1. Desperate Housewives S02E20 2nd audio It Wasn't Meant to HappenCopy !req
2. I'm granting you temporary custodyCopy !req
3. until we get a straight
answer from the birth father.Copy !req
4. Gabrielle got exactly what she wanted.Copy !req
5. If Edie doesn't know, then that means
you just cheated on her, with me!Copy !req
6. Susan got fooled again.Copy !req
7. I'm also a member of S.A.Copy !req
8. And Bree got too much...Copy !req
9. Sex Addicts Anonymous.Copy !req
10. information.Copy !req
11. Karl Mayer didn't pray often.Copy !req
12. But when he did,
it was usually to ask for God's helpCopy !req
13. in breaking up with a womanCopy !req
14. and to spare him the nasty dramaCopy !req
15. that usually accompanied
such callous and unexpected departures.Copy !req
16. Over the years,
Karl had dumped dozens of women,Copy !req
17. and not one of them
had ever seen it coming.Copy !req
18. Every retreat
was always meticulously planned,Copy !req
19. right down
to the personalised stationary.Copy !req
20. Hence, his record
of successful getawaysCopy !req
21. from women who did not
wanna see him go.Copy !req
22. So when he decided
to break up with Edie Britt,Copy !req
23. Karl prayed to God yet againCopy !req
24. to help him avoid
all the unnecessary drama.Copy !req
25. Unfortunately for Karl...Copy !req
26. God was in the mood...Copy !req
27. to be entertained.Copy !req
28. Come on.Copy !req
29. What the hell is this?Copy !req
30. Edie, baby, calm down.Copy !req
31. "Let's be honest with ourselves.
We haven't been happy in a long time."Copy !req
32. Who are you to tell me I haven't been
happy, you miserable son of a bitch?Copy !req
33. I have been ecstatic!Copy !req
34. OK. I'm the one
who hasn't been happy then.Copy !req
35. - Then why did you propose to me?
- I don't know.Copy !req
36. I told every woman in this town
that we are getting married,Copy !req
37. and all you have to say to me is,
"I don't know"?Copy !req
38. What do you want me to say?Copy !req
39. - I'm sorry.
- What's going on?Copy !req
40. Is there someone else?Copy !req
41. Oh, my God.Copy !req
42. Oh, crap.Copy !req
43. Come on! Come on!Copy !req
44. As he sat there,
Karl couldn't help but wonderCopy !req
45. why God had forsaken him.Copy !req
46. It never occurred to him that God...Copy !req
47. might be a woman.Copy !req
48. God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,Copy !req
49. the courage to change the things I canCopy !req
50. and the wisdom to know the difference.Copy !req
51. The members
of the Fairview chapter of A.A.Copy !req
52. ended every meeting with a prayer.Copy !req
53. And while most were asking God
for help in resisting temptation,Copy !req
54. Bree Van De Kamp
was busy thinking thoughtsCopy !req
55. that were downright sinful.Copy !req
56. Amen. Keep coming back.
It works if you work it. Amen.Copy !req
57. I think you'd love the opera.
The music and the voices,Copy !req
58. it's just all so passionate.Copy !req
59. Yeah, 300-pound sopranos
seducing balding tenors.Copy !req
60. - That'd be hot.
- You making fun of me? Huh?Copy !req
61. Bree...Copy !req
62. Yes?Copy !req
63. Maybe a little bit.Copy !req
64. - What's going on here?
- Claude?Copy !req
65. We made plans. Remember?Copy !req
66. I'm sorry. I was just about...Copy !req
67. Yeah, I saw what you
were just about to do.Copy !req
68. I'm sorry, Peter, but who is this?Copy !req
69. This is Claude. He's my sponsor.Copy !req
70. Oh, your A.A. sponsor?Copy !req
71. No. I'm his other sponsor.Copy !req
72. For my sex addiction.Copy !req
73. Oh.Copy !req
74. Damn it, Peter. What did I tell you?Copy !req
75. Avoid lust triggers.Copy !req
76. - And what is she?
- Come on, don't do this, man.Copy !req
77. She's a lust trigger. A lust trigger!Copy !req
78. Excuse me,
I don't know what that means,Copy !req
79. but could you please stop saying it?Copy !req
80. Where's your chip? Give it to me.Copy !req
81. Do you remember
how low you'd sunk when we met?Copy !req
82. This represents 12 months of hard work,Copy !req
83. not giving in to your urges.Copy !req
84. If you want to blow all that
on this woman,Copy !req
85. just tell me now so I can stop
wasting my time working with you!Copy !req
86. I don't want to blow it.Copy !req
87. Good.
Then tell the pretty lady goodbyeCopy !req
88. and that you can't socialise
with her anymore.Copy !req
89. And do it quick. I'm hungry.Copy !req
90. Bad news.Copy !req
91. Ed wants us to push through tonight
and finish the Edelstein Realty pitch.Copy !req
92. We're not presenting for weeks.
Why not start tomorrow?Copy !req
93. How would that help Ed
avoid his marital problems?Copy !req
94. - What?
