1. - THAT'S ME, GLENN MARTIN,
FATHER, DENTIST, HOMBRE,Copy !req
2. BUT MOSTLY FATHER
AND DENTIST.Copy !req
3. I TOOK MY FAMILY ON A ROAD TRIP
SO WE CAN GROW CLOSER.Copy !req
4. WELL, THAT, AND I BURNED
THE HOUSE DOWN.Copy !req
5. SO IT'S ME,
MY WIFE, JACKIE—Copy !req
6. SHE'S THE SWEETEST—
OH!Copy !req
7. OUR SON, CONOR;
HE'S UNIQUE,Copy !req
8. HIS SISTER, COURTNEY—Copy !req
9. WE'LL ALL BE WORKING
FOR HER ONE DAY.Copy !req
10. IN FACT, HER ASSISTANT WENDY
ALREADY IS.Copy !req
11. AND THERE'S CANINE.Copy !req
12. HE'LL BE STICKIN' AROUND.Copy !req
13. WANT TO HEAR US WHISTLE?Copy !req
14. - WELCOME TO SUPER VALUE CIRCUS,Copy !req
15. MY FAVORITE OF ALL THE GENERIC
BIG BOX MEGA SUPERSTORES.Copy !req
16. - WHY DO YOU LOVE IT?Copy !req
17. IS IT THEIR LOW PRICES,
THEIR WIDE SELECTION?Copy !req
18. - THEIR SYSTEMIC DESTRUCTION
OF MOM-AND-POP STORESCopy !req
19. COMBINED
WITH UNSAVORY LABOR PRACTICES.Copy !req
20. - WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"BATHROOM BREAK"?Copy !req
21. WHY DO YOU THINK WE GAVE YOU
A CATHETER?Copy !req
22. - NO, IT'S BECAUSE
SUPER VALUE CIRCUS PROVIDESCopy !req
23. THE FINEST FREE FOODCopy !req
24. IN A COMFORTING
WAREHOUSE ENVIRONMENT.Copy !req
25. THAT IS, UNTIL PRICE BARN
STARTS SERVING FALAFEL.Copy !req
26. - TOOTHPICK, SIR?Copy !req
27. - NO, THANKS.
BROUGHT MY OWN.Copy !req
28. EXCELLENT.Copy !req
29. - CAN'T WE JUST GET GRANDMA
AND BERT A WEDDING GIFT ALREADY?Copy !req
30. - I WANT TO GET SOMETHING GOOD.Copy !req
31. YOU KNOW, AFTER THEY'RE MARRIED,Copy !req
32. NOT ONLY WILL I BE THE CENTER
OF MOM'S UNIVERSE,Copy !req
33. BUT BERT'S UNIVERSE AS WELL.Copy !req
34. THE STAKES COULDN'T BE HIGHER.Copy !req
35. THEN AGAIN, IN THEIR EYES,
I COULD DO NO WRONG,Copy !req
36. SO THE STAKES COULDN'T BE LOWER.Copy !req
37. HEY, STEAKS.Copy !req
38. - CAN'T WE JUST GET THEM
A SHINY GRILL?Copy !req
39. - WENDY, THAT'S RACIST.Copy !req
40. JUST BECAUSE
BERT'S AFRICAN AMERICANCopy !req
41. DOESN'T MEAN HE NEEDS TO COVER
HIS TEETH WITH FLASHY BLING.Copy !req
42. SPEAKING OF GRILLS,
CHECK OUT THAT KADDY-LAC GTS.Copy !req
43. THAT'S THAT CADILLAC
OF KADDY-LACS.Copy !req
44. - COOL.Copy !req
45. OW!Copy !req
46. SO LUXURIOUS.Copy !req
47. OW!Copy !req
48. "OBJECTS IN MIRROR
MAY BE CLOSER THAN THEY"--Copy !req
49. OW! OH.Copy !req
50. - WOW. BRIDAL DRESSES.Copy !req
51. THIS PLACE REALLY DOES
HAVE EVERYTHING.Copy !req
52. - SO HOW DO I LOOK?Copy !req
53. - LIKE A SACK OF POTATOES?Copy !req
54. - HOW DARE YOU!Copy !req
55. - NO, I WAS JUST ASKING IF YOU'D
LIKE A SACK OF POTATOES.Copy !req
56. THEY'RE ON SALE.Copy !req
57. - OH, SORRY.Copy !req
58. - BUT YOU DO LOOK HORRIBLE.Copy !req
59. - WELL, AT THESE PRICES,
