Futurama 2x13

Directed by Susie Dietter

Leela meets Alkazar, who claims to be the only other remaining cyclops in the universe. But when Alkazar invites Leela back to his home planet and treats her like a slave, Fry suspects that something is amiss.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. WOW, I'M FINALLY GOING TO SEE

2. TV's ELZAR!

3. AH, THIS IS THE GREATEST NANOSECOND OF MY LIFE.

4. NO, THIS ONE IS.

5. NO, THIS ONE. WAIT...

6. THAT ONE WAS SLIGHTLY WORSE.

7. AH, SO FAR SO GOOD ON THIS ONE.

8. And now, here he is

9. chef, restaurateur, author of Cooking Slugs for Dinner

10. and Cooking Dinner for Slugs...

11. Elzar!

12. YAY!

13. ALL RIGHT! YEAH!

14. YEAH, BABY! WHOO!

15. ELZAR!

16. ELZAR, YOU'RE MY GOD.

17. I DREW OF YOU.

18. OH, ELZAR, BLESS YOU.

19. MMM— MMM—

20. UH— UH—

21. NOW, THIS IS WHY I PREFER YOUR NONSTICK ROBOTS.

22. OH.

23. ALL RIGHT! YEAH! WHOO!

24. ALL RIGHT, YEAH...

25. WHOO, WHOO.

26. HEY, I HOPE YOU FOLKS LIKE CAJUN FOOD...

27. HOO-WEE! 'CAUSE TODAY WE'RE MAKING

28. ELZAR'S DOWN-HOME NEPTUNE-STYLE GUMBO.

29. IN A POT OF DOWN-HOME, NEPTUNE-STYLE GUMBO.

30. BOILED? INTERESTING!

31. BENDER, PLEASE TRY TO BE A LITTLE QUIETER.

32. NO, Y SHUT UP.

33. OF COURSE, EVERY NOW AND THEN,

34. FROM YOUR SPICE WEASEL. BAM!

35. OH, YEAH! BAM IT AGAIN, ELZAR!

36. ANOTHER NOTCH.

37. GEEZ, WHO LET THIS GUY THROUGH THE METAL DETECTOR?

38. COME ON, YOU WIMP, WORK THAT WEASEL!

39. QUIT HOLDING OUT ON US!

40. TO STOP INTERRUPTING, ALL RIGHT.

41. AGAINST MY WILL, I'M GOING TO KNOCK IT UP ANOTHER NOTCH.

42. OOH, I GOT TO GET THIS NOTCH UP KNOCKING ON FILM.

43. HEY, ELZAR, THINK FAST!

44. WHA— HUH?

45. OH! MY EYE!

46. I'M BLIND!

47. BAM!

48. TELL ME, DOCTOR, HOW'S MY CYST?

49. GRANDE.

50. I DON'T LIKE THIS DOCTOR.

51. I BET I'VE LOST HE'S EVEN TREATED.

52. OKAY, WHAT DOES THIS LOOK LIKE TO YOU?

53. UM... A GRAYISH BLOB?

54. RIGHT. AND THIS ONE?

55. UM...

56. A GRAYISH BLOB?

