Dinosaurs 2x15

1. Honey, I'm home.

2. After a night of terrifying eruption,

3. Mount Thunder is once again silent.

4. In the aftermath of this catastrophe,

5. over a foot of volcanic ash

6. has blanketed our area,

7. stranding thousands in their homes,

8. ravaging millions of acres of farmland

9. and causing the following schools to be closed today...

10. - Yes! Please! - Please, please!

11. Molten State University...

12. - Please! - Come on!

13. All Little Lizard and Montessaurus preschools...

14. - Say it! - Come on, La Brea! Say it.

15. Bob La Brea High School...

16. Yay!

17. Now, now, kids, hold it.

18. Just because you get a day off from school

19. is no reason to act like wild animals.

20. OK.

21. And all operations are suspended today

22. at Wesayso Development Corporation.

23. Yeehaw! Yes! A day off!

24. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

25. Why are we happy?

26. Because it's an ash day, we get to stay home from school.

27. I get to stay home from school?

28. You're a baby. You don't go to school yet.

29. I want to go to school

30. - Why? - So I can stay home.

31. - You are home. - Then I got my way.

32. Let's finish breakfast. Then I'll get the sled.

33. - I'm gonna make an ashman. - I'll knock it down.

34. And I get to watch daytime TV.

35. So it's like a whole new world's opened up.

36. Now it's time once again

37. for Ask Mister Lizard.

38. Yay!

39. Hmm. Gosh, Mr. Lizard,

40. I've never seen a real jet engine before.

41. How does it work?

42. Well, Timmy, the best way to learn about something

43. is by taking a good, close look.

44. Why don't you peek inside, there you go, OK,

45. while I step behind this asbestos shield.

46. Ooh, he's gonna say it.

47. Gosh, it's not doing anything.

48. Keep looking.

49. OK, but I don't think it's going to work.

50. Nothing's happening.

51. Say it!

52. We're gonna need another Timmy.

53. - Yay! - He said it!

54. There are a lot of things that need doing around here, Earl.

55. You're way behind on paying the bills.

56. Am not.

57. Look at this heating bill. It's stamped "pay now or die."

58. At least they're still giving us a choice.

59. Oh! Robbie, don't you have a project

60. for your science fair tomorrow?

61. Oh. Yes.

62. - And, Charlene... - Don't wanna.

63. You can help me here in the kitchen.

64. I'm gonna make a whole pot of grape jelly.

65. Hey, now, there's fun.

66. Ta-da!

67. - Mama. - Hmm?

68. What's that?

69. Well, this makes the jelly taste better.

70. The flavor goes up into this dome,

71. gets caught in these tubes...

72. Gee, Mom, that's real fascinating,

73. but how about if I go to the store and buy some jelly?

74. And we can both have a life?

75. Charlene!

76. Or not.

77. Hey, Dad, this was supposed to be a big, fun day,

78. and Mom's trying to kill it for all of us.

79. I mean, who's the boss around here, huh?

80. - Yeah. - Yeah.

81. - Fran? - What?

82. - She is. - Aw.

83. School. Love it.

84. Remember, class,

85. some of the most inspirational inventions

86. in the history of science

87. have resulted from the fortuitous combination

88. of commonplace things.

89. Oh! All right, who threw that?

90. Hmm, combinations.

91. Combinations. Let's see, um...

92. Um... sneakers.

93. Hmm, yeah.

94. Um... what else?

95. What else? A pump.

96. Yeah. Sneakers with a pump in them.

97. Hmm.

98. Let's see... Oh, what a stupid idea.

99. Let's see, what else?

100. Aw, jeez.

101. I got peanut butter on my chocolate bar.

102. Yuck! I can't eat that.

103. All right, all right. I'm never gonna come up with an idea.

104. OK, OK, combinations.

105. I have to come up with an idea.

106. Come on, Sinclair, stick with it.

107. On this unexpected holiday from school,

108. thousands of very cool guys and totally hot babes

109. spent the day frolicking in the ash,

110. having what many describe as "the most fun ever."

