1. Gossip girl here—
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2. your one and only source
into the scandalous lives
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3. of Manhattan's elite.
You confided in Dan
and even Blair.
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4. Everyone but me.
- So that's it?
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5. We can't even be friends?
Well, we were never really
friends, remember?
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6. Hope you don't mind, but we've,
uh, we've got a lodger.
Make yourself at home.
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7. Have you seen my sketchbook?
Whoa, sorry! Oh, my god.
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8. Yale is your dream,
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9. and you deserve to go here
more than i do.
You can't share this.
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10. We'll find a way.
I'm gonna give you
a second chance.
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11. If you can tell me the fate
of Cecil the caterpillar,
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12. i will go out with you.
I just realized that
i-i do know Aaron.
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13. We went to Summer camp together.
We got married.
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14. I can model them.
Max will do some photos.
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15. so why do you care so much?
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16. And who am i?
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17. That's a secret
I'll never tell.
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18. You know you love me.
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19. X.O.X.O., gossip girl.
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20. Spotted at minh—Jenny Humphrey
buying 16 yards of tulle.
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21. But since when
does Eleanor Waldorf
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22. pay for her purchases
with a penny jar?
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23. They say a stitch in time
saves nine.
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24. Will it save little j.?
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25. We are going
to blow them away.
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26. We better,
otherwise i am so dead.
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27. went to go see a movie.
Yeah, that's Nate
avoiding me once again.
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28. He's still acting like
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29. he didn't stick his tongue
down your throat?
- Yeah. Ew.
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30. Well, amnesia doesn't really
happen till after sex with guys,
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31. so what's his problem?
I don't know.
He used to date Vanessa?
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32. I'm Dan's little sister?
Too young? I wouldn't know.
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33. We don't talk.
So what? After tonight
you'll be so famous,
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34. Okay, fine, then you
have to make the move.
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35. That's the only way
it's gonna work.
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36. Oh, my god. Is that the time?
I told you.
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37. Okay, yeah.
You need to sew way faster,
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38. 'cause we are so screwed.
'Cause ready or not,
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39. with their closed doors and this
private thing for Eleanor.
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40. Jenny—she didn't say
anything to you?
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41. Like how much privacy
does she really need
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42. to watch "project runway"
and eat pizza?
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43. Oh, oh. Hold on a second.
Ooh, it's Jordan.
- Who?
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44. The, uh, you know,
the t.A. From Yale.
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45. She was trying to get me
a recommendation?
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46. You—you hooked up with her.
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47. Oh, yeah, that's right.
Jordan.
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48. Oh, it's good to be Nate.
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49. "I had three professors
read your stories.
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50. I'll call you later."
Hey, that sounds
like good news.
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51. Good? No. It means she had
the first one read it.
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52. He didn't like it.
Neither did the second,
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53. and after the third,
she probably just gave up.
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54. And why text before calling
if you don't need
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55. to soften the blow?
Or she was somewhere
she couldn't talk,
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56. so she sent a text.
With an imagination like that,
you should be a writer.
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57. Hey, where are you going?
I-i can't concentrate
on a movie right now.
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58. I-i-i gotta—i gotta go home
and stare at my phone.
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59. Maybe you could talk to Jenny,
figure out what's going on.
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60. Yeah, sounds like
a great idea.
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61. My father went to Yale,
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62. and I've wanted to go there
ever since i was a little girl.
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63. How nice.
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64. So, Serena, tell me about
Karl lagerfeld's birthday party.
Oh, it—it was fun,
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65. but did you know
Blair's mother is a designer?
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66. You know, when Dean berube
suggested i meet with you,
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67. i had no idea you would be
such a delight.
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68. (Man) Yes, thank you. Bye.
Oh, excuse me.
My husband's on his way out.
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69. Malchus, this is
Serena Van Der Woodsen.
Good afternoon.
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70. Uh, hi, and my best friend
Blair Waldorf.
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71. Pleased to meet you.
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72. What am i doing here?
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73. Liz and her husband
are both prominent Yale donors
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74. and good friends with the Dean.
Well, just like their
good friend the Dean,
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75. they only have eyes for you.
Come on, b., you can do this.
Yale is your dream.
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76. I'm afraid I'm going
to have to run.
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77. My husband's off
to his business dinner,
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78. and before i meet my friends
from Bryn mawr,
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79. Oh, Emma doesn't mind. As long
as she has her Harry Potter book
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80. and a bowl of ice cream,
she's happy as a clam.
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81. Uh, no, Blair will
take her to a movie.
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82. I-i would take her myself,
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83. but I've got something
with my family, so...
Why, Emma would love that.
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84. You sure you don't mind?
Emma, dear?
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85. Come here.
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86. Anything for the friends
of Dean berube.
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87. Yes, mother?
Serena's friend...
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88. Blair.
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89. Yes, would like
to take you to a movie.
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90. Oh, thank you.
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91. This is gonna be fun.
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92. Yeah.
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93. Hello.
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94. Hey. Um, what are you
doing here?
