1. Gossip girl
here—your one and only sourceCopy !req
2. but those pills were
antibiotics.Copy !req
3. Dad. Look, i can explain.
Get your things
and come with me.Copy !req
4. We're going home, to Brooklyn.
If Dr. Van Der Woodsen
loves your motherCopy !req
5. as much as he said he did,
then maybe there's somethingCopy !req
6. she should know about Rufus.
I want to talk to you
about Lily.Copy !req
7. Obviously, I'm not a doctor,
but there's something weirdCopy !req
8. about her medicine.
Name's Cameron.Copy !req
9. Blair.
Do you want to make that guy
who showed up jealous or what?Copy !req
10. I'm game if you are.
- I'm game.Copy !req
11. And who am i?Copy !req
12. That's a secret
I'll never tell.Copy !req
13. You know you love me.Copy !req
14. X.O.X.O., gossip girl.Copy !req
15. New day, new designer.Copy !req
16. Whether it's love or war
you're outfitting for,Copy !req
17. thank god for friends
and fashion.Copy !req
18. That one looks good.Copy !req
19. Chuck and i played
"wuthering heights" in it.Copy !req
20. I mean, who starts a courtship
during the day anyway?Copy !req
21. Humans who venture out in light
and aren't named "bass."Copy !req
22. Serena, i have to tell you
something.Copy !req
23. What's wrong?Copy !req
24. I've never been on a date.Copy !req
25. What about Chuck? And Nate?Copy !req
26. And Chuck.
And then Nate again.Copy !req
27. No, i mean on a real date,Copy !req
28. with someone i didn't know
already or who wasn'tCopy !req
29. a British lord masquerading
as a college student.
B., obviously, Cameron liked youCopy !req
30. when he met you
at the loft party.Copy !req
31. Just be yourself and have fun.
And try the Marc Jacobs.Copy !req
32. I have to go.
- What's going on?Copy !req
33. You haven't lusted after
a Louboutin all morning.Copy !req
34. I just have to get home.Copy !req
35. Is it Lily?Copy !req
36. I think Rufus cheated on her.Copy !req
37. Oh, my god. I'm so sorry.Copy !req
38. I didn't know they even had
groupies that old.Copy !req
39. They met at
the rooftop garden committee.Copy !req
40. Well, how is your mom
taking it?Copy !req
41. She doesn't know.
I told my dad,Copy !req
42. and he thought it would be best
if we waited to tell her.Copy !req
43. Stress isn't good
for her condition.Copy !req
44. Well, is there
anything i can do?Copy !req
45. Dorota's family has
Polish mob connections.Copy !req
46. No.
Thank you, though.Copy !req
47. I'm just hoping Rufus will stay
away until she gets stronger.Copy !req
48. And, b., i don't knowCopy !req
49. if handcuffs are a good idea
for a first date.Copy !req
50. it's a good thing you're not
a drug dealer anymore.Copy !req
51. That girl you sold
Lily's fake oxy toCopy !req
52. wanted double what she paid
just to give me the bottle back.Copy !req
53. So what'd you find out?Copy !req
54. My personal pharmacist
is looking into it.
Do you trust him to knowCopy !req
55. if they're bad for Lily?
He appreciates
a fine pharmaceutical.Copy !req
56. And why are you whispering?Copy !req
57. If it's a seduction technique,
don't bother.Copy !req
58. Ew. You wish.Copy !req
59. No, i-I'm—I'm grounded again.
Shocker, i know.Copy !req
60. But I'm—I'm not supposed
to use the phone.Copy !req
61. Fine. Well, I'll let you knowCopy !req
62. when i hear something
about the antibiotics.Copy !req
63. Okay. Cool.Copy !req
64. - You give someone
something?Copy !req
65. Hmm. Only hours and hours
of enjoyment.Copy !req
66. Thank you for that visual.
Look, I'm gonna go see Serena.Copy !req
67. Does this mean she's finally out
from under her father's spell?Copy !req
68. No, Serena's in a good place.
I mean, after palm beach,Copy !req
69. she stopped running away
or keeping secrets.Copy !req
70. I'm glad.Copy !req
71. Oh, um, say hello to Blair
for me.Copy !req
72. I hope she has a great day.Copy !req
73. Okay, do not do anything
to mess with her date, please.Copy !req
74. Her date?Copy !req
75. With whom?Copy !req
76. You serious?Copy !req
77. You have all your spies,
and you had to get it out of me?Copy !req
78. Come on. You finally stopped
defiling the pool tableCopy !req
79. with the entire cast
of cirque du soleil.Copy !req
80. You got Blair into Columbia.Copy !req
81. Why not let things end
on a good note?Copy !req
82. Look, i need to take this.
And don't worry.Copy !req
83. I have more important concerns
than Blair's social life.Copy !req
84. Hey. So what can you tell me
about the pills?Copy !req
85. We went over this. The only
exception is schoolwork.Copy !req
86. Chuck bass is not giving you
your homework assignments.Copy !req
87. What? Dad, you can't take it.
I didn't even do anything wrong.Copy !req
88. Well, it's nice to know i can
spend my last night with VanessaCopy !req
89. and come home to my family,
fighting likeCopy !req
90. they still live here.
