Elsbeth 1x4

1. You said you'd find me the man of my dreams.

2. Lainey,

3. this man is worth over $100 million

4. and has all his hair.

5. Look at his nose.

6. Okay, yes, maybe it's a little crooked.

7. Short.

8. His nose is too short for me to look at.

9. I've been to five weddings this year, Margo. Five.

10. And not one of those brides

11. has spent hundreds of thousands of dollars

12. on a matchmaker like I have.

13. What is the problem?

14. Is it me?

15. Of course it's not.

16. Okay. We all have

17. our own unique love journeys.

18. As long as you continue to believe—

19. "--and refuse to settle for the wrong person,

20. then Cupid will hit the bullseye."

21. Yes, I read your book. It was another $35.

22. I will continue searching. But you've got to understand,

23. finding a man who spends his free time

24. protecting the coral reef,

25. has good teeth, and flies private takes time.

26. You have until the end of the year.

27. Lainey—

28. And if you don't find me my perfect guy,

29. I will tell everyone that Margo Clarke,

30. the "Goddess of Love," is a fraud.

31. Hey!

32. Officer, what do you think you're doing?

33. This is handicap.

34. I'm on anti-depressants.

35. Excuse...

36. Ma'am, let go of my arm.

37. I'm only gonna tell you once.

38. How rude!

39. That's it. Let's go. Now you're coming with me.

40. Oh! Oh, so now you're arresting me? Mm-hmm.

41. Didn't they teach you to deescalate in the academy?

42. Unbelievable.

43. What's your name?

44. I used to think a man like you couldn't possibly exist.

45. Well, I do, my darling.

46. And now that I've found you, I never want us to be apart.

47. Lainey Anne Belfort...

48. you are the most amazing woman I have ever known.

49. And I want you to be my wife.

50. Oh, my God. Will you marry me?

51. Yes! Yes!

52. Yes! Oh!

53. Thank you.

54. The Goddess of Love has answered your prayer.

55. You made good time.

56. Well, it's freezing out. No one's on the roads. Whew.

57. Hey, I thought we agreed you'd speak Aussie at all times.

58. Come on, it's fine. No one's here.

59. What'd you have me come all the way out here for?

60. It's safer.

61. I had these drawn up.

62. Oh, come on. Divorce papers?

63. Yeah. It's your one-year anniversary.

64. Ya made it.

65. Now you can divorce Lainey and skip town

66. with a sizable amount of her money.

67. Minus my sizable cut.

68. No, I can't do it.

69. What do you mean you can't do it?

70. The stage has been set.

71. You've been picking fights with her like we rehearsed, right?

72. Yeah, and I hated it.

73. The thing is, I love her.

74. How? I just do.

75. And I want her to know the real me, you know?

76. You're an Uber driver

77. who never finished a full semester of community college.

78. Lainey already knows I'm broke. No.

79. She thinks your "crypto exchange" went bust.

80. She also thinks you have

81. a wealthy family in Brisbin

82. and fancy degrees. Ya don't. Yeah, well, listen,

83. our relationship ain't about all that.

84. She loves me for me.

85. Lainey isn't capable of real love.

86. And even if she were,

87. how do you think she'd feel about you defrauding her?

88. Well, then, I'd tell her that she changed me.

89. I changed you!

90. Have you thought about what this would do to my business?

91. My reputation, if she found out you're my low-rent Frankenstein?

92. Lainey is a good person. She'll look past all of that.

93. Women with trust funds aren't good people.

94. I'm willing to take that risk.

95. Stop!

96. Don't do this.

97. The truth will land us both in prison.

98. I'm done lying!

99. Oh, my God.

100. Ms. Tascioni.

101. Oh, sorry. I just love little tchotchkes like this.

102. That's a Yiddish word, it means—

103. I know what it means.

104. Right. Sorry.

105. You were saying?

106. An Australian man named Gabriel Erwood,

107. whom I happen to know,

108. didn't come home last night.

109. And his wife is understandably worried.

110. Who's lead on the case?

111. You are.

112. Me?

113. But I-I mean, I'm-I'm not a detective.

114. Prove yourself today and maybe one day you will be.

115. Uh...

116. Is there evidence of foul play?

117. No. He's just missing.

118. Um, In New York, doesn't an adult

119. have to face a credible risk of harm

120. to be considered "missing"?

121. His wife, Lainey Belfort,

122. is a major donor to my foundation.

123. Oh, so this is a favor.

124. A visit from a uniformed officer

125. in the company of Ms. Tascioni with her consent decree

126. will demonstrate to Ms. Belfort that we are taking

127. her husband's disappearance seriously.

