy !req
285. Is that the story?Copy !req
286. Oh. Gossip Girl's back?Copy !req
287. I think so. I don't know.Copy !req
288. I was just, um, looking
up some stuffCopy !req
289. on Ivy,
but there is a new post.Copy !req
290. Do you know she's throwing
a party tonight in Cece's honor?Copy !req
291. I-I can't believe this girl.
She has no shame.Copy !req
292. That we knew. Strange I didn't
get the blast yet.Copy !req
293. I figured she was still on
vacation, whatever that means.Copy !req
294. Yeah. I-I just got it now,
so I'm sure you'll get it soon.Copy !req
295. Well, let me know
what you find on Ivy.Copy !req
296. I'm gonna go see how we're doingCopy !req
297. on that "Jack Bass
saving Chuck" story.Copy !req
298. There was no answer
in Dr. Van Der Woodsen's roomCopy !req
299. so I was wondering
if I could leave a message.Copy !req
300. Oh. Actually, never mind.Copy !req
301. Lily just RSVP'd
she's coming.Copy !req
302. The plan's working. And thanks
for helping me with the caterer.Copy !req
303. You can keep the thank yousCopy !req
304. but I'll take that check
you offered.Copy !req
305. I still haven't heard
from Serena.Copy !req
306. 'Well, that wasn't part
of our agreement.'Copy !req
307. Look, I've lived here
long enough to knowCopy !req
308. not to write a check
until they actually show up.Copy !req
309. I'll see what I can do.Copy !req
310. Hey. If I have to be sober
tonight, shouldn't you?Copy !req
311. I just had an interesting
conversation with Nate.Copy !req
312. It's about time he confessed
his true feelings for you.Copy !req
313. "The Spectator" is doing a storyCopy !req
314. on the hospital
dedication tonightCopy !req
315. and his reporter
did some research on you.Copy !req
316. Well, if she's having a coronaryCopy !req
317. reading about my history,
then I can help her.Copy !req
318. I'm about to have
my own hospital wing.Copy !req
319. Incredibly,
it wasn't your fondnessCopy !req
320. of the beer bath at ChodovarCopy !req
321. or your restraining orders
that caught her eye.Copy !req
322. It was your time at Eton.Copy !req
323. It's an English boarding school.Copy !req
324. Everyone tries it.Copy !req
325. Schoolboy exploits asideCopy !req
326. spending more than three months
in the UK from 1980 to 1996Copy !req
327. prohibits you from donating
blood in this country.Copy !req
328. Didn't they ask you about that?Copy !req
329. Yeah. They also asked me
if I ever used drugsCopy !req
330. or slept with prostitutes.Copy !req
331. I told them
what they wanted to hearCopy !req
332. so I could save your life.Copy !req
333. Right.Copy !req
334. I should've known betterCopy !req
335. than to expect you
to play by the rules.Copy !req
336. It's the only way
I'm predictable.Copy !req
337. I should get to the hospital,
make sureCopy !req
338. everything's ready for tonight.Copy !req
339. I'll see you there.Copy !req
340. I'll just drink enough
to behave normally.Copy !req
341. Hey. How'd your meeting go?Copy !req
342. I should have
the official offer tonight.Copy !req
343. Oh, that's great.Copy !req
344. - Congratulations.
