1. This is pretty much
what's happened so far.
Copy !req
2. Ross was in love
with Rachel since forever.
Copy !req
3. Every time he tried to tell her,
something got in the way...
Copy !req
4. like cats, Italian guys.
Copy !req
5. And finally, Chandler was,
like, "Forget about her."
Copy !req
6. When Ross was in China, Chandler
let it slip that Ross loved Rachel.
Copy !req
7. She was, like, "Oh, my God!"
Copy !req
8. So she went to the airport to meet him.
Copy !req
9. She didn't know Ross was getting
off the plane with another woman.
Copy !req
10. That's pretty much everything
you need to know.
Copy !req
11. But enough about us.
How have you been?
Copy !req
12. The One With Ross' New Girlfriend
Copy !req
13. Flight number 457
from Beijing now arriving.
Copy !req
14. Oh, my God!
Copy !req
15. Oh, my God!
Copy !req
16. Excuse me.
Copy !req
17. Move, move, move!
Emergency, please!
Copy !req
18. Excuse me, excuse me.
Copy !req
19. There you are!
Copy !req
20. So, so...
Copy !req
21. How was China? You!
Copy !req
22. It was great.
Copy !req
23. What happened?
Copy !req
24. - You're bleeding.
- I am?
Copy !req
25. Oh, look at that! Yes, I am.
Copy !req
26. Enough about me,
Mr. Back From The Orient!
Copy !req
27. Come on, I wanna hear everything!
Everything!
Copy !req
28. Well, where do I start?
Copy !req
29. This is Julie.
Julie, this is Rachel.
Copy !req
30. These are...
Copy !req
31. These are...
Copy !req
32. aren't for you.
Copy !req
33. These are for you.
Copy !req
34. Welcome to our country.
Copy !req
35. Thank you. I'm from New York.
Copy !req
36. No problem. We'll use them
to stop the bleeding.
Copy !req
37. Baggage claim?
Copy !req
38. I'm telling U. She went to the airport,
and she's gonna go for it with Ross.
Copy !req
39. Oh, my God! This is huge!
Copy !req
40. This is bigger than huge.
This is...
Copy !req
41. All right, what's bigger than huge?
Copy !req
42. This?
Copy !req
43. Guys, you got new haircuts!
Copy !req
44. Yes, we did.
Thanks to Vidal Buffay.
Copy !req
45. Because, you know, "if you don't
look good, we don't look good."
Copy !req
46. I love that voice!
Copy !req
47. And the winner is Eva Godna!
Copy !req
48. Airport. Airport. Ross.
Copy !req
49. Not alone.
Copy !req
50. Julie.
Copy !req
51. Arm around her!
Copy !req
52. Cramp! Cramp! Cramp!
Copy !req
53. I think she's trying
to tell us something.
Copy !req
54. Quick, get the verbs.
Copy !req
55. You! You!
Copy !req
56. You said he liked me!
Copy !req
57. You!
Copy !req
58. You slowpokes!
Copy !req
59. That's all right.
We got the bags.
Copy !req
60. This is my sister, Monica.
Copy !req
61. This is Chandler.
Copy !req
62. Phoebe, hi.
Copy !req
63. Joey.
Copy !req
64. Everyone, this is Julie.
Copy !req
65. Julie.
Copy !req
66. But I'm not here,
you haven't met me.
Copy !req
67. I'll make a better impression when
I don't have 20 hours of plane on me.
Copy !req
68. - And bus.
- Oh, my God!
Copy !req
69. - With the screaming guy
- And the spitting.
Copy !req
70. You gotta hear this story.
Copy !req
71. We're on this bus
that's 200 years old.
Copy !req
72. Two hundred, at least.
Copy !req
73. And the chicken poops in her lap!
Copy !req
74. I'm so sorry.
Copy !req
75. I just gave away the ending, didn't l?
Copy !req
76. I just heard this story in the cab...
Copy !req
77. and it is all I can think about.
Copy !req
78. This is amazing.
Copy !req
79. How did this happen?
Copy !req
80. We were in grad school together.
Copy !req
81. We haven't seen each other since then.
I land in China...
Copy !req
82. guess who's in charge of the dig?
Copy !req
83. Julie!
Copy !req
84. Isn't that great?
Copy !req
85. Isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch,
spit-on-your-neck fantastic?
Copy !req
86. It's an expression.
Copy !req
87. We just wanted to say a quick hi.
Copy !req
88. - Then we'll see the baby.
- Then get some sleep.
