1. Maybe he's just resting.Copy !req
2. - For three days?
- Oh, he's really tired lately.Copy !req
3. He's working too hard.Copy !req
4. We've all been tired lately,Copy !req
5. but you don't see me
lying around decomposing.Copy !req
6. Well, do you think he's dead?Copy !req
7. Well, if he is, the company
will soon get to the bottom of it.Copy !req
8. They don't miss a thing.Copy !req
9. You the dead guy?Copy !req
10. - No, this is the one you want.
- Hmm?Copy !req
11. Thanks. Boy, guys are dropping
dead at work all over the place.Copy !req
12. - Downright odd.
- It's appalling.Copy !req
13. You wouldn't believe
the paperwork.Copy !req
14. Thousands of death certificates
I gotta fill out.Copy !req
15. But, hey, that's life.Copy !req
16. Well, not for them. Ha!Copy !req
17. You know,
this could be a nutty idea,Copy !req
18. but maybe these guys
are dropping deadCopy !req
19. because they're working to the
point of complete exhaustion.Copy !req
20. Maybe all these dead guys
need a little time off.Copy !req
21. Huh?Copy !req
22. We already get time off.
It's called lunch.Copy !req
23. Oh, no, no, I'm thinking
longer than lunch.Copy !req
24. - A long lunch?
- No. I think it's gotta be a fairly substantialCopy !req
25. period of time.Copy !req
26. - A day? Six months.
- Longer. Shorter.Copy !req
27. - Two weeks?
- Nah... OK. Yeah, two weeks.Copy !req
28. So you're saying is that if you
all get two weeks off every yearCopy !req
29. to relax and recuperate,Copy !req
30. ultimately you'll be healthier
and do a better job,Copy !req
31. and the economic disruption that
has plagued the nation would be ended.Copy !req
32. Uh, yeah. That's it.Copy !req
33. You're right,
it is a nutty idea.Copy !req
34. - Yeah.
- Here, slip on this toe tag.Copy !req
35. It'll speed things up later.Copy !req
36. - Thanks.
- Sure.Copy !req
37. Honey, I'm home.Copy !req
38. Aaah!Copy !req
39. - Ohh!
- Ow!Copy !req
40. - Ow!
- Ooh!Copy !req
41. Ahh!Copy !req
42. I'm sitting at the table,
I'm looking for dinner.Copy !req
43. - There's no dinner.
- Here's your dinner.Copy !req
44. - About time.
- Catch you later.Copy !req
45. - Robbie, where are you going?
- I'm going out with the guys.Copy !req
46. - Don't you want some supper?
- Um... yeah.Copy !req
47. Thanks. Bye.Copy !req
48. Earl, did you see that?Copy !req
49. We never get to spend time
with Robbie anymore.Copy !req
50. Yeah, and that's one of the most
rewarding things about parenthood.Copy !req
51. Eventually they grow up
and don't want anything to do with you.Copy !req
52. Hi. Sorry I'm late.Copy !req
53. Charlene.
I didn't know you were out.Copy !req
54. Yeah, all day.Copy !req
55. Wow, dinner looks great.
Shame. Too bad I already ate.Copy !req
56. Bye. La, la.Copy !req
57. - I swear this family is falling apartCopy !req
58. We might as well just be
strangers who live in the same house.Copy !req
59. Dinner used to be the one hourCopy !req
60. when we all got together
to share the events of the day.Copy !req
61. Not true, Fran. It never took us
a whole hour to eat dinner.Copy !req
62. Well, at least you're here
to have dinner with Mommy, aren't you?Copy !req
63. - Already ate.
- You already ate?Copy !req
64. - What did you eat?
- You aren't gonna like it.Copy !req
65. - It wasn't furniture, was it?
- Maybe.Copy !req
66. - Oh!
- This is why we don't need a pet.Copy !req
67. We interrupt
your dinner to bring youCopy !req
68. this DNN special report.Copy !req
69. In a bold move to stem the tideCopy !req
70. of exhausted dead guys
in the workplace,Copy !req
71. the government announced
that starting todayCopy !req
72. all employees will be entitled
to take off from workCopy !req
73. for a period of time
to be known as... a vacation.Copy !req
74. - Hey-hey!
