1. - THAT'S ME, GLENN MARTIN,
FATHER, DENTIST, HOMBRE,Copy !req
2. BUT MOSTLY FATHER
AND DENTIST.Copy !req
3. I TOOK MY FAMILY ON A ROAD TRIP
SO WE CAN GROW CLOSER.Copy !req
4. WELL, THAT, AND I BURNED
THE HOUSE DOWN.Copy !req
5. SO IT'S ME,
MY WIFE, JACKIE—Copy !req
6. SHE'S THE SWEETEST—
OH!Copy !req
7. OUR SON, CONOR;
HE'S UNIQUE,Copy !req
8. HIS SISTER, COURTNEY—Copy !req
9. WE'LL ALL BE WORKING
FOR HER ONE DAY.Copy !req
10. IN FACT, HER ASSISTANT WENDY
ALREADY IS.Copy !req
11. AND THERE'S CANINE.Copy !req
12. HE'LL BE STICKIN' AROUND.Copy !req
13. WANT TO HEAR US WHISTLE?Copy !req
14. - AH, SAN FRANCISCO:Copy !req
15. A CHARMING LITTLE SUBURB
OF LOS ANGELES.Copy !req
16. - THIS CITY'S JUST SO
WONDERFULLY LIBERAL.Copy !req
17. A POUND OF CHERRIES,
SIR OR MADAM.Copy !req
18. - THEY'RE NOT CHERRIES.Copy !req
19. THEY'RE ORGANIC APPLES.Copy !req
20. - DELIGHTFUL!Copy !req
21. CAN I GET A PLASTIC BAG?Copy !req
22. - PLASTIC BAG?Copy !req
23. RAPE!
THE EARTH IS BEING RAPED!Copy !req
24. - THIS CITY IS SO ME.Copy !req
25. - YOU HAVE ANY IDEA
WHERE CONOR IS?Copy !req
26. NEAT SHOW,
MONKEY AND YOUR PET HUMAN.Copy !req
27. UGH!Copy !req
28. - WE'LL GIVE YOU GUYS A SHOW.Copy !req
29. - MAMA MIA!Copy !req
30. - HEY, CAN'T A MAN
GRIND HIS ORGAN IN PUBLICCopy !req
31. WITHOUT BEING HARASSED?Copy !req
32. - OH, LOOK.
IT'S A TALKING MONKEY.Copy !req
33. - TALKING MONKEY?Copy !req
34. WHERE?Copy !req
35. OH.Copy !req
36. - SAN FRANCISCO IS SO TOLERANT
AND FREE-SPIRITED.Copy !req
37. IT'S EVERYTHING I HATE.Copy !req
38. - YEAH, CAN WE GO TO THE MINT
ALREADY?Copy !req
39. - NO, WE WENT TO THAT
BORING MINT IN PHILADELPHIA.Copy !req
40. I CAN'T HANDLE
ANOTHER THREE HOURSCopy !req
41. OF, "SORRY,
NO FREE SAMPLES" JOKES.Copy !req
42. - BORING?Copy !req
43. THAT IS AN OFFENSE
TO OUR RELIGIOUS BELIEFS.Copy !req
44. - BECAUSE WE WERE WORSHIP
THE ALMIGHTY DOLLAR.Copy !req
45. - RELIGIOUS PERSECUTION!Copy !req
46. - ASSAULT!Copy !req
47. THE FREEDOM TO WORSHIP
HAS BEEN ASSAULTED!Copy !req
48. - HEY, LOOK AT CONOR.Copy !req
49. HE'S WEARING THE CUTEST
LITTLE PILLBOX HATCopy !req
50. AND PLAYING HIS CYMBALS LIKE A—Copy !req
51. OH, BOY.Copy !req
52. - FOLLOW OUR TWITTER TO SEE
WHERE WE'LL BE MUGGING NEXT.Copy !req
53. PEACE.Copy !req
54. - CONOR, SAY SOMETHING SO I KNOW
YOU'RE NOT TRAUMATIZED.Copy !req
55. - CHECK IT OUT, KIDS.
