Gossip Girl 4x13

1. Gossip Girl here, your one and only source

2. into the scandalous lives of Manhattan's elite.

3. I see you've met my daughter.

4. Raina Thorpe.

5. 'I have decided to set my sights'

6. 'on a company that has just come back up on the block.'

7. Bass Industries.

8. My car is just outside.

9. I'll wait five minutes before takin' off.

10. What in the hell were you trying to do?

11. - Get Ben out of prison. - What, by putting me in?

12. The information about Ben in the affidavit

13. can never get out, ever.

14. I'm here to see Ben Donovan.

15. I'm sorry. You just missed him. Mr. Donovan was released.

16. - Are you free for coffee? - I'm free for anything.

17. Have you come to recruit another virgin to be your drug mule?

18. I would say. Why, are you available?

19. Where has she been, Serena?

20. And who am I?

21. That's a secret I'll never tell.

22. You know you love me.

23. XOXO.

24. Gossip Girl.

25. Brr, Upper East Siders.

26. It's cold outside.

27. And as February approaches, we need to find ways

28. to fight frostbite.

29. Some keep warm the old-fashioned way.

30. Who knew what a turn-on it would be

31. to sleep with a woman trying to buy my company?

32. As long as we play clean in business I'm happy to keep it.

33. Dirty between the sheets.

34. Some seek the comfort of loved ones.

35. And some try to keep away the gloom..

36. What are you doing up this early?

37. by painting things bright.

38. Breakfast with Ben. And don't lecture.

39. He's a nice person, a nice, innocent person

40. who deserves a friend after what my mom did to him.

41. A lot of mascara for a friend

42. but you can have breakfast with whomever you want.

43. I don't judge.

44. Well, today I don't.

45. Because today everything is new and fresh and golden.

46. Today my internship begins.

47. You're finally gonna tell me where it is?

48. It's too important. I can't jinx it.

49. I'll tell you after my first day, but... I must go.

50. But you realize most offices aren't even open this early

51. unless you're interning at a doughnut shop?

52. I want to be early. What is wrong with being early?

53. Catch the worm!

54. Okay, I'll see you at the "W" party tonight.

55. And good luck at your new job at the mayor's office

56. or the Whitney or CIA or... whatever.

57. This, this is like living with Don Draper.

58. Lily, again, thank you so much for getting me this opportunity.

59. Just so you know, it may not be what—

60. Don't worry, I realize most internships are about

61. exploitation and espresso runs.

62. I'm just happy to get a chance to be around writing again.

63. Well, then you're welcome, Daniel.

64. How about a celebratory breakfast?

65. Oh, you know, I-I can't. I'm super busy.

66. I gotta, I gotta limber up for all this bootlicking

67. I'm gonna be doing, but thank you.

68. Okay. Bye.

69. Well, at least one of our kids appreciates me.

70. - Lily. - I get Ben out on parole.

71. But Serena and Eric continue to treat me like I'm toxic.

72. I know you did what you could

73. but Ben's still gonna have a criminal record.

74. Give them time.

75. Everything I do or have ever done

76. is for my children.

77. And someday they'll realize that.

78. Right?

79. - Hmm. - Hmm.

80. No, please, let me.

81. I asked. You got last time.

82. I'm sorry I had to leave so abruptly.

83. My, uh, friend Edward was waiting for me.

84. How's life on his sofa?

85. Pullout couch beats a prison cot.

86. Serena, the reason I asked you here

87. is 'cause I heard from an old college friend.

88. He's starting an organic farm in Ithaca.

89. Wants me to move up there.

90. Wow.

91. Ithaca, it-it's supposed to be beautiful.

92. But are you sure?

93. Being outside all day, work with my hands..

94. after being cooped up for so long

95. it's kind of ideal.

96. Yeah.

97. Well, I hope we get to spend

98. some time together before you go.

99. I'm leavin' tomorrow.

100. I wanna start my new life as soon as possible.

101. I hope you understand.

102. Yeah. Yeah, of course.

103. I'm sure we can

104. you know, write or email or call or..

105. I'm really happy for you.

106. Take care, Serena.

107. Rufus, hey, you used to have a plot

108. in a community garden, right?

