1. Lindsay's Mirror DepotCopy !req
2. is Detroit's one stopCopy !req
3. for all your mirror needs.Copy !req
4. We have round mirrors,Copy !req
5. wall mirrors,Copy !req
6. rectangle mirrors,Copy !req
7. golden mirrors,Copy !req
8. rustic mirrors,Copy !req
9. fancy mirrors,Copy !req
10. baby's first mirror,Copy !req
11. brown mirrors.Copy !req
12. We have every kind
of mirror in the worldCopy !req
13. that we could find.Copy !req
14. Lea, I thought we kept telling youCopy !req
15. to take us out in post.Copy !req
16. And I kept telling you I can't do that.Copy !req
17. Well, buckle up, everybody,Copy !req
18. 'cause we are not leaving this roomCopy !req
19. until we get this right.Copy !req
20. - Oh, actually, it's 6:00.
- You can barely see us.Copy !req
21. Let's put a pin in this
till Monday morning.Copy !req
22. Great job, everybody.Copy !req
23. You have plans for the weekend?Copy !req
24. Uh, yeah, I'm gonna have
dinner at your house.Copy !req
25. You?Copy !req
26. Yeah.Copy !req
27. Yeah, I'm...Copy !req
28. I'm having dinner with my best friend.Copy !req
29. Let's do it.Copy !req
30. Ah, but first,Copy !req
31. I have to take a little tripCopy !req
32. to the third floor.Copy !req
33. Ah, the third floor.Copy !req
34. Yes, old magic number three.Copy !req
35. I take it the Browns are
going to the Super Bowl?Copy !req
36. Yeah. I first have to, uh,
drop the kids off at the poolCopy !req
37. and then I'm going to,
uh, crap in that pool.Copy !req
38. Mm-hmm, and you're gonna
do it in the lovely,Copy !req
39. pristine, quiet majesty...Copy !req
40. - Yes.
- Of the third floor bathroom.Copy !req
41. - Yes, of course.
- For your journey, sir.Copy !req
42. - Thank you, my friend.
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
43. Have a fantastic poop.Copy !req
44. - Morning, Sheila.
- Morning, Sheila.Copy !req
45. Morning, boys.Copy !req
46. Lindsay of Lindsay's
Mirror Depot called.Copy !req
47. She wants to see the commercial.Copy !req
48. Well, that would make three of us.Copy !req
49. Shall we?Copy !req
50. Uh, one minute.Copy !req
51. The third floor is...Copy !req
52. calling my butthole's name.Copy !req
53. Is it, uh...Copy !req
54. Oh, Frederick!Copy !req
55. Why, who is it?Copy !req
56. It's the third floor.Copy !req
57. Well, I declare,Copy !req
58. I'm coming to poop on you.Copy !req
59. Actually, poop and pee.Copy !req
60. I got to do both.Copy !req
61. I... I'm talking as Sam now.Copy !req
62. I don't know what you're doing.Copy !req
63. Yeah, no, it's me. It's Sam.Copy !req
64. Oh. Well, if you're traveling,Copy !req
65. you are going to need your suitcase.Copy !req
66. Why, thank you, my good man.Copy !req
67. Of course.Copy !req
68. Did you get outside this
weekend, or did you...?Copy !req
69. The phone lines are off,Copy !req
70. so distribute the extension listCopy !req
71. and Wi-Fi password.Copy !req
72. Also, make sure everybodyCopy !req
73. breaks down their empty
cardboard boxes for recycling.Copy !req
74. Tim. It's over.Copy !req
75. It's over. The third floor is over.Copy !req
76. Sam, slow down. What
are you talking about?Copy !req
77. So okay, so I went downstairsCopy !req
78. to poop, and then, uh...
You... I went downstairs.Copy !req
79. There's a bunch of people,
and there's... there'sCopy !req
80. - a business down there, and...
- You sped up.Copy !req
81. - You sped up.
