1. Ho, Ho, Ho! Merry Christmas,
everybody. Welcome, welcome!Copy !req
2. All right, Santa.Copy !req
3. I want a Toxic Ooze battle-dome
with extra ooze refills.Copy !req
4. And I want a TX-1000 Cybernetic Gun
armed with Arctic sonar camo...Copy !req
5. Uh? Uh!Copy !req
6. Heh, heh, heh!Copy !req
7. Hey! What?Copy !req
8. How did you survive,
you kraut bastard?Copy !req
9. Ha, ha, ha!Copy !req
10. Let's sit down and talk this out.Copy !req
11. Nein!
I said, sit down!Copy !req
12. Heh, heh, heh!Copy !req
13. Ugh...Copy !req
14. Ha, ha, ha, ha!Copy !req
15. Danger 5 will hunt you down,
you motherfu...Copy !req
16. Urgh...Copy !req
17. Uh... Hello, everyone.Copy !req
18. I just wanted to take a momentCopy !req
19. to thank everyone for coming.Copy !req
20. Hoy.Copy !req
21. Er, especially...Copy !req
22. Mum and Dad who have
come all the wayCopy !req
23. from Greg's Peninsula
in Shark Australia.Copy !req
24. Brian, there's no thousand island
sauce for these prawns!Copy !req
25. Aw, would you just shush, Marie.
Shut the...Copy !req
26. Yes. Um... I love you too, Mum.Copy !req
27. I just want to go crabby.
Oh, la-de-da!Copy !req
28. Now...Copy !req
29. Claire...Copy !req
30. My wife.Copy !req
31. I couldn't find the words to tell you
how I feel with my real mouthCopy !req
32. so instead I'm going to use
my second mouth,Copy !req
33. my keyboard.Copy !req
34. Oh... that's beautiful.Copy !req
35. What are you doing in North Korea,
Mr Jackson?Copy !req
36. I'll never talk,
you commie son of a bitch!Copy !req
37. You will find I can be
very persuasive.Copy !req
38. No! No!Copy !req
39. No!Copy !req
40. No... Nooo!Copy !req
41. Wha... wha... Oh!Copy !req
42. Oh...Copy !req
43. Hi, Lorraine?Copy !req
44. Yeah, it is me again. Um...Copy !req
45. Yeah, can you gimme the usual?Copy !req
46. She was a stupid horse, girls.Copy !req
47. Pierre, you're the greatest
entrepreneur that's ever lived.Copy !req
48. You have 1000 hit singles,
1000 fashion linesCopy !req
49. and now 1000 night clubs.Copy !req
50. What drives you?Copy !req
51. McKenzie!
Dozo. Ha, ha, ha, ha!Copy !req
52. Hai!Copy !req
53. Take a copy of my cocktail book!Copy !req
54. Aghhhh!
Prawnsu! Prawnsu!Copy !req
55. Aw, Brian, the prawns have gone off!
Would you just shush, Marie!Copy !req
56. Oy, oy!Copy !req
57. Uww...Copy !req
58. Whoa!Copy !req
59. Phwoar!Copy !req
60. He, he, he!Copy !req
61. No, no...Copy !req
62. Urgh...Copy !req
63. Ah so! Ha, ha, ha, ha!Copy !req
64. Uh?Copy !req
65. He, he, he!Copy !req
66. No! No! No!Copy !req
67. No, no, Nooo!Copy !req
68. No!Copy !req
69. Slam dunk.Copy !req
70. No...Copy !req
71. Oh, look, Claire, a jaffle maker!Copy !req
72. Oh, and his and hers thousand island
dressing guns.Copy !req
73. Oh, thanks, Mum! Ooh!Copy !req
74. Claire, it's got a grenade!Copy !req
75. Colonel Chestbridge,Copy !req
76. former commander of World War II
super team Danger 5,Copy !req
77. has been added
to the permanent collectionCopy !req
78. at the London Natural History Museum.Copy !req
79. Remembered
for his military expertise...Copy !req
80. Excuse me,
is this a good motion picture?Copy !req
81. That's a good one, my friend.
And you'll also love the sequel.Copy !req
82. Climbo! Tantrum Tom!Copy !req
83. Claire, I can't find a movie with a
title that says what I want to say!Copy !req
84. Be cool, my friend!Copy !req
85. But I want to use
the home video code, Pierre!Copy !req
86. Whoa, McKenzie!Copy !req
87. I'm sorry, Tucker, my butler
gets a little hot-headed.Copy !req
88. McKenzie, have some movie corn.Copy !req
89. Hey, ah, where's Ilsa?
She didn't come here with you?Copy !req
90. Where the hell is she?Copy !req
91. Well, if she was here,
she would have shown us this.Copy !req
92. Oh right, yeah!Copy !req
93. Two key suspects have
emerged in the Chestbridge killings.Copy !req
94. Nazi war criminal Otto Skorzeny
and an unknown accomplice.Copy !req
95. Otto Skorzeny? I thought we killed
that piece of fish in Zanzibar.Copy !req
96. I thought so too, man,
but he's hiding in Argentina.Copy !req
97. Changed his name to Carlos Mendez.Copy !req
98. The Police Department
don't give a damn.Copy !req
99. They shoved so much red tape
up my ass, man.Copy !req
100. Maybe that gun nut killed Ilsa, too.
Ilsa can't die!Copy !req
101. Carlos killed the Colonel.
Carlos has to pay.Copy !req
102. You said it, Jackson!
Just like the good Ol' days.Copy !req
103. McKenzie, book us
five tickets to Buenos Aires!Copy !req
104. No. We can't go to Argentina,Copy !req
105. I've already booked
our honeymoon to Bali!Copy !req
106. Mm... Carlos!Copy !req
107. Mm...Copy !req
108. Ah, lemonade. Okay.Copy !req
109. Aah!Copy !req
110. Ah! Babes, boobs, blow...Copy !req
111. the perfect hiding hole for
a piece of fish like Carlos Mendez.Copy !req
112. 20, 40, 60...Copy !req
113. Let's shake this city down.