LOMBARD STREET.Copy !req
56. MORE TWISTS AND TURNS
THAN THE FINALE OF LOST.Copy !req
57. - AND IF ONLY I'D GOTTEN THERE
EARLIER.Copy !req
58. I WOULD HAVE KNOCKED SOME SENSE
INTO THOSE PUNKS,Copy !req
59. JUST LIKE HOW I BEAT UP
THAT FLOWER VENDERCopy !req
60. ON GRAND THEFT AUTO.Copy !req
61. - WHOA, GLENN, HOLD ON.Copy !req
62. - NO, I WILL NOT HOLD ON.Copy !req
63. CONOR LOOKS UP TO ME
AS HIS PROTECTOR,Copy !req
64. AND I FAILED HIM.Copy !req
65. - NO, HOLD ON,Copy !req
66. BECAUSE WE'RE ABOUT TO CRASH
THROUGH THAT GUARD RAIL.Copy !req
67. - IT'S TIME I TEACH MY SON
HOW TO DEFEND HIMSELF,Copy !req
68. SHOW HIM HOW TO REALLY SOCK 'EM
IN THE MOUTH.Copy !req
69. - OR MAYBE WE COULD HIRE
A PROFESSIONAL.Copy !req
70. - WHOA, WHOA.Copy !req
71. ARE YOU SAYING I'M NOT MAN
ENOUGH TO TEACH HIM MYSELF?Copy !req
72. - GLENN, YOU'VE HAD
THAT BAND-AID ON FOR A YEARCopy !req
73. BECAUSE YOU'RE AFRAID
TO PULL IT OFF.Copy !req
74. - SO I'M SENSITIVE TO PAIN.Copy !req
75. THAT'S WHAT MAKES ME
SUCH A GREAT SONGWRITER.Copy !req
76. NEVERTHELESS, I'M MORE THAN
CAPABLE OF TEACHING HIM MYSELF.Copy !req
77. - OKAY, SO LET ME JUST—Copy !req
78. - OKAY, I'LL TAKE HIM
TO THE PROFESSIONAL.Copy !req
79. JUST LET ME KEEP THE BAND-AID
ON FOR ANOTHER YEAR.Copy !req
80. - HEY, DAD.Copy !req
81. YOU THINK I CAN REALLY LEARN
HOW TO FIGHT HERE?Copy !req
82. - DON'T LET THE PAJAMAS
FOOL YOU.Copy !req
83. THE CHINESE ARE A TOUGH PEOPLE.Copy !req
84. THEY PUT MORE LEAD IN THEIR TOYS
THAN WE DO IN OUR BULLETS.Copy !req
85. - HA!Copy !req
86. - NEXT UP, GLENN-SAN
AND SON-SAN.Copy !req
87. - HERE WE GO.Copy !req
88. - FIRST STEP ON JOURNEY
TO MANHOOD...Copy !req
89. SIGN LIABILITY WAIVER.Copy !req
90. - OKEYDOKEY.Copy !req
91. PUT IN MOUTH GUARDS.Copy !req
92. - OH, WE DIDN'T BRING
MOUTH GUARDS.Copy !req
93. - NOT IMPORTANT.
YOU SIGN LIABILITY WAIVER.Copy !req
94. FIGHT!Copy !req
95. - YEAH, DON'T WORRY.
I'LL TAKE IT EASY ON—Copy !req
96. OW!
OW! OW! OW!Copy !req
97. STOP IT!
IT HURTS. COME ON.Copy !req
98. - I'M KUNG-FUING YOU!Copy !req
99. - LEG LOCK.Copy !req
100. - OH!Copy !req
101. - CRANE KICK.Copy !req
102. - HEY! OW!
STOP THAT! COME ON!Copy !req
103. - BEIJING POWER WEDGIE!Copy !req
104. - AND THEN
THE WHOLE THING RIPPED,Copy !req
105. AND EVERYONE STARTED LAUGHING.Copy !req
106. - YAY, CONOR!Copy !req
107. - ISN'T IT GREAT?Copy !req
108. I THOUGHT IT WOULD BOOST
THE BOY'S CONFIDENCE.Copy !req
109. - YOU CAN'T BEAT UP DAD.Copy !req
110. HE LET YOU WIN.Copy !req
111. - NO, CONOR BEAT ME
FAIR AND SQUARE.Copy !req
112. I DID LET HIM WIN,
BUT DON'T SAY ANYTHING.Copy !req
113. - DAD JUST SAID HE LET YOU WIN.Copy !req
114. - DAD!
IS THAT TRUE?Copy !req
115. - OF COURSE NOT.Copy !req
116. I'M SO MAD AT YOU.Copy !req
117. WHEN I WHISPER,
IT MEANS "DON'T TELL HIM."Copy !req
118. - SO YOU WANT US TO BELIEVE
THAT A 60-POUND BOYCopy !req
119. CAN BEAT UP A 400-POUND MAN?Copy !req
120. - THAT'S WHAT WE WANT YOU
TO BELIEVE.Copy !req
121. I AM NOT 400 POUNDS, EVEN IF
I HAVE GONE UP TWO JEAN SIZES.Copy !req
122. - MAYBE WE SHOULD HAVE
A REMATCH.Copy !req
123. - OH, I DON'T THINK—
- REMATCH!Copy !req
124. YAH!Copy !req
125. - OKAY, I GIVE UP.
