Family Matters 5x15

Directed by Rich Correll

Carl refuses to accept Eddie's story that he got pulled over for speeding ""because he was a black in a white person's neighborhood"" ... until the portly cop finds out the ugly truth. Meanwhile, Urkel tells Richie that he has nothing to fear when going to the dentist, but the nerd soon regrets his move when he has cavities of his own that need filling.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. Move it or lose it.

2. Steve, i've told you before—

3. Don't bother me while i'm watching shai.

4. These guys are drop-dead gorgeous.

5. Well, what about me?

6. You should just drop dead.

7. Aah!

8. What's wrong?

9. Aah!

10. Harbaugh hands off to anderson.

11. He breaks loose!

12. He's at the 50!

13. The 50!

14. The 40!

15. He swivels!

16. He swivels!

17. He fakes! He's up again!

18. He's up again!

19. He tiptoes down the sidelines!

20. He tiptoes down the sidelines!

21. The 20!

22. The 20!

23. The 10! Touchdown!

24. Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

25. Yes!

26. Whoo!

27. What happened? What happened?

28. Touchdown! The bears!

29. Yes!

30. Whoo!

31. Man, it's good to see eddie smiling again.

32. He's been bummed for weeks about his speeding ticket.

33. Speeding ticket?

34. Uh, i don't know what he's talking about, dad.

35. I didn't get a speeding ticket.

36. Yes, you did.

37. You said not to mention it in front of your pappy.

38. Oh, mercy.

39. Boo-boo?

40. Big time.

41. Bye-bye.

42. Edward...

43. This is your second speeding ticket this year,

44. And it's only february.

45. Late february.

46. And i wasn't really speeding, dad.

47. That cop was just trying to fill his quota.

48. I'm a cop, and we don't have quotas.

49. Just how fast were you going?

50. I don't know. I was driving with the flow of traffic.

51. Well, just how fast was the traffic flowing?

52. 86.

53. 86?

54. Edward... Okay, listen up.

55. Now, it's bad enough that you were driving recklessly,

56. But what's even worse is that you tried to hide it from me.

57. But, dad—

58. If you get one more ticket,

59. Your license is suspended for one year.

60. That's not law in this state.

61. But it's the law in this house.

62. 86.

