1. - THAT'S ME, GLENN MARTIN,Copy !req
2. FATHER, DENTIST, LOVER,Copy !req
3. BUT MOSTLY FATHER
AND DENTIST.Copy !req
4. I TOOK MY FAMILY ON A ROAD TRIP
SO WE CAN GROW CLOSER.Copy !req
5. WELL, THAT, AND I BURNED
THE HOUSE DOWN.Copy !req
6. SO IT'S ME,
MY WIFE, JACKIE—Copy !req
7. SHE'S THE SWEETEST—
OH!Copy !req
8. OUR SON CONOR,
THE LADIES' MAN,Copy !req
9. HIS SISTER COURTNEY.Copy !req
10. WE'LL ALL BE WORKING
FOR HER ONE DAY.Copy !req
11. IN FACT, HER ASSISTANT WENDY
ALREADY IS.Copy !req
12. OOH, CAN'T FORGET CANINE.Copy !req
13. HE'S GOT A GIANT...Copy !req
14. HEART.Copy !req
15. WANT TO HEAR US WHISTLE?Copy !req
16. - KIDS, THIS IS IMPORTANT.Copy !req
17. YOU CANNOT LIVE IN AMERICA
WITHOUT KNOWINGCopy !req
18. HOW TO SPEAK SPANISH.Copy !req
19. OKAY, TIME FOR
THE LIGHTNING ROUND.Copy !req
20. COMO SE DICE'BOOK"?Copy !req
21. COURTNE-OLA!Copy !req
22. - EL LIBRO.Copy !req
23. - WENDI-ELA,
I WAS ASKING COURTNE-OLA.Copy !req
24. - IT'S OKAY, MOM.Copy !req
25. SHE'S FULLY AUTHORIZED
TO ANSWER ON MY BEHALF.Copy !req
26. - IT'S TRUE, MRS. "M."Copy !req
27. I ALSO HAVE POWER OF ATTORNEY
AND PROXY VOTINGCopy !req
28. FOR HER SHARE OF VIACOM.Copy !req
29. - AND YET I STILL HAD TO CATCH
MY OWN KOOSH BALL.Copy !req
30. - WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN.Copy !req
31. - CONOR-OLIO,
COMO SE DICE'PENCIL"?Copy !req
32. - OW!
MY EYE!Copy !req
33. AH!Copy !req
34. - OH, MY GOD!Copy !req
35. - PSYCHE.Copy !req
36. IT'S KETCHUP.Copy !req
37. - CONOR.Copy !req
38. - KIDS, YOU NEED TO TAKE
THIS SERIOUSLY.Copy !req
39. THIS IS REAL SCHOOL,Copy !req
40. AND LIKE REAL SCHOOL,
YOUR TEACHER'S UNDERPAID,Copy !req
41. OVERWORKED, AND UNDERQUALIFIED.Copy !req
42. UGH.
- SORRY.Copy !req
43. IT JUST SLIPPED OUT.Copy !req
44. - NEXT UP, ILLINOIS.Copy !req
45. LAND OF LINCOLN.Copy !req
46. INDIANA?Copy !req
47. UGH, THAT'S LAND
OF JACKSON FIVE.Copy !req
48. NAVIGATOR JACKIE, PLEASE REPORT
TO THE CROW'S NEST.Copy !req
49. - I'M SORRY, HONEY,
BUT I CAN'T BE YOUR NAVIGATOR.Copy !req
50. I'M BUSY HOMESCHOOLING THE KIDS.Copy !req
51. - OH, YOU ARE TOO MY NAVIGATORCopy !req
52. AND MY FIRST MATE.Copy !req
53. WELL, NOT MY FIRST MATE,
BUT THE FIRST ONE I LOVED,Copy !req
54. BUT NOT—NOT—NOT THE FIRST ONE
I SAID I LOVED.Copy !req
55. BOY, DID SHE CRY AFTER
PROM NIGHT.Copy !req
56. WAIT.
WHERE'D YOU GO?Copy !req
57. HMM. OMINOUS.Copy !req
58. - GLENN, WHERE ARE WE?Copy !req
59. - WELL, I CAN'T FIND IT
ON THE MAP,Copy !req
60. BUT I'M GOING TO SAY
SEVENTH CIRCLE OF HELL.Copy !req
61. YEAH, THIS IS THE PLACE
ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
62. - I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.