I EAT POOP SANDWICHES!Copy !req
126. AH!Copy !req
127. - CONOR RICKY MARTIN,
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU.Copy !req
128. - AND THE OSCAR GOES
TO GLENN MARTIN.Copy !req
129. - DON'T EVEN TRY.Copy !req
130. - SO FOR EVERY NEW DOLLAR
PRINTED,Copy !req
131. AN OLD ONE IS DESTROYED.Copy !req
132. THIS IS THE BACKBONE OF...Copy !req
133. STABLE MONETARY POLICY.Copy !req
134. - CALM DOWN.Copy !req
135. - HE'S LIKE THE PERFECT CROSSCopy !req
136. OF WARREN BUFFETT
AND WARREN CHRISTOPHER.Copy !req
137. - I WANT TO BE MARRIED HERE.Copy !req
138. - I WANT TO BE BURIED HERE.Copy !req
139. - I WANT TO BE MURDERED HERE.Copy !req
140. - FINE.Copy !req
141. WE'LL JUST GO TO THE GIFT SHOPCopy !req
142. SO WE CAN GET A BEN BERNANKE
PIGGY BANKY.Copy !req
143. I'M SO SORRY ABOUT MY MOTHER.Copy !req
144. - DON'T WORRY,
SOME PEOPLE JUST DON'T HAVECopy !req
145. AN UNHEALTHY OBSESSION
WITH MONEY.Copy !req
146. - YOU TOTALLY GET US!Copy !req
147. - IS THERE ANYTHING BEHIND
THE SCENES YOU CAN SHOW US,Copy !req
148. SOMETHING COMPLETELY TOP SECRET?Copy !req
149. - OH, THE THINGS
I COULD SHOW YOUCopy !req
150. IF I WASN'T WORRIED
ABOUT GETTING FIRED.Copy !req
151. - THAT'S A CHANCE
WE'RE WILLING TO TAKE.Copy !req
152. - ME TOO.Copy !req
153. SHALL I SHOW YOU HOW WE REALLY
RUN THE ECONOMY THESE DAYS?Copy !req
154. - DEFINITELY.Copy !req
155. OH...Copy !req
156. - HOLY CURRENCY.Copy !req
157. - WHOO-HOO!Copy !req
158. WELL, DO YOU FIND IT FUNNY
HOW WE PRINT OUR PRINTED MONEY?Copy !req
159. CALL ME CLINT.Copy !req
160. - CLINT?
IN THE MINT.Copy !req
161. - I SEE YOU TOOK THE HINT.Copy !req
162. WE'RE FINALLY HOME!Copy !req
163. - I REALLY NEED YOUR HELP,
MASTER LIM.Copy !req
164. - SO WHAT YOU'RE SAYING IS,Copy !req
165. YOU WANT ME TO TEACH YOU
HOW TO BEAT UP SON.Copy !req
166. - THAT'S NOT EXACTLY
WHAT I'M SAYING.Copy !req
167. I USED A FEW MORE VERBS
AND PRONOUNS.Copy !req
168. IT'S JUST NOT NATURAL
FOR A SONCopy !req
169. TO BE STRONGER THAN HIS FATHER.Copy !req
170. - WISE MAN SAY FATHER SHOULD BE
PROUD WHEN SON SURPASS HIM.Copy !req
171. - WELL, I DON'T KNOW
THIS DR. WISEMAN,Copy !req
172. BUT, PLEASE, MY SON'S RESPECT
MEANS EVERYTHING TO ME.Copy !req
173. - WELL, I SUPPOSE
I COULD SHOW YOUCopy !req
174. ANCIENT PARALYZING HOLD.Copy !req
175. - AH, THANK YOU, MASTER LIM.Copy !req
176. OW!Copy !req
177. THAT'S PERFECT.
TEACH ME THAT.Copy !req
178. - THAT'S A HANDSHAKE.Copy !req
179. - YOU HAVE A VERY STRONG PINKIE.Copy !req
180. - FIRST THING'S FIRST.Copy !req
181. I CAN HELP YOU WITH THAT PAIN.Copy !req
182. ACUPUNCTURE COMBINED
WITH MENTAL DISCIPLINECopy !req
183. CAN HELP RELIEVE PAIN.Copy !req
184. REPEAT MANTRA
"MIND OVER MATTER."Copy !req
185. - MIND OVER MATTER.
