1. Step right up!
Step right up!Copy !req
2. You won't believe your eyes!Copy !req
3. Step right up and see the
amazing half man, half clam!Copy !req
4. What a rip-off.Copy !req
5. It's just Kim Cattrall
sitting Indian-style.Copy !req
6. Boy, they've got some
very unusual prizesCopy !req
7. at the carnival this year.Copy !req
8. A winner!Copy !req
9. Congratulations, son.Copy !req
10. You've won a genuine
live homosexual!Copy !req
11. Ooh, where are we going?Copy !req
12. Wait, don't tell me.Copy !req
13. Oh, boy!
Mom, can I keep him?Copy !req
14. Well, it's a big
responsibility, Chris.Copy !req
15. That means you'll have
to clean up after
him and feed him.Copy !req
16. What do you eat?Copy !req
17. Attention.Copy !req
18. I like your hair.
Still hungry.Copy !req
19. You have a beautiful
speaking voice.Copy !req
20. I'm full.Copy !req
21. Let's see.Copy !req
22. I guess 185 pounds.Copy !req
23. Wrong.
I'm 95% helium.Copy !req
24. Brian, look what I won!Copy !req
25. Wow, what'd
you win that for?Copy !req
26. For having the best pig
in the competition.Copy !req
27. Wait, you bred a pig?
Sure did.Copy !req
28. Most genetically-perfect
one in the contest.Copy !req
29. Oink.Copy !req
30. Oh, my God!Copy !req
31. Yes, he's something,
isn't he?Copy !req
32. Are those fists?Copy !req
33. Damn right.
Show him, pig.Copy !req
34. How the hell did you do this?Copy !req
35. I'll let you in on
a little secret, Brian.Copy !req
36. I didn't do it.
I got it from a farm.Copy !req
37. What the hell kind of farm
breeds pigs like this?Copy !req
38. Would you like to see it
for yourself, Brian?Copy !req
39. Yeah, I would.Copy !req
40. Good, 'cause it's gonna
blow your mindCopy !req
41. like the stereopticon did
to Americans in 1910.Copy !req
42. Hey, I'm in New York City!Copy !req
43. No, I'm not!
Yes, I am!Copy !req
44. No, I'm not! Yes, I am!Copy !req
45. What's going on here?Copy !req
46. This is it, Brian.Copy !req
47. What's that?Copy !req
48. It's how I got the pig.Copy !req
49. You ever heard
of the multiverse
theory, Brian?Copy !req
50. Well, of course I have,Copy !req
51. but I'm wondering
if you have.Copy !req
52. Oh, my God.
So transparent.Copy !req
53. Well, the theory statesCopy !req
54. that there are
an infinite number of universesCopy !req
55. coexisting with ours
on parallel dimensional planes.Copy !req
56. Dimensional
planes, right.Copy !req
57. Don't, don't do that.Copy !req
58. Don't, don't repeat
the last two wordsCopy !req
59. like you already kinda knew
what I was talkin' about.Copy !req
60. You have no idea
what I'm talkin' about.Copy !req
61. Now in each of these
alternate universes,Copy !req
62. the reality is different
than our own.Copy !req
63. Sometimes only slightly,
sometimes quite radically.Copy !req
64. The point is, every possible
eventuality exists.Copy !req
65. And that's where
you got the pig,Copy !req
66. in a parallel universe.Copy !req
67. Prepare yourself, Brian,
and I'll show you.Copy !req
68. Where are we?Copy !req
69. This is Quahog, Brian.
Same year, same time.Copy !req
70. But in this universe,Copy !req
71. Christianity never existed,
which means the Dark AgesCopy !req
72. of scientific repression
never occurred, and thus,Copy !req
73. humanity is a thousand years
more advanced.Copy !req
74. Ergo, muscular,
genetically perfect pigs.Copy !req
75. Hey, look,
there's Quagmire.Copy !req
76. Thanks, honey.
Say hi to your husband.Copy !req
77. Oh, I got AIDS again.Copy !req
78. Better take my
"NyQuil Cold, Flu, and AIDS."Copy !req