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95. Uh, i just had a meeting
with the collector.
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96. So did you figure out...
Cecil the caterpillar.
Camp suisse.
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97. We got married
and exchanged licorice rings.
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98. And you ate your five minutes
after the ceremony.
- Yeah.
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99. When did you finally remember?
Um, about the time you were
speeding away with a girl
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100. on the back
of your motorcycle.
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101. Audra.
Yeah, she's just a friend.
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102. No, i recognized you the moment
you walked in the gallery.
No, you didn't, but it's okay.
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103. Some faces you don't forget.
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104. Um... You know,
i have this charity gala.
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105. It's actually here,
and i wouldn't normally go,
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106. but my mom's being honored
and my brother's out of town,
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107. and I'm rambling,
but i was wondering...
I'm late! I know.
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108. I was thinking
maybe we could, uh...
Mm. I'm sorry.
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109. Hey, uh, maybe
in another nine years.
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110. What was that about?
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111. Jenny, come on.
The Van is almost here.
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112. Eleanor's going to kill
herself after tonight.
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113. I know. I just have
a few more things to do.
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114. Dan?
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115. What are you doing here?
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116. I spy with my little eye
someone getting busted.
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117. Is my mom gone?
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118. Yes.
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119. So what kind of movies
do you like?
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120. Something where
the animals sing or...
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121. Oh, sweet heaven.
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122. So muffy mcdonough's
been bragging
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123. about how she's gonna
lose her virginity
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124. 'cause she finally landed a date
with the lacrosse captain.
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125. They call him
"the de-virginator."
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126. Oh, my god.
Stop your mouth from moving.
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127. But now that i finally have
the night away from mom and dad,
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128. we'll see who's first.
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129. about your little
clearance sale, Lohan.
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130. Please. I heard you talking
about getting into Yale.
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131. Well, Dean berube
is, like, my uncle,
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132. so help me or i tell him
how you took me to a club
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133. and got me wasted.
Rumor has it that lady b.'S
been outfoxed by a young fox.
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134. Got a credit card, fake i.D.,
and i want bacardi and a boy.
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135. This body's
open for business.
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136. It seems only one ivory tower
is being stormed tonight.
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137. You quit Eleanor's?
- I had to.
She was using me.
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138. Does dad know about it?
No, of course dad doesn't know.
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139. What am i saying?
You haven't been shipped off
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140. to a convent yet.
Hey, Dan,
just take it easy.
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141. I just—i really need tonight.
I've worked so hard.
- For—for what? What is this?
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142. Stop! We're putting on
a guerilla fashion show.
I don't know what that means.
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143. Okay.
These dresses—i made them.
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144. And—and Agnes and her friends
are gonna model.
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145. Please, Dan.
Tonight's the one chance
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146. i have to show everyone
what i can do.
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147. Ivan, i swear if that Van's
not here in ten minutes,
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148. you're not getting
those photos of me.
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149. Are we busted now or what?
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150. Dan, please.
I just need a few hours.
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151. Then I'll tell dad
everything.
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152. All right.
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153. I, uh,
i-i just need to think.
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154. Well, you finally did it—
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155. made absolutely sure
I'm never gonna get into Yale.
What are you talking about?
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156. Little Emma—turns out
she's less Holly hobbie
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157. and more Jenna Jameson.
Can you speak plainly?
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158. She's determined
to become a woman on my watch,
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159. and if i don't help
pimp her out, she's gonna
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160. Next time leave the scheming
to the experts. What are those?
Pictures from camp suisse.
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161. Aaron dressed up
as Cecil the caterpillar.
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162. I bumped into him
outside the palace.
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163. The guy gave you a ring pop
when you were 6. Move on.
It was licorice, and i was 8.
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164. Ancient, unimportant history.
Focus, Serena.
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165. You got me into this,
and I'm not losing Yale
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166. Take her to the charity gala.
When you get there,
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167. you can say you didn't know
how lame it would be.
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168. Then it's time for her to
go home. You're off the hook.
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169. So i checked out
"gossip girl,"
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170. and I'm thinking we hit
socialista before Beatrice.
See what I'm dealing with?
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171. Emma, i was thinking,
where is the glory
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172. in bedding down with
some dirty Manhattan hipster
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173. who's probably filming you
on the nanny cam?
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174. You really want
to make muffy jealous?
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175. Have your flower plucked
by one of the elite.
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176. And where would i find
someone like that?
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177. Luckily, we know the place.
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178. But you're gonna have to pay
a visit to my closet first.
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179. Ooh.
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180. Sorry. Thing about a café—
people weirdly want service.
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181. Come on, v., what—
what am i gonna do?
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182. and whatever this whole
fashion show thing is,
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183. Don't lump me with Nate.
He's your friend.
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184. Are—are we ever gonna
talk about this?
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185. He was living there with
no electricity, no furniture—
you did the right thing.
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186. Which is why you haven't been
to the loft since he moved in.
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187. Just tell me. Do you still
have feelings for him?
Nate hates me.
