1. They're splendid
with magic. Yay!
Copy !req
2. I don't know what
to say about that.
Copy !req
3. When you're a winner,
go to dinner.
Copy !req
4. Pizza party!
Copy !req
5. - Thanks for
the ride home, evan.
- Sure.
Copy !req
6. You didn't mind sitting
through my practice?
Copy !req
7. Oh, no no no,
not at all.
Copy !req
8. You look cute
in your uniform.
Copy !req
9. - I'm on the swim team.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
10. - Hey.
- Oh, uh, evan,
this is my brother gabe.
Copy !req
11. - Gabe, this is evan.
- Wait a minute.
Copy !req
12. - Don't I know you
from somewhere?
- I don't think so.
Copy !req
13. I've definitely
seen you before.
Copy !req
14. Hey, why don't you go
check your room?
Copy !req
15. Lots of really good
clues there.
Copy !req
16. - I should get going.
See you tomorrow?
- Bye.
Copy !req
17. Yeah.
Copy !req
18. Oh god.
Thanks a lot.
Copy !req
19. What did I do?
Copy !req
20. He's been driving
me home every day
for the past two weeks.
Copy !req
21. I think he was finally
going to ask me out
Copy !req
22. Until you scared him off
with all your talking
Copy !req
23. And pointing and— ugh.
Copy !req
24. I'm sorry,
but he looks familiar.
Copy !req
25. Was he my camp counselor?
Copy !req
26. No no no, he seemed
afraid of me,
Copy !req
27. But not that afraid of me.
Copy !req
28. Why would a totally hot guy
like evan know you?
Copy !req
29. What's wrong with me?
Slegowart!
Copy !req
30. You say things
like "slegowart."
Copy !req
31. No no, slegowart
is a character in pokeo.
Copy !req
32. That's how I know evan—
from the game store.
Copy !req
33. Evan plays pokeo?
Copy !req
34. That nerdy card game
with those stupid
cartoon creatures?
Copy !req
35. No.
Copy !req
36. Evan plays pokeo,
the fantasy card game
Copy !req
37. That requires a keen level
of skill and strategy.
Copy !req
38. But why would evan play that?
That's for little kids.
Copy !req
39. Wigimon is for little kids.
Copy !req
40. Pokeo is for nine and up.
Copy !req
41. How is that possible?
Copy !req
42. Now the cute hot guy
is a secret nerd?
Copy !req
43. Well, many of us in the world
of fantasy card games
Copy !req
44. Are considered
quite attractive.
Copy !req
45. - Mom's home!
- Hey, honey!
Copy !req
46. Hey, the banquet's tonight.
Did you rent me a tux?
Copy !req
47. - It's right over there.
- Okay.
Copy !req
48. Did you get me the one
that makes me look like
james bond?
Copy !req
49. Yeah, honey, I got you
the magic tux.
Copy !req
50. Mom, did you type my report?
You know, because of
my broken finger?
Copy !req
51. - Yes, I typed your report.
- What's it about?
Copy !req
52. - The civil war.
- What's my take?
Copy !req
53. - Why don't you read it?
- No, that's the teacher's job.
Copy !req
54. Mom, I'm hungry.
Is there anything to eat?
Copy !req
55. What's that thing filled
with food right next to you?
Copy !req
56. Dad?
Copy !req
57. Hey, mom,
could you help out
Copy !req
58. With my school car wash
on Saturday morning?
Copy !req
59. Honey, that's my only day
off work.
Copy !req
60. Perfect.
So you're free.
Copy !req
61. All right,
bring your own chamois.
Copy !req
62. Okay okay, stop.
Copy !req
63. I need five minutes
of peace, please.
Copy !req
64. That is a wonderful idea.
You just sit there and relax.
Copy !req
65. Thank you.
Copy !req
66. - I'm not seeing the bow tie—
- oh my— okay, come on.
Let's go, charlie.
Copy !req
67. You're the only one
who isn't annoying me
right now.
Copy !req
68. There's no cover page.
Copy !req
69. Boom.
( cooing )
Copy !req
70. Where's my nose?
Copy !req
71. That's my nose.
That's great.
Copy !req
72. What else do you know?
Where's my ear?
Copy !req
73. That's my ear.
Copy !req
74. Where's my eye?
Copy !req
75. Ow! Ow.
Oh my gosh.
Copy !req
76. - Wow, she got me. Ow.
- What?
Copy !req
77. Ow, charlie poked me
in the eye.
Copy !req
78. Oh, I can't open my eye.
Bob, it really hurts.