MIND OVER MATTER.Copy !req
186. - OOPSIE.Copy !req
187. - OOPSIE WHAT?Copy !req
188. - NOTHING.Copy !req
189. THAT'S CHINESE FOR
"I NOT BREAK NEEDLE IN BACK."Copy !req
190. - GOOD.Copy !req
191. WOW, MY PAIN IS GONE.Copy !req
192. I FEEL GREAT, MASTER LIM.Copy !req
193. SO WHAT'S THE DAMAGE?Copy !req
194. - WHY YOU SAY THAT?Copy !req
195. NO DAMAGE.
YOU FINE.Copy !req
196. BYE-BYE.Copy !req
197. - OH, OKAY.Copy !req
198. MIND OVER MATTER.Copy !req
199. MIND OVER MATTER.Copy !req
200. MIND OVER MATTER.Copy !req
201. - HEY, MY GLASS!Copy !req
202. - HOLY COW.
I DIDN'T FEEL THAT.Copy !req
203. DO I HAVE SUPER STRENGTH?Copy !req
204. STUPID PICKLE JAR.Copy !req
205. AM I TOTALLY RESISTANT
TO PAIN?Copy !req
206. OKAY, BAND-AID, HERE WE GO.Copy !req
207. THAT DIDN'T HURT AT ALL.Copy !req
208. I'M INVINCIBLE!Copy !req
209. - OH, WEE!Copy !req
210. WENDY, JUMP IN.
THE MONEY IS WARM.Copy !req
211. - I'M PRINTING MORE CASH
FOR OUR STIMULUS PACKAGE,Copy !req
212. FOR HEALTH CARE, BAILOUTS,
AND THE WAR-IN-IRAQ-AGE.Copy !req
213. - PRINTING ALL THIS MONEYCopy !req
214. IS GOING TO LEAD
TO RAMPANT INFLATION.Copy !req
215. A CANDY BAR WILL COST $100.Copy !req
216. - I THOUGHT OF THAT PROBLEM,
AND I'LL FIX IT SOON,Copy !req
217. BY DROPPING MORE MONEY
FROM MY MORE-MONEY BALLOON.Copy !req
218. - SEE?
HE'S GOT IT ALL UNDER CONTROL.Copy !req
219. YOU'RE BOTH NUTS.Copy !req
220. - CONOR CHOP!Copy !req
221. HI-YA!
- THAT ALMOST TICKLES.Copy !req
222. - YOU'RE NOT FEELING THIS
AT ALL?Copy !req
223. - YEAH, YOUR OLD MAN'S
PRETTY TOUGH, HUH?Copy !req
224. I JUST ACTED LIKE A WIMP
THE OTHER DAYCopy !req
225. TO BUILD UP YOUR CONFIDENCE.Copy !req
226. - COOL.Copy !req
227. BUT YOU TELLING ME THAT
MAKES ME FEEL LESS CONFIDENT.Copy !req
228. - CONOR, I CANNOT ALWAYS
HOLD YOUR HAND.Copy !req
229. CAN I TRY?Copy !req
230. - NOT UNTIL YOU'RE 21.Copy !req
231. - COURTNEY, SWIMMING
IN ALL THAT MONEYCopy !req
232. DID SOMETHING TO YOUR BRAIN,Copy !req
233. AND DEVALUING THE DOLLAR
WILL LEAD TO RUNAWAY INFLATION.Copy !req
234. - ALARMIST.Copy !req
235. THEY'RE JUST STIMULATING
THE ECONOMYCopy !req
236. BY LOOSENING THE MONEY SUPPLY.Copy !req
237. - BICKERING OVER ECONOMICS
AGAIN?Copy !req
238. WHY CAN'T YOU FIGHT OVER
IMPORTANT THINGS,Copy !req
239. LIKE REALITY SHOWS
OR MIRACLE DIETS?Copy !req
240. - WENDY, THEY KNOW WHAT
THEY'RE DOING.Copy !req
241. THE GOVERNMENT KEEPS TRACK
OF EVERY DIME THEY MAKE.Copy !req
242. UGH.Copy !req
243. I THINK THERE'S A PEBBLE
IN MY SHOE.Copy !req
244. THERE IT IS.Copy !req
245. - THE SECRET, SON,
IS REPEATING THE MANTRACopy !req
246. "MIND OVER MATTER."Copy !req
247. - OH, "MIND OVER MATTER.
MIND OVER MATTER."Copy !req
248. - OH, HANGNAIL.Copy !req
249. - DAD!
