1. Chris,
look at your sister.
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2. What happened to her?
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3. You weren't watching her,
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4. that's what happened to her.
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5. I told you I wanted a cookie.
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6. Mom, I just sat down
for a minute.
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7. Do you know
what can happen in a minute?
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8. Now, go get your sister
washed up now.
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9. Come on, Tonya.
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10. Thanks to Drew and Tonya,
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11. I was taking care of kids
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12. until I was taking care
of my own kids.
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13. Chris, get me
some potato chips.
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14. Chris, help me
with my homework.
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15. Chris, find
my doll.
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16. Make me a peanut butter
and jelly sandwich.
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17. Make me Kool-Aid.
Strap up my shoe.
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18. Chris, I'm going
to take a shower.
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19. Watch the kids.
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20. Chris, tie my shoe!
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21. Chris, I'm going
to pick up my Porgy's.
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22. Watch the kids!
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23. Chris, help!
My head is stuck!
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24. Chris, I'm going to eat
some peanuts.
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25. Watch the kids.
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26. I'm going to get
my mustache waxed.
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27. Watch the kids.
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28. Chris!
Chris!
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29. Chris!
Chris!
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30. Chris!
Chris!
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31. Whoa!
Whoa!
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32. The one thing that
Drew and I did together
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33. was watch basketball games
andRockymovies.
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34. Tonight was basketball.
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35. Whoa! See that shot?
Whoa!
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36. But since we only had one TV,
we had to share with Tonya,
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37. and Tonya always got her way.
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38. Mama said I can watch
Three's Company.
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39. We're watching the game.
I don't care.
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40. Move.
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41. Mm.
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42. Oh, hey, baby.
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43. How was work?
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44. Hard.
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45. You know,
I was thinking
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46. that maybe we should go out,
you know?
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47. Have dinner...
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48. relax a little.
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49. Why would I go out to relax,
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50. when I can relax at home
for free?
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51. That was my father's
rationale for everything.
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52. Twenty dollars
to get in the club?
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53. We can dance at home
for free.
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54. I just wanted to
do something nice.
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55. That's all.
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56. I think staying home
is nice.
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57. Well, you're not here
all day.
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58. Well, why don't I
stay home,
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59. and you can go out
and work two jobs?
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60. [SPEAKING IN MUFFLED
SLOW-MOTION]
I'm sorry.
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61. Where's a time machine
where you could just go back
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62. and shut up?
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63. I did not mean— I'm not
trying to take anything away
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64. from what you do here.
That's okay.
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65. If you don't want to go out,
you don't have to.
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66. No, look—
It's okay, no.
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67. Enough said.
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68. It's over. Over.
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69. There are two things
my father knew for sure:
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70. He knew he knew nothing
for sure,
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71. and he knew
this wasn't over.
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72. Hey, Dad.
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73. Hey, guys.
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74. Y'all eating already?
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75. Mm-hmm.
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76. Where's your mother?
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77. In the kitchen.
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78. Hey, babe.
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79. What's for dinner?
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80. Well, the kids
are having chicken.
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81. What about me?
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82. Well, you got two jobs.
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83. You could take
your two-job money
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84. and go buy you
a two-job meal.
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85. I'm sorry, baby.
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86. If you want to go out,
we can go out.
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87. Thank you, baby, oh!
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88. I'll call
Sheila's babysitter
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89. and tell her
she can come tomorrow.
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90. Why do we got to
pay a babysitter
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91. when Chris'll do it for free?
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92. No, he does it during
the day, not at night.
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93. Rochelle, we don't
really need...
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94. Do you want me
to make you some chicken?
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95. Okay, well, I'm gonna
call Sheila's babysitter.
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96. Hi, I'm Yvette.
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97. Oh, okay,
come on in.
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98. Okay, so I have
some chicken
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99. baking in the oven.
Just take it out
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100. in about
20 minutes.
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101. Chris and Drew
are gonna watch the game.
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102. What am I gonna do
while Chris and Drew
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103. are watching the game?
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104. Well,
you can hang with me.