- Thanks.Copy !req
345. You're a good actress, but
that smile doesn't look real.Copy !req
346. What's wrong?Copy !req
347. Not to sound tacky, but can I
ask you a rich person question?Copy !req
348. I put my extensive knowledge
of privilegeCopy !req
349. fully at your disposal.Copy !req
350. Well, when I went
to go see WilliamCopy !req
351. I ended up overhearing
Ivy offering him money.Copy !req
352. He's the executor of Cece's
will, so that's sketchy, right?Copy !req
353. A beneficiary is not allowed
to reward an executor.Copy !req
354. It would call the entire
inheritance into questionCopy !req
355. if he was working for her.Copy !req
356. Do you think William would
do that to his family, though?Copy !req
357. Well, William's history
isn't exactly pristine.Copy !req
358. He's been known
to con people and so is Ivy.Copy !req
359. I mean, this would be grounds
to contest the will in court.Copy !req
360. I think you have
to tell Serena.Copy !req
361. I have to think about it.Copy !req
362. And I have to get to class, too.Copy !req
363. Um... let's just keep this
between us for now, okay?Copy !req
364. Yeah. Okay.Copy !req
365. Let me guess.
You're redecorating.Copy !req
366. I know that the jewelry mother
left me is here somewhere.Copy !req
367. I can't believe I have to go
to a benefit for my motherCopy !req
368. as a guest at my home.Copy !req
369. You sure you don't want me
there for moral support?Copy !req
370. No, you've so been
looking forwardCopy !req
371. to this magnetic fields concert,
and let's be honest.Copy !req
372. I fake a happy face
better than you do.Copy !req
373. I just wanted
to wear something of Cece'sCopy !req
374. to remind everyone
who her true daughter really is.Copy !req
375. Hm. Will, uh,
this necklace work?Copy !req
376. It's perfect.Copy !req
377. Thank you.Copy !req
378. I know... how hard
this has been, Lil.Copy !req
379. Um, so if it helpsCopy !req
380. I decided to buy us
a little privacy.Copy !req
381. You reconsidered
about the hotel?Copy !req
382. Well, just for tonight,
to start.Copy !req
383. Oh, that's great,
and then once we realizeCopy !req
384. it's easier,
we can always extend.Copy !req
385. Oh, my God. I'm gonna pack.Copy !req
386. No. You don't need
any more stress.Copy !req
387. That's why I got
the room for Dan.Copy !req
388. I should take this for the loft.Copy !req
389. I don't know how I didn't
think of that sooner.Copy !req
390. 'Oh!'Copy !req
391. And us entering separately
eliminated the threatCopy !req
392. of anyone seeing us together.Copy !req
393. Alas, no car alarms.
There's no construction.Copy !req
394. No friends, no housekeepers,
or family to interrupt.Copy !req
395. Oh. I think I forgot
the champagne at your place.Copy !req
396. We don't need it...
or this conversation.Copy !req
397. Let's hope that good flings
come to those who wait.Copy !req
398. Wow.Copy !req
399. Yeah. My words exactly.Copy !req
400. Well, it was only one word.Copy !req
401. One's all you need, really.Copy !req
402. Yeah.Copy !req
403. Well, I would love
to stay for seconds, but..Copy !req
404. I should really get back home
and make sure that fake DorotaCopy !req
405. doesn't put my Lemaire cashmere
in the washer again.Copy !req
406. Well, it's understandable.Copy !req
407. Well, I-I mean, anyway,
we're... we're both..Copy !req
408. going to that horrible Ivy
thing tonight, right?Copy !req
409. 'I mean, that's the only reason
why we had to finish'Copy !req
410. in such a timely fashion.Copy !req
411. Yeah, family obligations
are important.Copy !req
412. Right. Well..Copy !req
413. I'll see you over..Copy !req
414. Tacky aperitifs.Copy !req
415. I'm sorry, Mr. BassCopy !req
416. there must be a misspelling
or a glitch in the system.Copy !req
417. I can't find your file.Copy !req
418. All my records are missing?Copy !req
419. I was on duty
the night of your accidentCopy !req
420. but the only Bass that came up
in my search is first name Jack.Copy !req
421. Oh, his records
are fine, too, actually.Copy !req
422. Except I'm not allowed
to show youCopy !req
423. another patient's information.Copy !req
424. Of course.Copy !req
425. I'm just trying
to find out some specificsCopy !req
426. about his blood donation
that saved my life.Copy !req
427. I was hoping to mention them
when I dedicate the new wingCopy !req
428. in his honor.Copy !req
429. He's the one
who gave you blood?Copy !req
430. - I don't understand.