IT'S THAT GANG AGAIN.Copy !req
250. WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING.Copy !req
251. - WE WILL, SON.Copy !req
252. WE'RE GOING TO WALK AWAY
AND FEEL ASHAMEDCopy !req
253. FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES.Copy !req
254. - STOP,
OR MY DAD WILL BEAT YOU UP!Copy !req
255. - IS THAT SO, MONKEY BOY?Copy !req
256. - HEY, WE'RE ALL PRIMATES HERE.Copy !req
257. LET'S CHILL OUT,Copy !req
258. CRANK UP A LITTLE ORGAN MUSIC.Copy !req
259. THAT DOES IT.Copy !req
260. YOU WILL NEVER MESS
WITH MY SON AGAIN.Copy !req
261. - HE'S A FREAK OF NATURECopy !req
262. OR POSSIBLY NURTURE.Copy !req
263. LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.Copy !req
264. - YOUR FATHER, HE'S A HERO.Copy !req
265. - NO, I'M JUST AN ORDINARY MAN,Copy !req
266. WHO PULLED THAT HANGNAIL
WAY TOO FAR.Copy !req
267. - YOU'RE TOO MODEST.Copy !req
268. ANYONE ELSE WOULD'VE
JUST WALKED RIGHT ON BY.Copy !req
269. - WELL, IF THERE IS ONE THING
THAT I WANT TO TEACH MY SON,Copy !req
270. IT'S THAT SOMETIMES A MAN'SCopy !req
271. JUST GOT TO STAND UP
FOR HIMSELF,Copy !req
272. EVEN IF HE KNOWS
HE'S GONNA GET KNOCKED DOWN.Copy !req
273. - COOL.Copy !req
274. ALTHOUGH, I WISH YOUR STATEMENT
WAS GENDER-NEUTRAL.Copy !req
275. - YOU HEARD THOSE PEOPLE, DAD.
YOU'RE A HERO.Copy !req
276. AND WITH THE RIGHT COSTUME,
YOU COULD BE...Copy !req
277. A SUPERHERO.Copy !req
278. - OH, SON.Copy !req
279. BECOMING A SUPERHERO
ISN'T AS SIMPLE AS THAT.Copy !req
280. I MEAN, WHERE WOULD WE POSSIBLY
FIND A FLAMBOYANT CAPE,Copy !req
281. LEOTARD, AND OVERSIZED CODPIECE
IN SAN FRANCISCO?Copy !req
282. CRIMINALS OF FRISCO, BEWARE.Copy !req
283. YOU'RE ABOUT TO GET
A ROOT CANAL,Copy !req
284. PERFORMED BY THE TOOTH FAIRY.Copy !req
285. - AND KARATE BOY.Copy !req
286. HI-YA!Copy !req
287. - HUH?Copy !req
288. - OH, YOU DOGS.Copy !req
289. - UGH!Copy !req
290. AH!Copy !req
291. - GOT IT!Copy !req
292. - THANK YOU.Copy !req
293. - WHO WANTS A HUG?Copy !req
294. YOU WOKE THE BABY.Copy !req
295. - UGH!Copy !req
296. - THANK YOU, TOOTH FAIRY.Copy !req
297. - HI-YA!Copy !req
298. WE DID GOOD TODAY, TOOTH FAIRY.Copy !req
299. - NO, KARATE BOY.Copy !req
300. WE DID WELL.Copy !req
301. OR IS IT "GOODER"?Copy !req
302. WE'LL LOOK IT UP
WHEN WE GET HOME.Copy !req
303. - I'M TELLING YOU,Copy !req
304. PRICES ARE GOING TO GO UP
BEFORE YOU KNOW IT.Copy !req
305. - YOU'RE OVERREACTING,Copy !req
306. LIKE WHEN I USED YOUR TOOTHBRUSH
TO TAKE OFF MY NAIL POLISH.Copy !req
307. - FIRST OF ALL,
I COULDN'T HAVE OVERREACTEDCopy !req
308. BECAUSE THIS IS THE FIRST
I'M HEARING OF THAT.Copy !req
309. AND SECONDLY...
- $2?Copy !req
310. THIS ISN'T RIGHT.Copy !req
311. HYPERINFLATION.Copy !req
312. IT'S HAPPENING!Copy !req
313. WE NEED TO FIX THIS.Copy !req
314. - JUST A SEC.Copy !req
315. I NEED 20 BUCKS
FOR A NEW TOOTHBRUSH.Copy !req
316. - SO CAN WE FIGHT CRIME TOMORROWCopy !req
317. AND THE NEXT DAY
AND THE NEXT DAY,Copy !req
318. SEE A MOVIE ON MONDAY,Copy !req
319. AND THEN FIGHT CRIME AGAIN
THE NEXT DAY?Copy !req
320. - WE'LL SEE.Copy !req
321. THE FRISCANS NEED TO LEARN
HOW TO SURVIVE WITHOUT US.Copy !req
322. THEY'LL BE FINE,
UNTIL THE NEXT EARTHQUAKE, FIRE,Copy !req
323. OR ZODIAC KILLER.Copy !req
324. - I DON'T KNOW IF I'M MORE PROUD
BEING YOUR SONCopy !req
325. OR YOUR SIDEKICK.Copy !req
326. - WOW, I'M TOUCHED, SON.Copy !req
327. I DON'T WANT THIS MOMENT
TO EVER END.Copy !req
328. - GLENN, THE BACHELOR'S
GIVING OUT THE FINAL ROSE!Copy !req
329. - GOTTA GO!