- Oh, he's right.Copy !req
95. I hear Ed fighting with Fran on the
phone every day through the walls.Copy !req
96. - That explains all our working hours.
- You lucked out, Scavo.Copy !req
97. Darlene talked him into cutting
people with kids loose.Copy !req
98. Great! Let's go
before he changes his mind.Copy !req
99. Doesn't include you, Senior VP.Copy !req
100. - Ed wants you in the conference room.
- You're kidding!Copy !req
101. You're his security blanket.
He stays, you stay.Copy !req
102. Jerry, can you
help me get the kids?Copy !req
103. Yeah.Copy !req
104. - Thanks, Jer.
- Sure.Copy !req
105. Lynette, get those
mock-ups together, will you?Copy !req
106. Jerry, I didn't know you had a kid.Copy !req
107. Yeah. Um, out of wedlock.Copy !req
108. Oh.Copy !req
109. So see you in the morning.Copy !req
110. I'm sorry I'm late.Copy !req
111. What's going on?Copy !req
112. Karl broke up with Edie.Copy !req
113. Oh, my God.Copy !req
114. Yeah, apparently,
he was seeing someone.Copy !req
115. Really? Did he say who it was?Copy !req
116. I know who she is.Copy !req
117. She's a man-eating,
scum-sucking ho-bag!Copy !req
118. No, he did not say.Copy !req
119. When Karl dumped you,
I thought that it was all your fault.Copy !req
120. Yeah, I figured that...Copy !req
121. you were a nag or bad in bed.Copy !req
122. But now I... Now I see
that you were just a victim too.Copy !req
123. We have a bond, Susan.Copy !req
124. It's like we're sisters.Copy !req
125. There's even a pretty one
and an ugly one.Copy !req
126. Edie!Copy !req
127. Oh, I'm just saying
that Karl screwed us both.Copy !req
128. Yes. Like you wouldn't believe.Copy !req
129. Guys, I'm all for bashing exes,Copy !req
130. but let's save a little of our hate for
his partner in crime, the other woman.Copy !req
131. They're always coming up with excuses
to justify being a home-wrecker.Copy !req
132. "He wouldn't have been
with me if he was getting it at home."Copy !req
133. "You're the love of my life.
She's just the runner-up."Copy !req
134. Oh, look, the baby's
doing something really cute.Copy !req
135. - She's sleeping.
- Like an angel.Copy !req
136. Look, I think we all know
that Karl is a dog,Copy !req
137. but if these tramps weren't laying out
the buffet, he wouldn't be chowing down.Copy !req
138. Every situation is different. It's hard
to judge until we know all the details.Copy !req
139. Which, obviously, I don't know,
because how would I know?Copy !req
140. She's a slutty, slutty whore.
Absolutely.Copy !req
141. Yeah.Copy !req
142. You sure she needs that?
I just put sunscreen on her.Copy !req
143. Yes, she needs the bonnet.
It completes the outfit.Copy !req
144. Oh, for God sakes, Gabby.Copy !req
145. She's never too young
to start accessorising.Copy !req
146. All the neighbours are out today,Copy !req
147. and I want them to see how happy
we are and wish they were us.Copy !req
148. Hey. The baby's a beauty.Copy !req
149. We think so, but we're a little biased.Copy !req
150. Oh, wow. She's got my eyes.Copy !req
151. Huh?Copy !req
152. Oh, I'm Dale. Dale Helm.
I'm the baby's birth father.Copy !req
153. Oh, well, hi, Dale. Nice to meet you.Copy !req
154. A lot of people
have been looking for you.Copy !req
155. I know. Lawyers and stuff.Copy !req
156. I got kind of held up
in Florida longer than I thought.Copy !req
157. - Spring break, right?
