1. Hey, those are
for my French class!
Copy !req
2. Oh, but I love sprinkles.
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3. Fine.
Just eat it.
Copy !req
4. Hey,
I'm really hungry, too.
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5. Please?
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6. Just take
the plain, okay?
Copy !req
7. Oh, thank you.
Copy !req
8. - Oh.
- Ah!
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9. People are walking
here, okay?
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10. God!
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11. Now they're dirty.
So just eat them.
Copy !req
12. - Here.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
13. What?
What's your problem?
Copy !req
14. My problem
is your face, dirtbag.
Copy !req
15. What's wrong with her?
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16. Ricky dumped her
this morning.
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17. I don't know,
she's on the warpath.
Copy !req
18. Well, if she's
looking for new customers,
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19. I'm up
for a test drive.
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20. Shut up, Daniel.
Copy !req
21. Karen, wait up!
Copy !req
22. Jeez, Perry,
you're looking huge.
Copy !req
23. Yeah? Well, I been
workin' out after school.
Copy !req
24. Ooh!
Sorry, little guy.
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25. I didn't see ya.
You all right, pal? Huh?
Copy !req
26. - Yeah.
- All right.
Copy !req
27. - Hey, you okay?
- I can't breathe.
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28. Nice guy hit you
in the solar plexus.
Copy !req
29. Fellas,
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30. my brother sent me
this amazing chem set.
Copy !req
31. I propose after school,
we make some acid,
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32. pour it on the sidewalk,
and watch it kill bugs.
Copy !req
33. What are you doing?
Copy !req
34. That's my locker.
Copy !req
35. Oh, I'm sorry.
Copy !req
36. I didn't know.
I thought it was mine.
Copy !req
37. See? This is mine.
Copy !req
38. I just got hit
in the solar plexus,
Copy !req
39. so I'm a little
out of it.
Copy !req
40. Yeah, I don't wanna hear
your life story, okay?
Copy !req
41. I want you
to move your ass!
Copy !req
42. Hey, Karen,
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43. was this guy trying
to break into your locker?
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44. No! No!
I was just confused.
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45. You know, I thought
it was my locker.
Copy !req
46. Yeah, you are
very confused, peewee.
Copy !req
47. Are you sure you're even
in the right school?
Copy !req
48. - How old are you?
- 14.
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49. You can't be 14, midget.
Copy !req
50. You haven't even
hit puberty.
Copy !req
51. - What are you doing?
- I knew it.
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52. You don't even have hair
on your pits.
Copy !req
53. Come on, Karen.
Let's go.
Copy !req
54. You swear you're 14?
Copy !req
55. Then you're a geek.
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56. This is your locker?
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57. There.
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58. Now you'll always know
which one's yours
Copy !req
59. and which one's mine,
okay, geek?
Copy !req
60. You don't have hair
on your pits?
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61. So why did Ricky
break up with Karen?
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62. Is she, like,
a prude?
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63. Did she not,
you know...
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64. go the distance?
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65. "Distance"?
Copy !req
66. No. She's not a prude.
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67. She's a slut, obviously.
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68. Obviously.
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69. She's a friend
of yours.
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70. Last week,
she started getting it on
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71. with Ricky's
older brother.
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72. Oh, cool.
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73. Yesterday,
he walked in on them.
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74. Ew!
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75. Who walked in on who?
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76. "Who walked in on who?"
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77. God, people are so gossipy
at this school.
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78. It's, like, get a life,
you know?
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79. Mm.
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80. Mmm.
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81. Oh.
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82. What's up with her?
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83. Hi.
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84. Uh, that's
Gary Ross' seat.
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85. Oh.
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86. But he's sick.
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87. He has impetigo.
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88. What?
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89. Are you gonna sit
over here now?
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90. I just don't feel like
being abused today.
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91. I mean, I give up,
you know?
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92. I go out of my way
to be nice to her,
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93. and it's like
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94. no matter what I do,
you know?
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95. Oh!
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96. Mmm!
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97. Are you okay?
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98. Mmhmm.
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99. Look, I'm gonna go talk
to Kim right now.
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100. No. No, no, no.
Don't.
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101. No, yeah, I am.
Becau -
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102. Lindsay, it -
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103. Lindsay, it's really cool
when you hang out,
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104. and she shouldn't ruin
everything for everybody
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105. just because she's always
on her period, you know?
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106. No, Nick, it's okay.
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107. No, it's not okay.
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108. It's... you know, it's not okay.
That's the thing.
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109. Just, please don't.
Don't say anything to her.
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110. Promise me you won't.
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111. Yeah.
All right. Okay.
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112. Whatever you want.
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113. Thanks.
Copy !req
114. A defaced locker...
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115. A humiliated freshman...
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116. And a busty succubus
from hell...
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117. perhaps we've left
McKinley High
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118. and entered
the chilling corridors
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119. of the twilight zone.
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120. You're not funny.
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121. I can't believe
she inspected your pits.
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122. Yeah, I thought she was
gonna make sweet love to you.
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123. What am I
supposed to do?
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124. I mean, fight her?
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125. She's a girl.
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126. My dad has a rule:
You don't fight girls.
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127. My dad has a rule:
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128. You don't piss your pants
at school.
Copy !req
129. Hey, I didn't
piss my pants!
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130. Hey! What happened
to my artwork?
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131. I spent a lot
of time on that!
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132. I... I washed it off.