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105. I'll show you
how to do French braids.
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106. Okay.
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107. Yvette, I left the number
to the restaurant
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108. by the phone.
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109. Now, call me if anything
goes wrong, okay?
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110. Everything's
gonna be fine.
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111. Chris, I don't want
that girl calling us.
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112. So if there's
a problem...
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113. handle it.
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114. Me and your mother
don't go out often,
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115. so I don't want
nothing to spoil it.
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116. Here.
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117. Whoa, what's this?
That's emergency money.
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118. My father believed there's
nothing $10 couldn't fix.
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119. What if something
costs $11?
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120. Talk them down to 10.
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121. Got it.
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122. Okay, you guys be good.
All right, Chris.
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123. Call me if you need
anything, okay?
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124. Okay.
Okay, bye, y'all.
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125. Bye.
Bye-bye.
Bye, Dad.
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126. Bye, sweetie.
Take your time and have fun.
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127. Welcome to Pastures
and Shores.
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128. May I take your order?
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129. Okay, I'll have
the all-you-can-eat
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130. shrimp and sirloin combo,
well done,
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131. order of coleslaw
and a Coke.
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132. And you, sir?
I'll have
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133. the ultimate surf and turf
and a large Coke.
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134. That'll be 17.99.
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135. Ooh. Wait, baby.
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136. Are you sure
we can afford this?
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137. It's okay.
I have coupons.
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138. If there was a coupon for
something, my father had it.
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139. Whoa, whoa,
whoa!
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140. What's this?
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141. A coupon—
No tickets on Tuesday.
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142. This doesn't include
the all-you-can-eat
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143. shrimp and sirloin combo.
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144. Oh, you know what?
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145. I'll just order
something else.
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146. I'll take the—
No, it's okay.
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147. I want everything
to be perfect.
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148. Get what you want.
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149. I'll pay for it.
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150. Is there a problem?
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151. Can I have my coupon?
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152. to Irving inside,
and Irving gets the basket.
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153. Having a babysitter
in the house was great,
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154. because the only kid
I had to worry about was me.
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155. I'll be right back.
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156. Sixers beat the Knicks
five out of six.
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157. No, I can't talk right now.
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158. My mother would never hire
someone
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159. she thought was irresponsible.
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160. But irresponsible people
never tell you
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161. that they're irresponsible—
because they're irresponsible!
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162. Chris, I gotta go.
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163. What do you mean, you gotta go?
I got something
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164. I gotta do.
You are doing something!
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165. You stayed with your brother
and sister before, right?
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166. Yeah, but that's only
during the day.
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167. You'll be fine.
I'll be right back.
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168. At that moment, I wanted to
bust her right upside the head.
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169. I'm hungry.
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170. Oh, our food, yeah.
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171. Oh.
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172. Thank you.
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173. I am hungry.
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174. Thank you.
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175. Oh, wait, wait.
Uh, excuse me.
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176. I ordered coleslaw,
but this is potato salad.
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177. I'll get the manager.
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178. We don't want
the manager.
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179. We want coleslaw.
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180. I'll get the manager.
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181. Is there a problem?
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182. Uh, my wife ordered coleslaw
and got potato salad.
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183. I'm sorry
for the misunderstanding,
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184. but that meal comes with
potato salad.
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185. But I ordered coleslaw.
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186. But it comes with
potato salad.
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187. We'd be happy
to sell you
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188. a side of coleslaw
for 79 cents,
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189. you just have
to get back in line.
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190. Never go out on the day
they give out welfare checks.
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191. You got a thousand paper cups
of coleslaw back there.
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192. You can't take this back
and bring her one?
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193. Know what? Never mind.
Just bring me a bowl—
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194. I'll have some of his
coleslaw. Not a problem.
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195. No, no,
can't do that, ma'am.
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196. We have a no-sharing policy.
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197. So what
you're telling me
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198. is that I can't have
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199. some of my husband's
coleslaw?
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200. That's what you're
saying to me?
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201. You could, but we would
have to ask you to leave.
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202. Heh. You know...
You know what?