YOU CAN'T EXPECT TO BE CODDLED.Copy !req
60. DARN IT, MY DRESS
HAS TO BE PERFECT.Copy !req
61. WHICH COLOR SUITS ME BETTER,
SALMON OR TROUT?Copy !req
62. - HOLY MACKEREL.Copy !req
63. - THEY HAVE MACKEREL?Copy !req
64. - NO, I MEAN,
WHY ARE YOU SO STRESSED OUT?Copy !req
65. IT'S JUST A DRESS.Copy !req
66. - ARE YOU KIDDING?Copy !req
67. GRANDMA'S ALWAYS
HAD IT OUT FOR MOM.Copy !req
68. AND FOR HER TO ASK MOM
TO BE HER MAID OF HONOR,Copy !req
69. THAT'S A HUGE STEP.Copy !req
70. - YEAH, LOOKS LIKE THE OLD
JACKIE CHARM IS FINALLY WORKING.Copy !req
71. WELL, THAT, AND ALL OF GRANDMA'S
FRIENDS ARE DYING OFF.Copy !req
72. MAID OF HONOR, BABY!Copy !req
73. - THANK YOU, SEÑOR.Copy !req
74. - REALLY, GLENN?Copy !req
75. - WHAT? WHEN YOU SEE A BAG
OF 100 BURRITOS FOR 12 BUCKS,Copy !req
76. YOU GOT TO BE A FOOL
NOT TO BUY 'EM.Copy !req
77. - THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE
TO EAT THEM ALL AT ONCE.Copy !req
78. - REALLY? THEN WHERE AM I
SUPPOSED TO KEEP 100 BURRITOS?Copy !req
79. COME ON, JACKIE,
THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK.Copy !req
80. - JUST BEHAVE YOURSELF
WHEN YOU MEET CURTIS.Copy !req
81. - OF COURSE I'M GONNA BEHAVE.Copy !req
82. I'M SO EXCITED.Copy !req
83. I'VE ALWAYS WANTED
A LITTLE STEPBROTHER,Copy !req
84. EVEN WHEN MY PARENTS
WERE STILL MARRIED.Copy !req
85. - I DIDN'T KNOW BERT
HAD A SON.Copy !req
86. - YEAH, HE DOESN'T TALK MUCH
ABOUT CURTIS.Copy !req
87. HE DROPPED OUT OF COLLEGE.
HE DOESN'T HAVE A JOB.Copy !req
88. I THINK BERT'S A LITTLE ASHAMED.Copy !req
89. - PARENTS CAN BE ASHAMED
OF THEIR KIDS?Copy !req
90. - ARE YOU KIDDING?
ABSOLUTELY.Copy !req
91. - HUH.Copy !req
92. - WHEN YOU'RE AROUND CURTIS,Copy !req
93. TRY NOT TO FLAUNT
OUR WEALTH AND SUCCESS.Copy !req
94. AND BY "OURS,"
I MEAN MINE.Copy !req
95. NOW, KIDS, IF GRANDMA'S GOT
SHARP TEETH AND BIG EARS,Copy !req
96. DON'T BE ALARMED.Copy !req
97. SHE'S JUST GETTING OLD.Copy !req
98. GRANDMA!Copy !req
99. - KIDS.Copy !req
100. - MOMMY.Copy !req
101. - THERE'S MY DOODLEBUG,Copy !req
102. HEAVEN'S LITTLE ANGELCopy !req
103. DELIVERED TO ME
IN THE FORM OF A BOY.Copy !req
104. JACKIE, YOU LOOK...Copy !req
105. ALIVE.Copy !req
106. - AROUND HERE,
THAT'S A HUGE COMPLIMENT.Copy !req
107. SHEILA, GIVE ME A HUG.Copy !req
108. OH, THIS FEELS SO RIGHT.Copy !req
109. - I'M GLAD YOU THINK IT DOES.Copy !req
110. - HI, GRANDPA BERT.Copy !req
111. - SOUNDS LIKE WE'VE GOT
SOME MARTINS IN THE HOUSE.Copy !req
112. - MARTINS IN THE HOUSE
SAY, "HEY-EY."Copy !req
113. - I SEE YOU PUT DAD'S
OLD ARTWORK UP.Copy !req
114. - HE'S A VERY GIFTED
MACARONI ARTIST.Copy !req
115. AND THESE ARE JUST
THE PIECES HE DIDN'T EAT.Copy !req
116. - WOW.