- I'm sorry.Copy !req
431. I can't discuss
someone else's chart.Copy !req
432. So I'll stop asking you to.Copy !req
433. Could you let
Director BrancoliniCopy !req
434. know that I'm here?Copy !req
435. I'd like to speak
with him before the ceremony.Copy !req
436. My pleasure.Copy !req
437. I don't understand.Copy !req
438. If Lola saw
my dad take money from IvyCopy !req
439. then why didn't
she tell me herself?Copy !req
440. You know this
is complicated for her.Copy !req
441. I just thought
you deserved to knowCopy !req
442. and this way, Lola doesn't have
to be in the middle of anything.Copy !req
443. Oh, yeah, but instead
she'll just accuse my dadCopy !req
444. of taking bribes.Copy !req
445. 'Look, he would never do
something like that.'Copy !req
446. Lola just must have heard wrong.Copy !req
447. I don't think she did,
but don't worry.Copy !req
448. I'm not gonna write anything
until I confirm it.Copy !req
449. You're not gonna write anything?
What are you talking about?Copy !req
450. This is my article.Copy !req
451. You're too close, Serena.
I'm sorry.Copy !req
452. I can't take a chance
on the articleCopy !req
453. that hooked Mackenzie.Copy !req
454. Hey, dad.
I-I'm so glad it's you.Copy !req
455. I wanted to ask you something.Copy !req
456. Great. Let's chat
at Ivy Dickens' party tonight.Copy !req
457. I wasn't planning on going
to that. Why on earth are you?Copy !req
458. I know how you feel about her,
but it is a benefitCopy !req
459. to honor your grandmother.Copy !req
460. 'I felt we should all be there
as a family.'Copy !req
461. Um... okay. You know what, dad?Copy !req
462. Um... I guess you're right.Copy !req
463. 'I'll be there at 7:30.'Copy !req
464. Great. Alright, love.Copy !req
465. Serena's coming.Copy !req
466. All we need now
is for Ivy to write that check.Copy !req
467. Yes, our proof she's engaging
in illegal activity.Copy !req
468. The court will have
to agree to hear our case.Copy !req
469. Tick-tock, Upper East Siders.Copy !req
470. This time bomb is about to send
Ivy's party up in smoke.Copy !req
471. I thought it was crank callCopy !req
472. when you say
that you come to Queens.Copy !req
473. Why? You know my
manners are impeccable.Copy !req
474. Even if it means crossing
into unsavory areasCopy !req
475. to give you a baby gift.Copy !req
476. You weren't there
to wrap it, so..Copy !req
477. This is re-gift from
your wedding to PrinceCopy !req
478. not present for Leo.Copy !req
479. Well, everyone
brings the child a giftCopy !req
480. but no one needs champagne
more than a new mother.Copy !req
481. You must have something
to break these in with.Copy !req
482. This will do.Copy !req
483. Hey, I'll be here. Thanks.Copy !req
484. Hey, man, I was just
in the neighborhood.Copy !req
485. Thought I'd stop by
to see if you, uhCopy !req
486. wanted to grab a drink or..Copy !req
487. You know what?
We could just drink here.Copy !req
488. 'I figure you must have
something unless you haven't'Copy !req
489. honored our
"Be like Don Draper" pact.Copy !req
490. 'Does this sudden
onset alcoholism'Copy !req
491. have something to do with Blair?Copy !req
492. No. Uh, Blair's great.Copy !req
493. It's perfectly normal
for a new relationshipCopy !req
494. to need time to
find its, uh, its groove.Copy !req
495. The sex was bad, wasn't it?Copy !req
496. It happened to you, too?Copy !req
497. It must be her, then.
That makes me feel a lot better.Copy !req
498. Now that you drink, spill.Copy !req
499. What Mr. Lonely Boy do?Copy !req
500. Don't tell me the anatomicalCopy !req
501. reason he always so lonely?Copy !req
502. Dorota! No!Copy !req
503. Everything was
physically appealing.Copy !req
504. But the problem wasn't
the man. It was the deed.Copy !req
505. You see, I didn't have any
technical difficulties.Copy !req
506. Uh, it was just...
inexplicably terrible.Copy !req
507. Hmm, sounds like a classic case
of the Dan Humphrey overthink.Copy !req
508. Alright, so what if
after the build-upCopy !req
509. that aspect of
the relationship doesn't work?Copy !req
510. Maybe he nervous.Copy !req
511. Uh, what he say when you
tell him sex only so-so?Copy !req
512. 'Well, what did
Blair say about it?'Copy !req
513. Nothing at all.Copy !req
514. Oh, you mean after you lied
and told her how great it was?Copy !req
515. Honesty is your only shot
at making this any better.Copy !req
516. Well, it would've been impolite
and I didn't want to upset him.Copy !req
517. Upset is only the beginning
if you say nothing.Copy !req