128. Well, Captain, there's probably a logical explanation

129. for Mr. Erwood's failure to come home.

130. And I trust you'll approach this matter

131. as any good detective would.

132. I'll do my best.

133. Me, too.

134. I know some men ignore their wives' calls,

135. but not Gabriel.

136. Has he ever disappeared before?

137. No, never. We have been inseparable

138. since the moment that we met. Aw.

139. That is so sweet.

140. And how did you first get involved

141. with Captain Wagner's foundation?

142. Um, my accountant. It's a great cause

143. and I needed a tax write-off.

144. Um, I'm sorry, what does this have to do

145. with my husband's disappearance?

146. Oh, nothing. You know, just getting background.

147. Okay. Anything unusual

148. happen last night?

149. Uh...

150. We got in an argument. I know how that sounds, but—

151. What was the argument about?

152. Gabriel's crypto business is going through a rough patch.

153. It's, uh, it's put him on edge.

154. It got really ugly.

155. Does your husband have anyone he might've consulted

156. about his problems?

157. A best friend, a relative?

158. I'm his best friend.

159. All his family's in Australia and they're estranged.

160. Uh, we have one, we have one mutual friend,

161. but she's not in town right now.

162. Her apartment is being renovated.

163. Oh, where is she?

164. This is the Hamptons?

165. It hardly seems worth that long a drive.

166. If it were summertime, you'd get it.

167. Oh, now, this makes more sense.

168. Let's go.

169. I wouldn't call us "friends," really.

170. Um, I introduced them. I'm a professional matchmaker.

171. Hmm. Oh, my gosh, look at this.

172. Is this your book? It is.

173. You wrote this?

174. I did.

175. Wow, this looks great.

176. Who does the audiobook?

177. Viola Davis?

178. I do.

179. Wow, that's nice.

180. Can I keep this?

181. Sure. Thanks.

182. Did you still see Lainey and Gabriel after they got married?

183. Oh, yes.

184. Um, after I make a match,

185. I often become the therapist and confidante.

186. And it's so like Lainey to freak out

187. and call the cops, but I can't blame her

188. after the nasty fight they had.

189. Oh, you heard about that?

190. Uh, if you must know,

191. Gabriel came by here and told me all about it.

192. Out here? And what time was that?

193. Um...

194. sometime before it got dark.

195. Uh, but it gets so dark so early this time of year.

196. He was so upset, he wanted to...

197. talk in person. Excuse me.

198. What are you doing?

199. Uh, your rug.

200. It's missing.

201. See, there's an outline

202. where a rug used to be.

203. You're very observant.

204. Oh, no, not really.

205. I just, uh, notice things that are odd.

206. Uh, there was a rug,

207. but I decided I didn't like the color.

208. Uh-huh.

209. I have so many fond childhood memories,

210. sitting by a warm fire on a cozy rug.

211. Or was that a movie?

212. No, that was me.

213. This fire doesn't have

214. the woodsy smell I remember, though.

215. I guess it depends

216. on what you're burning.

217. Did you grow up around here?

218. Um, gosh, no.

219. Peoria. That's in Illinois.

220. You know the old line,

221. "But will it play in Peoria?"

222. And does it?

223. Not usually, no.

224. Peoria is certainly not

225. the Hamptons.

226. Well, nothing is, is it?

227. Oh, no, siree. Well...

228. I ordered a new rug, if that makes you feel any better.

229. Oh, where from?

230. Does it matter?

231. Oh, I just thought I could do some shopping,

232. since I have to furnish an apartment,

233. if I can ever find one.

234. Ooh, New York real estate is a beast.

235. Well, the Hamptons Antique Store, where I'm getting my rug,

236. is for people with very discerning taste.

237. I thought you were here to talk about Gabriel.

238. Did Mr. Erwood say anything yesterday

239. that might've indicated where he might've gone?

240. No, but after that fight,

241. I think Gabriel had had enough.

242. Did you tell Lainey that he was here?

243. Uh, Gabriel begged me not to.

244. Now, I noticed you have some security cameras

245. on the perimeter of your house?

246. A few. Yes.

247. Maybe we can take a look?

248. It might give us an idea

249. as to where Gabriel might've gone.

250. Yeah.

251. Good thinking.

252. That's all there is, I'm afraid.

253. You don't have any footage of him getting into the car?

254. Not at that angle.

255. It's a shame.

256. I'm sorry I can't be more helpful.

257. We'll put out a BOLO.

258. See if anyone spotted his car.

259. But you'll let us know if you do hear anything from Gabriel?

260. Of course.

261. We'll see ourselves out.

262. Thank you for your time.

263. We found his car.

264. You did? Where?

265. At a bus stop in the Hamptons.

266. A bus stop? Gabriel's never

267. taken public transportation in his life.

