Gossip Girl 3x10

1. Gossip girl here—your one and only source

2. You. This couldn't have worked any better.

3. My husband is a congressman. I've had a crush on him.

4. Now i don't know if i can trust myself around him.

5. We got a solid 14 out of 15. I am not going with just one more to go.

6. And who am i?

7. That's a secret I'll never tell.

8. You know you love me.

9. X.O.X.O., gossip girl.

10. As a famed literary liar once told Oprah,

11. memory is subjective.

12. Top of the morning.

13. up top. Yeah, there it is.

14. Memories can be embellished or denied.

15. Hey, Blair. I don't know what you think you saw

16. between me and Tripp, but nothing is happening.

17. But as James frey knows all too well—

18. the truth always comes out.

19. This is my 30th message.

20. I don't want to fight anymore.

21. Please call me.

22. Here comes message 31.

23. Ugh. I don't converse with liars or lewinskys.

24. Come on. Blair. You don't know that you saw anything.

25. In the second grade, i saw our gym teacher

26. giving Laverne glazer's mom the glad eye.

27. Not only did it earn me the first "a++" for gym

28. in constance history,

29. i learned that my sexual tension radar is unparalleled.

30. Point ceded.

31. So is beatnik back?

32. Ew. No.

33. I'm adding new recruits to my student army.

34. Apparently at N.Y.U., no one cares

35. if your forefathers made pumpkin pie at Plymouth.

36. They only care if they made profits at Paramount.

37. Ahh. The Tisch kids.

38. Spawn of moguls and movie stars.

39. Yesterday i sent a first edition "no exit" script

40. to their leader, Paul Hoffman.

41. Today I'll secure the alliance. Care to tag along?

42. Oh, I'd love to, but a high-ranking diplomat

43. has asked me to show his son around New York.

44. I need to build up my continental clientele,

45. so it looks like I'm statue of Liberty-bound.

46. Oh, the sacrifices we make for success.

47. I'll think of a way to make your day less boring later.

48. What, a threesome?

49. Oh, yeah. Just me, Olivia, Vanessa—

50. two girls, four boobs and one Dan Humphrey.

51. How awesome am i? Oh, how stupid can you be?

52. What? - Buddy, okay, i know things. I-I've been to Europe.

53. Chuck bass is my best friend. Yeah.

54. All right, the third person is supposed to be a stranger.

55. there's always a twosome and a onesome going on.

56. You know what? The onesome was not so bad.

57. Okay, you may have enjoyed the show,

58. but let's face it, Vanessa... is very vocal.

59. We talked the next morning. And so is Vanessa.

60. I mean, i haven't really seen her much, but, uh,

61. All right? Not only do i not have a girlfriend,

62. ever since Serena and i stopped speaking,

63. i don't even have a girl friend either.

64. You had both, and you blew it. I did not. I did not.

65. Okay. Okay. In fact, you know what? There she is,

66. my still best friend. - Ah, perfect.

67. Abrams.

68. Hey, Dan. I've barely seen you this week.

69. I feel like you've been avoiding me since...

70. No. No, not at all. Uh, tonight at the bowery—

71. i think morrissey is playing.

72. So you want to go, just the two of us, for old times' sake?

73. Yeah, I'd love it.

74. So I'll see you tonight?

75. Yeah, of course. Yeah. Sorry.

76. Well, it didn't seem awkward at all.

77. Everything is—it's fine. It really is.

78. Give me a call if you need me, which you will. - Mm.

79. Gaga's a Tisch alumni.

80. Even if she doesn't want to give a secret concert

81. at the bleecker, at least show me the courtesy

82. of writing back. Are you guys talking about lady gaga?

83. No, Blair. I'm talking about

84. gaga ahmadinejad, first lady of Iran.

85. That's funny.

86. You know who likes sarcasm?

87. My stepfather, Cyrus rose,

88. big-time entertainment lawyer.

89. Maybe he could talk her into doing a show.

90. Uh, Blair, we all know who my father is,

91. and this girl here is Willa weinstein.

92. If our fathers can't help us,

93. i doubt Cyrus rose, whom I've never heard of, can.

