Dexter's Laboratory 2x12

Directed by Genndy Tartakovsky • Robert Alvarez

Dee Dee Locks and the Ness Monster—Dexter's mother forces Dexter to read to Dee Dee when she's sick, but she makes up her own story after being bored by Dexter's story (which was actually a science article). The story is completely mixed up and makes no sense. Dexter ends up catching Dee Dee's illness.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group and U.S. department of education

2. Oh! Why, yes, I do have a big test today.

3. And, of course, as every test-taker knows,

4. there's one thing you cannot do without.

5. Why, it's no secret.

6. A pencil.

7. Anumber

8. why, this baby has done me right all year.

9. I would not be caught dead in a test without this!

10. Force field, force field.

11. Force field, force field.

12. Hello, Douglas.

13. I saved your usual seat in the forward quadrant, old buddy.

14. Thanks, old buddy.

15. So, mordecai, are you fully prepared

16. for the trigonaculus test today?

17. If by that you mean, did I bringold lucky, then maybe

18. this your question.

19. Beautiful!

20. Look at the size of it!

21. It must have seen a hundred tests!

22. It's vintage 1990.

23. Good year!

24. Nice hat, geek.

25. Har har! Sticks and stones—

26. look, Gwen. Dexter has a purse.

27. It is a manly backpack.

28. And you can tell by the official NASA patch.

29. Eh, I think I'll keep it anyhow.

30. Go ahead. I have memorized every paragraph of info in those books

31. in prep for the trig test.

32. Hey, Becky.

33. Don't you that test today, too?

34. Why, yes, I believe I do.

35. Well, then,

36. you'll need a...

37. Number 2 pencil!

38. Return that instrument!

39. It belongs to me.

40. Oh, yeah? Then come and get it, shrimp.

41. Gladly.

42. Becky, catch.

43. Oops!

44. Jump! Jump! Jump!

45. You go, Dexter!

46. You can get it! Jump!

47. Careful of the instrument!

48. Oh, no! The back of the bus!

49. Just let it go, Dexter. Maybe you can use a pen.

50. No, don't do it!

51. Don't do it, Dexter. It's not worth it.

52. It's too close to the darkness.

53. This is ridiculous.

54. I am not scared of some old superstition.

55. I am a man of science. This is bogus.

56. Boy, German accent: Oh, no,

57. it's true.

58. I'll tell you just what happened.

59. Little Billy blumberg was just horsing about

60. and eating cookies. Mmm...

61. Then bus hit a bump,

62. and Billy spill his hot cocoa.

63. Mmm...

64. Driver panic

65. and almost hit ice cream truck.

66. Mmm...

67. Angry driver send Billy

68. to back of bus.

69. And Billy, his screams

70. melt with sound of hungry monster.

71. Nuh-uh, that's not what happened.

72. My mom knew Billy,

73. and I know what really happened.

74. Girl, voice- Little Billy was a mean kid.

75. Once he saw a cute spider,

76. and he smushed it.

77. With the spider's last breath, he called for help.

78. Thousands of tiny spiders came from nowhere

79. and wrapped him in a web

80. and dragged him off to the back of the bus

81. to lay him before the giant spider queen.

82. Hey.

83. This fabrication is totally unsubstantiated.

84. I'll fill you in on the real incident.

85. There he was, in the back of the bus,

86. minding his own business,

87. when an inter-dimensional time lord opened a hole

88. in the space-time continuum.

89. Hi.

90. Little Billy held onto his seat as long as he could,

91. but a bipolar tachyon vortex sucked him into a time egg.

92. Oh, please!

93. This is all superstition.

94. None of this is proven.

95. A simple scientific investigation will solve this.

96. What's the matter, pipsqueak? You scared?

97. This is ridiculous.

98. I'm going in!

99. Dexter's log.

100. Various school supplies seemed to be cocooned

101. in this strange, sticky pink goo.

102. Aah!

103. Aah!

104. Here. You dropped this.

105. Hey there, youngster. Name's bill.

106. You are little Billy blumberg?

107. Well, that's right, little chap.

108. Of course, no one calls me "little" no more.

109. Wha-what are you doing back here?

110. Ho ho! Heck, that happened way back when I was about your age.

111. Oh, I just fell asleep

112. with my chewing gum in my mouth. It fell out, stuck my hair to the chair.

113. I struggled to get free,

114. and my shoe flew off, and it broke the light.

115. Of course, the more I struggled, the more I got stuck.

116. And I've been here for 30 years.

117. Huh?

118. And how have you been surviving all these years?

119. Well, I guess I was pretty lucky that my shoe flew off

120. 'cause then my toenails could grow out,

121. and then when scraps of food would roll to the back,

122. I could rake 'em in.

123. I'll tell you,

124. you kids eat the worst junk.