Don't know if you've heard,
but your sister's a drug dealer.Copy !req
91. Was. Past tense. And you
already grounded me for it.
Wait. Grounded to the loft?Copy !req
92. Lily said she needed some time,
so it was easierCopy !req
93. to bring Jenny here.
And Jenny would
much rather be here anyway.Copy !req
94. And Jenny's dad thinks it's time
for her to stop arguingCopy !req
95. and go do her homework.
And talking about yourselves
like you're not hereCopy !req
96. is helping how?
You know, i can't do
my homework without my books.Copy !req
97. I'll go to Lily's and bring them
back for you. Come with me?
Sure.Copy !req
98. Yeah, because Dan loves being
in the middle of these things.Copy !req
99. Special delivery.
- You know,Copy !req
100. I'm getting awfully spoiled
having a doctor in the house.Copy !req
101. Although i am looking forwardCopy !req
102. to drinking my apple juice
straight.Copy !req
103. I'm surprised you can even
stand the smell of that stuffCopy !req
104. after being pregnant
with Serena.
- You're right.Copy !req
105. I did drink an awful lot of it
during those months, didn't i?
And not just apple juice,Copy !req
106. that green apple juice from
that place down in the village.Copy !req
107. What was it called again?
I used to make you go
all the way downtownCopy !req
108. to get it for me.
You didn't make me.
I'd go down there right nowCopy !req
109. if the juice craze
wasn't over.Copy !req
110. About that speech—Copy !req
111. d-don't—don't even say it.Copy !req
112. I'm sorry. I just got
caught up in the moment,Copy !req
113. and it came out all wrong.Copy !req
114. I was hoping
that's what had happened.Copy !req
115. And I'm—I'm just so thrilled
to get to know the kids.Copy !req
116. You've just done
such an amazing job, Lily.Copy !req
117. Really. You know,
you—you and Rufus.Copy !req
118. Thank you.Copy !req
119. I honestly don't knowCopy !req
120. how we'd be getting through
all of this without you.Copy !req
121. Oh, which reminds me—Copy !req
122. those homeopathic remedies are
clogging up my humidifier.Copy !req
123. Want to check it out?
- Yeah.Copy !req
124. Hello?
You didn't answer your cell.Copy !req
125. You mean my dad didn't.
He took it.Copy !req
126. Lily's pills are
ivermectin.Copy !req
127. They're great
at battling parasitesCopy !req
128. and African river blindness,Copy !req
129. but lymphoma, not so much.
Well, is it dangerous?Copy !req
130. I mean, does she know
what she's taking?Copy !req
131. I don't remember what it said.
The date and the drug store
were still legible,Copy !req
132. which was enough to track down
the prescribing doctor.Copy !req
133. Luckily, pharmacists don't make
enough to turn down bribes.Copy !req
134. Okay, so what's next?Copy !req
135. The mission requires
an expert,Copy !req
136. someone highly trainedCopy !req
137. in the art
of extorting information.Copy !req
138. You're not seriouslyCopy !req
139. gonna use this
to try to get back with Blair.Copy !req
140. My priority is the truth.Copy !req
141. to make sure she doesn't
move on. All right, i get it.Copy !req
142. Let's just hope she's willing
to make herself available.Copy !req
143. Meet me at the Waldorfs'.
But wait. I'm...Copy !req
144. Grounded.Copy !req
145. Hey, lil?Copy !req
146. Rufus, i didn't know
you were coming over.Copy !req
147. Yeah, we're just picking up
Jenny's schoolbooks.
They're in her old room.Copy !req
148. I thought my mom told you
she needed some time.Copy !req
149. I just want to check in
and make sure we're still onCopy !req
150. then she would call you back.
You should leave.Copy !req
151. Serena, does she have a problem
seeing me or is it you?Copy !req
152. Holland told me what happened.
About the sublet?
I told you already.Copy !req
153. I didn't want your dad living
in the same building.
- You know it's not about that.Copy !req
154. Rufus.
What's going on?Copy !req
155. I honestly don't know.Copy !req
156. Um, Serena,
what did Holland tell you?Copy !req
157. Why don't you just leave?Copy !req
158. You know what?
Why don't we call Holland...Copy !req
159. And have her tell us herself?Copy !req
160. I don't know
what you want me to say.Copy !req
161. Well, Serena's
under the impressionCopy !req
162. that you know something
about something i did.Copy !req
163. I shouldn't be here.Copy !req
164. Come on. I have nothing
to hide from my family.Copy !req
165. Just tell them the truth.Copy !req
166. Rufus and i slept together.Copy !req
167. Talk about love thy neighbor.Copy !req
168. What?
I'm sorry.Copy !req
169. Next time, Rufus, choose one
who knows how to keep a secret.Copy !req
170. This is absurd.Copy !req
171. Mom, I'm sorry. I didn't want
you to find out like this.Copy !req
172. let me handle this?