I'M GOING TO DIE HERE.Copy !req
63. - PERHAPS, BUT IF YOU DO,Copy !req
64. IT'LL BE IN YOUR OWN BED.Copy !req
65. ISN'T THAT HOW EVERYONE
WANTS TO GO?Copy !req
66. - HELP ME.Copy !req
67. - LOOK, THE TIRE GUY'S COMING
FIRST THING IN THE MORNING,Copy !req
68. AND IN MY DEFENSE, WE WOULDN'T
HAVE GOTTEN LOST IF YOU HAD—Copy !req
69. - IF I WASN'T WORKING
MY BUTT OFF TRYING TO EDUCATECopy !req
70. OUR CHILDREN
ON AN ENDLESS ROAD TRIPCopy !req
71. THAT YOU INSISTED WE TAKE?Copy !req
72. - THERE WERE IN YOUR WOMB
FOR NINE MONTHSCopy !req
73. AND SUDDENLY
THEY'RE MY CHILDREN?Copy !req
74. - NEED... MEDICAL... ATTENTION.Copy !req
75. - YOU SAID WE WERE GOING TO
SHARE THE TEACHING,Copy !req
76. YET I DO IT ALL.Copy !req
77. MATH, SPANISH, DRAMA.Copy !req
78. I'VE GOT TWO WEEKS BEFORE OUR
PRODUCTION OF GREASEGOES UP.Copy !req
79. STILL DON'T HAVE A KENICKIE.Copy !req
80. - OKAY, I GET IT.
YOU'RE OVERWHELMED.Copy !req
81. YOU KNOW WHAT I LIKE TO DO
WHEN I'M OVERWHELMED?Copy !req
82. MAKE LOVE.Copy !req
83. RELAX, GIRLS.Copy !req
84. BULLETS ARE POOR PEOPLE'S
FIREWORKS.Copy !req
85. THEY PROBABLY JUST WON
A SPORTS CHAMPIONSHIP.Copy !req
86. R7-80s.Copy !req
87. DON'T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS,
BUT IT SOUNDS GOOD.Copy !req
88. HEY, THANKS AGAIN FOR—Copy !req
89. WHOA.
WHAT IS THAT?Copy !req
90. - IT'S NORTHSTAR.Copy !req
91. ONE OF THOSE OPERATOR-ASSISTED
NAVIGATION SYSTEMS.Copy !req
92. NOW I CAN BE WITH THE KIDS,Copy !req
93. AND YOU CAN GET DIRECTIONS
FROM THE OPERATOR.Copy !req
94. - YEAH, YOUR WIFE SAYS
YOU GET LOST A LOT.Copy !req
95. - I DON'T GET LOST.Copy !req
96. - SO YOU CAME HERE ON PURPOSE?Copy !req
97. - AGH!Copy !req
98. - YES, TO GET RID OF MY TIRES,Copy !req
99. AND IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS,
THANK YOU.Copy !req
100. - HONEY, IT'S NOTHING TO BE
ASHAMED OF.Copy !req
101. - THAT'S RIGHT.Copy !req
102. 10% OF OUR CLIENTS ARE MEN,Copy !req
103. AND 5% OF THOSE ARE STRAIGHT.Copy !req
104. - I AM A DENTIST, SIR,Copy !req
105. AND YOU WILL TREAT ME
WITH RESPECT.Copy !req
106. - GOTCHA.Copy !req
107. SO YOU JUST HIT THIS BUTTON,Copy !req
108. AND IT WILL GIVE YOU DIRECTIONS
TO ANY PEDICURE PLACE IN TOWN.Copy !req
109. - OH, OKAY.
YOU SOLD ME.Copy !req
110. - HI, I'M CONOR MARTIN.Copy !req
111. I'D APPRECIATE YOUR VOTE.Copy !req
112. - THAT IS NOT HOW YOU SPELL
"HONOR."Copy !req
113. - BUT IT IS HOW YOU SPELL
"CONOR," RIGHT?Copy !req
114. - WHAT IS THIS?Copy !req
115. - MOM SAID THIS WAS
A REAL SCHOOL,Copy !req
116. SO I'M RUNNING
FOR CLASS PRESIDENT.Copy !req
117. - ONLY AN IDIOT WANTS TO BE
PRESIDENT OF THREE PEOPLE,Copy !req
118. AND IF ANYONE'S GOING TO BE
PRESIDENT,Copy !req
119. IT'S GOING TO BE ME.Copy !req
120. HELLO, TIME FOR SCIENCE CLASS.Copy !req
121. I AM ARGON,
ONE OF THE NOBLE GASES.Copy !req
122. - YOU ONLY WANT TO BE PRESIDENT
BECAUSE I WANT TO BE PRESIDENT.Copy !req
123. - I HAVE 18 PROTONS.Copy !req
124. LET ME INTRODUCE YOU
TO MY NEIGHBOR HELIUM.Copy !req
125. I ONLY HAVE TWO PROTONS.Copy !req
126. - WHATEVER.
