1.  Previously on
Dark Side of the Ring...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
2.  Every wrestling fan
knew Chris Benoit's work.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
3.  With a headbutt to the heart!Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
4.  This is my favorite page. The love
that Chris and Nancy always had.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
5.  Chris was always a great father,
very much about his family.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
6.  He was my hero, you know.
I looked up to him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
7.  I have never seen a closer friendship
than between Chris and Eddie.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
8.  - Eddie Guerrero has passed away.
- I thought, "My God, Chris."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
9.  I love you, Eddie.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
10.  He didn't handle it well.
Let me just say that.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
11.  Nancy started getting worried.
"I'm worried for Chris."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
12.  I just had this bad feeling.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
13.  More now on a developing story
in Fayette County.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
14.  The deaths of a wrestler
and his family.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
15.  In the wake of Chris Benoit's death,
the world is searching for answers.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
16.  What comes to light goes beyond
anything anyone could imagine.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
17.  People couldn't believe it,
couldn't fathom that it was possible.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
18.  It can't be real.
Like, where's my nephew?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
19.  The person that I knew
would not do this horrific thing.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
20.  I think this is gonna be gigantic.
It will affect WWE.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
21.  Question is,
was he on steroids at this time?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
22.  Did the blows to the head
Benoit received in the ringCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
23.  fundamentally change his brain?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
24.  It really, really was
the darkest time in my life.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
25.  The county is a laid-back community.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
26.  A family atmosphere.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
27.  Not a whole lot of crime.
It's pretty peaceful.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
28.  My name is Larry Alden.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
29.  I was with the Sheriff's office.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
30.  I was the lieutenant in chargeCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
31.  on the day of the Benoit incident.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
32.  I'd been a detective
for 15 or 20 years.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
33.  I'd probably seen Chris
once or twice a week at the gym,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
34.  which was in the middle
of Fayetteville.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
35.  He didn't talk a lot.
He was focused on his workout.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
36.  I never heard about him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
37.  I didn't even know where he lived
until the call came on the radio.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
38.  I run the security
for World WrestlingCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
39.  and one of our wrestlers is missing.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
40.  - And what's his name?
- Chris Benoit.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
41.  Okay. And he's a wrestler?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
42.  Yes, he's a religious gentlemanCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
43.  and yesterday,
he had a Pay Per ViewCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
44.  and he never showed up.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
45.  It's out of character for him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
46.  All right. We'll send somebody
out there to check on him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
47.  If you want to call us back
in 45 minutes.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
48.  If he's there,
we'll tell him to give you a call.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
49.  I was in my patrol car,
riding around the countyCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
50.  and was pretty close to the area
when the call went out.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
51.  I figured it was a welfare check.
Maybe he was sick, maybe drunk.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
52.  Didn't really know what.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
53.  I pulled up on scene
when the neighbor was walking over,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
54.  and I walked up and asked
if she had seen Mr. Benoit.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
55.  "It's been three or four days
since I've seen anybody there."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
56.  There was two large canines
in the yard.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
57.  I believe
they were German Shepherds.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
58.  We asked if she could move the dogs
elsewhereCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
59.  so we could go up there
and do the welfare check.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
60.  "Me and the dogs get along great.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
61.  I feed them
whenever they're out of town."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
62.  And she jumped the fence.
The dog's right there with her.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
63.  She walked them in there,
never holding them.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
64.  It was taking a little longer
than I thought it should takeCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
65.  but then she ran out the door,
screaming that, "Daniel's dead."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
66.  From "just a regular welfare check"
to "we got something more serious."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
67.  We crossed the fence at that time,
myself and Deputy Mundy.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
68.  And we went in through the side door,
which she had left open.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
69.  We drew our weapons,
not knowing what we'd come upon.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
70.  It was daylight, plenty of windows,
a lot of light coming in.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
71.  There was an odor in the house.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
72.  I looked over at Deputy Mundy.
I said, "Something's dead in here."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
73.  A stairway went up to a bedroom,
so we went up those stepsCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
74.  and that's where the juvenile child
was at, lying in bed.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
75.  I noticed the child
was laying on the bed, face down.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
76.  Mundy said, "Do we start CPR?"
And I said, "No." He'd passed away.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
77.  We started clearing all the rooms
and doors.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
78.  We found another room,
where we found Miss Benoit at.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
79.  She was laying on the floor,
wrapped up in a blanketCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
80.  or maybe a rug
or something like that.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
81.  Went downstairs to the basement.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
82.  A couple of large, open rooms.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
83.  And the last door we opened
was the gym door.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
84.  And that's where Mr. Benoit was at.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
85.  Because of the mirrors and the angle
Deputy Mundy was at, to my right,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