- All workers who feel exhaustedCopy !req
75. and put-upon by the excessive
demands of their employersCopy !req
76. may take two full weeks
to rest and recuperate.Copy !req
77. Ooh! Great.Copy !req
78. - See ya.Copy !req
79. - Goodness. Two weeks.Copy !req
80. That's a lot of time.
What are we going to do for two whole weeks?Copy !req
81. Hey there, friends.Copy !req
82. Are you wondering what to do
with your new vacation?Copy !req
83. Well, why not spend two weeksCopy !req
84. of wholesome family
togetherness communing with natureCopy !req
85. at Pap Geezer's Rustic RetreatCopy !req
86. Swamp Cabins and Condo
Timeshares.Copy !req
87. That's it! This is how we
should spend our two weeks.Copy !req
88. Darn right. Two solid weeks
of sitting in front of the TV.Copy !req
89. No! We're going to one
of those swamp cabins.Copy !req
90. In a beautiful place like that
without the distractions of daily life,Copy !req
91. like television, we can spend
some real family time together.Copy !req
92. Uh, gee, Fran,Copy !req
93. I'm not sure it's wise to be
away from TV that long.Copy !req
94. There might be another special
report and I might miss it.Copy !req
95. We're going to the swamp,
Earl...Copy !req
96. as a family.Copy !req
97. - Yeah.Copy !req
98. So, then,Copy !req
99. I suppose you've all heard
about this new vacation thing.Copy !req
100. - Oh, yes, sir.
- Yeah.Copy !req
101. Now, in the interest
of our employees,Copy !req
102. Wesayso has come up
with an exciting wayCopy !req
103. - to spend your new vacation.Copy !req
104. - Wow.
- Hey, that's great!Copy !req
105. I could spend my two weeks
just looking at that.Copy !req
106. - Maybe even three whole weeks.
- Stop talking!Copy !req
107. I'm only going to
explain this once.Copy !req
108. This is a picture of
Wesaysoland. It's a theme park.Copy !req
109. Uh, what's a theme park, sir?Copy !req
110. It's a magical place
for Wesayso employeesCopy !req
111. to spend their vacation...
and their money.Copy !req
112. Ah, there are rides and food
and family funCopy !req
113. for the young,
the young at heart,Copy !req
114. and fat worthless
tubs like you.Copy !req
115. - Great.
- Since vacations were only created yesterday, sir,Copy !req
116. I was wondering
how it is possible for youCopy !req
117. to design and construct a
world-class family resort in a single day?Copy !req
118. Why, heh, no challenge
is too greatCopy !req
119. when you attack it
with imagination, ingenuity,Copy !req
120. and a relaxed attitude
toward building codes.Copy !req
121. Oh, I hear you, sir.Copy !req
122. - Sign me up.Copy !req
123. Sinclair?Copy !req
124. Gosh, sir, it sounds great,Copy !req
125. but my wife wants our family
to spend some quality time at the swamp cabins.Copy !req
126. Well, you probably wouldn't
be interested in Wesaysoland anyway.Copy !req
127. Why, it's so enormous,Copy !req
128. it's so filled with
distractions, heh,Copy !req
129. you wouldn't even be able
to find your kids there.Copy !req
130. Oh, sir, it sounds
like a dream come true,Copy !req
131. but the missus has got her heart
set on this nightmarish swamp cabin scenario.Copy !req
132. I don't think I'll be able
to talk her out of it.Copy !req
133. That's nice, Sinclair,Copy !req
134. but, uh, as I recall
that precocious tot of yours,Copy !req
135. the baby,
can be quite persuasiveCopy !req
136. when he latches on to an idea.Copy !req
137. Yeah, yeah.Copy !req
138. Just show him this glossy
brochure for Wesaysoland,Copy !req
139. with all the toy concessions
and candy stands circled in red.Copy !req
140. And let nature take its course.Copy !req
141. I wanna go to Wesaysoland!
I wanna go to Wesaysoland!Copy !req
142. - I wanna go to Wesaysoland!
- Sweetheart, sweetheart.Copy !req
143. Can I just say something?Copy !req
144. We will go to Wesaysoland...
next year.Copy !req
145. - But this year...
- I wanna go to Wesaysoland!Copy !req
146. - Wesaysoland, Wesaysoland!