- A password...Copy !req
82. Sam, slow down. What's wrong?Copy !req
83. We can't poop on the
third floor anymore.Copy !req
84. Take it back.Copy !req
85. What the hell?Copy !req
86. Take it back.Copy !req
87. Stop trying to kill me.Copy !req
88. You're frickin' stronger than me.Copy !req
89. Who cares?Copy !req
90. Ned, red alert.Copy !req
91. Yo, Tim, Sam.Copy !req
92. My favorite ad guys.Copy !req
93. Oh! Got a commercial for you.Copy !req
94. it's just wet-ass food.Copy !req
95. Not now, Ned.Copy !req
96. There are intruders in the building.Copy !req
97. No, that's that new tech company.Copy !req
98. They just moved in. They're pretty cool.Copy !req
99. Moved in? As in full-time?Copy !req
100. Yeah. They're legit too.Copy !req
101. They're doing all these renovations.Copy !req
102. Like, they're fixing stuff up.Copy !req
103. Right upstairs with that.Copy !req
104. Oh, while I got you guys here,Copy !req
105. I want to get your pictures,
'cause everybody has to getCopy !req
106. these new ID badges now.Copy !req
107. - Are you serious?
- Do we even get lanyards?Copy !req
108. Cheese.Copy !req
109. Oh, those shoulders.Copy !req
110. And that neck.Copy !req
111. Thanks, Ned.Copy !req
112. Jesus Christ, that neck.Copy !req
113. Bye, Tim.Copy !req
114. What the...Copy !req
115. Hold the door.Copy !req
116. Thanks.Copy !req
117. Sorry.Copy !req
118. You rode your bike, huh?Copy !req
119. DUI?Copy !req
120. No, it's just good exercise,Copy !req
121. good for the environment.Copy !req
122. - You guys are up on four?
- Yeah.Copy !req
123. Tim Cramblin,
Cramblin-Duvet Advertising.Copy !req
124. Been in the building for decades.Copy !req
125. Many decades, hundreds of years.Copy !req
126. Sam Duvet.Copy !req
127. I'm his best friend, also co-boss.Copy !req
128. Toby Hart, DTC.Copy !req
129. We're a tech company out of Denver,Copy !req
130. and we are super excitedCopy !req
131. to be moving our
headquarters here to Detroit.Copy !req
132. Didn't even have to change the D.Copy !req
133. What sort of techs do you do?Copy !req
134. Automated customer communication.Copy !req
135. Basically, we want to do for
the service repair industryCopy !req
136. what Home Depot did
for hammers and nails.Copy !req
137. Oh.Copy !req
138. Third floor.Copy !req
139. See you around, neighbors.Copy !req
140. That guy sucks, right?Copy !req
141. Tip to tail, piece of shit.Copy !req
142. But new tech company
is good for the city.Copy !req
143. It's good for the city.Copy !req
144. Good for the city.Copy !req
145. I mean I think hammers
did more for Home DepotCopy !req
146. than Home Depot did for hammers.Copy !req
147. Right? I mean, like,
how do you even buildCopy !req
148. a Home Depot without the hammer?Copy !req
149. - Right?
- Right?Copy !req
150. Let's go check in with Lea.Copy !req
151. Uh, you go ahead, my good man.Copy !req
152. But I still have a stinky
little Santa Claus up my butt,Copy !req
153. and the only chimney
is behind Sheila's desk.Copy !req
154. Aw.Copy !req
155. Hello, Sheila.Copy !req
156. Sam.Copy !req
157. Uh, you want to maybe go get a coffee?Copy !req
158. No, I'm just fine.Copy !req
159. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
160. Uh, maybe you want to go get a cof...Copy !req
161. Uh, like, a tea?Copy !req
162. Maybe, like, a smoothie?Copy !req
163. I'm fine.Copy !req
164. Can you please leave your
desk for a little bit?Copy !req
165. Why?Copy !req
166. Why?Copy !req
167. Fine.Copy !req
168. Where are we on this?Copy !req
169. We have round mirrors,Copy !req
170. wall mirrors,Copy !req
171. rectangle mirrors.Copy !req
172. It's getting there.Copy !req
173. It's getting there.Copy !req
174. Can we just zoom in here,Copy !req
175. pull this out, stretch it,Copy !req
176. then digitalize it?Copy !req
177. No.Copy !req
178. We're close.Copy !req
179. What does "digitalize" mean?Copy !req
180. We're close!Copy !req
181. I'm not gonna apologize
for that, Sheila.Copy !req
182. - It's fine.