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203. You know what?
I eat at home.
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204. That's why I cook
my own meals.
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205. I'll get you
coleslaw.
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206. Is there anything else?
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207. Enjoy your meal.
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208. What the hell—
Does he think he's Mr. T?
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209. Why is he acting like that?
It's okay.
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210. This is our night,
it's our night.
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211. You're right.
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212. Oh, man.
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213. What's that?
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214. It's my baby.
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215. You can't bring
that baby here.
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216. Would you be quiet,
and let me handle this?
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217. You can't bring
that baby here.
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218. It'll just be
for a little while.
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219. Did you bring something back
to eat? I'm hungry.
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220. I forgot your mother put some
chicken in the oven for you.
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221. I'm gonna run and get you guys
something to eat.
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222. Watch the baby, okay?
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223. You can't leave
your baby here.
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224. Why not?
Because you're
babysitting.
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225. I'm just going down
to Lincoln Fried Chicken.
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226. What if he gets hungry?
Or throws up?
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227. He won't— It'll be fine.
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228. I'll be right back.
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229. At that moment, I was sure
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230. of two things:
I wasn't gonna be fine,
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231. and she wasn't gonna be
right back.
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232. What's this?
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233. Why didn't they just
give you a cup of coleslaw?
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234. It's this big.
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235. It'll be here
in a few minutes.
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236. Where you going?
I'm going to check
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237. on the kids.
The kids are fine...
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238. I'm just going to check, okay?
Copy !req
239. Whoa— A behind the back,
off the backboard dunk!
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240. Chris, man,
you're missing it!
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241. Come on!
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242. Shh, would you be quiet?
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243. Stop yelling
and turn the TV down.
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244. You think she's coming back?
She better.
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245. Hello.
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246. Hey, baby, how's it going?
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247. Good.
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248. Is that a baby?
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249. No, it's the TV.
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250. Oh. Well, where's Yvette?
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251. She's in the bathroom.
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252. Okay. We'll be home
in a little while, all right?
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253. Okay.
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254. Okay, love you.
All right, bye.
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255. I know you're thinking:
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256. "Why didn't I just tell
my mother what was going on?"
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257. Well, I figured
it couldn't get any worse.
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258. Hi, um, is Yvette here?
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259. She just left.
And who are you?
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260. I'm Mario.
Is that my baby?
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261. I don't know, is it?
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262. I know.
He takes after his mom.
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263. We didn't know
if it was his baby, either.
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264. But trust me, there ain't
no black man picking up a baby
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265. that ain't his.
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266. What's he doing here?
Where did she go?
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267. She went to get us
something to eat.
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268. She's babysitting us.
My boy...
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269. Where you think
you're going?
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270. You can't just leave
with somebody's baby.
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271. Look,
when she comes back,
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272. tell her I'll be over
my mother's house.
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273. Whoa! Chris,
you should've seen it!
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274. Bernard King hit a shot
from the top of the key,
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275. stole it and hit another one
right before the half!
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276. I'm hungry.
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277. Sometimes my father
would be so focused
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278. on everything going right,
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279. he didn't realize
he was the reason
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280. it was going wrong.
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281. It's okay.
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282. Your coleslaw will be here
any minute.
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283. Why do you make
such a big deal out of nothing?
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284. Because I spent good money
on this.
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285. I expect it to be good.
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286. Well, is it about the money
or is it about me?
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287. Why would you
even ask me that?
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288. We have been waiting
30 minutes
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289. for a Dixie Cup
full of coleslaw.
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290. Think about it.
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291. Never mind.
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292. Oh, finally!
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293. Enjoy your coleslaw.
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294. I'm sorry.
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295. I don't get to take you out
as much as I'd like.
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296. It's okay, baby.
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297. I just want everything
to be right.
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298. But as long as I'm with you,
everything's perfect.
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299. I love you—
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300. Everybody down!
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301. Get down!
Now!
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302. Damn it!
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303. Hey.
Hey.
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304. Isn't it funny how
irresponsible people think
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305. they can change the world
with chicken?