NIGHT, BOY.Copy !req
330. I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE KEPT JEFF.
HE'S GOT A BOYFRIEND.Copy !req
331. AND HE'S USING HER TO PROMOTE
HIS LINE OF HANDBAGS.Copy !req
332. - WHAT THE HELL IS THAT
ON YOUR NIPPLE?Copy !req
333. - AH, IT'S JUST A STRAY HAIR.Copy !req
334. - NO, THE OTHER ONE.Copy !req
335. - JONATHAN,
THAT'S WHERE YOU WENT.Copy !req
336. UGH!Copy !req
337. - UGH!Copy !req
338. - JACKIE, RELAX.Copy !req
339. I DON'T NEED NIPPLES ANYMORE.
THE KIDS ARE GROWN.Copy !req
340. - WHY AREN'T YOU SCREAMING
IN PAIN?Copy !req
341. OH, LOOK AT YOU.
ALL THESE SCRAPES AND BRUISES.Copy !req
342. IS THIS IS A NEEDLE STICKING OUT
OF YOUR NECK?Copy !req
343. beep!Copy !req
344. - JACKIE, YOU CLEARLY
DON'T UNDERSTANDCopy !req
345. THE PRINCIPLE OF MIND OVER—Copy !req
346. AH-AH!Copy !req
347. RAT TRAP, FLOWERPOT, CACTUS!Copy !req
348. DOG BITE, GLASS WINDOW,
BAND-AID!Copy !req
349. - OH, I'M SORRY.
I'LL PUT IT BACK.Copy !req
350. - BUT, MOM,
YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE US.Copy !req
351. THERE'S A—Copy !req
352. - YEAH, YEAH.
A GUY NAMED CLINT IN THE MINTCopy !req
353. WHO'S GOING TO DESTROY
THE WORLD'S ECONOMYCopy !req
354. BY LAUNCHING A MONEY BALLOON.Copy !req
355. - WELL, WHEN YOU SAY IT
LIKE THAT, IT SOUNDS RIDICULOUS.Copy !req
356. - GIRLS, PLEASE.
YOUR DAD IS VERY HURT.Copy !req
357. HE KEPT ME UP ALL NIGHT
ABOUT IT.Copy !req
358. - HANGNAIL!Copy !req
359. - STILL NOT AS BAD
AS CHILDBIRTH, GLENN!Copy !req
360. - UGH, EVEN MY LIPS HURT.Copy !req
361. - THE DOCTOR SAID YOUR BODY
ABSORBED A LOT OF DAMAGE,Copy !req
362. AND YOU NEED TO REST.Copy !req
363. - BUT CONOR CAN'T SEE ME
LIKE THIS.Copy !req
364. - CONOR RESPECTS YOU
BECAUSE YOU'RE A GREAT DAD,Copy !req
365. NOT BECAUSE YOUR NEW NIPPLECopy !req
366. WAS GROWN ON THE BACK
OF A LAB MOUSE.Copy !req
367. - MORNING, DAD.
YAH!Copy !req
368. IS THAT ALL YOU GOT?Copy !req
369. - WHAT ARE WE
GONNA BUST UP TODAY?Copy !req
370. A DOG FIGHT, JEWEL HEIST,
RAIDERS TAILGATE?Copy !req
371. - SORRY, SON,Copy !req
372. BUT THE TOOTH FAIRY
AND KARATE BOY ARE FINISHED.Copy !req
373. - BUT WHY?Copy !req
374. I THOUGHT YOU SAID
WE WERE A GREAT TEAM.Copy !req
375. - HERE'S THE TRUTH, SON.Copy !req
376. I JUST DON'T WANT YOU
TO GET HURT.Copy !req
377. OW. OW. OW. OW. OW.Copy !req
378. MAYBE DAD DOESN'T THINK
I'M READY, BUT I KNOW I AM.Copy !req
379. I'LL FIGHT CRIME ON MY OWN.Copy !req
380. ONE DAY I'LL GROW INTO
HIS CODPIECE.Copy !req
381. UNTIL THEN,
I'LL WEAR IT RIGHT HERE.Copy !req
382. CRIMINALS OF FRISCO, BEWARE!Copy !req
383. - GAH!Copy !req
384. - JACKPOT.Copy !req
385. - IT'S TIME FOR A... CHANGE.Copy !req
386. YOU SEE, THAT HAS TWO MEANINGS,
BECAUSE—Copy !req
387. - YO!