86.  she saw the reflection
at the far end of the room,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
87.  which might have been 10 feet away
from where he actually was.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
88.  And she said, "Show me your hands.
Fayette County Sheriff's Department."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
89.  She could not see he had cable from
a weight machine around his neckCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
90.  and had some weights on it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
91.  So I told her,
"He's right here. He's passed away."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
92.  Radio had called us,
asked if everything was okay.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
93.  And I told them it looked like
it might be a homicide and suicide.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
94.  It was within three minutes
of us walking back outsideCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
95.  that somebody
had strung crime scene tapeCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
96.  across the front of the property.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
97.  I remember I was driving home.
My son was with me.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
98.  And I got a call from a WWE writer.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
99.  He said, "Are you sitting down?"Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
100.  I'm like, "What's going on?"
He said, "Chris is dead."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
101.  I said, "What? Chris who?"
And he says, "Chris Benoit."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
102.  And I pulled over
and I just started bawling.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
103.  My son said, "Daddy, you cry funny."
I was just crying, just bawling.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
104.  At this time,
no one knew what happened.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
105.  So WWE is just thinkingCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
106.  that Chris Benoit has passed away,
along with Nancy and Daniel.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
107.  They're not thinking,
was it a break in?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
108.  Was it carbon monoxide?
What's going on?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
109.  You just know two friends are gone.
And no one has answers.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
110.  Vince McMahon, the chairman,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
111.  had to do something.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
112.  So we did
what we thought was right.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
113.  Tonight, this arena hereCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
114.  was to have been
filled to capacity...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
115.  with enthusiastic WWE fans.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
116.  We tried to honor the guy,
his family, his fans,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
117.  but we didn't have a full story.
Shame on us for that, I guess.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
118.  Tonight will be
a three-hour tribute...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
119.  to one of the greatest...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
120.  WWE superstars of all time.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
121.  We just know Chris Benoit is gone,
as is his family.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
122.  Of course, I'm gonna pay tribute
to my friend.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
123.  I would trust you, with me,
with my life, with my kids' livesCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
124.  'cause I know you, Chris,
I know your heart.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
125.  They asked if I wanted to be on it.
"Absolutely not."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
126.  I remember just sitting there,
dead with a bottle of vodka,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
127.  just drinking, like, you know.
Eddie's was bad but this was worse.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
128.  Chris was not just a great wrestler,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
129.  but one of my best friends
in this business.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
130.  We did not know all the information.
That's our fault.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
131.  We tried to serve the audience.
It was a major story.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
132.  It was hitting all the news sources,
and we had a TV show.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
133.  We wanted to update people,
but didn't have all the information.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
134.  But we didn't know we didn't.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
135.  The authorities said,
"This happened."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
136.  "Oh, guess what, we were wrong.
This is not what happened."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
137.  Chris was a guy
you'd wanna go to war with.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
138.  It was hard, because at that time,
some guys were,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
139.  in their speeches, praising Chris.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
140.  - Because Chris Benoit was my hero.
- I love you, Chris.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
141.  When I watched the Raw Tribute,
everybody was talking about BenoitCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
142.  and how great of a performer he was
and how amazing he was,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
143.  but I thought Regal's words
were very revealing.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
144.  Now, all I'm willing to say is thatCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
145.  Chris Benoit was undoubtedly...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
146.  the hardest-working man
in professional wrestling.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
147.  Afterwards, you found out
he lived in the same city as ChrisCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
148.  and knew a lot
about the fights Nancy and him hadCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
149.  or what Chris was going through.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
150.  I'm not sure who'd have noticed,
but knowing what I knew about him,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
151.  I started thinking,
"Wow, this is not good."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
152.  My sister told me to spoil myself,
go to the mall, get some makeupCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
153.  and have some wine with lunch
and go watch a movie.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
154.  I came out of the theater,
22 missed calls from my parents.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
155.  And my parents
wouldn't tell me anything.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
156.  They wanted me in my driveway
and inside before they told me.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
157.  That's how I found out.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
158.  And then, when it finally sunk in,
I just lost control of myself.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
159.  It was very difficult. I had to go
to the hospital and be sedated.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
160.  I was in Edmonton
and then this number kept calling.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
161.  My mum's cell, unknown number,
unknown number, unknown number.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
162.  And then, she finally answered it
and it was the police, RCMP.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