YOU LOSE TWO TO ONE.Copy !req
127. - ACTUALLY, I'M UNDECIDED.Copy !req
128. - YOU'RE WHAT?Copy !req
129. - DAMN IT.Copy !req
130. WHEN ARE YOU KIDS GOING TO TAKE
ME SERIOUSLY?Copy !req
131. - GET OFF!Copy !req
132. - ARE WE LOST?Copy !req
133. - LOST?
NO.Copy !req
134. JUST ENJOYING
THE BEAUTIFUL SCENERY.Copy !req
135. - GLENN, JUST USE
THE NORTHSTAR.Copy !req
136. WE'RE GOING TO BE LATE
FOR OUR FIELD TRIP TO MEXICO.Copy !req
137. - HEY, DON'T SAY IT LIKE
IT'S THE REAL MEXICO.Copy !req
138. IT'S MEXICO, INDIANA.Copy !req
139. I CAN FIND THE REAL MEXICO.Copy !req
140. I FOUND IT THAT TIME WE WERE
TRYING TO GET TO NEBRASKA.Copy !req
141. ding!Copy !req
142. - OPERATOR 386.Copy !req
143. HOW MAY I HELP YOU?Copy !req
144. - WE NEED DIRECTIONS
TO MEXICO, INDIANA.Copy !req
145. - OH, COME ON.Copy !req
146. - I'LL TALK YOU
RIGHT THROUGH IT.Copy !req
147. - JUST DO WHAT SHE SAYS, GLENN.Copy !req
148. - ARE YOU READY, MR. MARTIN?Copy !req
149. - ACTUALLY, DOCTORMARTIN.Copy !req
150. - OOH.Copy !req
151. NOW, I WANT YOU TO GRAB
THE WHEEL NICE AND GENTLE.Copy !req
152. ARE YOU GRABBING IT?Copy !req
153. - YEAH.Copy !req
154. - I WANT YOU TO TAKE
THE 31 SOUTH.Copy !req
155. DO YOU LIKE GOING SOUTH?Copy !req
156. - UM, YEAH.
I SUPPOSE.Copy !req
157. - I'LL TAKE YOU WHEREVER
YOU WANT TO GO.Copy !req
158. INTERCOURSE, PENNSYLVANIA.Copy !req
159. MOORHEAD, MINNESOTA.Copy !req
160. EVEN CLIMAX, FLORIDA.Copy !req
161. - OKAY.
GOTTA GO.Copy !req
162. thud!Copy !req
163. OH, GOD.
WHAT NOW?Copy !req
164. - POOR LITTLE GUY.Copy !req
165. CAN WE GET SOME FIRECRACKERS
AND BLOW IT UP?Copy !req
166. - NO, SOME GOOD MUST COME
FROM THIS TRAGEDY.Copy !req
167. WE'RE GOING TO STUDY BIOLOGY.Copy !req
168. THEN WE'RE GOING TO BLOW
IT UP.Copy !req
169. - YOU ARE NOT BRINGING THAT
INTO THE RV.Copy !req
170. - YOU WANTED ME TO TEACH.Copy !req
171. THIS IS HOW YOU BRING SCIENCE
TO LIFE, LADY ARGON.Copy !req
172. FIRST, A VERY SMALL INCISION
JUST TO EXPOSE—Copy !req
173. - AGH!Copy !req
174. - OH, THIS IS AWFUL.Copy !req
175. - WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO, DAD?Copy !req
176. - HE'S MORTALLY WOUNDED, HONEY.Copy !req
177. THE ONLY THING WE CAN DO IS—Copy !req
178. NO!Copy !req
179. - PUT HIM OUT OF HIS MISERY.Copy !req
180. NO!Copy !req
181. - MAYBE IT WOULD'VE BEEN OKAY,Copy !req
182. BUT NOT AFTER THAT
CRIPPLING BLOW.Copy !req
183. NO!Copy !req
184. - NO, NO, NOW HE'S REALLY PAST
THE POINT OF NO RETURN.Copy !req
185. - DADDY, STOP.
- I CAN'T DO IT.Copy !req
186. IT WOULD BE INHUMANE.Copy !req
187. JUST SOLID WHACK TO THE HEAD.Copy !req
188. WHY WON'T YOU DIE?Copy !req
189. - OOH!Copy !req
190. DAD, PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!Copy !req
191. - OH, MAN, THIS THING'S GOT
A LUST FOR LIFE.Copy !req
192. YOU GUYS DON'T HATE ME,
DO YOU?Copy !req
193. - UNBELIEVABLE.Copy !req
194. - HURRY UP, BOY.Copy !req
195. DO YOUR THING.
IT'S FREEZING OUT HERE.Copy !req
196. HMM.Copy !req
197. - OH, DR. MARTIN.Copy !req
198. READY TO GO ON ANOTHER RIDE?Copy !req
199. - I DON'T KNOW WHY I CALLED.Copy !req
200. - I KNOW WHY YOU CALLED.Copy !req
201. YOU CAN'T SLEEP, AND YOU FEEL
NO ONE UNDERSTANDS YOU.Copy !req
202. LET ME HELP YOU RELAX.Copy !req
203. LEAN BACK,
TURN ON SOME SOFT MUSIC.Copy !req
204. - LIKE THIS?