- Yeah.Copy !req
158. Oh, man, we were wasted 24l7.Copy !req
159. I got the message and just thought
my friends were messing with me.Copy !req
160. Those butt-wads!Copy !req
161. Well, it's a good thing he's here.Copy !req
162. We can take him to the lawyer's office,Copy !req
163. and you can sign over
full custody to us.Copy !req
164. OK.Copy !req
165. Yeah, uh, the thing about that isCopy !req
166. I'm gonna want the baby.Copy !req
167. Come on, you guys,
we don't have to make this ugly.Copy !req
168. You're trying to take our baby!
How is it not gonna be ugly?Copy !req
169. Keep walking, Gabby. Don't engage him.Copy !req
170. Listen, Mr Solis...Copy !req
171. You listen! We were granted custody.
If you want her, you talk to the judge!Copy !req
172. - What is the hold-up?
- They told me I gotta talk to a judge.Copy !req
173. - What are you doing, Frank?
- It's his baby. Give it to him!Copy !req
174. - Like hell!
- Mrs Solis. Can I see the baby?Copy !req
175. - No!
- No!Copy !req
176. Dale, just do it already!Copy !req
177. - I'm not just gonna kidnap it.
- They did!Copy !req
178. It is your baby. Just take it!Copy !req
179. Try it.Copy !req
180. Frank...Copy !req
181. Get in, you moron.Copy !req
182. Looks like you're doing
a good job with her.Copy !req
183. - Dumb-ass!
- She seems clean.Copy !req
184. Like I said,
we have been very happy here,Copy !req
185. and I'm sure you will be too.Copy !req
186. - Well, we just love it.
- Yeah.Copy !req
187. Once the stairs are repaired,
I'll show you the basement.Copy !req
188. What's going on?Copy !req
189. The house just sold.Copy !req
190. Start packing.Copy !req
191. Put Caleb in an institution.
It's where he belongs.Copy !req
192. My mom would never
let strangers take care of him.Copy !req
193. Call the police.
Then it's not up to her.Copy !req
194. If I call the police,
my mom and I go to jail with Caleb.Copy !req
195. We've been hiding a murderer.Copy !req
196. Now, look, if we...Copy !req
197. If we do move,
I promise I will call you every day.Copy !req
198. I don't need a phone buddy!
I need a boyfriend!Copy !req
199. - Would you calm down?
- Don't tell me what to do!Copy !req
200. You know,
I could go to the police myself.Copy !req
201. - Danielle!