111. That's it. I'm going outside.

112. Stay in your room, finish that assignment

113. and have no fun for the rest of your life!

114. Isn't she terrific? My mother, ladies and gentlemen.

115. How about some applause for the guy paying these heating bills?

116. Earl, Get out of Robbie's thoughts and pay those bills!

117. Yes, dear. Sheesh.

118. All right, all right. Shh, um...

119. Yeah, what do we got...?

120. Let's see what we got here.

121. Um, yeah.

122. An erupting volcano.

123. Yeah. Uh...

124. A recycled jelly thing.

125. Yeah. Um...

126. And heating bills nobody wants to pay.

127. That's it!

128. It's a jelly volcano?

129. Look, look! The jelly represents hot, simmering lava.

130. Now watch this.

131. OK, the steam coming off it gets trapped here,

132. flows down here,

133. where it not only heats the house

134. but powers the turbine to generate electricity.

135. See? Light!

136. Always thought light was overrated, Sinclair.

137. Seems to me the important stuff happens in the dark.

138. I bet it would actually work.

139. Think about it, clean energy, lower heating bills.

140. This could be good for everybody.

141. Well, aren't we the little overachiever.

142. You really want to win this thing, don't you, scooter?

143. Yeah, but the competition looks pretty tough.

144. Did you see Billy Melman's project

145. where you clap and a lamp turns on?

146. I mean, that's genius. How am I gonna beat that?

147. Oh, yeah. Well, thing about Billy

148. is he uses substandard materials.

149. You know, the kind that tend to shatter

150. when broken over his head.

151. Yo, Billy, let me see that lamp.

152. No, no, no, Spike.

153. Spike, I wanna win this fair and square.

154. How have you managed to stay alive so long?

155. This is a diagram

156. of all the layers of our atmosphere.

157. The blue layer represents the air all around us.

158. This is clouds,

159. and, um, the pink layer is hairspray,

160. and the green layer is where sneezes go,

161. and this black stuff is space, see?

162. Hmm. What are these three little dots above the clouds?

163. Oh, uh, uh, those are my grandparents and my dog,

164. who got hit by a truck.

165. A very... touching tribute.

166. Oh, thank you.

167. No, no, the green liquid into the main chamber.

168. Oh, still, very nice.

169. Ah, Spike.

170. What project have you created for our science fair?

171. I don't do projects.

172. You have to do a project.

173. Okeydokey.

174. Oh.

175. Well, what do we have here?

176. Looky, looky.

177. I call this "what's inside a TV."

178. Uh... very nice.

179. Very realistic.

180. And, Mr. Sinclair, what have you got for us?

181. Uh, this is the Sinclair Power Dome.

182. Remarkable.

183. What you've done is utilize

184. an enormous natural power source

185. that no one has ever thought of tapping into before.

186. Oh, and it's completely clean power. No pollution.

187. Do you realize the ramifications

188. if this project were actually implemented?

189. You think it could be?

190. I don't see why not.

191. Robert, this little idea of yours

192. could be the most significant innovation of our time.

193. Sinclair, hey.

194. Yes! Yes! High five! Huh?

195. Clap on, clap off. I'm a millionaire!

196. Listen, listen.

197. "If the full-scale dome works," the chief elder said...

198. I lost it. Oh! "... we would negotiate with Sinclair

199. to secure the rights to his design."

200. "Secure the rights."

201. What a beautiful phrase.

202. - What's that mean? - It means,

203. and I never thought I'd be saying this,

204. the government would have to give us money!

205. I'm telling you, Fran,

206. it's like a dream. Somebody pinch me.

207. - Ha! - Doh!