518. It take honest communicationCopy !req
519. to turn Vanya from boyCopy !req
520. to man in bedroom.Copy !req
521. I'm gonna need another drink
to forget I just heard that.Copy !req
522. 'You need to go talk to her.'Copy !req
523. Okay. Just after one more drink.Copy !req
524. You're looking for
answer in the wrong borough.Copy !req
525. You need to talk
to Mr. Lonely boy.Copy !req
526. Fine, but I'm gonna
need a stronger buzzCopy !req
527. to enter Ivy's party.Copy !req
528. We're only good friends.Copy !req
529. Wine?Copy !req
530. Oh. Red wine at
a cocktail party.Copy !req
531. Excuse me.Copy !req
532. Why? What's wrong with it?Copy !req
533. Well, you don't serve redCopy !req
534. when people are moving around.Copy !req
535. If they were to spill..Copy !req
536. Well, I trust my guests,
including you.Copy !req
537. Thank you for coming.Copy !req
538. Yes, well,
you know quite wellCopy !req
539. that I would not miss a chance
to honor my mother.Copy !req
540. I miss her, too.Copy !req
541. I know she would
want us to be close.Copy !req
542. So I was hoping we could respect
her wishes by talking again.Copy !req
543. We used to have such
a wonderful relationship.Copy !req
544. Yes, yes, under,
uh, false pretenses.Copy !req
545. Then let this
be our fresh start.Copy !req
546. Um, excuse me.Copy !req
547. Could we have a picture, please?Copy !req
548. For Cece.Copy !req
549. Since when do ribbon cuttings
involve crippled kids?Copy !req
550. I wouldn't call him
crippled to his face.Copy !req
551. Sorry, kid, but let's
face it. You're crippled.Copy !req
552. Michael, meet Jack.Copy !req
553. Don't touch me.Copy !req
554. After hearing about his
brave battle with leukemiaCopy !req
555. I decided a blood drive
would be a much better symbolCopy !req
556. of your heroism than
a simple ribbon cutting.Copy !req
557. Well, another needle
in the arm doesn't soundCopy !req
558. like a celebration, unless
it's putting something in.Copy !req
559. We can celebrate properly later.Copy !req
560. He's ready.Copy !req
561. Okay, you know I can't
give that kid my blood, so..Copy !req
562. Go away.Copy !req
563. Thank you, Michael.Copy !req
564. Tell your agent
the check's in the mail.Copy !req
565. You played me with a fake kid?Copy !req
566. No, the kid's real.
He's just not sick.Copy !req
567. But you are... with hepatitis.Copy !req
568. Since I don't have it,
I know you didn't give me blood.Copy !req
569. It's the only way I could
get you to admit it.Copy !req
570. So I guess this is the end
of the Jack Bass Wing.Copy !req
571. Well, we can discuss that
after you tell me the truth.Copy !req
572. Looks like you're
having a stellar debut.Copy !req
573. - Umm.
- Which means I did my job.Copy !req
574. Yes. Thank you.Copy !req
575. And I will write you that checkCopy !req
576. just after I talk
to Lauren San Domingo.Copy !req
577. I can't believe she came.Copy !req
578. Hey. How you holding up?Copy !req
579. Well, seeing our home taken overCopy !req
580. by Florida trash is torture
but I'm taking it in stride.Copy !req
581. It'll all be over soon.Copy !req
582. She offered your father a bribe.Copy !req
583. How do you know that?Copy !req
584. Well, William told me
right after she did it.Copy !req
585. And luckily, he thought
quickly and he acceptedCopy !req
586. knowing it was
the ammunition we needCopy !req
587. to take her case to court.Copy !req
588. He'll likely be
removed as executorCopy !req
589. but he's willing to make
that sacrifice for us.Copy !req
590. Mom, that's-that's amazing,
but what are you waiting for?Copy !req
591. Ivy hasn't written
your father a check yet.Copy !req
592. Hopefully it'll be any minute.Copy !req
593. Now look, I know
how much you dislike herCopy !req
594. but don't say anything yet.Copy !req
595. We don't wanna spook her.Copy !req
596. That's just what I was thinking.Copy !req
597. You know, I just realized
I have an 8 o'clock deadline.Copy !req
598. Um, I hope she didn't
pack up my old computer.Copy !req
599. - Excuse me. Oh, Serena.
- Hi, Mr. Cavett.Copy !req
600. Oh, you look like
a million bucks before taxes.Copy !req
601. Oh, gosh, thank you.Copy !req
602. As the late Bob Hope
would say, "Grrr."Copy !req
603. Oh, seriously, though,
I was so sorryCopy !req
604. to hear about
your grandmother's passing.Copy !req
605. She was such a..
How would you say?Copy !req
606. Such a-such an original
woman, wouldn't you say?Copy !req
607. Oh, yes. Well, thank you.Copy !req
608. - 'Dan.'