94. What are you guys doing for cabaret tonight?

95. Fairy-tale theme is hard. Don't want to be trite.

96. Cabaret? I love cabaret...

97. And fairy tales.

98. Princesses, queens— uh, sorry, Blair.

99. It's my cabaret, and it's by invitation only.

100. All the spots are filled by... Serious theater students.

101. I don't care how much money they're offering.

102. K.C., "bitches of eastwick" is a terrible idea.

103. It's like "heathers," but with witches.

104. I—ever since "e.K.4" isn't happening,

105. she's literally pushing me to take anything.

106. Yeah, well, i thought— well, I'd hoped

107. that you'd, uh, you'd stick around now.

108. Well, that's my plan.

109. I'm so happy here,

110. you know, with my classes, and i have you.

111. And Vanessa.

112. And Vanessa.

113. And if i want to act, i can do it here at N.Y.U.,

114. you know, with the best theater department in the whole country. Yeah, absolutely.

115. Yeah, you know, speaking of Tisch, um, tell me if I'm crazy,

116. I would have to write a play by this Christmas break.

117. gonna go see morrissey at the bowery.

118. You know, we wear tight shirts, we through gladiolus on stage.

119. Um, it's okay, right?

120. Yes, of course. It's tradition.

121. I'm gonna go grab a coffee, okay?

122. I'll see you later.

123. Okay, uh...

124. I thought we were gonna grab coffee together.

125. What about Brad Alexander?

126. His mother said he's single.

127. Uh, yeah, 'cause he gave six girls from nightingale

128. the gonorrhea of the throat last year.

129. What are you two doing? Oh, we're trying to find Jenny a date

130. for the horticultural society gala.

131. I'm looking to expand my horizons.

132. I'll be just a minute. Charles, how are you? Can i get you a cup of coffee?

133. Thanks, but I'm on my way to the planetarium.

134. I was just dropping off those papers you needed.

135. Thank you. Did Chuck bass just say he was going to the planetarium?

136. Mm-hmm. I'm entertaining a hotel guest,

137. the son of an ambassador.

138. He's waiting in the foyer.

139. Well, maybe Jenny could show him around.

140. You did say you wanted to expand your horizons.

141. Uh...

142. Yeah.

143. I can do it.

144. But you owe me.

145. With pleasure.

146. What is gonorrhea of the throat?

147. Olivia.

148. Just the starlet i was hoping to find.

149. Hi, Blair.

150. Uh, Dorota need to use my outlet for your towel warmer again?

151. Actually, i have a question.

152. How do i win over shallow, superficial actors?

153. Calling them "shallow" and "superficial" didn't work?

154. I'm serious. They're all doing this cabaret thing tonight.

155. I wasn't even invited. Not that i have anything to perform.

156. Well, you're in luck. I-i was invited.

157. I guess being a movie star has a certain cache.

158. I may have read that at the dentist.

159. More importantly, i am dating a guy

160. who needs an opportunity to write a play.

161. He'll just need to clear his schedule first.

162. Hey. Tripp.

163. Uh, how are you?

164. I was, uh, just leaving you a note

165. about the, uh, "observer" article.

166. Oh. Great.

167. I thought you wouldn't be here,

168. which is what it said on your schedule.

169. Right. Um, my meeting ended early.

170. Good. - Yeah.

171. Then you'll have time to read my note.

172. You know, this, um, this really shouldn't be so awkward.

173. It won't be for too long.

174. Big move to D.C. tomorrow.

175. I thought that wasn't until January.

176. Maureen wanted to be there for the holidays—

177. the parties, the networking.

178. It's probably for the best, though.

179. I've been pretty...

180. Distracted.

181. Yeah, tell me about it.

182. Uh, last week...

183. Nothing happened.

184. Then why does it feel like it did?

185. Maybe we should just, uh...

186. Avoid each other until you leave. - Yeah.

187. There you two are.

188. Honey. I just found out they had to move

189. the freshman spouses luncheon.