IT'S MONKEY BOY.Copy !req
388. - MY NAME'S NOT SOMETHING DUMB
LIKE MONKEY BOY.Copy !req
389. IT'S KARATE BOY.
HEE-YA!Copy !req
390. PREPARE TO MEET DOOM
FROM MY FOOT,Copy !req
391. AND NOT JUST BECAUSE IT SMELLS.Copy !req
392. CAN YOU COME A LITTLE CLOSER,
PLEASE?Copy !req
393. ONE MORE SMIDGE?Copy !req
394. PERFECT.Copy !req
395. YAH!Copy !req
396. UGH!Copy !req
397. HEY, WOULD YOU MIND
SNIFFING MY FOOT?Copy !req
398. SEE IF THAT WORKS?Copy !req
399. - COME ON, THIS CAN'T BE
THAT DIFFERENTCopy !req
400. FROM MY MALIBU BARBIE DREAM CAR.Copy !req
401. IF ONLY THE DASHBOARD
WERE A BIG STICKER.Copy !req
402. - WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
403. - SAVING THE WORLD FROM ANOTHER
GLOBAL ECONOMIC MELTDOWN.Copy !req
404. - HMM. WHERE IS THAT BURRITO
I USED TO STUFF MY CODPIECE?Copy !req
405. AND WHERE'S MY CODPIECE?
AND KARATE BOY'S COSTUME?Copy !req
406. HOLY FREELANCING SIDEKICK.Copy !req
407. OW. OW. OW. OW.Copy !req
408. - WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
- COURTNEY!Copy !req
409. - REVERSE THRUSTERS.
- I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.Copy !req
410. - NEITHER DO IT.Copy !req
411. - AH!Copy !req
412. AW, THANKS, GLENN!Copy !req
413. WOULD YOU BE MORE—Copy !req
414. GIRLS, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
415. - WE'RE GOING TO THE MINT!Copy !req
416. - AH, NOT THE BORING MINT!Copy !req
417. CABLE CAR!Copy !req
418. LET ME GO, OR PREPARE
TO BE SOAKED BY MY TEARS.Copy !req
419. - THIS IS FOR YOUR FATHER
EMBARRASSING MECopy !req
420. IN FRONT OF MY VICTIMS.Copy !req
421. - TIME FOR A CAVITY SEARCH.Copy !req
422. AH!Copy !req
423. WHY THE FUNNY BONE?
AH!Copy !req
424. - DAD—I MEAN, TOOTH FAIRY!Copy !req
425. - LET MY SON GO.Copy !req
426. - HEY, IT'S THE FREAK,
AND HE CAN FEEL PAIN NOW.Copy !req
427. - NO, I DON'T FEEL ANYTHING.Copy !req
428. AH-HA-OW!Copy !req
429. WOULD YOU PLEASE STOP
DOING THAT?Copy !req
430. - LET'S GO.
- COME BACK HERE!Copy !req
431. - RIGHT AFTER WE SAVE THE WORLD.Copy !req
432. - I'M TELLING YOU, MOM.Copy !req
433. THE MAGICAL MONEY ROOM
IS RIGHT IN HERE.Copy !req
434. - WHAT?
THERE—NO.Copy !req
435. THERE WERE COIN BALLOONS
AND A MONEY RIVER.Copy !req
436. - UH-HUH.Copy !req
437. YOU GIRLS ARE IN SO MUCH—Copy !req
438. - THAT'S HIM,
CLINT IN THE MINT!Copy !req
439. CLINT IN THE MINT.Copy !req
440. DELIGHTFUL IMAGINATION.Copy !req
441. NO, I'M JUST A TOUR GUIDE
WHO WANTED TO BE AN ACTOR,Copy !req
442. AND NOW I'M JUST SLOWLY
POISONING MYSELF WITH WHISKEY.Copy !req
443. - LIAR!Copy !req
444. WE'RE NOT LEAVING UNTIL
YOU SHOW HER THE MONEY RIVER.Copy !req
445. - THAT SOUNDED LIKE A THREATCopy !req
446. AGAINST A GOVERNMENT
INSTALLATION.Copy !req
447. CARE TO GO FOR RED?Copy !req
448. - I'M SORRY WE BOTHERED YOU.