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133. Yeah? Well, how you gonna
remember where your locker is?
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134. I'll remember.
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135. No, you won't.
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136. Listen, I don't wanna
have to fight you.
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137. You wanna fight me, huh?
Is that what you want?
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138. You wanna mix it up
a little bit?
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139. Ooh...
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140. What was that,
Bilbo Baggins?
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141. I... I didn't say anything.
It was him.
Copy !req
142. Are you guys deformed
or something?
Copy !req
143. I mean, what's the deal?
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144. Look, I guess I'm just gonna
have to mark that locker again,
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145. this time...
in geek blood.
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146. Well, I'd better
get to class.
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147. I, uh, I hope she meant
your geek blood.
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148. What are you doing?
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149. Oh, Kim wants me
to wait for her.
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150. She's on the phone
with her mom.
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151. I said, I don't know.
Are you deaf?
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152. No. I'll try,
okay? I'll try.
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153. I'll try!
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154. God, would you quit yelling
at me, you psychopath?
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155. You know, sometimes
relationships can be a drag.
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156. Especially if you're
going out with her.
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157. Sorry.
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158. No, I know.
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159. She can be cool
if you get to know her.
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160. You know, mother, you have
really lost it this time!
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161. No, well, you need help!
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162. God!
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163. Well, as usual, my mother
is being a total shrew.
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164. Oh, biology.
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165. I think I have a test,
so I'll see you guys later.
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166. See ya.
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167. So, how's it goin'?
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168. What?
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169. I said,
how's it goin'?
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170. Fine, I guess.
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171. Well,
what are you doin' later?
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172. I don't know.
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173. Well, meet me
after school, okay?
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174. We can hang.
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175. Okay?
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176. I heard about what she does
in the yearbook darkroom.
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177. "What she does"?
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178. What?
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179. I have no idea
what you're talking about.
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180. She does it.
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181. What do you mean, "it"?
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182. She...
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183. Fornicates it.
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184. Okay?
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185. I doubt it.
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186. And so what if she does?
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187. I just think it's sad.
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188. We can't all
be girl scouts, Millie.
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189. And I expect
legible handwriting!
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190. I can't spend my time trying
to decipher your chicken scrawl.
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191. That's not my job.
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192. You gotta
come see this.
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193. - What is it?
- Hurry, man.
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194. What's a pygmy?
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195. It's a dwarf
from Australia.
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196. It's just a Nickname.
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197. Hey, look, if you
don't get rid of that,
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198. you're gonna
be called "pygmy geek"
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199. for the next 4 years.
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200. Oh, jeez!
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201. Weir!
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202. What the hell
do you think you're doing?
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203. Ooh!
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204. Oh, grow up!
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205. Uh, someone wrote
on my locker.
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206. - So this is your locker?
- Yeah.
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207. No, this is
the school's locker.
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208. That's gonna have
to be repainted, bub.
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209. It wasn't me.
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210. This wasn't you?
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211. Well, yeah, but -
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212. You kids don't respect
school property.
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213. I mean,
you just don't get it.
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214. Okay, I want you
to write an essay
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215. by tomorrow, 500 words
Copy !req
216. "why vandalism,
why the property of school
Copy !req
217. should be respected
and why we should respect it."
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218. And I want that essay on my desk
tomorrow, or you're gonna be
Copy !req
219. on trash detail for a week,
you got me?
Copy !req
220. Laugh it up.
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221. Ow.
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222. Hey, Lindsay,
where you goin'?
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223. I dunno.
Home.
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224. Well, what
are you doing later?
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225. What?
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226. Do you wanna come over
to my house for dinner?
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227. Uh...
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228. Did Nick
say something to you?
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229. What do you mean?
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230. Did Nick tell you
to be nice to me?
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231. Well... yeah.
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232. You know,
I just figure
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233. since we have to see each other
anyways all the time,
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234. we may as well
try to get along.
Copy !req
235. So do you wanna come over
to my house or not?
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236. I don't know.
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237. You know what?
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238. Fine.
Just forget it.
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239. You know, I tried.
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240. Kim!
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241. Yeah.
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242. Yeah, what?
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243. Yeah, I'll have dinner
at your house.
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244. All right.
Copy !req
245. My parents are jerks.
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246. They love
to kill my buzz.
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247. But afterwards we can ditch 'em,
and, I dunno,
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248. go catch a movie
or something?
Copy !req
249. - Okay.
- All right.
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250. I'll pick you up
at your house at 5:30.
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251. Okay.
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252. I'll see you at 5:30!
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253. Yeah. Later.
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254. Hey, honey.
How was school?
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255. I don't wanna talk
about it, okay?
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256. Oh, okay, then.
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257. Samuel, you are going
to ruin your dinner.
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258. I'm loading up
on carbs.
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259. But we're having carbs
for dinner.
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260. You want me to stay a midget?
Is that what you want?
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261. You are not a midget.
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262. Yeah, I am,
and it's because
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263. there's no food
in this house.
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264. I'm malnourished.
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265. No food?
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266. What's all this?
Huh?
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267. Fruit rollups,
beef jerky.
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268. You're just,
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269. you're just finicky.
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270. Mom, is it okay if I
skip out on dinner tonight?
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271. What? Why?
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272. Well, I was invited over
to Kim Kelly's.
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273. - Who's Kim Kelly?
- She's just a friend.
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274. Oh, new friend?