- I know what you're doing.Copy !req
147. You can scream all you want,Copy !req
148. it's not going to change things
one bit.Copy !req
149. Wesaysoland, Wesaysoland!Copy !req
150. Wesaysoland, Wesaysoland,
Wesaysoland!Copy !req
151. There! There it is! Do you see?Copy !req
152. It's right there,
your precious Wesaysoland.Copy !req
153. You got what you want.
Are you happy now?Copy !req
154. Are you happy now?Copy !req
155. Thank you, Mama.Copy !req
156. - All's well that ends well.
- Yeah.Copy !req
157. I know where he got that
brochure.Copy !req
158. I know you were behind this all
along. I'm here under protest.Copy !req
159. How can I get this family
togetherCopy !req
160. with you working against me
at every step?Copy !req
161. Fran, has it ever occurred to
you this family doesn't want to come together?Copy !req
162. We're happy not knowing about
our personal joys and disappointments.Copy !req
163. I'm not going to
give up so easily.Copy !req
164. If this is where
we're going to be,Copy !req
165. then we'll conduct ourselves
as a functional family.Copy !req
166. Uh-huh, OK.Copy !req
167. Uh, kids, if we get separated
find your own way home.Copy !req
168. Moo! Hi there, boys and girls,
moms and dads.Copy !req
169. I'm Moolah the Cash CowCopy !req
170. and I'm "udderly" delighted
to see ya.Copy !req
171. Hey, hey! Calm down, Junior.Copy !req
172. It's only Moolah the Cash Cow,Copy !req
173. Wesaysoland's whimsical and
highly-copyrighted park mascot.Copy !req
174. No, no! Get him away from me!Copy !req
175. Step right up to the ticket
booth, Dad, and pay for admission,Copy !req
176. so we can start the family fun!Copy !req
177. Hi, we're here on the deluxe
two-week employee vacation package.Copy !req
178. So, you're entitled to the one
percent company discount.Copy !req
179. Oh, so, um,
how much do I owe you?Copy !req
180. Whoa, slow down, friend.Copy !req
181. First you have to
trade in your cashCopy !req
182. for colorful playful Moo Money,Copy !req
183. which can be used
anywhere within the park...Copy !req
184. except to buy food,
merchandise, or emergency medical treatment.Copy !req
185. - Boy, the fun begins early.
- All righty.Copy !req
186. Here are your tickets.Copy !req
187. You owe us 2,000 Moo Dollars.Copy !req
188. Earl, isn't that
an awful lot of money?Copy !req
189. - Fran, hello.
It isn't real money. - See?Copy !req
190. - Huh?
- Oh, yeah.Copy !req
191. Come on in, everybody.
Right this way.Copy !req
192. Take a look.Copy !req
193. Wow. It's magical.Copy !req
194. - Dad, that's a poster.
- Where's the park?Copy !req
195. There.Copy !req
196. There. Just look at it, kids.Copy !req
197. A vast world of enchantment.Copy !req
198. Well, I hear it really
comes alive at night.Copy !req
199. - I wanna go to Swamp Cabin!Copy !req
200. Swamp Cabin! Swamp Cabin!
Swamp Cabin! Swamp Cabin!Copy !req
201. This is it, folks.Copy !req
202. The happiest room on Earth.Copy !req
203. Jeez, they're really milking
this cow motif, don't you think?Copy !req
204. Yeah. Isn't this kind of small
for all of us?Copy !req
205. Oh, no. It only seems smallCopy !req
206. because they've packed it
with wonderful conveniences.Copy !req
207. Hey! Look at this
cute little fridge.Copy !req
208. You have just spent
five dollars.Copy !req
209. Six dollars.
Seven dollars. Eight...Copy !req
210. Nobody touches the fridge.Copy !req
211. Apparently this is
the adventure suite.Copy !req
212. "An adventure in sleeping."Copy !req
213. I wonder what that adventure is.Copy !req
214. - Hmm.Copy !req
215. That might start to get old
after a while.Copy !req
216. - Hey, this is a pay phone.
- You have now spent 20 cents.Copy !req
217. Forty cents, 50 cents...Copy !req
218. - Hey! Put that down!