YOU IN THE TUB WITH YOUR MOTHER.Copy !req
117. EDIBLE AND OEDIPAL.Copy !req
118. - IT'S BASED ON
A RECURRING DREAM OF MINE.Copy !req
119. - WHOO-HOO.Copy !req
120. THIS IS A GREAT GIFT, GLENN.Copy !req
121. - MY PLEASURE.Copy !req
122. IT'S THE LEAST I COULD DO BEING
THE CENTER OF MOM'S UNIVERSECopy !req
123. AND NOW THE CENTER
OF YOUR UNIVERSE AS WELL.Copy !req
124. BECAUSE I'M THE SON.
GET IT?Copy !req
125. - THE SUN IS THE CENTER
OF THE SOLAR SYSTEM, GLENN,Copy !req
126. NOT THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE.Copy !req
127. - WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN?Copy !req
128. BOY, YOU MISS ONE USA TODAY.Copy !req
129. SO WHERE'S CURTIS?Copy !req
130. - WHO KNOWS?Copy !req
131. HE'S ALWAYS LATE.Copy !req
132. DAMN FOOL HAS A CLOCK
AROUND HIS NECKCopy !req
133. BUT NEVER KNOWS
WHAT TIME IT IS.Copy !req
134. - MAYBE IT'S GOOD I'M AROUND.Copy !req
135. SOUNDS LIKE HE NEEDS
A BIG BROTHERCopy !req
136. TO KEEP HIM ON
THE STRAIGHT AND NARROW.Copy !req
137. - OH, GLENN, THAT WOULD BE THE
GREATEST WEDDING GIFT OF ALL.Copy !req
138. BUT I STILL GET
TO KEEP THE GOLF CART.Copy !req
139. - WHAT'S THAT VIOLENT RUMBLING?Copy !req
140. - WELL, I DON'T THINK
IT'S THE BURRITOS.Copy !req
141. - HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON,
EVERYBODY?Copy !req
142. - WHO'S THIS HANDSOME
WELL-TO-DO MANCopy !req
143. FROM THE FUTURE?Copy !req
144. - THAT'S CURTIS, MY SON.Copy !req
145. - YOU MUST BE DR. GLENN.Copy !req
146. WHAT'S HAPPENING, BRO?Copy !req
147. - OH, YOU'RE CALLING ME "BRO"
BECAUSE IT'S A TERM OF AFFECTIONCopy !req
148. IN THE
AFRICAN AMERICAN COMMUNITY.Copy !req
149. - NO, BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING
TO BE MY BROTHER.Copy !req
150. - OH. I GUESS I'VE NEVER
HEARD IT USED THAT WAY.Copy !req
151. - WHOA, YOU MUST BE RICH.Copy !req
152. - YEAH, YOU DON'T SEEM LIKE
THE HOPELESS COLLEGE DROPOUTCopy !req
153. THAT DR. MARTIN WAS GONNA SEND
TO REFRIGERATOR REPAIR SCHOOL.Copy !req
154. - WELL, I WENT M.I.A.
FROM M.I.T.Copy !req
155. AFTER MY SOFTWARE COMPANY
WENT IPO.Copy !req
156. OMG.Copy !req
157. - I'M SO RICH, I'VE BEEN ON
THE COVER OF JET AND JET PACK.Copy !req
158. - WELL, I HAVEN'T BEEN
IN JET PACK,Copy !req
159. BUT I'VE BEEN IN "VAL PACK."Copy !req
160. VERY POPULAR COUPON.Copy !req
161. IT ALMOST PAID FOR ITSELF.Copy !req
162. - I AM SO PROUD
OF MY LITTLE DOODLEBUG.Copy !req
163. LET ME GIVE YOU A KISS.Copy !req
164. - WELL, IF YOU INSIST.Copy !req
165. - COOL.Copy !req
166. I'VE NEVER PRESSED
A BUTTON MARKED "DANGER."Copy !req
167. WHOA!Copy !req
168. HELP!Copy !req
169. I'M DYING!Copy !req
170. - WOW. THAT CURTIS REALLY KNOWS
HOW TO THROW A REHEARSAL DINNER.Copy !req
171. - NAKED SUSHI.Copy !req
172. WELL, I'M NOT IMPRESSED.Copy !req
173. OH.Copy !req
174. - COME ON, THIS IS
EVERYTHING YOU LIKE—Copy !req
175. FONDUE BAR,
BOTTOMLESS SALAD BOWL.Copy !req
176. - GET OVER HERE,
YOU STUBBORN CROUTON.Copy !req
177. WHOA!Copy !req
178. - HANG ON, UNCLE DEXTER.
I'LL SAVE YOU.Copy !req
179. - THANK YOU, CONOR.Copy !req
180. BY THE WAY,
I LIKE YOUR AFRO.Copy !req
181. THOSE CURLS ARE TIGHT.Copy !req
182. - THANKS.Copy !req
183. MY SISTER SAYS
IT ACTS LIKE A HELMETCopy !req
184. THAT PREVENTS THOUGHTS
FROM GETTING IN.Copy !req
185. - SHE CALLED HIM DOODLEBUG,
JACKIE.Copy !req
186. WHY MY NAME?Copy !req
187. THERE ARE PLENTY OF OTHER
CUTE BUG NAMES OUT THERE.Copy !req
188. JITTER BUG, LOVE BUG,
TWEETLE-BEETLE-BATTLE BUG.Copy !req
189. - I KNOW IT'S HARD.Copy !req
190. YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN
THE CENTER OF YOUR MOM'S WORLD.Copy !req
191. THIS MIGHT HAVE CAUSED YOUCopy !req
192. TO BE SOMEWHAT
OF A BIG, FAT MAMA'S BOY.Copy !req
193. BUT YOU'RE NOT LOSING
YOUR MOTHER.Copy !req
194. YOU'RE GAINING A BROTHER,Copy !req
195. A HANDSOME, RICH,
HARD-BODIED BROTHER.Copy !req
196. - WHEN YOU DESCRIBE HIM
LIKE THAT,Copy !req
197. HE'S PRACTICALLY MY TWIN.Copy !req
198. THANKS, JACKIE.Copy !req
199. CURTIS, I HAVE A CONFESSION.Copy !req
200. WHEN MY MOM CALLED YOU
DOODLEBUG,Copy !req
201. I FELT THREATENED.Copy !req
202. BUT MAYBE IN THIS BLENDEDCopy !req
203. VANILLA MOCHA
FAMILY-CHINO OF OURS,Copy !req
204. THERE IS ROOM
FOR TWO DOODLEBUGS.Copy !req
205. - AW, GLENN, I APPRECIATE THAT.Copy !req
206. UNFORTUNATELY, THERE IS ONE
THING YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT.Copy !req
207. - OH, REALLY?