Thank you, William.
I'm gonna take you up on that.Copy !req
173. Lily.
- Rufus.Copy !req
174. Dad.
- I'm sorry.
I never meant to hurt anyone.Copy !req
175. and lie to their faces.
You just did.Copy !req
176. You asked me to come up here.Copy !req
177. You had to know
it was going to happen.
Excuse me. Holland, right?Copy !req
178. There's nothing to be sorry
about. Nothing happened.Copy !req
179. The only place I'm going is
to see my wife.Copy !req
180. What'd i miss?Copy !req
181. Lil, I'm sorry. I had no idea
she was an insane person.Copy !req
182. Look, i don't want
to discuss this with you.Copy !req
183. Wait.
You actually believe her?Copy !req
184. What does she have to gain,Copy !req
185. standing here, humiliating
herself in front of our family?Copy !req
186. I don't know
what the hell's going on.Copy !req
187. I just know she's lying.
Yeah, well, it'd be
a lot easier to believeCopy !req
188. if you hadn't left your scarf
in her apartment.Copy !req
189. We went over this. I told you,
nothing happened that night.
Rufus, you, of all people,Copy !req
190. could understand
why i might have a doubt.Copy !req
191. You didn't talk to me for weeks
after you foundCopy !req
192. that letter from William.
Lily, maybe you would do that,
but i wouldn't, and i didn't.Copy !req
193. When you're ready to hear that
and talk about it,Copy !req
194. give me a call.Copy !req
195. So... crazy day
at the Van Der woodsens', huh?Copy !req
196. I just wanted to keep Rufus away
until my mom got stronger.Copy !req
197. Well, you don't really think
he did this, do you?Copy !req
198. But i do know Rufus.
I mean, he took me inCopy !req
199. I'm just trying
to protect my mom.Copy !req
200. I get it, okay?
But just give him a chance.Copy !req
201. He gave you one
when you bailed on brown.Copy !req
202. Are you really taking his side
right now?Copy !req
203. I'm not taking sides.
We're just talking about it.Copy !req
204. Well, maybe that's not
such a good idea.Copy !req
205. I have to go
be with my family.Copy !req
206. I still don't see
why we need Blair for this.Copy !req
207. I mean, don't you read
"gossip girl"?Copy !req
208. Extortion's
what i do all day.Copy !req
209. This is more than
headbands and high school.Copy !req
210. The two of you here together?
Please tell meCopy !req
211. there's an explanation that
doesn't involve the apocalypse.Copy !req
212. We come in peace
and with a purpose.Copy !req
213. Something's going on
with Lily's medication.Copy !req
214. We need your mind game mastery
to find out what.Copy !req
215. Who are you, house?Copy !req
216. I'm sure Dr. Van Der Woodsen
knows what he's doing.Copy !req
217. It's not Van Der Woodsen.
It's a psychiatrist.Copy !req
218. I have an address.
It's weird, right?Copy !req
219. Lily so does not seem
like she's in therapy.
And you so should be.Copy !req
220. But as much as i admire
the attempt to lure me backCopy !req
221. with subversive sleuthing,Copy !req
222. and appreciative as i am
of your help with Columbia,Copy !req
223. the answer's no.Copy !req
224. Blair, i need to find outCopy !req
225. why someone doesn't want
Lily getting better.Copy !req
226. A heartfelt plea as well.Copy !req
227. And much more effective
than a fatwa.Copy !req
228. But you obviously already know
that i have a date today.Copy !req
229. And nothing you can dangle
will make me miss it.Copy !req
230. Next time,
don't bring Jenny Humphrey.Copy !req
231. I'm sorry you had to find out
about Rufus like that.Copy !req
232. I'm not sure.
Is that too honest?Copy !req
233. No. No, it makes sense.Copy !req
234. Well, you know,
after five marriages,Copy !req
235. the last thing
i want to do isCopy !req
236. put you and Serena
through another divorce.Copy !req
237. It might sound cold,
but they do get easier.Copy !req
238. Rufus is different,
you know?Copy !req
239. He's been like a father
to you.Copy !req
240. And i-i love him. But if you
think he cheated on you,Copy !req
241. you can't stay with him
because of me.Copy !req
242. You have to stay with him
because you still love himCopy !req
243. and because you think you guys
can work through this.Copy !req
244. It doesn't matter
who you end up withCopy !req
245. as long
as you're still here.Copy !req
246. Well, thanks
for coming with me, man.Copy !req
247. All right, and no matter
what Serena wants to believe,Copy !req
248. there's no way Rufus
would hurt Lily like that.Copy !req
249. before i tell her.
