Good Luck Charlie 3x18

Directed by Bob Koherr

Julia Cho as Mindy • Dillon Lane as Walker • Davenia McFadden as Verna • Luke Baird as Toby Duncan • Cyrina Fiallo as Vonnie

Amy uses her maiden name to work as a nurse at Gabes' school so he won't be embarrassed. Teddy and Vonnie team-up for a school project. PJ and Emmett start a baby-sitting service.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. UH-OH!

2. DAD'S HERE. DONUTS!

3. RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

4. UP TOP.

5. IT'S NOT FUNNY ANYMORE.

6. DAD'S LOST A BUNCH OF WEIGHT.

7. THANKS A LOT, DAD. YOU GOT SKINNY

8. AND KILLED ALL MY BEST MATERIAL.

9. ACTUALLY, I'VE LOST SO MUCH WEIGHT,

10. I GOTTA START BUYING MY CLOTHES IN A REGULAR STORE NOW.

11. NO MORE "BENNY'S HUGE AND BALD"?

12. "LENNY'S BIG AND TALL."

13. BUT I LOVE LENNY'S.

14. IT'S THE ONLY STORE WITH STEEL-REINFORCED DRESSING ROOMS.

15. THE ONLY STORE WHERE THE FREIGHT ENTRANCE

16. IS ALSO THE MAIN ENTRANCE.

17. ( laughing ) OKAY, WAIT WAIT. OKAY, I GOT ONE.

18. IT'S THE ONLY STORE WHERE THE LARGE SIZES ARE BIG

19. AND THE SMALL ONES...

20. AREN'T.

21. YEAH, I GUESS I DON'T GOT ONE.

22. ALL RIGHT. I'M OFF TO THE MALL.

23. WOW. SHOPPING WITHOUT SHAME.

24. THIS IS GONNA BE DIFFERENT.

25. HEY, DAD.

26. JUST DON'T GET A HAIRPIECE.

27. I MEAN, YOU GOTTA LEAVE ME SOMETHING.

28. WHERE THE BIG PEOPLE ARE SO FAT—

29. - P.J., WE'RE DONE. - OKAY.

30. GREAT NEWS!

31. REMEMBER THAT PLAY I WROTE?

32. - "THE DANCING PRINCESS"? - YEAH.

33. MY THEATER GROUP IS DOING THE PRODUCTION

34. AND IVY'S DIRECTING.

35. AND I'M STARRING?

36. - NO. - OH.

37. THEN WHAT'S THE GREAT NEWS?

38. WELL, YOU'RE NOT IN THIS ONE, MOM,

39. BUT GUESS WHO IS.

40. CHARLIE!

41. I'M GONNA BE A PRINCESS.

42. GOOD FOR YOU.

43. HOPE SHOW BUSINESS DOESN'T BREAK YOUR HEART

44. AS IT DID MINE.

45. HEY, CHARLIE. WHY IS THAT BEAR STILL ON THE FLOOR?

46. I ASKED YOU TO PICK THAT UP AN HOUR AGO.

47. HEY, PRINCESS. I'M NOT GONNA ASK YOU AGAIN.

48. PICK UP THE BEAR NOW.

49. NO.

50. SHE'S BEEN LIKE THIS ALL DAY.

51. MOM. IF I MAY...

52. CHARLIE, SWEETIE.

53. COULD YOU PICK UP THAT BEAR

54. FOR YOUR BIG SISTER, PLEASE?

55. OKAY.

56. IF YOU NEED HER TO DO ANYTHING ELSE,

57. JUST LET ME KNOW.

58. SHE'S THREE YEARS OLD. YOU GOT LUCKY.

59. NO NO. IT'S NOT LUCK.

60. CHARLIE AND I HAVE A SPECIAL SISTER BOND.

61. I GUESS YOU COULD CALL ME

62. "THE CHARLIE WHISPERER."

63. ( weak chuckle ) "THE CHARLIE WHISPERER."