WHAT'S THAT?Copy !req
208. - THERE'S ONLY ROOM
FOR ONE DOODLEBUG,Copy !req
209. AND HE AIN'T THE ONE
WITH THE HAIRBRUSH ON HIS RV.Copy !req
210. - WHOA!Copy !req
211. WHOA!Copy !req
212. - HEY, GLENN,
THROW ME UP SOME CROUTONS.Copy !req
213. I'M STILL FALLING!Copy !req
214. 200 MORE BEFORE
I CAN FIT IN THAT DRESS.Copy !req
215. BUT THE PAIN IS WORTH IT TO BE
IN YOUR MOTHER'S GOOD GRACES.Copy !req
216. AH!Copy !req
217. - HE'S TRYING TO FORCE ME
OUT OF THE FAMILY, JACKIE.Copy !req
218. BLACK MAN TRYING
TO PUSH THE WHITE MAN OUT.Copy !req
219. IT'S THE STORY OF ROCK AND ROLL
ALL OVER AGAIN.Copy !req
220. - GLENN, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.Copy !req
221. HE'S PROBABLY JUST JOKING.Copy !req
222. CURTIS IS VERY FUNNY.Copy !req
223. HA, OH, ADD THAT TO THE LISTCopy !req
224. OF QUALITIES THAT I ADMIRE
ABOUT HIM.Copy !req
225. - OH, FINE.Copy !req
226. HE'S ALSO TRYING TO STEAL
THE WORD "DOODLEBUG" FROM ME.Copy !req
227. NEXT HE'S GONNA STEAL
THE OTHER WORDS I MADE UP,Copy !req
228. LIKE "DANG HOOZIT" AND
"WILMER VALDERRAMA."Copy !req
229. THAT CURTIS THINKS
HE CAN STEAL MY WOMAN?Copy !req
230. I PUT UP A FIGHT FOR MY WOMAN.Copy !req
231. - DON'T YOU THINK
YOUR RELATIONSHIPCopy !req
232. WITH YOUR MOTHER
IS A LITTLE INAPPROPRIATE?Copy !req
233. - WHY?
BECAUSE OF THE AGE DIFFERENCE?Copy !req
234. - KNOCKIE-KNOCKIE.Copy !req
235. IS EVERYONE DECENT?Copy !req
236. - UH, MORE THAN DECENT.Copy !req
237. CHECK OUT MY BRIDESMAID DRESS.Copy !req
238. - PLEASE DON'T TELL ME
YOU BOUGHT A DRESS.Copy !req
239. - I DID, BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT YOU
TOLD ME TO DO IN THAT EMAIL.Copy !req
240. - OH, I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW
THAT TECHNOLOGY WORKS.Copy !req
241. YOU'RE GOING TO WEAR THIS
AT THE WEDDING.Copy !req
242. NOW I GET IT.Copy !req
243. SHE'S TRYING TO MAKE ME
LOOK LIKE A FOOL.Copy !req
244. WELL, NO ONE MAKES
JACKIE MARTIN LOOK LIKE A FOOL!Copy !req
245. - MOM, IT'S THE DAY
BEFORE YOUR WEDDING.Copy !req
246. YOU SHOULDN'T EXERT YOURSELF.Copy !req
247. LET ME HELP YOU WITH THAT.Copy !req
248. - OH, GLENN, YOU DON'T HAVE
THE UPPER BODY STRENGTHCopy !req
249. TO STIR COOKIE DOUGH.Copy !req
250. MOVE OVER, ROVER.
LET CURTIS TAKE OVER.Copy !req
251. YOU'RE GOING DOWN, SUCKER.Copy !req
252. - IF BY DOWN YOU MEAN UPCopy !req
253. AND BY SUCKER
YOU MEAN AMERICAN HERO,Copy !req
254. THEN I GUESS I AGREE WITH YOU.Copy !req
255. - SO WHO WANTS
TO LICK THE SPOON?Copy !req
256. - I DO.