You're on dangerous ground
there.Copy !req
250. Yeah, but the only way to clean
up this mess, for everyone,Copy !req
251. is to find out the truth.
Yeah, well, i-i know. That's why
we need the help of an expert.Copy !req
252. Philosophy of war?Copy !req
253. Hmm. I'm finally home.Copy !req
254. Nate? Humphrey?Copy !req
255. Please don't tell me my mother
rehired you as a cater waiter.
I'm Dan.Copy !req
256. Cameron. Hey, Nate.
Great game last week.
Thanks. Sorry to interrupt.Copy !req
257. because they know
how supportive i am.Copy !req
258. Supportive, i.E. Scheming.Copy !req
259. Did... Chuck send you?Copy !req
260. His pill plan didn't work,
so he sent frick and frackCopy !req
261. to ruin my date?
No, Blair, this is
about my dad and Lily.Copy !req
262. This woman Holland has
accused him of... cheating.Copy !req
263. Wait a minute. An artist
or a hippie activist, maybe,Copy !req
264. but rooftop garden committee?Copy !req
265. I knew that something wasn't
right when Serena told me.Copy !req
266. No way would another
upper east sider shtup Rufus.Copy !req
267. My stepfather's Jewish.
Oh.Copy !req
268. Blair, we can't let Lily
leave Rufus. Will you help us?Copy !req
269. Exposing scandal
on the Upper East Side?Copy !req
270. Show me your world,
Blair Waldorf.Copy !req
271. They'd be lost without me.Copy !req
272. Tell me everything you know
about this Holland person.Copy !req
273. Trust me. I live
with the Van Der woodsens.Copy !req
274. I learned how to lie.Copy !req
275. Can i help you?
We're here to see Dr. kemble.Copy !req
276. Did you have an appointment?Copy !req
277. Well, i work
for a troubled teen hotline,Copy !req
278. and I'm really worried that
i said some wrong things aboutCopy !req
279. drugs and depression, and was
hoping that Dr. kemble couldCopy !req
280. actually give me some advice.
Of course. The doctor
will be back next week.Copy !req
281. Next week...
Will be fine. Thank you.Copy !req
282. And what brings you
and your mid-level entourage?Copy !req
283. Nothing personal.Copy !req
284. We're looking for Holland,
who claims she slept with Rufus.Copy !req
285. Let me guess—Copy !req
286. Dr. Holland kemble?Copy !req
287. You better hope
this doctor gets healedCopy !req
288. before someone else gets hurt.Copy !req
289. So what exactly
am i looking for?Copy !req
290. A bottle of pills,
like the one with the oxy—Copy !req
291. hopefully, with the label on
this time.Copy !req
292. Or something else that can
directly link them to Holland.Copy !req
293. Okay, i will rummage
and report.Copy !req
294. Holland is obviously trying
to poison Lily so she canCopy !req
295. have Rufus all to herself.
So shakespearean.Copy !req
296. Yeah. It's also
"fatal attraction."Copy !req
297. I just can't handle
dead bunnies.Copy !req
298. Maybe I'm stating
the obvious here,Copy !req
299. but shouldn't
we just tell Lily?
Tell her what?Copy !req
300. "Jenny tried to sell your
mislabeled meds, which somehowCopy !req
301. came from the woman who said
she slept with your husband"?Copy !req
302. No, we have to
get to Holland first.Copy !req
303. She's the one who can
connect all the dots,Copy !req
304. and then we go to Lily.
Holland will be
at the library benefit tonight.Copy !req
305. I saw it on the calendar.
Perfect. Public humiliation
always helpsCopy !req
306. when trying to elicit
a confession.
- We don't expect you to keep up.Copy !req
307. It's beyond
basic rugby strategy.
So hopefully, Jenny will findCopy !req
308. All right.
Rendezvous at my place.Copy !req
309. Dress is black-tie.
I'll have tickets.Copy !req
310. So...Copy !req
311. You guys do
this kind of thing a lot?Copy !req
312. Oh, yeah. A lot more
than you'd think.Copy !req
313. Last year, Georgina pretended
to be this rich CanadianCopy !req
314. to get poppy,
but things got all messed upCopy !req
315. when she turned her back
on Jesus.Copy !req
316. Yeah, but Dan doesn't
normally participate.Copy !req
317. So that's
your sorry-your-husband-Copy !req
318. was-cheating-on-you present—
a juicer?Copy !req
319. Trust me.
It'll make your mother smile.Copy !req
320. Sometimes
i wish she would haveCopy !req
321. let you take us away from here
when you wanted to.Copy !req
322. Tibet sounds pretty good
right now.