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275. What's she like?
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276. I don't know.
She's just a girl.
Copy !req
277. Kim Kelly's a psycho.
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278. She and Karen Scarfolli...
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279. Well...
Copy !req
280. they're violent.
Copy !req
281. They run around the school
being evil.
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282. That doesn't sound
very nice.
Copy !req
283. Why do you want to be friends
with a girl like that?
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284. She's not evil, Mom.
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285. She's just different.
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286. She doesn't
wear frilly dresses
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287. or prance around
like a cheerleader.
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288. Just 'cause a girl
speaks her mind
Copy !req
289. doesn't mean
she's a psycho.
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290. Well, you should
have told me yesterday.
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291. I'm making veal piccata.
Maybe another night.
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292. Mom, she's coming
to pick me up in 15 minutes.
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293. Fine.
Eat with your friend.
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294. Why are you friends
with Kim Kelly?
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295. Don't talk to me, okay?
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296. Kim Kelly's my enemy.
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297. Look, if you're gonna start
being a tattletale
Copy !req
298. and tryin' to get me
into trouble,
Copy !req
299. then maybe you should go
to a different high school.
Copy !req
300. I don't need some spy
reporting on my every move.
Copy !req
301. I just don't know why
you have to hang out with her.
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302. Why not?
Copy !req
303. Well, because she
and her friends are mean to me.
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304. They wrote "geek"
on my locker.
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305. Well, maybe
you are a geek.
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306. I'm just kidding.
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307. Oh, come on, Sam,
like I meant that.
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308. Hey, move it or lose it.
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309. Oh, man!
Copy !req
310. I got the worst cramps.
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311. I just about died
on the way over here.
Copy !req
312. Hey, Kim.
Copy !req
313. Can you do me a favor?
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314. Can you quit picking on
my little brother?
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315. Oh, yeah.
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316. I keep forgetting
he's your little brother.
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317. He looks just like
all those other geeks.
Copy !req
318. Come on. Let's go.
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319. I hate Lindsay
and her stupid friends.
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320. You don't hate
your sister.
Copy !req
321. Yeah, I do.
She sucks.
Copy !req
322. Samuel, don't ever use
that disgusting word again.
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323. Sorry.
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324. All right,
I'm warning you right now.
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325. My parents
are seriously wacko.
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326. Yeah, mine, too.
Don't worry about it.
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327. No,
mine are mental, okay?
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328. Uh, okay.
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329. They're looking for a reason
to sell my Gremlin.
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330. They are?
Copy !req
331. God, they're such
cheap bastards!
Copy !req
332. But my Aunt Kathy gave me
this car, and it's mine!
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333. Right.
Copy !req
334. My Aunt Kathy
was so rad.
Copy !req
335. She lived in L.A.
She was on "Kojak."
Copy !req
336. She doinked Ryan O'Neal
once at a party.
Copy !req
337. Wow, she sounds awesome.
Copy !req
338. Yeah, well,
she's dead.
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339. She od'd on coke.
Copy !req
340. So, you see...
Copy !req
341. there's a lot riding
on this dinner.
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342. I can't lose my car.
You get it?
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343. I don't know if I do.
Copy !req
344. Roll up my window.
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345. I don't want my car
to get stolen.
Copy !req
346. My parents hate everybody.
Copy !req
347. They hate Daniel.
They can't stand Karen.
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348. The only person
that they like is you.
Copy !req
349. But I've never
even met them.
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350. Yeah, well,
I told them all about you,
Copy !req
351. how you're, like,
this golden girl and everything,
Copy !req
352. how you get good grades.
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353. My mother's going to be
pressing you for information.
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354. Just follow my lead.
Copy !req
355. Oh, and by the way,
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356. I spend the night at your house
every Friday night.
Copy !req
357. And last weekend, we went up
to your vacation house
Copy !req
358. in Benton Harbor
and went waterskiing.
Copy !req
359. Wait, what?
Copy !req
360. Hi there.
You must be Lindsay.
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361. Yeah.
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362. It's really nice
to meet you.
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363. Oh.
Copy !req
364. Kim, did you pick up
any soda?
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365. I forgot.
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366. Yeah?
Copy !req
367. Well, I forgot
to make you dinner.
Copy !req
368. How do you like that?
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369. Come on in.
Copy !req
370. So...
Copy !req
371. Kim says
you're a genius.
Copy !req
372. No, I'm not,
at all.
Copy !req
373. I... I get good grades,
I guess.
Copy !req
374. Well, why don't you
help out Kim?
Copy !req
375. She's hangin' on
for dear life.
Copy !req
376. B.S.
I get good grades.
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377. Oh, I hate
to blow your mind, sister,
Copy !req
378. but "D's are not good.
"D's are bad.
Copy !req
379. I got one "D," okay?
Copy !req
380. I told you, my history teacher
was a pervert.
Copy !req
381. I wasn't about to go
to his house after school
Copy !req
382. to get "tutored."
Copy !req
383. Can it, Kim.
You're gonna wake up Chip.
Copy !req
384. At least
I know how to read.
Copy !req
385. What was that?
Copy !req
386. Nothing.
Copy !req
387. So, I hear you girls
had a fun weekend.
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388. Yeah, it was great.
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389. We went waterskiing.
I love to waterski.
Copy !req
390. And, uh, you got
a vacation house
Copy !req
391. up there in Benton Harbor?