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188. That's not what i asked.
Nate and i tried.
It didn't work. End of story.
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189. I'm just saying,
if you like him,
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190. you should tell him,
'cause Nate is a good guy.
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191. It's funny how you're ready
to condemn your sister,
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192. but Nate, who's done some
pretty questionable things,
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193. I-i don't want her
to get in trouble.
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194. What if she's about to make
a huge, life-altering mistake,
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195. and i don't stop her?
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196. Who's about to make
a huge mistake?
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197. Well,
what do we have here?
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198. Allow me
to introduce myself.
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199. I'm Chuck.
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200. Bass. Oh, my god. I read
about you on "gossip girl."
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201. You're—
you're like the devil.
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202. Finally some truth
in advertising.
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203. Headed out, are we?
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204. Serena, Blair and i
are going to the gala.
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205. Hope you're coming?
Well, I'm all for company
on a Saturday night,
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206. but the only thing i like
that aged is my scotch.
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207. What? It's old people?
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208. Well, how about you take me
for a ride instead?
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209. Buckman, could you pass this
to miss Serena?
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210. It was with the concierge.
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211. Looks like you've just
hooked yourself a bass.
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212. You look beautiful.
Can we go now?
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213. Patience, love.
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214. The sooner we get there,
the sooner the jig is up.
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215. I'll go check
on the vestal virgin.
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216. Left at the concierge, miss.
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217. Thank you.
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218. Well-played, Cecil.
- She's gone!
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219. Who?
- Who do you think? Emma!
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220. Jenny,
you should wait for Dan.
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221. No, there's no time.
This is my one chance i have
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222. to prove that
i can be a designer.
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223. Otherwise it's back to being
little j. At constance,
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224. except worse this time, because
everyone's gonna know i failed.
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225. And since when
are you so worried?
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226. You haven't spoken
two words to me all week.
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227. Careful, guys!
Those are couture!
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228. Hey, why do you keep
eating those pot brownies?
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229. Do you care about me?
Prove it.
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230. Come with me.
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231. Maybe i should drive.
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232. Okay, guys, come on!
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233. This train wagon
is on the move!
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234. Is that Nate?
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235. Hey! Hey, stop!
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236. Stop!
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237. Wow. A real limo.
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238. This is so perfect.
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239. Uh,
by the way, my name is—
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240. let's not ruin it
with talking.
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241. Fine.
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242. Spotted—
bass taking the bait...
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243. Straight to business then.
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244. Jailbait, that is.
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245. Text him.
I've texted him six times.
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246. Well, text him again
before he screws that girl
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247. with Emma's
Facebook picture on it.
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248. Every girl in Manhattan
will be on the lookout. Chuck!
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249. You! What did you
do with her?
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250. Hey! She assaulted me,
demanded i deflower her.
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251. Oh, limos and virgins,
your specialty.
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252. Just so you know,
while there are few things
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253. i consider sacred, the back
of the limo is one of them.
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254. When she realized she couldn't
ride this thoroughbred,
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255. she bolted.
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256. Last time i saw her, she was
heading in a cab downtown.
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257. Hey, is just texted me—
she said the bartender at 1oak
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258. I can't go.
I have my mom's thing.
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259. What? No! You're coming.
You owe me, both of you!
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260. Come on!
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261. Jenny, what are we doing
here at the palace?
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262. This is the New York
philanthropic society's
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263. annual gala.
- I know.
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264. I'm no fashion expert,
but shouldn't the people
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265. Everyone is gonna
be here tonight—
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266. fortune 500 c.E.O.S,
lvmh, ppr, hearst.
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267. We're looking for people
with money who can get us press.
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268. Well, looks like you've
done your homework, but—
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269. i have. Sometimes the ends
have to justify the means.
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270. Here. I pulled you a suit
on the way out.
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271. It would really mean a lot
to me if you stayed.
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272. i don't see her.
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273. I'll talk
to the bartender.
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274. You have to admit,
the licorice ring was sweet.
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275. Look, even if you're
just being literal,
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276. i don't want to hear another
word about your albatross
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277. until we find mine.
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278. there she is.
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279. oh, my god.
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280. look.
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281. looks like you got nailed,
just not in the way you wanted.
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282. Give me time.
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283. Okay, you guys,
let's go. Come on.
Serena!
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284. Hey, you should have called.
Scott, hey.
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285. Don't worry.
I have a table for you.
Wait! Wait! No!
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286. Get out of my—stop her!
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287. Emma!
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288. Excu—ew!
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289. Oh, my god.
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290. Excuse me, miss.
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291. Can i have your name,
please?
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292. Uh, yeah, it's Erica.
Erica Van Der Woodsen.
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293. Sometimes they leave
off the "a."
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294. My—my parents are
the, uh, the guests of honor.
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295. Oh. Okay, thanks.
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296. Yeah.
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297. What am i doing?
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298. Jenny?
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299. Hi, Mrs. bass.
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300. Um...
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301. Congratulations.
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302. I didn't, uh, i didn't know
you were receiving an award.