109. You gotta be kidding. "Scorpio Rising" was a great film.

110. That dreck puts the ick in esoteric.

111. Alright, fine. We can go see The Merchant Ivory retrospective.

112. You can ensure that your delicate sensibilities

113. aren't disturbed and I can catch up on my sleep.

114. Going to movies is a one or... four-time thing.

115. It's not like we're friends.

116. I never suggested we were, but I am going to see

117. The Joseph Beuys exhibit in Chelsea.

118. Oh, you are such a boy.

119. How could you go to that

120. when the Degas is about to close at the Morgan?

121. You are such a girl. I'm gonna take a pass on the ballerinas.

122. Frilly dresses and tutus are not my idea of art.

123. Fashion is the most powerful art there is.

124. It's movement, design, and architecture all in one.

125. It shows the world who we are and who we'd like to be

126. just like your scarf suggests

127. that you'd like to sell used cars.

128. Vanessa gave me this scarf.

129. Look, I-I have to go. Stop wasting my time.

130. 'You know today is a big day for me.'

131. So you're gonna finally tell me what internship you got?

132. No, alright. Well, then I won't say which one I got either.

133. I will see you Sunday at the Morgan.

134. I will wear my most fashionable toe shoes.

135. Don't get your hopes up.

136. Serena. Hey, it's great to see you.

137. I-I heard about The Ostroff Center

138. and-and Juliet giving you the—

139. The drugs that you sold her?

140. I had no idea what her plans were.

141. I ju.. I wanna make sure that you're okay.

142. Look, I couldn't care less about clearing your conscience.

143. When are you gonna realize your occupation hurts people?

144. I don't give anyone anything they don't come looking for.

145. Okay, well, then I guess you're only half responsible

146. that I almost died.

147. "W" stands for, "Way better" than I even imagined.

148. I'm already planning outfits in my head.

149. If you mean outfits for Lara Stone to wear

150. in our Meisel shoot on Friday

151. I would love to hear your thoughts

152. but if you're dreaming about what you're gonna wear

153. to the party tonight, think again.

154. I saw that movie, too, but this is real life

155. not some Hollywood chick flick where a girl with a scrunchie

156. gets a makeover and triumphs in the end.

157. I have never owned a scrunchie.

158. I think I read that on your resume.

159. Down there is the main production area

160. conference room, and through those doors

161. editor in chief, Stefano Tonchi.

162. And how soon can I get a sit-down with him?

163. I have some exciting new ideas that

164. I've organized in a PowerPoint presentation.

165. I've been Stefano's assistant since he took over.

166. I've barely had five minutes alone with him.

167. But my research says he has an open door policy

168. that he's collaborative.

169. Doesn't mean he isn't crazy busy.

170. Then it sounds like he needs my help immediately.

171. Ah, you're all so young, so adorable.

172. All who?

173. All of you interns.

174. But I... thought it was just me.

175. Thousands of applications.

176. These are the best of the best.

177. I'm the best of the best. I'm Blair Waldorf.

178. Assuming that's your way of saying

179. you're the most distinguished

180. 'ambitious student at your school'

181. then they're all Blair Waldorfs.

182. From Princeton, Yale

183. 'Penn and Parsons.'

184. - Here you are. - Mm-hmm.

185. 'This must be our sixth and final intern.'

186. Oh, I think there must be some mistake.

187. Daniel Humphrey, NYU?

188. 'I'm Epperly Lawrence, your supervisor.'

189. Welcome to "W."

190. Nothing says January

191. like a brand new cold war.

192. Hey. Um, Mrs. Humphrey?

193. Oh, Jonathan, hello.

194. Eric left this in class the other day.

195. - I thought he might need it. - Oh, that is so considerate.

196. Jonathan, how are you? I haven't seen you since you—

197. Eric and I broke up, probably.

198. Well, not that I see my son much these days either.

199. He's been with Elliot nonstop since they got back from Gstaad.

200. What?

201. Elliot broke up with Eric

202. over the holidays.

203. It's all anyone was talking about

204. the first day back at school.

205. But Eric slept at his place last night.

206. Hey.

207. Brought you some coffee.

208. She looks a little lost.

209. Can I... help you, miss?

210. Um, no, thank you.

211. I'm just here to bring something to a friend

212. but I think I have the wrong address.

213. Is your friend an ex-con?

214. Then you're in the right place.

215. 'This is a halfway house.'