- All right, look.Copy !req
183. I don't like it any
more than you do, okay?Copy !req
184. But that's just the
world we're living in.Copy !req
185. I said it's fine.Copy !req
186. If we don't poop, we die, Sheila.Copy !req
187. Is Sheila refusing to poop again?Copy !req
188. You've got Lindsay on line one!Copy !req
189. Hey, Lindsay, you're
on with Tim and Sam.Copy !req
190. - This is Tim.
- This is Sam.Copy !req
191. Hi, guys. Now, and...Copy !req
192. And when can I see the commercial?Copy !req
193. 'Cause it was due last Friday.Copy !req
194. Lindsay, this is Tim. I
thought we said this Friday.Copy !req
195. No, no, we said last Friday.Copy !req
196. Ah, Lindsay, this is Sam.Copy !req
197. Let's go ahead and chalk
that up to a miscommunication.Copy !req
198. Lindsay, this is Tim.Copy !req
199. Yeah, we bungled that on our end,Copy !req
200. but we'll definitely haveCopy !req
201. something to show you by this Friday.Copy !req
202. Lindsay, Sam. Yeah, we want to make sureCopy !req
203. that thing's absolutely
perfect for you, okay?Copy !req
204. Boys, this is Sheila.Copy !req
205. We lost Lindsay.Copy !req
206. Sheila, this is Tim.Copy !req
207. Can we try and get
Lindsay back on the line?Copy !req
208. Tim, Sheila.Copy !req
209. I'm working on it.Copy !req
210. Sheila, this is Sam.Copy !req
211. Thank you, Sheila.Copy !req
212. That was pretty good.Copy !req
213. No, it was not.Copy !req
214. No, it definitely wasn't.Copy !req
215. Yeah, I'll send a follow-up emailCopy !req
216. to Lindsay when I get home.Copy !req
217. Oh, you don't have to.Copy !req
218. You can send it from here now, actually.Copy !req
219. Yeah, those buttmunches on threeCopy !req
220. installed fiber-optic Wi-Fi
for the whole building.Copy !req
221. Now grab your perfect
little pecker and start...Copy !req
222. - What's that?
- It's a JOI video.Copy !req
223. It's jerk-off instructions.Copy !req
224. They tell you how to jerk off?Copy !req
225. They tell you why to jerk off.Copy !req
226. We really are living in the future.Copy !req
227. Grab your private area and yank.Copy !req
228. You know, as much as I hate
that DTC took away our bathroomCopy !req
229. and made us get security badges,Copy !req
230. they haven't been all
that bad for the building.Copy !req
231. Oh, I couldn't agree more.Copy !req
232. You know, I say, welcome, DTC.Copy !req
233. Oh, come on!Copy !req
234. "Saving Detroit"?Copy !req
235. Oh, eat shit.Copy !req
236. You eat shit, asshole!Copy !req
237. Tim, not you. Them.Copy !req
238. Oh. Yeah, eat shit!Copy !req
239. "The new face of the Motor City"?Copy !req
240. I'm honestly mad, and I don't get mad.Copy !req
241. - You don't. You get even.
- I do.Copy !req
242. Smug son of a bitch
has been here one week.Copy !req
243. They're on the cover of a magazine?Copy !req
244. We've been here our entire lives.Copy !req
245. We've never been on
the cover of a magazine.Copy !req
246. Well, "Chubby Buddies."Copy !req
247. Yeah, "Chubby Buddies."Copy !req
248. You hungry?Copy !req
249. I'm starving.Copy !req
250. Let's get something to eat.Copy !req
251. "Saving Detroit."Copy !req
252. They're not even from
Detroit. We're from Detroit.Copy !req
253. No, I'm from Detroit.
You're from suburbs.Copy !req
254. Don't say that anymore.Copy !req
255. You can't just waltz into the
city and claim it as your own.Copy !req
256. Yeah, you can't just
throw on a Tigers cap,Copy !req
257. eat a Coney dog, and all
of a sudden you're Kid Rock.Copy !req
258. - He's from the suburbs too.
