1. Hey, you know what I was thinking, honey?
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2. We should have a little romantic getaway.
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3. This weekend just you and me.
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4. Guys, please, we're trying to eat here.
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5. I think that sounds fun.
Where should we go?
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6. Casper, Wyoming...
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7. The most romantic city.
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8. In Wyoming.
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9. Is the bug convention in Casper this year?
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10. The bug convention?
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11. Well, I'll just check the old calendar.
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12. Ha! Now that
is a coincidence.
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13. Hey, mom, I think you should go.
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14. Why? You planning to throw
a party while we're gone?
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15. Now that is a coincidence.
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16. Oh. Well, party's off.
I'm not going.
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17. Why not, mom?
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18. Bug convention sounds like a lot of...
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19. I can't even get through it.
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20. What do you even do at a bug convention?
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21. Nothing. It's just a
bunch of exterminators.
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22. In a cramped conference room
talking about deadly gas.
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23. And then it gets boring.
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24. First of all, honey, we are not a bunch.
We are a swarm.
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25. Huh?
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26. We got a lot of fun
bug-related lingo like that,
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27. Like we don't get rooms, we nest.
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28. We don't dine, we feed.
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29. I can't believe I'm saying this, but
can someone drive me to school?
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30. All right, guys, you know what?
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31. Pest control is what I do for a living.
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32. I know it just may be rats
and roaches and maggots to you,
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33. But it's my bread and butter.
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34. And I'm done with my bread and butter.
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35. d today's all burnt toast d
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36. d running late
and dad jokes d
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37. d "has anybody
seen my left shoe?" d
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38. d I close my eyes,
take a bite d
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39. d grab a ride,
laugh out loud d
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40. d there it is
up on the roof d
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41. d I've been there,
I survived d
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42. d so just take my advice d
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43. d hang in there, baby,
things are crazy d
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44. d but I know
your future's bright d
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45. d hang in there, baby d
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46. d there's no maybe d
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47. d everything
turns out all right d
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48. d sure life is up and down d
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49. d but trust me,
it comes back around d
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50. d you're gonna love
who you turn out to be d
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51. d hang in there, baby. D
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52. - Hey, mom.
- Hey, honey.
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53. Remember when I went off
to college to k.C.U.?
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54. Kwikki chikki university,
seminar. End training
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55. I remember it well.
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56. Well, back in those crazy college days...
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57. Those two crazy college days.
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58. I met this guy named gravy
ever in town, m if he was.
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59. He could stay with us.
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60. And I just found out he's moving to Denver,
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61. And he's gonna be working at kwikki chikki.
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62. Okay, I think I see when is this happening?
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63. Party!
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64. Right about now.
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65. P.J., I can't believe
on me at a time like this. Est.
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66. - Gravy!
- P.J.!
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67. That was the kwikki chikki handshake.
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68. I was hoping.
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69. Dude, you didn't tell me
your sister was so hot.
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70. Gravy, stay as long as you like.
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71. Sweet crib!
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72. Dude, I'm so psyched you're here, dude.
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73. - This is gonna be a blast.
- Epic!
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74. - Just think of all those wild
times at college. - Yeah.
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75. Dude, remember the time the girls from
hamburger tech came and partied with us?
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76. Yeah yeah!
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77. Or what about the time...
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78. I think that's the only story we have.
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79. Hey, mom, listen to this.
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80. It's from that advice
column "dear Tammy."
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81. It says, "dear Tammy,
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82. Recently a car I owned for 20 minutes.
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83. Was sadly wrecked.
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84. "How do I ask my parents
for another one?"
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85. - That's almost exactly what
happened to you. - I know.
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86. So then dear Tammy replied,
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87. "if your parents love you,
they will buy you a new car.
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88. And be glad they did."
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89. - That is so strange.
- Yeah.
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90. Because dear Tammy passed
away three years ago.
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91. Well, that's a pretty good
answer for a dead lady, right?
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92. Mom, please, owning that car was
the best 20 minutes of my life.
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93. Honey, if it were up to me,
I'd buy you a new car.
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94. The problem is your father.
He's been on a tear lately about saving money.