- NO.Copy !req
205. LITTLE MORE.
LITTLE MORE.Copy !req
206. OOH, RIGHT THERE.Copy !req
207. OH, MY GOD.Copy !req
208. I LOVE THIS STATION.Copy !req
209. - YEAH, YOU LIKE THAT, HUH?Copy !req
210. YEAH, I KNEW YOU'D LIKE THAT.Copy !req
211. YOU LIKE IT SLOW,
AND YOU LIKE IT—Copy !req
212. OOH!Copy !req
213. - YOU OKAY, DOCTOR?Copy !req
214. - I'LL JUST WIPE THIS UP.Copy !req
215. - YOU THINK YOU CAN GO
ANOTHER ROUND, DOCTOR?Copy !req
216. - OH, I KNOW I CAN.Copy !req
217. SKYHOOK,
OFF THE MIRROR,Copy !req
218. OFF THE HEADREST,
HIT THE CUP HOLDER,Copy !req
219. NOTHING BUT NET.Copy !req
220. OH, OH, OH.Copy !req
221. YEAH, I NAILED IT.Copy !req
222. - HA HA HA.Copy !req
223. I KNOW WHEN YOU'RE LYING.Copy !req
224. NOW, FESS UP.Copy !req
225. TELL ME SOMETHING
YOU'VE NEVER TOLD ANYONE ELSE.Copy !req
226. - OKAY.Copy !req
227. WELL, JACKIE, MY WIFE,Copy !req
228. SHE HAS MICRODONTIA.Copy !req
229. WHAT?Copy !req
230. - NO, HER TEETH ARE NORMAL,Copy !req
231. BUT HER MOLARS ARE LIKE THE SIZE
OF BABY TEETH.Copy !req
232. - EWW.Copy !req
233. - NO, NO, NO,
IT'S ACTUALLY ADORABLE,Copy !req
234. BUT SHE'S REALLY INSECURE
ABOUT IT.Copy !req
235. SO DO YOU, LIKE, HAVE TOCopy !req
236. CHEW HER FOOD FOR HER?Copy !req
237. - NO.
WELL, STEAK.Copy !req
238. HEY, I DIDN'T LAUGH WHEN YOU
TOLD YOU GREW UPCopy !req
239. IN YOUR FAMILY'S JUNKYARD.Copy !req
240. - YES, YOU DID.Copy !req
241. - YEAH, I DID, DIDN'T I?Copy !req
242. - OH, I GOTTA CALL YOU LATER.Copy !req
243. LET'S GET YOU INSIDE.Copy !req
244. I'M SO SORRY, BUDDY.Copy !req
245. HAVE YOU BEEN IN HERE ALL NIGHT?Copy !req
246. - WHAT?
NO, I JUST WOKE UP.Copy !req
247. - OH, GLENN, HE JUST WENT
ON THE FLOOR.Copy !req
248. - BAD DOG.
BAD, BAD DOG.Copy !req
249. - SORRY, PAL.Copy !req
250. NEXT TIME YOU POOP ON THE FLOOR,
I'LL TAKE THE BLAME.Copy !req
251. - WHAT'S GOING ON?Copy !req
252. - IT'S TIME FOR BREAKFAST,Copy !req
253. AND I'M SERVING THE TRUTH.Copy !req
254. - CONOR MARTIN SAYS
HE DOESN'T EAT HIS OWN BOOGERS,Copy !req
255. BUT WHAT'S HE DOING
IN THESE PHOTOS?Copy !req
256. THAT'S NOT STRING CHEESE
HE'S PULLING FROM—Copy !req
257. - YOU CAN'T EVEN LET YOUR
BROTHER WIN A PRETEND ELECTION?Copy !req
258. YOU HAVE A COMPULSION
TO WIN EVERYTHING.Copy !req
259. - AND ISN'T THAT A QUALITY
YOU WANT IN A PRESIDENT?Copy !req
260. - LOOK AT ALL THIS.
OH, MAN, I QUIT.Copy !req
261. - OH, NO, YOU DON'T.Copy !req
262. YOU ARE GOING TO STAY IN THIS,
BECAUSE YOUR SISTERCopy !req
263. NEEDS TO LEARN A VALUABLE LESSONCopy !req
264. ABOUT TALKING A LOSS
IN STRIDE.Copy !req
265. - WHAT?Copy !req
266. HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO ME?
I AM—Copy !req
267. - WHOA.