79. All gone.Copy !req
80. What time do you
suppose it is, Brian?Copy !req
81. I don't know,
about 3:30.Copy !req
82. Watch the sidewalk.Copy !req
83. My God,
is that... Meg?Copy !req
84. 36D, Brian.Copy !req
85. And you know
what's amazing?Copy !req
86. In this universe,Copy !req
87. she's still one
of the ugly ones.Copy !req
88. If you saw Lois,Copy !req
89. you'd have to put your penis
in a wheelchair.Copy !req
90. Come on.
I'll show you around.Copy !req
91. Hey, is there a
bathroom around here?Copy !req
92. Oh, you need
to go pee or poop?Copy !req
93. Poop.
One poop removal.Copy !req
94. Wow, did I just go poop?Copy !req
95. You sure did.
All digital.Copy !req
96. Where does it go?Copy !req
97. It gets beamed
to another dimension.Copy !req
98. Let me ask you this:Copy !req
99. what about all the
Renaissance art that
Christianity inspired?Copy !req
100. That was
my first question, too.Copy !req
101. Come on, have a look
at the Sistine Chapel.Copy !req
102. Wow.Copy !req
103. Yeah, with no Christianity
to inspire Michelangelo,Copy !req
104. they gave the job
to John Hinckley.Copy !req
105. All right, you ready
to go home now?Copy !req
106. Are you kidding?
This is amazing.Copy !req
107. Can we see
more universes?Copy !req
108. Hmm, well, I haven't
tried yet,Copy !req
109. but I don't see why not.Copy !req
110. Whoa, what's this place?Copy !req
111. Yeah, this universe
looks weird.Copy !req
112. Yeah, it's cheap
and somehow lazy.Copy !req
113. Yabba-dabba... (giggles)Copy !req
114. RockPeter?Copy !req
115. Yes, RockLois?Copy !req
116. That was wonderful rock sex
we had last rock night.Copy !req
117. Yes, I enjoyed rocking you up
the rock last night.Copy !req
118. I know. I'm glad you wore
that rock ring.Copy !req
119. But we still always use
a rockphylactic.Copy !req
120. I'm ribbited for your pleasure.Copy !req
121. Hey, Brian, want to get
the rock out of here?Copy !req
122. Rock yeah.Copy !req
123. Huh, this looks like
Spooner Street,Copy !req
124. only something's
not quite right.Copy !req
125. According
to the multiverse guide,Copy !req
126. this is a universe
where the United StatesCopy !req
127. never dropped
the atomic bomb on Hiroshima,Copy !req
128. so the Japanese
just never quit.Copy !req
129. Well, I think
I've seen enough.Copy !req
130. Let's get back
to our universe.Copy !req
131. All right, off we go.Copy !req
132. Ah, home, sweet home.Copy !req
133. Peter?Copy !req
134. (sad):
Peter?Copy !req
135. (happy):
What?Copy !req
136. (sad):
What?Copy !req
137. (happy):
Can you take out
the trash?Copy !req
138. (sad):
'Cause it stinks
in the kitchen.Copy !req
139. (happy):
Sure thing, Lois, delighted to.Copy !req
140. (sad): I get tired
when I stand.Copy !req
141. What the hell is this?Copy !req
142. This isn't our universe.Copy !req
143. Apparently, this is
a universeCopy !req
144. where everyone has two heads:
one happy, one sad.Copy !req
145. Honey, have you
seen Stewie?Copy !req
146. I can't find
him anywhere.Copy !req
147. I sure have!Copy !req
148. He's over there,
playing in the corner.Copy !req
149. (happy): I want you
to know I love you.Copy !req
150. (sad): I'm trying to get
excited about it.Copy !req
151. Oh, this is too freaky.Copy !req
152. Why didn't that
thing take us home?Copy !req
153. I don't know.
I told you,Copy !req
154. it hasn't been
fully tested yet.Copy !req
155. Well, we can't stay here.
That's for sure.Copy !req
156. (happy):
And now back to Channel 5 News
at 6:00.Copy !req
157. (sad):