Copy !req
79. Mom, maybe you should
get it checked out.
Copy !req
80. Teddy, I'm a nurse.
Copy !req
81. I don't need you
to tell me
Copy !req
82. When I need to get
something checked out.
Copy !req
83. Bob, I need
to get this
checked out.
Copy !req
84. Well, amy, it doesn't
look like your cornea
is scratched.
Copy !req
85. I'm going to prescribe
some drops.
Copy !req
86. Wear this eyepatch overnight
and you'll be good to go.
Copy !req
87. You mean go,
as in go home?
Copy !req
88. Well, that's good news,
isn't it?
Copy !req
89. Well, home is where
the cooking and cleaning
Copy !req
90. And laundry and homework
and husband and kids and—
Copy !req
91. ( crying )
I don't wanna go home.
Copy !req
92. But there's nothing
wrong with you.
Copy !req
93. - ( crying continues )
- well, with your eye.
Copy !req
94. Can't you just
keep me overnight
for observation?
Copy !req
95. Amy, as a nurse you know
that's not appropriate.
Copy !req
96. This is not a hotel.
Copy !req
97. You know what else isn't
appropriate, dr. Meyers?
Copy !req
98. Telling people you're
working at the free clinic
Copy !req
99. When you're really
playing 18 holes
Copy !req
100. At the denver
country club.
Copy !req
101. I think you'll enjoy
room 207.
Copy !req
102. Where's mom?
Copy !req
103. Oh no, she didn't
make it, did she?
Copy !req
104. Your mom is going
to be fine.
Copy !req
105. No, I'm talking
about the meatloaf.
Copy !req
106. She didn't make it,
did she?
Copy !req
107. You know, the concern
you have for the woman
Copy !req
108. Who gave birth to you
is overwhelming.
Copy !req
109. She was going
to wrap it in bacon.
Copy !req
110. Really?
Copy !req
111. Wait a minute.
What am I thinking about?
Copy !req
112. I've got my banquet
tonight.
Copy !req
113. Hey, you wanna
come with?
Copy !req
114. Denver pest control
association puts on
quite a do.
Copy !req
115. - I don't know.
- Why not?
Copy !req
116. Because I had trouble
staying awake during
that sentence.
Copy !req
117. Are you telling me
you don't wanna see
your old man
Copy !req
118. Win the exterminator
of the year award?
Copy !req
119. Oh right, that award
you think you're going
to win every year,
Copy !req
120. But you don't because
murray always does.
Copy !req
121. Look, there is no way
that the same guy
Copy !req
122. - Can win every year.
- Why not?
Copy !req
123. The same guy loses
every year.
Copy !req
124. All right, you know what?
Enough about murray.
Copy !req
125. Do you wanna see your father
win the award or not?
Copy !req
126. Murray's my dad?
Copy !req
127. - ( knocking at door )
- teddy: Mom?
Copy !req
128. Oh my—
Copy !req
129. How are you feeling?
Copy !req
130. - Oh, a little better.
- Yeah?
Copy !req
131. But I miss you
and charlie and...
Copy !req
132. The others.
Copy !req
133. I'm glad one of us
is doing well.
Copy !req
134. That's nice.
Copy !req
135. Thank you for coming.
Copy !req
136. Mom, I just got here.
Copy !req
137. Oh right. Ha.
Well, how are you?
Copy !req
138. Well, actually
there's this boy evan
Copy !req
139. That I really like,
but, um...
Copy !req
140. I found out something
kind of disturbing about him.
Copy !req
141. He's into pokeo.
Copy !req
142. Pokeo? That thing
gabe likes?
Copy !req
143. Well, honey, what would
you see in a guy like that?
Copy !req
144. Well, this is evan
at a swim meet.
Copy !req
145. Yeah, that explains that.
Copy !req
146. Well, honey,
no one's perfect.
Everyone has their flaws.
Copy !req
147. You think I was thrilled
when I found out your
father was into bugs?
Copy !req
148. But you got over it?
Copy !req
149. Yeah, that's what I did—
got over it.
Copy !req
150. Look, honey, relationships
are about compromise.
Copy !req
151. If you really like
this guy,
Copy !req
152. Try being interested
in things he's interested in.
Copy !req
153. On my second date
with your father
Copy !req
154. I threw out three facts
about bark beetles.
Copy !req
155. Ha ha,
the man was mine.
Copy !req
156. Well, I've taken up
enough of your time.
Copy !req
157. Mom, didn't you get poked
in the other eye?
Copy !req
158. No no, it was—
it was this eye.
Copy !req
159. I'm pretty sure
it was the other one.