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303. It's really...
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304. Uh, really...
It's really great.
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305. Well, thank you.
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306. Um, honestly, i hate being
the center of attention,
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307. but, um...
So, um, who are you here with?
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308. Oh, well, uh...
She's with me.
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309. Oh!
- Yeah, my mom
couldn't make it, and, um,
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310. she asked me to fill in,
so i invited Jenny.
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311. Oh, that is so sweet.
Have you seen Serena?
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312. No, i haven't, actually.
I'm sorry.
- Okay.
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313. Excuse us.
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314. My god, you're shaking.
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315. Yeah, i didn't—i didn't
know that Lily and Bart
Copy !req
316. were getting an award,
and I'm about to ruin the night
Copy !req
317. of—of people who've only
ever been nice to me, Nate.
Then just forget about it.
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318. You don't have
to go through with it.
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319. There are other ways.
No. Have you not heard
anything I've said, Nate?
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320. This is it. Tonight's all i
have. Nate, i don't even know...
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321. You kissed me again.
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322. I know.
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323. So does that mean
you don't regret last week?
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324. I guess not.
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325. Jenny, whatever you decide,
I'm with you.
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326. Okay.
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327. move!
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328. I lost her out front in
the crowd of identical couples.
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329. Their cab is probably
halfway to serge's by now,
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330. if she even waits that long.
She's not answering her phone.
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331. Well, congratulations, s.,
for ruining my future again.
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332. Me?
- I'm sorry.
Who came up with the idea
Copy !req
333. of me babysitting my way
into Yale?
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334. You wouldn't have had
another chance with the Dean
Copy !req
335. if it hadn't been for me.
Oh, right,
you're such a celebrity.
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336. "Miss Van Der Woodsen,
your pillows are being fluffed
Copy !req
337. in the v.I.P. Section."
Kittens, please.
I found her table.
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338. You're behind the plot, bass.
She already left.
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339. The bartender says
she's in the corner booth.
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340. E. Boardman? Elizabeth.
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341. That's not Emma.
That's her mother,
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342. and that's
not her father.
- Oh, my god.
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343. It seems the saying's true—
Copy !req
344. like mother, like daughter.
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345. Or is it the other way around?
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346. Oh, she's cool.
Don't worry.
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347. This is Stewart.
He's in love with me.
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348. Uh, isn't he gonna
get fired for this?
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349. Yeah, well,
he was gonna quit anyway
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350. to be a professional gamer.
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351. Oh, i have to check
on the models.
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352. Stewart, take this.
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353. Do not do anything gross
to my friend.
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354. If you'd just
come to me sooner—
Copy !req
355. never mind we don't know
where she is.
Copy !req
356. she's still not picking up.
Did you try Nate?
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357. What?
- Spotted at the palace—
Nate Archibald and little j.
Copy !req
358. What is it?
- Um, "gossip girl."
They're at the palace.
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359. Let me see.
There's nothing to see.
Let's just go.
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360. Let's get out of here now.
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361. We hear lonely boy's b.F.F.
Still carries a torch for Nate.
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362. If she finds out
about little sister,
Copy !req
363. wonder who'll get burnt.
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364. Come—come on. You're a cab.
Do that weaving thing.
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365. Dad, dad, dad. It's okay.
We're gonna find her, all right?
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366. I gotta think Nate
would've said something.
Don't be so sure.
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367. Nate didn't know. He would
never keep that from us.
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368. We don't know
what Nate would do, Vanessa.
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369. His morals are questionable
at best.
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370. Who—who would've thought
that he'd date both you
Copy !req
371. and a certain lady?
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372. And by "lady," i mean older,
and by "date," i mean—
Copy !req
373. what's he talking about?
Nothing.
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374. What is up with you?
What happened to,
Copy !req
375. "if you like him, tell him.
Nate's a good guy"?
Copy !req
376. Sounds like
you still like him.
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377. Is that Jenny?
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378. Ooh.
Copy !req
379. No, it's—no, it's Jordan,
Copy !req
380. the t.A. From Yale
who will have to wait.
Copy !req
381. Come on.
You gotta be kidding me!
Copy !req
382. You're letting
the mister softee truck pass us?
Copy !req
383. Come on. Here.
Copy !req
384. Dad, that's a $1.
Copy !req
385. Whoa. Are you sure
Jenny's here?
Copy !req
386. Yeah.
- What is this?
Copy !req
387. A private party, sir.
If you're not on the list,
Copy !req
388. I'm afraid i can't let you in.
I'm just here to find
my daughter, so—
Copy !req
389. Rufus?
What are you doing here?
Copy !req
390. I-it's fine.
- Okay.
Copy !req
391. I'm—I'm gonna go look for Nate.
He's taller and easier to spot.
Copy !req
392. I'm gonna look for Jenny.
Copy !req
393. Thanks. Uh...
Copy !req
394. But—well—is Jenny okay?
I saw her earlier.
Copy !req
395. What—what's going on?
I was about to ask that myself.
