1. A long time ago, back in the village
when I was a small boy,
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2. a fire was eating the forest.
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3. People running and screaming.
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4. But me, I ran to the river
with my little cup to get water.
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5. They laughed at me.
"What are you doing?"
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6. "What I can!" I shouted
and ran back to pour it on the fire.
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7. Suddenly, a blue box appeared
in the skies over the fire.
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8. And a man stood at the door
with a hosepipe.
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9. Spraying and spraying
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10. until all the fires went out.
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11. He landed the box
in the middle of the burnt forest
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12. and started scattering fresh seeds.
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13. I went over to thank him.
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14. "Are you a farmer?" I asked.
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15. "No. I am the Doctor."
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16. We shook hands. And that's how we met.
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17. - Nice. Good. Great…
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18. Great story.
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19. And you're sure
that this Doctor will come?
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20. Yes.
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21. He always comes when needed.
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22. - Hey!
- Walahi!
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23. The Doctor…
we need him now. It needs feeding.
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24. You need to get me home.
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25. I promise I am doing everything I can to—
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26. Wait.
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27. Oh, why did I not think of this before?
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28. Ah, we can boost the Vindicator
if we go to…
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29. - Of course!
- Go where?
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30. Lagos, Nigeria.
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31. It has the largest communications
technology market in Africa.
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32. And it's near Omo's Palace.
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33. - Omo's Palace?
- My favourite barbershop.
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34. Omo, the owner, is a friend of mine.
We met in a fire.
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35. Barbershop? But the TARDIS does your hair.
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36. It does. It does.
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37. Uh, I don't go there for cuts.
It's hard to explain.
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38. Okay… Try explaining.
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39. Ah. 2019. A great year.
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40. I'm not human.
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41. I am an evolved life-form.
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42. And, uh…
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43. …my body changes a lot.
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44. It's the first time
I've had this Black body.
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45. In some parts of the Earth
I'm now treated differently.
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46. But here, in Africa, in that barbershop,
I'm accepted.
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47. I'm able to forget.
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48. We…
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49. Boy, we…
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50. we laugh. We tell stories. They…
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51. Treat you like one of their own?
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52. Yeah.
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53. My nan took me to India whenever she could
for the same reason.
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54. You say you're not human, but that's
the most human thing ever, Doctor.
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55. Go on then. Take as long as you need.
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56. This is gonna look so nice on you.
So nice.
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57. - Auntie!
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58. - Oh!
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59. I'm good, my guy.
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60. Brother!
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61. Hey!
- Hey! How are you?
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62. Uncle.
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63. How far, now?
- How far, now? You're good?
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64. Yeah.
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65. And that is why
the tortoise has a cracked shell.
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66. Omo?
Doctor.
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67. - Hey!
Come in.
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68. I told you he would come.
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69. You! You ruined the end now.
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70. - It might not be enough.
- Excuse you?
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71. Omo, who does he think he's talking to?
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72. Wait.
You're on the missing posters.
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73. All of you. They're on the walls outside.
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74. Rashid, Tunde, Obioma.
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75. Doctor, you haven't come in years.
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76. And standards have slipped.
Damp and misty outside, dusty in here.
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77. It's not me.
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78. New management.
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79. Welcome.
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80. I've been expecting you.
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81. Welcome to my establishment.
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82. Your establishment?
Why's the street deserted?
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83. Why isn't Obioma leaving?
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84. Why are they on all the missing posters?
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85. They cannot leave.
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86. No one can.
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87. You are the all-knowing Doctor
who is supposed to save us
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88. and you don't know anything, huh?
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89. Save you from what?
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90. Rest… …Obioma.
He hasn't been in years.
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91. He doesn't know.
He never makes appointments.
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92. Yes. Besides,
appointments never work in Africa.
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93. What are you talking about?
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94. Who's next?
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95. Your hair.
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96. We're running out of stories!
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97. Look at his hair.
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98. Me. I've got this.
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99. Once upon a time,
a great musician Yo-Yo Ma,
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100. was travelling through Botswana
collecting local music,
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101. when he heard a shaman singing.
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102. Yo-Yo Ma said,
"Stop. Wow. I have to write this down."