163.  So we left,
rolled down to the station.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
164.  She found out first.
I see her crying there.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
165.  She couldn't spit it out, so...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
166.  The cop told me they all passed away
over the weekend.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
167.  I punched him in the chest.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
168.  And then me and the cop
went for a walk. We talked.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
169.  And that, you know,
"Your dad loved you.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
170.  They all loved you,"Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
171.  and I thought it was a joke,
I really did.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
172.  Daddy.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
173.  It wasn't until after the show
that the details started coming in.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
174.  More on a developing story
in Fayette County,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
175.  the deaths of a wrestler's family.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
176.  Authorities sayCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
177.  the bodies were found
this afternoon in their home.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
178.  It's being investigated
as a murder-suicide,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
179.  but without crime lab reports,
exactly what happened is unclear.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
180.  That's when all these details came.
It's not just him that's dead,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
181.  it's Nancy and then Daniel as well.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
182.  That's when it went out of control.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
183.  The father killed his wife and son
and then committed suicide.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
184.  You didn't want to believe it.
Can't be true. But it was.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
185.  The evidence indicates that
it was a brutal and vicious murder.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
186.  It was something that showed
some sign of real rage.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
187.  I'm Matthew Randazzo V,
author of Ring of Hell,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
188.  the story of Chris Benoit
and pro wrestling's fall.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
189.  That week, that Friday,
Chris had a barbecue with Daniel.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
190.  That Friday evening,
Chris and Nancy argued.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
191.  Chris restrained Nancy with duct tapeCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
192.  and utilized a telephone cord
to strangle her.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
193.  Then placed a Bible
next to her body.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
194.  The beer cans and wine bottles
indicate he may have been drinking.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
195.  Next morning, on Saturday, Chris,
we assume gave his son XanaxCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
196.  and then murdered him in his room,
being suffocated by his father.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
197.  A Bible was then placed
next to Daniel, as well.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
198.  Chris made a phone callCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
199.  and told his friends Daniel and Nancy
both had a bad stomach virusCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
200.  and that he had to take them
to the hospital.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
201.  That night, Chris went to bedCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
202.  with the bodies of his wife and child
in the house.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
203.  On Sunday, his Internet searches
are chilling in retrospect.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
204.  One, for a Bible story
about the prophet ElijahCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
205.  and the resurrection of a dead boy.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
206.  Then, the quickest and most painless
way of breaking one's own neck.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
207.  Chris then went to his home gym
with a half-drunken bottle of wine.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
208.  He went to his lat machine.
He took the bar off.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
209.  Put a towel around his neckCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
210.  and he took the metal cord
and put it around his neck.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
211.  He set the weights to 240 pounds.
And then he released it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
212.  So it's a very bizarre scenario.
It's a very bizarre weekend.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
213.  And it doesn't leave many answers.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
214.  He was just a guy. My friend.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
215.  Nobody expects their friend
to kill their family. Like, what?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
216.  When I found out
what had really happened,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
217.  the shock is... you can't believe it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
218.  He had put his knee in her back
and essentially broke her back.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
219.  I couldn't fathom how cruel,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
220.  and how much pain
she went throughCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
221.  and how horrific
that must have been for her.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
222.  It was just unfathomable.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
223.  If Chris did give Daniel that,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
224.  you know, medication or pillsCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
225.  and suffocate him, you know,
shame on him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
226.  Daniel was innocent in all this.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
227.  We heard other things about...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
228.  the circumstances of him
putting the Bibles by their sidesCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
229.  and having a knifeCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
230.  that he planted under Daniel's bed
or something like that.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
231.  Still couldn't wrap my head
around it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
232.  It sounded like a bad horror movie.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
233.  And now I'm a part of...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
234.  humanizing a murderer? Strange.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
235.  I mean, to think that Nancy
was dead for two daysCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
236.  before Chris took his life.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
237.  How is that even logical
for this man who loved her so much?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
238.  Later, it turned out that
there was a Bible in the houseCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
239.  similar to the ones left
by Nancy and Daniel's bodyCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
240.  that Chris had left something
akin to a suicide note.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
241.  Something along the lines of,
"I'm preparing to leave this Earth."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