CHECK IT OUT.Copy !req
268. I'M ON TV.Copy !req
269. - THIS AD PAID FOR
BY CONOR MARTIN.Copy !req
270. THAT'S HOW DUMB HE IS.Copy !req
271. - I BORROWED $10 FROM YOU.Copy !req
272. - HEY, HONEY.
- AH!Copy !req
273. ARE YOU WEARING COLOGNE?Copy !req
274. - ACTUALLY IT'S "GEE,
YOUR HAIR SMELLS TERRIFIC."Copy !req
275. I PUT SOME ON MY GOODIES.Copy !req
276. - WHY?Copy !req
277. - DOES A MAN NEED A REASON
TO LOOK GOOD?Copy !req
278. - YOU DO.
YOU WORE SWEATS TO A FUNERAL.Copy !req
279. - THEY WERE BLACK.
- THEY WERE MINE.Copy !req
280. - UGH.Copy !req
281. - I JUST THOUGHT IT'D BE FUN
TO RIDE UP HERE WITH YOU.Copy !req
282. - OH, RIGHT.
YEAH, GREAT, GREAT.Copy !req
283. A MAN AND HIS WIFE,
TILL DEATH DO US PART.Copy !req
284. - GREAT.Copy !req
285. - YOU'RE GOING TO BREAK THAT!Copy !req
286. - WHAT A DUMP.
- WAIT.Copy !req
287. WE DROVE ALL THE WAY
TO MEXICO, INDIANA,Copy !req
288. AND THERE'S NOTHING MEXICAN
HERE?Copy !req
289. - NOPE.Copy !req
290. - OH, SURELY THERE HAS TO BE
SOMETHING MEXICAN HERE.Copy !req
291. MAYBE A LANDSCAPING SERVICE?
- NOPE.Copy !req
292. - WELL, HOW ABOUT THAT PLACE?Copy !req
293. MANUEL'S TRANSMISSIONS?Copy !req
294. - THAT'S MANUALTRANSMISSIONS.Copy !req
295. I SPELLED IT WRONG.Copy !req
296. WHAT CAN I SAY?
I WAS HOMESCHOOLED.Copy !req
297. - DEAR LORD, WHAT HAVE I DONE
TO MY KIDS?Copy !req
298. - AND FINALLY, IF ELECTED,
I WILL PROHIBIT MOMCopy !req
299. FROM TEACHING SEX ED,
BECAUSE THAT'S JUST GROSS.Copy !req
300. - INTERESTING.
REBUTTAL?Copy !req
301. - I JUST SWALLOWED A FLY.Copy !req
302. - GLENN, WE'RE TAKING THE KIDS
TO THE TRANSMISSION PLACE.Copy !req
303. AT LEAST THEY'LL LEARN
WHAT HAPPENSCopy !req
304. IF YOU DON'T PAY ATTENTION
IN SCHOOL.Copy !req
305. - GREAT.Copy !req
306. I'LL GO GET DIRECTIONS
FROM NORTHSTAR.Copy !req
307. SO MY ONLY HOME RUN
OF MY LITTLE LEAGUE CAREER,Copy !req
308. AND MY DAD MISSED IT
SO HE COULD BEAT TRAFFIC.Copy !req
309. SO HE COULD BEAT TRAFFIC.Copy !req
310. - YOU CAN BEAT MY TRAFFIC
ANY TIME.Copy !req
311. - WHAT?Copy !req
312. - YOU CAN TOUCH ALL MY BASES.Copy !req
313. SLIDE IN FACE-FIRST.Copy !req
314. - I WAS TELLING YOU A TENDER
STORY ABOUT ME AND MY FATHER.Copy !req
315. - YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS TENDER?Copy !req
316. - ALL RIGHT, YEAH,
IT'S BEEN NICE CHATTING.Copy !req
317. WHAT?
WHY DID THE DOOR JUST LOCK?Copy !req
318. - OH, COME ON.