57. NOT AS RIGHT THAT TIME.

58. SOME MILD CORNEAL IRRITATION.

59. NICE TRY, LITTLE BOY.

60. IN YOUR WHOLE CARAPACE.

61. YOU SEEM A BIT TENSE.

62. HERE, TRY THESE.

63. SURE, BUTTER ME UP WITH CANDY.

64. WELL, IT WON'T WORK, SONNY.

65. WHY ALWAYS THE FIGHTING?

66. SOME REST.

67. YOU'LL HAVE TO WEAR THIS PATCH FOR ABOUT A WEEK.

68. OH, A WEEK?

69. WHAT DO YOU THINK, DR. ZOIDBERG?

70. CLACK.

71. THANKS FOR THE HELP, LEELA.

72. LEELA, WE'RE RIGHT HERE!

73. I'M NOT DEAF. I JUST HAVE TO WEAR THIS STUPID EYE PATCH.

74. DOES IT LOOK STUPID?

75. NO.

76. IN FACT, IT-IT LOOKS SO NICE

77. I-I THINK I MIGHT GET ONE, TOO.

78. IT'S ELZAR AGAIN!

79. OH, MY GOD, I'M SO EXCITED, I WISH I COULD WET MY PANTS!

80. LEELA, PLEASE, LET ME MAKE THIS UP TO YOU.

81. TO MY RESTAURANT TONIGHT.

82. I'M GOING TO BAM YOU UP A DINNER YOU'LL NEVER FORGET.

83. ALL RIGHT!

84. OH, YEAH!

85. GREAT!

86. HOORAY FOR BLINDY!

87. OH, GOD... I'M COMING DOWN!

88. FOLKS, TELL THE NEIGHBORS

89. 'CAUSE YOUR TASTE BUDS ARE GOING ON VACATION.

90. SO DIG IN!

91. IT'S THE BIGGEST JAMAICAN PLATTER I'VE EVER SEEN!

92. JERK CHICKEN, JERK BEEF, JERK PORK.

93. THIS MAN CAN'T JERK?

94. THE KING CRAB IS TO DIE FOR.

95. LOOK— A TINY EDIBLE CROWN.

96. WHAT'S IT MADE OF?

97. WOOD.

98. MMM.

99. FRY, YOU GOT TO TRY THE STERNO NICOISE.

100. NO, THANKS. THAT'S ROBOT FOOD.

101. IT'S SO GOOD.

102. OH, JUST TRY A LITTLE.

103. NO, REALLY, I DON'T—

104. MMM.

105. OVER THERE, LEELA?

106. OH, YEAH. THIS SALAD'S FANTASTIC.

107. SO FRESH.

108. OH, MY. THAT STEAMED CARROT WAS A BIT SPICY FOR ME.

109. EVERYBODY ENJOY THEIR DINNER?

110. GOD, YES, ELZAR!

111. WELL, I SURE ENJOYED

112. AFTER-DINNER CHOCOLATES.

113. WHAT'S THIS UNDER THE CHOCOLATES?

114. YEAH, YOU TAKE CARE OF THAT WHENEVER YOU WANT.

115. HEY! WHAT?

116. A BILL?

117. YOU'RE CHARGING US AFTER YOU BLINDED ME?

118. HEY, I MADE YOU A NICE MEAL.

119. THIS AIN'T A CHARITY.

120. $1,200?