216. 'Focus on your work ethic, not to your wardrobe.'

217. "W" is about more than just fashion and beauty.

218. We do probing interviews, an art issue.

219. We're looking for visionaries.

220. Get out of here, Humphrey.

221. - This is my world. - I can't just quit.

222. When Lily said Conde Nast, I figured

223. she meant "Vanity Fair" or "The New Yorker"

224. but that doesn't mean she didn't pull every string

225. she had on my behalf.

226. Turns out it's easier to get a guy parole

227. that it is to get a magazine internship in this town.

228. You don't know the difference

229. between Rodarte and road kill.

230. - You'll be guillotined. - We're interns.

231. I may not know couture, but I know how to collate.

232. And I know how to staple, so stay out of my way

233. or I'll use one to attach your tongue to your shoulder blade.

234. Blair?

235. I'm sorry.

236. Dan here was just telling me

237. how much he'd love to work for "The New Yorker."

238. Oh, that's right. You're the writer.

239. Maybe you could do something special for our new blog

240. we're announcing tonight at the party

241. 'uh, books, movies, "Fashion On Film."'

242. This month we'll be in celebration

243. of contemporary authors

244. and Lynn Hirschberg is writing the intro.

245. I'll be sure to introduce you.

246. Wow. Thank you.

247. Jonathan? What are you doing here?

248. Where were you last night? And don't say Elliot's.

249. I called over there and spoke to his mother.

250. Well, I was with a friend.

251. Why didn't you tell me that you two broke up?

252. I didn't wanna share a huge fact from my life.

253. I wonder where I got that gene from.

254. Now you listen to me—

255. Lily, could I maybe talk to Eric alone?

256. Fine.

257. Are you okay?

258. What's going on with you and your mother?

259. Oh. Now you care.

260. 'Cause you didn't when you dumped me.

261. I was angry, and rightly so, but..

262. I've always cared, and you know that.

263. It's my family, and..

264. and Elliot, and it's just been..

265. a rough few weeks for me.

266. But I missed having you in my life.

267. Well, I'm here now.

268. Uh, your mother said you guys were going

269. to some party tonight.

270. Is there any chance you'd wanna bring someone along

271. to be there for you help keep the peace?

272. Make fun of everyone we see?

273. Yeah, that sounds perfect.

274. - No, I don't know. - There.

275. On top?

276. - Okay, I'll let her know. - What'd he say?

277. These strappy Zanottis would look great

278. with your sweaty gym socks.

279. Epperly asked me to pull the lemon Louboutins.

280. Oh. You poor lost lamb.

281. Let me help you.

282. I didn't date Serena van der Woodsen

283. for two years and not come away knowing

284. that those are Marc Jacobs, and they're mustard.

285. Ugh! Why does this taste like Chanel No. 5?

286. 'Hey, I was, uh, just getting myself a cappuccino.'

287. I thought you might like one, too.

288. The nutmeg foam, that's a Humphrey touch.

289. My dad used to own a coffee bar.

290. Thank you, Daniel. That's very thoughtful.

291. Who's got a stapler?

292. Give it up, Blair. I'm actually good at this.

293. And unlike the other interns, I know you.

294. Your stupid tricks won't work.

295. Oh, look, it's Georgina's baby.

296. Ow.

297. Where have you been? I've been calling you.

298. Your parole officer told me you missed another job interview.

299. I didn't wanna tell you until everything was settled.

300. I have incredible news.

301. I got a job. A real job.

302. As a financial advisor in a top-tier company.

303. You serious? Dad, that's great.

304. I never thought it would happen again.

305. The suits, the business lunches

306. the ability to pay my own hotel bills.

307. I can't stop pinching myself.

308. - What's the firm? - Thorpe Enterprises.

309. I'll be working with Russell Thorpe himself.

310. See you later, pal.

311. Hey, Chuck.

312. Did I just walk past your dad in a $2,000 suit?

313. Seems The Captain, who could barely get an interview

314. for a custodial position, got a big executive job

315. with the guy trying to buy your company.

316. So, how are you enjoying your first day?

317. Well, what should have been perfection

318. has now been tainted by a run-in

319. with Brookyln's Benedict Arnold.

320. How am I a traitor?

321. The only reason you're still here is 'cause

322. no one has ratted out your attempts

323. at sabotage to Epperly.