190. Um, so I'd have to leave in an hour. Is that okay? Yeah, of course.

191. I'll see you tomorrow. I'll just have Jeanne finish packing.

192. But all that's left is the home office.

193. Serena should help you.

194. There's some private family stuff, and i trust you. Um...

195. That's not really in Serena's job description.

196. She doesn't mind. Do you?

197. Now who wants to take their favorite wife to brunch?

198. Don't forget yourself, congressman.

199. Your marriage could wind up in "a million little pieces."

200. Mom, i know how much you love grandfather. And i get it.

201. It's not like i haven't forgiven my father a few times.

202. But do not let him manipulate you.

203. He was the one behind the Hudson thing.

204. Who else could it be? Hello? Nate?

205. I'm sorry. Mom?

206. Yeah, I'd love to hear your new information,

207. but, um, listen, i gotta go.

208. I'll call you later, okay?

209. I know I'm not your favorite person right now,

210. but it's me, Nate,

211. and—and there's no one else i can talk to about this.

212. I, uh...

213. I think i may be about to get involved with a married man.

214. Why am i the only one you can talk to?

215. Because it's Tripp.

216. Vanessa, hey.

217. Hey. I figured you'd be back

218. to get some clean clothes at some point. Yeah.

219. I know, we've barely seen each other.

220. Dan and i have just been... busy, you know?

221. So...

222. You're not...

223. Avoiding me because of the whole...

224. What? Oh, my god.

225. Uh, no. I...

226. Come on.

227. No.

228. Okay, great, because i was totally freaking out

229. before i ran into Dan this morning.

230. But he was the same old Dan.

231. You know, tonight we're going to, like,

232. our fifth morrissey show,

233. and i still have tickets from our first one in seventh grade.

234. - Um, actually...

235. I feel really bad about that.

236. Um, a month ago, i signed Dan and me up

237. for the bleecker inn cabaret, and it's tonight.

238. Um, we would totally blow it off,

239. but Dan wants to apply to Tisch,

240. and it's just really great exposure for him. - Oh, yeah.

241. Okay.

242. Sorry about morrissey.

243. I just don't get it. I mean, Tripp? Really?

244. Two months ago, you were all over Carter Baizen.

245. Tripp has sacrificed so much to get where he is.

246. I mean, we all have. He can't just throw it away for you.

247. Yeah, and he's fighting it, and so am i.

248. I can literally feel my heart thump when i see him.

249. I haven't felt this way since i was 13,

250. with Jude law in "Alfie."

251. Yeah, well, you're not 13 anymore, Serena.

252. You know, i thought that, uh, whatever happened between us

253. i could still count on you,

254. but i guess i was wrong.

255. Hey.

256. You're right. I'm sorry.

257. You can count on me, always.

258. So, Belgium, huh?

259. I bet they have really good waffles.

260. on the Oslo accord. He worked on the Oslo accord? That sounds major.

261. Yeah, clearly more major than being a father, but...

262. - Right.

263. So, uh, what do you want to do? There's the boathouse for lunch,

264. or we could walk on over to Jean georges.

265. You know, i have a plan.

266. It'll be fun.

267. Oh, my god. Don't—don't look now,

268. but those are—those are the chapin mean girls.

269. Hi.

270. They're gonna die of jealousy.

271. Uh...

272. Toy sail—sailboats?

273. Really?

274. Come on. It might be cool in Belgium,

275. but in Manhattan, only little kids do that.

276. You have eight hours to write and rehearse

277. your reimagined fairy tale before tech.

278. Lots of Tisch faculty and alums will be there,

279. plus my legit agent.

280. So, please, don't embarrass me.

281. Good luck.

282. See? - Yeah, you're—yeah, you're right. You're right.

283. This is gonna be a great opportunity.

284. All right, so which fairy tale do you think i should—

285. totally "snow white." Sorry I'm late.

286. Uh, uh, what?

287. What is she doing here?

288. Silly. I'm the producer,

289. costar and director.

290. Yeah, it was— it was her idea, actually.

291. My brilliant idea.

292. A musical featuring the songs of Tisch alumna lady gaga.

293. Paul loves his gaga.

294. I'm gonna go pick his brain

295. about what songs he'd think work best thematically.

296. Okay. Um...

297. What's— what's going on here?

298. You want me to cancel on Vanessa,

299. who's gonna be justifiably furious,

300. to—to write a "snow white"/ lady gaga musical

301. to be directed by Blair Waldorf? Listen, i know that her idea

302. is—is kind of out of the box, but if you pull this off,

303. everyone's gonna be talking about it.