268. It's possible he left his car there

269. and was picked up by someone else.

270. You mean another woman?

271. No. No way.

272. We don't know yet, but it's not uncommon

273. for a man to leave town for some unknown reason.

274. It doesn't mean there's a real case to investigate.

275. But what was he doing in the Hamptons?

276. He went to Margo's first to talk.

277. Why didn't Margo tell me?

278. I think she was trying to protect your feelings.

279. Oh, he was gonna leave me.

280. He was gonna leave me because we had that fight.

281. We don't know about that, but you know men.

282. Bruised egos.

283. They need time.

284. God, I'm such a bitch.

285. No. Margo always kept warning me

286. "You've got to stop driving men away."

287. And, look, here I am.

288. When you do hear from Gabriel,

289. please let us know.

290. Lainey Belfort?

291. I'm Lainey.

292. Uh, your husband booked a couples massage.

293. Happy anniversary.

294. He must've booked this a while ago, because—

295. Nope, he booked it yesterday.

296. Kickoff for a special celebration?

297. I told you, he didn't just run off.

298. Oh, God. Something terrible must've happened to him.

299. Seems like you got a real case now.

300. Hmm.

301. We think Gabriel was the victim of foul play.

302. Because he booked a massage?

303. Or because some lady's rug was missing?

304. Yes.

305. Did we also mention there was a fire going in the fireplace?

306. Yes, you did. In the middle of winter, no less.

307. You don't think there's cause for a search

308. of Margo's property?

309. Based on what I've heard so far?

310. Not even close.

311. But she was the last one to see Gabriel.

312. He hasn't come home?

313. You are talking about Gabriel Erwood, right?

314. Elsbeth Tascioni, meet my wife,

315. Claudia Payne.

316. So nice to meet you.

317. I love your scarf, your earrings,

318. your name, everything about you.

319. Well, aren't you a slice of heaven?

320. It's a pleasure.

321. Did he tell that you we were at Gabriel and Lainey's wedding?

322. That must've been quite the event.

323. It was all right.

324. It's not easy to impress people in this city,

325. which is why we have to go over

326. those place settings for the gala.

327. Oh, that's why she's here,

328. tormenting me.

329. My husband did tell you

330. about our foundation gala,

331. right? No.

332. No? Oh, and it's this weekend. No.

333. You have to come.

334. Um, oh, no. No, no, no. Oh, no.

335. I'm, um, not really a gala gal.

336. I insist.

337. Please. Bring a date.

338. I am still new in town.

339. So I haven't really met any gala date types yet.

340. Oh, that's just because you haven't been looking.

341. Elsbeth has other things to focus on.

342. Sweetheart, if you please, just give us a minute.

343. Yes, of course. I'll go pick on Noonan.

344. And then it's place settings.

345. I'm not kidding. All right.

346. I do find it hard to believe

347. that Gabriel walked out on Lainey.

348. They were so in love.

349. Not helping, Claudia.

350. Okay.

351. I'll see you this weekend, Elsbeth.

352. She's serious about this, isn't she?

353. Deadly.

354. Oh, no. Ms. Tascioni,

355. no judge is gonna issue a search warrant

356. for a missing rug. You know that.

357. Then let's set up a detail. On the matchmaker?

358. Yeah, then maybe we could witness something

359. that would trigger a warrant.

360. Ah, we don't even know if a crime was committed.

361. Look, show me credible evidence of violence

362. or harm and then I'll put a detective on it.

363. Until then, there's nothing I can do.

364. Follow me.

365. Why are we sneaking around?

366. Just... come on.

367. Oh, okay.

368. Hmm. Wait.

369. Um, what is that?

370. Oh.

371. I got tired of the brick wall,

372. so I got this digital window thingy online.

373. My son helped me

374. pick out the vistas over the phone.

375. Oh, he has such an eye.

376. It's nice, isn't it?

377. It is.

378. So is that why you brought me in here...?

379. Oh, no.

380. I think we need to go back

381. and figure out how Gabriel's car

382. got to that bus stop.

383. We saw it leave Margo's house.

384. Right.

385. We saw his car leave.

386. You think there was someone

387. other than Gabriel behind the wheel,

388. and they left it at the bus stop

389. to make it look like he skipped town.