64. OKAY. WELL, IF YOU'RE SO GOOD,

65. WHY DON'T YOU GET HER TO COME OUT OF YOUR ROOM?

66. I DID THAT ONE WITH MY MIND.

67. WHAT YOU WORKING ON?

68. OH, IT'S FOR ENGLISH.

69. I HAVE TO WRITE A REPORT ABOUT AN OLD PERSON.

70. "MY NEIGHBOR BERT: BY GABE DUNCAN."

71. "BERT DOOGAN: HUSBAND, FATHER...

72. ASTRONAUT"?

73. WHOA!

74. I DIDN'T KNOW GRUMPY OLD BERT WAS AN ASTRONAUT.

75. NEITHER DOES GRUMPY OLD BERT.

76. I MADE THE WHOLE THING UP.

77. IT WAS EITHER THAT OR ACTUALLY TALKING TO THE OLD DUDE.

78. "WHENEVER I MOW BERT'S LAWN,

79. HE TELLS ME STORIES ABOUT HIS ADVENTURES IN SPACE.

80. THERE WAS THIS ONE TIME WHERE HIS ROCKET

81. SPRUNG A LEAK AND HE FIXED IT

82. WITH TOOTHPASTE AND MOON ROCKS."

83. ( chuckling ) COME ON, DUDE!

84. NO ONE'S GONNA BELIEVE THAT.

85. WHAT, THE MOON ROCKS?

86. NO, THAT YOU MOWED SOMEBODY'S LAWN.

87. OH!

88. OH, THERE'S MY FAVORITE PLAYWRIGHT.

89. THERE'S MY FAVORITE DIRECTOR!

90. - AH! - HEY!

91. THIS IS SO EXCITING.

92. I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW YOU WANTED TO DIRECT.

93. ARE YOU KIDDING?

94. I TALK LOUD, I LIKE TO BOSS PEOPLE AROUND—

95. I'M A NATURAL.

96. YES!

97. OKAY.

98. WELL, UH,

99. AT LEAST WE KNOW WHO'S GONNA PLAY THE YOUNG PRINCESS—

100. - CHARLIE. - WHOA.

101. LET'S NOT GET AHEAD OF OURSELVES.

102. CHARLIE'S GOT TO AUDITION LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE.

103. OKAY, I GET IT.

104. YOU WANT ME TO BRING CHARLIE IN FOR AN "AUDITION."

105. YES, I "DO."

106. IVY, LOOK. IT'S JUST ONE LINE

107. AND I WROTE IT FOR CHARLIE.

108. AND IF SHE CAN SAY IT, SHE GETS THE PART.

109. HELLO.

110. MRS. DUNCAN, PLEASE STOP CALLING ME.

111. YOU CANNOT BE IN THE PLAY.

112. HEY, GUYS.

113. WHAT WAS THAT?

114. UH... BOB, HONEY?

115. COULD YOU COME OUT HERE PLEASE?

116. WHATCHA WEARIN'?

117. WHAT, THIS?

118. GOT IT AT THE MALL.

119. YEAH, SOME REGULAR STORE. WHATEVER.

120. OH, THE PLACE WAS CALLED

121. "CLOZ", WITH A "Z."

122. CLOZ?

123. I SHOP THERE.

124. AT LEAST I USED TO.

125. ( clears throat ) QUESTION

126. ABOUT THIS "CLOZ" WITH A "Z"--

127. UM, DO THEY HAVE MIRRORS OR LIGHTS?

128. ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT, FINE.

129. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING.

130. HEY, AT FIRST, I WASN'T SURE

131. ABOUT THIS NEW LOOK EITHER.

132. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?

133. EVERYBODY KEPT COMPLIMENTING ME.

134. REALLY?

135. YEAH, THEY SAID I WAS "MAKING IT WORK,"

136. "ROCKIN' THAT OUTFIT."