242.  So Chris did leave a suicide note.
He did know what he was doing.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
243.  He was lucid enough to understand
what was happeningCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
244.  and to consider taking a flight
to wrestle that nightCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
245.  on international television.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
246.  Good evening.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
247.  We came up on air, and Vince talking
and explaining what happened.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
248.  Last night, the WWE presented
a special tribute show,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
249.  recognizing
the career of Chris Benoit.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
250.  However, now, some 26 hours later,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
251.  the facts of this horrific tragedy
are now apparent.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
252.  Therefore, other than now,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
253.  there will be no mention
of Mr. Benoit tonight.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
254.  It was understood
that we were not to speak of Chris,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
255.  speak of anyone of that incident.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
256.  And by that next week,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
257.  Chris' name was erased
from everything involved with WWE.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
258.  I mean, when we did interviews,
we were not to mention Chris Benoit.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
259.  So that was really hard for us to doCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
260.  but because we all wanted our jobs,
it was understood.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
261.  I know WWE has kinda
erased his history in the business,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
262.  and I understand
and totally agree with what they did.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
263.  We're not gonna praise a guy
who murdered his wife or son.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
264.  Don't give him
any accolades for that.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
265.  I went to Nancy and Daniel's funeral.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
266.  You can't believe how sad it was.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
267.  I was the WWE representative,
just me. It was the shits.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
268.  People crying
and a kid being buriedCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
269.  and a woman being buried
for no reason.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
270.  No reason to die.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
271.  The WWE sent JR,
and I lost my cool with himCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
272.  and told him to his face
that he wasn't welcome at the wake.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
273.  It was all a work,
just fake garbage, nonsense.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
274.  I can see a work coming a mile away
and that's what I saw.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
275.  I was the most unwanted person
in the buildingCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
276.  because I was a WWE guy
and loved him as much as anybody.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
277.  Everybody was just a mess.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
278.  It's shitty and it's sad
and it's unfairCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
279.  because two people
could still be with us today.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
280.  And if Chris wanted to take his life
then so be it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
281.  But to take all of them...
I didn't go to Chris' funeral.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
282.  I was angry at that point.
Angry at Chris, for what he did.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
283.  His funeral was very private.
We didn't tell anyone.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
284.  That's when it all hit me at once.
I was crying my eyes out.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
285.  Who in the wrestling business
took care of your familyCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
286.  in the aftermath of this?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
287.  Is that a serious question?
Not a single person. No one.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
288.  Did anyone from the WWE reach out
to you and your family?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
289.  Chris Jericho and Chavo Guerrero.
That's it. Nobody else. Screw them.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
290.  They weren't there for me, you know,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
291.  they backed off
like I didn't even exist.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
292.  It was so hard, after the funeral,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
293.  'cause the media
was just nonstop, 24/7.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
294.  Tonight, the strange
and very sad case of Chris Benoit.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
295.  I didn't even watch the news.
I didn't watch TV for months.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
296.  I couldn't even watch wrestling.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
297.  The police tell usCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
298.  instruments of death were found,
not instruments of murder.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
299.  There'll be an autopsy report,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
300.  but there's a lot of confusion
about how this happened.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
301.  It really was the darkest time
in my life.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
302.  Benoit had
an intense onstage persona.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
303.  He was the Rabid Wolverine,
the Canadian Crippler.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
304.  The couple met when
her former husband drew up a scriptCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
305.  that put them in a relationship.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
306.  It made everything difficult.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
307.  It made everything
under a magnifying glassCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
308.  'cause CNN and Fox and everyone
were at the gates.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
309.  A double murder-suicide
with a 7-year-old kid is news.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
310.  But there's a point where you need
to let the family grieve.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
311.  All I really wanted to do
was to be with my niece and nephew.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
312.  The media's reaction was typical
because, A, they love a tragedy.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
313.  And they love to blame wrestling.
They had a field day.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
314.  Professional wrestlers are 20 times
more likely to die before age 45Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
315.  than professional football players.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
316.  A lot of the media
looks down at wrestling.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
317.  Now it was public enemy
number one.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
318.  Chris Benoit's diary is revealing
new info on his state of mind.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
319.  The wrestler wrote letters
to his best friend.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
320.  At one point, Benoit wrote,
"I'll be with you soon."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
321.  Mike Benoit believes
it's the diary of his son going mad.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
322.  We just didn't understand
this was going on in Chris' life.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