- I just... I love you so much,Copy !req
202. I would do anything to keep you here.Copy !req
203. Yeah, I see that now.Copy !req
204. You can't leave me alone here.
You have to think of something.Copy !req
205. Don't worry.Copy !req
206. I will.Copy !req
207. Oh, my God!Copy !req
208. Ed, hey.Copy !req
209. I am so sorry, but obviously, that
was just meant for Tom's eyes only.Copy !req
210. Honest mistake. Don't worry about it.Copy !req
211. OK.Copy !req
212. Thanks. Well,
I'm gonna go back in my officeCopy !req
213. and continue to feel
like a huge pervert.Copy !req
214. At least you and Tom have a love life.Copy !req
215. Well, we do the best we can,
given the circumstances.Copy !req
216. Better than Fran and I.
We're dead in that department.Copy !req
217. I don't wanna bore you with the details.Copy !req
218. I appreciate that.Copy !req
219. You know, Ed, I don't want
to pry into your personal business,Copy !req
220. but if you are
having problems in that area,Copy !req
221. you don't have to be resigned to it.Copy !req
222. What are you suggesting? Hookers?Copy !req
223. No, Ed Ferrara doesn't pay for sex.Copy !req
224. I mean, you and Fran
could spice it up a bit.Copy !req
225. You know,
get the old juices flowing again.Copy !req
226. Oh, I see.Copy !req
227. Kind of like,Copy !req
228. "I'd like to lick you
from head to foot"?Copy !req
229. OK, well, that wasn't my best
work. But you can't deny results.Copy !req
230. IMing works.Copy !req
231. When I go home tonight,
Tom and I are going to...Copy !req
232. OK, I'm gonna be exhausted,
so I'll probably just lay there.Copy !req
233. But trust me, Tom is gonna go to town.Copy !req
234. It's something to think about,
Lord knows.Copy !req
235. Know what the sad truth is?
I have been thinking about hookers.Copy !req
236. OK!Copy !req
237. Uh... well, I hope that helped.Copy !req
238. And I'm just gonna go back and finish
so we can all get out of here.Copy !req
239. Let me guess.Copy !req
240. You're not here for a bear claw.Copy !req
241. No, I'm not.Copy !req
242. You're wasting your time.Copy !req
243. Look, you don't have to worry
about Peter. Not while he's with me.Copy !req
244. Yeah? Why is that?Copy !req
245. Because when it comes to sex,
I have an unwavering moral compass.Copy !req
246. Truly, a man could beg
and plead all day long,Copy !req
247. and it wouldn't make any difference.Copy !req
248. So since I have
such strong self-control,Copy !req
249. there's really no reason
for us to end our friendship.Copy !req
250. The guy's a ticking bomb.Copy !req
251. You have no idea, the kind of depravity
that comes with this disease.Copy !req
252. Waking up
in a stranger's bed every morning,Copy !req
253. cruising the park at night
looking for somebody to get off with,Copy !req
254. compulsive masturbation
every chance you get!Copy !req
255. For guys like Peter and me,
there's no beauty in the sex.Copy !req
256. It's an empty and ugly compulsion.Copy !req
257. Well, I am sorry, but the Peter
I know has a little more...Copy !req
258. Hold up.Copy !req
259. Claude, I need some... I need some help.Copy !req
260. - What're you doing here? Are you using?
- No.Copy !req
261. But I bought a bag.Copy !req
262. You're an embarrassment to me. Give.Copy !req
263. There's a meeting over on Tenth Street.
You go there.Copy !req
264. You call me after.Copy !req
265. - I'm sorry.
- Get the hell out of my shop.Copy !req
266. I'm also a sponsor at Cocaine Anonymous.Copy !req
267. Well, aren't you the Renaissance man.Copy !req
268. - Are we done here, princess?