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95. What is wrong with him?
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96. He's always saving and
planning for the future.
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97. What did grandma and grandpa do to him?
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98. How badly do you want this car?
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99. - Really badly.
- Sit down.
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100. Teddy,
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101. Your father is a simple man.
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102. - Yes, I'm with you so far.
- Okay.
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103. If you want something from him,
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104. Then you need to do
something he wants to do.
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105. Then when he's in his happy place,
just strike like a cobra.
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106. Okay, what are you talking about?
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107. The bug convention, Teddy...
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108. The bug convention.
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109. You go there with your father
and he will be so happy...
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110. He will buy you a car.
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111. Perfect. I'll go to the bug convention.
How bad could it be?
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112. You have no idea.
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113. I went to one convention.
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114. I still have the dreams.
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115. Hey, Gabe, guess what I got.
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116. Last time we played this game, it was lice.
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117. My mom gave me this cool new video camera.
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118. For getting cut from the baseball team.
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119. How does getting cut from
the team get you a camera?
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120. She felt bad for me, and my dad gave
me a skateboard for trying out.
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121. I love sports.
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122. This is pretty cool.
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123. - We should make a movie.
- Yeah.
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124. Ew!
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125. The camera does not love you.
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126. But it does love me.
So I should be the star.
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127. Dude, you're getting more
like your mom every day.
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128. So what kind of movie ould we make?
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129. How about a romantic comedy?
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130. Everyone loves a good romcom.
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131. I thought of something
while you were talking.
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132. Let's make a monster movie.
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133. Cool, but where are we
gonna find a scary monster?
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134. Boo!
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135. I think we found our monster.
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136. Done, done...
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137. And not done.
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138. How are you doing,
a. Dunc?
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139. A. Dunc?
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140. Oh, yeah. That's my
new name for you.
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141. Amy just wasn't kind of working for me.
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142. Aren't you loving him?
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143. Loving? No no.
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144. Liking? No.
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145. Getting on my very last nerve?
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146. Ding ding ding!
We have a winner.
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147. Gravy honey, did you forget
something in the kitchen?
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148. No, I'm good.
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149. I meant your pants.
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150. Yeah, I know. I just like to
take those off when I get home.
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151. It's kind of how I unwind.
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152. Okay, look, I get it that you're
trying to be comfortable.
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153. That is not how we roll
in the Duncan house.
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154. Dude, you're right.
This is so much more comfortable.
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155. Honey, you're not gonna believe this.
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156. Teddy wants to go to the
bug convention with me.
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157. Are we going pantsless now?
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158. This is the best day ever!
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159. "attack
of the 50-foot baby, "
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160. Scene 1, take 1.
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161. Okay, you're a mad scientist.
Action!
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162. Now that I've finished
my super growth formula,
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163. It's time to test it out
on an ordinary grape.
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164. Cut.
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165. Action.
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166. It works on fruit, It works on fruit,
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167. But what about on human beings?
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168. I'll test it out myself.
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169. But first let me check on my baby.
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170. Baby. Oh, baby!
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171. Charlie, come here.
Come here.
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172. - Can you go drink the stuff now?
- No.
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173. It's just juice.
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174. And cut.
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175. Dude, what's your sister's problem?
She's gotta drink the stuff.
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176. She's two.
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177. When I was two, I drank everything.
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178. Just let me talk to her.
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179. Charlie sweetheart,
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180. You're doing great.
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181. The picture's gonna look terrific.
Here's the thing.
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182. When we say drink the stuff,
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183. You gotta drink the stuff, okay?
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184. Okay, great.
Here we go.
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185. Are you ready to...
Jake, what are you doing?
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186. We need that for the movie.
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187. I'm doing an experiment.
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188. I wanna see if it turns my pee blue.
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189. P.J.!
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190. Hey, mom, what's up?
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191. What's up?
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192. Look at what gravy has done to this place.
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193. Hey, he tidied up.
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194. I've had it.
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195. He's disgusting.
He's a slob.
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196. I can't take it anymore.
I want him out.
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197. Is this about the onion ring in the toilet?
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198. 'cause he needs a target.