323.  I got a call from Chris' dad.
He knew my relationship with Chris.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
324.  The first thing he asked was, "Why?"Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
325.  From a father's standpoint,
I can understand how upset he was.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
326.  Unfortunately,
I didn't have any answers for him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
327.  People need to understand that,
that was not him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
328.  Not the person we knew,
the person I loved, my hero.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
329.  The term being thrown around
is "roid rage".Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
330.  Some say steroid abuse is rampant
at the organizationCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
331.  and everyone just turns a blind eye.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
332.  The media's initial response
was that this was roid rage.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
333.  Where do steroids stand
in the bizarre Benoit deaths?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
334.  Wrestling, when Chris started,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
335.  was discriminatory against people
who were not six-foot-plus tall,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
336.  who were not 250 pounds or more
and very, very muscular.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
337.  I understand Benoit used steroids
from when he was in high school.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
338.  In the months before the murders,
Chris received texts from NancyCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
339.  in which she made it very clear
she was tired of his steroid abuse.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
340.  Nancy directly accused him
of abusing steroidsCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
341.  to the point that he becameCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
342.  an angry
and violent and unhappy husband.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
343.  She said the WWE's
drug enforcement policyCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
344.  and testing regime was nonsense:Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
345.  a Wellness Program
which allegedly tested every wrestlerCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
346.  to make sure they weren't using
drugs or steroids.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
347.  At that time, instituting
a wellness program like that,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
348.  everybody was happyCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
349.  that some of these guys
were gonna get help.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
350.  Anything to help talent,
save guys from themselves.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
351.  After Eddie died, the WWE's testing
was super strict. Through the roof.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
352.  You couldn't even take an aspirin,
like, a high-powered aspirin,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
353.  unless you had a prescription,
and I'm not kidding.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
354.  It's so strict. "Rampant
steroid use?" Dude, you can't.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
355.  You can't go snort cocaine
or smoke weed or anything.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
356.  In practice, it was seen that
this initial version of the programCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
357.  had large loopholes in it,
and large blind spotsCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
358.  that allowed wrestlers to continue
to use drugs at a really large scaleCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
359.  without tripping the tests.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
360.  Speculation is running wild.
Did steroids play a role,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
361.  or is there another explanation?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
362.  With us is WWE Chairman
Vince McMahon.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
363.  WWE did everything they could
to combat any coverageCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
364.  that indicated that drug abuse
was the cause of the homicides.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
365.  This is not an act of rage.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
366.  It's an act of deliberation
that took three days.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
367.  It's not rage, be it steroid
or roid rage, whatever it's called.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
368.  It's all speculation until
the toxicology reports come back.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
369.  In his autopsy, Chris Benoit had
enormous amounts of testosterone,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
370.  and testosterone is still a steroid
that's banned in all major sports.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
371.  It leads to increased muscle growth.
Some folks have saidCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
372.  he had 10 times the normal amount
in his body.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
373.  Did Benoit pass the check
leading up to the murders?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
374.  Yes, preposterously, Chris Benoit
passed the wellness checks,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
375.  despite the irrefutable fact that he
took enormous amounts of steroids.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
376.  Well, after it initially happened,
I actually had nightmares.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
377.  It was very traumatic. As a female,
I tend to really get angry with him,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
378.  the man she thought
would protect herCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
379.  is the one that took her life.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
380.  There was a lot of stuff going on
that no one knew about.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
381.  A lot of volatile fights.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
382.  I'd always heard about Nancy,
she didn't take shit.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
383.  So I just know
there was a lot of volatility there.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
384.  That's the word I think was used,
"volatile".Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
385.  Sometimes Nancy would call me
and say she and Chris were fighting.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
386.  There was an incident in Tampa,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
387.  and Chris was upset.
They were driving to our houseCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
388.  and Chris went and busted
the windshield of their car.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
389.  Did you ever witness any abuse
going on in that relationship?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
390.  My sister called me to the houseCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
391.  and she called Mike Durham,
known as Johnny Grunge,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
392.  who was also a professional wrestler
that lived in the area.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
393.  Mike said, "I'll go wrangle Chris.
Don't do anything rash."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
394.  But it was already kind of done.
He hurt her.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
395.  I don't know if it was intentional
or accidental, but he hurt her.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
396.  Out of respect for the kids
he still has,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
397.  I won't go further into that.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
398.  She got a restraining order
against him,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
399.  and I went down
and stayed at the house.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
400.  Mike had him at a hotel there,
in the area.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
401.  Chris contacted me directly,
because Nancy wasn't answering,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
402.  and asked me
to talk to my sister on his behalf.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
403.  And please, please, please,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
404.  let him come
talk to her personally.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
405.  She called him,
and he came over the next dayCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
406.  and they were back together
a couple of days later.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
407.  Do I look back on that and say,
you shouldn't have gotten involvedCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
408.  and why did I take his call,
'cause that could have ended it?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
409.  Almost every day, I think about that.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
410.  When police found steroids
on the scene,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
411.  many assumed that explained it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
412.  The killer flipped out
because of drugs.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
413.  Or might there be
another explanation?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
414.  The initial media coverage
all focused on steroid use.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
415.  I said, there's no way.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
416.  I'm Chris Nowinski,
former WWE superstar,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
417.  and now I am a neuroscientistCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
418.  and run
the Concussion Legacy Foundation.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
419.  My wrestling career came to an endCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
420.  because I had
a series of concussionsCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
421.  that I didn't quite appreciate
were concussions.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
422.  I never stopped performing
until the damage was too much.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