Copy !req
160. No no no no.
Copy !req
161. Oh gosh,
let mama rest, dear.
Copy !req
162. Let mama rest.
( groans )
Copy !req
163. Okay, let's do this
one more time.
Copy !req
164. I'm putting down
my dragony card.
Copy !req
165. What's your
counterattack?
Copy !req
166. Um...
Copy !req
167. - Weepok?
- Weepok?
Copy !req
168. You played a weepok
when you could have played
a scalamaster?
Copy !req
169. Scalamaster— that's—
that's the octopus dude
Copy !req
170. With the suction cup
thingies?
Copy !req
171. Vortexes.
They're called vortexes.
Copy !req
172. You know what?
I can't work with you.
Copy !req
173. You have no respect
for the mythical world
of dort.
Copy !req
174. Oh no.
Copy !req
175. Gabe, please, just give me
one more chance.
Copy !req
176. Forget it.
Forget it.
Copy !req
177. - This is hopeless.
- You're right.
Copy !req
178. I feel like gasio going up
against misrod.
Copy !req
179. Wait a minute.
That wasn't wrong.
Copy !req
180. - It wasn't?
- No no.
Copy !req
181. Gasio would have no chance
against misrod because?
Copy !req
182. Because grass power
is no match for
volcano power?
Copy !req
183. Yes yes yes!
Copy !req
184. Wow, teachers really do
make a difference.
Copy !req
185. - ( knocking at door )
- bob: Honey?
Copy !req
186. Honey? Hey.
Copy !req
187. How are you feeling,
sweetie?
Copy !req
188. ( mumbles )
I've been better.
Copy !req
189. Well, I got something
that's going to help
cheer you up.
Copy !req
190. Tada!
Copy !req
191. Exterminator of the year!
Copy !req
192. You won?
That is fantastic!
Copy !req
193. Oh, honey,
I'm so proud of you!
Copy !req
194. I gave a great big speech
and everything.
Copy !req
195. - Aw, did you say
something nice about me?
- Of course I did.
Copy !req
196. P.J., he got the whole thing
recorded on his phone.
Copy !req
197. - Show her the speech.
- Yeah, let me see it.
Copy !req
198. Dad, can I speak to you
outside for a second?
Copy !req
199. - What?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
200. - What the heck are you doing?
- Go go go.
Copy !req
201. - You can't show mom
that video.
- Why not?
Copy !req
202. - Because you don't thank her.
- Oh, that's ridiculous.
Copy !req
203. - You don't even mention her.
- Of course I did.
Copy !req
204. Let's take a look.
Copy !req
205. Okay. Oh, man,
where do I start?
Copy !req
206. Oh yeah,
in your face, murray!
Copy !req
207. Huh?
Copy !req
208. I want to—
Copy !req
209. You know what?
I want to—
Copy !req
210. I want to thank my kids
p.J., teddy, gabe, charlie,
Copy !req
211. Who make me want to work
so hard every day.
Copy !req
212. Oh, and how about a shout-out
to all the bugs out there, huh?
Copy !req
213. Without whom none of us
would be here.
Copy !req
214. Most importantly
I want to thank
Copy !req
215. One very special lady
tonight—
Copy !req
216. My waitress!
Iris!
Copy !req
217. Keep 'em comin', baby!
Copy !req
218. I'm a winner!
Copy !req
219. Wow, that's not good.
Copy !req
220. Oh man.
Copy !req
221. What am I gonna do?
Copy !req
222. - You could tell mom
the truth.
- Or?
Copy !req
223. I could tell mom
the truth?
Copy !req
224. Or?
Copy !req
225. We could sneak out of here
and think of something later?
Copy !req
226. Ding ding ding ding.
Copy !req
227. Thanks again
for giving me a ride.
Copy !req
228. Thanks again for waiting
till my swim practice was over.
Copy !req
229. Thank me?
Thank you.
Copy !req
230. - Same time tomorrow?
- Yeah, sounds good.
Copy !req
231. - All right.
- Hey, could you
do me a favor
Copy !req
232. And grab my keys
out of my backpack?
Copy !req
233. Sure.
Copy !req
234. You have pokeo cards?
Copy !req
235. Oh no, you weren't
supposed to see those.
Copy !req
236. I'm so embarrassed.
Copy !req
237. Don't be.
I'm into pokeo too.
Copy !req
238. Wait, what?
Copy !req
239. I didn't want to
say anything because...
Copy !req
240. I was afraid you'd
think I was weird.
Copy !req
241. Wait, yeah, that's why
I didn't want to say
anything to you.