304. And i talked to Vanessa. She's totally cool about tonight.

305. Wait. S-so you already told her?

306. I-i ran into her in—in our room,

307. and she was fine. I promise.

308. Chuck, could you find another way to drum up business?

309. Because this Belgian bore has been playing in the park

310. for the past half-hour with his dinghy. I have a reputation.

311. All right. All set. What now? Balloon animals?

312. By the way, you took the wrong boat.

313. Uh, no. Actually, this is, uh, the one with the cash.

314. Mine had the "e" in it. - What?

315. Sorry if i was boring you. You still want to get some lunch

316. and we can go find those, uh, chapin girls?

317. Okay, man, so—so get this. I had plans with Vanessa tonight,

318. right? But then Olivia signed me up

319. wherein one, if not both girls,

320. try to prove to the other who you belong to.

321. All right, so what do i do? Oh, you gotta prove to Olivia

322. that you and Vanessa are still just friends,

323. despite the fact that you've seen each other's business.

324. You good? - Yeah, thanks, man.

325. All right, later.

326. Oh. Dan. Girl problems.

327. You don't even want to know.

328. It sounds like you're everyone's therapist today.

329. Yeah, well, affairs with married people, love triangles—

330. just so happens everyone's problems are

331. well within my area of expertise.

332. Okay, you ready?

333. Serena, hey.

334. Uh, what do you like on your pizza?

335. Actually, I'm—I'm not coming over.

336. I had a feeling you'd call.

337. I can't say I'm not disappointed, though.

338. Come on, Tripp.

339. You know it's not a good idea for us to be alone all night.

340. No, you're right.

341. I don't want to go without saying good-bye.

342. Could we maybe just get some lunch?

343. Lunch? Yeah. I—you know, I...

344. Um... I actually don't think

345. that i can. But travel safe, congressman.

346. Bye.

347. Good work. I'm gonna be here to keep you strong.

348. Until Tripp leaves, I'm not gonna let you out of my sight.

349. Mr. Van Der bilt, Mrs. Archibald is here to see you.

350. My aunt?

351. I'm kind of busy. Can she come back later?

352. No, she said it was important.

353. but i told Olivia this morning that i wanted to apply to Tisch,

354. and so she saw this cabaret thing, and she signed us up.

355. Wait. This morning?

356. Yeah. You know, it had nothing to do with our plans tonight.

357. I mean, this is— it's a big opportunity for me. Of course.

358. Yeah, so, um, i-I'm gonna need your help.

359. Inspired by miss gaga's lyrics,

360. I've written a satirical commentary

361. about fame, glamour

362. and our society's obsession with the shiny new thing.

363. Humphrey, I'm surprised. This isn't horrible.

364. You play the aging queen, a fading but talented rock star

365. who's earned her success.

366. Olivia—snow white, a young up-and-comer who's trying

367. to steal the queen's thunder by being outrageous and sexy. I like it.

368. Yeah. Uh, Amalia, Sophie, twins—

369. you're the struggling dwarf boy band.

370. I'll be prince of charming records,

371. trying to find his next big pop star. So i, you know,

372. We still have your subpar acting to deal with.

373. Let's meet back here in a half an hour.

374. more suited to the project. Julie taymor?

375. (Dan) Close.

376. No. - Vanessa?

377. V., i am so stupid for not thinking of you earlier.

378. We're so lucky to have you

379. to bring Dan's amazing words to life.

380. Wait until you read this. I already did. Dan always shows me early drafts of his work.

381. Well—well, i mean, i, you know,

382. i had to get her on board, show her somethin'.

383. Great. Well, if you need any pointers,

384. I've worked with some of the world's best directors. Sure.

385. If i want to turn anyone into a bat, I'll—I'll let you know.

386. Thank you.

387. Dan? - Yeah?

388. When girls live together,

389. sometimes their cycles sync up.

390. No hormones— not yours or theirs—

391. will get in the way of my cabaret.

392. It'll be fine, Blair.

393. What exactly does an Upper East Side queen do?

394. You wear designer clothes

395. and boss people around?