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103. He wrote a bit, then said, "Carry on."
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104. But the shaman
sang a completely different song.
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105. Yo-Yo Ma said, "No. Sing the first one."
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106. The shaman said, "I cannot.
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107. The first time,
an antelope was in the distance.
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108. Clouds covered the sun.
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109. The second time, clouds had gone,
antelope disappear, so the song changed."
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110. You see, in the old days,
music was a live thing.
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111. But after industrial revolution,
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112. people became obsessed with producing
identical things to package time.
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113. But not in Africa.
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114. That is why we say we will come at 1:00
but won't arrive till 3:00.
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115. So, appointments, bad idea.
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116. I don't know how much more I can take.
The tension is getting unbearab—
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117. Wow. Wow.
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118. Incredible.
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119. The drawings in the window
are a visual interpretation of his story.
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120. Cool, right?
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121. Dalek. Cybermen. Weeping Angels.
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122. Uh, you need to be getting a cut
for that to work.
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123. They're all connected.
The windows, chairs, his clippers.
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124. And you must tell a story, Doctor.
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125. We must feed it. It is always hungry.
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126. What is hungry, Omo?
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127. The Barber controls it. Him and Abby.
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128. Uh…
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129. Are we under attack? TARDIS? Hello?
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130. Thank you again, Abby.
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131. Abby?
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132. Every day she brings us food.
We'd be lost without her.
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133. I know that face.
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134. Why do I know your face?
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135. What have I done to—
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136. We know who you are.
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137. Intergalactic busybody Time Lord.
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138. Last of his kind and so on.
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139. So you told them, Omo?
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140. How could I not?
You're the greatest story I know.
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141. Well, if you put it like that.
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142. But why do I know her face? Abby.
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143. The Barber's assistant?
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144. She told me that
they both used to work for her father,
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145. but he was mean, so they left.
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146. Her father?
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147. And they're keeping you here?
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148. Until we reach their destination.
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149. We're travelling?
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150. This is…
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151. Oh, Omo, what is going on?
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152. It's the Barber.
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153. He turned up one day and offered
to give me a haircut in my own shop.
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154. I thought it was a nice thing.
I said, "Okay."
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155. He brought out his own clippers.
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156. And as soon as they touched me, a sort of
current just ran through the whole shop.
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157. And like magic, like witchcraft, it seemed
to transfer itself, its soul to him.
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158. I tried to open the door.
My keys didn't work.
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159. Tried to stop my clients,
but the shop demanded a select few.
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160. The ones who love this place.
They pushed in.
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161. These are men I've known for years.
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162. Decades. They're like sons to me.
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163. I came to get a trim
for my child's naming ceremony.
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164. My wife…
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165. We'd been married for less than a year.
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166. I'm an athlete. Relay, 100 metres.
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167. I came to get a cut for the championship.
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168. I miss my team and my big sister.
She trained me.
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169. My mother is in hospital.
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170. Omo was lending me money for her medicine.
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171. I wanted a fresh cut to see her.
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172. There's someone waiting
for me too, Doctor.
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173. The girl with the blue earrings
the day we met.
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174. We both came to the city together,
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175. but I spent most of my time in here
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176. and not enough with her.
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177. So, whose story
will enchant us now?
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178. I don't— I don't have anything.
- You don't have to say anything.
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179. I'll speak.
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180. Let me out.
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181. Tell a story.
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182. - It's the only way.
- I changed my mind.
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183. Doctor, tell it for us.
It will be easier for you. A big story.
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184. Okay. You want a story
about Weeping Angels and Ice Warriors,
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185. but nothing is more vivid
than an ordinary life.
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186. One person. Belinda.
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187. On any given day, nurses are knackered,
and after a 13-hour shift, she was done.
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188. His pictures are alive.
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189. She was going home,
but she heard something.
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190. Oh, uh, Belinda,
could you take her obs?
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191. We need bloods,
X-ray for her chest and IV fluids.
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192. Hypotensive, systolic's at 89.
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193. Tachycardic is under 100.
Vomited a few times.
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194. Oh, it's okay.
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195. Infection?
Maybe gastroenteritis.
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196. Have you considered steroids?
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197. What, for a chest infection?