63. Hey, mr. Winslow.

64. What is it, waldo?

65. Tell eddie i'm real sorry about spilling the beans

66. About his speeding ticket.

67. Okay, i will.

68. Tell him don't worry.

69. Mum's the word about him cutting class.

70. Steve.

71. What?

72. Stop staring at me.

73. Oh, i can't help it.

74. It's just that you're so..

75. So..

76. Pretty.

77. Laura.

78. Richie, what are you doing up?

79. I don't feel so good.

80. Oh, come here.

81. What's the matter?

82. My tummy hurts,

83. My head aches, and i think

84. I tore a knee ligament.

85. Well, gee, little buddy, you're falling apart.

86. Yeah, so i better not go to the dentist tomorrow.

87. I see.

88. The dentist is our friend.

89. He examines our teeth

90. To make sure they're strong and clean.

91. If he finds a cavity, he shoves a needle in our gums

92. And then he drills down into our teeth,

93. Occasionally hitting a nerve,

94. Causing excruciating pain.

95. Steve...

96. Then you start convulsing—

97. Steve!

98. Yes?

99. You've helped enough.

100. Oh. Well, i'm here for you, baby.

101. Look, richie...

102. Don't worry. You're just going for a checkup.

103. Want me to go with you?

104. Nope. I'd like you to go for me.

105. Tell you what.

106. I'll take you to the dentist.

107. It's been a while since i've seen old doc smiley.

108. Then i'll treat you to a big bowl of ice cream.

109. Is that a bribe?

110. Yes.

111. I'll take it.

112. Ow!

113. Hey, sweetheart.

114. Huh?

115. How about some pie?

116. Sounds good.

117. Yeah, bring me a slice.

118. You lazy slug, get up and get your own pie.

119. Yes, mother.

120. As long as you're up, bring me a piece.

121. Dad, we got to talk!

122. Edward, what's the matter?

123. I got pulled over by the cops.

124. Did you get a ticket?

125. It wasn't my fault.

126. I warned you. Now hand over your license.

127. You won't even hear me out?

128. What was the ticket for?

129. Failure to signal.

130. I got a ticket once.

131. Did you know the sidewalk isn't a passing lane?

132. Tell us exactly what happened.

133. I was on my way to a party in burlington heights.

134. I was driving along

135. When the cops pulled me over.

136. Did they ask you for your license and registration?

137. Yeah. I asked what was wrong, and one said to shut up.

138. I had to lie facedown. Then he cuffed me.

139. That's unusual procedure...

140. Unless you provoked it.

141. I didn't.

142. People were looking at me like i was a criminal.

143. And i didn't even do anything.

144. Son, are you absolutely sure?

145. The only reason they stopped me

146. Is because i was a black guy in a white neighborhood.

147. Carl, this is frightening.

148. If it happened.

149. Dad!

150. You lied about your last ticket.

151. How do i know you're not lying again?

152. Would i lie about this?

153. I'll check it out.

154. I hope you do.

155. Don't worry. I will.

156. You know what?

157. I thought what i went through was the worst thing

158. I ever experienced. But i was wrong.

159. Not having my own father believe me is even worse.

160. Excuse me.

161. Huh? Oh, okay.

162. Okay, richie, we're all done.

163. Okay, give it to me straight, doc.

164. I can take it.

165. Your teeth are in excellent condition, young man.

166. That's what i kept telling everybody.

167. Do i get a lollipop?

168. Lollipops cause cavities,

169. But you do get...

170. Cinnamon dental floss.

171. Oh, you lucky duck. And it's waxed, too.

172. Can i have some of that?

173. As long as i can examine your teeth.

174. Oh, deal, doc.

175. Richie, wait in the waiting room.

176. I'll be out in a jiffy.

177. Oh, boy!

178. Alright, i feel right at home.

179. Yes, indeed.

180. Did i do that?

181. Fine. You won't find anything wrong

182. With these pearly whites.

183. Every day i brush my teeth, i floss my teeth,

184. And i water pik my teeth.

185. Why? Because i love my teeth.

186. Okay, steve, open wide.

187. Oh, now, how long has it been since your last checkup?

188. Three or four years?

189. Uh-oh...

190. Uh-oh?

191. uh-oh?

192. I think i see a cavity.

193. Cavity? What are you talking about?

194. Tell me, does this hurt?

195. Aah!

196. Whoa! Whoa! I've got to take care of that tooth.

197. Otherwise, it might abscess.

198. Well, doc, i think i should warn you.

199. I have a very low threshold of pain.

200. I'll give you novocain.

201. For some reason, i'm impervious to it.

202. It has no effect on me whatsoever.

203. What about nitrous oxide?

204. Laughing gas?

205. That's right.

206. I've never had it,

207. But i seriously doubt it would affect me.

208. How do you feel?

209. I'm just fine, thank you.

210. Heh heh heh heh heh.

211. Is something funny?

212. Heh heh. Well...

213. Well, i was just thinking—

214. Heh heh heh heh.

215. Your name is doc smiley.

216. Ha ha ha ha ha.

217. But you never smile.

218. Ha ha ha ha ha!

219. Why, getting you to laugh is like pulling teeth.

220. Ha ha ha ha!

221. Please, steve, control yourself.

222. Okay, okay, okay, okay, you're right.

223. What's that?

224. Whoo!

225. Aah!

226. Whoo! Whoo!

227. Aah!

228. Uh, steve, i think it's time to start drilling now.

229. Go ahead. Go ahead.

230. If you strike oil, we'll split the profits 50/50.

231. Ha ha ha ha! Whoo! Whoo!

232. Steve, you really are sensitive to medication

233. 'cause i only gave you a little bit of that laughing gas.

234. Don't worry about me, doc. I'm fine.

235. Hey, steve, give me that.

236. Alright, come on.

237. Steve! Steve! Look, hey! Yo!

238. Steve, stop it! Stop it!

239. Stop it! Steve, stop it!

240. Calm down.

241. Where were you on the night of january 16th?

242. Steve... Steve, calm down, okay?

243. Hey. Hey. Hey, what's this?

244. Put that back. Steve, no.

245. Water fight. Water fight.

246. Aah!

247. Oh! Oh!

248. Steve, give me that.

249. Give me that. Give it to me!

250. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay!