Quahog's lowest-rated newscast.Copy !req
158. The president's dog
just had puppies!Copy !req
159. There was a plane crash.Copy !req
160. Stewie, please tell me
you know how to get us home.Copy !req
161. Of course I know
how to get us home.Copy !req
162. What the hell?
Stewie, what's going on?Copy !req
163. Well, from the look of it,Copy !req
164. I'm guessing this is Quahog,
but during some sort of ice age.Copy !req
165. Well, press the button.
Get us outta here.Copy !req
166. Uh-oh, I can't reach
the device.Copy !req
167. What?
You're kidding.Copy !req
168. Yeah, get comfortable.Copy !req
169. I think we're gonna be here
for a while.Copy !req
170. Oh, look, there's your poop
from the other universe.Copy !req
171. Stewie, you gotta
get us out of here!Copy !req
172. If we stay in here
much longer,Copy !req
173. we're either gonna
freeze or starve!Copy !req
174. I know, but I can't reach
the device.Copy !req
175. You try.
You're closer to it,Copy !req
176. and besides,
you're stronger than I am.Copy !req
177. Hey, what was that?Copy !req
178. Oh, well, you said
I was stronger than you,Copy !req
179. and that must have
made me happy.Copy !req
180. So my tail
started wagging.Copy !req
181. Looks like it carved
through the ice a bit.Copy !req
182. Yeah, it did.
Keep going.Copy !req
183. Okay, uh, let's see, um...Copy !req
184. you want to go
for a walk?Copy !req
185. It's working!
Do more!Copy !req
186. Uh, you want a treat?
You want a treat, boy?Copy !req
187. That's good,
that's good, but you...Copy !req
188. you really have
one, right?
Oh, yeah, yeah.Copy !req
189. And we're going
for that walk?Copy !req
190. Oh, yeah, definitely.
And, um, I'll, I'll
give you a bath!Copy !req
191. No, no, no!
Oh, sorry, sorry.Copy !req
192. And, and I'll,
I'll let you go
for a ride in the car!Copy !req
193. Oh, you better
not be lying!Copy !req
194. You want to sleep
in the bed with us?Copy !req
195. Yes! Oh, I never get to!Copy !req
196. It must be a
special occasion!Copy !req
197. You got it!
You're through!Copy !req
198. Yes! All right,
what do I do?Copy !req
199. Just press
the red button!Copy !req
200. Okay.
Uh, which one's red?Copy !req
201. Press the big button!Copy !req
202. This can't be it.
This doesn't
look familiar.Copy !req
203. You're right, Brian.Copy !req
204. Apparently, this is
a universeCopy !req
205. where everyone has
to take a poop
right just now.Copy !req
206. Okay, uh, Bill, you got
those numbers?
Yeah, yeah.Copy !req
207. Okay, just leave
them on my desk.Copy !req
208. Okay, that works out
fine for me.Copy !req
209. Where's your desk?
Doug knows
where my desk is.Copy !req
210. Craig, are you
good with this?Copy !req
211. Yeah, that should work out
pretty good for me, too.Copy !req
212. What the hell?
What's happened to us?Copy !req
213. I don't know,
but suddenly I feelCopy !req
214. all sweet and warm
and fuzzy.Copy !req
215. It seems we're in a universeCopy !req
216. where everything is drawn
by Disney.Copy !req
217. Look, there's
our house.Copy !req
218. Look how
gaily we run!Copy !req
219. Oh, Stewie and Brian,
you're just in time for pie.Copy !req
220. Did somebody say "pie"?Copy !req
221. This is wonderful, Brian.Copy !req
222. Oh, let's live in this universe.Copy !req
223. Gosh, it's pretty
intoxicating, isn't it?Copy !req
224. I want to hear
more music about pie.Copy !req
225. (Herbert's voice):