DON'T GO.Copy !req
319. - I'VE GOT TO GET BACK
TO MY WIFE.Copy !req
320. - OH, WHAT'S SHE GOING TO DO?Copy !req
321. NIBBLE YOU TO DEATH
WITH HER BABY TEETH?Copy !req
322. - EXCUSE ME, YOU'RE TALKING
ABOUT THE WOMAN I LOVE.Copy !req
323. - IF YOU LOVE HER SO MUCH,Copy !req
324. THAN WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS FLIRTING
WITH ME?Copy !req
325. - OH, COME ON, PLEASE.Copy !req
326. JUST BECAUSE WE HAPPEN TO HAVE
A FRIENDSHIPCopy !req
327. AND SOMETIMES SHARE
DOUBLE ENTENDRES,Copy !req
328. AND I OCCASIONALLY SNEAK OFF
TO TALK TO YOUCopy !req
329. UNDER THE COVER OF DARKNESS.Copy !req
330. OH, MY GOD, WHAT HAVE I DONE?Copy !req
331. AH!Copy !req
332. - GLENN, WHAT'S GOING ON?Copy !req
333. - JACKIE, I'M SORRY
I'VE TAKEN YOU FOR GRANTED.Copy !req
334. I'M—I'M SORRY I HAVEN'T HELPED
WITH THE TEACHING.Copy !req
335. - GLENN, YOU'RE SOAKING ME
IN PUDDLE WATER.Copy !req
336. - I'M SORRY I'M SOAKING YOU
IN PUDDLE WATER!Copy !req
337. I HATE YOU.Copy !req
338. WHEN I'M PRESIDENT, I'M GOING
TO GIVE YOU THE DEATH PENALTY.Copy !req
339. - AGH!Copy !req
340. - YOU WENT NEGATIVE.
REAL MATURE.Copy !req
341. - AH, THE JOY OF FAMILY.Copy !req
342. THESE ARE THE WONDER YEARS,
KIDS.Copy !req
343. CHERISH 'EM.Copy !req
344. I HELPED THE KIDS
WITH THEIR HOMEWORK,Copy !req
345. THE DISHES ARE DONE,Copy !req
346. AND YOU HAVE LOTS OF KNOTS
IN YOUR NECK.Copy !req
347. - OH, THAT FEELS SO GOOD.Copy !req
348. - MMM, I WANT YOU TO RELAX.Copy !req
349. YOU'VE EARNED IT.Copy !req
350. - OH, DR. MARTIN,
YOU SPOIL ME.Copy !req
351. THAT TICKLES.Copy !req
352. - OH!Copy !req
353. - SORRY.
- NO, I ENJOY IT.Copy !req
354. OH!Copy !req
355. TOMORROW I'LL TAKE THE KIDS
TO A MUSEUMCopy !req
356. WHILE YOU SPEND A DAY AT THE SPA
FOR SOME PAMPERING.Copy !req
357. - OH!Copy !req
358. OH!Copy !req
359. - OH, GLENN?Copy !req
360. DR. MARTIN?Copy !req
361. - ARE YOU TRYING TO WAKE UP
MY FAMILY?Copy !req
362. - JUST WANTED TO SEE HOW
YOUR MASSAGE WENT.Copy !req
363. - OKAY. OKAY.
THIS HAS GOT TO STOP.Copy !req
364. - NO! NO! NO!Copy !req
365. I WANT TO HEAR MORE ABOUT
YOUR DAD.Copy !req
366. LITTLE LEAGUE BALL.
NO MORE INNUENDO.Copy !req
367. UNLESS YOU WANT IT.Copy !req
368. DO YOU WANT IT BAD?Copy !req
369. - WOW, THIS IS BORDERING
ON UNPROFESSIONAL.Copy !req
370. LOOK, IF I LED YOU ON,
I'M SORRY.Copy !req
371. - I'M GOING TO TELL YOUR WIFE
WHAT YOU'VE BEEN UP TO.Copy !req
372. OH, JACKIE!Copy !req
373. - STOP IT!