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198. No, her fingers.
She's got rheumatoid arthritis.
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199. Might have put herself
in an Addisonian crisis.
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200. Here. Hyperpigmentation.
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201. No, it's too subtle. It's barely there.
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202. Dehydration, nausea, vomiting.
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203. An Addisonian crisis
can present like this.
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204. It happened to my nan.
Without steroids she could die.
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205. You're right. She's yours.
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206. It's my nan's birthday.
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207. All night,
she guarded that frail life.
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208. Sacrificing her own joy…
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209. We're speeding up?
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210. …fighting her tiredness.
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211. Until the doctors wheeled her away.
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212. Two weeks later, Belinda was leaving work.
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213. - Hi, Belinda. Just picking up my pills.
- Hi.
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214. Don't be silly. I'll be there around 7:00.
Love you, Nan.
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215. Oh.
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216. It's you. Up on your feet. Wow.
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217. I know what you did for me.
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218. Well, the doctors took over,
but you saved my life.
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219. Thank you.
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220. The batteries are full.
Fullest they've been since the early days.
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221. First time is the hardest.
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222. From now,
it will be as easy as getting a haircut.
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223. What is happening?
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224. You were right, Omo.
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225. His stories alone
can super-power the engine.
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226. You see? Look.
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227. Look how much his hair has grown.
You can let us go now.
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228. This changes everything.
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229. We'll get there sooner.
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230. You can finally take the throne
and rule fairly. Justly.
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231. I must recalibrate the engine.
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232. Such raw power.
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233. Check the stasis field
for structural damage.
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234. Then let's meet in the engine room.
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235. - It's okay. Just relax, okay?
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236. TARDIS, locate origin! Show source!
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237. The barbershop?
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238. - …now, look at this.
- Oh, no. I don't want any. Thank you.
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239. I'm in a rush. Sorry.
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240. I will give you discount.
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241. Oh!
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242. Ah! Madam, you must pay for this.
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243. Sorry, I…
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244. I have no money.
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245. Who they cause trouble?
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246. You planned this, Omo?
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247. I have to get these men home.
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248. And because I have no home, I'm what?
I'm expendable?
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249. Their families need them.
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250. And I have none, so I don't matter?
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251. No. No, Doctor. Doctor, you have stories.
That's all I was thinking.
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252. I love this shop.
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253. I loved you, Omo.
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254. I thought it was a home for me.
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255. I was safe.
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256. So, he's not here now.
Open the door and go.
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257. We can't.
You can.
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258. - There's nowhere to go.
- I opened it from the outside.
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259. It's different from inside.
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260. - Doctor, Doctor, Doctor—
- Do not talk to me ever again.
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261. I trusted you with both of my hearts,
with everything that I am.
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262. How could you?
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263. Look, it doesn't matter. If he opens
that door, none of us are getting out—
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264. - Got it.
- No!
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265. No!
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266. What the hell is this?
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267. You are confused, aren't you, Doctor?
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268. The shop is in outer space
and in Lagos at the same time.
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269. How?
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270. And that… that structure that I saw?
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271. The Nexus.
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272. I used to call it the World Wide Web
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273. until the humans
named something far uglier after that.
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274. There is a time-space compressor
that goes between,
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275. that is built into the door frame.
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276. That only lets her and myself out.
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277. We control it.
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278. And we're travelling on a spider?
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279. Wait, you saw the beast?
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280. Impossible, but true.
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281. A spider that they control.
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282. Where are we going?
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283. You'll find out soon enough.
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284. Doctor.
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285. It took you long enough.
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286. Alarms on the TARDIS
must have been going off.
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287. Yeah. Nearly blew my ears off.
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288. You're the nurse from his story.
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289. Your companion?
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290. So where have you been?
Did he leave you behind?
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291. Tell you to wait?
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292. No. I told him to go actually.
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293. Wait. You're all missing.
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294. Doctor, what's going on?
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295. - And who is that?
I'm still figuring that one out.
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296. All he has done is stomp around,
giving people awful haircuts.
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297. And… And they are all scared of him.
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298. He…
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299. who hides his identity like a coward.
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300. A troll on the web.
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301. Don't be scared.