- I DO TOO.Copy !req
257. - BUT YOU'RE GONNA HAVE
TO SHARE.Copy !req
258. - I CAN TASTE VICTORY.Copy !req
259. - THAT MIGHT BE THE FALAFEL
I HAD THIS MORNING.Copy !req
260. - MOVE IT, PEOPLE.Copy !req
261. WE HAVE 24 HOURS
TILL BRIDE KICKOFF.Copy !req
262. AND WHY IS THE TIDE COMING IN?Copy !req
263. I SAID NO WAVES.Copy !req
264. - WOW, WHEN I SEE THAT WOMAN
BARK ORDERS INTO THAT HEADSET,Copy !req
265. I SEE NOTHING BUT POWER.Copy !req
266. - YEAH, UNMARRIED AND DESPERATE
FALL TO THE WAYSIDE.Copy !req
267. - TIME FOR CENTERPIECE APPROVAL.Copy !req
268. THESE AREN'T ROSES.
THESE ARE—Copy !req
269. PETUNIAS FROM
MY GRANDMOTHER'S GARDEN.Copy !req
270. KENNETH?Copy !req
271. - YOU ONLY HAVE ONE MORE WEDDING
TO PLAN, MELISSA.Copy !req
272. YOUR OWN.Copy !req
273. - I KNEW CATCHING YOU IN BED
WITH MY BEST FRIENDCopy !req
274. WAS JUST A COMIC
MISUNDERSTANDING.Copy !req
275. - YEAH, RIGHT,
COMIC MISUNDERSTANDING.Copy !req
276. - OH, MY GOD,
YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?Copy !req
277. WE'RE THE WEDDING PLANNERS NOW.Copy !req
278. - I DON'T THINK
THAT'S HOW IT WORKS.Copy !req
279. - EXCUSE ME, LADIES.Copy !req
280. I HAVE THE CENTERPIECES
FOR APPROVAL.Copy !req
281. - OH, I THINK YOU
HAVE US MISTAKEN.Copy !req
282. WE'RE NOT—Copy !req
283. - SIGNING OFF ON THIS.Copy !req
284. WE WANT ORCHIDS.Copy !req
285. - BUT I HAVE 200 OF THESE.Copy !req
286. - YOU'RE GONNA EAT IT.Copy !req
287. - SIR, THAT WAS
A FIGURE OF SPEECH.Copy !req
288. YOU DON'T HAVE TO EAT IT.Copy !req
289. - OKAY, GIRLS,
TAKE THE HEADSETS OFF.Copy !req
290. PEOPLE HAVE JOBS TO DO.Copy !req
291. OBVIOUSLY THIS MAN
HAS A LOT OF FLOWERS TO EAT.Copy !req
292. - OH, LOOK AT THE GIRLS.Copy !req
293. IT'S LIKE LOOKING
AT FULL SIZE WEDDING PLANNERSCopy !req
294. FROM AN AIRPLANE.Copy !req
295. - CAN WE DO IT, DAD?Copy !req
296. CAN WE BE THE WEDDING PLANNERS?Copy !req
297. - I DON'T THINK SO, GIRLS.Copy !req
298. THAT'S A LOT OF RESPONSIBILITY.Copy !req
299. - NOT TO SNIP OFF
YOUR DADDY'S CHANGE PURSE,Copy !req
300. BUT HIS OPINION MEANS NOTHING.Copy !req
301. YOU'RE HIRED.Copy !req
302. - THANKS, UNCLE CURTIS.Copy !req
303. - NOW, SPEND MY MONEY WISELY
OR UNWISELY.Copy !req
304. DOESN'T MATTER.Copy !req
305. UNLIKE MC HAMMER,
I'LL NEVER RUN OUT OF MONEY.Copy !req
306. - EH...Copy !req
307. - CAN'T TOUCH THAT.Copy !req
308. - MY WEDDING GIFT
JUST CAME IN.Copy !req
309. DADDY, MAMA,
YOU'LL BE STYLING IN THIS.Copy !req
310. - OH, CURTIS, I LOVE IT.Copy !req
311. IT'S SO FUNKY FRESH.Copy !req
312. - OH, THAT'S TOO MUCH CAR
FOR ME.Copy !req
313. THIS IS MORE MY SPEED.Copy !req
314. - OH, I HOPE BERT
DIDN'T HURT CURT.Copy !req
315. - THAT'S JUST THE SIZZLE.Copy !req
316. WAIT FOR THE STEAK.Copy !req
317. - THAT ACTUALLY MIGHT BE
MY SPEED.Copy !req
318. - WHOA-OH!Copy !req
319. splash!Copy !req
320. OH.Copy !req
321. THIS WAR JUST GOT
A WHOLE LOT WARRIER.Copy !req
322. - I'M BORED.Copy !req
323. I WANT TO PLAY
WEDDING PLANNER TOO.Copy !req
324. - IT'S NOT A GAME.Copy !req
325. THIS IS AN ADULT JOB
WITH ADULT RESPONSIBILITIES.Copy !req
326. - BUT I AM ADULT.Copy !req
327. JUST THIS MORNING YOU SAID I WAS
THE BIGGEST DOLT YOU EVER MET.Copy !req
328. - UGH, IT WOULD BE EASIER
TO JUST GIVE HIM A JOBCopy !req
329. THAN TO EXPLAIN
WHAT A HOMONYM IS.Copy !req
330. - FINE, THERE MUST BE SOMETHING
THAT'S SO IDIOT-PROOFCopy !req
331. EVEN HE CAN HANDLE IT.Copy !req
332. I KNOW, CONOR, YOU CAN KEEP
YOUR EYE ON THE WEDDING DOVES.Copy !req
333. - COOL.Copy !req
334. - COME ON, WENDY.Copy !req
335. WE HAVE TO KEEP UNCLE DEXTER
AWAY FROM THE CROUTONS.Copy !req
336. - UH-OH.Copy !req
337. WE'RE OUT OF BIRD SEED.Copy !req
338. PROBLEM?Copy !req
339. SOLUTION.Copy !req
340. GOLF CART.Copy !req
341. JET PACK.Copy !req
342. - MOMMY, WHERE ARE YOU?Copy !req