121. HOLY ZOMBIE JESUS!

122. WE DON'T HAVE

123. ESPECIALLY NOT ZOIDBERG.

124. THEY TOOK AWAY MY CREDIT CARDS.

125. OKAY, OKAY, WAIT.

126. I KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE OF THIS, NO PROBLEM.

127. ARE UNDER ARREST.

128. IT'S A STONE-COLD SHAME.

129. HE'S MAKING A BREAK FOR IT! GET HIM!

130. NO, NO, I-I WAS JUST PICKING MY NOSE.

131. HE'S PICKING HIS NOSE! GET HIM!

132. THE OLD DINE-AND-DASH, EH?

133. MY DADDY OWNED A RESTAURANT, AND IT'S PUNKS LIKE YOU

134. FROM GOING REGIONAL.

135. THAT'S WHY I BECAME A COP.

136. NOW IT'S PAYBACK TIME. AW, YEAH.

137. PLEASE DON'T HIT ME— I'M BRITTLE!

138. HEY, WAIT A SECOND.

139. I'VE GOT THE PERFECT SOLUTION.

140. LISTEN TO THE SMART ROBOT.

141. I LOVE COOKING, AND ELZAR'S ASS LOVES GETTING KISSED, RIGHT?

142. NO QUESTION.

143. SO, HOW ABOUT I WORK PART-TIME

144. TO PAY OFF OUR DEBT?

145. I DON'T KNOW.

146. A LITTLE LESS UNBEARABLE.

147. OH, BENDER'S A MODEL EMPLOYEE.

148. HE'S SO POLITE.

149. AND HARDWORKING.

150. HE'S MADE OF CANDY.

151. OKAY, FINE, I'LL GIVE IT A SHOT.

152. HOT DIGGITY!

153. YOUR NOSE CLEAN.

154. THAT'LL BE EASY. I NEVER WEAR THE DAMN THING.

155. AH, TIME FOR MY PRECIOUS 10:00 A.M. MEETING.

156. IS LEELA?

157. I'M HERE, AND I'M FINE, THANK YOU.

158. TODAY THAN USUAL.

159. FOR SOME REASON.

160. LEELA, A LITTLE HELP EMBARRASSED ABOUT.

161. LIKE, MAYBE I COULD DO YOUR MAKEUP.

162. I DON'T NEED HELP.

163. FOR YOUR INFORMATION, I DID THIS ALL BY MYSELF.

164. YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL!

165. INCIDENTALLY, MY FAVORITE ARTIST IS PICASSO.

166. WELL, I'M OFF TO WORK AT THE RESTAURANT.

167. FOR ME WHILE I'M GONE.

168. BETTER YET, I'LL BUILD SOMEONE TO FILL IN FOR YOU.

169. AS BLACK AS COAL.

170. WELL, IF THAT NEW GUY CAN'T HANDLE THINGS, GIVE ME A CALL.

171. I'M DONE SIPHONING OUT THE GREASE TRAP.

172. I THINK I NEED A MINT.

173. SO, UH, WHAT JOB DO I MOVE UP TO?

174. PASTRY CHEF? SAUCIER? SOUP GUY?

175. BAM!

176. YEAH... BAM YOURSELF.

177. HEY, WHO ARE THEY?

178. LET'S JUST SAY THEY'RE VERY GOOD CUSTOMERS

179. AND I'M NOT ANSWERING ANY MORE QUESTIONS.

180. THE ROBOT MAFIA? YES.

181. YOU CALL THIS A TABLE?

182. YOU CALL THIS A TABLE?

183. I WOULDN'T HIT A GUY OVER THE HEAD WITH THIS TABLE.

184. YOU HEAR THAT?

185. THE DON-BOT DON'T LIKE IT.

186. I OUGHT TO CLAMP YOU!

187. YOU WANT TO BE CLAMPED?

188. WHOA, WHOA, CALM DOWN, CLAMPS.

189. THE BOSS, HE LIKES A WALL

190. CAN BE PUT AGAINST...

191. SUCH AS LIKE THIS THERE.

192. BUT THAT TABLE'S

193. AH, LET ME BUS THAT FOR YOU GENTLEMEN.

194. NO. WHAT I MEANT TO DO WAS—

195. I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.

196. AND GET OUT!

197. HMM, I LIKE THIS GUY'S LACK OF STYLE.

198. SO'S I FINALLY GIVE THIS GUY

199. A PAIR OF CEMENT SHOES,

200. 'CAUSE THEY'RE LIGHTER THAN HIS LEAD ONES.

201. HEY, YOU THINK THIS COMPUTES OVER HERE?

202. WHERE'S ALL MY CHANGE? I GAVE YOU A 100.

203. NO, YOU GAVE ME A 50.

204. OH, NO, I DIDN'T. YEAH, YOU DID.

205. HEY, YOU TRYING TO STEAL FROM THE DON-BOT?

206. I'M TRYING, BUT HE'S NOT MAKING IT EASY.

207. ON THIS GUY, HUH?

208. I LIKE YOU, KID.

209. HERE'S SOMETHING FOR YOUR TROUBLE.

210. IT'S MONEY.

211. WOW, THANKS.

212. HEY, YOU EARNED THAT 50 BUCKS.

213. YOU GAVE ME A 20.

214. I DID? OH, I'M SORRY.

215. I MEANT— HEY, WAIT A MINUTE.

216. ABOUT YOU.

217. SAY, YOU WANT TO WORK FOR ME AS A HIRED GOON?

218. ARE YOU KIDDING?

219. I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO BREAK INTO GOONING.

220. HEY, ELZAR, I QUIT!

221. 'KAY!