You want a nice, shiny red apple
to put in that pie?Copy !req
226. No!Copy !req
227. Brian, we could spend
the rest of our lives here.Copy !req
228. It's perfect.
Sounds good to me.Copy !req
229. Doesn't seem to be a thing
wrong with this place.Copy !req
230. Hello, everybody.Copy !req
231. Jew!Copy !req
232. Oh, yeah, I forgot.
This is a Disney universe.Copy !req
233. Oh, but look at how shiny
my buttons are here.Copy !req
234. Just push the...
Yeah, yeah,
okay, okay.Copy !req
235. I'll push the thing.Copy !req
236. Whoa, this is trippy.Copy !req
237. I should say so. We're in
the Robot Chicken universe.Copy !req
238. Will you guys move?
You're blocking the TV.Copy !req
239. Look! GI Joe, Transformers,
Thundercats, He-Man!Copy !req
240. Yay! Those shows existed!Copy !req
241. How's it feel to be on a major
network for 30 seconds?Copy !req
242. (bleep) you!Copy !req
243. Bye.Copy !req
244. My God. This place
looks terrible.Copy !req
245. Looks like Quahog
was vaporized or something.Copy !req
246. It says that in this universe,
Frank Sinatra was never born,Copy !req
247. and therefore, he was unable
to use his influenceCopy !req
248. to get Kennedy elected.Copy !req
249. So, Nixon won
the 1960 electionCopy !req
250. and totally botched the
Cuban Missile Crisis,Copy !req
251. causing World War III.Copy !req
252. Wow, so I guess Lee Harvey
Oswald never shot Kennedy?Copy !req
253. No, He shot Mayor McCheese.Copy !req
254. That joke's
not in bad taste, right?Copy !req
255. Oh, who cares?
He's a cheeseburger.Copy !req
256. Ew. Where are we?Copy !req
257. I don't know. The device can't
make heads or tails of it.Copy !req
258. It's just some sort of weird,
low-resolution blocky universe.Copy !req
259. Lois, where is my supper?Copy !req
260. Still in the oven.Copy !req
261. Will I have it soon?
Quite soon.Copy !req
262. Thank you!
You're welcome!Copy !req
263. Nyah!
Nyah!Copy !req
264. Nyah!
Nyah!Copy !req
265. Nyah!
Nyah!Copy !req
266. Nyah!
Nyah!Copy !req
267. I'm frightened.
Let's go.Copy !req
268. Love it.
Hate it.Copy !req
269. Love it.
Hate it.Copy !req
270. Uh, Brian?
Yeah?Copy !req
271. This feels weird.Copy !req
272. Hit the button.Copy !req
273. Oh, God, what is this?Copy !req
274. I feel like I'm on acid
or something.Copy !req
275. According to the Multiverse
Guide, this is a universeCopy !req
276. where everything is depictedCopy !req
277. as a Washington Post
political cartoon.Copy !req
278. Good Lord, I'm naked.Copy !req
279. And why am I holding
a dinner platterCopy !req
280. that says McCain/Feingold?Copy !req
281. That's-That's pretty good.Copy !req
282. That's-That's funny.Copy !req
283. You don't get it.Copy !req
284. No, no, I totally get it.Copy !req
285. Oh, God.
Let's go, quick.Copy !req
286. Here comes an overweight cat
with dollar signs for eyesCopy !req
287. and a hat that says
"Social Security,"Copy !req
288. pouring a bucket that says
"Alternative minimum tax"Copy !req
289. over a sad Statue of Liberty
holding a democracy umbrella.Copy !req
290. (laughing):
Yes!Copy !req
291. Oh, that ought
to wake people up.Copy !req
292. Shut the (bleep) up.Copy !req
293. Oh, my God.
Now we're nowhere.Copy !req
294. Not quite, Brian.Copy !req
295. This is a universe,
but its only inhabitantCopy !req
296. is one really faraway guy
who yells compliments.Copy !req
297. I like your shirt!Copy !req
298. Thank you!Copy !req
299. This was nice.Copy !req
300. We did it. We're back.Copy !req
301. No. This is the universe
of misleading portraiture.Copy !req
302. Aw.Copy !req
303. Oh, wait. It's not so bad.
There's the compliment guy.Copy !req
304. Hello!Copy !req
305. (groans)