396. No.

397. I go to parties and openings and stuff.

398. Where you wear designer clothes and boss people around?

399. Sounds like kind of a yawn.

400. Well, yeah,

401. i guess compared to being an international drug dealer.

402. What's the deal with that anyway?

403. they don't search our bags when we come in from the hague.

404. Besides of the added satisfaction of knowing

405. my father would have to suffer if i were ever caught.

406. A little bit of danger is what makes life worth living,

407. and you had your very first taste today, queen Jenny.

408. It was kind of thrilling. If you mean that, some friends are gonna meet me

409. a little later to refuel my boat.

410. You in?

411. High school was so much easier.

412. Yeah, but i was.

413. Well, not— not men, obviously.

414. that was my first experience being someone's fake girlfriend. Ohh.

415. you were a great fake girlfriend.

416. Oh, my god. You got... It's, like, all over your—

417. no. No. It's, like, you got—no.

418. Okay.

419. It's like... Just—here. Stop.

420. You're good. - Thank you.

421. Yeah.

422. Oh. It's, uh, it's Tripp.

423. Oh, you can't. But what if it's important?

424. Serena, just give me the phone.

425. Now you can't talk about him or think about him or see him. What—what are you gonna do,

426. Okay, like, really, really drunk.

427. - Deal?

428. Deal. You're the best.

429. Oh, snow, have this apple Martini

430. before your v.M.A. Performance tonight.

431. I promise it's not poisoned.

432. You know, i think the dwarves should be in the front.

433. Okay. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Excuse me.

434. Um, no one's gonna be able to see me.

435. Yeah, well, this moment really is about the dwarves,

436. right, Dan? - Yeah, well, i mean,

437. it's called "snow white," so technically it's...

438. Of course you would take her side. What?

439. Well, he's right. I'm not standing in the back. It was just a suggestion.

440. Boxing me out is one of Vanessa's favorite activities.

441. What did you say? Whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay. All right.

442. to box me out. - Are you kidding me?

443. You're the one who boxed me out today,

444. with your morrissey plans. And that night.

445. (Dan) What? - What are you talking about?

446. Vanessa, you're in love with Dan,

447. and everybody here knows it. It is true.

448. Olivia, that—that's crazy.

449. Come on.

450. Okay, i don't need to put up with any of this.

451. I quit. - Oh, no, you don't. I quit.

452. What is going on?

453. Did you bozos have a threesome or something?

454. Oh, god.

455. How stupid can you be?

456. The third person is always supposed to be a stranger. Blair, look, this is my mess.

457. I can—I'm—I'm gonna go talk to the girls. In which order? Hmm?

458. Exactly.

459. You're gonna have to tech all by yourself.

460. I have an army to build, a school to take over

461. and girls to blackmail.

462. Uh-oh, playwright. Better whip out your pen.

463. It looks like this cabaret just became a one-man show.

464. Olivia, I'm not asking you to do cabaret for me.

465. I'm asking you to do it for all the tweens of this world.

466. My fans don't care if i do cabaret. - But they'll care

467. if they hear their favorite queen of the dead had a...

468. Ménage with disgusting Dan Humphrey

469. and his celebutante girlfriend.

470. Do you really want everyone here to know

471. that alterna-chick Abrams is literally a star—

472. first I'll text t.M.Z...

473. Then gossip girl...

474. Oh, and the town crier in nowheresville, Vermont,

475. so your parents find out.

476. So...

477. What's it gonna be?

478. Oh.

479. Do you realize we haven't been out drinking alone

480. since, uh...

481. Since the Shepherd wedding.

482. Yeah, the night that everything changed.

483. Yeah.

484. Maybe we should get some food and sober up

485. before something happens.

486. Come on, Nate. It's been three and a half years.

487. I can control myself if you can.

488. Another round, please. - You got it.

489. Saved by the bell.

490. Hold on one second. I'll be, uh, I'll be right back.

491. Hey. - Nate.

492. I just found out...

493. Grandfather wasn't behind "Hudson hero."

494. It was Maureen.

495. Your mom just told me.

496. No. You're kidding me.

497. I'm so sorry, Nate.

498. I let you take the fall.

499. What are you— don't worry about me, Tripp.

500. It's you. What are you gonna do?

501. I don't know.

502. I can never trust her again.

503. I don't know if i even want to see her again. Of course, you're angry.

504. Okay, Tripp, but she's your wife. All right?

505. Any kind of separation this early in the term

506. could affect your reelection.