- Blair, hey.Copy !req
609. What are you doing here?Copy !req
610. I'm, um... same as you.Copy !req
611. I'm just going to-going
to the party.Copy !req
612. So let's go up,
ins-instead of staying hereCopy !req
613. and talking 'cause there's
nothing to talk about.Copy !req
614. Yeah, I agree.
There's nothing at all.Copy !req
615. I hope she has a full bar.Copy !req
616. Yeah. Mm, me, too.Copy !req
617. Oh, Serena, go easier on me
in your column from now on.Copy !req
618. Oh, you gotta stop
being so scandalous.Copy !req
619. Look, I can't miss
this deadline.Copy !req
620. Take care.Copy !req
621. Oh, Serena, I've been
looking for you everywhere.Copy !req
622. - Now's not a good time.
- It's about Ivy.Copy !req
623. I would love to talk about her
but I just have to doCopy !req
624. something before 8 o'clock.Copy !req
625. "You can steal money,
but you can't steal class.Copy !req
626. "Looks like Ivy's finally
poisoned what little remainedCopy !req
627. "of her good will.Copy !req
628. Last I heard, it was illegal
to bribe an executor."Copy !req
629. That's what
I wanted to tell you.Copy !req
630. I guess Gossip Girl
got to it first.Copy !req
631. And ruined everything.Copy !req
632. I should have known you
only came to humiliate meCopy !req
633. with more of your lies.Copy !req
634. I didn't bribe William.Copy !req
635. You tried.Copy !req
636. You said you'd pay me to get
people to attend this party.Copy !req
637. Oh, because you offered.Copy !req
638. This is just all a setup.Copy !req
639. The only setup here is whateverCopy !req
640. you did to manipulate my mother.Copy !req
641. You have no proof
I did anything wrong.Copy !req
642. You'd kick me out of this
house and you can't.Copy !req
643. I should have
never had you back.Copy !req
644. Please, you have
to tell everyoneCopy !req
645. that you saw Ivy
offer to pay my father.Copy !req
646. - You're the only proof we have.
- I don't know, Serena.Copy !req
647. From what I saw, it looked
like William was in on it.Copy !req
648. He only agreed to
take the money to proveCopy !req
649. that Ivy was
defrauding people.Copy !req
650. I didn't know his plan either.Copy !req
651. That's why I'm the one that sent
the tip in to Gossip Girl.Copy !req
652. Now you're the only one who
can fix what I screwed up.Copy !req
653. This is your chance
to help our family.Copy !req
654. Oh, stop saying "our."Copy !req
655. I still don't know if I wanna
be part of this family.Copy !req
656. Is that really how you feel?Copy !req
657. Or how your mother
wants you to?Copy !req
658. 'Cause she kept you from
us your entire life.Copy !req
659. She lied to you
because she didn't wantCopy !req
660. anyone else to love you,
not to mentionCopy !req
661. she never even told you
who your father was.Copy !req
662. What does my father
have to do with this?Copy !req
663. Because without him
and without herCopy !req
664. we're the only family
you have left.Copy !req
665. And we really need you.Copy !req
666. This elevator is so slow.Copy !req
667. Feels like
it's not even moving.Copy !req
668. Did you push the button?Copy !req
669. I thought you did it.Copy !req
670. Ah, you are wasted.Copy !req
671. This elevator
smells like vodka.Copy !req
672. Vodka doesn't smell and..Copy !req
673. you are drunker than I am.Copy !req
674. And I can tell by
the fact that you're notCopy !req
675. hyper-verbal that youCopy !req
676. are avoiding something.Copy !req
677. Well, I can tell by
the fact that you drank vodkaCopy !req
678. that you are, too.Copy !req
679. Mm. You first.Copy !req
680. Fine. Fine.Copy !req
681. I wasn't a 100%
honest with you today.Copy !req
682. Me neither.Copy !req
683. That "wow" really meantCopy !req
684. "Wow, that was terrible."Copy !req
685. And it was just-it was...
mind-numbingly boring.Copy !req
686. Like the least sexy thing
since Courtney Stodden.Copy !req
687. Yeah, I mean, I don't know who
that is, but it's much worse.Copy !req
688. Oh, so what-what are..Copy !req
689. Is our chemistry
just purely intellectual?Copy !req
690. - Is it only in our heads?