They got both of us!Copy !req
306. We're finished. We're
never going to get home.Copy !req
307. We're never going to
see our Peter and LoisCopy !req
308. or anyone else
we know ever again.Copy !req
309. You got your pal Stewie.Copy !req
310. Great.
Aw, you could learn
something from Compliment Guy.Copy !req
311. And you know,
it's not as bad as you think.Copy !req
312. I may have
finally figured this out.Copy !req
313. I just need to make
a few more calculations...Copy !req
314. Whoa.Copy !req
315. Sorry about that.
Bad girl, Holly.Copy !req
316. No jumpies.Copy !req
317. Oh, it's quite all right.Copy !req
318. Um, wow.
Okay, this is ridiculous.Copy !req
319. You go here.
You, you naughty little wire,Copy !req
320. you're supposed to be over here.Copy !req
321. How did you get over there?Copy !req
322. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
323. Come on, Holly.
Let's go.Copy !req
324. This guy's a freak.Copy !req
325. And that should do it.Copy !req
326. Now, let's go home.Copy !req
327. Hey! What the hell
are you doing?Copy !req
328. I just don't think we
should be too hasty.Copy !req
329. I mean, we have a
unique opportunityCopy !req
330. to study alternate
universes in depth.Copy !req
331. Brian,
give me the damn device.Copy !req
332. Give it.
(groaning)Copy !req
333. No, knock it off.
Give it.Copy !req
334. No, stop it. Stop it.
Come on, give it.Copy !req
335. No. Come on.
Come on.Copy !req
336. What the hell, man?Copy !req
337. What the hell?
Look what you did!Copy !req
338. You better put that
thing on a leash, sir,Copy !req
339. or I'm going to
have to fine you.Copy !req
340. Take your stinkin' paws off me,
you damn dirty dog.Copy !req
341. What the hell
were you thinking, Brian?Copy !req
342. We're never going
to get home now.Copy !req
343. Why the hell would you
break the damn device?Copy !req
344. Look, it was an
accident, all right?Copy !req
345. And besides,
look at this place.Copy !req
346. It's a world run by dogs.Copy !req
347. I mean, I kind of want
to explore this universe.Copy !req
348. Oh, you like role reversal?Copy !req
349. Huh? Okay.Copy !req
350. Wait, what are you doing?
Oh! Oh! Come on!Copy !req
351. Pick up my poop!
Pick up my poop!Copy !req
352. I'm not picking
up your poop!Copy !req
353. Hey, you.
Pick up that poop.Copy !req
354. You heard him, Brian.
Pick up my poop.Copy !req
355. Go on. Pick it up.
Do it. Pick up my poop!Copy !req
356. I need a plastic bag.Copy !req
357. Here's a thin napkin.Copy !req
358. Okay, I'm a new neighbor and
you're my pet human Hotchkiss.Copy !req
359. Got it?
I-I-I don't...Copy !req
360. I'm not so crazy
about "Hotchkiss" anymore.Copy !req
361. What do you mean? You
came up with Hotchkiss.Copy !req
362. I know, but...Copy !req
363. How about Axel or-or-or
Maximilian or Dex, you know?Copy !req
364. It's-It's got to have
an "X" in it because...Copy !req
365. 'cause that means
I have cool parentsCopy !req
366. who take me on expensive
ski trips on spring breakCopy !req
367. and I get
to drink wine with dinner,Copy !req
368. even though
I'm only 14, and...Copy !req
369. Oh, my God! I know that sound!Copy !req
370. That means there's a potential
intruder at the front doorCopy !req
371. or one of my pals.
Either way, I'm really excitedCopy !req
372. and ready for
anything! Hello?Copy !req
373. Hello, my name
is Blake Carrington.Copy !req
374. Aw.
And this is
my human, Gabe.Copy !req
375. Oh, no. What?Copy !req
376. We just moved in
down the streetCopy !req
377. and thought we'd stop in
and say hi to our new neighbors.Copy !req
378. Well, great to meet you.
Come on in. I'm Peter.Copy !req
379. This is my family.
My wife Lois.Copy !req
380. My son, Chris— Chris,
stop licking yourselfCopy !req
381. and come up and say hi!Copy !req
382. My daughter Meg.Copy !req
383. Our puppy Stewie.Copy !req
384. And this is
our human Brian.Copy !req
385. Nice to meet you.Copy !req
386. "Say hi
to human Brian, Blake,"Copy !req
387. says Gabe.