324. And the only reason you're still here

325. is because no one's asked you, "Who's Givenchy?"

326. 'Lynn Hirschberg's flight from Dublin got canceled.'

327. I knew Stefano should've made that Colin Farrell interview

328. a phoner instead.

329. Hirschberg's out.

330. Major disaster.

331. Unless someone..

332. shows up with a new author

333. and saves the day.

334. Yes.

335. And when she does, she will shine

336. as the best intern.

337. And her insipid competition will be fired.

338. You do realize that I know Jeremiah Harris

339. personally, right?

340. And you do realize that I know everyone personally, right?

341. Okay, so then we'll both show up with our authors

342. tonight at the party, and whoever Epperly decides

343. is the best fit for "W" wins, the other resigns.

344. I can agree to that.

345. It's gotta be a clean fight.

346. Do you understand that, as a concept? No sabotage?

347. I can't wait to see you bleeding on the rack.

348. But yes, no sabotage.

349. Hey, is Eric here? I'm supposed to take him to lunch.

350. Oh, he's brooding in his room.

351. Here. Vanya asked me to give this to you.

352. What is it?

353. - Everything okay, Lily? - Yes, it's nothing.

354. - I'll deal with it later. - Oh, come on, mom.

355. We're all trying to move forward here.

356. - No more secrets. - Well, it's not a secret.

357. In fact, I have no idea what it is or who it's from.

358. Then what's the big deal about opening it in front of us?

359. This was for Ben.

360. "Please use this money to start a new life

361. far away from me and my family."

362. Charming, mom.

363. Seems Serena's getting

364. frosty with her mother

365. over an envelope of cold-hard cash.

366. Looks like not everything or everyone's

367. on sale this January.

368. Well, at least now I know why Ben lied.

369. 'He doesn't wanna have anything to do with me because'

370. I'm the daughter of the person that ruined

371. the last three years of his life

372. and is trying to ruin the rest of it.

373. $30,000 would hardly ruin his life.

374. You said you were gonna help Ben find an apartment

375. not pay him to disappear.

376. 'Mom paid someone off again.'

377. Well, we should make this a drinking game.

378. Ben Donovan has information that can ruin this family.

379. What's wrong with not wanting him around?

380. Because he's blameless.

381. Because he was a wonderful teacher

382. who can't do what he loves thanks to you

383. and because he deserves more.

384. I'm goin' out.

385. I'm right behind you.

386. Yeah. Hold the elevator.

387. Well, I did a little Humphrey smooth talking

388. and Jeremiah Harris said he'd be delighted to come

389. so I'm just gonna add his name to the list real quick.

390. Oh! Well, you can put him under Lorrie Moore, my author.

391. He'll be most comfortable there.

392. I don't think so, uh..

393. before Jeremiah Harris was a novelist

394. he wrote film reviews for "Vanity Fair."

395. And he had a wine column in "Bon Appetit"

396. and Stefano also knows him from the "Times."

397. So?

398. Lorrie Moore was a 2010 finalist

399. for the PEN/Faulkner Award.

400. True. Maybe she is a better get.

401. Oh, but did I mention that Jeremiah

402. is on the board of admissions at Williams

403. where Stefano's niece is applying to college?

404. So glad you called. Afternooners are my favorite.

405. I thought you said you were totally above board

406. when it comes to business.

407. I did... and I am.

408. So why did you hire my best friend's father

409. to work for your company?

410. The Captain?

411. He and my dad are old friends.

412. My father believes in second chances

413. and we need someone who knows the lay of the land.

414. His son's my roommate. It's an obvious conflict.

415. Chuck, we just met.

416. I had no idea who you live with.

417. I know that you're sensitive to this

418. I assure you, Thorpe Enterprises has no interest

419. in corporate espionage.

420. Even so, I spoke to Nate. The Captain's a loose cannon.

421. I'd consider it a personal favor

422. if you'd have him fired.

423. Now, what were you saying about afternooners?

424. Actually, I just remembered I have a meeting.

425. Sorry, Chuck.

426. 'Your mother might be up to her old tricks'

427. 'but maybe it's best for Ben'

428. 'to get a fresh start without you.'