- Apparently.Copy !req
691. But before we,
uh, we-we break upCopy !req
692. I just wanna let you know
that you were reallyCopy !req
693. really good in my head.Copy !req
694. I am really, really
good out of it, too.Copy !req
695. No. I don't think so.Copy !req
696. Hey, I will prove it to you.Copy !req
697. Right-right here
in this elevator?Copy !req
698. But people have to go...
up and down.Copy !req
699. Mm, yes, they do.Copy !req
700. I'd like to think my night
with Pamela AndersonCopy !req
701. was worth it, but it hasn't
seemed to slow me down.Copy !req
702. I like to think of myself as
the Magic Johnson of Hep-C.Copy !req
703. Why didn't you
just tell me the truth?Copy !req
704. And give up
a hospital wing in my name?Copy !req
705. We both know if you
wanted one, you'd just buy one.Copy !req
706. You're covering for who
really gave me the blood.Copy !req
707. Elizabeth.Copy !req
708. She didn't want you to know.Copy !req
709. Especially, well, after sheCopy !req
710. told you she wasn't your mother.Copy !req
711. Well, I guess this proves
otherwise once and for all.Copy !req
712. - I'd like to thank her.
- She's unreachable.Copy !req
713. I mean, just refer to your
previous 20 years on Earth.Copy !req
714. Let it be.Copy !req
715. Does it matter why you're alive?Copy !req
716. The fact is, you are.Copy !req
717. This weekend did remind meCopy !req
718. how much I value all my senses.Copy !req
719. We're all the family we need.Copy !req
720. Let's do this again.Copy !req
721. My turf next time.Copy !req
722. Do I need to call security
to escort you out?Copy !req
723. We're just waiting
for the elevator, okay?Copy !req
724. And we'll be back.
This is our home.Copy !req
725. Not anymore.Copy !req
726. Tonight made me see why
Cece left it all to me.Copy !req
727. You're so selfish that youCopy !req
728. couldn't even
honor her for an hour.Copy !req
729. 'I cared about her.'Copy !req
730. All you care about is
ruining me with your lies.Copy !req
731. - 'It's not a lie.'
- Lola.Copy !req
732. I heard you offering
to pay William myself.Copy !req
733. That's exactly
the proof we need.Copy !req
734. No, it's not.Copy !req
735. They're setting me up.Copy !req
736. You know I wouldn't do that.Copy !req
737. All I know is what I saw, Ivy.Copy !req
738. I'll have my lawyers
start proceedingsCopy !req
739. to contest the will immediately.Copy !req
740. Uh, go ahead.
You don't have a case.Copy !req
741. - I didn't do anything wrong.