390. There's my Detective Kaya.

391. Let's go.

392. Mm, mm-mm.

393. Come on.

394. I've got reports to file.

395. And we didn't exactly get the go-ahead from the captain.

396. Right.

397. Okay, I don't want to get you in trouble.

398. You just go without me.

399. Are you sure? I'm serious.

400. Okay.

401. I'll report back. Okay.

402. Oh, wait, one more thing. Mm-hmm.

403. How do I get to the Hamptons by myself?

404. Is there a train? Maybe a trolley?

405. Most people set out

406. into the dating wilderness

407. without the proper arrows in their quiver.

408. Having just one— looks, money, or personality—

409. is not enough to hit the bullseye.

410. Okay, thank you, Chris.

411. And you're sure you never saw him?

412. Ma'am, it's the off-season. Limited service.

413. Only a few regulars on board.

414. And none of them look like that guy.

415. Guys like that usually fly out by helicopter.

416. Helicopter.

417. That's how it's worth the drive.

418. Rich people don't.

419. Well, thanks for the ride.

420. All right. And you'll be sure

421. to show his photo to the other drivers just in case?

422. Sure thing. You know what's funny?

423. The word "jitney."

424. It sounds so fun and old-timey,

425. but it's really just a nice bus with a bathroom, isn't it?

426. 'Cause— Oh, sorry, you have to go.

427. Okay, bye.

428. See ya.

429. Drive safe! Bye.

430. Margo Clarke? Mm-hmm.

431. Yes, she bought another rug.

432. It's on order.

433. I told her if she wants the same one,

434. she'll have to wait.

435. What do you mean "the same one"?

436. She ordered the same rug that she had.

437. Huh. 'Cause she told me—

438. you know, as her friend—

439. that, uh, she just didn't like the color.

440. My dear, each rug is an individual work of art.

441. Technically the same and yet... different.

442. I don't know why she tired of the first one.

443. It looked exquisite in the magazine.

444. "Magazine"?

445. Hampton's Quarterly.

446. They did a whole feature on Margo last month.

447. Hmm. That table is a Chippendale, you know.

448. Oh. A steal at 10,000.

449. I'm between apartments right now.

450. But can I keep this?

451. Yeah. Thank you.

452. Oh.

453. Oh, Margo!

454. Hi! It's me.

455. It's Elsbeth. Right.

456. Elsbeth.

457. You should think about changing it.

458. What are you doing here?

459. You were right about the Hamptons.

460. So pricey.

461. But everyone here is super friendly.

462. Until you talk to them for too long.

463. Yeah, well,

464. we're not used to having visitors this time of year.

465. Arthur? Oh, good news.

466. Arthur says he's working on getting you

467. your rug as soon as possible.

468. Good.

469. I came to check and you did it for me.

470. The sooner I get it, the sooner I can get back

471. to enjoying those woodsy fires.

472. But funny, though, um,

473. he said that you ordered the same rug,

474. but I thought you said you just didn't like the color.

475. Mm, you misunderstood.

476. The colors in the old rug, they were losing their vibrancy.

477. I want new.

478. Oh, I see. Out with the old...

479. Art? Art.

480. So, how's Lainey?

481. She still strong-arming the police?

482. New information came in that makes her think

483. that Gabriel intended to celebrate their anniversary.

484. Huh.

485. Is that fireplace cleaner?

486. It's— Okay, what...?

487. It's for my allergies.

488. The ashes, they aggravate them.

489. That stuff's great, if you've been burning

490. something nasty in there.

491. What's this new information?

492. Do they think something happened to Gabriel?

493. I think a formal investigation is imminent.

494. And operating under the consent decree,

495. I need to make sure they... look in the right direction.

496. Elsbeth— love that name—

497. how do you feel about a nice, cold walk?

498. Oh. Okay.

499. I could've told you that Gabriel had something special

500. planned for their anniversary.

501. That's the kind of man he was.

502. But after their argument, he couldn't go through with it.

503. It was that bad?

504. Lainey has a ferocious temper.

505. Ah. Nothing ever satisfies her.

506. I almost dropped her as a client many times because of it.

507. Really? Yeah.

508. It'd be easier to find a match for you.

509. Ma... You're so upbeat.

510. So simple.

511. Well, it may seem like that, but there's a lot more

512. going on inside here, believe me.

513. Ah, I think I do.

514. And the men who are turned on by that, well...

515. they can be a little crazy.