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306. Chris, man, this is the
best game I ever seen.
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307. You gotta come watch.
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308. Chris,
where's the baby?
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309. His father took him.
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310. You gave my baby
to a stranger?
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311. No, to his father.
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312. That could be anybody.
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313. He asked for you
at the door.
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314. And the baby said
"Da-Da."
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315. Who else could it be?
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316. I don't know!
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317. Where'd they go?
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318. To his mother's house.
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319. I know—
You'll be right back.
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320. Whoo! Yeah!
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321. As bad as things were going,
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322. I could always count on
one person to make things go
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323. from bad to worse.
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324. Hello?
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325. Hello? I'm looking
for my parents.
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326. They're having dinner
there tonight.
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327. I think you got
the wrong number.
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328. This ain't no restaurant.
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329. Tonya,
what are you doing?
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330. Hey! What are you doing?
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331. I'm calling Mom.
I'm answering the phone!
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332. Are you trying
to mess everything up?
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333. You gonna mess everything up.
Just put the money in there!
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334. Mom said call
if anything went wrong.
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335. Something went wrong,
so I'm calling.
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336. Tonya, no.
They're on a date.
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337. If you call, you're
gonna mess everything up.
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338. Then Mama will be mad at Dad,
Dad will be mad at me.
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339. Just let me
handle this, okay?
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340. All I know is
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341. somebody better
French braid my hair.
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342. Give me the money,
big man!
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343. Just watch where
you point that thing.
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344. Don't tell me
where to watch.
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345. I'll point this
wherever I want.
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346. Julius,
just be quiet.
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347. You better listen
to your girl.
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348. Hey, that's not my girl,
that's my wife.
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349. Hey, man, come on,
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350. just get the money
and let's go.
Copy !req
351. No, man over here
trying to be a hero.
Copy !req
352. Hey, come on,
I got this.
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353. I got this.
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354. Chelle?
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355. Huh?
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356. Is that you?
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357. It's me, Ricky!
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358. Remember? From Flatbush!
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359. I'm sorry, I-I don't believe
I know who you are.
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360. I used to be at the club
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361. with Shine and them,
remember?
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362. We used to pop lock.
Copy !req
363. Remember?
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364. Ricky Edwards?
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365. Donna's brother!
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366. Yeah! Yeah!
How you been?
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367. Oh, good till now.
How you been?
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368. Oh, I'm hanging in there.
Copy !req
369. All right.
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370. Hey, since you all
so tight,
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371. why don't you
just let us slide?
Copy !req
372. Hey, man, if it was up to me,
I would.
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373. But my partner... crazy.
Copy !req
374. So you all going to have
to put something in the bag.
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375. Why don't we pretend
we put something in the bag?
Copy !req
376. Because this ain't
no pretend robbery!
Copy !req
377. Julius, just give him
the money.
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378. Um, can you just leave us
a little for the babysitter?
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379. You know how it is.
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380. You got kids?
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381. Boy, I got three!
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382. Two boys
and a girl!
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383. Kids, they a blessing.
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384. Yeah,
love of my life.
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385. Dig. Look,
just give me 20.
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386. Hurry up
before my man see you.
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387. Give him, give him!
Hurry, before my partner sees.
Copy !req
388. Chelle...
It was good seeing you, girl.
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389. Aw, you too, man.
Copy !req
390. Hey!
Don't tell nobody I did this.
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391. Hello.
Hi.
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392. Is Yvette here?
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393. Who are you?
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394. I'm her mother.
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395. I came to pick up
the baby.
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396. His father took him.
Where's Yvette?
Copy !req
397. She said
she'll be right back.
Copy !req
398. Then again, she said that
30 minutes ago.
Copy !req
399. You mind if I come in
and wait for her?
Copy !req
400. Come in.
Copy !req
401. Is everybody okay?
Copy !req
402. No, we're not okay, man,
Copy !req
403. we just got robbed.
Julius...
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404. After everything that happened,
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405. you would expect
my mother's reaction
Copy !req
406. to be a little like this...