- The court will decide that.Copy !req
742. 'In the meantime, your
assets will be frozen.'Copy !req
743. Thank you for coming forward.Copy !req
744. I can't believe
you're taking their side.Copy !req
745. 'I mean, they're
just using you.'Copy !req
746. And when they're done,
they'll throw you outCopy !req
747. just like they did me.Copy !req
748. No, they won't.
They're my family.Copy !req
749. Looks like Lola's
untangled some knotsCopy !req
750. to form family ties.Copy !req
751. Well, this just
proves sometimesCopy !req
752. you gotta throw away
the first pancake.Copy !req
753. I don't know how breakfast food
has anything to do with thisCopy !req
754. but obviouslyCopy !req
755. this afternoon was an anomaly.Copy !req
756. Where to?Copy !req
757. Rufus and Lily are
definitely gonna come backCopy !req
758. to the loftat some point.Copy !req
759. Mm, Serena will be at my place.Copy !req
760. I still have that hotel room.Copy !req
761. To be haunted by
the ghost of bad sex past?Copy !req
762. You two lovebirds going
somewhere or not?Copy !req
763. I need another drink.Copy !req
764. Alright, uh, take us
to Williamsburg, please.Copy !req
765. There's a place there.
It's got about 300 whiskeys.Copy !req
766. And hopefully
a clean bathroom we can use.Copy !req
767. Thanks again for coming
forward up there.Copy !req
768. It's the least I can do
after thinking you wereCopy !req
769. conspiring with Ivy,
sorry about that.Copy !req
770. It's hard to know what
to think when no one'sCopy !req
771. told you the whole story.Copy !req
772. Seriously. No one's ever
told me my whole story.Copy !req
773. I used to know
your mother pretty well.Copy !req
774. And if she's concealing
things from you then it's..Copy !req
775. probably only
to protect you.Copy !req
776. Protect me?Copy !req
777. How did it protect me
to grow up aloneCopy !req
778. with no family but her?Copy !req
779. Hey.Copy !req
780. Talk to your mom.
Forgive her.Copy !req
781. I messed things up so badly
with Serena and EricCopy !req
782. that it took a long time
to rebuild the relationshipCopy !req
783. and they found a place in
their hearts to forgive meCopy !req
784. but... I would never do anythingCopy !req
785. ever again to lose them.Copy !req
786. I know. Parents are human.Copy !req
787. Everybody makes mistakes.Copy !req
788. What if my dad
doesn't even know I exist?Copy !req
789. What if all he'd want
is to know me?Copy !req
790. I'm sure he does.Copy !req
791. Here's your cab.
You catch this one, okay?Copy !req
792. I'll catch the next.Copy !req
793. - Thank you.
- Goodnight.Copy !req
794. Hey. I got your text.Copy !req
795. What's so important I had to
come into the office tonight?Copy !req
796. "The Spectator's" entire future.Copy !req
797. What are you talking about?Copy !req
798. Mr. Mackenzie saw
the story about IvyCopy !req
799. you obviously sent in
to Gossip Girl.Copy !req
800. You knew I hooked him with
our exclusive access.Copy !req
801. He said if I couldn't
deliver on thatCopy !req
802. he couldn't trust me to deliver
on the big things either.Copy !req
803. He backed out, Serena.Copy !req
804. I'm sorry, Nate.Copy !req
805. I-I just wanted
to help my familyCopy !req
806. and you wouldn't let me put
it on "The Spectator."Copy !req
807. Yeah, well, that's all well
and good, but you're fired.Copy !req
808. A-are you kidding me?Copy !req
809. None of this would have happenedCopy !req
810. if you hadn't taken
the story away from me.Copy !req
811. Yeah, and I was right
not to trust youCopy !req
812. with it or anything else.Copy !req
813. Now I have to go try
and save the jobsCopy !req
814. of the people
who still work here.Copy !req
815. Spring is the season
of rebirth.Copy !req
816. A time for change.Copy !req
817. A time to blossom.Copy !req
818. I know it's a victory
but what if Ivy pullsCopy !req
819. an Anna Nicole Smith and takes
it to the Supreme Court?Copy !req
820. This could take years.Copy !req
821. Maybe we should look
for another place.Copy !req
822. We have another place.Copy !req
823. No, I mean
a more permanent home.Copy !req
824. Took me a while to get used
to the Upper East Side, too.Copy !req
825. Oh.Copy !req
826. But there are
always late bloomers.Copy !req
827. - Do you take credit cards?
- Sorry, miss, we don't.Copy !req
828. And some buds are nipped
before they can grow.Copy !req
829. 'Whoo!'Copy !req
830. That Japanese whisky went so
well with Croquet Monsieur.Copy !req
831. I told you.
Great things grow in Brooklyn.Copy !req
832. Well, now we have the problem
of where do we go from here?Copy !req
833. Uh... here looks pretty good.Copy !req
834. What?Copy !req
835. New relationships flourish
and take on new form.Copy !req
836. Andrew, you remember
the woman with the locketCopy !req
837. I had you look
for a couple years ago?Copy !req
838. Elizabeth Fisher?Copy !req
839. Yeah, my mother.Copy !req
840. I need to find her again.Copy !req
841. While old relationships
can be re-examined.Copy !req
842. I just left Chuck.Copy !req
843. He knows it wasn't my blood.Copy !req
844. 'I think you should come back
and handle it yourself.'Copy !req
845. But some things never change.Copy !req
846. This is the Upper East
Side, in case you forgot.Copy !req
847. 'Before you say anything'Copy !req
848. I'm sorry that
I told Serena what you saw.Copy !req
849. I wanted an honest relationshipCopy !req
850. and I shouldn't have
betrayed your trust.Copy !req
851. Thanks. I'm just glad
everything's on the table now.Copy !req
852. Yeah.Copy !req
853. Uh, I don't wanna move, but
I know it's my lawyer.Copy !req
854. Alright, please tell me
we have an offerCopy !req
855. that'll at least keep
"The Spectator" afloat.Copy !req
856. Yes, I, uh,
I do know Diana Payne.Copy !req
857. I read your blogCopy !req
858. and while you do
a pretty good meCopy !req
859. you're not the real deal.Copy !req
860. So if you'll just
hand over the passwordCopy !req
861. I'd like my site back.Copy !req
862. XOXO, Gossip Girl.Copy !req