137. OH, YEAH— "KILLIN' THOSE JEANS."

138. NOT SURE THAT LAST ONE WAS A COMPLIMENT.

139. "AND THOSE ARE THE KIND OF UPLIFTING STORIES

140. MY NEIGHBOR BERT TELLS ME WHENEVER MY BROTHER P.J...

141. MOWS HIS LAWN."

142. GABE, THAT WAS WONDERFUL. THANK YOU.

143. NO, THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME THE ASSIGNMENT.

144. YOU KNOW, BERT SOUNDS LIKE AN INCREDIBLE MAN.

145. DO YOU THINK HE COULD COME IN AND SPEAK TO THE CLASS?

146. UM... YOU KNOW,

147. ( stammering ) I DON'T THINK THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.

148. HE'S NOT MOVING AROUND VERY WELL ANYMORE.

149. ASTRONAUTING IS VERY HARD ON THE KNEES.

150. WELL, IF YOU BRING HIM IN, I'LL GIVE YOU EXTRA CREDIT

151. AND IT COULD BRING YOUR GRADE UP TO AN "A."

152. HUH. AN "A" IN ENGLISH.

153. WHOO! CAN'T ASK FOR MORE BETTER THAN THAT.

154. NEXT!

155. OKAY. FOR THE ROLE OF THE YOUNG PRINCESS,

156. - PRESENTING CHARLIE DUNCAN. - HI, CHARLIE.

157. OKAY, CHARLIE, SAY THE LINE.

158. CHARLIE, HEY.

159. CHARLIE, REMEMBER, YOUR LINE IS

160. "YOUR MAJESTY, I WAS BORN TO DANCE."

161. OKAY? NOW YOU SAY IT.

162. I TURNED MY EARS OFF.

163. - HERE, JUST— CAN YOU GIVE US A MINUTE? - OKAY.

164. WHO'S NEXT?

165. HI, I'M TAMMY.

166. HI, TAMMY. WHENEVER YOU'RE READY.

167. YOUR MAJESTY,

168. I WAS BORN TO DANCE.

169. TAMMY, THAT WAS VERY GOOD.

170. WOW. WHAT DID YOU THINK?

171. A LITTLE SHOW-OFFY FOR MY TASTE.

172. OH, COME ON! SHE'S FANTASTIC.

173. YEAH, I DON'T KNOW. I MEAN, YEAH SURE,

174. SHE CAN ACT AND DANCE AND SAY THE LINE,

175. BUT ONCE YOU TAKE THAT AWAY, THEN WHAT DO YOU HAVE?

176. CHARLIE.

177. OKAY.

178. WE HAVE GOT TWO GREAT CANDIDATES

179. FOR THE ROLE OF THE YOUNG PRINCESS.

180. LET'S JUST COMPARE THEM OBJECTIVELY.

181. CHARLIE VERSUS...

182. HAMMY.

183. TAMMY.

184. OH, IT'S TOO LATE.

185. I ALREADY WROTE "HAMMY."

186. OKAY!

187. CUTENESS.

188. WELL, CHARLIE GETS A 10.

189. ( chuckles ) NO— NO QUESTION THERE.