516. It doesn't end well.

517. Yeah, well, love hurts. Oh, yeah.

518. And lawyers always end up having sex on top of desks.

519. You never see the stapler, until it's too late.

520. Oh, hi.

521. Oh, wow.

522. Nothing like catching the big fish, is there?

523. Have a good day.

524. Anyway, you know all about how hard dating is.

525. I mean, you know everything.

526. So, I need a date for a fundraiser this weekend.

527. Uh, do you think you could help me?

528. I mean, what do you charge?

529. I'm sorry, I've got a months-long waiting list.

530. Plus, I suspect I'm gonna have my hands full with Lainey.

531. You know, repeat business.

532. But she and Gabriel might work it out.

533. No, that marriage is over.

534. Hi.

535. Every bus driver swore

536. Gabriel Erwood never got on a bus, so someone

537. wants to make it look like he took a bus when he didn't.

538. Huh. And did you know?

539. The Jitney does wine tours.

540. No... Ms. Tascioni?

541. Before you book any tours,

542. there's someone here you should meet.

543. This is Detective Darren Jax,

544. Suffolk County PD.

545. He just informed us we no longer need

546. to search for Gabriel Erwood.

547. You found him? You could say that.

548. A couple fishermen found your guy's body

549. a mile or so off of Georgica Beach.

550. He drowned? He might have,

551. if he hadn't been murdered first.

552. Cause of death is blunt force trauma to the head.

553. One hit from behind, no signs of struggle. Do they know

554. what he was hit with? Something made of heavy brass.

555. Brass? How do you know that?

556. They pulled a piece of it from his skull.

557. You want to take that home with you?

558. No, it's evidence.

559. Can I?

560. I was kidding.

561. Do we know a time of death?

562. A couple days ago. Now, he was dead

563. before he hit the water.

564. And here's the best part:

565. his name isn't Gabriel Erwood.

566. What do you mean?

567. According to fingerprint and dental records—

568. from the few real teeth left in his mouth—

569. the victim is one Dennis Pagano

570. from Teaneck, New Jersey.

571. Yeah.

572. I wanted to see your faces.

573. Well? Oh. Dennis Pagano,

574. with a record of petty crime.

575. Shoplifting, forgery.

576. But he seemed to leave all that behind

577. when he became Gabriel Erwood of Brisbane, Australia.

578. And I was at their wedding.

579. Has anyone told Lainey?

580. I did.

581. She didn't take it well.

582. You get your wish.

583. Detective Jax is gonna search Margo's house in the Hamptons,

584. and Lainey's, too.

585. Lainey has one, too?

586. They all have one.

587. You don't really think Lainey killed Gabriel, do you?

588. It doesn't matter what I think.

589. Suffolk County is in charge now.

590. Well... So, you stay out of their way.

591. This a real murder investigation now.

592. Yep, and now it belongs to another department.

593. Just my luck. Well, that detective

594. is gonna focus on Lainey, won't he?

595. Oh, the spouse is always a suspect.

596. Gabriel and Lainey were one of Margo's big success stories.

597. If anyone found out he was a fraud,

598. it would ruin Margo's reputation.

599. That's a good motive, but without proof,

600. what can we do? Elsbeth.

601. Lainey?

602. Margo always did a thorough background check.

603. That's what she was paid for.

604. So she must have known that Gabriel was an imposter.

605. Um, come here.

606. I opened up my heart,

607. my investment portfolio, for this man,

608. and he was from New Jersey?

609. I'm gonna kill Margo.

610. Shh— whoa, whoa. I wouldn't say things like that.

611. Why not? Those other cops

612. are already treating me like a killer.

613. Well, they probably think you found out

614. Dennis was a fraud and you killed him.

615. I can't be their only suspect.

616. This is insane.

617. A guy from New Jersey must have enemies

618. the cops don't know about. And the police

619. will look for them. They'd better, 'cause if not,

620. I'm gonna end up in a tiny little jail cell like this.

621. I just found someone who knows more about Dennis Pagano.

622. Who? His girlfriend.

623. I don't know what trouble

624. Dennis has gotten himself into,

625. but whatever it is, he's on his own.

626. I ain't bailing him out again, okay?

627. He's dead to me.

628. Actually, he's dead to everyone.

629. He's been murdered.

630. And you're coming here because you think

631. I had something to do with it?

632. No one's accusing you.

633. Good, because I've barely seen him in weeks,

634. and I've been working here every night.

635. You can ask.

636. The police don't know who did it yet, but they will.

637. And I am so sorry.

638. Oh, God.

639. Dennis.

640. Boy.

641. This is just the kind of thing that always happens to me.

642. Well, it, uh, serves him right

643. for dumping me after everything we been through.

644. So, you've been together a long time?

645. 14 years.

646. Things had been great between us this last year.

647. He finally had a steady job.

648. And what kind of steady job?

649. Some rich lady hired him to be her driver,

650. like he did for Uber.