Copy !req
392. - Mm hmm.
- That must be nice, huh?
Copy !req
393. Your family
must be very wealthy.
Copy !req
394. Hardly.
Copy !req
395. Kim says that you
are, uh, affluent.
Copy !req
396. Well, we do all right.
Copy !req
397. You know, I'm really not
supposed to talk about it.
Copy !req
398. My dad always says
a farmer never reveals
Copy !req
399. how many cows he's got.
Copy !req
400. Your old man's a farmer?
Copy !req
401. No. He owns,
um, A1 Sporting Goods.
Copy !req
402. Really?
Can he get us a discount?
Copy !req
403. What?
Copy !req
404. Well, we don't live in
a mansion here, as you can see.
Copy !req
405. We don't have
a swimming pool
Copy !req
406. and tennis court
the way you do.
Copy !req
407. Hey, we may not be rich,
but we get by.
Copy !req
408. We're remodelin'.
Copy !req
409. Oh, and take your time
with that.
Copy !req
410. I love relievin' myself
behind a shower curtain.
Copy !req
411. Eww!
Copy !req
412. Smells like fart.
Copy !req
413. Here.
Hold this test tube.
Copy !req
414. Yeah, right.
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415. I'm not gonna get
my fingers melted off
Copy !req
416. just so you
can get a kick, okay?
Copy !req
417. I need these fingers.
Copy !req
418. Why? So you can
pick your rumpus?
Copy !req
419. Just hold the test tube.
Copy !req
420. No.
I read in this magazine
Copy !req
421. about a chemical
that burns your flesh.
Copy !req
422. Okay? This kid just
got a little bit on him
Copy !req
423. and now he's going to Disneyland
for his last hurrah.
Copy !req
424. You... you guys.
Copy !req
425. I'm writing an essay.
Copy !req
426. Could you just, like,
be quiet, please?
Copy !req
427. Okay?
Copy !req
428. All right.
Copy !req
429. How many words you got?
Copy !req
430. 33.
Copy !req
431. It's so unfair!
Copy !req
432. I mean, if I have
to write an essay,
Copy !req
433. then Karen Scarfolli should have
to write a big, fat book.
Copy !req
434. I think
she's a sex fiend.
Copy !req
435. You should move
your locker.
Copy !req
436. What if she comes to school
really horny one day?
Copy !req
437. Girls don't get horny.
Copy !req
438. They don't?
Copy !req
439. Only guys get horny.
Copy !req
440. Maybe Karen Scarfolli's
a guy.
Copy !req
441. Sam, if it was me,
Copy !req
442. I'd go to Karen Scarfolli's
house and make her write it.
Copy !req
443. - Yeah, I'm sure you would.
- I would.
Copy !req
444. You can't let chicks
humiliate you
Copy !req
445. like that in public.
Copy !req
446. She did not humiliate me.
Copy !req
447. Uh, she kinda did.
Copy !req
448. Okay, all right,
then what about
Copy !req
449. when she started
picking on you?
Copy !req
450. You ran away,
Bilbo Baggins.
Copy !req
451. Yeah? Well at least
I'm not a pygmy.
Copy !req
452. So, how long
you had the house
Copy !req
453. up there
in Benton Harbor, Lindsay?
Copy !req
454. Oh...
Copy !req
455. A few years.
Copy !req
456. Yeah. You know, I did
waitress up there one summer,
Copy !req
457. so I know the area
pretty good.
Copy !req
458. Where's your house at?
Copy !req
459. It's... by the water.
Copy !req
460. Yeah, what neighborhood?
Copy !req
461. Uh, it's, uh...
Copy !req
462. over by the -
Copy !req
463. Uh, mom, Lindsay
invited me up this weekend
Copy !req
464. to go fishing.
Copy !req
465. Can I go?
Copy !req
466. What street is it on?
Copy !req
467. Benton Harbor...
Copy !req
468. Street.
Copy !req
469. You are a lying brat!
Copy !req
470. I knew it!
I told you.
Copy !req
471. I'm not lying.
You guys just can't believe
Copy !req
472. that I could make a friend
who's rich and smart.
Copy !req
473. Well, she's not smart.
Copy !req
474. No, she is!
She's really smart!
Copy !req
475. I swear to God,
she's smart!
Copy !req
476. She's a bum,
like all your other friends!
Copy !req
477. What's happening?
Copy !req
478. It's that car!
Copy !req
479. You're driving around town
Copy !req
480. and you're tramping it up
in that car!
Copy !req
481. I know what you do!
Copy !req
482. Yeah, well,
you should know!
Copy !req
483. I learned it from you!
Copy !req
484. You're grounded for good,
you got me?
Copy !req
485. Newsflash!
You're not my father, fat ass!
Copy !req
486. Damn right, I'm not!
Copy !req
487. Oh, that's it!
We're selling the car!
Copy !req
488. Nuhuh!
That's my car!
Copy !req
489. Aunt Kathy
gave me that car!
Copy !req
490. Oh, yeah?
Well, your Aunt Kathy
Copy !req
491. spent $1,000 of my money
snorting it up her nose,
Copy !req
492. so as far as I'm concerned,
that car is mine!
Copy !req
493. Fine!
I'm outta here.
Copy !req
494. Oh, no.
No, you don't.
Copy !req
495. No! No!
You are not going anywhere.
Copy !req
496. Go to the car, Lindsay!
Copy !req
497. - Give me those keys!