- WAKE UP, BABY TEETH.Copy !req
374. - THAT'S IT.Copy !req
375. - I WILL NOT BE—Copy !req
376. SINGLE WHITE—
HAND THAT ROCKS THE—Copy !req
377. - I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN
SHE WAS CRAZYCopy !req
378. WHEN SHE TOLD ME TO TAKE
I-35.Copy !req
379. - NOW, MAKE SURE THEY ALL STAY
WITH YOUCopy !req
380. AND REMEMBER THAT CONOR'S
ALLERGIC—Copy !req
381. - TO CASHEWS AND CEDAR.Copy !req
382. I'VE GOT EVERYTHING
UNDER CONTROL.Copy !req
383. - THANK YOU, HONEY.Copy !req
384. - UH, DAD, START PARENTING.Copy !req
385. - AGH!Copy !req
386. - MMM, CASHEWS.Copy !req
387. AH.Copy !req
388. OH, A CEDAR TREE.Copy !req
389. - CONOR, NO.Copy !req
390. - NOW WHAT EXIT
WAS THAT SPA OFF OF?Copy !req
391. WHAT HAPPENED HERE?Copy !req
392. ding!Copy !req
393. HELLO?Copy !req
394. I NEED DIRECTIONS TO
SERENITY GARDEN DAY SPA.Copy !req
395. - OH, HELLO, MRS. MARTIN.Copy !req
396. I'LL TAKE YOU EXACTLY WHERE
YOU NEED TO GO.Copy !req
397. - MY OWN EMPLOYEE, MAKING ME
CAMPAIGN FOR YOUR SUPPORT,Copy !req
398. AND YOU CALL YOURSELF
A SYCOPHANT.Copy !req
399. - I'M ONLY LOOKING OUT
FOR YOUR BEST INTEREST.Copy !req
400. LOOK, THIS SAYS LINCOLN
LOST EIGHT ELECTIONSCopy !req
401. BEFORE HE WAS PRESIDENT.Copy !req
402. THINGS WORKED OUT WELL
FOR HIM.Copy !req
403. JUST HANG IN THERE.
THE ELECTION IS IN TWO DAYS.Copy !req
404. - I NEED TO KNOW NOW.Copy !req
405. CONOR, DO YOU WANT TO HAVE
THE ELECTION NOW?Copy !req
406. - WHAT ELECTION?Copy !req
407. OH, YEAH, SURE.Copy !req
408. - THOSE VOTING FOR THEMSELVES,
RAISE YOUR HANDS.Copy !req
409. WENDY, HOW DO YOU VOTE?Copy !req
410. - FINE, YOU WANT TO BACK ME
INTO A CORNER,Copy !req
411. I VOTE FOR...Copy !req
412. OH, COURTNEY, I COULD NEVER
GO AGAINST YOU.Copy !req
413. YOU WIN.
- YES!Copy !req
414. COURTNEY WINS BY A LANDSLIDE.Copy !req
415. - I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU.Copy !req
416. - HUH, THIS IS EITHER THE WORST
OR THE HIPPEST DAY SPACopy !req
417. I'VE EVER BEEN TO.Copy !req
418. HELLO?
NORTHSTAR?Copy !req
419. - WOW.Copy !req
420. WILL YOU LOOK AT THIS DISPLAY
OF OLD FORGOTTEN CARS?Copy !req
421. THE EDSEL,
THE TUCKER,Copy !req
422. THIS WAX FIGURE
OF RIC OCASEK.Copy !req
423. - EW.
IT'S ALL PALE AND GREASY.Copy !req
424. - HEY, I'M JUST TRYING TO ENJOY
THE MUSEUM WITH MY FAMILY.Copy !req
425. - THANK YOU FOR CALLING
DOMINO'S PIZZA.Copy !req
426. I'M KIDDING.
IT'S ME.Copy !req
427. - GLENN, YOU WON'T BELIEVE THIS.Copy !req
428. I'M STUCK IN THE MIDDLE
OF SOME JUNKYARD.Copy !req
429. NORTHSTAR GAVE ME THESE AWFUL
DIRECTIONS, AND I'M—Copy !req
430. - JUNKYARD?
JACKIE, GET OUT OF THERE NOW.Copy !req
431. NORTHSTAR IS TRYING TO—Copy !req
432. - NORTHSTAR IS WHAT?Copy !req
433. GLENN?
OH, I CAN'T HEAR YOU.Copy !req
434. IS THIS PART OF YOUR PIZZA JOKE?Copy !req
435. BECAUSE I'M NOT GOING TO SAY
I'M A MEAT LOVER.Copy !req
436. WAIT!Copy !req
437. WHAT'S GOING ON?Copy !req
438. HELP!
SOMEBODY HELP!Copy !req
439. - THAT'S RIGHT.
SHE GREW UP IN A JUNKYARD.Copy !req
440. BUT HOW AM I GOING TO FIND
WHICH ONE?Copy !req
441. - WELL, THERE'S THREE NEARBY.Copy !req
442. ANDERSON WRECKING,
"A" AND "B" SALVAGE,Copy !req
443. AND JUNK-IN-YOUR-TRUCK-YARD
OFF HIGHWAY 69.Copy !req
444. - I GOT A HUNCH
IT'S ANDERSON WRECKING.Copy !req
445. KIDS, LET'S GO.Copy !req
446. - BUT HOW?Copy !req
447. MOM'S GOT THE RV.Copy !req
448. AH!Copy !req
449. - I DON'T KNOW HOW TO READ
THIS STUPID THING.Copy !req
450. - COME ON, DAD.
YOU CAN DO IT.Copy !req
451. JUST FOCUS.Copy !req
452. - YOU CAN DO THIS, GLENN.Copy !req
453. HOLD ON, KIDS.
YOU TOO, MANNEQUIN.Copy !req
454. DADDY KNOWS THE WAY.Copy !req
455. - DR. MARTIN,
THIS IS A ONE-WAY STREET.Copy !req
456. - I KNOW.