- What?Copy !req
219. No one touches the phone.Copy !req
220. Earl, this is a pay toilet, too.Copy !req
221. They're charging us
for everything.Copy !req
222. Ah, not the one thing
that matters.Copy !req
223. Quiet, everybody.Copy !req
224. With my cute little bovine
remote control,Copy !req
225. my vacation begins now.Copy !req
226. Howdy!
And welcome to Wesaysoland,Copy !req
227. where everybody has a good timeCopy !req
228. because we say so.Copy !req
229. You're tuned to Wesaysoland TV,Copy !req
230. a whole universe of special
channels available only within the park.Copy !req
231. This is channel one.Copy !req
232. You're tuned to channel two,
where we urge you to purchaseCopy !req
233. the following fine Wesaysoland
memorabilia.Copy !req
234. Now who could forget their trip
to WesaysolandCopy !req
235. when they bring home
a T-shirt that reads...Copy !req
236. "I can't forget my trip to
Wesaysoland."Copy !req
237. - Uh, Wesayso channel threeCopy !req
238. is proud to offer guests
a guide to hotel amenities.Copy !req
239. Now please note that shower
caps, soap, room keys and bed sheets are available,Copy !req
240. - for a nominal charge.
- Huh?Copy !req
241. - Uh... Make up your mind!Copy !req
242. Um, maybe we should
leave the TV off.Copy !req
243. That's right. We didn't
come here to watch TV.Copy !req
244. We came here to be together.Copy !req
245. Sure we did.Copy !req
246. So let's get out into that
magical wonderland of funCopy !req
247. and have a rollicking good time.Copy !req
248. And if by chance we happen
to get separated from each other,Copy !req
249. so much the better.Copy !req
250. Is that cow still out there?Copy !req
251. Sweetheart,
it's nothing to be scared of.Copy !req
252. It's a dinosaur
in a cow costume.Copy !req
253. Hmm.Copy !req
254. Now, you two run along.Copy !req
255. Keep an eye on the time
and meet right back at this spot in, uh...Copy !req
256. - ... two weeks.
- All right. Great.Copy !req
257. Isn't there some enjoyable ride
we can all go on together as a family?Copy !req
258. Yeah, I think that's
the rocket sled to tedium.Copy !req
259. - Yeah.
- See you, Mom.Copy !req
260. - See you, kids.
- Bye.Copy !req
261. - Hey! Hey, there's Roy.
- Huh?Copy !req
262. - Hi, Roy!
- Hi, Roy!Copy !req
263. - Hi, guy.
- Oh, hi!Copy !req
264. - Hey, when did you get here?
- Uh, yesterday.Copy !req
265. Hey, let me tell you, this place
is a roller coaster of family fun.Copy !req
266. Yeah? What have you done so far?Copy !req
267. - Stood in this line.
- Huh?Copy !req
268. - Roy, you mind if we tag along?
- Oh, be my guest.Copy !req
269. - Great, great.
- What's this a line for, Roy?Copy !req
270. Um, the... Well, I'm not sure,
but it's obviously something good.Copy !req
271. Do you see how long the wait is?Copy !req
272. Don't you think we should go see
what the line's for?Copy !req
273. I'm not doing anything
that'll cost me my place.Copy !req
274. - Yeah.
- Yeah.Copy !req
275. Oh, hey, look, more TV.Copy !req
276. - Howdy!Copy !req
277. I'm here to tell you more
about the wonderfulCopy !req
278. Wesaysoland attraction.Copy !req
279. Now, be sure to visit
the land of the future,Copy !req
280. coming in only ten years.Copy !req
281. Yes, we're still
building the dream.Copy !req
282. For as long as dinosaurs
have imagination,Copy !req
283. and children have
discretionary income,Copy !req
284. Wesaysoland will never
be truly finished.Copy !req
285. - Yeah.
- Oh.Copy !req
286. Uh... excuse me.Copy !req
287. Isn't this thing supposed
to sort of turn around?Copy !req
288. Yes, yes. Yeah, OK.Copy !req
289. You're not pregnant, are you?Copy !req
290. OK, here we go.Copy !req
291. - Wow.