GIRLS?Copy !req
449. - MRS. MARTIN,
I KNOW THAT YOU GLAZE OVERCopy !req
450. EVERY TIME WE TALK
ABOUT ECONOMIC THEORY,Copy !req
451. BUT YOU NEED TO LISTEN.Copy !req
452. THIS TOUR GUIDE IS REALLY
A RHYME-SPOUTING MADMANCopy !req
453. WHO'S GOING TO CROP-DUST
THE COUNTRY WITH CASH.Copy !req
454. - MADAM,
THEY ARE OBVIOUSLY LYING.Copy !req
455. - HMM.Copy !req
456. OKAY, I'M SORRY
FOR THE INCONVENIENCE.Copy !req
457. AH-HA!Copy !req
458. - I'VE BEEN EXPOSED,
I DO SUPPOSE.Copy !req
459. AND SO I GOES!
WHOO HOO HOO!Copy !req
460. - WHAT THE...Copy !req
461. crash!Copy !req
462. - YEAH, THAT'S THE GUY.Copy !req
463. - WOW.Copy !req
464. - GOOD WORK, CHILDREN.Copy !req
465. - IT'S CHAIRMAN
OF THE FEDERAL RESERVECopy !req
466. BEN BERNANKE.Copy !req
467. - I ASSURE YOU,
THIS ROGUE IN NO WAY REPRESENTSCopy !req
468. THE POLICIES
OF THE U.S. GOVERNMENT.Copy !req
469. HE WILL BE MET
WITH SWIFT JUSTICE.Copy !req
470. - IT'S REASSURING TO KNOW
THAT OUR POLITICAL LEADERSCopy !req
471. HAVE EVERYTHING WELL IN HAND.Copy !req
472. - SO WHO WANTS
TO HIT THE GIFT SHOP?Copy !req
473. - I'M STILL MAD AT YOU
FOR DISOBEYING ME.Copy !req
474. BUT YOU DID SAVE
THE WORLD'S ECONOMY, SO...Copy !req
475. YOU'RE ONLY GROUNDED
FOR A MONTH.Copy !req
476. - CLINT, YOU ALMOST BLEW
THE WHOLE OPERATION.Copy !req
477. NOW PLEASE SPEED UP
WITH THAT MONEY BALLOON.Copy !req
478. EVERY WALL STREET EXEC
GETS A GOLDEN SPITTOON!Copy !req
479. - ALL RIGHT, TOOTHY FAIRY.Copy !req
480. WE'RE GOING TO TEACH YOU TO
ENGAGE IN CIVIC RESPONSIBILITY.Copy !req
481. - YOU CAN BREAK MY BONES,
BUT YOU CAN'T BREAK MY SPIRIT.Copy !req
482. BREAK MY SPIRIT!
BREAK MY SPIRIT!Copy !req
483. - DAD!Copy !req
484. - LOOK AWAY, SON.Copy !req
485. BUT NOT THERE.Copy !req
486. BUT NOT THERE EITHER.Copy !req
487. AND FOR GOD SAKES, NOT THERE.Copy !req
488. - SAY GOOD-BYE
TO THE TOOTH FAIRY.Copy !req
489. - THEN YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE
TO SAY GOOD-BYE TO ME TOO,Copy !req
490. BECAUSE I ALSO
AM THE TOOTH FAIRY.Copy !req
491. THANK YOU, STRANGER.Copy !req
492. YOU INSPIRE ME
TO STAND UP FOR MYSELF.Copy !req
493. - FINE, YOU'RE NEXT, CALAMARI.Copy !req
494. - AND I'M THE TOOTH FAIRY,Copy !req
495. EVEN THOUGH I HAVE NO TEETH.Copy !req
496. - YOU'LL HAVE TO GO THROUGH US,Copy !req
497. BECAUSE WE'RE TOOTH FAIRIES TOO.Copy !req
498. - AND WE WANT
OUR NEIGHBORHOOD BACK.Copy !req
499. - YES, AND A PARADE
FOR KATHY GRIFFIN.Copy !req
500. - KATHY GRIFFIN?
THESE GUYS ARE CRAZY.Copy !req
501. - THAT WAS REALLY TOUCHING.Copy !req
502. THANK YOU, GAY GUYS, HIPPIES,
AND FOREIGNERS SEEKING ASYLUM.Copy !req
503. - NO, THANK YOU.Copy !req
504. BECAUSE OF YOU, I'M NO LONGERCopy !req
505. A STRAIGHT GUY FROM IOWACopy !req
506. WHO JUST WANTED TO MAKE
A FEW FRIENDS.Copy !req
507. - YOUR POWERS ARE AWESOME, DAD.Copy !req
508. - OH, SON,
I DON'T HAVE ANY POWERS.Copy !req
509. IT WAS JUST SOME FORTUITOUS
MEDICAL MALPRACTICE.Copy !req
510. - NO, THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT.Copy !req
511. - I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE STRONGER
THAN ME.Copy !req
512. YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT WHERE
THE CODPIECE GOES, RIGHT?Copy !req