429. Maybe. I don't know.

430. I just don't want to go down without a fight.

431. Speaking of fights, I'm at full-on war with Humphrey.

432. 'B, I know you like to turn'

433. everything into a contest, but surely

434. Dan isn't your biggest competition at "W."

435. All the other girls are variations on a theme.

436. And that theme is slightly lesser versions of me.

437. But... uh, Dan is a writer.

438. He makes delicious coffee.

439. 'Never mind the fact that'

440. 'he's not a completely horrible-looking straight guy'

441. 'working at a fashion magazine.'

442. He's got the whole office buzzing.

443. Sounds like someone's feeling a little threatened.

444. Well, not for long.

445. My author will make his look like

446. a monkey with a typewriter

447. or maybe an invisible monkey with a typewriter.

448. B, I hear scheming in your voice.

449. - You cannot sabotage him. - Why not?

450. I'm not gonna treat him any better

451. than all my other enemies just because

452. you sporadically love him.

453. 'He's not your enemy.'

454. Earn the spotlight on your own merits.

455. - You'll feel better. - Well, I'll call you later.

456. Let Ben go.

457. Let Dan be.

458. Oh, picking up a late lunch for Epperly?

459. No. Actually, it's for you. Don't worry. It's not poisoned.

460. I wouldn't wanna win due to my rival's starvation

461. and I figured you were too much of a food snob

462. to deign to eat at the commissary.

463. And Epperly needs me to alphabetize. Duty calls.

464. Fancy seeing you here, Mr. Donovan.

465. Damien Dalgaard.

466. I heard you went to the pokey for poking a student.

467. Congratulations on getting out.

468. Sure you've been doing a lot of celebrating, yeah?

469. Wanna buy some party favors?

470. So it's true.

471. Strait-laced academic star became a dealer.

472. Guilty.

473. I remember that paper you wrote

474. comparing "The Wire" to "The Iliad."

475. Did not intend for English comp

476. to be an occupational training course.

477. Well, you always said what we learned in high school

478. would inform our futures in unexpected ways.

479. Yeah, the thing with "The Wire"

480. is the witnesses usually had evidence

481. before they testified.

482. I know you were the one who said you saw

483. me and Serena at that B and B.

484. I told the truth.

485. Nothing happened between me and Serena that night.

486. But I went to prison anyway.

487. You say potato. Judge says pedophile.

488. Well, it's been great catching up

489. Mr. D, but my friend just arrived.

490. I'd introduce you, but you may or may not have

491. statutorily raped his sister.

492. Might be a tad awkward.

493. Let's go. Get a table.

494. Good job today.

495. I think you could be a great fit here

496. 'provided you survive.'

497. I try and stay out of the intern drama

498. but I couldn't help but notice your friend Blair

499. is a little competitive.

500. I don't know what you're talking about.

501. I admire your loyalty.

502. 'Maybe the striver thing is all an act'

503. 'and-and maybe it's just a coincidence'

504. that my coffee tasted like her perfume.

505. I'm sure you know her better than I do.

506. Yeah, I do know her.

507. I know that her kindergarten yearbook quote

508. is "The best defense is a good offense."

509. Hi, uh, Ms. Moore, I'm an assistant at "W"

510. and I'm afraid there has been a terrible mix-up.

511. Careful, D, it's flu season

512. but nothing's more contagious than mistrust.

513. I'll be right back. One second.

514. Uh, where's mom?

515. She's still licking her wounds.

516. We were all pretty hard on her this afternoon.

517. I never would have come to a party like this without her

518. but I needed some air.

519. Oh, hey, I get it.

520. Being in a room with a selfish manipulator

521. can really suck the life out of you.

522. She's worried.

523. She's just trying to protect her family.

524. Hey.

525. You two have a good time. I'll see you later.

526. Great party.

527. Are you hungry? There's appetizers.

528. Yes, yeah. I'm gonna, I'll grab us some, yeah?

529. Thakery, Imoon, enjoy your treats.

530. Um, I need to talk to you.

531. Chuck Bass and no guest. You may enter.

532. Blair Waldorf working the door?

533. I got an internship at "W."

534. Well, knowing you, you'll be editor by May.

535. - Your plan's working. - So it seems to be.

536. Ben, you came.

537. Thank you for meeting me here. Can we talk?

538. Serena, I'm actually here because I saw your brother Eric

539. with Damien Dalgaard

540. who we both know is a drug dealer.