208. I love you.

209. Hmm.

210. Oh, there's our young celebrity.

211. Look, son, here's another story about your wonderful invention.

212. Oh, yeah? What's it say?

213. Well, to paraphrase,

214. we're rich. Money, money, money, money.

215. Money, money, money, money.

216. Dad, I didn't invent this dome to get rich or famous.

217. Whoa! Whoa! Guys!

218. Oh! Oh, jeez!

219. I invented it to bring free energy to all dinosaurs

220. and improve the quality of life throughout the world.

221. Sure, and that's the true source of my pride, son.

222. I was thinking we could stack the cash in the den

223. and make a little money fort.

224. - Earl. - Yes, my heiress?

225. These are not the kind of values to teach your son.

226. Oh, that's all right, sweetheart.

227. If they're not the right values, we can always buy new ones.

228. Dad, not everything is about money.

229. Yeah, you're right, son.

230. But this is!

231. Look, it's great if we can benefit,

232. but what's exciting about this is that all of society benefits.

233. This is something that's good for everybody.

234. This is a disaster!

235. But nothing a chief executive of your enormous power

236. and authority can't handle, right, Mr. Ashland?

237. - Cut the butt-kissing, Richfield. - Yes, sir.

238. - Know what I do with a butt-kisser? - No, sir.

239. We got a problem, Richfield. This.

240. The Sinclair Dome, sir?

241. For years, the Wesayso Energy Division

242. has been extremely profitable,

243. obscenely profitable.

244. Our annual report is positively scandalous.

245. But that happy, carefree time is threatened.

246. By a boy's science project?

247. Free power puts us right out of the energy business.

248. Or should I say, Robert Sinclair has the potential

249. of putting us out of business,

250. unless, of course, we put him out of business first.

251. - Ah-ha! - That's where you come in.

252. You want me to eat him, sir?

253. Don't be ridiculous.

254. We're executives in a large, respected corporation.

255. We don't eat our enemies.

256. We have lawyers for that.

257. Someone call a lawyer?

258. - Not now, Elliot. - OK.

259. Well, what do you want?

260. Information.

261. I want to know everything there is to know

262. about young Mr. Sinclair.

263. Ah, you want me to spy on him.

264. Please! Governments spy.

265. Corporations study.

266. I want you to do an independent study

267. of young Master Sinclair.

268. And what will my independent study conclude, sir?

269. That his dome is a crackpot idea that'll never work.

270. With all due respect, sir,

271. the dome appears to be elegant in its simplicity

272. and will probably work forever

273. without requiring a service department

274. or an extended warranty.

275. That's because he has no corporation behind him.

276. Ah.

277. What we've got to do is discredit the boy.

278. We've got to make all dinosaurs see

279. that he is not a miracle worker,

280. that he really is a crackpot,

281. a perverse, twisted lunatic out to destroy everyone!

282. Mr. Ashland, you're asking me to destroy an innocent boy

283. just to protect our corporate assets.

284. Mmm.

285. I'm honored.

286. It's all there in front of you, Richfield.

287. Oh, yeah.

288. Ahh. Ahh.

289. And if you do your job right,

290. our young friend is going to wish he'd been eaten.

291. For years, your friends at Wesayso

292. have provided energy by burning safe, reliable sources:

293. Coal, wood, old tires.

294. But now there's a high school student

295. living here in Pangaea who would have you believe

296. you can get energy from a mountain.

297. Do you see energy coming out of that mountain?

298. I sure don't.

299. Or is it coming out of the tires where it belongs?

300. Wesayso has taken care of you and your family

301. for over 30 million years.

302. Are you going to listen to somebody else now?

303. Isn't that kind of ungrateful?

304. Wesayso.

305. We really don't like having our feelings hurt.

306. - Oh, what a load of... - What?

307. - Never mind. - Oh.

308. Excuse me, ma'am. Have you heard about the Sinclair Dome?

309. Oh, yes, I have, and I think it sounds fabulous.

310. Did you know it was invented

311. by a 15-year-old high school student?