125. Mmm. Chocolate.

126. So, did you come to rescue me, big guy?

127. Uh, yeah. I suppose I could cut you free.

128. With my laser pen.

129. Oh, yeah.

130. Feels good.

131. Oh, I don't know how I could ever repay you.

132. Kids,

133. I'd like you to meet little Billy.

134. Hey, kiddos!

135. Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

136. And Billy, I'd like you to meet Becky and Gwen.

137. Hi. Hi.

138. Pleased to meet ya.

139. They're the two, bill.

140. Even?

141. Even.

142. Hey! No, wait!

143. I never got my pencil back!

144. Pencil?

145. You know, you raked it in right before I found you.

146. Oh! Uh... That wasn't a licorice stick?

147. Licorice! Mmm.

148. The justice friends!

149. 3 of earth's mightiest heroes!

150. Joining forces under one roof

151. to face the challenge of everyday life!

152. Starring...

153. Major glory,

154. val halen,

155. and the infragible krunk

156. in...

157. Hey, puppet pal clem.

158. I just heard a funny joke.

159. Do you want to hear it?

160. Lay it on me, puppet pal Mitch.

161. What do you get when you cross a zebra and a trench coat?

162. Hey, I do not know.

163. What do you get when you cross a zebra and a trench coat?

164. A bonk on the head.

165. I don't get it.

166. Why, of course you don't.

167. You've gone dumb from being bonked on the head too much.

168. Why, I'd be dumb, too,

169. if I was bonked on the head as much as—

170. Major glory! Val halen!

171. Yes, krunk?

172. On the TV, puppet pal Mitch,

173. he came up to puppet pal clem,

174. and guess what he did!

175. Oh, um, let me see...

176. Oh, I know. Did he, um...

177. Bonk him on the head?

178. Yes. It was funny.

179. I'll bet.

180. Look, krunk. You've been sitting there,

181. watching that TV puppet pals marathon for the past4 days.

182. Aren't you even in the least bit tired?

183. No.

184. Well, val halen and I have had enough.

185. We're going out to the roller rink.

186. Again?

187. But seriously, krunk.

188. Try and get some sleep, hmm?

189. Sleep, schmeep.

190. Schmeep?

191. Sheep!

192. One...

193. Well, come on.

194. Huh?

195. The masters are waiting. We're late as it is.

196. You did remember your toothbrush, didn't you?

197. Good. You won't need it.

198. Well, come on.

199. Bonk, bonk, bonk.

200. Duh, come in.

201. Welcome, infragible krunk.

202. Welcome to the puppet pal palace.

203. Wow!

204. Wait.

205. The puppet pal palace, you mean?

206. Bonk on the head!

207. Oh, boy!

208. But how do krunk get up there?

209. Up where?

210. But seriously, krunk, welcome!

211. Uh, krunk can't believe it really you.

212. In the fleece!

213. Say, krunk, would you like to hear a joke?

214. Would I!

215. Ok.

216. Hey, puppet pal clem,

217. can you guess what day it is?

218. Uh, is it bonk day?

219. Yes, it is.

220. You liked that one, did you?

221. Ok, krunk. It wasn't that funny.

222. Krunk!

223. Relax!

224. Ok. But, hey. Krunk want to be a puppet pal, too.

225. Ok. Whatever!

226. Oh, boy! Krunk love you guys!

227. Oh, krunk. This is stupid.

228. It'll be funny.

229. Hey, puppet pal clem.

230. Hey, puppet pal Mitch.

231. Oh, look! Here comes our new bestest friend,

232. puppet pal krunk.

233. Clem & Mitch: Hey, puppet pal krunk.

234. Hey, puppet pal Mitch!

235. Hey, puppet pal clem!

236. Puppet pal clem, do you mind

237. if I put this golf ball on your head?

238. No. Go right ahead.

239. Ok. Now, I have a question, puppet pal clem.

240. What is 2 plus 2?

241. Duh, is it bonk on the head?

242. No, it's...

243. Fore!

244. Oh, you see, krunk. I told you this was stupid.

245. Wait!

246. You think that's funny?

247. What's wrong with you?

248. Can't you see how complicated and contrived that joke was?

249. And another thing. Why am I using a golf club?

250. I'm supposed to be using my bonk stick.

251. Bonk stick equals comedy. Golf club equals not comedy.

252. Being a puppet pal is a serious bonkness.

253. What do you think, I just hop out of my bonk bed,

254. eat some bonkfast, and then bonk clem on the head all day? Well—

255. major glory: Hey! Quit bonking our friend!

256. What?

257. Our justice friend!

258. Oh, no! The justice puppets!

259. Let's bonk 'em!

260. Ok. Ok!

261. Ok! We give up. You win.

262. Major glory! Val halen! Wait! Then who...

263. What's going on here?

264. Well, krunk, we thought you were spending too much time watching TV

265. and not enough time being a superhero,

266. so we tried to turn you against your so-called funny friends.

267. But you didn't, 'cause we came,

268. we saw, and we bonkered.

269. And you call yourselves superheroes.

270. You want a piece of me, junior?

271. You're bonking up the wrong tree, buddy.

272. You both driving krunk

273. bonkers!