- Come on.Copy !req
259. Why are we stopping?Copy !req
260. Hey, Sam, Tim.Copy !req
261. Toby.Copy !req
262. This is Abigail.Copy !req
263. - Hey, guys.
- Hey.Copy !req
264. You work in the building too?Copy !req
265. Uh, yeah, we do.Copy !req
266. For hundreds of years, right?Copy !req
267. That's a stupid joke. I
don't like that joke anymore.Copy !req
268. We're on the fourth floor.Copy !req
269. Oh, hey, Toby,Copy !req
270. I just wanted to personally thank youCopy !req
271. for saving our city.Copy !req
272. Yeah, thanks for
reaching into the garbageCopy !req
273. and pulling us out.Copy !req
274. Oh, you guys saw the magazine thing.Copy !req
275. That is so embarrassing.Copy !req
276. But you know, whatever
helps the business.Copy !req
277. - Mm-hmm.
- Saving Detroit.Copy !req
278. I guess we're gonna have to
start wearing capes to work.Copy !req
279. Hey, we're gonna do a
pedal pub at 6:00 tonight.Copy !req
280. Should be supes fun.Copy !req
281. It's a bar on wheelsCopy !req
282. that you pedal around.Copy !req
283. You guys want to join?Copy !req
284. A pedal pub?Copy !req
285. Ah, we can't.Copy !req
286. We're buried too deepCopy !req
287. under the ashes of our smoldering city.Copy !req
288. You're funny, Tim.Copy !req
289. Actually, I'm not. Sam's the funny one.Copy !req
290. Well, when I have time to prepare.Copy !req
291. Hey, we were gonna have
lunch at a place on Gratiot.Copy !req
292. Is that a safe area?Copy !req
293. Yeah, it's a safe area.Copy !req
294. This is Detroit, not
a third world country.Copy !req
295. It says it's only a 12-minute walk.Copy !req
296. - Walk?
- Are you insane?Copy !req
297. Absolutely take a car.Copy !req
298. Absolutely.Copy !req
299. Just keep your heads above
ya, you know what I mean?Copy !req
300. Look up. Stay off your phone.Copy !req
301. Thanks for the tip.Copy !req
302. We have round mirrors,Copy !req
303. wall mirrors,Copy !req
304. rectangle mirrors.Copy !req
305. No.Copy !req
306. See, that doesn't work.Copy !req
307. I've checked every
frame of footage twice.Copy !req
308. This is the closest thing we haveCopy !req
309. to a clean shot of a mirror.Copy !req
310. I can still see Sam in it.Copy !req
311. You know, uh, in the end,
what you're gonna want to doCopy !req
312. is digitalize it.Copy !req
313. That's not a real thing.Copy !req
314. You keep saying that.Copy !req
315. Well, we have a lot of work to do,Copy !req
316. and we are fresh out of tomorrows,Copy !req
317. so we're gonna have
to work late tonight.Copy !req
318. Oh, you know what? Actually, I...Copy !req
319. I think I'm just gonna go home.Copy !req
320. I'm... yeah, I'm not
feeling too hot, so...Copy !req
321. How many hot dogs you have for lunch?Copy !req
322. - Three.
- Well, there's your problem.Copy !req
323. You're starving.Copy !req
324. Your body's literally eating itself.Copy !req
325. Let me see if I have any
emergency dogs in my desk.Copy !req
326. - I bet I do.
- Actually, you know what, pal?Copy !req
327. That's okay. I'll just see you tomorrow.Copy !req
328. - You sure?
- Yeah, sure.Copy !req
329. - All right, feel better.
- Thanks, pal.Copy !req
330. - Sam?