- Go to the car!
Copy !req
498. Hey!
Copy !req
499. Give me the keys!
Give me the keys!
Copy !req
500. - Mom, get off of me!
- Give them to me!
Copy !req
501. Hey, you!
Copy !req
502. - Hey!
- Lindsay, go!
Copy !req
503. - Give me the keys!
- Hey!
Copy !req
504. Ow!
Copy !req
505. Give me the keys.
Give me the keys!
Copy !req
506. Hey!
Copy !req
507. Hey!
Copy !req
508. Open the door!
Copy !req
509. - Kim!
- Aah!
Copy !req
510. - Open that door!
- Lindsay!
Copy !req
511. Get inside!
Copy !req
512. Wait till I get my hands
on you, sister!
Copy !req
513. Get inside!
Copy !req
514. - Get out of that car!
- Get out of there!
Copy !req
515. That's my car!
Now get out!
Copy !req
516. - Get out!
- Kim, hurry!
Copy !req
517. If you leave now,
you are never coming back!
Copy !req
518. Don't you start this car!
Copy !req
519. Go!
Copy !req
520. You are never
coming back here!
Copy !req
521. Damn it!
Copy !req
522. I'm calling
the cops on you!
Copy !req
523. I'm calling the cops
on you!
Copy !req
524. Just look at this!
Copy !req
525. Look at this.
Copy !req
526. - You spoil her!
- Oh, stop it!
Copy !req
527. Ugh!
Copy !req
528. This is my car, my car,
my car, my car!
Copy !req
529. Mine!
My car! My car!
Copy !req
530. God! God!
Copy !req
531. Are you okay?
Copy !req
532. "Benton Harbor Street"?
Copy !req
533. Yeah, well, I've never been
to Benton Harbor, okay?
Copy !req
534. You know, you should've
just told me you were using me.
Copy !req
535. Yeah, well, my parents
are always on my ass
Copy !req
536. about where I'm going.
Copy !req
537. You know,
she thinks I'm a loser.
Copy !req
538. She thinks all my friends
are losers.
Copy !req
539. I just...
Copy !req
540. Wanted to bring home
someone like you.
Copy !req
541. I'm sorry. Okay?
Copy !req
542. Are you happy now?
Copy !req
543. Whatever.
Copy !req
544. I just wish
you would've told me.
Copy !req
545. Ooh! My stepfather
wants to sell my car.
Copy !req
546. I don't think so.
Copy !req
547. With all the dirt
I have on him,
Copy !req
548. he better just watch it,
you know what I mean?
Copy !req
549. So what are you
going to do now?
Copy !req
550. I'm going to find Daniel.
Copy !req
551. When he hears about this,
he's going to flip out.
Copy !req
552. Sorry to break it to you,
but you're the geek.
Copy !req
553. - What?
- You heard me.
Copy !req
554. You're the geek.
Copy !req
555. I may be some things,
but I'm not a geek.
Copy !req
556. "Hey, you guys,
let's go make some acid
Copy !req
557. and pour it
on the sidewalk.
Copy !req
558. Won't that be fun?"
Copy !req
559. Hey, hey, watch it.
That stuff is expensive.
Copy !req
560. You're 14 years old
Copy !req
561. and you still play
with chemistry sets?
Copy !req
562. Uh, hey, nimrod,
Copy !req
563. adults play
with chemistry sets, too.
Copy !req
564. They're called scientists.
Copy !req
565. However, I don't know
too many adults
Copy !req
566. who still play
with their tonka trucks.
Copy !req
567. I don't play
with tonka trucks.
Copy !req
568. You want to go on the record
with that statement?
Copy !req
569. I gave them away,
like, years ago.
Copy !req
570. Uh, ahem.
Copy !req
571. May I direct the jury's
attention to exhibit "A"?
Copy !req
572. "May I direct the jury's
attention to exhibit 'A."'
Copy !req
573. You and your lame
impersonations.
Copy !req
574. Ever thought about teaching
a class in geek?
Copy !req
575. Hey, at least I've got hair
in my pits.
Copy !req
576. Okay. Okay.
Hey, Bill.
Copy !req
577. Bill.
Who's the bigger geek?
Copy !req
578. Me or Neal?
You decide.
Copy !req
579. Well, I don't... neither?
Copy !req
580. Come on.
You gotta choose.
Copy !req
581. I don't know.
Copy !req
582. I mean, what's...
what's "geek" mean anyway?
Copy !req
583. I mean, it's just,
you know, it's just a word.
Copy !req
584. - Come on, Bill.
- Yeah, pick.
Copy !req
585. I guess... Sam.
Copy !req
586. Oh, and the verdict is in.
Copy !req
587. Hey, you shouldn't
feel so ashamed.
Copy !req
588. There are a lot
of famous geeks in history:
Copy !req
589. Einstein, Gilligan,
Gomer Pyle.
Copy !req
590. I mean, you know,
it's all the s -
Copy !req
591. Hey, hey, hey,
come on!
Copy !req
592. Cut it out!
Copy !req
593. Stop it!
Copy !req
594. Hey!
Copy !req
595. - Give it a rest!
- Come on!
Copy !req
596. - Come on.
- Stop it!
Copy !req
597. Stop!
Copy !req
598. You're going
to tear my sweater!
Copy !req
599. You done with
your little hissy fit?