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302. We will leave here.
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303. There is nothing that he can do.
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304. He has no real power.
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305. You want to know who I am?
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306. I go by many names.
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307. Anansi, the man-spider.
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308. Saga, the Norse goddess.
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309. Bastet.
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310. Dionysus, the Greek god of theatre.
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311. Even Loki, god of mischief.
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312. I have been them all.
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313. In many cultures,
in many worlds, in many incarnations.
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314. It does not matter what I am called.
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315. It matters who I am, what I do.
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316. - And what is it that you do?
I begin all things!
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317. I am the voice in the empty void.
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318. I am the spark.
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319. The seed. The dark nucleus.
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320. The lie that tells the truth.
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321. The well of words.
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322. The Godfather Griot.
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323. The djeli before.
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324. The tall tale itself.
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325. And this, Doctor…
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326. this…
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327. is my domain.
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328. This barbershop?
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329. Our barbershop?
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330. - Yes.
- And you were all those Story Lords?
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331. Yes.
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332. All those gods. You?
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333. Are you sure?
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334. Yes.
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335. Why are you laughing? What's so funny?
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336. I don't know.
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337. He's lying to you. He's lying.
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338. I met Dionysus.
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339. We drank so much wine,
we caused a drought in Athens.
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340. Saga and I watched Marvel movies
up until Endgame.
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341. She didn't like Thor.
Muscles were too small.
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342. I played chess with Bastet.
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343. I let her think that
she let me let her win.
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344. She kicked my ass thoroughly.
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345. And Anansi purposely lost a bet
to make me marry one of his daughters.
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346. I know the gods.
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347. You are not them.
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348. Tell the truth.
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349. Who are you?
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350. You don't have to answer them.
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351. Look at me. Don't let him get to you.
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352. Who are you?
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353. I was the one behind them all.
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354. It was me.
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355. I was once human.
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356. Whenever we told stories,
the storytelling gods would grow in power.
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357. The gods needed to strengthen
their bonds with humanity.
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358. Wherever they told stories, I went.
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359. I told their myths, their legends.
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360. Cleaned them up, printed them in books
so that the gods could be worshipped.
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361. That was my job.
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362. They only exist now…
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363. because of me.
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364. My work.
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365. - And the Nexus?
- He built that too.
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366. I wanted something
like the brain.
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367. Flexible, strong, that could expand
and make connections between ideas.
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368. So I took a strand of their gods' blood
and essence, and built a model.
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369. A web-like structure that they expanded
to what you saw now,
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370. cross-connecting concepts,
cultures and ideas.
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371. The Nexus.
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372. How did you collect the stories?
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373. I started small.
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374. A pub lit by candles,
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375. a Catholic church confession box,
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376. a coal-powered theatre,
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377. an electric cinema, a space opera.
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378. Until I had the idea to power the vehicle
with stories itself.
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379. I worked for centuries,
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380. and all I wanted was to be recognised.
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381. They told me that I should know my place.
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382. I primed the Nexus so well
that it worked without me.
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383. So they threw me out.
Out of my life's work.
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384. All I salvaged was my Story Engine.
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385. We will have vengeance, Doctor.
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386. We have stopped moving.
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387. The engine burned too much energy holding
us together when he forced the door open.
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388. Typical Doctor. Irresponsible.
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389. I have never… Wait.
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390. That's it.
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391. Abby, the daughter of Anansi.
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392. Abena. That is your full name, isn't it?
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393. Don't you dare speak it.
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394. Oh, oh.
- You are not worthy.
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395. I grew up trapped with Anansi,
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396. terrified someone would win me in a bet.
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397. I'd heard about you
travelling through time.
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398. I had faith you would help.
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399. Instead, you left me.
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400. I'm here because of you.
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401. You humiliated me, Doctor.
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402. You look so different now.
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403. I am sorry
that I couldn't take you with me.
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404. I was a fugitive back then.
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405. Anansi was wrong to offer that bet.
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406. And, frankly, darling,
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407. I was busy in a different story
that might be finished one day.
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408. You actually took that bet?
- I tried to lose.
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409. Sit, Doctor. Talk now.
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410. Where are we going?