343. I'M HUNGRY.Copy !req
344. - IN HERE, DOODLEBUG.Copy !req
345. - BAH!Copy !req
346. - WHAT'S HAPPENING, BRO?Copy !req
347. - UH, UH, UH.Copy !req
348. MAMA!Copy !req
349. AH!Copy !req
350. - EH, WHAT—WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
351. - THE ANSWER JUST HIT ME,
LITERALLY.Copy !req
352. I CAN'T COMPETE WITH CURTIS
ON A FINANCIAL LEVEL,Copy !req
353. BUT I CAN BEAT HIM
ON AN EMOTIONAL LEVEL.Copy !req
354. MY PRICELESS ARTWORK.Copy !req
355. - THAT MACARONI CRAP?Copy !req
356. WELL, YOUR MOM DOES SEEM
TO LIKE IT FOR SOME REASON.Copy !req
357. I JUST THOUGHT SHE
WAS STOCKPILING PASTACopy !req
358. FOR THE RAPTURE.Copy !req
359. - ALL I HAVE TO DO IS CREATE
THE FINEST PIECE OF ARTCopy !req
360. THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN.Copy !req
361. THEN MOMMY'S MINE
AND MINE ALONE.Copy !req
362. - HMM.Copy !req
363. THAT GIVES ME AN IDEA.Copy !req
364. - HOO.Copy !req
365. - BRAVA, JACKIE MARTIN.Copy !req
366. NO ONE'S GOING
TO LOOK AT THE BRIDE NOW.Copy !req
367. - WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
TO MY DRESS?Copy !req
368. - LET'S BE HONEST.Copy !req
369. YOU ONLY GAVE ME
THIS GUNNY SACKCopy !req
370. TO EMBARRASS ME AT THE WEDDING,Copy !req
371. BECAUSE I'M HOTTER
THAN YOU WILL EVER BECopy !req
372. AND YOUR SON PREFERS MY BED
TO YOURS.Copy !req
373. - THAT WAS
MY GRANDMOTHER'S DRESS.Copy !req
374. I CHOSE IT SPECIFICALLY BECAUSE,
DESPITE OUR DIFFERENCES,Copy !req
375. I'VE ALWAYS ADMIRED
YOUR DIGNITY AND SELFLESSNESS.Copy !req
376. - OH.Copy !req
377. HEY, WHY DON'T WE PRETEND I
DIDN'T SAY THOSE AWFUL THINGS?Copy !req
378. - YOU DESTROYED MY ONLY MEMENTO
OF GRANDMA DEBORAH.Copy !req
379. YOU'RE NO LONGER
MY MAID OF HONOR.Copy !req
380. - IF YOU INSIST ON COMING
TO THE WEDDING,Copy !req
381. I'D PREFER YOU SIT
ON THE GROOM'S SIDECopy !req
382. AND PAY FOR YOUR OWN DRINKS.Copy !req
383. - DO I GET A CHOICE OF ENTREE?Copy !req
384. - KOSHER VEGETARIAN.Copy !req
385. - OOH, SHE REALLY DOES HATE ME.Copy !req
386. - IT'S MAGNIFICENT.Copy !req
387. OH, GOD, IT'S HORRIBLE.Copy !req
388. - WELL, WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE,
SWEATER VEST?Copy !req
389. - JUST GO AWAY, CURTIS.
YOU WON, ALL RIGHT?Copy !req
390. IT'S OVER.Copy !req
391. - COME ON, BABY.Copy !req
392. GIVE CURTIS THE COURTESY
OF A LOOK-SEE.Copy !req
393. TOO SLOW, JOE.Copy !req
394. NOT QUICK, MINT.Copy !req
395. NICE TRY, GLENN FRY.Copy !req
396. AH!Copy !req
397. - OOPS.Copy !req
398. - WHAT IS GOING ON HERE, BOYS?Copy !req
399. - CURTIS, DID YOU JUST DESTROY
GLENN'S ARTWORK?Copy !req
400. THE BOY WORKED
VERY HARD ON THAT.Copy !req
401. - UH, YEAH.Copy !req
402. IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL MASTERPIECE
THAT I MADE FOR YOU AND MOTHER.Copy !req
403. IT WAS FROM MY HEART!Copy !req
404. - BUT DADDY—
- I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS.Copy !req
405. EVER SINCE YOU GOT HERE,Copy !req
406. YOU BEEN PICKING
ON THIS POOR, HELPLESS SCHLUB.Copy !req
407. - WELL, I WOULDN'T SAY "FAT,"Copy !req
408. BUT I AM UPSET,
VERY, VERY UPSET.Copy !req
409. - THAT'S IT, CURTIS.Copy !req
410. YOU'RE DISINVITED
FROM THE WEDDING.Copy !req
411. - OOH.Copy !req
412. - AW.Copy !req
413. - WELL, WELL, IT SEEMS THERE'S
ONLY ONE DOODLEBUG AFTER ALL.Copy !req
414. - BEST MAN'S GOT
TO LOOK THE BEST,Copy !req
415. AND JACKIE SAID I'D NEVER
WEAR THIS MORE THAN ONCE.Copy !req
416. UGH, HANTAVIRUS.Copy !req
417. - I CAN'T BELIEVE I GOT KICKED
OUT OF THE WEDDING PARTY.Copy !req
418. - I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU HAVE
TO PAY FOR DRINKS,Copy !req
419. ESPECIALLY KNOWING
HOW MUCH YOU DRINK AT WEDDINGS.Copy !req
420. - WELL, NO ONE'S GOT IT WORSE
THAN POOR CURTIS,Copy !req
421. BANNED FROM HIS
OWN FATHER'S WEDDING.Copy !req
422. - I KNOW.