Copy !req
89. It's 6:00 tomorrow night, our time.
Copy !req
90. Don't tell us what's gonna happen.
I like being surprised.
Copy !req
91. Bye!
Copy !req
92. - Can I get some coffee?
- Sure.
Copy !req
93. - Did you talk to him yet?
- No.
Copy !req
94. Then, no.
Copy !req
95. What the hell happened to you in China?
Copy !req
96. When last we left you,
you were in love with, you know.
Copy !req
97. I know I was.
Copy !req
98. But there was always this voice
inside that kept saying:
Copy !req
99. "It's never gonna happen. Move on."
You know whose voice that was?
Copy !req
100. God?
Copy !req
101. It was you, pal.
Copy !req
102. Maybe it was God doing me.
Copy !req
103. You were right. She looks at me
and sees a friend. That's all.
Copy !req
104. And then I met Julie...
Copy !req
105. and we're having a great time.
Copy !req
106. I never would have gone for it,
if it hadn't been for you.
Copy !req
107. Well, you owe me one, big guy.
Copy !req
108. Your lemonade.
Copy !req
109. I didn't order it.
Copy !req
110. Then go take that back.
They'll charge you for that.
Copy !req
111. Go, go, go! Come on, come on!
Copy !req
112. So what did you find out?
Copy !req
113. He said...
Copy !req
114. He said...
Copy !req
115. They're having a great time.
Copy !req
116. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
117. But the silver lining,
if you wanna see it...
Copy !req
118. is that he made this decision
all by himself...
Copy !req
119. without any outside help whatsoever.
Copy !req
120. How is that a silver lining?
Copy !req
121. You have to really wanna see it.
Copy !req
122. Ironically, these guys
were picked last in gym.
Copy !req
123. Hey, Pheebs.
Copy !req
124. You know what I'm thinking?
Copy !req
125. How...
Copy !req
126. it's been so long
since you've had sex...
Copy !req
127. you're wondering
if they've changed it?
Copy !req
128. No. Although now
that's what I'm thinking.
Copy !req
129. So what were you thinking?
Copy !req
130. You gave the guys great haircuts.
I thought you'd like to do mine.
Copy !req
131. No.
Copy !req
132. Why not?
Copy !req
133. Because I'm just...
Copy !req
134. I'm incredibly anal and
an unbelievable control freak.
Copy !req
135. No, you're not.
Copy !req
136. I know I'm not, but you are.
Copy !req
137. I was trying to spare your feelings.
Copy !req
138. Hold on.
Copy !req
139. Ross, Julie for you.
Copy !req
140. Anybody know a good tailor?
Copy !req
141. You need clothes altered?
Copy !req
142. No, I'm just looking for a man
to draw on me with chalk.
Copy !req
143. Go see Frankie. My family's
been going to him forever.
Copy !req
144. He did my first suit when I was 15.
Copy !req
145. No, wait, 16.
Copy !req
146. No, excuse me, 15.
Copy !req
147. All right, when was 1990?
Copy !req
148. You have to stop the Q-Tip
when there's resistance!
Copy !req
149. Sweetheart, I'll see you later.
Copy !req
150. Okay, bye.
Copy !req
151. That is so sweet.
Copy !req
152. Okay. No, you hang up.
Copy !req
153. No, you
Copy !req
154. One, two, three.
Copy !req
155. You didn't hang up either.
Copy !req
156. She didn't hang up.
Copy !req
157. No, you hang up.
Copy !req
158. You. You.
Copy !req
159. Sorry, I thought
you were talking to me.
Copy !req
160. Rachel.
Copy !req
161. I'll just call her back.
Copy !req
162. Hi, sweetie. I'm sorry.
We got disconnected.
Copy !req
163. No, you hang up.
Copy !req
164. How did this happen to me?
Copy !req
165. A week ago, two weeks ago, I was fine.
Copy !req
166. Ross was just Ross. Just this guy.
Copy !req
167. Now all of a sudden, he's Ross...
Copy !req
168. this really great guy
that I can't have.
Copy !req
169. Sweetie, I wanted you to have him too.
Copy !req
170. I know you did.
Copy !req
171. I'm just gonna deal with it.
Copy !req
172. I gotta get out of here!
Copy !req
173. I don't care what you guys say,
something's bothering her.
Copy !req
174. You know, I think I was 16.
Copy !req
175. Please, just a little bit off the back.
Copy !req
176. I'm still on "no."
Copy !req
177. Morning.
Copy !req
178. Could you close your eyes for a sec?
Copy !req
179. No, no, no. I'm not
falling for that again.