Copy !req
396. Rufus.
- Bart, hello.
Copy !req
397. I need to find my daughter,
Copy !req
398. so if you see her,
hold onto her, would you?
Copy !req
399. Huh.
Copy !req
400. Congratulations.
Copy !req
401. What? I didn't invite him.
Copy !req
402. Let's go get a drink.
Copy !req
403. Thank you, god, so much.
I won't let you down.
Copy !req
404. Chuck's seeing if the doorman
knows Emma's guy.
Copy !req
405. Why? Who cares about him?
Copy !req
406. Blair, no.
Copy !req
407. This poor little girl's
mother is having an affair.
Copy !req
408. No wonder she's acting out.
So? This is my golden ticket.
Copy !req
409. You are not blackmailing
that woman to get into Yale.
Copy !req
410. Serena, open your eyes!
This is a sign from god.
Copy !req
411. He wants me to do this.
This family needs help.
Copy !req
412. Well, no argument there. They're
even more screwed up than yours.
Copy !req
413. So humbert humbert's name
is serge grodanz.
Copy !req
414. His father plays tennis
at the club.
Copy !req
415. I know where his building is.
Let's go.
Copy !req
416. I'm going over there.
Copy !req
417. You know,
I'm—I'm late for the gala.
Copy !req
418. My mom's texting me. Look,
do whatever you want, Blair,
Copy !req
419. but please save Emma first.
Copy !req
420. Fine. We'll save
Copy !req
421. little red riding hood
from the big bad wolf.
Copy !req
422. But after that, it's bulldog,
bulldog, rah, rah, rah!
Copy !req
423. I'm trusting you.
Copy !req
424. You have any bright ideas?
Copy !req
425. As a matter of fact, one.
Copy !req
426. Dan. Hey.
Copy !req
427. Whoa. What are you doing?
What am i doing?
What are you doing?
Copy !req
428. Or is this not you
with my 15-year-old sister?
Copy !req
429. Okay, whoa, whoa, whoa,
just calm down.
Copy !req
430. Okay, things just happen.
I'm sorry.
Copy !req
431. Come on. She's a sophomore.
I'm a senior.
Copy !req
432. Don't act like
I'm some creepy older guy.
Copy !req
433. No, you're the guy
who traded sex for money.
Copy !req
434. Oh, my god.
Vanessa.
Copy !req
435. It's amazing i don't want you
with my little sister.
Copy !req
436. Okay, look, I'm sorry i didn't
say anything about Jenny, okay?
Copy !req
437. But you have no right
to judge me.
Copy !req
438. Where is she?
Copy !req
439. Look, i don't even know.
She went off to find Agnes.
Copy !req
440. Do you want me to come
help you find her?
No, i don't want your help.
Copy !req
441. I want you to pack up your stuff
and get out of our house.
Copy !req
442. Emma, open up.
Copy !req
443. Emma?
I know you're in there!
Copy !req
444. Go away!
Serge is in the bathroom,
Copy !req
445. and when he gets out,
Copy !req
446. I'm not letting
muffy lose hers before me.
Copy !req
447. She beats me in everything.
Tell her
to check "gossip girl."
Copy !req
448. Emma? Do you have your phone?
Check "gossip girl."
Copy !req
449. It's important.
Copy !req
450. Look, i already told you,
nothing's gonna—what?
Copy !req
451. It says, "muffy's muff
gets stuffed." Does that mean—
Copy !req
452. that little muffy took her first
steps as a woman? Afraid so.
Copy !req
453. She lost her virginity
and her "gossip girl" cherry
Copy !req
454. in the same night? But how did
she get on "gossip girl"?
Copy !req
455. It pays to have connections.
Copy !req
456. Emma?
Come here, my little Princess.
Copy !req
457. - What? Who are you?
Copy !req
458. Now i feel violated.
Come on.
Copy !req
459. Piece of advice—
lose the tulip.
Copy !req
460. Hey, it's Aaron.
Leave a message.
Copy !req
461. Oh, if this is Serena,
that girl at the hotel today—
Copy !req
462. not what you think.
I mean, not my girlfriend,
Copy !req
463. if that's what you thought,
Copy !req
464. 'cause i don't have
a girlfriend, and I'm rambling.
Copy !req
465. So, uh, if this isn't Serena,
leave a message. Thank you.
Copy !req
466. Um, okay, that was the worst
message i have ever heard...
Copy !req
467. Or the best.
Copy !req
468. Um, i was just calling
to thank you for the ring,
Copy !req
469. but somehow
i am finding myself
Copy !req
470. wanting to give you
another chance.
Copy !req
471. Hello?
Copy !req
472. Hello?
Copy !req
473. Are you calling for Aaron?
Copy !req
474. Yeah. Hi. Who's this?
Copy !req
475. Tamara.
Aaron's in the bathroom.
Copy !req
476. Do you wanna wait, or—
Copy !req
477. no! Uh, no, no. Just—
just tell him, um...
Copy !req
478. No, just—don't—
don't tell him anything.