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199. Either you tell him by the
end of the day tomorrow,
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200. Or I do it.
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201. But he's my best friend from college.
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202. Chicken college,
a two-day chicken college!
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203. All right, okay.
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204. But this has to be done the right way
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205. 'cause gravy's actually really sensitive.
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206. All right, bad news, guys.
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207. I just drank a gallon of water
and we are out of onion rings.
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208. Casper, Wyoming,
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209. Bug convention, guys in overalls.
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210. You talk now.
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211. Hey, hors d'oeuvres.
Help yourself, honey.
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212. Okay.
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213. This is good.
It's crunchy.
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214. Freeze-dried ants.
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215. All the food here is insect-based.
Isn't that fun?
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216. - Bob.
- Murray.
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217. Hey, I would like to introduce
you to my daughter Teddy.
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218. Hi. Hey, dad, do I have
any legs in my teeth?
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219. She's a charmer.
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220. So, Bob, you gonna pop by my speech?
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221. Keynote address, whatever.
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222. Yeah, I got a new way to kill termites...
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223. The Murray method.
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224. Well, actually, Murray, I'm
going on right after you.
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225. Yeah, I got my own new
method of killing termites...
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226. The slam dunc.
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227. I don't get it.
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228. Bob Duncan.
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229. Dunc. Slam dunc.
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230. Ooh, I see
because... no.
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231. Well, I'm sure it will be very clear.
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232. After the presentation.
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233. I've seen your presentations, Duncan.
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234. They lack pizzazz. No visual aids.
That's your problem.
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235. Pass.
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236. Man, I hate that Murray.
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237. But do you know what?
Here's what he doesn't know.
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238. This year I have a visual aid
that is going to blow the roof.
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239. Off this place, thanks to you, honey.
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240. Or should I say.
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241. Termite queen?
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242. - What?
- Yeah!
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243. You're gonna be onstage with me this year.
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244. Playing the disgustingly huge supreme
monarch of the termite colony.
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245. But... but...
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246. Okay.
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247. Hey, gravy.
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248. Can I talk to you for a sec?
It's kind of important.
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249. Of course.
You can tell me anything.
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250. You were my best buddy at kwikki chikki.
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251. I would do anything for you.
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252. I would even eat our chicken for you.
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253. I would never ask you to do that.
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254. Yeah.
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255. But the thing is it's been
super great having you here.
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256. Yeah. Yeah.
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257. But... yeah.
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258. Wow, this is hard.
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259. Actually, there was something
I wanted to tell you.
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260. A. Dunc keeps
rearranging my room.
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261. Not cool, all right?
Talk to her for me?
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262. Dude, I've been home for like an hour.
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263. What am I still doing with my pants on?
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264. The Murray method,
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265. A safe non-toxic elixir
for killing termites,
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266. Derived from the common orange.
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267. Try the Murray method and you'll say,
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268. "orange you glad
you're not a termite?"
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269. Try and top that, Duncan.
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270. Go squeeze yourself.
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271. Hey, everybody,
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272. I am Bob Duncan of Bob's bugs be gone.
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273. Now sure, yes, you can pay Murray.
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274. To go and spray orange
juice all over your house.
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275. Or you can attack.
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276. The problem at its source.
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277. And what is that source?
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278. Ladies and gentlemen,
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279. I give you.
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280. The termite queen!
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281. Gonna get a car.
Gonna get a car.
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282. The termite queen,
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283. The grand royal mama of the colony,
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284. Her only job:
Pumping out termite eggs.
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285. Around the clock.
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286. Behold termite eggs,
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287. 30,000 every single day.
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288. Go, my babies, go.
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289. Eat wood and destroy siding.
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290. Relax, everybody, relax.
Keep your seats.
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291. There is a solution.
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292. Here, your majesty,
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293. Try the slam dunc.
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294. Ha!
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295. Curse you, slam dunc method.
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296. I'm rendered useless.
Do you hear me? Useless.
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297. Oh, what a world.
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298. What a world.
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299. Car.
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300. Okay, you're a 50-foot baby about
to destroy the entire city.
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301. Action.
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302. Cut!
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303. What do you want me to do?