Copy !req
180. What's going on?
Copy !req
181. I sort of did a stupid thing last night.
Copy !req
182. What stupid thing did you do?
Copy !req
183. Why don't you just go get dressed...
Copy !req
184. then you'll be on your way.
Bye-bye.
Copy !req
185. How did this happen?
Copy !req
186. I kind of ran into him last night.
Copy !req
187. - Where?
- At his apartment.
Copy !req
188. Is this juice?
Copy !req
189. And the fact that you dumped him
because he hit on Phoebe?
Copy !req
190. Oh, God, I know.
I'm pathetic, I'm a loser.
Copy !req
191. Honey, you're not pathetic.
You're just sad.
Copy !req
192. People do stupid things
when they're upset.
Copy !req
193. My God, if I had a nickel
for every guy I wish I hadn't
Copy !req
194. But this is about your horrible mistake.
Copy !req
195. Sorry we're late.
Copy !req
196. We were...
Copy !req
197. Well, there was touching.
Copy !req
198. Hey, Ross!
Copy !req
199. What a...
Copy !req
200. What are you doing here?
Copy !req
201. I do Raquel!
Copy !req
202. So he's back?
Copy !req
203. Yeah, he's back.
Is that a problem?
Copy !req
204. No, not a problem.
Copy !req
205. Good. Glad it's not a problem.
Copy !req
206. You're gonna have to not touch my ass.
Copy !req
207. Despite the yummy bagels
and palpable tension...
Copy !req
208. my pants need to be altered.
Copy !req
209. When you see Frankie,
tell him Joey Tribbiani says hello.
Copy !req
210. He'll know what it means.
Copy !req
211. You sure he'll crack that code?
Copy !req
212. It's funny. The last time Paolo
was here, my hair was so much cuter.
Copy !req
213. All right.
Copy !req
214. But you have to promise that you
will not be all controlly and bossy...
Copy !req
215. and all Monica about it.
Copy !req
216. I promise.
Copy !req
217. All right, let's see.
Copy !req
218. Now, some of you are gonna get cut
and some of you aren't.
Copy !req
219. But I promise, none of you
will feel a thing.
Copy !req
220. - That's it. I quit.
- What? I didn't say anything!
Copy !req
221. But this isn't the face of
a person who trusts a person.
Copy !req
222. This is the face of
a person who, you know...
Copy !req
223. doesn't trust a person.
Copy !req
224. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
225. It's just a little shorter
than what we had discussed.
Copy !req
226. Would you relax?
I know what I am doing.
Copy !req
227. This is how he wears it.
Copy !req
228. How who wears it?
Copy !req
229. Demi Moore.
Copy !req
230. Demi Moore is not a "he."
Copy !req
231. Well, he was a "he"
in Arthur and in 10.
Copy !req
232. That's Dudley Moore!
Copy !req
233. I said I wanted it like Demi Moore!
Copy !req
234. Oh, my God!
Copy !req
235. Oh, God!
Copy !req
236. Oh, my God! I'm sorry!
Copy !req
237. Which one is Demi Moore?
Copy !req
238. She's the actress that was in
Disclosure, Indecent Proposal, Ghost!
Copy !req
239. She's got gorgeous hair.
Copy !req
240. I know!
Copy !req
241. How long do you want the cuffs?
Copy !req
242. At least as long as I have the pants.
Copy !req
243. I just got that.
Copy !req
244. Now we'll do your inseam.
Copy !req
245. How is she?
Copy !req
246. It's too soon to tell.
Copy !req
247. She's resting, which is a good sign.
Copy !req
248. How's the hair?
Copy !req
249. I'm not gonna lie to you.
It doesn't look good.
Copy !req
250. I put a clip on one side, which seems
to have stopped the curling.
Copy !req
251. Can we see her?
Copy !req
252. Your hair looks too good.
It'd upset her.
Copy !req
253. Ross, you come on in.
Copy !req
254. Well, how you doing?
Copy !req
255. I'm okay.
Copy !req
256. That bad, huh?
Copy !req
257. Look, I can sense when women
are depressed and vulnerable.
Copy !req
258. It's one of my gifts.
Copy !req
259. Joey, when I saw him
get off that plane with her...
Copy !req
260. I really thought
I just hit rock bottom.
Copy !req
261. But today, it's like
there's rock bottom...
Copy !req
262. 50 feet of crap...
Copy !req
263. then me.