423.  So I decided
I would start digging intoCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
424.  what else was known,
and it became a book.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
425.  Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy,
or CTE,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
426.  is a progressive,
degenerative brain diseaseCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
427.  that appears to be started
by hits to the head.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
428.  Oh, my God!Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
429.  Oh, man!
Anything goes. My God.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
430.  What I knew about CTE at that time
was there were four NFL cases.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
431.  Two had died by suicide,
and one had started hearing voicesCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
432.  and led the police on a chase
through upstate New YorkCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
433.  and died in a fiery crash
on the wrong side of the highway.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
434.  When I heard about what happened,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
435.  I remembered a conversation
with him, maybe six months prior.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
436.  He had sat next to me
in the locker room.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
437.  "I heard you're writing
a book about concussions."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
438.  He goes, "I'm interested
in what you're learning.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
439.  How many concussions had you had
before you had to retire?"Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
440.  And I said, "Well, at least six,
but I probably had more.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
441.  How many have you had?"Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
442.  And he said,
"I've had more than I can count.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
443.  I'll give you my number.
I want you to call me next week."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
444.  Next week, I called him.
It sounded like he was mid-argument.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
445.  He was clearly agitated.
Someone else was there.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
446.  "I can't talk. Can I call you back?"
And I said, "Sure."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
447.  I wonder if the reason
he was asking me to call himCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
448.  was that he knew
that something was going on,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
449.  but he didn't appreciate
what it was.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
450.  And so I decided I needed to know
if Chris had CTE.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
451.  With the media storm,
I couldn't imagineCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
452.  his family answering the phone.
But I said, "I'll give it a try."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
453.  Chris's father answered
on the second ring.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
454.  He was in a state of mind,
you can imagine,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
455.  when you've just lost your son
and learned what happened.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
456.  I told him my theory. And...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
457.  he immediately said,
"I want to see this done."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
458.  We have the brain in early July,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
459.  and I think, within about a month,
we knew it was positive for CTECopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
460.  and it was
a pretty severe case of CTE.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
461.  We held a press conference.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
462.  When you look at his brain,
it is, in fact, shocking.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
463.  Our findings showed extensive areasCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
464.  of tau protein deposition
throughout his brain.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
465.  Tau protein
is a marker for brain damage.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
466.  With Chris, he actually had a...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
467.  a severe case of CTE at 40 years old,
which is early to have it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
468.  It wouldn't just be areas
of his cortex or his brain stem,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
469.  but damage in areas
that you would thinkCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
470.  could influence emotional behaviors.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
471.  I believe
the degeneration of his brainCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
472.  changed what he was capable of.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
473.  If you get hit in the head
thousands of times,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
474.  your brain, essentially, can rot.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
475.  You get this damageCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
476.  that continues to spread
even once you stop getting hit,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
477.  and changes who you are,
how you behave, what you become.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
478.  I think about
when me and Chris would be talking,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
479.  and he would just be crying so much,
I wondered why he couldn't stop.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
480.  Does that go with the concussions?
With his brain?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
481.  You know, Eddie and Chris
took a lot of chair shots.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
482.  These chair shots
from years agoCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
483.  were hard and they were mean.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
484.  In the '90s,
we took chair shots to the head.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
485.  That was a badge of honor.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
486.  Meaning, someone would swing
a steel chair at your head...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
487.  Chris Jericho's helpless!Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
488.  And I literally remember,
you'd grit your teeth and...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
489.  you'd tense yourself
and tense your neck...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
490.  and just take it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
491.  They hit you on the head with it,
and you just take it, "Ah."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
492.  That was what you did.
That was expected.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
493.  If you had a concussion in wrestling,
you just shake it off.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
494.  Shake it off, go in there and do it.
All of us did it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
495.  I wrestled for 20-plus years.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
496.  It makes me wonder,
how much CTE do I have?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
497.  How much do other wrestlers have?
'Cause we all got it, to some extent.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
498.  Is this gonna be my end?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
499.  The incredible thing is, Harley Race
invents the Flying HeadbuttCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
500.  and tells everyone, "Don't do this.