Copy !req
407. You are such a brave man.
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408. Oh, baby, thank you
for taking me to dinner
Copy !req
409. and standing up
to those robbers.
Copy !req
410. Oh, baby,
I love you so much.
Copy !req
411. Instead, it went
a little something like this.
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412. Are you crazy?
Copy !req
413. What was you thinking, arguing
with a masked gunman?
Copy !req
414. You could have
been killed!
Copy !req
415. Do you think
I got married
Copy !req
416. to raise three kids
by myself?
Copy !req
417. The next time somebody
tries to rob us...
Copy !req
418. get robbed!
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419. Let's go!
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420. Here's a coupon for
a free meal
Copy !req
421. if you decide
to come back again.
Copy !req
422. Thanks, man.
Julius!
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423. Take two.
Good luck.
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424. What happened to
your hair?
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425. Yvette said she was
gonna teach me
Copy !req
426. how to French braid.
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427. Does Yvette live with you?
Copy !req
428. Yes. Why?
Copy !req
429. My mama said
if I have a baby
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430. before I get married,
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431. she says
she's putting me out
Copy !req
432. because she ain't raising
no babies.
Copy !req
433. You like raising babies?
No.
Copy !req
434. How come you
didn't put her out?
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435. How old are you?
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436. Nine.
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437. I'll get it!
Copy !req
438. You mother's here.
Copy !req
439. Chris, this is the best game
I ever seen!
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440. You gotta come watch!
Copy !req
441. How come you didn't tell me
you were babysitting?
Copy !req
442. Why are you in my business?
Copy !req
443. You live in my house,
you don't have any business.
Copy !req
444. I don't have
to live at your house.
Copy !req
445. I'll move in
with Mario.
Copy !req
446. You think
Mario's mother
Copy !req
447. wants to deal with you?
You need a job.
Copy !req
448. Why do you think
I'm babysitting?
Copy !req
449. You weren't even here.
Copy !req
450. I was coming right back.
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451. Hey, hey!
That's enough.
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452. Excuse me?
You gotta leave,
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453. and take that baby with you.
Fine!
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454. Not you, her.
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455. I don't know if that's
such a good idea.
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456. If my mom comes home
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457. and finds out
what happened,
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458. she's gonna ask me
why I didn't tell her.
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459. And I'm gonna say
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460. because my dad
told me not to.
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461. And then she's gonna
curse him out and kill me.
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462. When are you
coming home?
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463. As soon as his
mom and dad come back.
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464. Are you still
gonna teach me
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465. how to French braid
my hair?
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466. Yeah. Heh.
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467. Oh, Chris, why don't you
go watch your game?
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468. Three, two, one!
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469. Oh, man!
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470. That was a good game!
Heh, heh.
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471. What are you doing here?
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472. I came for the makeover!
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473. Everything went okay?
Everything went so good.
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474. We had so much fun.
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475. Good!
They were good.
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476. We should do it
again.
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477. For sure!
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478. Maybe we could go
to a movie next time.
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479. I wanted this to be
a good night for my parents.
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480. and I didn't want my father to
think I couldn't handle things.
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481. So I decided to keep
everything that happened...
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482. to myself.
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483. Yvette,
are you free next Friday?
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484. No, no, no, no, no!
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485. She left us to go get a baby.
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486. When she came back,
she burnt your chicken.
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487. Then, this guy came
to the door asking for the baby.
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488. His name was Mario
and was the baby's father.
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489. When he left,
she came back,
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490. and the baby wasn't here.
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491. She went
to get the baby back,
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492. her mother came to the door
looking for her and the baby.
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493. They had a fight
about where to live.
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494. She said she'd live at Mario's
house. Who is Mario?
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495. When she came back,
she braided Tonya's hair.
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496. Drew got to watch the game,
you guys came back.
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497. She's trying to make it look
like everything
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498. was all peachy and fine.
It's not!
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499. I told you we should have
let Chris babysit.
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500. Girl, give me
my money back.
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501. I'mma kick her ass.
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502. Hold my wig.
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503. Stay tuned for scenes
from our next episode.
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