- Only if you don't get typhoid.Copy !req
323. Besides, wherever you run,
things still happen.Copy !req
324. All you can do is
try to learn from them.Copy !req
325. Well,
as awful as it's been,Copy !req
326. maybe mom needed thisCopy !req
327. to see that she wasn't
with the right man.Copy !req
328. I'm not gonna take advantage
of the situationCopy !req
329. to try to get closer
to your mother.Copy !req
330. Well, you have been there
throughout her entire sickness.Copy !req
331. And this whole thing with Rufus
could have happenedCopy !req
332. so that you could finally stop
hiding how you really feel.Copy !req
333. I feel happy to be
out shopping with my daughter,Copy !req
334. and to be able to spend
some timeCopy !req
335. with the people that i love.
Including mom.Copy !req
336. Serena.Copy !req
337. Good-bye.Copy !req
338. Hey.Copy !req
339. Why don't you do something
tonight to cheer her up?Copy !req
340. There's the library benefit.
You could invite her.Copy !req
341. Only if you come, too.Copy !req
342. What are you doing here?
No pills to steal in Brooklyn?Copy !req
343. I actually came by
to get a dress...Copy !req
344. As I'm sure you saw,
your stuff is by the front.Copy !req
345. And last time i checked,
dresses weren't in the kitchenCopy !req
346. near my mom's medicine.
Do you even know what
your dad's prescribing her?Copy !req
347. Probably something
with high street valueCopy !req
348. or you wouldn't be interested.
If you could just stop hating me
for, like, one second,Copy !req
349. you'd actually see i was
trying to help your family.Copy !req
350. Yeah, yeah. You and your dad
have done wonderful thingsCopy !req
351. for us Van Der woodsens.
Like it's been such
a banner year for the Humphreys?Copy !req
352. I would give it all back—
the clothes, the parties,Copy !req
353. the limo rides—just for one day
that felt normal.
Then why are you still here?Copy !req
354. You're right.Copy !req
355. Nothing would make me happierCopy !req
356. than to go back to Brooklyn
forever.Copy !req
357. Was that Jenny leaving? Were
you two fighting over Rufus?Copy !req
358. I don't want you kids
in the middle.
That was just Jenny.Copy !req
359. You know her—
all angst, all the time.Copy !req
360. Oh, god.Copy !req
361. You okay?
Do you want me to call dad?Copy !req
362. No, I'm fine.
I'm fine physically.Copy !req
363. Sitting around here is only
gonna make you worse.Copy !req
364. Dad invited us
to the library benefit tonight.Copy !req
365. Why don't we go with him?
Oh, my god. A juicer?Copy !req
366. Don't tell me...Copy !req
367. A night out with your father is
exactly what the doctor ordered.Copy !req
368. I'm sorry your new Beau
had to abandon our mission.Copy !req
369. Oh, he had a dinner
with his rugby team.
How homoerotic.Copy !req
370. You know how i love that.Copy !req
371. We have plans to continue
our date later.Copy !req
372. So are you all ready
to make the fat lady sing?Copy !req
373. I'll settle for making
the lying doctor lady confess.Copy !req
374. Oh, here's Nancy drew now.
Did you get our proof?Copy !req
375. Come on, Jenny.Copy !req
376. The future of our family is
riding on your sleuthing.Copy !req
377. I'm sorry. I looked everywhere,
but there was nothing.Copy !req
378. All right, what now?
If we don't have evidence,Copy !req
379. she has no reason
to tell us anything.
Well, luckily,Copy !req
380. like every great general,
i have contingency plans.Copy !req
381. Archibald, it's time to make use
of those family connections.Copy !req
382. Watch out, lonely boy.Copy !req
383. Seems your little sister
has her own ideasCopy !req
384. about your family's planning.Copy !req
385. Serena is here.
This complicates things.Copy !req
386. We have to avoid
them seeing us.Copy !req
387. S. Won't be on board,Copy !req
388. and we can't have a blonde
bombshell blowing up our plan.Copy !req
389. And the plan is we wait
for Nate and Dan to arriveCopy !req
390. His name is Dr. tabb, so pretend
you're well-bred and be polite.Copy !req
391. It'll pay off
if you ever needCopy !req
392. Blair and i will keep our eye
on Holland.Copy !req
393. Once our leverage arrives,
she'll either tell us the truthCopy !req
394. or we tell Dr. tabb,
and he revokes her license.Copy !req
395. I need a phone, too.
My dad took mine.Copy !req
396. Don't worry, little. J.Copy !req
397. You'll be back
on park Avenue in no time.Copy !req
398. What are you doing?Copy !req
399. Playing the part.
- Mnh-mnh.Copy !req
400. Hi. Uh, mount sinai orthopedic?Copy !req
401. Please let Dr. tabb know
that there's no need to wait.Copy !req
402. Uh, Nate Archibald
had a change of plansCopy !req
403. and won't be coming in tonight.