Copy !req
600. Ohh.
Copy !req
601. Stop it! Hey, stop!
Get off me!
Copy !req
602. You guys!
You guys!
Copy !req
603. My chemistry set! Oh!
Copy !req
604. - What is that?
- I don't know!
Copy !req
605. Cover your flesh.
Cover your flesh.
Copy !req
606. All right.
Okay, okay, that's it.
Copy !req
607. Guys, get out! Now!
Copy !req
608. Hey, pass the ball.
Copy !req
609. There's his car.
Copy !req
610. Him and Nick like to come here
and shoot hoops sometimes.
Copy !req
611. Kim.
Copy !req
612. You are dead!
Copy !req
613. You are so dead!
Do you hear me?
Copy !req
614. You are dead!
Both of you are dead!
Copy !req
615. She's pissed.
Copy !req
616. Well, maybe it's
not what you think.
Copy !req
617. I mean, maybe they
were just goofing around.
Copy !req
618. You never know.
Copy !req
619. Oh, god.
Copy !req
620. - God, Kim, I'm so sorry
- Don't touch me!
Copy !req
621. Just don't touch me.
Copy !req
622. I never want
to see him again.
Copy !req
623. It's just, you know,
Copy !req
624. he's the nicest guy
I've ever met, you know?
Copy !req
625. And he's
such a babe, too.
Copy !req
626. I mean, he's sexier
than Rod Stewart.
Copy !req
627. Don't you think?
Copy !req
628. Yeah, he's a really
good looking guy.
Copy !req
629. I mean, Daniel...
Copy !req
630. Daniel is a normal guy,
you know?
Copy !req
631. He'll screw anything
that moves,
Copy !req
632. and that's why
I gotta stay alert.
Copy !req
633. I have to be a bitch,
you know?
Copy !req
634. Oh, my life sucks!
Copy !req
635. No, it doesn't.
Copy !req
636. My parents hate me!
I don't have any friends!
Copy !req
637. You're, like,
my only friend, Lindsay,
Copy !req
638. and you're
you're a total loser.
Copy !req
639. No offense.
Copy !req
640. Sam, slow down.
It's not a race.
Copy !req
641. What's the problem?
Copy !req
642. Well,
he usually never eats,
Copy !req
643. and just look at him.
Copy !req
644. Oh, he's fine.
Copy !req
645. He could use a little meat
on his bones.
Copy !req
646. I... I'm just worried
he might have worms.
Copy !req
647. Sam, do you think
you might have worms?
Copy !req
648. No.
Copy !req
649. - Mom?
- Oh, hey, Lindsay. Oh.
Copy !req
650. - Is this your new friend?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
651. We're going to be
in my room.
Copy !req
652. Are you sure
you don't want any dinner?
Copy !req
653. - No, we're fine.
- What you eatin'?
Copy !req
654. Oh, veal piccata.
Copy !req
655. It looks good.
Copy !req
656. Well, sit down.
I'll get you both a plate.
Copy !req
657. Is everything
all right, Kim?
Copy !req
658. Mom, she's having problems
with her boyfriend.
Copy !req
659. She doesn't want
to talk about it, okay?
Copy !req
660. There, there.
Copy !req
661. I mean, you're a guy,
right?
Copy !req
662. Why are guys
only interested in sex?
Copy !req
663. It's so sick.
Copy !req
664. Damn.
Copy !req
665. What is it, Sam?
Is he going to blow up?
Copy !req
666. That's a perfectly good
piece of veal wasted.
Copy !req
667. I'm telling you,
I think he has a parasite.
Copy !req
668. I'll get it.
Copy !req
669. Hello.
Yes, this is she.
Copy !req
670. Oh, yes. Yeah,
they're both right here.
Copy !req
671. She is?
She did?
Copy !req
672. Really?
Oh, my.
Copy !req
673. No, I had
I had no idea.
Copy !req
674. Oh, no.
Vacation home where?
Copy !req
675. You look familiar.
Copy !req
676. Does any of your family
shop at my store?
Copy !req
677. Yeah, but my mom
hates going there
Copy !req
678. 'cause it's so overpriced.
Copy !req
679. You know, you can get
the same stuff at Sportsmart
Copy !req
680. for a lot less.
Copy !req
681. Thank you
for letting us know.
Copy !req
682. You don't say?
Copy !req
683. Okay, yes. Thank you.
Goodbye.
Copy !req
684. Lindsay, can I see you
in the kitchen for a second?
Copy !req
685. That was Kim's mother
on the phone.
Copy !req
686. What is happening?
Copy !req
687. - What do you mean?
- She was yelling at me.
Copy !req
688. She said
you told them that
Copy !req
689. we have a vacation home
in Benton Harbor,
Copy !req
690. that you and Kim
stay out all night
Copy !req
691. and sleep with boys,
Copy !req
692. and that I shouldn't
believe a word you say.
Copy !req
693. Look, Mom,
none of that is true.
Copy !req
694. I mean, Kim got in a fight
with her parents,
Copy !req
695. and Mrs. Kelly's
just upset.
Copy !req
696. Well, now I'm upset.
Very upset.
Copy !req
697. Mom, come on.
I barely know Kim.
Copy !req
698. Good,
maybe that's for the best.
Copy !req
699. I don't think she's
a very positive influence.
Copy !req
700. Be a little
understanding, Mom.
Copy !req
701. Kim comes from a broken home.
Her parents are deranged.