I FEEL FOR THE GUY.Copy !req
423. - REALLY? IS THAT WHY
YOU'RE DANCING?Copy !req
424. - HEY, I CAN'T TELL MY FEET
HOW TO FEEL.Copy !req
425. THAT'S BETWEEN THEM
AND THE IMAGINARY MUSIC.Copy !req
426. - FLOWER ARRANGEMENTS?Copy !req
427. - CHECK.
- CARVING STATION?Copy !req
428. - CHECK.
- ETHNICITY OF PASTRY CHEF?Copy !req
429. - SLOVENIAN.Copy !req
430. - THAT'S A SHAME.Copy !req
431. WOULD HAVE WORKED BETTER
IF YOU SAID CZECH.Copy !req
432. WE'RE REALLY DOING IT, WENDY.Copy !req
433. WE'RE ACTUALLY PULLING OFF
OUR FIRST REAL ADULT JOB.Copy !req
434. - I KNOW. IT'S GREAT.Copy !req
435. - COME ON. FLY.Copy !req
436. YOU CAN DO IT.Copy !req
437. OH.Copy !req
438. - CONOR, WHAT DID YOU DO?Copy !req
439. - NOTHING; DEFINITELY DID NOT
FEED THEM RICE.Copy !req
440. BECAUSE AS I'VE SINCE LEARNED
ON THE INTERNET,Copy !req
441. RICE MIXED WITH WATER
CAUSES SEVERE BLOATING.Copy !req
442. splat!Copy !req
443. - OKAY, YOU'RE FIRED.Copy !req
444. - BUT RICE DOESN'T DO THAT.Copy !req
445. I'LL PROVE IT.Copy !req
446. PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION.Copy !req
447. - OH, NO, THIS IS NOT GOOD.Copy !req
448. I THINK I'M GETTING COLD FEET.Copy !req
449. - YOU DON'T WANT
TO GO THROUGH WITH THE WEDDING?Copy !req
450. - NO, I MEAN MY FEET ARE COLD.Copy !req
451. I BETTER PUT
ON MY CIRCULATION HOSE.Copy !req
452. - LISTEN, GLENN.Copy !req
453. I WANT TO APOLOGIZE
FOR CURTIS'S BEHAVIOR,Copy !req
454. BURNING YOUR ARTWORK LIKE THAT.Copy !req
455. - THANK YOU, UNCLE DEXTER.Copy !req
456. IT'S VERY KIND OF YOU
TO CALL IT ARTWORK.Copy !req
457. I MEAN, I'M STILL TRYING TO GET
OVER THE TRAUMA OF IT ALL.Copy !req
458. - FACT IS, THAT BOY'S BEEN
JEALOUS OF YOUCopy !req
459. SINCE THE GET-GO.Copy !req
460. - JEALOUS OF ME?Copy !req
461. - OH, YEAH.Copy !req
462. BERT'S ALWAYS BEEN TOUGH
ON CURTIS.Copy !req
463. THEN ALONG COMES SHEILA,Copy !req
464. AND SHE COULDN'T BE MORE LOVING
AND ACCEPTING OF HIM.Copy !req
465. JUST WHAT HE NEEDED.Copy !req
466. ONLY PROBLEM IS, SHE'S ALREADY
GOT THE PERFECT SON.Copy !req
467. MY MOM HAS ANOTHER SON?Copy !req
468. WHERE IS HE? I'LL KILL HIM.Copy !req
469. - I'M TALKING ABOUT YOU, GLENN.Copy !req
470. RESPONSIBLE, LOVING FAMILY,
ALWAYS WEARS A TIE—Copy !req
471. ALL THE QUALITIES
BERT WISHES FOR CURTIS.Copy !req
472. PERSONALLY, I THINK CURTIS THREW
THIS WHOLE WEEKENDCopy !req
473. JUST TO IMPRESS YOU.Copy !req
474. - WOW.Copy !req
475. CURTIS IS ACTUALLY
JEALOUS OF ME.Copy !req
476. I WIN!Copy !req
477. - GROOMSMEN, GO.Copy !req
478. I SAID GO.Copy !req
479. DON'T RUIN MY SPECIAL DAY.Copy !req
480. UP TOP.Copy !req
481. - WHO'S THAT?Copy !req
482. - THAT'S GUADALUPE,
THE WAITRESS.Copy !req
483. WHY IS SHE THE MAID OF HONOR?Copy !req
484. AND DOES THAT MEAN I'M NOT
GETTING MY GRENADINE AND SODA?Copy !req
485. - DEARLY BELOVEDCopy !req
486. AND ANY MUSIC PRODUCER OUT THERECopy !req
487. WANT TO GIVE A BROTHER
A SECOND CHANCE,Copy !req
488. WE ARE HERE TO CELEBRATE
THE JOINING OF BERT AND SHEILACopy !req
489. AND THE BLENDING
OF THEIR TWO POSSES.Copy !req
490. THEY ARE TWO LEGITIMATE
TO QUIT-IMATE.Copy !req
491. - I OBJECT.Copy !req
492. - DOODLEBUG,
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
493. - OBJECTION OVERRULED.Copy !req
494. PARACHUTE PANTS,