Copy !req
479. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
480. Cecil, you got me again.
Copy !req
481. Nate, where are you going?
Copy !req
482. Jenny, I'm sorry.
I gotta go home.
Copy !req
483. Your brother's here,
and he knows.
- Wait. What?
Copy !req
484. Yeah, he saw us kissing
on "gossip girl."
Copy !req
485. He's here with your dad.
My—no, my dad's here?
Copy !req
486. Jenny, come on. The models
are ready, and we gotta go.
Copy !req
487. No, no, no. My dad
and my brother are here.
Good.
Copy !req
488. So they can see how amazing
you are with their own eyes
Copy !req
489. instead of reading it
in the papers tomorrow.
Copy !req
490. I mean, it's not like he's
going to kill you twice.
- Okay.
Copy !req
491. Wait. Please.
Nate, please, don't go.
Copy !req
492. I really need you here.
Please.
Copy !req
493. Good evening. May i have
your attention, please?
Copy !req
494. Thank you.
Copy !req
495. As head of the New York
philanthropic society,
Copy !req
496. presenting this award
is my favorite duty.
Copy !req
497. Please join me in congratulating
Lily and Bart bass.
Copy !req
498. Did you find her?
- No.
Copy !req
499. Lily and Bart bass have funded
the construction of clinics
Copy !req
500. and hospitals
in Equatorial Guinea,
Copy !req
501. Sri Lanka—
Copy !req
502. My apologies.
There seems to be
Copy !req
503. some sort
of technical difficulty.
Copy !req
504. (Sonic youth's "sheena is
a punk rocker" playing)
Oh, god.
Copy !req
505. it looks great.
Copy !req
506. Thank you!
Copy !req
507. Oh, my god. Vanessa!
Copy !req
508. Vanessa, wait!
Copy !req
509. Here, here, here, Jenny, Jenny.
Stop. No, just—
Copy !req
510. it's not your place, okay?
No,
i have to say something.
Copy !req
511. No, no.
- Stop. I shouldn't
have done that. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
512. Jenny.
- Vanessa!
Copy !req
513. Looks like it's bros before hos
for little j.
Copy !req
514. Who knew that
when her loyalty kicked in,
Copy !req
515. Nate would be kicked out?
Copy !req
516. J Humphrey designs!
Backers are welcome—whoa.
Copy !req
517. Get your groping hands
off of me, creep.
Copy !req
518. I cannot believe your sister.
Copy !req
519. She's taken it
to a whole other level.
Copy !req
520. Yeah, yeah, she has.
Copy !req
521. She's gotta be around here
somewhere.
Copy !req
522. I'll check the lobby.
Copy !req
523. You might be upset,
but the truth is,
Copy !req
524. this wasn't how you wanted
to lose your virginity.
Copy !req
525. And which venue
would you suggest, perhaps?
Copy !req
526. Chuck, i know it wasn't easy
Copy !req
527. getting "gossip girl"
to post that bogus report.
Copy !req
528. Thank you.
Copy !req
529. For you, anytime.
Copy !req
530. I think your little virgin's
making a break for it.
- Ugh!
Copy !req
531. Emma. Emma! Wait.
Copy !req
532. Aren't you done?
You won—
Copy !req
533. you, muffy, my mom.
I'm the only loser.
Copy !req
534. You still don't get it.
Copy !req
535. Having sex for the first time
shouldn't be
Copy !req
536. part of a competition to beat
muffy the lacross-titute.
Copy !req
537. It should be with someone
you love.
Copy !req
538. Was your first time
with someone you love?
Copy !req
539. Yes. It was.
Copy !req
540. And honestly...
Copy !req
541. There are better ways of
getting your mother's attention.
Copy !req
542. I told you,
this is about muffy.
- Please.
Copy !req
543. I wrote the book on distracted,
self-centered mothers.
Copy !req
544. My mom has never met
a single one of my teachers.
Copy !req
545. She regularly forgets
my birthday,
Copy !req
546. and she only comments
on my appearance
Copy !req
547. when she has something
to criticize.
Copy !req
548. But you're perfect.
Copy !req
549. True, and that's why
i finally realized
Copy !req
550. it wasn't about me...
Copy !req
551. The same way
it's not about you.
Copy !req
552. My mom always says
when we come to the city,
Copy !req
553. we're gonna hang out and do
mother-daughter things.
Copy !req
554. It never happens.
Copy !req
555. So tell her that.
Copy !req
556. And... can you try to avoid
the serges of the world?
Copy !req
557. Thanks, by the way.
Copy !req
558. That guy was pretty gross.
Copy !req
559. Yeah.
Copy !req
560. Uh... hello?
Copy !req
561. Hey, Jordan. Uh, no, no.
No, no, it's not too late.
Copy !req
562. Uh, yeah. I-i saw that.
The three professors. That's...
Copy !req
563. No, i-i know what anemic means.
Copy !req
564. Uh, all right, well, thank you.
Thank you for trying.