- Not yet.Copy !req
269. You obviously have an encyclopaedic
grasp of everything depraved,Copy !req
270. but you don't have the slightest ideaCopy !req
271. about the power
of a loving relationship.Copy !req
272. This is all you are to Peter.
Something to satisfy his addiction.Copy !req
273. I think Peter
is a better man than you do,Copy !req
274. and I am not gonna
let you keep us apart.Copy !req
275. Try and stop me.
Peter does everything I tell him to do.Copy !req
276. That's the one thing
you can depend on with addicts.Copy !req
277. They're weak.Copy !req
278. Excuse me.Copy !req
279. Excuse me. May I ask you something?Copy !req
280. Yes, ma'am.Copy !req
281. If a citizen,
an ordinary citizen, like myself,Copy !req
282. knew of someone holding
a significant amount of drugs,Copy !req
283. what would my responsibilities be,
you know, under the law?Copy !req
284. What's all this?Copy !req
285. This one, I got the day I found out
Karl was doing it with his secretary.Copy !req
286. You'll find this particularly helpful.Copy !req
287. It's got a chapter called "
You're Only Hurting Yourself."Copy !req
288. Yeah, I'm just really not
into the whole reading thing.Copy !req
289. Well, um, why don't
we get you out of here?Copy !req
290. Let's go see a feel-good movie.Copy !req
291. Why are you being so nice to me?Copy !req
292. Well, I just wanna help.
So how about that movie?Copy !req
293. You know how I like to heal?Copy !req
294. I get hammered.Copy !req
295. Uh... well, um...Copy !req
296. then I should go
and let you get started with that.Copy !req
297. You really wanna help me?Copy !req
298. Good. Cos I'm gonna need
a designated driver.Copy !req
299. Oh. Uh...Copy !req
300. OK.Copy !req
301. How could he be arrested for cocaine
possession? Claude swore he was clean.Copy !req
302. It's just awful, isn't it?Copy !req
303. You never know what people
are doing behind your back.Copy !req
304. Would you like some milk
with your cookies?Copy !req
305. Thanks.Copy !req
306. It's just... he was
the best sponsor I've ever had,Copy !req
307. and I don't know what I'm gonna do now.Copy !req
308. Well, I have been doing some thinking,
and here's a thought:Copy !req
309. Why don't I be your sponsor?Copy !req
310. You gotta be kidding.Copy !req
311. You don't know
squat about sex addiction.Copy !req
312. Well, cravings are cravings.
All you really need is a friend to callCopy !req
313. when you start
having inappropriate thoughts,Copy !req
314. and I can be that friend.Copy !req
315. There's more to it than that.Copy !req
316. Claude rescued me from some
pretty nasty scenes over the years.Copy !req
317. Well, if you were in trouble,
I could handle it.Copy !req
318. How can you be so sure?Copy !req
319. Because I can be very strong for
those people that I really care about.Copy !req
320. How can you have any feelings for me?
You've only known me for a few weeks.Copy !req
321. Yes, and in that time I've come to learnCopy !req
322. that you're good and kind and smart.Copy !req
323. And, yes, you have a little problem
that you need some help with.Copy !req
324. But I'm willing to be there for you.Copy !req
325. So, what's the big deal?Copy !req
326. If you saw me at my worst,
you might not like me so much.Copy !req
327. Peter, let me be your rock.Copy !req
328. Taking care of people is what I do best.Copy !req
329. Drink your milk.Copy !req
330. Uh-uh-uh! Mm-mm.Copy !req
331. I asked for extra spicy.Copy !req
332. I'm pretty sure you said medium.Copy !req
333. Are you?
Well, maybe if you'd written it down,Copy !req
334. you would've spared yourself
the walk of shame back to the kitchen.Copy !req
335. Edie, why are you torturing that girl?Copy !req
336. That is her. That is the one
that Karl is in love with.Copy !req
337. We have been here a million times.
You should see the way she flirts.Copy !req
338. When she comes back, I'm gonna
shove this pitcher in her perky mug,Copy !req
339. - and when she's...
- Let's not make a scene.Copy !req
340. For the sake of argument, let's...
let's say that it's someone else.Copy !req
341. You know, probably it would be
a vulnerable, lonely womanCopy !req
342. who Karl just took advantage of.Copy !req
343. And what if this poor, confused soulCopy !req
344. begged your forgiveness?Copy !req
345. What would you say?Copy !req
346. I'd say...Copy !req
347. "Too little, too late, bitch,"
and then I'd kick her.Copy !req
348. Oh.Copy !req
349. You don't have to worry about that. I'm
positive it's her. Who else could it be?Copy !req
350. Karl's office is all guys.
The only women he sees are...Copy !req
351. Are me, Julie, that lesbian
that does his taxes and you.Copy !req
352. You know what?Copy !req
353. It is her.Copy !req
354. Really? Why?Copy !req
355. She just spit in your wings.Copy !req
356. You got my back?Copy !req
357. Uh... sure.Copy !req
358. Here you go. Extra spicy...Copy !req
359. You did it on purpose.Copy !req
360. You are going to pay!Copy !req
361. Get off me, you...Copy !req
362. Mayer! Four on one!Copy !req
363. A little help!Copy !req
364. So, uh, when we leave...Copy !req
365. who are you gonna miss the most?Copy !req
366. I don't know.Copy !req
367. Yeah, you do.
You said goodbye to her yet?Copy !req
368. No.Copy !req
369. Look, man, it's OK if you like her.Copy !req
370. I think Danielle really likes you too.Copy !req
371. - Really?
- Yeah.Copy !req
372. She told me she'd be sad
if you left and didn't say goodbye.Copy !req
373. You know, I think she might
even want you to give her a little kiss.Copy !req
374. But Danielle doesn't
even like me in her room.Copy !req
375. She gets mad.Copy !req
376. Yeah, I talked to her about that.Copy !req
377. She feels really bad.Copy !req
378. But you know what? She told me
if you come in her room again,Copy !req
379. she won't get mad.Copy !req
380. And Caleb?Copy !req
381. She's gonna act like
she doesn't want you to kiss her.Copy !req
382. But she does.Copy !req
383. Dale Helm, like all of the
students at Parsons Christian Academy,Copy !req
384. was taught that his future
was safely in God's hands.Copy !req
385. What he didn't know
was that Gabrielle SolisCopy !req
386. was about to force a fumble.Copy !req
387. All right, guys, you all know next week
we're playing the Falcons!Copy !req
388. And we're gonna
fry up those birdies for dinner!Copy !req
389. Cos we're the Huskies!Copy !req
390. And who are the Huskies?Copy !req
391. God's team! God's team!
God's team! God's team!Copy !req
392. What are you doing? You can't be here!Copy !req
393. Let's talk turkey. What is it
gonna take to give up the baby?Copy !req
394. It's not gonna happen.
I gotta get back. I'm the quarterback.Copy !req
395. - It doesn't look right.