- Keep your hands inside at all times.Copy !req
292. Are you dizzy yet?Copy !req
293. Earl, I just overheard
someone sayCopy !req
294. this is the line for stroller
rentals.Copy !req
295. Wow! They must be some
strollers.Copy !req
296. Look how long the line is.Copy !req
297. We already have a stroller.Copy !req
298. I'm starving, and I want a hat
like Uncle Roy.Copy !req
299. And I've got a hungry baby.Copy !req
300. - I'm going to find some food.
- Yeah.Copy !req
301. OK, but don't expect me
to keep your spot.Copy !req
302. - Yeah. No cutsies.Copy !req
303. Stupid.Copy !req
304. - Hi, baby.Copy !req
305. Ice On A Stick? That's all
you've got?Copy !req
306. Yeah. I just sold the last bag
of cold air.Copy !req
307. - Gimme!
- Oh, all right, fine. We'll take one.Copy !req
308. - All right. Uh-oh.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.Copy !req
309. Looks like the ice has gotten
a little warm.Copy !req
310. So what you've actually got
is...Copy !req
311. - Wet sticks.
- I'll take it!Copy !req
312. OK. And here you go.Copy !req
313. That'll be six dollars.Copy !req
314. Huh? What?Copy !req
315. And none of that crummy
Moo Money.Copy !req
316. Another one.Copy !req
317. If you're sure you're ready for
Mr. Amphibian's, uh, rocket thing,Copy !req
318. please step into the space
capsule command module-whatever.Copy !req
319. - OK.
- OK.Copy !req
320. Keep your hands and legs
inside at all times.Copy !req
321. - Ooh, wow.
- Yeah. There we go.Copy !req
322. Get ready for some
white-knuckle excitement.Copy !req
323. Three, two, one.Copy !req
324. Blast off.Copy !req
325. Ow.Copy !req
326. Vroom, vroom, vroom!Copy !req
327. Hey, Dad, what's with the
stroller?Copy !req
328. I waited in line nine hours for
this and darn it I'm going to enjoy it.Copy !req
329. Well, I'm hungry and tiredCopy !req
330. and I think we'd all rather just
go home.Copy !req
331. Let me tell you something,
Miss Crankypants.Copy !req
332. You've been down on this place
since the minute we got here.Copy !req
333. Why don't you think about the
kids?Copy !req
334. They're having a great time,
right, kids?Copy !req
335. Boring.Copy !req
336. - Hate it.
- Bites.Copy !req
337. What? You've only
been here a day.Copy !req
338. Give the place a chance.Copy !req
339. There's tons of exhilarating
fun-filled family fare.Copy !req
340. - Such as?
- Well, for instance...Copy !req
341. - Hey.
- ... did you take in, uh,Copy !req
342. Moolah's Cow Milking
Squirtacular?Copy !req
343. Look closer, Dad.
It's still under construction.Copy !req
344. - Yeah.
- OK, then.Copy !req
345. How about Pirates
of the Dairy Belt?Copy !req
346. It's not under construction.Copy !req
347. Closed for repairs.Copy !req
348. Well, how about, uh...Copy !req
349. Fantastic Journey
Through The Four Stomachs?Copy !req
350. The, uh... The... The, uh,
Haunted Slaughterhouse?Copy !req
351. - Salt Lick Mountain?
- Hello, Dad! They don't exist.Copy !req
352. Oh. OK, so it's not everything
the brochure promised,Copy !req
353. but let's look on the plus side.Copy !req
354. We're out here in the fresh air,Copy !req
355. I've got a wad of Moo Money
big enough to choke a cow,Copy !req
356. and if our stroller breaks down
we got this handy new backup.Copy !req
357. It's time to go.Copy !req
358. And I agree.Copy !req
359. Well, hello again.Copy !req
360. - Excuse me,
sir. - Mm-hmm?Copy !req
361. Although we've enjoyed our time
at your park tremendouslyCopy !req
362. and will include Wesaysoland
in future vacation plans,Copy !req
363. we'd like to leave before
we lose our minds.Copy !req
364. I see. Just pay for the rest
of your 14-day packageCopy !req
365. and we'll have you on your way.Copy !req
366. But we've only
been here one day.Copy !req
367. - It's a package.
- Huh?Copy !req
368. You don't get it, do you?Copy !req
369. Perhaps if it came
from the felt-covered mouthCopy !req
370. of our charming,
legally unassailable mascot.Copy !req
371. Hi, folks!Copy !req
372. - What's your beef?