Hi.Copy !req
388. Mommy, I want to play
with the new human.Copy !req
389. Only if it's okay
with Blake.Copy !req
390. Uh, yeah, sure,
it's fine.Copy !req
391. Gabe is great with puppies.Copy !req
392. I swear to God, I hope
the next universe we go toCopy !req
393. is all Koreans.Copy !req
394. I know who you are, Stewie.Copy !req
395. I beg your pardon?Copy !req
396. I've perfected
multiverse travel, as well.Copy !req
397. In fact, I've figured outCopy !req
398. how to navigate
with absolute precision.Copy !req
399. Really?
I haven't.Copy !req
400. We've been jumping randomly
from one universe to the next.Copy !req
401. Did you have
the "shuffle" button on?Copy !req
402. Oh, my God.
There you go.Copy !req
403. That's why that
little symbol...Copy !req
404. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
The two
crossed arrows...Copy !req
405. There it is.
is up there
in the corner.Copy !req
406. There's your problem.
Oh, my God. I feel silly.Copy !req
407. But I can't do
anything about it.Copy !req
408. My device has
been destroyed.Copy !req
409. Well, I've got one of my own.
I can use it to send you back.Copy !req
410. Hold on, I'll get it.Copy !req
411. Oh, my God! Who is it? I got it!Copy !req
412. Morning, Peter.
Hey, Joe.Copy !req
413. Bonnie and I
are having company tonight,Copy !req
414. wondering if I could
borrow some wet food.Copy !req
415. Yeah, sure thing.Copy !req
416. That's Joe.
He's our local human catcher.Copy !req
417. So don't misbehave or the human
catcher'll come after you...Copy !req
418. Gabe.Copy !req
419. My name's not Gabe!
(growls)Copy !req
420. Ow!
(screams)Copy !req
421. Oh, you're in big trouble,
you little crap!Copy !req
422. Boy, you shouldn't have
done that, little fella.Copy !req
423. You just earned yourself
a trip to the pound!Copy !req
424. Who the hell
do you think you are?Copy !req
425. Brian! Brian!Copy !req
426. Do something!Copy !req
427. Look, I'm sorry about this.Copy !req
428. Let me just pay the fine
or whateverCopy !req
429. and I'll make sure
this doesn't happen again.Copy !req
430. You can pick
him up tomorrow.Copy !req
431. Oh. Okay.Copy !req
432. Just bring a trash bag.Copy !req
433. What did he mean by that?Copy !req
434. Any human that bites
a dog gets euthanized.Copy !req
435. You know that.
No, he doesn't!Copy !req
436. He's from another universe where
dogs are subservient to humans.Copy !req
437. Oh, you mean like
that time we...
Yeah.Copy !req
438. When we bounced around
between univ...
Yeah.Copy !req
439. And you couldn't figure out
how to...
Yes!Copy !req
440. Oh, they're going
to kill him!Copy !req
441. We got to get him
out of there!Copy !req
442. It's a tough world here.Copy !req
443. You hear about it every night
on the dog news.Copy !req
444. Coming up, that bush in the park
is my bush!Copy !req
445. My bush!Copy !req
446. Look, there he is!Copy !req
447. Oh, thank God. I'm saved.Copy !req
448. Come on,
let's get out of here.Copy !req
449. All right, the two of you,
stand over thereCopy !req
450. and I'll send you back
where you belong.Copy !req
451. Gosh, Brian,
I sure hope this next leap...Copy !req
452. will be the leap home.Copy !req
453. Wait!Copy !req
454. Take me with you.Copy !req
455. What do you mean? You can't
come back to our universe.Copy !req
456. Come on, a place
where humans are in charge?Copy !req
457. I can't pass that up.Copy !req
458. Hey!Copy !req
459. Get away from there!Copy !req
460. Well, this looks like home.Copy !req
461. Is there any way
we can be sure?Copy !req
462. Hmm.Copy !req
463. Mom, have you seen
my Trapper Keeper?Copy !req
464. Yeah, we're home!Copy !req
465. Well, now, what do we do
about this guy?Copy !req
466. We got two Brians
in our universe now.Copy !req
467. Don't worry, I don't
plan to stay in Quahog.Copy !req
468. I'm gonna go out into the worldCopy !req
469. and see
what I can make of myself.Copy !req
470. I can be somebody here.Copy !req
471. And it should be easy
for you, because...Copy !req
472. I mean— what luck—
you're white.Copy !req
473. You have no idea
how big that is here.Copy !req
474. Good-bye, Stewie.
Good-bye, Brian.Copy !req
475. Maybe our paths
will cross again someday.Copy !req
476. Ah, look at him go.Copy !req
477. Free in a world
of his own kind,Copy !req
478. where he can finally reach
the full potential...Copy !req
479. Oh, my God!
He got hit by a car!Copy !req