Copy !req
702. Not everybody's family
is like ours.
Copy !req
703. I know that.
I just don't want to see you -
Copy !req
704. Mrs. Weir,
thank you so much for dinner.
Copy !req
705. It was really great.
Copy !req
706. You guys
have such a nice house.
Copy !req
707. You think it'd be cool if I
hung out here for a little bit?
Copy !req
708. My house is such
a nightmare right now.
Copy !req
709. Oh, of course.
Copy !req
710. Just, please,
make yourself at home.
Copy !req
711. Thanks.
Copy !req
712. You think she might like
some ice cream?
Copy !req
713. I think he's stoned.
Copy !req
714. Stoned? What are you
talking about?
Copy !req
715. Hey, what do you say we guys
go down to the beach
Copy !req
716. and shoot some clams?
Copy !req
717. I hate cop shows.
Cops are such pigs.
Copy !req
718. You know, my brother
got ambushed by cops once.
Copy !req
719. They beat him on the head
with their billy clubs.
Copy !req
720. Oh, my. What was
your brother doing?
Copy !req
721. Nothing. He was just drunk,
minding his own business.
Copy !req
722. The cops
just went nuts on him.
Copy !req
723. Now he sleeps all day
on the couch.
Copy !req
724. He never parties.
Copy !req
725. I think he's got
brain damage.
Copy !req
726. Take these things,
have them analyzed and fast.
Copy !req
727. Nick?
Not that way!
Copy !req
728. I'll get it!
Copy !req
729. Hey. Hey, Lindsay.
Copy !req
730. Hey, Nick.
What's going on?
Copy !req
731. Um, Daniel's
waiting out at the car,
Copy !req
732. and he wants to talk to Kim.
Copy !req
733. I don't think now
is a very good time.
Copy !req
734. - She's really mad.
- Oh, no.
Copy !req
735. Hey, Kim.
Hey, thanks a lot
Copy !req
736. for almost running me over
back there!
Copy !req
737. What do you want?
Copy !req
738. Um, Daniel
is out at the car,
Copy !req
739. and he would like
to talk with you.
Copy !req
740. What are you,
his chore boy?
Copy !req
741. Well, why don't you
go tell your master
Copy !req
742. that I don't ever
want to talk to him again?
Copy !req
743. - He's scum!
- He's waiting outside.
Copy !req
744. Why don't you
go tell him yourself?
Copy !req
745. No way.
I'm not going out there.
Copy !req
746. He can just forget it.
Go tell him to go to hell!
Copy !req
747. Kim, look,
if you don't go out there,
Copy !req
748. then he's just
going to come in here.
Copy !req
749. Maybe you
should talk to the boy...
Copy !req
750. outside.
Copy !req
751. Just tell him
how you feel, honey.
Copy !req
752. I'm not going to
talk to him again, ever!
Copy !req
753. So you can all
just bite me!
Copy !req
754. If she's planning on
sleeping over,
Copy !req
755. she can just
forget about it.
Copy !req
756. You scared me!
Copy !req
757. Crap!
Copy !req
758. - Get outta here!
- What?
Copy !req
759. You heard me.
Get out of my room!
Copy !req
760. After all you did
to me today.
Copy !req
761. What did I do to you?
Copy !req
762. You wrote "geek"
on my locker.
Copy !req
763. Hey, I didn't do that.
Karen did that.
Copy !req
764. Oh, yeah?
Well, she's your friend,
Copy !req
765. and you were laughing.
Copy !req
766. You know
what it feels like
Copy !req
767. to have that
written on your locker?
Copy !req
768. Jeez!
Copy !req
769. Now I have to write
this stupid essay.
Copy !req
770. Okay, listen.
Karen is not my friend, okay?
Copy !req
771. Just wait.
Tomorrow, she's going to learn.
Copy !req
772. What goes around
comes around.
Copy !req
773. What do you mean?
Copy !req
774. Just don't worry about her.
She's dead meat.
Copy !req
775. Really?
Copy !req
776. She messed with
the wrong person this time.
Copy !req
777. I'm just going
to break her arms.
Copy !req
778. Seriously?
Copy !req
779. And after I break her arms,
I'm going to take a wrench
Copy !req
780. and I'm going to pull out
her teeth one by one.
Copy !req
781. And then I'm going
to take a match,
Copy !req
782. and I'm going
to set her hair on fire.
Copy !req
783. Well, don't hurt her
too bad.
Copy !req
784. Just wait.
Copy !req
785. She's going to wish
she was never born.
Copy !req
786. Kim?
Copy !req
787. - Hey.
- Kim?
Copy !req
788. Hey, Lindsay, how's it
how's it going?
Copy !req
789. How's it going?
It's going bad.
Copy !req
790. Hey, those guys are going
to make up, you know?
Copy !req
791. - Don't worry about it.
- She's really pissed.
Copy !req
792. She's always pissed off,
you know?
Copy !req
793. Kim?
Copy !req
794. You just got to try to, like,
calm down a little bit.
Copy !req
795. Yeah, I know.
Copy !req
796. It's just, tonight
has been really intense.
Copy !req
797. Yeah,
you seem really tense.
Copy !req
798. Hey, come here.
Um, here.
Copy !req
799. Aah! Aah!
Harold!
Copy !req
800. Lady,
I'm not going to hurt you.
Copy !req
801. I'm just looking
for my girlfriend.