274. Ah, it was all a dream.

275. I wouldn't say that.

276. Aah!

277. Hey, puppet pal clem.

278. Yeah, puppet pal Mitch.

279. That's the last time we stay up watching

280. the 4-day justice friends marathon.

281. Mm-hmm. You said it.

282. Good night, puppet pal clem.

283. Good night, puppet pal Mitch.

284. Puppet pal clem, there's a spider in your bed!

285. Bonk!

286. Ah!

287. Time now for a nice sit.

288. Hey! What do I look like? A chair?

289. No.

290. "I" looks like this.

291. Summer camp.

292. A grim time for every child,

293. when in the midst of the gleeful summer months,

294. he is torn away from his comfortable home,

295. and forced into savagery.

296. These poor souls live in primitive hovels

297. and struggle to maintain even human decency.

298. It is horror.

299. What are you so happy about, Dexter?

300. I thought you hated camp.

301. I do. But I am not going to regular camp.

302. I am going to a cool camp.

303. Dexter, you wouldn't know cool if it was tattooed on your retina.

304. First of all,

305. I am surprised you even know what a retina is.

306. Secondly, I'll bet my camp turns out cooler than yours.

307. It's a deal!

308. I don't know how to tell you this,

309. but I'm going to space camp.

310. Space? Been there, done that.

311. I am going to a fully operational modern agricultural environment,

312. complete with a high-tech, super cyber techno highway gigabyte.

313. Oh, yeah. A farm with a tractor.

314. They have more than a tractor!

315. Ooh!

316. I think that's my bus coming.

317. Cool, huh, Dexter?

318. No.

319. Kids' voices: Yeah! Farm camp!

320. You Dexter?

321. Yes.

322. No time to chat, son.

323. Get in. Let's go.

324. I am waiting for the bus to camp.

325. If you need directional assistance, I will be happy to help.

326. Son, don't play games.

327. Get in. We got a long trip back.

328. You meanthis the bus to camp?

329. Wouldn't you know it?

330. Wake up, little one.

331. We're here.

332. Finally. I could use a bit of, uh,

333. civilization?

334. Come on,

335. let me introduce you to the family.

336. My name's Jebediah.

337. This here's my very plain wife.

338. I just call her wife.

339. Down there's little Ezra

340. and his sister— they're the children—

341. and our senior citizen, good old grandma.

342. She don't move much,

343. but she makes one heck of a scarecrow.

344. Caw!

345. We strive for simplicity here, Dexter.

346. We do without all those modern conveniences you take for granted.

347. Like neural net computers?

348. Like plumbing.

349. Just give our way a chance, Dexter.

350. You'll grow to like it in time.

351. We have.

352. Welcome to space camp. We know you'll enjoy it here.

353. Whee!

354. Dee Dee: This is fun!

355. Day one,

356. I have seen the wasteland.

357. There is no technology here, only brute force.

358. But I have a plan.

359. In a few days, I should have everything I'll need to show them the light.

360. So, Dexter, how do you like it here?

361. It's boring! What do you do for fun?

362. Fun? What is this fun?

363. You know, pleasurable activity.

364. Oh, that! We have that!

365. Come on!

366. There she is!

367. You can go first.

368. Come on, Dexter. Churn!

369. It's, how do you say, fun! Isn't that the best?

370. Dee Dee, this will test your g-force tolerance.

371. Whatever!

372. 3, 2, 1...

373. Whoo!

374. Marvelous. She's magnifique. Exquisite.

375. Children, supper time.

376. Mmm! Now that's good eatin'.

377. Yes, sir. Finger lickin' good.

378. Excuse me.

379. I have gone 8 days without science.

380. I can feel my mind slowly slipping away.

381. But I must hold on,

382. for the plan is almost complete.

383. Oh, my candle's burned out.

384. Hey, Jebediah!

385. Aah!

386. My eyes!

387. Look! I made a potato-powered light, just for you!

388. Evil! I'll be havin' none of this!

389. You must be punished!

390. And it was evil, I tell you.

391. It glowed an evil glow.

392. He's a bad seed.

393. He needs to be punished.

394. But how?

395. Well, first we heat up some tar...

396. Dexter, thinking: Oh, Dexter,

397. what have you gotten yourself into?

398. These people are going to,

399. gulp, hurt you.

400. And they're in the middle of nowhere!

401. I can only hope for a miracle.

402. Huh?

403. Hi, Dexter!

404. Dee Dee!

405. She came from the sky.

406. It must be the...

407. The magical crop fairy!

408. Boy, am I glad to see you!

409. These people are crazy!

410. But they dress so cool!

411. The magical crop fairy has given us her blessing.

412. This calls for a celebration.

413. I'll say. I mean, caw!

414. Dee Dee: Dexter! You win the bet!

415. Farm campis way more fun!

416. Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group and U.S. department of education

417. captioning performed by the national captioning institute, inc.

418. Enter at your own peril,

419. where impossible things may happen

420. that the world's never seen before.

421. public performance of captions prohibited without permission of national captioning institute