190. AND, UH, TAMMY—

191. LET'S BE GENEROUS AND GIVE HER A FIVE.

192. A FIVE?

193. IS THAT TOO HIGH? I'LL MAKE IT A FOUR.

194. PERSONALITY.

195. TAMMY HAS A NICE SMILE.

196. WITH DEAD SHARK EYES.

197. I'LL MAKE IT ANOTHER FOUR.

198. CHARLIE GETS A 10.

199. HOW ABOUT THE ABILITY TO SAY LINES?

200. OH. YEAH. THERE IS SOME, UH—

201. THERE IS SOME DEBATE THERE.

202. YOU KNOW WHAT?

203. LET'S JUST GIVE THEM EACH A FIVE.

204. AND THERE YOU HAVE IT! CHARLIE IS THE CLEAR-CUT WINNER!

205. OH, TEDDY! COME ON!

206. BUT THE NUMBERS DON'T LIE. I DIDN'T JUST MAKE THEM UP.

207. YES, YOU DID!

208. IVY, I WILL GET HER TO SAY THE LINE.

209. I'M THE CHARLIE WHISPERER.

210. ALL RIGHT. SHE'S GOT THE PART.

211. I DON'T KNOW HOW I'M GONNA EXPLAIN THIS TO TAMMY.

212. DON'T WORRY ABOUT TAMMY.

213. SHE'S GONNA GET TONS OF PARTS.

214. SHE'S AMAZING.

215. OOH, COOKIES.

216. HEY, THEY'RE NOT FOR YOU.

217. THEY'RE FOR BERT.

218. BERT'S COMING OVER?

219. YEAH, AND CAN YOU STICK AROUND?

220. YOU HAVE A WAY WITH OLD PEOPLE.

221. USUALLY, IT CREEPS ME OUT, BUT NOW I NEED YOU.

222. HEY! BERT! COME ON IN.

223. I'VE BEEN LIVING ACROSS THE STREET

224. FROM YOU PEOPLE FOR 20 YEARS

225. AND I'VE NEVER BEEN INVITED OVER.

226. WE'RE SHY.

227. SHY? I HEAR THAT MOTHER OF YOURS

228. SINGING AND DANCING ALL THE TIME!

229. WOMEN, HUH, BERT?

230. HEY, TELL ME ABOUT IT.

231. COOKIE?

232. YEAH, SURE.

233. THAT IS A NICE CARDIGAN.

234. THEY DON'T MAKE THEM LIKE THAT ANYMORE.

235. YOU GOT THAT RIGHT. ( chuckles )

236. NOW YOU, I LIKE.

237. ANYHOO, BERT.

238. I WAS WONDERING IF YOU COULD COME TO MY CLASS

239. AND TALK ABOUT YOUR AMAZING CAREER.

240. AMAZING?

241. I WAS A MAILMAN.

242. GOOD STUFF. GOOD STUFF.

243. BUT LET ME JUST SUGGEST ONE SMALL—

244. A LITTLE TINY TWEAK.

245. INSTEAD OF MAILMAN,

246. LET'S USE A DIFFERENT WORD.

247. LETTER CARRIER?

248. I WAS THINKING ASTRONAUT.

249. YOU WANT ME TO LIE?

250. WHAT'S WRONG WITH BEING A MAILMAN?

251. NOTHING.

252. IT'S JUST THAT THE KIDS THESE DAYS,

253. THEY'RE NOT AS EASILY ENTERTAINED,

254. WHAT WITH THE VIDEOGAMES,

255. THE GIZMOS AND THE GADGETS.

256. WE'RE LOSING OUR COUNTRY, BERT.

257. THAT'S WHAT I ALWAYS SAY WHEN I'M TALKING TO MY RADIO.

258. SO— SO YOU'LL DO IT?

259. NO! I'M NOT GONNA LIE ABOUT MY JOB.

260. WHAT WILL YOU LIE ABOUT?

261. YOUR VACATIONS? AND COULD ONE OF THEM

262. POSSIBLY HAVE BEEN TO JUPITER?

263. ARE YOU OFF YOUR NUT?

264. - WHO RAISED YOU ANYWAY? - ( door opens )

265. HEY, BERT.

266. OKAY, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.

267. CHARLIE, IT'S JUST ONE LINE.

268. SAY IT WITH ME.

269. "YOUR MAJESTY,

270. I WAS BORN TO DANCE."

271. CHARLIE, COME ON, PLEASE.

272. HEY, GIRLS. WHAT'S GOIN' ON?

273. I CAN'T GET CHARLIE TO SAY HER LINE.

274. WHY DON'T YOU JUST DO IT WITH YOUR MIND?

275. IF YOU'RE DONE MOCKING ME, I COULD REALLY USE YOUR HELP HERE.

276. OH, SWEETHEART.

277. I'LL NEVER BE DONE MOCKING YOU.

278. OKAY, RELAX. I HAVE AN IDEA.

279. OKAY, CHARLIE.

280. WE'RE GONNA READ A FUN NEW BOOK.

281. IT'S CALLED

282. "YOUR MAJESTY, I WAS BORN TO DANCE."