BREAK IT DOWN.Copy !req
495. - MOM, BERT, I COULD NOT
BE HAPPIER FOR YOU.Copy !req
496. BUT YOU HAVE TWO DOODLEBUGS,
AND ONE OF THEM ISN'T HERE.Copy !req
497. EVERYONE KNOWS YOU CAN'T HAVE
A WEDDINGCopy !req
498. WITH JUST ONE DOODLEBUG.Copy !req
499. - WOULD EVERYONE STOP SAYING
"DOODLEBUG?"Copy !req
500. "DOODLEBUG" IS NOT A WORD.Copy !req
501. THIS IS RIDICULOUS,
BORDERING ON RIDONCULOUS.Copy !req
502. - I'M SORRY, BERT,Copy !req
503. BUT IF YOU GO THROUGH WITH THIS
WITHOUT YOUR SON,Copy !req
504. YOU'LL ALWAYS REGRET IT.Copy !req
505. AND TO ME, THAT'S THE DEFINITION
OF RIDONCULOUS.Copy !req
506. - GLENN, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?Copy !req
507. - I'M GOING TO GET
MY LITTLE BROTHER BACK.Copy !req
508. ANY IDEA WHERE HE MIGHT BE?Copy !req
509. BECAUSE I KNOW PRACTICALLY
NOTHING ABOUT HIM.Copy !req
510. - WHENEVER HE GETS UPSET,
HE PLAYS WITH HIS TRAIN SET.Copy !req
511. - YIKES, BERT,
THAT'S A LITTLE PERSONAL.Copy !req
512. OH, I THOUGHT YOU MEANT...Copy !req
513. NEVER MIND.Copy !req
514. WHOA, WHOA! HEY!Copy !req
515. WHOA!Copy !req
516. HEY, WAIT UP!Copy !req
517. CURTIS, WAIT.Copy !req
518. - WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?Copy !req
519. THAT'S MY JET PACK.Copy !req
520. AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED
TO BE THE BEST MANCopy !req
521. IN SOMEBODY'S WEDDING?Copy !req
522. - YEAH, YOUR DAD'S WEDDING.Copy !req
523. WOW.
YOU HAVE A TERRIBLE MEMORY.Copy !req
524. WHOA!Copy !req
525. smack!Copy !req
526. - GLENN, IS THERE
A REASON YOU'RE HERE?Copy !req
527. - CURTIS, I SCREWED UP,Copy !req
528. AND I WANT YOU TO COME BACK
TO THE WEDDING WITH ME.Copy !req
529. - MAN, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT.Copy !req
530. - PLEASE, JUST GIVE ME
ONE MORE CHANCE.Copy !req
531. clang!Copy !req
532. - FORGET IT.Copy !req
533. - CURTIS, HEAR THE LAD OUT.Copy !req
534. - YEAH, HE LOVES YOU.Copy !req
535. GET BACK TO THAT WEDDING
AND MARRY HIM.Copy !req
536. - MARRY HIM?
GET THE WOMP OFF MY TRAIN.Copy !req
537. - NO, CURTIS,
I WON'T GIVE UP ON YOU.Copy !req
538. I WON'T GIVE UP ON US.Copy !req
539. - GIVE ME ONE GOOD REASON
WHY I SHOULD GO BACK.Copy !req
540. - BECAUSE I'M MISERABLE
WITHOUT YOU.Copy !req
541. CURTIS "MIDDLE NAME, LAST NAME,"Copy !req
542. WOULD YOU DO ME THE HONOR
OF BECOMING MY STEP BROTHER?Copy !req
543. - OH, WHAT THE HELL.
LET'S DO IT.Copy !req
544. - YEAH, ATTABOY.Copy !req
545. - MY DOODLEBUGS.Copy !req
546. - SON, HOW WOULD YOU LIKE
TO BE MY CO-BEST MAN?Copy !req
547. - I'D LOVE TO, POPS.Copy !req
548. - CONOR, HOW'D YOU LIKE
TO HAVE YOUR OLD JOB BACK?Copy !req
549. - I'D LOVE TO, POPS.Copy !req
550. - JACKIE, I'M SORRY
FOR GETTING ANGRY AT YOUCopy !req
551. FOR DESTROYING
THE ONLY MEMORY I HADCopy !req
552. OF A BELOVED RELATIVE.Copy !req
553. - I KNOW.
IT WASN'T YOUR FINEST MOMENT.Copy !req
554. - AND I WANT YOU BACK
AS MY MAID OF HONOR,Copy !req
555. WITH ONE SMALL REQUEST.Copy !req
556. - YOU MAY NOW KISS THE BRIDE.Copy !req
557. SLOBBER TIME.Copy !req
558. - CUE BIRD MAN.Copy !req
559. - FLY, DOVES, BE FREE.Copy !req
560. - WELL, JACKIE, LOOKS LIKE
THIS WEDDINGCopy !req
561. WENT OFF WITHOUT A HITCH
AFTER ALL.Copy !req
562. - LOOK OUT!Copy !req
563. - RUN!Copy !req