651. She had him working all the time.

652. He had to live there to be on call.

653. The money was good, so I didn't complain.

654. He said it would be temporary.

655. But then, last week,

656. he tells me he's leaving me for her.

657. Said he didn't want to live a lie anymore. You believe that?

658. What do you think he meant by that?

659. That he'd been cheating on me this whole time.

660. I should have known when he started

661. getting better-looking and acting all sneaky.

662. Lying bastard.

663. Acting sneaky how?

664. Hiding his phone from me, locking his file cabinet.

665. Oh, there's a file cabinet?

666. Maybe we can take a look at it?

667. If you know how to break a lock, it's yours.

668. So, Tina said Dennis didn't want to live a lie anymore.

669. So maybe "Gabriel" came clean to Margo

670. about who he really was.

671. Yes.

672. Exactly. Margo would be livid.

673. Mm. Yes. She would know

674. that that kind of revelation could ruin her business.

675. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Her whole brand.

676. So she got so angry Mm-hmm.

677. that she picked-up a brass...

678. Candlestick.

679. Yes. Yes.

680. She picked up a brass candlestick and then...

681. wham!

682. Killed him in the study while Colonel Mustard looked on.

683. I used to love that game.

684. Oh.

685. Mrs. Peacock. Check this out.

686. Brand-new teeth.

687. What? Mm-hmm. And there's more.

688. Receipts for tattoo removal,

689. fitness training,

690. even a subscription to a virtual dialect coach.

691. And check out the dates.

692. All before he met Lainey.

693. Well, how does an Uber driver afford all this?

694. Credit cards? Isn't that how most people pay for things?

695. No, no. He had a sponsor.

696. Margo. Margo.

697. She helped

698. Dennis Pagano

699. become Gabriel Erwood.

700. But then he wanted to let Lainey in on the secret.

701. Yes. We have to trace these receipts back to Margo.

702. He kept them to make sure she reimbursed him.

703. Mm-hmm. Okay, here's one.

704. Here's another one. Okay.

705. Wow. This one's...

706. Whoa.

707. Find something important?

708. You could say that.

709. This is a handwritten note from Lainey to Gabriel.

710. What's it say?

711. It says, "My darling, if you even think

712. of trying to leave me, I'll kill you."

713. Well, well, well. Good work.

714. But that letter is circumstantial evidence.

715. Textbook. You can't build a case around it.

716. You would still need something concrete

717. to tie Lainey to the murder, and it doesn't exist.

718. Finding out your husband is a scumbag who married you

719. for your money is a hell of a motive, don't you think?

720. What about Margo's estate? Did you find anything?

721. At the matchmaker's? Nah.

722. No blood traces, no DNA, nothing.

723. The rug must have absorbed it all.

724. Kept it from getting on the wood floor.

725. Uh, did you search the fireplace, though?

726. There were rug fibers in there, but, uh... See?

727. She burned the evidence.

728. Lady, I'd love to make that woman a suspect

729. given the way she treated my guys,

730. but I can't do it. She wasn't nice

731. to your officers?

732. Let's just say I'm not surprised

733. Ms. Clarke has a record

734. for assaulting an officer. She does?

735. See, that proves she's capable of violence.

736. It proves she's a pain in the ass.

737. Hey. Look what I got.

738. Margo's arrest record.

739. Ooh! Let me see. Mm-hmm. Oh.

740. So, just different every time?

741. Huh? Oh, yeah.

742. Depends on my mood.

743. And I have a lot of moods.

744. So, Margo's arrest took place

745. right outside Lainey's apartment.

746. Another high-priced consultation with Lainey ordering Margo

747. to find her the perfect husband.

748. So, Margo left... Mm-hmm.

749. and then took out her frustrations

750. on that poor cop,

751. and then got locked in the slammer.

752. But here's the best part.

753. Look at the precinct and the date.

754. Mm-hmm. Something just rang a bell,

755. so I compared it to Dennis Pagano's record.

756. Oh, my God.

757. Dennis Pagano was arrested for shoplifting the same night.

758. They were booked at the same precinct

759. at the same time.

760. So Margo did know Dennis Pagano.

761. I kind of love that they met in jail.

762. That's where Margo found him,

763. and then decided to turn him into Lainey's dream man.

764. Oh, I can't wait to see what she says.

765. Nice investigative work,

766. soon-to-be Detective Blanke.