- OK, no, no, wait.Copy !req
396. What about a car? Or college?Copy !req
397. Tuition's a killer these days.
I could help you out.Copy !req
398. I don't need help. You hear
those cheers? Those are for me.Copy !req
399. Last game, I threw 246 yards.Copy !req
400. I can get into the college
of my choice.Copy !req
401. So why do you want to be a dad?Copy !req
402. These are your glory days!
A baby would ruin your life.Copy !req
403. I know. But Frank said he's
gonna take the baby off my hands.Copy !req
404. But it's not even his.Copy !req
405. Libby dumped him. He thinks if she sees
him acting mature, she'll take him back.Copy !req
406. No, no, no... I am not letting that
idiot use my baby as a bargaining chip!Copy !req
407. Hey, it's out of my hands.Copy !req
408. No, it doesn't have to be.Copy !req
409. OK, just do the right thing
and sign the release form.Copy !req
410. Look, I'm really sorry.Copy !req
411. Uhh.Copy !req
412. Before we adjourn today,
let's take a moment to bow our heads.Copy !req
413. Hello, everyone!Copy !req
414. I'm Gabby Solis, class of '94.
Whoo-hoo!Copy !req
415. I just wanted to give God a big
shoutout for this amazing season.Copy !req
416. The man upstairs
has definitely been on your side,Copy !req
417. and you wanna know why?Copy !req
418. Because you boys live clean.Copy !req
419. You keep your noses up,
you stay out of trouble,Copy !req
420. and you don't go around
getting strippers pregnant.Copy !req
421. And that's a good thing because if
one of you caused a scandal like that,Copy !req
422. not only would that guy
get kicked off the teamCopy !req
423. and lose all of his scholarships,Copy !req
424. but God would drop your school colours
so fast it'd make your head spin.Copy !req
425. And then the football season
would go to hell.Copy !req
426. No pun intended.Copy !req
427. So my point is, do the right thing,
and no one gets hurt.Copy !req
428. Signed, sealed, delivered.Copy !req
429. Lily's ours.Copy !req
430. So, what do you think?
Are you staying late again,Copy !req
431. or can I finally have dinner
at home with my wife?Copy !req
432. God, I don't know.
I'm gonna go check with Ed.Copy !req
433. OK.Copy !req
434. Hey. Any luck with that IMing thing?Copy !req
435. No, not really.Copy !req
436. I was online chatting
with Fran a while ago,Copy !req
437. and I asked her what she was wearing,
and she said "a yellow blouse."Copy !req
438. - OK, that's good. Then what?
- Then...Copy !req
439. That's it. I just kind of blocked.Copy !req
440. - Blocked?
- I don't know what else to say.Copy !req
441. You're an award-winning copywriter.Copy !req
442. Yeah, jingles for oatmeal,
not soft-core porn.Copy !req
443. For God sakes, it's not brain surgery.
Is she still online?Copy !req
444. I think so.Copy !req
445. "I love the way that blouse
clings to your body."Copy !req
446. - "Are you joking?"
- Uh...Copy !req
447. Mm-mm-mm. "Nothing funny
about those beautiful breasts."Copy !req
448. "Yeah? What did you want to do to me?"Copy !req
449. Uh...Copy !req
450. Ed, your conference call is ready.Copy !req
451. Oh, God. I almost forgot about that.Copy !req
452. OK, I gotta go take this. You keep
going cos you're doing great.Copy !req
453. No! I am not doing this for you!Copy !req
454. - Just...
- Wha?Copy !req
455. Mmm!Copy !req
456. "Touch every inch of your bodyCopy !req
457. until you're trembling."Copy !req
458. "Oh, yeah, I'll bite you good."Copy !req
459. "Hell, yeah. First,Copy !req
460. I want you to touch yourself."Copy !req
461. "Oh, yeah!"Copy !req
462. "I'm on my way."Copy !req
463. Mm.Copy !req
464. Hello?Copy !req
465. Bree, it's Peter. And I'm in trouble.Copy !req
466. Hey there.Copy !req
467. Hi. I'm looking for Peter McMillan.Copy !req
468. Not sure I know him. Should ask
my wife. She organised the party.Copy !req
469. Hey, Judy. Get over here
and act like a hostess!Copy !req
470. Come on in, come on, come on.Copy !req
471. Hey there.Copy !req
472. Things are just getting started.Copy !req
473. After you take off your clothes,
feel free to jump right in.Copy !req
474. No, no. I'm good.Copy !req
475. I'm just... I'm here
to pick up my friend Peter.Copy !req
476. He locked himself in your bathroom.
I'm here to take him home.Copy !req
477. That guy. We were wondering
about him. The bathroom's there.Copy !req
478. Hey, is that your natural colour?Copy !req
479. - Yes, it is.