Copy !req
802. Mom?
Copy !req
803. Hey, Lindsay,
the door was open, so -
Copy !req
804. - Who's this punk?
- Uh, Dad, this is Daniel.
Copy !req
805. He's a friend of mine
from school.
Copy !req
806. Jeez, kid,
you ever hear of a doorbell?
Copy !req
807. People do have
heart attacks, you know.
Copy !req
808. Oh, yeah.
Sorry, pops.
Copy !req
809. - Where's Kim?
- She doesn't want to see you.
Copy !req
810. That's right, so why don't you
get the hell out of here?
Copy !req
811. Hey,
will you let me explain?
Copy !req
812. Explain what,
that I hate you?
Copy !req
813. - Hey, I didn't do nothing.
- Oh, you didn't do anything?
Copy !req
814. I'm sorry, that must've
been somebody else.
Copy !req
815. Will you just calm down
and not be a bitch
Copy !req
816. for one second?
Copy !req
817. What did you call me?
Copy !req
818. What did you call me?
Huh?
Copy !req
819. I said calm down!
Okay?
Copy !req
820. Just go! Ugh!
Copy !req
821. I saw her sucking on
your finger, Daniel!
Copy !req
822. What else
has she sucked on, huh?
Copy !req
823. - Are you high right now?
- No, I am not high!
Copy !req
824. Just don't, you know?
Just don't lie to me!
Copy !req
825. - I'm not lying.
- Don't lie to me!
Copy !req
826. - I'm not lying.
- Just don't, you know?
Copy !req
827. Just stop lying to me!
Copy !req
828. I know that you
slept with her!
Copy !req
829. I'm not lying, okay?
Copy !req
830. I'm not lying.
Copy !req
831. - Oh, just -
- I didn't do nothin'.
Copy !req
832. There's only you.
Copy !req
833. Okay?
Copy !req
834. Okay?
Copy !req
835. God, you suck.
Copy !req
836. There's nobody but you.
Copy !req
837. Mom, Dad.
Copy !req
838. - Okay?
- No. No, it's not okay.
Copy !req
839. I'm still mad at you.
Copy !req
840. It's just no.
Copy !req
841. Lindsay,
who are these people?
Copy !req
842. Mom, Dad,
this is Nick.
Copy !req
843. Uh, oh, hello.
Copy !req
844. Hi. Hey, Mr. Weir.
Hi, Mrs. Weir.
Copy !req
845. I just want you
to know it's, like,
Copy !req
846. such a pleasure
to meet you guys finally.
Copy !req
847. Uh, Lindsay
turned out great!
Copy !req
848. She's... so great.
Copy !req
849. Congratulations.
Copy !req
850. Thanks.
Copy !req
851. Hey, so, um, listen, uh...
Copy !req
852. Do you guys mind
if I have this fruit rollup?
Copy !req
853. Oh, no. No, Please.
Go please, go ahead.
Copy !req
854. Enjoy.
Copy !req
855. - Thank you so much.
- Sure.
Copy !req
856. I think they've made up.
Copy !req
857. Let's go check on them.
Copy !req
858. - Mom, no.
- Oh, Lindsay.
Copy !req
859. I think we deserve
to see a happy ending,
Copy !req
860. don't you, Harold?
Copy !req
861. Are these friends of yours
Copy !req
862. going to be leaving our house
in the near future?
Copy !req
863. Mom, wait.
Copy !req
864. Oh, my.
Copy !req
865. Oh, hey, uh, Mr. Weir.
Copy !req
866. Listen, uh,
I just wanted to tell you
Copy !req
867. I think you got
a great store.
Copy !req
868. There's a lot of great stuff
in there.
Copy !req
869. I bought a basketball in there
a couple of years ago.
Copy !req
870. It still works
and everything.
Copy !req
871. Good.
Copy !req
872. Hey, listen, you guys
mind if I have these or -
Copy !req
873. Oh, please, go ahead.
take them.
Copy !req
874. Thanks so much for dinner
and ice cream and everything.
Copy !req
875. It was really good
to meet you guys.
Copy !req
876. Super nice.
Copy !req
877. Good luck
with your parents.
Copy !req
878. Ugh, don't remind me.
Copy !req
879. Hey, you think it's cool
if I leave my car here tonight?
Copy !req
880. I'll pick it up tomorrow.
We could hang out.
Copy !req
881. Great.
Copy !req
882. So, maybe we can all
have dinner tomorrow night.
Copy !req
883. Well, I got a ton
of homework to do,
Copy !req
884. so I guess I better
go hit the books, huh, Dad?
Copy !req
885. Good night.
Copy !req
886. - This isn't good.
- No.
Copy !req
887. - Hey.
- Hey, Sam.
Copy !req
888. You going to class?
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889. Yeah.
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890. Hey, Sam Weir.
Where's my essay?
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891. Okay, you know
what we're going to do?
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892. We're going to post this
on your locker
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893. so that everyone
in McKinley
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894. can learn from
your little mistake.
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895. All right, I give up.
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896. If you kids
want to live in trash,
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897. that's fine by me.
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898. Did you do this?
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899. I did it.
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900. Because you
are a slut. Slut.
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901. Hey, he hit on me.
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902. Oh, yeah?
Well, after school,
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903. I'm going to hit on you.
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904. See you then.
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905. Bye.
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906. Hey, Kim, thanks.
That was really cool.
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907. No problem, geek.
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