IT SAID SO ON THE MAP.Copy !req
457. - HELP!Copy !req
458. - GOOD DOGGY.Copy !req
459. - HELLO, MRS. MARTIN.Copy !req
460. HOW MAY I ASSIST YOUCopy !req
461. TO DIE?Copy !req
462. - NORTHSTAR LADY?Copy !req
463. BOY, DO YOU GIVE LOUSY
DIRECTIONS.Copy !req
464. WAIT.
WHAT WAS THAT?Copy !req
465. - UGH!Copy !req
466. - OVER THERE!Copy !req
467. - YOU KIDS FIGURE OUT
HOW TO LOWER THAT THING.Copy !req
468. I'M GOING TO SAVE YOUR MOTHER.Copy !req
469. YOU,
YOU STAY HERE.Copy !req
470. - HOW DO YOU WORK THIS THING?Copy !req
471. - WE JUST NEED TO FIND
THE INSTRUCTIONS.Copy !req
472. - MADAM PRESIDENT,
WE HAVE A SITUATION.Copy !req
473. I FOUND THE INSTRUCTIONS.Copy !req
474. - AND?
- THEY'RE IN SPANISH.Copy !req
475. - OKAY, PEOPLE,
IF YOU HAVE A GOD,Copy !req
476. PRAY TO HIM NOW.Copy !req
477. - I'M COMING, HONEY.Copy !req
478. HOLD ON.Copy !req
479. - I WANT YOUR HUSBAND.Copy !req
480. THAT SEXY DULCET-TONED
ORAL SPECIALIST.Copy !req
481. - WHO? GLENN?Copy !req
482. - OPERATOR 386, YOUR SERVICES
ARE NO LONGER REQUIRED.Copy !req
483. HUH?Copy !req
484. - AGH!Copy !req
485. WHY WON'T YOU DIE?Copy !req
486. - GLENN, HELP!Copy !req
487. - AH!Copy !req
488. - HELP ME NOW, PLEASE!Copy !req
489. - SPANISH?Copy !req
490. UGH, IF ONLY WE PAID ATTENTIONCopy !req
491. WHEN MOM WAS TRYING TO TEACH US.Copy !req
492. - FROM NOW ON, I'LL ALWAYS
PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR MOMCopy !req
493. OR YOUR DAD'S NEXT WIFE.Copy !req
494. - PEOPLE, I ASSURE YOU,Copy !req
495. THE ANSWERS ARE IN THIS BOOK.Copy !req
496. - OF COURSE!Copy !req
497. - UGH!Copy !req
498. AH!Copy !req
499. OW!Copy !req
500. AH, NUTS.Copy !req
501. UGH!Copy !req
502. - GLENN, HURRY.Copy !req
503. - JACKIE!Copy !req
504. - I'M GLAD YOU'RE OKAY, MOM.Copy !req
505. - YEAH, ME TOO.Copy !req
506. - HEY, YOU KNOW, IT'S FUNNY.Copy !req
507. NORTHSTAR WAS SUPPOSED
TO GIVE ME DIRECTIONS,Copy !req
508. BUT INSTEAD THAT DUMPY LITTLE
BOX CAUSED ME TO LOSE MY WAY.Copy !req
509. - IT WAS MY FAULT TOO.Copy !req
510. I GOT SO WRAPPED UP
IN MY OWN PROBLEMSCopy !req
511. I NEGLECTED THE MAN
I LOVE MOST.Copy !req
512. - AW, HONEY, I'LL NEVER
HAVE EYES FOR ANYONE—Copy !req
513. HOLY SMOKES.Copy !req
514. SHE'S THE LEAST SMOKING-HOT
WOMAN I'VE EVER SEEN.Copy !req
515. - GLENN, WE CAN STILL
MAKE IT WORK.Copy !req
516. LOOK, I FILED MY TEETH DOWN
FOR YOU.Copy !req
517. NICE AND TINY.Copy !req
518. YOU SEE?
BABY TEETH.Copy !req
519. GOO-GOO.
GA-GA.Copy !req
520. BOO-BOO.
POO-POO.Copy !req
521. - DID YOU TELL HER
ABOUT MY MICRODONTIA?Copy !req
522. - OKAY, BOYS, LOCK HER UP.Copy !req
523. - ALL RIGHT, KIDS,
BREAK OUT YOUR MARACAS.Copy !req
524. TOMORROW WE'RE GOING
TO COLUMBIA...Copy !req
525. SOUTH CAROLINA.Copy !req
526. - ROGER THAT.
DUE WEST, IT IS.Copy !req
527. - EAST, GLENN.Copy !req
528. - I KNOW, I KNOW.
JUST TO TURN AROUND.Copy !req