- Beautiful.Copy !req
480. I wish mine would do that.
This is out of a bottle.Copy !req
481. Yes, I'm aware of that.Copy !req
482. Peter?Copy !req
483. Peter, it's Bree, are you in there?Copy !req
484. What are you doing here?Copy !req
485. I'm a sex addict. What do you think?Copy !req
486. You can't be turned on
by what's going on out there, it's...Copy !req
487. Disgusting, isn't it?Copy !req
488. Yes! Why would you want
to come to a place like this?Copy !req
489. I didn't. I wanted you to come.Copy !req
490. I can't make you not have feelings
for me. But I can show you who I was,Copy !req
491. what my life was like.Copy !req
492. Well, that's not your life anymore.Copy !req
493. If I slip again,
this is where you could find me.Copy !req
494. Or someplace worse!Copy !req
495. Then what would you think of me?Copy !req
496. - Peter...
- Bree,Copy !req
497. it's dangerous to care about me.Copy !req
498. A lot of people have over the years,
and they all end up getting hurt.Copy !req
499. Rex said he'd always be faithful.Copy !req
500. George said he'd never hurt me.
As it turned out, they were both liars.Copy !req
501. So as long as you're honest with me,Copy !req
502. you'll be amazed
at what I can put up with.Copy !req
503. Now let's go home.Copy !req
504. Hey there.
Did you have a late night? I hope.Copy !req
505. It was horrible.
The whole thing blew up in my face.Copy !req
506. Why would you tell my wife
to bite my nipple off?Copy !req
507. I didn't! I didn't! Why would she?Copy !req
508. Oh, the honeymoon thing.Copy !req
509. Yeah, and it hurt like hell then too.Copy !req
510. It didn't take her long to figure out
that I let a stranger seduce her online.Copy !req
511. Oh, God.Copy !req
512. She was so mad she locked herself in the
bathroom and called a divorce lawyer.Copy !req
513. You're getting divorced?Copy !req
514. I spent two hours pleading with her
through the bathroom door,Copy !req
515. begging her not to leave me.Copy !req
516. And we finally managed to come to terms.Copy !req
517. What kind of terms?Copy !req
518. I promised her I would fire
the person who did it.Copy !req
519. - You're gonna fire me?
- No, of course not.Copy !req
520. You're too important here.
I'm gonna fire Tom.Copy !req
521. I told her it was him
that sent the IM's.Copy !req
522. What?Copy !req
523. I told her he had a problem
with boundaries. I'm sorry.Copy !req
524. I didn't want to do this,
but my marriage was on the line.Copy !req
525. You can't make my husband
your scapegoat. I won't let you.Copy !req
526. I don't have a damn choice!Copy !req
527. I can't be divorced, Lynette. I can't.Copy !req
528. He's under contract.Copy !req
529. If you just fire him, he'll sue you,
and I'll back him up. You need cause.Copy !req
530. Well, I guess I'll have to find cause.Copy !req
531. Shouldn't be too difficult,
if I look hard enough.Copy !req
532. Hey. How's the eye?Copy !req
533. Oh, it's still a little red,
but I think I got all the hot sauce out.Copy !req
534. That's good.Copy !req
535. So, um, you know the other day,Copy !req
536. when I said that thing
about us being sisters?Copy !req
537. When I said it, I really didn't mean it.Copy !req
538. Yeah, I kind of figured that.Copy !req
539. No, I mean, I really didn't mean it.Copy !req
540. But, um... now I do.Copy !req
541. Thank you. Thank you
for having my back.Copy !req
542. Do I have to worry about you
attacking any more waitresses?Copy !req
543. Nah, my bar-brawling days are over.Copy !req
544. Oh, you know, I've gotta go.
I have a meeting.Copy !req
545. I'll talk to you later.Copy !req
546. Are you Oliver?Copy !req
547. You must be Edie.
Pleasure to meet you.Copy !req
548. Likewise. I hear you're one
of the best private detectives in town.Copy !req
549. - I do what I can.
- Well, come on in, let's talk.Copy !req
550. Um, basically,
I just want you to trail my ex.Copy !req
551. He, uh... left me for another woman,Copy !req
552. and I want to nail that ho to the wall.Copy !req
553. Caleb? Hey, come on, buddy. Wake up.Copy !req
554. Caleb. It's time.Copy !req
555. Get away from me!Copy !req
556. Get away from her!Copy !req
557. Danielle, I want you to pick up
the phone and call the police.Copy !req
558. - No!
- What?Copy !req
559. Matthew and his mother
have been protecting Caleb.Copy !req
560. - They're in as much trouble as he is.