Copy !req
565. I appreciate it. Okay.
Copy !req
566. Hey.
Copy !req
567. Is everything okay?
Copy !req
568. Um... no.
No, not really.
Copy !req
569. No, don't—
don't worry about Jenny.
Copy !req
570. She'll probably
get in some trouble
Copy !req
571. for disrupting the event,
but honestly,
Copy !req
572. Jenny will be great,
because Jenny always does
Copy !req
573. what she has to do to get
what she wants.
Copy !req
574. I don't follow.
Copy !req
575. Tonight my sister alienated
everyone in her life.
Copy !req
576. But tomorrow she's gonna be
in "the New York times."
Copy !req
577. I just can't help but wonder
Copy !req
578. if she's the one with
all the guts in the family.
Copy !req
579. Hey,
where is this coming from?
Copy !req
580. Nowhere. Nowhere.
I'm sorry.
Copy !req
581. The Humphreys already
spoiled your mom's night.
Copy !req
582. I don't wanna spoil yours,
too.
Copy !req
583. No, i don't care about
this night. I care about you.
Copy !req
584. Tell me what's wrong.
Copy !req
585. Uh... I'm not gonna get
into Yale
Copy !req
586. or probably any other school
with a decent writing program.
Copy !req
587. No, Dan, that is not true.
No. I gotta go find my dad.
Copy !req
588. Thank you.
Copy !req
589. Good night.
Copy !req
590. Do you realize
what time it is?
Copy !req
591. And look at that dress.
Copy !req
592. You expect me to believe
you went to the movies in that?
Copy !req
593. Mom, please don't.
This isn't her fault.
Bed now.
Copy !req
594. Bed!
Copy !req
595. Mrs. boardman, before you say
anything you'll regret—
Copy !req
596. what was your plan—
take my daughter clubbing
Copy !req
597. and hope she'd plead
your case to the Dean?
Copy !req
598. I have some bad news
for you, miss Waldorf.
Copy !req
599. From what I've seen,
you're not Yale material.
Copy !req
600. Oh, you haven't
seen anything yet.
Copy !req
601. Tell me,
did you have a nice time
Copy !req
602. with your Bryn mawr friends?
What is that supposed to mean?
Copy !req
603. Here.
Let me lend you my phone.
Copy !req
604. You'll be needing it
to make a call to new haven.
Mom, this isn't Blair's fault.
Copy !req
605. I told you to go to bed.
Blair was only
trying to help me.
Copy !req
606. You're lecturing me?
Copy !req
607. No wonder i don't want to spend
time with you. Bed! Right now!
Copy !req
608. You were saying?
Copy !req
609. Just...
Copy !req
610. Your daughter
is a great girl.
Copy !req
611. You should pay
more attention to her.
Copy !req
612. Soon it'll be too late.
Copy !req
613. Excuse me, ma'am?
Copy !req
614. Um, did you see
a girl come out?
Copy !req
615. She had a blue shirt
and dark, curly hair?
Copy !req
616. Jenny.
- Dad? Dad, let go of me.
Copy !req
617. Let go of me, dad.
I'm trying to find Vanessa.
I hope you're proud of yourself.
Copy !req
618. You know what? I am.
Copy !req
619. Because honestly, i achieved
everything that i wanted.
Copy !req
620. Jenny, you can't
just go through life
Copy !req
621. And those people aren't calling
to tell me how mad they are
Copy !req
622. that i ruined their party.
They're calling to tell me
Copy !req
623. and speaking for him, i have
never been more disappointed.
Copy !req
624. Hi. Hi there. I hope I'm not
interrupting anything.
Copy !req
625. Jenny, i think you owe
Lily an apology.
No, really.
Copy !req
626. No, no, no. He's right.
Lily, I'm—I'm really sorry.
Copy !req
627. Well, honestly, it wasn't
the evening i expected,
Copy !req
628. but it was amazing.
Copy !req
629. The whole thing
was inspired.
Copy !req
630. Um...
Copy !req
631. Okay, I'm just gonna wait
over here for a moment.
Copy !req
632. If you think you're getting
away with this tonight,
Copy !req
633. you are dead wrong.
It's too late. It's done.
Copy !req
634. Yeah, you're right.
Copy !req
635. Officer, if you're looking
for the person responsible
Copy !req
636. for tonight, this is her.
- Dad!
Copy !req
637. Rufus.
You can't be serious.
Copy !req
638. You're giving me no choice.
Copy !req
639. It's her number
all over the polaroids.
Copy !req
640. Miss, I'm gonna have
to take you to the station.
Copy !req
641. We'll call your parents
from there.
Copy !req
642. He is my parent—
the one getting me arrested!
Copy !req
643. Officer, my name is Lily bass,
and i was the one
Copy !req
644. being honored this evening,
and my husband
Copy !req
645. also owns this hotel, and we
won't be pressing any charges.
Copy !req
646. Makes my job easier.
Copy !req
647. Lily, this is none
of your business.
Copy !req
648. I am saving you from
making a terrible mistake.