541. No. No, no. Eric hates Damien. And he doesn't do drugs.

542. So there, there must be some sort of explanation.

543. Jonathan. Hey.

544. By any chance, have you seen Eric?

545. Eric? No.

546. The guy should become a magician.

547. He disappeared.

548. I thought we were here on a date.

549. I guess I'm getting played once again.

550. I'm sorry. A date? What about Elliot?

551. Elliot dumped him.

552. 'He didn't tell you?'

553. He promised me he was over his Jenny Humphrey phase.

554. I guess he was wrong..

555. or maybe I was, for believing him.

556. It'll be okay. Come on. Let's find him.

557. Lorrie is a bit late

558. but she'll be here any minute.

559. I hope Jeremiah brought his A game.

560. No, he's not here yet either.

561. Any reason you think he might be late?

562. The guy is a famous recluse.

563. He might not show up at all. It's your fault for picking him.

564. My fa.. Oh, you've got to be kidding me.

565. We said no sabotaging.

566. What are you talking about?

567. Jeremiah. Hi.

568. Mr. Humphrey, show me to the bar.

569. I warn you, if the Krug is warmer than 55 degrees

570. I'm leaving.

571. Jeremiah Harris?

572. Epperly Lawrence.

573. Yes. How do you do?

574. Daniel told me you were in a bit of a bind.

575. Nice. Let's get you a glass of champagne.

576. 'I'll tell you all about our plans.'

577. OMG.

578. I was just poleaxed by a poor person.

579. Fancy seeing you here.

580. Chuck, this is Stuart Fuji. He's in the film business.

581. Stuart, can I borrow her for a moment?

582. What are you doing with that bore?

583. Let's get out of here.

584. Actually, I'm having a nice time.

585. Stuart understands that when I say I'm telling the truth..

586. I am.

587. Raina, you're trying to take my company.

588. How can I just trust you?

589. You'd think less of me if I did.

590. I couldn't think less of you than I do right now.

591. Sorry.

592. I wouldn't be like this

593. if it wasn't my father's legacy.

594. Stakes are too high to take a chance on trust.

595. Hey. It's just business.

596. From now on..

597. I don't even know if we have that to discuss.

598. Maybe Eric went home. He doesn't really like parties anyway.

599. He can't be buying from Damien.

600. Come on.

601. Your sister just clocked us.

602. Okay, wh-what do we do?

603. Just go with me on this one.

604. Well, I'm gonna go get a drink. Would you like anything, babe?

605. Uh..

606. So you're Damien's babe now?

607. You... Williamsburg weasel!

608. I can't believe you stabbed me in the back.

609. I only did it because I thought you did the same to me.

610. Hillary Clinton is one of my role models.

611. I do not break treaties, you ass, but I do secure borders.

612. So I'm gonna go tell Epperly what you did right now.

613. No. Blair, wait.

614. Look, we can, we can figure something out.

615. Let go of me, you classless cling-on.

616. Blair, do not go to Epperly. I need this job, alright?

617. No!

618. Uh. Whoa.

619. - Aah! - Oh!

620. Aah!

621. Oh, no.

622. - Oh, is that.. - Stefano Tonchi.

623. I'm on the list.

624. Spotted, dubious friends in definite hot water.

625. Obviously, you're both fired.

626. 'Go back to the office and pack your things.'

627. Looks like "W" just left Dan and Blair

628. both out in the cold.

629. I just got an interesting phone call from Raina Thorpe.

630. 'Did you tell Chuck to have me fired?'

631. Let me guess.

632. Uh, you thought I'd embarrass you.

633. The Thorpe's were trying to take over Bass Industries.

634. We thought they might be using you just to get information.

635. I'm a grown man, Nate

636. and I'm actually good at what I do.

637. Chuck is family, I would never do anything

638. to jeopardize things for him.

639. You do realize that's a total contradiction, though

640. being Chuck's family and then working for the Thorpes?

641. Word around the office is that he's banging Thorpe's daughter.

642. Talk about sleeping with the enemy.

643. But that's Chuck's decision, okay?

644. And whatever happens with Raina is on him and him alone.

645. You need the second chance.

646. You can't go down in another scandal.

647. So you're getting me fired instead?

648. Lo..

649. All those nights in prison

650. when I thought I couldn't take it

651. when I wanted to quit or die or..