Thanks.Copy !req
404. You know, i have to say,
it's really nice to be hereCopy !req
405. with someone who doesn't
hate these sort of things.Copy !req
406. I have an idea.Copy !req
407. I've already had it.Copy !req
408. Dr. kemble, I've been dying
to get ahold of you.Copy !req
409. I've wanted to get him
to come to therapy for weeks.Copy !req
410. Dad,
what are you doing here?Copy !req
411. Serena called me,
but i was already on my way.Copy !req
412. I figured if my grounded
daughter goes missing,Copy !req
413. i just have to wait
till the next big partyCopy !req
414. to know where to find her.
Dad, i know you have no reason
to believe me,Copy !req
415. but this time I'm actually
trying to help you.
- Jenny, is Holland here? Oh, dad.Copy !req
416. I've been trying
to reach her all day.
Not a good idea.Copy !req
417. (Dan) And you don't have
a ticket.
- Dad, you're not even dressed.Copy !req
418. Serena.Copy !req
419. Serena.Copy !req
420. i know a scheme
when i see one.Copy !req
421. I assume Chuck and Blair
are here somewhere?Copy !req
422. Okay, yeah,
they're looking for Holland.Copy !req
423. What was i supposed to do?
I know Rufus did not do this.Copy !req
424. Oh, so that's it?Copy !req
425. Anyone who might not like
your dad has to go?Copy !req
426. Nate, all i asked you to do
was support me,Copy !req
427. and instead,
you went behind my back.Copy !req
428. It's not like that.
Look, i get
why everyone else did this.Copy !req
429. Dan and Jenny don't want to
believe that their dad cheated,Copy !req
430. Chuck will do anything
to get close to Blair,Copy !req
431. and Blair, as much as she wants
to, can't run away from a game.Copy !req
432. But you were supposed
to be on my side.Copy !req
433. As if watching
Audrey hepburn moviesCopy !req
434. isn't
manhood-shriveling enough,Copy !req
435. i now have to talk
about my feelings?Copy !req
436. Those movies are the only
romance i have in my life.Copy !req
437. Why don't you call
and make an appointment?
Please. Please.Copy !req
438. He traded me to his uncle...
For his hotel.Copy !req
439. Traded you?
- For sex.Copy !req
440. Please, is it any worse than you
tricking me into kissing a guyCopy !req
441. just so you can give a speech?
That's not the same.
He's kissed guys before.Copy !req
442. She slept with Jack...
My uncle.Copy !req
443. Clearly, you both
have hurt each other,Copy !req
444. and now neither of you
feel safe.
How can we rebuild?Copy !req
445. Ahem. Ahem. Ahem.Copy !req
446. It's going to take
a lot of hard workCopy !req
447. and a lot of time.Copy !req
448. Did i hear talk of games?
Please,
just make an appointment.Copy !req
449. Just one more thing—
that man over thereCopy !req
450. is on the a.M.A.
Disciplinary committee.Copy !req
451. Last time i checked,
it was illegalCopy !req
452. to prescribe
mislabeled medication,Copy !req
453. especially to those who
aren't even your patients.
What?Copy !req
454. You two really are sick.Copy !req
455. The person standing with him
is waiting for my signal,Copy !req
456. to show him i have proof of
what you did to Lily Humphrey.Copy !req
457. Just tell us why.
Are you in love with Rufus?Copy !req
458. They say psychiatrists
are the craziest ones.Copy !req
459. Blair?
What the hell is going on?Copy !req
460. Would you like to tell himCopy !req
461. or would you like
Dr. disciplinary to do it?Copy !req
462. I only wrote those prescriptions
because i owed someone a favor.Copy !req
463. The same someone who told you
say you slept with me?
The person you really needCopy !req
464. to talk to is
William Van Der Woodsen.Copy !req
465. Where's will?Copy !req
466. What's so important, Jenny?Copy !req
467. Holland's about to tell them
everything,Copy !req
468. if she hasn't already.
Tell who what?Copy !req
469. Everyone. The truth about you
and Holland working togetherCopy !req
470. to split up my dad and Lily.Copy !req
471. Jenny, I'm sorry. I know that
you love your father very much—Copy !req
472. which is why i understand
why you did it.Copy !req
473. And i don't blame you
for it either. It's just—Copy !req
474. if you're gonna get out of here,
you gotta go right now.Copy !req
475. Why are you
telling me this?Copy !req
476. So you can get
your family back,Copy !req
477. and i can get mine.Copy !req
478. Thanks for your help.
I'll call if i hear aboutCopy !req
479. any cater waiter positions,
all right?Copy !req
480. have you seen Lily?Copy !req
481. Uh, she just left
with Serena and will.Copy !req
482. In this family feud,Copy !req
483. that's Van Der Woodsen, 1,
Humphrey, 0.Copy !req
484. You guys are home early.
Was that boring?Copy !req
485. Action-packed, actually.
Your father got a call. He's
gotta get back to palm beach.Copy !req
486. One of my patients
has taken a bad turn.Copy !req
487. I've gotta get down there
right away.Copy !req
488. And we're going with him.
You guys get packed.Copy !req
489. I'll arrange for a helicopter
to take us to Teterboro.Copy !req
490. Eric,
mom needs us right now.Copy !req
491. This is our chance
to finally be a family.Copy !req
492. I'll, uh,Copy !req
493. I'll go get my stuff.Copy !req
494. Nate already tried calling.Copy !req
495. There's no reason
to defend your dad.Copy !req
496. We're already packing
for palm beach.Copy !req
497. I'm calling about yours.
Please don't hang up.Copy !req
498. Pl—i-i know how happy you are
to have him back,Copy !req
499. but he's the one who got Holland
to lie about the affair,Copy !req
500. and he had her prescribe pills
for Lily, too.