507. Reelection is the last thing on my mind right now.

508. I just need to clear my head.

509. But you're out.

510. No, I'm just at the Brandy library with a friend.

511. Listen, hang in there, and I'll call you later, okay?

512. Was that Dan again?

513. Yeah, the guy's got the most complicated love life.

514. How about that round? Now there's the Nate i remember.

515. oh, by the way, Eugene, uh, Jenny. Jenny, Eugene.

516. Hi, nice to meet you. Cool. See you, boss.

517. Good.

518. My guy is here.

519. Here here? Like he's coming over to the table?

520. Where would you suggest we do it?

521. In the alley, with the cops and the cameras?

522. Oh.

523. I understand if you want to leave

524. or, you know, go to a-another table.

525. No. I'm good.

526. Granny...

527. W-why are your teeth so...

528. Big?

529. What—what if they don't show up?

530. They will.

531. Oh, that's the "show must go on" spirit.

532. We're up next. I'm gonna go make sure the dwarves are ready.

533. And i have a little treat for Paul i need to set up.

534. Hey. I'm—I'm glad you decided to come tonight.

535. Well, Blair didn't really give me much choice.

536. Look, uh, Vanessa and i are just friends.

537. Yeah, she—she has no feelings for me. I'm positive.

538. In fact, i made the same mistake when you went to Japan.

539. So, you know, whatever you... Think you saw

540. during our—our thing,

541. uh, it wasn't from her.

542. Yeah, no. You're right.

543. Right. See?

544. I told you.

545. It wasn't from her.

546. It was from you.

547. I sat up to take my shirt off.

548. I look over,

549. and... you were looking at Vanessa

550. like you've never looked at me.

551. And then you kissed her, like...

552. Like you've never kissed me.

553. No. That's—that's...

554. That little thing? That was hardly even a kiss.

555. That you even know what I'm talking about

556. proves that it happened.

557. If you just let yourself,

558. you'll see that your feelings for her are real...

559. And you should stop kidding yourself.

560. Hey, prince charming. Looks like it's time

561. for you to look in the enchanted mirror.

562. Platinum record on the wall,

563. who's the most talented of us all?

564. Though your voice is as clear as day,

565. your dance moves are quite passé.

566. And snow white's youth and sex appeal

567. means she'll get the record deal.

568. my, what talent you small people have.

569. If only there were a vampy young ViXen to front you,

570. we'd all be swimming in online sales.

571. Luckily... I happen to be dating one.

572. so you guys met at boarding school? That's cool.

573. What?

574. right.

575. Yeah, eighth grade, le rosey.

576. ♪ got no direction ♪ good times.

577. Yeah.

578. Um,

579. it was nice to meet you. I'm gonna use the ladies room.

580. No, no, no. Hey, sit down. Don't go empty-handed.

581. Here. Just, uh, test the product, yeah?

582. That won't be necessary.

583. ch-Chuck, what are you doing here?

584. - After i got your message, i had housekeeping

585. do an early turndown service on Damien's room.

586. That's where they found his stash.

587. I've had my own experience in the boat pond.

588. I'm taking you home. You and your father have

589. Dude, the lady said she's fine.

590. Dude...

591. I'm Chuck bass.

592. Even Europeans must know what that means.

593. Well, now that I've added a disco-electro pop beat

594. to snow white's love ballad

595. and put your voices through auto-tune,

596. it's time to take over the land.

597. ♪ i wanna take a ride on your disco stick ♪ uhh!

598. That's her cue. Where the hell is she?

599. I have no idea.

600. well—well, y-you know what? The disco stick tends to be

601. an unreliable form of transportation.

602. It, uh, it breaks down a lot.

603. What—what are you doing? - Get in.

604. Yes.

605. Oh... Prince, here i am—snow white.

606. Oh. - And i—and i got plastic surgery

607. and colored my hair, like you suggested.

608. Oh, right. Right. Well, you look fantastic.

609. you know, it took me a long time

610. to get over what happened with us that night.