- We want to go home.Copy !req
373. - Yeah.
- Yeah.Copy !req
374. Look, wise guy,
you booked a 14-day package.Copy !req
375. You gotta stay in the park
and spend money for 14 days, capiche?Copy !req
376. - And that's no bull.Copy !req
377. Oh, yeah? You gonna stop us?Copy !req
378. Call security.
Oh, don't hurt Moolah.Copy !req
379. He's just a teenager
who needs a summer job.Copy !req
380. Come on, everybody, let's go.Copy !req
381. - Right.Copy !req
382. Hey, hey, hey! Wait, wait!Copy !req
383. - Jeez!
- The gate is now electrified.Copy !req
384. Stand back from the gate.Copy !req
385. Wow. And there's no line.Copy !req
386. This is not a ride.
This is not a ride.Copy !req
387. D'oh!Copy !req
388. Two... three...Copy !req
389. There's no way we can last
another 13 more days!Copy !req
390. I want another wet stick!Copy !req
391. Oh, what could I
have been thinking of?Copy !req
392. I should have known
a big amusement parkCopy !req
393. with rides and attractions would
have been the worst place for a family.Copy !req
394. Oh, Fran, you were right again.Copy !req
395. Don't worry, honey,
I've got a plan.Copy !req
396. A daring escape
under the cover of darkness?Copy !req
397. I can tie a bunch
of bedsheets together.Copy !req
398. We could build
a big hang glider.Copy !req
399. I'm tunneling out.
Who's with me?Copy !req
400. We're not going to escape.
This is a highly-organized theme park.Copy !req
401. I'm sure they've anticipated
any escape plan we could possibly come up with.Copy !req
402. - No.Copy !req
403. We'll stay in this room
for the next 13 daysCopy !req
404. and bond, just like we would
have at the swamp.Copy !req
405. Aw, gee, Fran, I wouldn't
exactly call that a plan.Copy !req
406. I'd call it hell on Earth.Copy !req
407. The first thing we've got
to change is that attitude.Copy !req
408. If we all believe we can
have fun as a family, we will.Copy !req
409. Mom, were you ever
a cruise director?Copy !req
410. I'm sure we can think up
some activities we can all do together.Copy !req
411. We can tell jokes and stories,
we can use a flashlightCopy !req
412. and make caveman shapes
on the wall.Copy !req
413. I'm gonna throw myself
on the electric fence.Copy !req
414. - I'm right behind you.
- I think we should start with a game.Copy !req
415. I want everyone to look around.Copy !req
416. I'm sure we can find cards
or something.Copy !req
417. Uh... Oh, hey,
here's a bottle cap.Copy !req
418. I've got a piece of string.Copy !req
419. - I found a furry apple core.
- And I've got a stroller.Copy !req
420. Fine. I know a great game that
takes just exactly those things.Copy !req
421. - Go, go, go, go... Yeah!Copy !req
422. - Yeah, yeah, yeah!
- Go! Come on, come on.Copy !req
423. Me, me, me, me!Copy !req
424. - Oh, it's you!
- Oh, Mom.Copy !req
425. - Yeah.
- Do the horse, Fran.Copy !req
426. - Do it, Mom.
- Do the horsey.Copy !req
427. - All right, I'll do the horse.
- Yay!Copy !req
428. - What a filly.Copy !req
429. Wow! What a great vacation!Copy !req
430. Sing-alongs,
hotel room scavenger hunts,Copy !req
431. late night heart to heart chats.Copy !req
432. I feel completely relaxed,Copy !req
433. and ready to go back to work
with renewed energy and dedication.Copy !req
434. - Yeah.
- Yeah. You know,Copy !req
435. I never knew I could have such
a good time with my own family.Copy !req
436. I knew we could rally together
and function as a family.Copy !req
437. All it took was a complete
lack of other alternatives.Copy !req
438. I like vacation.Copy !req
439. Yeah. Hey, Dad, can we come back
to Wesaysoland again next year?Copy !req
440. Well, sure, if you want to.Copy !req
441. Please deposit
three dollars for another hour of light.Copy !req
442. Has anybody got
any quarters left?Copy !req