- Uh-huh?Copy !req
331. I love you and I trust you.Copy !req
332. Sam.Copy !req
333. I hate it when it's just the two of us.Copy !req
334. Why?Copy !req
335. Not as fun.Copy !req
336. Yeah, well, your breath stinks.Copy !req
337. Why don't you try flipping that?Copy !req
338. Flip the front and the back.Copy !req
339. Dying while flying.Copy !req
340. Night, Ned.Copy !req
341. Night, Tim.Copy !req
342. Whoo!Copy !req
343. DTC.Copy !req
344. Sam Duvet!Copy !req
345. This is so much fun.Copy !req
346. When do we stop? Soon?Copy !req
347. You're so funny.Copy !req
348. We just got started.Copy !req
349. We've got another two hours!Copy !req
350. Oh, no.Copy !req
351. I'm...Copy !req
352. mad!Copy !req
353. Because it's all the meats.Copy !req
354. Yeah, don't hold the door.Copy !req
355. I said, don't hold the door!Copy !req
356. Morning, Sheila.Copy !req
357. Good morning, Sam.Copy !req
358. Oh!Copy !req
359. Well, there he is.Copy !req
360. The man of the hour.Copy !req
361. Good news, buddy.Copy !req
362. I was, uh, talking to Abigail,Copy !req
363. and she said that the DTC...Copy !req
364. Can, uh, actually help usCopy !req
365. with the mirror commercial.Copy !req
366. Yeah. Mm, mm.Copy !req
367. Uh, she said that they
could, uh, digitalize it.Copy !req
368. Huh. No shit.Copy !req
369. I knew that was a thing.Copy !req
370. DTC to the rescue again.Copy !req
371. They should start wearing capes to work.Copy !req
372. Capes.Copy !req
373. Capes.Copy !req
374. That's funny.Copy !req
375. Yeah.Copy !req
376. Are we really doing this?Copy !req
377. Yeah, we're doing it.Copy !req
378. Doing what?Copy !req
379. Oh, Sam.Copy !req
380. I was just so gutted yesterdayCopy !req
381. that you felt downCopy !req
382. because we'd been working so hard,Copy !req
383. so I went ahead and rented usCopy !req
384. one of those supes fun pedal pubs.Copy !req
385. You did?Copy !req
386. Is there a problem, Samuel?Copy !req
387. No.Copy !req
388. No?Copy !req
389. You're good to ride?Copy !req
390. Not sore for some reason?Copy !req
391. Nope.Copy !req
392. Great.Copy !req
393. I'm just glad to have my buddy back.Copy !req
394. So let's get up and get out there.Copy !req
395. - Come on, my friend.
- Yeah, all right.Copy !req
396. - Yeah.
- Let's hit the road.Copy !req
397. I'm gonna hit the road.
I'm so happy about it,Copy !req
398. I'm gonna just kind
of laugh on my way up.Copy !req
399. Fun, isn't it?Copy !req
400. It sure is.Copy !req
401. And it's even more funCopy !req
402. that we're doing it for
the first time together.Copy !req
403. Sure is, pal.Copy !req
404. What's wrong?Copy !req
405. You seem a little tired, old friend.Copy !req
406. - I do?
- Yeah.Copy !req
407. I don't feel tired.Copy !req
408. You want to talk about tired?Copy !req
409. Sheila's barely even pedaling.Copy !req
410. That just means more exerciseCopy !req
411. for the two of us, old pal.Copy !req
412. Right, old buddy.Copy !req
413. I mean, we could stop at any time.Copy !req
414. You do hate exercise.Copy !req
415. You know, I used to hate exercise,Copy !req
416. and then all of a
sudden, as if by magic,Copy !req
417. I decided to love itCopy !req
418. without telling my best friend.Copy !req
419. Where are you guys going?Copy !req
420. To a bar that doesn't move.Copy !req
421. And then there were two.Copy !req
422. Then there were.Copy !req
423. You were feeling sick last night.Copy !req
424. How'd you recover so quick?Copy !req
425. I just went right home
and went straight to bed.Copy !req
426. I saw you!Copy !req
427. You were on the bike pub with DTC!Copy !req
428. Fine, I lied!Copy !req
429. And you know what? They're not that bad.Copy !req
430. Not that bad?Copy !req
431. They're just pretending
to be from Detroit.Copy !req
432. Who cares?Copy !req