It fucks your spine up horribly.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
501.  It ruins your old age."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
502.  Dynamite Kid hears that, does it
anyway, ends up in a wheelchair.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
503.  Dynamite Kid tells Chris.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
504.  Chris does it his whole career
and then loses his mind.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
505.  Oh, man.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
506.  There is a clear history
of people repeatingCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
507.  the most self-destructive story
imaginable, over and over again.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
508.  I think the Benoit tragedy
led to some institutional changes.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
509.  The awareness of what CTE isCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
510.  was never even a conversation point.
Now it is.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
511.  And finally, unprotected chair shotsCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
512.  and subsequent concussions
are now being addressed.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
513.  The one thing we've gotta do
is protect the athletes.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
514.  When you look
at what Chris Benoit didCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
515.  as a symptom of a medical problem,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
516.  whether drug use or brain damage,
I think that misses the point.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
517.  Ultimately, the core reason
this happened is:Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
518.  Chris made a decision
when he was very youngCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
519.  to do absolutely whatever it tookCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
520.  to succeed at his childhood dream
of becoming a pro wrestling star.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
521.  Whatever happened that weekend,
his story would've had a tragic end.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
522.  I think
his fate was sealed when Eddie died,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
523.  whether he knew it or not.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
524.  I doubt anyone could help
after that.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
525.  Not his kids, not his family,
not his other friends.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
526.  I just think that was the one guy
that he said,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
527.  "I can't do it
if Eddie's not with me."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
528.  Whatever it was
he was going through, you know,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
529.  I think he just continued
to shrink his whole worldCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
530.  until all that was left
was just whatever was in his headCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
531.  that caused him to snap,
and he fucking snapped.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
532.  It's not one thing.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
533.  I think that
it's a factor of alcohol and drugsCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
534.  and yes, possibly CTE
and stress and grief.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
535.  And all of those things
rolled togetherCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
536.  put him on a path that weekend
that he couldn't get off.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
537.  Chris was always gonna be my friend
and my brother.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
538.  I just know something was going on
with him that wasn't him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
539.  It's something
I'm still torn with,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
540.  because you love Chris,
you just hate what he did.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
541.  What he did is unthinkable.
Unforgivable.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
542.  But it's still hard for me
to separate my friendship with him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
543.  Matches that I had with him.
Moments, times, car rides.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
544.  I can always look at Chris
as one of the best performersCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
545.  our business has ever seen,
and just kinda leave it at that.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
546.  I get asked, "Should he be
in the Hall of Fame?"Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
547.  And I say, "Absolutely not. No."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
548.  If Chris were here
and we could talk to him,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
549.  he'd say, "Putting me in thereCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
550.  will be a distraction
from the whole event.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
551.  All it's gonna do is bring up Nancy,
the kids and their last 24 hours."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
552.  So I say, he does not belong
in the Hall of Fame, now or ever.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
553.  If two guys that were the same
basically their whole life,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
554.  and had the same reputation of just
being immaculate professionals,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
555.  the nicest guys,
and they both die very youngCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
556.  and one's legacy is acclaimed,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
557.  and one's is buried so that
you almost can't say his name.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
558.  If you would have told Chris,
"You know, when you die,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
559.  your name and your body of work
will be erased from existence,"Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
560.  it would have broke his heart.
He told me once,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
561.  "The critics are the criticsCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
562.  but if your peers respect you,
nothing else matters."Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
563.  So to find out
that he would have lost the respect,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
564.  not only of his peers
but his friends, his family,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
565.  I don't think he ever wanted that.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
566.  It almost ended the business.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
567.  What Chris did almost destroyed
the only thing that he ever loved,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
568.  from a professional standpoint.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
569.  The only thing he ever loved,
Chris Benoit almost destroyed it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
570.  That would've torn him apart as well.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
571.  So it leads us around to,
why did he do it?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
572.  I don't think anyone will ever
be able to answer that question.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
573.  People look at me different now,
because of what he did.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
574.  People talking shit behind my back.
Getting bullied.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
575.  Screw it.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
576.  I'm defending my family
and what I believe in, you know.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
577.  He loved them.
That definitely was not him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
578.  He's still my hero.
I think about him all the time.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
579.  I want them to recognize Nancy,
though.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
580.  She deserves the recognition
that she doesn't get.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
581.  That's the unfortunate part.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
582.  She needs to be remembered for...
a strong woman,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
583.  pioneering in this business,
and her talent.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
584.  And focus on that,
instead of what happened to her.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
585.  She's a Hall of Fame'r
all across the board.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
586.  She was a pioneer,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
587.  and one of the best
at a role that no longer exists.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
588.  As a pro wrestling manager,
she created and perfected the role.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
589.  And when she stopped doing it,
the role disappeared.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
590.  I would like nothing better
than to see Nancy, Nancy Benoit.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
591.  Once again,
you can't even say that name.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
592.  Woman. I would like nothing better
than to see WomanCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
593.  be put into the WWE Hall of Fame.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