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411. - To the heart of the Nexus.
To do what?
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412. To install the shop there
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413. and make him storyteller supreme,
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414. a trustworthy and careful God.
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415. That is what he's told you?
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416. That he's gonna become everything
that he hates and despises?
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417. And you believe him?
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418. He would not lie to me.
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419. We need a story, now!
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420. I know vengeance, and I can taste his.
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421. It is bile black and bitter.
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422. You are planning something.
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423. What? What? There's nothing I can do.
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424. I'm trapped here. Tell me.
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425. Tell me!
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426. To cut them out of memory!
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427. The gods. All of them.
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428. Severing the gods from the story web,
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429. cutting them from their essence
will destroy them.
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430. Destroy?
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431. As in kill, die, dead as a doornail.
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432. Done. All the gods, gone.
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433. That would destroy your father.
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434. This is my gift to you.
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435. Abena, remember what he did to you.
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436. Betting you. His own child.
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437. Humans are tied to the gods.
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438. Destroying them would harm
the very essence of humanity.
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439. A world without stories.
How would they pass on tradition?
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440. - You knew about this plan?
- No, no.
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441. Is this what you want, Abena?
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442. We need power. Now!
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443. Doctor, you need to sit and talk.
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444. Doctor, please.
Okay, do what he says, okay?
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445. We have to get back home. Our families.
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446. - I can't help him do this.
- Please.
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447. Abena, hurt people hurt people.
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448. Your father hurt you.
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449. The difference between good and evil
is what we do with that pain.
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450. - Enough. Put him in the chair.
With pleasure.
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451. - Rashid, come.
No, no, no, no, no. Wait.
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452. - No. Rashid, please, wait!
- I promise I will get you home.
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453. Please, Doctor.
- I will get you home.
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454. You do not want to do this!
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455. - Doctor!
- Hold him down. Hold him down.
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456. We have to get back home. Okay? I'm sorry!
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457. Stop! Stop! Stop!
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458. I will talk. I will tell a story.
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459. Please, Doctor.
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460. Trust me.
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461. In a time of slavery and deep suffering,
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462. the slaves who broke their chains
and escaped
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463. would return to try to free others.
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464. Slaves were not allowed to carry paper.
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465. They were always stopped and searched.
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466. But the women were very clever.
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467. They could make their hair
into many shapes and patterns,
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468. and in one style,
hair could be braided to the scalp,
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469. bending and curling like roads or paths.
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470. So the women would weave maps
into their hair and pass it on.
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471. Mothers to daughters.
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472. Slave to slave.
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473. Plantation to plantation.
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474. And the slave masters
never checked their hair,
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475. so they shared routes like this
and escaped to freedom.
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476. Mm-hmm. Exactly.
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477. There. All done.
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478. And battery levels are good.
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479. For now.
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480. You look good.
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481. Oh.
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482. So good I could kiss myself.
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483. It's a shame I might have to ruin it.
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484. Why?
You'll find out soon enough.
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485. Belinda, now.
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486. Took you long enough.
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487. Oi! Just trying to concentrate.
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488. Abena gave me the map to freedom.
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489. This way. Come on.
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490. Stop. Stop, stop, stop, stop.
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491. This way. Run.
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492. You did this?
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493. I'm revoking your access.
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494. - No!
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495. You lied to me for all these years.
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496. I will handle the others.
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497. The map leads to here.
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498. The Story Engine.
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499. A beating heart inside a brain?
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500. Brilliant. What else is a story?
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501. What else could hold all stories?
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502. Quick. Quick. That control desk.
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503. Start ripping out all of the wires, yeah?
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504. I need to disrupt the flow of power.
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505. Get away from my heart.
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506. You have done nothing. Nothing!
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507. We are still on track,
and then I will cut them off.
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508. All the gods!
They will shrivel up and die!
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509. You did all this to kill them?
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510. Of course. They deserve it.
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511. Rubbish! This is your ego.
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512. - Wanna hear a story?
- No,
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513. - don't give him any more power.
- Really short! Really short.
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514. You know Hemingway?
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515. I saw some of his books back there.
I met him.
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516. I wanted to see how good he was,
so I challenged him.