652. I didn't, because I knew there was still

653. one person out there who believed in me.

654. - Dad, you'll get another job. - Yeah, washing toilets.

655. You know what?

656. I-I think I'd rather live in a halfway house

657. than live with someone who only halfway trusts me.

658. Come on. It was just an internship.

659. I'm sure you can have your mother call

660. and get you a new one in a second.

661. My mother didn't get me "W."

662. She's a designer.

663. She can't call in favors

664. from a fashion magazine.

665. You don't get jobs like this

666. without a connection.

667. Well, I did.

668. I practically stalked Stefano.

669. 'Spent the night at his lobby waiting to meet him.'

670. And after the police escorted me out for the third time

671. I faxed a letter to every machine in the building.

672. That's like 200 fax machines.

673. Three hundred thirty-two.

674. Wow, Blair, I'm so sorry.

675. I didn't know any of this.

676. What, the fact that

677. you were willfully ignorant

678. is supposed to make me feel better?

679. You wanted an internship. I wanted this one.

680. So why didn't you just sabotage me?

681. You had, you had every opportunity.

682. Guess I must have some undiagnosed brain injury

683. because I stupidly thought that this fake friendship

684. might be real.

685. Damien Dalgaard, of all people.

686. You know what kind of person he is.

687. Oh, so now you wanna get all sisterly?

688. You're dating a demon.

689. Can't you see he's using you like he did Jenny?

690. Why? 'Cause nobody could ever like me for me?

691. Hey, I know what it feels like

692. when you think you got no one to turn to.

693. - Who the hell are you? - I'm Ben, Serena's—

694. Non-rapist but still technically ex-con, former teacher.

695. You have taken up a lot of time

696. over the dinner table at our house.

697. I'm sure all that drama has been overshadowing

698. what's going on in everyone else's life, especially yours.

699. No offense, man, but mind your own business.

700. When I got locked up, I..

701. befriended some not very good guys.

702. Found out the hard way.

703. 'When you do things that betray who you are'

704. it can become very difficult to recognize yourself.

705. I don't wanna see that happen to you.

706. Please, Eric.

707. Mom did this awful thing

708. and-and you went away to Ostroff

709. and I was looking so forward to just being away with Elliot

710. and having somebody to talk to and then he broke up with me

711. and I didn't have anybody.

712. - You'll always have me. - No, I didn't.

713. You were off chasing some judge

714. trying to help him.

715. I don't want to feel sad.

716. I didn't wanna feel anything and the one thing about Damien

717. is he is a good distraction, but..

718. You're right.

719. Thank you. I won't see him anymore.

720. Um, Serena, can I speak to you?

721. It's okay. I gotta go anyway.

722. What Juliet did, has it crossed your mind

723. that Ben was at least partially responsible?

724. He wanted revenge because he thought I put him in prison.

725. But that's in the past.

726. You know, he just gave Eric

727. some really fatherly advice, helped convince him

728. to stay away from Damien Dalgaard.

729. Damien?

730. Look, I would love to explain

731. but I need to find Ben right now.

732. Epperly, uh, it's Dan Humphrey.

733. I know I ruined your party

734. and humiliated your boss and there's no reason

735. for you to want to listen to me right now

736. but I-I got to tell you something.

737. Eric.

738. I just heard that you've been hanging out with Damien.

739. Are you doing drugs?

740. You know, I could lie and say no.

741. Um... but I bought sleeping pills.

742. And then I needed Adderall to wake back up

743. but that was it, and, um..

744. It was stupid, and I'm done with it.

745. If you need help, I wanna make sure you get it.

746. No, I don't care about the drugs.

747. Damien was just there when no one else would listen.

748. Ben, wait. Please don't avoid me.

749. I wanna be your friend.

750. Serena, it's a lot easier for me to start over

751. without any reminders from my past.

752. But why?

753. I saw you talking to Eric

754. and it reminded me of what you were like

755. at boarding school.

756. I'm not that person anymore.

757. Yes, you are.

758. You wanna know why I've been avoiding you?

759. Because I see that look in your eye

760. and I know exactly what it means.