767. Thank you. Hey.

768. Will you come with me to the fundraiser?

769. I can brag about you to all the detectives.

770. You still haven't found a date?

771. It's hard to meet people in this city.

772. Oh, yeah. So you'll come with me?

773. No. Sorry.

774. Not a gala gal. That's what I said.

775. Huh. Still not going.

776. So, you didn't know Gabriel was really Dennis Pagano?

777. How could I?

778. Well, we took a trip to New Jersey...

779. Oh, sorry to hear that.

780. Yeah, definitely not the Hamptons,

781. but we did learn some fun facts,

782. after spending one night in jail with you,

783. Dennis Pagano went from being a petty criminal

784. to an Australian entrepreneur.

785. With the help of some dental work and a few cosmetic changes.

786. We have the arrest records

787. and the receipts; Dennis saved them all.

788. Probably as proof in case you wanted to...

789. double-cross him.

790. Okay, say I did help jailbird Dennis

791. with a little glow-up.

792. We all do things to make ourselves

793. more appealing, don't we?

794. Or is that your natural color?

795. You created fake investments, social media accounts.

796. Okay.

797. Dennis's makeover might've been extreme,

798. but Lainey was a difficult client.

799. No straight man was gonna go to the trouble

800. of becoming everything she needed without me pushing.

801. So... arrest me.

802. Oh, that's right.

803. You know as well as I do

804. what I did might be fraud—

805. though you'd have trouble making the case

806. without Dennis to corroborate—

807. but it isn't murder.

808. So...

809. Are we done here?

810. Wait.

811. Something's missing, and I know what it is.

812. The rug. We know.

813. No, not the rug.

814. All that Where's Waldo? has finally paid off.

815. Cupid.

816. When you took this photo,

817. there was a darling Cupid on the pedestal.

818. Perfect for your brand,

819. by the way. Oh, that?

820. The photographer thought it was cute.

821. Well, where is it now?

822. Somewhere in storage.

823. I don't like clutter.

824. Oh, gosh.

825. I wish I could be more like that.

826. I'll bet. Yeah.

827. By the way, have you found a date yet

828. for your event?

829. Uh... No. No, I haven't.

830. I am still... well, working on that.

831. A bit of free advice?

832. Focus on love, Ms. Tascioni.

833. More than your career, whatever it is.

834. End of the day, love is all that matters.

835. That Cupid is our candlestick. Mm-hmm.

836. It's probably at the bottom of the ocean somewhere.

837. Oh, my gosh, your detective skills are amazing!

838. I'm not saying we should search the entire ocean.

839. That would be ridiculous. I agree.

840. Just, you know, where the body was found.

841. Uh, how big a radius we talking? Half a mile?

842. Objects tend to drift in the ocean, you know.

843. Half a mile at most. Ah, Ms. Tascioni,

844. the NYPD's Scuba Team is a highly specialized unit.

845. Their job is to perform dangerous rescue operations,

846. not look for brass figurines.

847. It's actually more of a statuette.

848. The answer is no.

849. You realize everything you found

850. makes me look even more guilty.

851. Meeting Dennis' girlfriend also led us

852. to Margo and her motive.

853. You think Margo killed him?

854. We think he was about to defy Margo

855. and tell you the truth.

856. That he's from Jersey?

857. Why?

858. Because he'd really fallen in love with you.

859. He loved me? He did.

860. He didn't want to lie anymore.

861. Sometimes I forget I'm actually lovable.

862. Aw. I bet Margo coached him

863. on everything to do and everything to say.

864. No wonder he was so good in bed.

865. We don't know about that,

866. but, um, we think that she killed him with this.

867. The Cupid.

868. I got that for her, right after we got engaged.

869. That's a nice gift. It's not that nice.

870. I'd spent enough on Margo's retainer.

871. That's actually a knockoff of a bronze one I saw.

872. This one was made of brass?

873. Yeah. How'd you know?

874. It was like $30. Don't tell Margo.

875. Quite the bargain. Mm-hmm.

876. How do you think I stay rich?

877. Oh, yes. Not to worry.

878. I believe I know a dealer in SoHo who has one.

879. The exact same one?

880. It's got to match. Very same.

881. I can have it to you in the morning.

882. Oh, thank God.

883. It's $60,000. I'm sorry, what?

884. Do you need time to think about it?

885. No. I don't do time.

886. Hi. Elsbeth! So glad you could make it.

887. Well, you were so cryptic when you called,

888. I figured this would be worth the drive.

889. Indeed it is.

890. I have found the perfect man for you.

891. What? Really?

892. I thought you said you weren't taking on new clients.

893. I couldn't resist. He's an archaeologist,

894. so you both like nosing into things.