312. Well, no, I didn't.

313. Did you know that boy failed his science class last year?

314. Really?

315. We also hear he doesn't always shower

316. - after gym class. - Eww!

317. What?

318. And did you realize

319. this same boy has not denied

320. favoring prison furloughs for convicted murderers?

321. Oh, my!

322. Let me ask you, when it comes to energy for your family,

323. who would you rather depend on,

324. a reliable old friend like Wesayso

325. or a smelly dropout who'd let killers go free?

326. Well, Wesayso.

327. That's just common sense.

328. Wesayso. We always shower after gym class.

329. Uh! Yes, like the public is that easily manipulated.

330. Ow! Ow! Hey! Hey!

331. Hey, suck tar!

332. Robbie, what happened?

333. I'll tell you what happened.

334. I invented something that can make everyone's lives better,

335. and they're trying to kill me.

336. That doesn't matter, sweetheart.

337. You know your family will always stand behind you,

338. no matter what.

339. I want you out of this house right now!

340. Good call, Mom.

341. You are trying to undermine

342. the very fabric of our society!

343. Gee, Dad, I thought you loved the dome!

344. You said it was gonna make us rich.

345. Now it's gonna make us need plastic surgery

346. - and a relocation program. - You can't possibly believe that.

347. Not the baby!

348. - Huh? - Jeez.

349. The Wesayso Company has been like a loving,

350. if somewhat sadistic, parent all these many years.

351. And how have you repaid them?

352. By creating free energy and ending pollution.

353. You put a knife right in their heart.

354. Earl!

355. It's obviously true. I saw it on TV.

356. Those Wesayso ads are lies.

357. It doesn't matter.

358. It's temporarily accepted by the masses, so it's the truth.

359. Dad, you're not being rational.

360. Oh, sure.

361. And I suppose the crazed mob

362. on the front lawn isn't rational either.

363. Aw, jeez.

364. Oh, this can't be good.

365. Oh!

366. Hello?

367. - Sinclair! - Aah!

368. Mr. Richfield. Uh... I'm sorry.

369. Stop apologizing! You didn't do anything.

370. I'm sorry if my apology offended you.

371. Stop being so obsequious.

372. That was never my intent, Your Majesty.

373. Never mind!

374. You know, Sinclair,

375. I've been thinking about these ads the company's been running,

376. and I worry that maybe they've strained our friendship.

377. We have a friendship?

378. - I'm speaking! - Ahh!

379. So, what do you say I take you and the family

380. out to dinner tonight?

381. Dinner? You? Us? Eating?

382. Uh, save the sparkling repartee for the dinner, Sinclair.

383. And remember, the whole family!

384. Yes. Yes, Your Majesty.

385. Well, it's all set.

386. Good. Then let us take a moment

387. to revel in our evilness.

388. Huh?

389. Oh.

390. Mmm, that's fine for me,

391. but give the rest of them the cheap stuff.

392. Of course.

393. - Bonsoir. - Bonsoir.

394. Ohh! Boy.

395. Escargot.

396. Yeah.

397. - Hey, Rob. - Huh?

398. If Mr. Richfield is big enough

399. to extend the hand of friendship and reconciliation,

400. then the least we can do is shake that hand

401. so he won't kill us.

402. I haven't done anything wrong.

403. And he's forgiven you. Now let's go suck up.

404. Well, if it isn't the Sinclairs.

405. What a delightful-looking family you have, Earl.

406. Whoa, let me introduce them.

407. Not interested! Sit down!

408. - Down. - Jeez.

409. My, my. So good to have you here.

410. Blah, blah, blah, blah,

411. blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

412. Well, enough small talk. How about a toast?

413. To friendship.

414. To friendship

415. - Friendship. - Clink glasses!

416. - Uh, clink glasses. - Cheers.