222. WE'RE GOING TO TRY YOU OUT WITH A LITTLE DELIVERY JOB.

223. IT'S FOR A, UH, PRIVATE LOTTERY THAT WE RUN.

224. WOW! YOU GUYS RUN NUMBERS?

225. WELL, NOTHING FANCY— YOU KNOW, ONES AND ZEROS MOSTLY.

226. "THE MECHANICAL BULL" GRAVANO

227. AND WATCH OUT FOR THE COPS.

228. THAT'S JUST WHAT MY MOM USED TO TELL ME.

229. WHOO!

230. THAT'S SOME FINE OIL-ADE, SON.

231. IN THE ROBOT MAFIA...

232. WHICH I'M SORT OF IN.

233. YOU FLATTER ME, KIND GOON

234. BUT I'M ONLY PROGRAMMED

235. LIKE ON THE SIGN HERE.

236. AW, CRAP.

237. THE COPS.

238. SEEN ANY SUSPICIOUS ACTIVITY?

239. NOPE, BUT CHECK OUT TODAY'S "MARMADUKE."

240. SOLID.

241. HEY, IT'S THAT SKEL FROM ELZAR'S.

242. IN PROGRESS...

243. BABY.

244. GOTCHA!

245. THE PROBLEM, OFFICERS?

246. WAS I SPEEDING?

247. WE'LL DECIDE WHAT

248. AFTER AN ILLEGAL SEARCH.

249. HE'S CLEAN.

250. SMELLS NICE, TOO.

251. BETTER THAN ME? AW, YEAH.

252. COURTESY OF MR. BENDER.

253. NICE JOB, BENDER.

254. YOU PASSED THE TEST.

255. YOU WANT TO JOIN ME,

256. AT OUR, UH, SOCIAL CLUB TOMORROW NIGHT?

257. UH, I'D RATHER PLAN SOME FELONIES.

258. OH. THEN WE SHOULD MEET AT OUR MAFIA CRIME HEADQUARTERS.

259. DON-BOT, I BEG YOU.

260. I CAN'T MAKE THIS WEEK'S LOAN PAYMENT.

261. AND OPEN YOUR "MERCY" FILE.

262. FILE NOT FOUND.

263. LET THAT BE A WARNING TO YOU.

264. THANK YOU, DON-BOT.

265. CLAMPS, DONNIE B.

266. HEY, LISTEN, BENDER,

267. BUT, UH, WE NEED SOME MUSCLE.

268. A LITTLE OF THIS, HUH?

269. HO-HO-HO! THIS GUY'S AN OX.

270. HE'S GOT OXEN-LIKE STRENGTH.

271. HEY, HE NEEDS A NICKNAME, RIGHT?

272. LET'S CALL HIM "CLAMPS."

273. CLAMPS?

274. THAT'S MY NAME, YOU NUMSKULL!

275. DON'T MAKE ME CLAMP YOU ONE!

276. HOW ABOUT BLOTTO?