433. They're not going anywhere.Copy !req
434. They're here now.Copy !req
435. It doesn't matter.Copy !req
436. Then why did you lie to me about it?Copy !req
437. Because, Tim, sometimesCopy !req
438. you always get mad about everything.Copy !req
439. No, I don't!Copy !req
440. What would you have said
if I told you I wantedCopy !req
441. to cut out of work early
to go ride pedal pubsCopy !req
442. 'cause I liked some girl?Copy !req
443. I'd have choked you out!Copy !req
444. I'd have blocked you!Copy !req
445. You like some girl?Copy !req
446. Yeah, Abigail.Copy !req
447. Why didn't you just tell me this before?Copy !req
448. Why couldn't you have said
all this back at the office?Copy !req
449. 'Cause this honestly looked fun to me.Copy !req
450. I didn't know you would have to pedal.Copy !req
451. I know. Who wants to pedal a bikeCopy !req
452. while you slug these bad boys?Copy !req
453. I really just want to
sit back and slug beers.Copy !req
454. That's all I want to...Copy !req
455. And we're getting on the highway.Copy !req
456. Oh, crap!Copy !req
457. We're gonna die!Copy !req
458. Yeah, back at ya!Copy !req
459. Hey, Lindsay, this is Tim.Copy !req
460. Did you get a chance
to see the commercial?Copy !req
461. I loved it.Copy !req
462. The mirrors were gorgeous.Copy !req
463. Hey, Lindsay, this is Tim.Copy !req
464. Glad you liked how gorgeous they were.Copy !req
465. How'd you make 'em so gorgeous?Copy !req
466. Ah, Lindsay, this is Sam.Copy !req
467. I can speak to that.Copy !req
468. We had a tech company digitalize it.Copy !req
469. - It's brilliant.
- Go ahead and run it.Copy !req
470. Guys?Copy !req
471. Are you guys there?Copy !req
472. Tim?Copy !req
473. Sam?Copy !req
474. Linds, this is Tim.Copy !req
475. Will do.Copy !req
476. Till next time. Bye-bye.Copy !req
477. Boom. Ba-da
bing, Ba-da boom.Copy !req
478. It's easy peasy.Copy !req
479. You and me, forget about it.Copy !req
480. Everybody knows.Copy !req
481. Whew.Copy !req
482. - Oh, Christ!
- Oh, yeah.Copy !req
483. My legs.Copy !req
484. There you go. Back in, back in.Copy !req
485. - Oh.
- Put your little legs up.Copy !req
486. Yeah. Hey.Copy !req
487. Sorry I made you do
back-to-back pedal pubs.Copy !req
488. Sorry I brilliantly deceived youCopy !req
489. and, uh, so I could do the first one.Copy !req
490. Yeah, no worries.Copy !req
491. It's actually pretty fun to do it.Copy !req
492. Yeah, it actually is really
fun. I had a great time.Copy !req
493. I would honestlyCopy !req
494. take out the drinking.Copy !req
495. I was thinking the exact same thing.Copy !req
496. - I don't even...
- Oh, Frick!Copy !req
497. - Oh, Christ!
- Come on.Copy !req
498. Hey, Tim, Sam.Copy !req
499. Hey.Copy !req
500. I just wanted to thank you guysCopy !req
501. for helping us out on our commercial.Copy !req
502. No problem.Copy !req
503. Always have time to
help a fellow Detroiter.Copy !req
504. Hey, uh, tonight we're going "fowling,"Copy !req
505. which is like a... It's
like football and bowling,Copy !req
506. - kind of like...
- That sounds really fun.Copy !req
507. My boyfriend would love that.Copy !req
508. Nope, we can't.Copy !req
509. We got to work, so...Copy !req
510. You just invited us.Copy !req
511. That's not how I remember it.Copy !req
512. You can come if you'd like, though.Copy !req
513. Why are we stopping?Copy !req
514. Detroit Belts?Copy !req
515. They're actually from Seattle.Copy !req
516. Hey, Toby.Copy !req
517. It's good for the city.Copy !req
518. So what's your name?Copy !req
519. Fat mirrors,Copy !req
520. thin mirrors,Copy !req
521. glass mirrors,Copy !req
522. itty-bitty cat mirrors,Copy !req
523. weird mirrors.Copy !req
524. Please come and take
a look at our mirrorsCopy !req
525. and yourself in one of our mirrors.Copy !req