611. I actually, uh...

612. Well...

613. Two years ago at the masquerade ball,

614. i tried to tell you i loved you.

615. It turns out i told Jenny Humphrey.

616. She was wearing your mask.

617. you—you loved me?

618. Of course i did.

619. Serena, you're the most beautiful,

620. amazing, alive person I've ever known.

621. Nate.

622. I hope I'm not interrupting something.

623. Platinum record on the wall,

624. it's me now who have it all.

625. Just as long as true love's kiss

626. doesn't wake this coked-up miss.

627. Oh, if only the prince would kiss her...

628. We could be international backup dancers on her world tour.

629. There he is now!

630. Yes.

631. You have to kiss her.

632. Kiss her!

633. What are you doing?

634. Uh...

635. Snow white is alive!

636. So snow white lives.

637. But are Dan and Olivia dead?

638. Blair, it was amazing.

639. You surprised us all.

640. Speaking of which, i have a surprise for all of you.

641. And, uh, Dan, if you ever think of applying

642. to the playwriting program, let me know if you want me

643. Yeah, I'm gonna take you up on that offer.

644. Everyone, follow me.

645. So Maureen, uh...

646. Wow. I, um, i can't believe she did that.

647. I called her. She admitted it.

648. You okay?

649. Not really.

650. My wife isn't who i thought she was,

651. and neither's my marriage.

652. Nate, thanks for hearing me out earlier.

653. You're a great friend.

654. Yeah, well...

655. Any time.

656. Wait. Nate, you knew? Why didn't you say anything to me?

657. I...

658. Look, Serena,

659. i don't know anything anymore.

660. I just know i don't want to be alone.

661. Could we take a walk?

662. Yeah.

663. Hey, wait.

664. Serena, i didn't tell you about Maureen

665. because Tripp's a married man.

666. If you go with him now, you're gonna cross the line.

667. Thank you for everything, Nate, really,

668. but that line just got a little blurry.

669. but lady gaga certainly has. Back when she was

670. still at Tisch, they used to play cards together.

671. Who do you think "poker face" is about?

672. That's why she's letting us see her dress rehearsal.

673. hey, Olivia. Wh-where have you been?

674. You kind of abandoned me out there.

675. I know. Sorry.

676. I knew Vanessa would step in,

677. and i needed you to kiss her.

678. Yeah, which i did, because i had to for the play.

679. I mean, you—you made me do it. You can't be mad.

680. You can't judge what happened if you didn't see it. I didn't need to.

681. You were the one that needed to kiss her again,

682. to realize for yourself that your feelings for her are real.

683. anyway, uh, i just got off the phone with k.C.,

684. and she kinda convinced me to take that witch movie.

685. What? Olivia, you can't— you can't leave like this.

686. I read the script.

687. It's actually pretty good.

688. I'll be back in the fall.

689. there you are. Look...

690. We're gonna have to talk about it.

691. We saw each other naked, and there's no going back.

692. But we're friends.

693. So, Olivia, i apologize for how i acted during rehearsal.

694. But i don't like Dan like that,

695. and i haven't in years.

696. Right?

697. Yeah. Yeah, she's right.

698. Hey, Vanessa. And, you know, i think Paul Hoffman kinda likes me.

699. look, i get the whole

700. "sullen teenager pushing an envelope" thing.

701. I've pushed a pack.

702. But you're better than that Damien guy.

703. Look, i may be queen,

704. but I'm more lonely and bored

705. than i was when i lived in Brooklyn.

706. And being with him is exciting. - And dangerous.

707. - Please. It takes one to know one.

708. I saw that look in your eye the very first day

709. you came on my radar. And what so-called look would that be?

710. Be very careful, Jennifer Humphrey.

711. If you go down the rabbit hole, it's going to take more

712. than Blair Waldorf and your army of minions

713. to drag you back out.

714. So what, you're gonna walk me to my room

715. and make sure i don't get into any trouble?

716. Just try not to run into any euro dealers in the kitchen.

717. are you okay?

718. sometimes it's after the curtains close

719. that the real reckonings come.

720. whether it's about who we wish we were...

721. or who we wish we could be...

722. or who we want.