- I don't care.Copy !req
561. Mom, please, I love him.Copy !req
562. Please.Copy !req
563. If I hadn't been in the house,
he could have raped her. Or worse.Copy !req
564. He's locked in his room now, so...Copy !req
565. Needless to say,
the agreement between us is off.Copy !req
566. Caleb is dangerous,
and I want him put away.Copy !req
567. If he's not gone by tomorrow,
I'm calling the police.Copy !req
568. He will be. I promise you.
Can I go check on Danielle?Copy !req
569. Yes.Copy !req
570. Betty, I am serious.Copy !req
571. Either you do something or I will.Copy !req
572. Bree, stop worrying.Copy !req
573. I understand what needs to happen now.Copy !req
574. Danielle?Copy !req
575. Did it work?Copy !req
576. Perfectly. You did great.Copy !req
577. So I got some rates on some
mental hospitals around here.Copy !req
578. And there's one called Silvercrest
which actually seems OK.Copy !req
579. Put this ham in the fridge, will you?
I think I'll make it for dinner.Copy !req
580. I know you don't wanna talk
about this, but we have to.Copy !req
581. Mrs Van De Kamp's
gonna call the police.Copy !req
582. I promised I would never
institutionalise your brother.Copy !req
583. Mom...Copy !req
584. How long do you think it'd be
before he'd act out, hurt somebody?Copy !req
585. A couple of days, a week?Copy !req
586. They'd throw him in a straitjacket
and drug away what's left of his mind.Copy !req
587. He'd spend the rest of his life
at the mercy of strangers.Copy !req
588. If we don't he's gonna end up in prison.
And don't you think that's worse?Copy !req
589. Yes, of course I do.Copy !req
590. So, what the hell are we gonna do?Copy !req
591. Phenobarbital?Copy !req
592. It's easy, it's painless.Copy !req
593. Just a few extra drops.Copy !req
594. He simply falls asleep.Copy !req
595. Caleb was meant
for a better world than this, Matthew.Copy !req
596. It's time to give your brother
the peace he deserves.Copy !req
597. Who's the pretty girl?Copy !req
598. - Looks like it's Daddy's turn.
- I got her.Copy !req
599. Yes.Copy !req
600. - Mrs Solis?
- Yes?Copy !req
601. We have a court order
to take the Collins baby into custody.Copy !req
602. No, no, no, that's a mistake.Copy !req
603. We have paperwork.
The birth father signed away his rights.Copy !req
604. - The birth mother is protesting.
- What?Copy !req
605. Until the adoption is legally finalised,Copy !req
606. the birth mother
can still change her mind.Copy !req
607. And she has.Copy !req
608. No, no, no, no, no!Copy !req
609. - Gabby, wait!
- You!Copy !req
610. You don't even want to be a mother!Copy !req
611. Well, look, Frank quit using,Copy !req
612. and he got a good job down at the plant.
He's really stepped up.Copy !req
613. So?Copy !req
614. Well, so we're gonna give
the whole family thing a shot.Copy !req
615. I'll totally give you
all your money back.Copy !req
616. I don't want my money back!
I want my baby!Copy !req
617. Come on. Let's go.Copy !req
618. Carlos! No! Carlos, what's happening?Copy !req
619. No, ma'am, you don't understand.Copy !req
620. This is our baby!Copy !req
621. No! We've been feeding her,Copy !req
622. and we've been bathing her.Copy !req
623. And we wake up in the middle
of the night, and we rock her,Copy !req
624. which is crazy cos, if you knew me,
I don't do that! I don't do that.Copy !req
625. And my husband!
My husband, he sings to her!Copy !req
626. He sings!Copy !req
627. So you can't take her away!
It's too late!Copy !req
628. We've already fallen in love with her!Copy !req
629. Carlos, do something!Copy !req
630. No, you can't go! You can't...Copy !req
631. You can't take her! You can't take her!Copy !req
632. No!Copy !req
633. She's our baby!Copy !req
634. She's our...Copy !req
635. No!Copy !req
636. Please!Copy !req
637. There is a prayer
intended to give strengthCopy !req
638. to people faced with circumstances
they don't want to accept.Copy !req
639. The power of the prayer comes
from its insight into human nature.Copy !req
640. We ask God to grant us the serenityCopy !req
641. to accept the things we cannot change...Copy !req
642. Because so many of us rage
against the hand that life has dealt us.Copy !req
643. the courage
to change the things we can...Copy !req
644. Because so many of us are cowardlyCopy !req
645. and afraid to stand up
for what is right.Copy !req
646. and the wisdom
to know the difference.Copy !req
647. Because so many of us
give in to despair...Copy !req
648. when faced with an impossible choice.Copy !req
649. The good news for those
who utter these wordsCopy !req
650. is that God will hear you
and answer your prayer.Copy !req
651. The bad news is that sometimesCopy !req
652. the answer is "no."Copy !req