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304. Dude, we're never gonna finish this
movie if she keeps running off.
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305. How do we solve that?
Glue her shoes to the floor?
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306. Okay, these puppies aren't going anywhere.
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307. Charlie.
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308. Dude, your mom.
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309. There you are.
What are you boys doing?
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310. Not gluing shoes to the floor.
That's for sure.
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311. Gabriel Duncan!
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312. She wouldn't do what we wanted.
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313. I should have known.
Every time you ask to watch Charlie,
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314. - It's because you wanna glue
her to something. - Mom.
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315. Sorry, boys, the kid's out of the picture.
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316. Mom, we're not done yet.
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317. Now what are we gonna do?
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318. We got a monster movie with no monster.
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319. Unless...
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320. Now rain down some terror.
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321. Welcome towikki chikki.
Would you like to try our new batter balls?
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322. No.
Good call.
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323. I will have the kwikki combo #3.
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324. With Cole slaw, Curly fries.
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325. And you have to move out by tomorrow.
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326. P.J., is that you?
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327. Yeah, it's me.
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328. I couldn't do this face to face,
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329. So I thought I'd do it face to beak.
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330. Look, gravy, I love you like a brother,
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331. But you're kind of messy and
you're driving my mom nuts,
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332. And you gotta go.
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333. Oh, and I'll have a chocolate milk shake.
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334. Talk to me, man, come on.
You there?
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335. Hey, do you mind?
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336. I'm having a moment here.
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337. Gravy, come on.
Dude, talk to me.
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338. P.J., I'll find
another place to stay.
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339. It's no biggie.
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340. Oh, and that'll be $4.95
at the second window.
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341. I'm sorry, man.
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342. Don't worry about it.
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343. You're my buddy.
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344. The fact that it was so hard
for you to say this to me,
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345. I mean, it means a lot.
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346. So we good?
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347. You wanna flap it out?
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348. Yeah.
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349. Dad, before we go in, there's something
I wanted to talk to you about.
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350. - What's that, honey?
- First, are you happy?
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351. Are you kidding me?
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352. I'm over the moon.
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353. That was the best bug convention ever.
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354. Great, great, 'cause there's
something that I wanted to ask you.
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355. Actually, you know what?
Before you do, there's something I wanna say.
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356. You know, sometimes I just feel.
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357. Like you kids are
growing up so fast that...
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358. That you just don't have
time for your old man.
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359. You know?
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360. So when you asked to come
with me this weekend,
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361. Honey, you made me feel so great.
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362. Thank you.
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363. And I love you very very much.
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364. I'm sorry.
What did you wanna ask me?
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365. Oh, I just wanted to say...
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366. I love you too, dad.
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367. Love you too.
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368. - Hey. - Hey, there's
my little bugaboos.
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369. - How was the convention?
- The best ever.
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370. Hey, Teddy,
tell her all about it.
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371. Okeydokey.
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372. He looks pretty happy.
What kind of car you getting?
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373. I couldn't do it.
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374. What?
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375. You got him all happied up for nothing?
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376. Looks like mama's getting
a new pair of shoes.
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377. Oh, Bob honey.
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378. Hey, Charlie.
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379. Well, I did the right thing... went
with dad to the bug convention,
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380. Made him real happy.
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381. Unfortunately, so happy.
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382. He invited me to go again next year.
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383. I'm gonna be a mosquito.
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384. - What are you doing?
- Just measuring your wingspan.
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385. - Oh. - We're gonna be
selling the Duncan zapper.
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386. Oh, zapper!
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387. Sounds painful.
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388. Now someday you're gonna be
going to these bug conventions.
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389. Yeah.
Good luck, Charlie.
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390. Okay.
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391. Attack of the 50-foot baby, scene 1, take 1.
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392. Attack of the 50-foot baby, scene 1, take 1.
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393. Okay, you're
a mad scientist. Go on... Action!
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394. Now that I've finished
my super growth formula,
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395. It's time to test it out
on an ordinary grape.
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396. It works!
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397. No it doesn't. It's a rubber ducky.
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398. Well... If somebode hadn't
eaten the watermelon,
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399. I wouldn't have to improvise.
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