277. IT'S GRITTY, IT'S GOT STREET-CRED

278. PLUS, I CAN KEEP MY MONOGRAMMED SLIPPERS.

279. GOOD THINKING. HEY!

280. NOW, THIS SCORE AIN'T GONNA BE

281. IN THE TEA PARK, ALL RIGHT?

282. THERE MAY BE SOME DEATH-KILLING.

283. IT'S GOING TO BE CLAMP THIS, CLAMP THAT

284. BADDA-CLIMP, BADDA-CLAMP.

285. WHAT DO YOU THINK, BLOTTO? YOU IN?

286. IT'S FUNNY.

287. UNTIL NOW, I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE A GANGSTER.

288. SO THE ANSWER'S YES.

289. HEY, HEY, WAY TO GO, WAY TO BE, WAY TO SHOOT.

290. NOW, SINCE WE'LL

291. WHICH MAY BE AGAINST THE LAW, I SUGGEST YOU HAVE AN ALIBI.

292. AN ALIBI, HUH?

293. I DON'T FEEL GOOD.

294. I'M GENUINELY SICK.

295. BUT WE'RE ABOUT TO TAKE OFF.

296. WE GOT TO EAT OUR BLAST-OFF SUNDAES.

297. I CAN'T MOVE.

298. Oh, I think I'm going to output.

299. OKAY, YOU STAY IN BED.

300. I'LL EAT YOURS.

301. BENDER'S SICK.

302. HMM, NEED ANY HELP TAKING OFF?

303. I'M FINE, THANK YOU.

304. NAVIGATE BY FEEL ALONE.

305. THAT'S COMING OUT OF YOUR PAY.

306. OF TRADITIONAL ROBOT COOKING?

307. HIGH-QUALITY OIL.

308. THEN EAT IT.

309. SO, UH, WHAT'S THIS BIG SCORE ANYWAY?

310. WE'RE HEISTING A SHIPMENT OF ZUBAN CIGARS.

311. ZUBANS? THOSE ARE THE FINEST CIGARS IN THE UNIVERSE.

312. WITH ONE OF THOSE THINGS.

313. YO, THERE'S OUR PIGEON NOW.

314. LET'S SHOOT BULLETS OUT OF OUR GUNS.

315. ALL RIGHT, HERE'S THE BATTLE PLAN.

316. WE SHOOT, THEY SURRENDER,

317. AND GO HOME.

318. KILLING ANYONE.

319. THIS GANG'S GOT SOME FRESH, NEW IDEAS.

320. I ADMIRE THAT.

321. OH, WE'LL KILL THEM, ALL RIGHT.

322. HEAVILY OUT-CLAMPED.

323. THEY WON'T KNOW WHAT CLAMPED THEM!

324. - s - y

325. WOW, IT'S TOO BAD YOU CAN'T SEE, LEELA

326. 'CAUSE THERE'S SHOOTING AT SOMEBODY.