594.  She was a great mom.
She was a beautiful friend.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
595.  And Nancy will always...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
596.  be the superstar
she was meant to be, in my mind.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
597.  Can I blow a kiss? You bet.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
598.  What do you remember the most
about Nancy?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
599.  I remember everything about her.
I remember how her hair smells.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
600.  She used to tuck me in
with both hands, real hard,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
601.  like, on both sides of the blanket,
to tuck me in.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
602.  Like she was putting a lock on me
to keep me safe.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
603.  To this day, when I get sad or upset
or stressed out,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
604.  I will tuck myself in on the sides
so that I feel more secure.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
605.  - What do you remember of Daniel?
- Everything.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
606.  I close my eyes
and I can see him doing everything.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
607.  He was our whole lives, all of us.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
608.  He was very, very, very, very loved
by our family, by his siblings.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
609.  He and his brother
were just thick as thieves.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
610.  Did you have any relationship
with the Benoit family afterward?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
611.  I tried. Unsuccessfully.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
612.  I was told,
I won't say by who,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
613.  that the children
wanted nothing to do with us.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
614.  Apparently, the children were told
we wanted nothing to do with themCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
615.  'cause of what their dad did,
which was absolutely not the truth.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
616.  My last trip with my family was
for WrestleMania XXIII in Detroit.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
617.  After the match,
we flew back to Atlanta.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
618.  Me, Nancy and Daniel.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
619.  My dad went to Mexico for a tour.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
620.  And then me, Nancy and Daniel
were just hanging around the house,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
621.  taking pictures, y'know,
out by the trees with the dogs.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
622.  And then, you know...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
623.  You're doing good, brother.
It's all good. Just let it out.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
624.  That's what this is all about,
brother. I'm sure.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
625.  David is absolutely a victim.
A great kid, dealt a bad hand.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
626.  It's not right.
He didn't do anything wrong.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
627.  He's an innocent bystander
in all of this.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
628.  You all right?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
629.  Okay.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
630.  - Too real. Too real.
- It's good for us. It's good for us.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
631.  I felt that,
because Chris killed his family,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
632.  that the family he left behindCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
633.  was automatically
blackballed from the world.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
634.  Like, they're gonna be blamed
for what Chris did.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
635.  To me,
those two needed to reconnect.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
636.  Talking with David, meeting Sandra,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
637.  knowing she had the same issues
and pain and hurt that David had,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
638.  and nobody will ever understand...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
639.  what they went through,
besides each other.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
640.  I thought if I could connect them,
give them a chance to talk,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
641.  they could move on and realize
they have family in each other.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
642.  Chris Jericho,
wrestling angel come to life,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
643.  he gave my number to my nephew
and my nephew's number to me.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
644.  We hadn't talked
since before everything.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
645.  So, 13 years ago,
the last time we saw each other.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
646.  It's been a very long time.
She finally called me. I answered.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
647.  We talked on the phone
for probably a good two hours.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
648.  And now, going to watch wrestling.
I still love it. It's in my blood.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
649.  Feels like we never were apart.
Felt like we just reconnected.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
650.  Nothing has changed.
She's still my Auntie Sza-Sza.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
651.  Chris lives on in David every day.
Nancy lives on in Sandra every day.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
652.  And I think they were both lost
when Chris and Nancy died.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
653.  So hopefully,
this will help them get found.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
654.  - You feel better.
- Light.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
655.  - You have the same perspective.
- I think more than anyone else.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
656.  It's important for you
to stick together.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
657.  We can be friends and supportive,
but it's not the same as for you.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
658.  - No, it's not the same. It's family.
- Exactly.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
659.  I've never been...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
660.  I've never been more grateful
to see someone that I loveCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
661.  as I was when I saw my nephew.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
662.  Do you think
you will ever be able to,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
663.  or want to,
give forgiveness towards Chris?Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
664.  Yes, I think I do, some day,
want to be able to forgive him. I do.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
665.  Because carrying around
the burden of hate...Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
666.  gets exhausting.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
667.  Everyone deserves forgiveness.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
668.  And everyone deserves mercy.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
669.  So I think that, within time,Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
670.  there will be a day
when I get on my kneesCopy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
671.  and I finally say it,
that I forgive him.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
672.  You never know,
it might be tomorrow.Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
673.  But I do know it's not today.Copy !req