Copy !req
264. Tell Ross how you feel.
Copy !req
265. Come on, how can I just tell him?
What about Julie?
Copy !req
266. What about her? They've only
been going out for two weeks.
Copy !req
267. Ross has been in love
with you for 10 years.
Copy !req
268. I don't know. I don't know.
Copy !req
269. I've been with my share of women.
Copy !req
270. I've been with a lot
of people's share of women.
Copy !req
271. But the point is...
Copy !req
272. I've never felt about anyone
the way Ross felt about you.
Copy !req
273. Really?
Copy !req
274. Yo, paisan!
Copy !req
275. Can I talk to you for a sec?
Copy !req
276. Your tailor...
Copy !req
277. is a very bad man!
Copy !req
278. What are you talking about?
Copy !req
279. Hey, what's going on?
Copy !req
280. Joey's tailor...
Copy !req
281. took advantage of me.
Copy !req
282. No way! I've been going
to the guy for 12 years.
Copy !req
283. He said he was gonna do my inseam.
Copy !req
284. Then he ran his hand up my leg
and then there was definite
Copy !req
285. What?
Copy !req
286. Cupping.
Copy !req
287. That's how they do pants!
Copy !req
288. First they go up one side,
they move it over.
Copy !req
289. Then they go up the other side,
move it back, then they do the rear.
Copy !req
290. Ross, tell him. Isn't that
how a tailor measures pants?
Copy !req
291. Yes, yes, it is.
In prison!
Copy !req
292. What's the matter with you?
Copy !req
293. What?
Copy !req
294. That's not?
Copy !req
295. Oh, my God!
Copy !req
296. Even Mary Tyler Moore
would've been better.
Copy !req
297. I like it.
Copy !req
298. I do. I think it's a 10!
Copy !req
299. Thank you.
Copy !req
300. My hair is very amused.
Copy !req
301. Come on, things could be worse.
Copy !req
302. You could "get caught between
the moon and New York City.
Copy !req
303. I know it's crazy, but it's true."
Copy !req
304. Thank you.
Copy !req
305. Well, I gotta go. Bye.
Copy !req
306. Bye, Rach!
Copy !req
307. Wait, are you leaving?
Copy !req
308. That's what I meant by "bye."
Copy !req
309. Can I talk to you for a sec?
Copy !req
310. When the doctor does
that hernia test...
Copy !req
311. That's okay.
Copy !req
312. What's going on?
Copy !req
313. Well, okay, first of all...
Copy !req
314. Paolo and I are not back together.
Copy !req
315. That was a stupid thing I did.
Copy !req
316. If I could go back in time
and do it again...
Copy !req
317. well, I wouldn't.
Copy !req
318. Second of all...
Copy !req
319. What?
Copy !req
320. Is this one of those things
where you break up with a guy...
Copy !req
321. I tell you what I think...
Copy !req
322. and the next day
you get back together with him...
Copy !req
323. and I look like
a complete idiot?
Copy !req
324. Well, then, I think the guy's scum.
Copy !req
325. I hate him. I mean, I actually
I physically hate him.
Copy !req
326. I always have.
Copy !req
327. And you are way too good
to be with a guy like that.
Copy !req
328. Really?
Copy !req
329. You deserve to be with someone
who appreciates you...
Copy !req
330. and who gets how funny...
Copy !req
331. and sweet and amazing...
Copy !req
332. and adorable and sexy you are.
Copy !req
333. You know? Someone who wakes up
every morning thinking:
Copy !req
334. "Oh, my God. I'm with Rachel!"
Copy !req
335. You know? Someone
who makes you feel good.
Copy !req
336. Like the way I do with Julie.
Copy !req
337. Was there a "second of all"?
Copy !req
338. No, I think that was the whole "all."
Copy !req
339. I gotta go.
Copy !req
340. Thanks.
Copy !req
341. No, I swear to God, Dad!
Copy !req
342. That's not how they measure pants!
Copy !req
343. I was thinking of doing it shorter,
like Andie MacDowell's haircut.
Copy !req
344. - Yeah, I could do that.
- Really?
Copy !req
345. - You wanna do it now?
- Great!
Copy !req
346. See you.
Copy !req
347. I just wanna make
really sure this time.
Copy !req
348. Andie MacDowell is the girl from
Four Weddings and a Funeral, right?
Copy !req
349. No.
Copy !req
350. That's Roddy McDowall.
Copy !req
351. Andie MacDowell is the guy
from Planet of the Apes.
Copy !req
352. - Thank you.
- You're welcome.
Copy !req