Copy !req
242. My dream is to become
a level-four card master
Copy !req
243. And earn
my gorgonic shield.
Copy !req
244. That's my dream.
Copy !req
245. Wait, what?
Copy !req
246. Will you go out
with me?
Copy !req
247. Does scalamaster
have vortexes?
Copy !req
248. Yeah.
Copy !req
249. Are you sure
this is going to work?
Copy !req
250. Trust me, it's going
to look exactly like
your real acceptance speech.
Copy !req
251. But you might want
to move charlie.
Copy !req
252. Huh? Oh okay.
Copy !req
253. Come here, sweetie.
Come on.
Copy !req
254. Let's help daddy
deceive mommy.
Copy !req
255. Okay let's make
some magic, bobby.
Copy !req
256. - Ready?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
257. - Okay.
- Okay.
Copy !req
258. On. Action!
Copy !req
259. Hey hey!
Hey, okay, whoo.
Copy !req
260. I have— no.
No no no.
Copy !req
261. ( stuttering )
I want to—
Copy !req
262. I want to thank my wife
amy b. Duncan.
Copy !req
263. Cut. Dad, you are
stiff as a board.
Copy !req
264. - Help me.
- Show me some emotion.
Copy !req
265. Okay.
All right, action.
Copy !req
266. Thank you for this award.
Copy !req
267. This is one
of the great moments
of my life.
Copy !req
268. - ( ringing )
- cut. I gotta take this.
Copy !req
269. Hello?
Copy !req
270. Oh no, I'm not
doing anything.
Copy !req
271. What's going on?
Copy !req
272. Sorry I had
to bring charlie
on our first date.
Copy !req
273. I kind of thought
my mom would be out
of the hospital by now.
Copy !req
274. Actually I'm excited
you brought her.
Copy !req
275. She's going to make this
even better.
Copy !req
276. Yeah, what is this anyway?
What are we doing?
Copy !req
277. - We're going to larp.
- Larp?
Copy !req
278. "larp" stands for
"live action role-play."
Copy !req
279. Anyone can play pokeo
with cards,
Copy !req
280. But when you
put on the costumes
and you act it out,
Copy !req
281. It takes it
to a whole new level.
Copy !req
282. Oh, you're joking, right?
Copy !req
283. Oh, you're not joking.
Copy !req
284. Guys, this is teddy
and charlie.
Copy !req
285. Teddy and charlie,
this is slugmar,
Copy !req
286. Weepok, scalamaster,
and gulagon.
Copy !req
287. You brought girls.
We've never had girls.
Copy !req
288. Okay.
Copy !req
289. Well, since
we're not really dressed
Copy !req
290. For the whole larping thing,
Copy !req
291. Charlie and I are just
going to go sit over here
while you guys play.
Copy !req
292. Oh, no no no, don't worry.
I thought of everything.
Copy !req
293. And the best part is
we're out in public.
Copy !req
294. Oh, bad news, mom.
Copy !req
295. You got a b-
on my civil war report.
Copy !req
296. Not your best work.
Copy !req
297. I'll try harder
next time.
Copy !req
298. So, honey,
ready to see
my big speech?
Copy !req
299. That I shot
with my phone...
Copy !req
300. At the hotel...
Copy !req
301. The other night.
Copy !req
302. Just hit "play."
Copy !req
303. - ( applause )
- thank you, thank you,
thank you.
Copy !req
304. Thank you,
denver pest control
association.
Copy !req
305. Not a very nice
hotel this year.
Copy !req
306. Uh, it's budget cuts.
( clears throat )
Copy !req
307. You know, winning
an award like this
is incredible,
Copy !req
308. But I'm already a winner
Copy !req
309. Because of
my wonderful wife amy.
Copy !req
310. When I think about
this amazing woman...
Copy !req
311. I get all emotional.
Copy !req
312. Wait, what is that?
Copy !req
313. P.J., rewind.
Copy !req
314. There, pause.
Copy !req
315. - Bob, what's going on?
- All right, look...
Copy !req
316. Honey, the truth is
in all the excitement
of that night
Copy !req
317. With the award
and the lights—
Copy !req
318. I don't know.
Copy !req
319. I just— I forgot
to thank you.
Copy !req
320. And then we made the tape
to cover up the lie
Copy !req
321. And I just—
I'm really really sorry.
Copy !req
322. Look, bob, I really—
I appreciate the effort,
Copy !req
323. But why did you have
to lie to me?