283. OHH!

284. THAT SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT TITLE.

285. YOU WANNA SAY THAT?

286. YEAH, DO YOU WANNA SAY IT LIKE THE PRINCESS IN THE BOOK?

287. THAT'S A DOG.

288. WELL, IT'S A DOGGY PRINCESS

289. WITH AN INVISIBLE TIARA.

290. I WANT ANOTHER BOOK.

291. COME ON, CHARLIE.

292. YOU CAN SAY THE LINE.

293. "YOUR MAJESTY, I WAS BORN TO DANCE."

294. "YOUR MAJESTY, I WAS BORN TO DANCE."

295. OH! ( chuckles )

296. WHO'S THE CHARLIE WHISPERER NOW?

297. ALL RIGHT, HERE HE IS—

298. BERT DOOGAN, FAMOUS ASTRONAUT.

299. WELL, BERT.

300. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR JOINING US.

301. WHY DON'T YOU TELL US A LITTLE BIT ABOUT YOURSELF?

302. COULD BERT TAKE OFF HIS HELMET?

303. UH, NO. NEXT QUESTION.

304. SO WE HAVE A SPEAKER WHO CAN'T ACTUALLY SPEAK?

305. OKAY, KIDS. LET'S ALL LINE UP

306. AND WE CAN ALL TOUCH BERT'S HELMET

307. AND THEN HE'LL BE ON HIS WAY.

308. I'LL GO FIRST.

309. GABE, WHO IS THIS?

310. IT'S BERT, MY NEIGHBOR.

311. BERT LOOKS SURPRISINGLY YOUNG.

312. OH, THANK YOU, DEAR. THAT'S SWEET OF YOU TO SAY.

313. GABE, I WANT THE TRUTH.

314. ( sighs ) OKAY.

315. THE TRUTH IS THAT...

316. ON HIS LAST MISSION, BERT WENT THROUGH A WORMHOLE

317. SENDING HIM BACK IN TIME.

318. GABE DUNCAN, I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER.

319. YOU KNOW, YOU REALLY SHOULD HAVE.

320. WELL, I SHOULD GET GOING.

321. TO INFINITY AND BEYOND!

322. OH HEY, HON'.

323. HEY!

324. THERE'S MY BABY BOY.

325. ( clears throat ) BOB, HON', YOU—

326. YOU MISSING SOMETHING?

327. WHA— OH! THIS?

328. AW, I JUST DECIDED

329. TO UPDATE THE WORK THREADS.

330. WELL, SWEETIE.

331. YOU'RE AN EXTERMINATOR. ISN'T THE POINT OF YOUR UNIFORM

332. TO PROTECT YOU FROM THINGS THAT STING AND BITE?

333. HEY,

334. THESE CANNONS ARE MY PROTECTION.

335. OH.

336. DADDY'S GONE CRAZY.

337. MAMA'S GONNA FIX IT.

338. - HEY. - WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

339. - ( sighs ) - AND WHERE'S CHARLIE?

340. SHE'S AT HOME.

341. WHAT?

342. SHE REFUSED TO COME.

343. AND THEN WHEN I ASKED HER NICELY,

344. SHE TURNED OFF HER EARS AND SHE RAN AWAY FROM ME.

345. HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?

346. LOOK, IT'S NOT COMPLETELY MY FAULT.

347. OKAY? A GOOD DIRECTOR WOULD HAVE CHOSEN TAMMY!

348. TEDDY, THE—

349. THE YOUNG PRINCESS GOES ON IN TWO MINUTES.

350. WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?

351. ( sighs ) I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT.