417. Clink me. Hey, someone clink me.

418. Ow! Ah!

419. So this is how it all ends.

420. Shall I expose my underbelly, sir?

421. Hey, now. Now don't be silly.

422. How could I be mad at such an April-fresh bundle

423. of snugly goodness?

424. Goochie, goochie, goo. Hey!

425. Waiter! Two pieces of bread!

426. I'm gonna make a sandwich.

427. Ohh.

428. Excuse me, Mr. Richfield, but you won't get anywhere

429. with this inviting us out to dinner routine.

430. We can all see right through you.

431. Sir, he's lying. I can't. I promise.

432. Ix-nay on the onesty-hay, son.

433. No, no, it's quite all right, Earl.

434. I admire the boy's honesty.

435. Can I be honest with you?

436. The elders aren't interested in your dome anymore, son.

437. - Huh. - Hmm?

438. It seems to have become unpopular with the public.

439. Don't ask me why.

440. But being a corporation

441. that has always encouraged the innovative spirit,

442. we'd like to buy your dome.

443. Yeah, so it can never be built.

444. I'm prepared to offer you $500.

445. Have I given myself away?

446. I don't want your money.

447. I do! Please?

448. Smart girl. You must be very proud of your daughter.

449. Oh, yes, sir. My daughter. Very proud. All mine.

450. My son, who knows? I was in Babylon.

451. I don't care what anybody says. I'm not selling the dome.

452. Robbie, what are you doing?

453. Come on, boy. Let's do business. A thousand.

454. And that's my final offer.

455. - No sale. - Quiet.

456. - Five thousand! - Keep talking.

457. I won't sell it to you, Mr. Richfield.

458. I'd rather give it to the elders for free

459. than sell to you for a million dollars.

460. This is just a tactic, right?

461. No, Dad. I mean it.

462. Ohh! Gotcha.

463. Earl, Robbie isn't playing a game.

464. He really doesn't want to sell to Mr. Richfield.

465. And I'm proud of him.

466. Oh, yeah, me too. Proud, proud, proud.

467. Dad, there's no strategy here.

468. Robbie's selling us down the river

469. over some morality thing.

470. Oh, sure, he is. Right down the river.

471. Daddy.

472. Hmm?

473. Ow!

474. Wise up!

475. Dad, if I sell out to Mr. Richfield,

476. I'm no better than he is.

477. No better than me? You little snot-nosed twerp! I oughta...

478. Mr. Richfield,

479. I think maybe you shouldn't talk to my son like that.

480. You think? You don't think.

481. You're a tree pusher, and you work for me!

482. Or have you forgotten who you're talking to?

483. - Yes, sir, I have. - Yes!

484. And until I remember, I wanna say

485. I don't care if you have enough money

486. to buy the dome and the whole volcano. We're not...

487. Wait a second! What did you say?

488. I don't care if you have enough money to buy buy the dome.

489. No. The other part.

490. Buy the volcano?

491. That's it. Bye.

492. Oh!

493. - Oh. - Huh.

494. Check, please.

495. Turning to business news,

496. the Wesayso Corporation announced this morning

497. that it has secured the rights to all land

498. around and under Mount Thunder.

499. Aw.

500. When asked by DNN

501. if the new owners would still allow Mount Thunder

502. to be capped by the free energy dome,

503. a Wesayso spokesman said the volcano would be available

504. as soon as a series of safety tests have been concluded,

505. approximately 100 million years from now.

506. Oh!

507. So everything I did was for nothing.

508. The whole thing was a complete waste of time.

509. No, not really, son.

510. Because I learned a little something last night.

511. For 20 years, I always thought the company

512. was out to make my life miserable.

513. Now I know that's not true.

514. They want to make everyone's life miserable.

515. I don't think I would have known that without you.

516. Well, always glad to help, Dad.

517. This portion of the news has been brought to you by Wesayso.

518. Wesayso. We know what you want.

519. We know what you need.

520. We know where you live.