327. WHOA! WHOA!

328. I'M TAKING EVASIVE ACTION.

329. UH, LEELA?

330. STOP BOTHERING ME, FRY.

331. I NEED FULL CONCENTRATION.

332. EYESIGHT IS FOR CHUMPS.

333. SHOWS ME NO RESPECT.

334. HEY, BLOTTO, ROLL DOWN THE WINDOW AND START SHOOTING.

335. UM— OH, UH—

336. OOH, HE GOT ME!

337. OH! WHAT A SHOT THAT GUY IS.

338. WAIT, WHY DO THE RAISED LETTERS

339. THAT NORMALLY SAY "TURN MASTER STEERING WHEEL COMPANY"

340. SAY "NIBBLER"?

341. OH, NO!

342. I'm back at the wheel, Fry.

343. Everything's under control.

344. GREAT, GREAT.

345. TO BUY FLIGHT INSURANCE.

346. AAH! THEY'RE COMING OUR PROXIMITY!

347. THEM THE CLAMPS, CLAMPS.

348. GEE, YOU THINK?

349. AT EVERY OPPORTUNITY?

350. YOU'RE A FREAKIN' GENIUS, YOU IDIOT!

351. THE ENGINE'S STALLED.

352. I'M TRYING THE MANUAL FUEL PUMP.

353. HELLO, WE'RE THE ROBOT MAFIA—

354. THE ENTIRE ROBOT MAFIA.

355. WE'RE HERE TO STEAL YOUR CIGARS.

356. YOU'LL NEVER GET AWAY WITH THIS.

357. LET US LIVE.

358. THEN YOU'LL GET OFF SCOT-FREE.

359. JOEY, CLAMPS...

360. BEFORE THEY SEE US SOME MORE.

361. HEY, BOSS

362. BEAT US TO IT.

363. I'LL ASSUME THAT'S A JOKE AT M EXPENSE.

364. WELL, WHO'S LAUGHING NOW?

365. HEE-YA! OOH!

366. HEY, WHERE'S BLOTTO?

367. LEARNING THE TRADE.

368. SORRY I'M TARDY, OLD BEAN.

369. TASTY WATERCRESS SANDWICH.

370. HEY, HE'S MORE CLASSY THAN I REALIZED.

371. TIE UP THE PRISONERS.

372. CAPITAL IDEA, OLD SPORT.

373. I SAY, GET THE HELL OFF ME.

374. FAMILIAR.

375. OOF!

376. MY WORD, WHAT HAVE WE—

377. NOTHING TO SEE HERE, OLD GIRL.

378. HEY, BOSS,

379. ON THIS CREW HERE.

380. ALL RIGHT, I WANT YOU

381. THEN UNPLUG HIM.

382. NO!

383. THE CLAMPS!

384. HUH?

385. UH, WAIT...

386. OLD SPICE.

387. UH, LET ME HAVE A GO AT THIS MECHANIZED CHAP.

388. I CAN BE QUITE THE ROUGH CUSTOMER.

389. OH, NO, POOR BENDER.

390. I DON'T FEEL GOOD.

391. CHEW ON THIS!

392. WHAT-HO!

393. TAKE THAT, YOU TWIT!

394. NO, STOP IT!

395. THAT'S THE LAST OF THEM.

396. ALL RIGHT, NOW, LET'S MAFIA THINGS UP A BIT.

397. JOEY, BURN DOWN THE SHIP.

398. CLAMPS, BURN DOWN THE CREW.

399. UH, DONNIE, BABY

400. A CHANCE HERE, HUH?

401. YOUSE GUYS SKEDADDLE.

402. OF THE DOITY WOIK.

403. HEY, I LIKE

404. LATEST ACCENT.

405. OF CLAMPS, HUH?

406. CLAMPS, CLAMPS, CLAMPS.

407. PHEW.

408. LEELA, WE MAY NOT HAVE

409. SO LET'S SPEND ALL OF IT REMINISCING ABOUT BENDER.

410. THAT RAN ON MAGIC.

411. HELP! HELP!

412. BENDER.

413. YOU'RE OKAY.

414. YES, I AM,

415. REGAINED CONSCIOUSNESS.

416. I'VE GOT AN IDEA. HOLD STILL.

417. IT'S ABOUT TO BREAK.

418. YES! YES!

419. ALL RIGHT!

420. YAY! YEAH, IT BROKE, ALL RIGHT.

421. I'M TELLING YOU—

422. LEELA WAS COOL,

423. PEOPLE, IT HURT.

424. IT REALL HURT.

425. WELL, THIS IS THE BIG MOMENT.

426. IT'S FINALLY TIME TO TAKE MY EYE PATCH OFF.

427. I'LL HANDLE THE SNIPPING.

428. AFTER ALL, I DO HAVE THE PROPER EQUIPMENT.

429. I THINK IT'S BLOTTO—

430. WHEN MY PATCH FELL OFF.

431. PROFESSOR?

432. AT 10:00 P.M. LAST NIGHT?

433. WHERE AM I NOW?

434. CHILD TO KILL ME.

435. WELL, I'M NOT GOING OUT WITHOUT A FIGHT. HEE-YA!

436. FINE KICK, SIR, BUT I'M ACTUALLY HERE

437. FROM THE CIGAR HEIST.

438. OH, SWEET LEGAL TENDER.

439. KID, TELL THE DON-BOT I'M QUITTING ORGANIZED CRIME.

440. FROM NOW ON, I'LL STICK TO THE REGULAR KIND.

441. UH, IT'S FUNNY, BENDER.

442. REALLY WENT ON UP THERE.

443. I'LL TELL YOU THE WHOLE STORY.

444. AND MAYBE SOMEDAY, I WON'T LISTEN.