Dan, my dad is a doctor.Copy !req
501. Why would he need Holland
to give her pills?Copy !req
502. Because the pills
aren't helping her illness,Copy !req
503. Any crazier than
your whole familyCopy !req
504. leaving town with him tonight?
I'm gonna go. Good-bye.Copy !req
505. Serena, wait—Copy !req
506. You all set?
My bags are downstairs.Copy !req
507. Yeah.Copy !req
508. Um, you know, i was thinkingCopy !req
509. maybe we could just wait
and, uh, fly out tomorrow.Copy !req
510. I wish we could. I've got to
get to my patient immediately.Copy !req
511. Are you sure
that's what it's about?Copy !req
512. People are saying you're
behind this Holland thing.Copy !req
513. Holland?Copy !req
514. Um, let me go check on mom.Copy !req
515. Rufus, what are you doing here?
I'd like to talk
to your mother.Copy !req
516. She doesn't want—
Rufus, what is it?Copy !req
517. The truth, finally.Copy !req
518. You want to tell her
or should i?Copy !req
519. So Serena's father sends her
this letter saying thatCopy !req
520. he and Lily were together
when she came to see him...Copy !req
521. Hoping it would cause problems
between Lily and my dad,Copy !req
522. maybe even split 'em up.
When that failed,
he went to plan "b"...Copy !req
523. and she was desperate
for a friend. But once again,Copy !req
524. Rufus and Lily proved too solid,
so on to plan "c."
There's a plan "c"?Copy !req
525. Oh, i always have a plan "c."Copy !req
526. Put yourself
in the good doctor's loafers.Copy !req
527. Lily comes to him over
the Summer. She's actually sick.Copy !req
528. He cures her, falls in love,
decides to win her back,Copy !req
529. only Holland tells him Lily
and Rufus are copper-bottom.Copy !req
530. He thinks, "what can i do
to get her to love me,Copy !req
531. the family to accept me?"Copy !req
532. Save her life. So the pills
he gets from Holland...Copy !req
533. the ones you stole.
Antibiotics, the side effects
of which mimic her symptoms.Copy !req
534. He cures her again,
gets to be the hero,Copy !req
535. and they live
happily ever after.Copy !req
536. No wonder you admire him.Copy !req
537. It's almost like
something you would do.Copy !req
538. Thank you. It does have
the fingerprints of my genius.Copy !req
539. The only question now is...Copy !req
540. Will Lily believe my dad?Copy !req
541. Lily, this is absurd.
You cannot believe his lies.Copy !req
542. Should i call Holland? This time
she'll tell the truth.Copy !req
543. So you get your mistress
to change her story and—
hey. Is my mom really sick?Copy !req
544. Right now
that's all i wanna know.
Of course she was sick.Copy !req
545. Uh, to—to even imagine that
i would prescribe your motherCopy !req
546. medication that she didn't need?
It's preposterous.Copy !req
547. I've got the files in my bag.
Do you want to see them?Copy !req
548. You don't have to
prove yourself.Copy !req
549. Apparently, i do.Copy !req
550. Excuse me.
- William.Copy !req
551. I didn't cheat on you, lil.Copy !req
552. I would never cheat on you.
Rufus.Copy !req
553. So she's not sick?
I just want to be clear.
She's not sick anymore.Copy !req
554. He's been lying since he got
to New York, to all of us.Copy !req
555. And I'm—I'm sorry, mom.
I don't want you to be sick.Copy !req
556. But dad is not lying to us.Copy !req
557. Where's William?Copy !req
558. He-he's in the lobby downstairs
getting his bags.Copy !req
559. There's no one
in the lobby.