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517. "Hemmy, baby,
write me the shortest story you can."
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518. He wrote it in six words.
Short as hell. Do you wanna hear mine?
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519. I'm born.
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520. I die.
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521. I am born!
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522. You are giving me power? But how, huh?
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523. I am not connected to you!
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524. No. The engine is connected to me,
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525. my stories, my voice.
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526. Look. On!
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527. …universe can do what we're doing.
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528. Just this once!
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529. I'm the Doctor. I'm a Time Lord.
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530. When you fire that first shot,
no matter how right you feel,
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531. you have no idea who's going to die.
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532. When people need help, I never refuse.
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533. My body is like a barbershop.
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534. All of them inside,
telling their stories, bickering.
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535. I will not fail them.
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536. You told a never-ending story?
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537. And gave me never-ending power?
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538. He's taken out a third of the engine.
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539. You can't process that power.
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540. Your engine could overload and explode!
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541. We'll all be sucked into space!
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542. You will not do that?
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543. You will not!
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544. No! No!
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545. Would you?
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546. Eh?
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547. The stories say you protect life—
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548. That is what I am doing.
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549. You destroy the gods,
you wreck seven billion lives!
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550. - Seven billion, or us!
No. No!
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551. I control the engine,
you control the doors.
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552. Let them out.
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553. You were once mortal.
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554. Their lives and their stories will end
because of you.
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555. Do you want that?
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556. Do you?
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557. The shop is compressing.
The corridor is now a straight line.
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558. Go. You go.
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559. I will be right behind you. Yeah?
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560. Belinda, I will be right behind you.
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561. - Okay? Okay?
- Okay.
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562. I'll wait for you!
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563. Go!
Go!
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564. What are you doing?
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565. Listen to me.
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566. What would your six-word story be?
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567. What would the essence of your life be?
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568. I want you to live long enough
to write it.
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569. Don't let this be how your story ends.
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570. - Doctor! Doctor!
- Go back! Go back!
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571. No! Where is he?
He'll make it. He'll make it.
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572. There they are!
- Come, come, come quick! Come!
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573. Doctor! Doctor!
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574. Okay. All right.
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575. Thank you for keeping
your promise, Doctor.
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576. Abby, he rescued us, but you…
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577. you kept us alive.
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578. Rise.
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579. And, little brother, run, like the wind.
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580. - Go, go, go.
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581. Run. Greet your families for me.
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582. I'll win all the races!
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583. I'm going to find
my wife and child! And my mother!
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584. All I wanted was
to be credited for my work.
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585. I've spent my entire existence
serving the gods.
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586. What will I do now?
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587. What you do best. Keep collecting stories.
Copy !req
588. Start your own barbershop.
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589. No need. I'm retiring.
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590. I shouldn't have…
I thought you could handle anything.
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591. I can because you look after me too.
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592. But you are part of my community.
I should have protected you. Eh?
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593. I'm sorry.
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594. I'm sorry too.
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595. Hmm.
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596. Yeah.
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597. Take care.
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598. Let all this settle and continue.
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599. Me? I don't belong here.
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600. I don't even have a name
for people to trust.
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601. Try "Adétòkundbo."
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602. My father's name.
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603. Thank you.
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604. I don't deserve this kindness.
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605. So what will you do now?
Copy !req
606. Anything I want.
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607. I understand if you hate him.
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608. I won't have that in my heart.
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609. What did you say?
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610. "Hurt people hurt people."
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611. Hmm! Imagine. A mortal teaching
a god life lessons?
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612. Thank you, Doctor.
Copy !req
613. I will be back for a haircut
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614. and for that six-word story.
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615. Good luck.
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616. Did you see a child?
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617. A child?
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618. Yeah. I saw a spooky kid back there.
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619. I didn't see anything.
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620. But the stories were leaking out,
getting mixed up.
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621. Okay. Well, you have to tell me about Omo.
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622. Ah, Omo! Hmm!
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623. It's a long story, but…
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624. once upon a time…
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625. Welcome to the 803rd
Interstellar Song Contest.
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626. At arms.
I will survive. I will find you.
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627. You can still
help those people.
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628. Pop.
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629. Can't we call for rescue?
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630. Doctor!
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