352. ( high-pitched ) YOUR MAJESTY,

353. I WAS BORN TO DANCE!

354. HEY. WHAT'S GOIN' ON?

355. VERN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

356. I'M HERE BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, MAN.

357. UH-OH.

358. BOB, HONEY. COME HERE. HAVE A SEAT NEXT TO ME.

359. NOW, SWEETIE, WE HAVE SOME THINGS WE'D LIKE TO SAY,

360. SO PLEASE JUST HEAR US OUT.

361. TEDDY? YOU START.

362. ( sighs ) DAD,

363. I MISS THE OLD YOU.

364. YOU KNOW, THE NORMAL GUY

365. WHOSE CLOTHES AREN'T TIGHTER THAN MINE.

366. OKAY. P.J.

367. DAD,

368. I WANT US TO SHOP AT DIFFERENT STORES.

369. I DON'T WANT US TO HAVE THE SAME PANTS.

370. FOR THE RECORD,

371. I LOVE YOUR NEW LOOK!

372. IT'S A COMEDIC GOLD MINE.

373. FOR INSTANCE—

374. UH, UH, THANK YOU, GABE.

375. VERN?

376. WOULD YOU LIKE TO SHARE?

377. LOOK AT ME, BOSS.

378. I HAD TO EXPOSE MY FLESH TO THE ENEMY

379. JUST SO YOU COULD SHOW OFF YOUR GUNS.

380. WHAT'S GOING ON, BOB?

381. ARE YOU HAVING SOME SORT OF A MID-LIFE CRISIS?

382. NO!

383. I— ( groans )

384. ALL RIGHT.

385. A COUPLE OF MONTHS AGO

386. I'M IN THE PARK WITH TOBY

387. AND, UH—

388. SOMEBODY THOUGHT I WAS HIS GRANDFATHER.

389. SO YOU WENT THROUGH ALL OF THIS

390. BECAUSE OF SOME OFF-HANDED COMMENT FROM A STRANGER?

391. YEAH!

392. BUT IT— GUYS, IT INSPIRED ME

393. TO LOSE WEIGHT, GET IN SHAPE.

394. AND YOUR NEW BODY IS GREAT.

395. WHAT YOU'VE CHOSEN TO PUT ON YOUR NEW BODY—

396. NOT SO GREAT.

397. DAD.

398. WILL YOU ACCEPT OUR HELP AND RETURN THOSE CLOTHES TODAY?

399. THERE'S A CAR WAITING OUTSIDE

400. TO TAKE YOU TO AN AGE-APPROPRIATE STORE.

401. ALL RIGHT, FINE. I'LL GO.

402. BUT, UM— YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO GIVE ME 20 MINUTES

403. TO GET OUT OF THESE PANTS.

404. Well, Charlie.

405. Dad returned all the clothes,

406. so there's one less teenager in the house.

407. And in other news—

408. Hey! Keep it down in there!

409. Gabe got in trouble at school, so now he has to interview

410. our neighbor Bert for real.

411. Now where was I?

412. 1983.

413. 1983.

414. The first-class stamp cost 20¢

415. and the zip plus-four code was established.

416. - ( mouthing ) - Now the Z.P.4. code

417. was originally supposed to be just a Z.P.3.

418. Now this is where it gets complicated,

419. so just stay with me.

420. It looks like Gabe's gonna be there a while.

421. Wish him good luck, Charlie.

422. ALL RIGHT, VERN. YOU WANNA LOOK GOOD IN THAT UNIFORM,

423. WE GOTTA GET YOU INTO SHAPE.

424. ALL RIGHT.

425. NOW BEFORE WE BEGIN,

426. WE NEED TO STRETCH OUT.

427. YOU ARE LIMBER!

428. ALL RIGHT, LET'S TRY SOME SIT-UPS.

429. NOW WATCH MY TECHNIQUE.

430. ALL RIGHT, YOUR TURN.

431. - ( groans ) - VERN? YOU OKAY?

432. I THINK I DID A LITTLE BIT TOO MUCH TOO FAST, BOSS.