251. I promise i'll be good.

252. Oh, doc!

253. Yes?

254. I lied.

255. Aah! Ha ha ha!

256. Stop it!

257. Evening, guys.

258. Hello.

259. Hey, i'm sergeant carl winslow. And you are?

260. Kenny. Kenny carmichael.

261. Hey, kenny.

262. How you doing?

263. This is my partner jack evans.

264. Jack.

265. Hey, you mind if i join you fellas?

266. I could go for a cruller.

267. Actually, we were just leaving.

268. Oh, come on. What's your hurry? Take a seat.

269. Alright, sergeant.

270. I'll have a cruller, please, and a cup of coffee.

271. Black.

272. So what's this about?

273. Well, uh...

274. You two work the burlington heights district, don't you?

275. Yeah.

276. Did you work the evening shift last night?

277. Yeah, that's right.

278. Say, did you happen to pull over a '77 dodge monaco.

279. The driver was a black teenager.

280. Yeah. Ran a stop sign.

281. It was failure to signal.

282. Whatever. Who are you, the activist on the force?

283. No, i'm a father on the force,

284. And that kid was my son.

285. Look... I can see you being upset and all,

286. But it was your kid that messed up,

287. So don't try and take it out on me, alright?

288. No, it's not alright,

289. And do you know why it's not alright, evans?

290. Because i think that you rousted my son.

291. No way. He fit the description of a carjacker.

292. That won't cut it!

293. Because i am familiar with all the outstanding car jacking bulletins,

294. And not one suspect even remotely resembles my son!

295. Give me a break. It's dark, it's a black guy.

296. Oh, case closed. Lock him up.

297. You know, bottom line...

298. Your kid was in the wrong part of town.

299. The wrong part of town?

300. Yeah.

301. So what are you saying,

302. That black kids aren't allowed in white neighborhoods?

303. They wouldn't be there unless they were looking for trouble.

304. You better talk to your kid. He gave me a lot of lip.

305. Oh?

306. Yeah.

307. Is that why you made him get out of his car?

308. Is that why you forced him to lie down?

309. Is that why you cuffed him?

310. Uh, here you go.

311. Thank you.

312. Look... I've had enough of this.

313. I'm not finished with you yet, evans.

314. Look, sarge, if your son had just told us

315. He was a cop's kid,

316. It would have been no problem.

317. You only harass black kids whose parents aren't cops?

318. I didn't say that.

319. The point is that you two harassed my son

320. Because he's black.

321. You can't prove that.

322. But i can file a complaint,

323. And you can believe

324. That i'm going to be sure

325. That there is an investigation.

326. Well, go ahead.

327. It's our word against your kid's.

328. Bye.

329. Just a second, evans.

330. You know, i really don't know how that badge stays on

331. Because it's pinned to slime.

332. Just a second, son.

333. How long have you been on the force?

334. About a year, almost.

335. Do you like being a cop?

336. Yes, sir.

337. Why? It's a dangerous job.

338. You put your life on the line every day,

339. And you never get credit for it.

340. Yeah, i just thought i might make a difference, you know?

341. Good guys against the bad guys.

342. Well, that's a very good reason.

343. Just one problem, son.

344. Your partner is one of the bad guys.

345. Hello, son.

346. Dad.

347. Edward, you know,

348. I tracked down those cops that pulled you over...

349. And i had a little chat with them.

350. You were right, son. They did harass you.

351. I told you, dad.

352. Son, it's not that i didn't believe you,

353. But i am a cop.

354. I had to check it out for myself.

355. Now, i hope you understand that.

356. Yeah, i guess i do.

357. Good. First thing tomorrow

358. We'll go down, and we'll file a complaint.

359. A complaint? That's it?

360. Those guys should be arrested or worse.

361. Now, edward...

362. I'll never forget what they did.

363. They treated me like an animal.

364. Try to calm down.

365. How do i calm down, dad?

366. How do i do that when i'm so angry inside?

367. This has happened to me. I've been there,

368. But there are two ways to deal with anger.

369. You can let it eat you away inside,

370. Or you can give that anger a voice

371. And try to make a difference.

372. That's why i became a cop.

373. Son.

374. We'll go file that complaint.

375. I'm glad to hear you say that, son.

376. Hey, steve.

377. "dear pud'n pop...

378. "due to extensive dental work, i am in extreme pain

379. And am unable to speak."

380. "this lump in my cheek is not cotton

381. "it's a wedge of cheese i am unable to choose.

382. "ha ha, snort, snort.

383. "anyway,

384. "i need bed rest

385. And will be unable to visit you for several days."

386. Oh, steve, i'm so sorry.

387. You hurry on home and hop into bed

388. While i try to get over the sadness

389. Of not having you around.

390. Okay, alright.

391. Yes!