761. But I don't wanna be with you.

762. I didn't reciprocate back then, and I don't now.

763. I'm sorry.

764. Sorry, S.

765. Looks like the only thing

766. you'll be snuggling up with

767. this winter are warm memories.

768. I'm not heartbroken. I'm humiliated.

769. I was falling for someone who wants nothing to do with me.

770. And I thought I found my calling

771. and now the only thing that brings me any joy

772. is planning Dan Humphrey's long, slow demise.

773. - Epperly? - It's 9:20. Where are you?

774. W-what are you talking about? You fired me.

775. Yes, and then Dan confessed that you were the one

776. who called Jeremiah and he took credit for it

777. and then staged that whole wrestling stunt

778. to embarrass you.

779. 'I was totally wrong about him.'

780. 'If you're gonna be a backstabber'

781. 'just stab some backs, you know?'

782. Are you saying..

783. That Alex White is styling eight looks today

784. and I need someone to steam the couture?

785. - Yes. - I'll be there in 15.

786. You know what I just remembered?

787. If you really want something

788. you don't stop for anyone

789. or anything until you get it.

790. Thanks for meeting me.

791. Serena told me how helpful you were with Eric yesterday.

792. Just saying what I thought.

793. Ben, I realize my wife hasn't treated you justly in any way.

794. 'I'd like to help.'

795. You're not gonna offer me more money, are you?

796. You deserve a real shot at getting back on your feet again.

797. 'And that's gonna be tough to do living in a halfway house.'

798. I have an extra room at my loft

799. and I-I'd love it if you moved in.

800. After everything that's happened

801. it's the least we could do.

802. I haven't experienced a lot of kindness lately.

803. I gotta think about it, but... sounds good.

804. Take your time.

805. 'Hi. Could you connect me to room 312, please?'

806. Howard Archibald.

807. What do you mean, he's checked out?

808. Yeah.

809. This winter..

810. Thank you.

811. even though we bundle up

812. a cold shoulder can freeze us out.

813. I heard about what young Bass asked Raina to do.

814. It's terrible.

815. Well, I'm just thankful she gave me the heads up

816. and you gave me a chance to talk.

817. We're old friends.

818. And you're doing a bang-up job.

819. I, uh, should've told you about my plans

820. for Bass Industries, but I didn't wanna put you

821. in a compromising position.

822. I completely understand, and I can assure you

823. there are no conflicts anymore.

824. Whatever you need, I'm your guy.

825. What are you doing here?

826. I was wrong to ask you

827. to fire The Captain.

828. Stuart, a moment?

829. Yes, you were.

830. I told you who I was when we met.

831. I don't play games

832. in business or in my personal life.

833. My father is gonna do everything humanly possible

834. to acquire Bass Industries.

835. It's not a secret. It's a fact.

836. I know. I apologize for losing sight of that.

837. Look, you're a beautiful girl who says what's on her mind

838. and isn't afraid of the consequences.

839. I don't want to stop seeing you.

840. I can handle the complications if you can.

841. Hmm, I think complications

842. are the least of what I can handle.

843. But..

844. there is a man in a towel..

845. in my bathroom right now.

846. So..

847. maybe another time?

848. You look good here.

849. Guess it turns out your friend wasn't worthy.

850. Tell me about it.

851. I've been trying to convince people for years.

852. But just so you know, he was never really my friend.

853. Sometimes a ray of sun shines in and gives us hope.

854. I offered Ben the apartment, and he's thinking about it.

855. Thank you so much, Rufus.

856. We're just not gonna take no for an answer.

857. 'Ben is still a good person. I-I know he is.'

858. Consider this a warning. Stay away from Serena.

859. Stay away from her family. I remember your father.

860. And I think we both know how he would respond to your dealing

861. if someone were to tell him.

862. What do you care, huh?

863. Those people ruined your life, not me.

864. You actually like her.

865. How I feel about Serena

866. is none of your damn business.

867. The only thing you should be

868. worried about is disappearing.

869. Hey. What are you doing right now?

870. 'Sorry, Damien, but I'm done with the pills.'

871. No, that's not what I meant.

872. You wanna hang out?

873. As friends.

874. But on the Upper East Side

875. the slipperiest ice..

876. - Uh, sure. Why not? - Good.

877. is usually right in front of us.

878. Good.

879. XOXO.

880. Gossip Girl.