Copy !req
649. You know what?
Copy !req
650. You guys figure it out.
Copy !req
651. I'm going home.
Copy !req
652. Poor Jenny—all that glamour
almost led to the slammer.
Copy !req
653. But what will
the morning bring?
Copy !req
654. Figured you'd be back
at the family manor.
Copy !req
655. Is this the new minimalism?
Copy !req
656. What the hell is going on?
Copy !req
657. What do you think?
I told you we were in trouble.
Copy !req
658. You didn't tell me
it was this bad.
Copy !req
659. Then again, if it drove you
to Brooklyn,
Copy !req
660. i guess i should have known.
Brooklyn's over. I'm going
to stay with my mom.
Copy !req
661. Don't be so dramatic.
You're coming with me.
Copy !req
662. No. I'm not.
Copy !req
663. B., it's time to get up.
Copy !req
664. There are other schools
besides Yale—like Princeton.
Copy !req
665. Princeton is a trade school.
There's only Yale.
Copy !req
666. Well, I'm proud of you
for not succumbing
Copy !req
667. to your baser instincts.
Copy !req
668. Hey, even though you
might not get into Yale,
Copy !req
669. at least this way
you won't go to hell.
Copy !req
670. Blair Waldorf's phone.
Copy !req
671. Y-yes, Dean berube.
She—she's right here.
Copy !req
672. What? No!
- Yes.
Copy !req
673. Dean berube. What a surprise.
Copy !req
674. Miss Van Der Woodsen?
You have a visitor.
Copy !req
675. Yes.
Copy !req
676. Uh-huh.
Copy !req
677. Hey.
Copy !req
678. So, uh, i was thinking you, me,
assorted breakfast pastries.
Copy !req
679. How many pastries exactly?
Copy !req
680. Look, Aaron,
the rings were sweet,
Copy !req
681. but i thought about it,
Copy !req
682. and i don't really want to date
someone who has a posse.
Copy !req
683. A posse?
- Well, in our last
two encounters,
Copy !req
684. you've been with
two different girls.
Well, one—one was a friend.
Copy !req
685. So you've said.
Copy !req
686. And the other one was...
Copy !req
687. You know what?
Copy !req
688. No, i-i could explain
who Tamara is
Copy !req
689. and why she was
at my apartment last night.
Copy !req
690. The fact is, either you feel
something here or you don't.
Copy !req
691. If you want an excuse not to
give this a shot, that's fine.
Copy !req
692. But ever since you walked
into the gallery last week,
Copy !req
693. i haven't been able to stop
thinking about you.
Copy !req
694. I even dug up
my old camp stuff.
- So did i.
Copy !req
695. Is it too weird to think
that maybe fate brought us
Copy !req
696. back together again?
Copy !req
697. Yes...
Copy !req
698. But romantic, too.
Copy !req
699. Hey, you know what?
Forget breakfast.
Copy !req
700. I've waited nine years.
I think that merits dinner.
Copy !req
701. You didn't eat that ring,
did you?
- No, not yet.
Copy !req
702. Good. It's nine years old.
Copy !req
703. Wait. You kept yours?
Copy !req
704. I'll see you tonight.
Copy !req
705. Ah!
Copy !req
706. Oh, my god. Emma told the Dean
that I'm the one person
Copy !req
707. living or dead that she'd
most like to have dinner with.
Copy !req
708. Oh, b.!
- And he said that Yale
Copy !req
709. Hey, i was just
about to wake you.
Copy !req
710. Mm.
Copy !req
711. Your, uh, sister
stomped out of here
Copy !req
712. at about 6:00 this morning,
so it's just the 2 of us.
Copy !req
713. finishing this story
for Noah shapiro.
Copy !req
714. The guy from "the Paris review"?
Which story?
- The one about Chuck bass.
Copy !req
715. You said you couldn't
write that story.
Copy !req
716. No, i could always write it.
I chose not to.
Copy !req
717. Dan, just because Jenny—
dad, look, the morning after
my little sister stages
Copy !req
718. a fashion show
that all of New York City
Copy !req
719. will be talking about
is not the time
Copy !req
720. for the "slow and steady"
speech.
Copy !req
721. All right, I'm sorry.
I-i tried it your way.
Copy !req
722. I wish i could get
the two of you to understand
Copy !req
723. that success, people
praising you, it goes away.
Copy !req
724. And when that day comes,
Copy !req
725. if you don't like
who you are, you're done.
Copy !req
726. Well, i guess that's a chance
I'm willing to take.
Copy !req
727. Dan, please.
I have to worry about you now?
Copy !req
728. It's gonna be all i can do
to try and reach Jenny.
Copy !req
729. It's a little late
for that, dad.
Copy !req
730. I-i think you need
to look in her room.
Copy !req
731. s. And b. Are headed for Yale.
Copy !req
732. Nate's headed out of town,
and Dan's headed for trouble.
Copy !req
733. As for little sister Jenny,
Copy !req
734. she's nowhere to be seen.
Copy !req
735. x.O.X.O., gossip girl.
Copy !req