895. He's just back from Kiribati, actually.

896. Oh. Where's that exactly?

897. No idea, but wait till you see his picture.

898. Handsome, right?

899. Oh, he is very...

900. Is that Cupid?

901. Why, yes. Yes, it is.

902. That's the same Cupid that was on the pedestal

903. when you had your photo shoot?

904. Yeah, you were so fond of it, I pulled it out of storage.

905. Huh. But the Cupid in the photo

906. had three arrows in his quiver and this one only has two.

907. And you always want more arrows in your quiver.

908. That's from your book.

909. Yeah, you're mistaken. No. See,

910. if you compare this one with the— whoa—

911. one in the, uh, magazine...

912. Maybe it fell out in storage. No one cares.

913. Yeah, yeah. You're probably right.

914. I do tend to notice things that other people don't.

915. Like... that man's

916. excessive nose hair, and like you say,

917. I wouldn't want to settle for the wrong pers— Whoa. Hey!

918. Careful with that. My God!

919. I'm so sorry. It's just heavier than it looks.

920. Well, it should be. It's solid bronze.

921. Are you sure?

922. Of course, I'm sure. It's an antique.

923. Because Lainey said she bought it for you.

924. As a matter of fact, she did. So?

925. Well, the one Lainey got for you was made of brass.

926. It was a fake, which is kind of ironic

927. when you think about it.

928. But the thing is,

929. the weapon used to kill Dennis was made of brass.

930. A man killed by a brass Cupid.

931. How poetic.

932. But as you can see, this one is made of bronze.

933. Too bad your brass one isn't here,

934. so you can't prove anything.

935. You know what?

936. You can leave.

937. Who could that be? Oh, right.

938. I forgot.

939. Uh, I invited some friends to meet me here.

940. Hi.

941. Uh, this is Jake and Harvey.

942. This is Margo.

943. They found Dennis's body.

944. What are they doing here?

945. Well, I suggested that

946. they go back to their fishing spot

947. with a metal detector.

948. Can you believe the police wouldn't spend the resources?

949. Come on in, gentlemen.

950. And look what they found.

951. See? Three arrows.

952. just like the photo.

953. Although, this one's chipped.

954. Well, my guess is that the missing piece will match

955. the one the coroner found in Dennis's head wound.

956. What is this? Are you arresting me?

957. Uh, no, they are.

958. No. Wait.

959. I can't go from this to prison.

960. Yeah, it won't be the Hamptons,

961. but nothing is, is it?

962. Why did that idiot have to fall in love?

963. Tascioni. Hey.

964. Kaya! Oh, my gosh! Oh, you look amazing. Wow.

965. I do not put heels on for just anybody,

966. so you owe me, just so we're clear.

967. Very clear.

968. Officer Blanke, are you gonna fill the detectives in?

969. According to Tascioni, you basically solved a murder.

970. They have a lot of questions. They want to talk to you.

971. I... Come on.

972. It's the least you can do.

973. Okay. There you go.

974. Yes.

975. Oh.

976. Oh. Okay.

977. Oh. Thank you.

978. Elsbeth. Mm. Mm.

979. Hi. Hi.

980. Are you enjoying yourself? Mm-hmm.

981. I don't know what I'm eating, but it's delicious. Okay.

982. Oh, wow. There are so many important people here.

983. Mm-hmm. Ooh, that guy that Captain Wagner's talking to

984. looks very important. Who's he?

985. That's the owner of FlairAll, that buzzy fast fashion company.

986. He's loaded. Mm.

987. What? Me? Yeah.

988. No. Mm-mm.

989. So, Captain Wagner helps raise money for the foundation, right?

990. Yes. He brings in a lot of major donors.

991. How does he do it?

992. Well, few people say no

993. to talking to an NYPD captain.

994. Oh, I see. He hates the schmoozing part,

995. but sending kids to college on full scholarships,

996. he loves that part.

997. That's so nice. Yeah.

998. Please, excuse me. Of course.

999. Another Shirley Temple, please.

1000. Hello?

1001. I hear Wagner's foundation

1002. is having a big soiree. Mm-hmm.

1003. The food's delicious.

1004. You're there now?

1005. Notice anything suspicious?

1006. Mm...

1007. I'm not sure yet.

1008. It's still early.

1009. She's a little quirky,

1010. but I like that Elsbeth character.

1011. Hmm. You like everybody.

1012. No, really.

1013. She seemed genuinely interested in the foundation.

1014. And in you.

1015. And...

1016. She asked a lot of questions.

1017. That's classic Elsbeth.

1018. That's what she does whenever she's on a case,

1019. pursuing her prey. Mm.

1020. Captioning sponsored by CBS

1021. and TOYOTA.