- He's down there.Copy !req
560. Serena, the lobby's empty.Copy !req
561. You—you just must not have
seen him. He wouldn't leave.Copy !req
562. Hey. Hey.
He wouldn't leave me.Copy !req
563. Let her go.
Oh, god.Copy !req
564. We should call the police.Copy !req
565. All right, well,
let's just give him a minute.Copy !req
566. No. If we wait,
he'll be gone for good.Copy !req
567. Yes, captain Lewis?
This is Nate Archibald.Copy !req
568. We met at my grandfather's
this Summer.Copy !req
569. Listen, i need a favor.Copy !req
570. What I'd like to know is how did
William know to get out of town?Copy !req
571. Someone must have
tipped him off.Copy !req
572. It had to be one of us.
It was me.Copy !req
573. what happened?Copy !req
574. It's true. He left.Copy !req
575. I need you
to tell me the truth.Copy !req
576. When your mother came to me
last Summer, she was sick.Copy !req
577. I cured her.Copy !req
578. Then i fell in love
with her again.Copy !req
579. When i came here
and saw you and Eric,Copy !req
580. i-i realized how badly
i had messed up.Copy !req
581. I never wanted
to hurt any of you.Copy !req
582. I just wanted
my family back.Copy !req
583. All you needed to do
was be here.Copy !req
584. I'm sorry, Serena.Copy !req
585. I just thought
unless your mother needed me...Copy !req
586. You weren't gonna
give me a chance.Copy !req
587. Well, the police are
on their way now,Copy !req
588. so you should probably go.Copy !req
589. Why don't you come
with me?Copy !req
590. I don't forgive you.Copy !req
591. I also don't need
to punish you.Copy !req
592. So if you just go now, I'll make
sure they don't come after you.Copy !req
593. I love you, Serena.Copy !req
594. I love you, too, dad.Copy !req
595. Go now.Copy !req
596. Rufus, I'm sorry
i didn't believe you.Copy !req
597. I was just so overwhelmed.Copy !req
598. The only thing that matters
is I'm not losing you—Copy !req
599. to cancer, to will
or anything else.Copy !req
600. Really? That's it?Copy !req
601. Dad, she believed you cheated.Copy !req
602. You know, you think that
William's the only problem?Copy !req
603. He's not, dad. You and Lily
fight all the time.Copy !req
604. I mean, one of you thinks
the other's cheating.Copy !req
605. You both keep secrets.
Jenny, that's between
me and Lily.Copy !req
606. You know, i wish it was,Copy !req
607. but we all get dragged into it,
just like we did today.Copy !req
608. When we lived in Brooklyn,
i might have hadCopy !req
609. to take the subway to school
and make my own clothes,Copy !req
610. but at least our family
was happy.Copy !req
611. I don't see what's so wrong
about wanting my lifeCopy !req
612. to go back to normal.
This is where we live.Copy !req
613. What needs to get back
to normal is you.Copy !req
614. If you don't want to be
a part of this family,Copy !req
615. no one is forcing you
to stay.Copy !req
616. You don't have
to wait with me.Copy !req
617. Lily is fine,
and the sting is over.Copy !req
618. You're not really going to keep
up this rugby player facade.Copy !req
619. It's not a facade.Copy !req
620. It's a date,
and he's on his way.Copy !req
621. i know you felt it.Copy !req
622. We were caught up
in a scheme,Copy !req
623. and it was role-play.Copy !req
624. It was real.Copy !req
625. I know you feel it
right now.Copy !req
626. It doesn't change anything.Copy !req
627. And Holland may be crazy,
but she was right.Copy !req
628. No matter what i feel or don't,
we're not safe.Copy !req
629. I did the most dangerous thing
i couldCopy !req
630. when i said "i love you,"Copy !req
631. and it was worth it.Copy !req
632. If i got through my fear
for you,Copy !req
633. you can get through yours
for me.Copy !req
634. You have until tomorrow
to decide.Copy !req
635. What?Copy !req
636. We're never
going to be safe.Copy !req
637. So are you brave enough
or aren't you?Copy !req
638. I'll be waiting at the top
of the empire state building.Copy !req
639. You can't
"affair to remember" me.Copy !req
640. If you're not there tomorrow,Copy !req
641. at 7:01, I'm closing my heart
to you forever.Copy !req
642. Well, i won't be there.Copy !req
643. how'd the sting go?Copy !req
644. Oh.Copy !req
645. I'd much rather hear
about rugby.Copy !req
646. Fair enough.
Rugby is a real sport.Copy !req
647. Football's for...Copy !req
648. Hello?
- Hey. I've been calling you.Copy !req
649. There's nothing more to say.Copy !req
650. I got to my dad
before the cops did.Copy !req
651. So i guess now you knowCopy !req
652. why i don't talk to you
about things.Copy !req
653. thanks for coming with me.Copy !req
654. I know this was
a complicated one for you.Copy !req
655. When are things not complicated
with Serena Van Der Woodsen?Copy !req
656. you want to talk about it?Copy !req
657. When the family tree falls,Copy !req
658. we all need a friend to lead us
out of the woods...Copy !req
659. Or into them.Copy !req
660. I didn't know you'd be here.
I live here.Copy !req
661. I know. I just thought you'd,
um, be with Serena or something.Copy !req
662. Nope.Copy !req
663. But careful—Copy !req
664. once darkness descends,
true natures emerge,Copy !req
665. and everything is fair game
until morning.Copy !req
666. X.O.X.O., gossip girl.Copy !req