Copy !req
324. I mean if we don't
have honesty,
Copy !req
325. What do we have here?
Copy !req
326. What do we have here?
Copy !req
327. Mom, according to
your chart,
Copy !req
328. It says there's nothing
wrong with your eye
Copy !req
329. And you should have
gone home yesterday.
Copy !req
330. Hey, you wanna pretend
the last minute of our lives
never happened?
Copy !req
331. What last minute?
Copy !req
332. Our two peoples have been
in conflict for many years.
Copy !req
333. Mm.
Copy !req
334. Today the final
battle begins.
Copy !req
335. Chicapu is supposed to say,
"assume the positions
Copy !req
336. And prepare for
the gorgonic war."
Copy !req
337. - Charlie, say "go."
- go!
Copy !req
338. Chicapu has spoken.
Let the battle commence!
Copy !req
339. - Wardart, come quick!
- ( boy yelling )
Copy !req
340. Ha! Feel my wrath,
you knaves!
Copy !req
341. Never!
Vengeance will be mine
in the name of gorgon.
Copy !req
342. Hey, evan, evan,
what am I supposed to do?
Copy !req
343. - Reality!
- For crying out loud.
Copy !req
344. You can't call me
by my human name.
Copy !req
345. - I'm slegowart.
- I'm sorry, slegowart.
Copy !req
346. No, now I'm evan.
Copy !req
347. Okay, guys, we've been
in reality for too long.
Copy !req
348. Game on!
Copy !req
349. Ooh!
Copy !req
350. I am wounded.
Copy !req
351. Chicapu, you're a worthy
adversary indeed.
Copy !req
352. Quick, wardart,
throw your fireball.
Copy !req
353. No, not at me.
No, not—
Copy !req
354. Ha ha, dead!
You are dead.
Copy !req
355. What is wrong with you?
Copy !req
356. Well, you told me
to throw it.
Copy !req
357. Not at me.
I'm out of the game now.
Copy !req
358. Well, can't you just call
backsies or something?
Copy !req
359. Backsies?
What are you, five?
Copy !req
360. Oh, I'm five?
Copy !req
361. You're the one
running around the park
Copy !req
362. Dressed like a giant frog.
Copy !req
363. I am a magic toad.
Copy !req
364. Yes yes, you are,
Copy !req
365. Which means
I must now leave
Copy !req
366. The mythical land
of nerdingham,
Copy !req
367. For I have lost interest
Copy !req
368. No matter how good
thou looketh in a swimsuit.
Copy !req
369. Chicapu, away!
Copy !req
370. Come here, you.
Okay.
Copy !req
371. So you brought
that girl here
on a date?
Copy !req
372. Yeah.
Copy !req
373. So it's almost as if
I were on a date.
Copy !req
374. Hey, charlie.
Copy !req
375. Listen, when you
get to be my age,
Copy !req
376. Don't pretend
to be someone you're not
just to impress a guy.
Copy !req
377. I just learned that.
Copy !req
378. I also learned that
if you walk home
from the park
Copy !req
379. Dressed like
a giant chicken,
Copy !req
380. You're going to be
chased by a dog.
Copy !req
381. Hey, did you touch
my pokeo cards?
Copy !req
382. - No.
- Liar!
Copy !req
383. There's a bent corner
on my slugmar card.
Copy !req
384. Mom!
Copy !req
385. Oh, one more thing.
Copy !req
386. If you fall for a guy
with something in common
with gabe,
Copy !req
387. Good luck, charlie.
Copy !req
388. - Lewis!
- Hello, mr. D.
Copy !req
389. Come on in.
Copy !req
390. Hey, teddy,
lewis is here.
Copy !req
391. Actually I came here
to talk to you, bob.
Copy !req
392. - Can I call you bob?
- Can you?
Copy !req
393. It would be my pleasure.
Copy !req
394. Well, bob,
as you know
Copy !req
395. I've been spending
a lot of time with teddy
Copy !req
396. And things are going
very well.
Copy !req
397. And amy and I are absolutely
thrilled about that.
Copy !req
398. My future is bright, sir.
Copy !req
399. I have a good part-time job
at the comic book store.
Copy !req
400. - I own my own bike.
- I think I know where
this is headed.
Copy !req
401. I guess what I'm trying
to say is...
Copy !req
402. I'd like your permission
to ask teddy
Copy !req
403. To be my g-girlfriend.
Copy !req
404. - Welcome to the family, son.
- ( mouths word )
Copy !req
405. Reality!
Copy !req
406. Well, thank you
for the larp,
mr. Duncan.
Copy !req
407. Just go wash
the car, lewis.
Copy !req
408. Yes, sir.
Copy !req