Yes, yes, yes!Copy !req
114. All right! Nice.
All right.Copy !req
115. Mendez could be anywhere.Copy !req
116. You're right.
Mm?Copy !req
117. The rainforest walk,
the kayak adventure...Copy !req
118. or at the couples retreat getting
a free organic banana leaf facial!Copy !req
119. Yes he'd definitely get
one of those.Copy !req
120. Those all sound like
honeymoon destinations,Copy !req
121. not hiding places
for an outlaw drug man.Copy !req
122. Nonsense!Copy !req
123. We know Carlos isn't hiding in this
complimentary margarine hexagon!Copy !req
124. I hope Ilsa's all right.Copy !req
125. Ilsa's always been
a bit of a custard tart.Copy !req
126. And you know what they say
about custard tarts?Copy !req
127. They can take care of themselves.Copy !req
128. Mendez definitely isn't here,
Tucker.Copy !req
129. Let's keep moving.Copy !req
130. But... he could be hiding
in this mango daiquiri!Copy !req
131. Claire?Copy !req
132. Everything's complimentary!Copy !req
133. I'll buy a dance if you tell me
where I can find Carlos Mendez.Copy !req
134. You don't have to pay for anything.
Just show me some skin.Copy !req
135. Okay!Copy !req
136. Don't do it, Pierre!
I know how this Mendez works.Copy !req
137. You show me where
that goddamn snorkel man is.Copy !req
138. I can see him! I can see him!
Whoa! Knock off the fish!Copy !req
139. That's not how you treat
such an exotic peach!Copy !req
140. I can't tell you anything! Mendez
is protected by President Peron!Copy !req
141. Peron? We go way back!
We're practically brothers!Copy !req
142. He'll give us a reception
fit for a king!Copy !req
143. Ahh... Ola... Como Te...Copy !req
144. Oh shit! Pierre! I thought
you were tight with these people!Copy !req
145. Shhh! You'll wake it!Copy !req
146. Pussy cat.Copy !req
147. Nooo!Copy !req
148. Jackson, shh!Copy !req
149. Lalo, is that you?Copy !req
150. Peron? Ola, my friend!Copy !req
151. Next time you should really
make an appointment.Copy !req
152. I tried to call, I called you!Copy !req
153. Bullshit!
No. They said wait.Copy !req
154. You did?
Yes.Copy !req
155. Why didn't you make
an appointment, Pierre?Copy !req
156. This isn't on the itinerary.Copy !req
157. We're supposed to be going
to the Museum of Cups and Saucers.Copy !req
158. The spoon exhibit closes at four.Copy !req
159. I just want to take a brief detour,
through this crime-infested slum.Copy !req
160. Are you suggesting
we spend our honeymoonCopy !req
161. nosing around alleys
looking for drug menCopy !req
162. instead of adhering to our mutually
approved timetable and...Copy !req
163. consummating our marriage?Copy !req
164. Tucker! Our commanding officer
was brutally murderedCopy !req
165. and your head is in your trousers?
I'm not a spy anymore, Claire!Copy !req
166. Those days are long gone.Copy !req
167. Now I'm a singer songwriter and
semi-published erotic novelist.Copy !req
168. But most of all, I'm your husband
and I want to enjoy our honeymoon!Copy !req
169. Give me my gun.Copy !req
170. I didn't pack the gun,
I needed room for sandwiches.Copy !req
171. New item to the itinerary, Tucker.Copy !req
172. Teaching these boys... Aah!Copy !req
173. Aww!Copy !req
174. Wow! Sieg...Copy !req
175. Heil!Copy !req
176. Sieg heil!Copy !req
177. Sieg heil!Copy !req
178. Thanks, ethnic local.Copy !req
179. Oh, that's a bonza idea!
Claire, did you hear that?Copy !req
180. Our own Sherpa!
What's your name, Sherpa?Copy !req
181. It can't be, Hitler's dead.Copy !req
182. Yes, and Hitler never wore hats.Copy !req
183. Just like in the brochure!Copy !req
184. Yeah! Can you teach me
how to communicate with cats?Copy !req
185. No, no, no.Copy !req
186. Pierre, it's the ants.
Yes, yes, yes...Copy !req
187. It's the ants. Of all things...Copy !req
188. Naughty Fawzia!
Hey! How you doing?Copy !req
189. Sorry about that little
misunderstanding before, Lalo.Copy !req
190. Your friend did well
to survive the ants.Copy !req
191. He's both strong and tough.
Like this table.Copy !req
192. Peron, I need you
to pull some shoelaces for me.Copy !req
193. We're looking for a man
called Carlos Mendez.Copy !req
194. Let's have a drink, uh? I think this
goes well with rolled kiwi fruit.Copy !req
195. I think you taught me this one, Lalo.
Yes, I taught you this one.Copy !req
196. Aah!Copy !req
197. He's got Ilsa!
Goddamit, this guy's a communist!Copy !req
198. He's trying to give us a commo-job.
Whoa! Put the gun down, my friend!Copy !req
199. Ilsa isn't here.
She's right there!Copy !req
200. That's just my daughter Stina!Copy !req
201. Too much party in my nose, Papi!
It's OK, baby.Copy !req
202. Hey!Copy !req
203. Where's Carlos!
I was going to tell you.Copy !req
204. But given the circumstances,
I change my mind!Copy !req
205. Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
What did you do that for?Copy !req
206. The information is inside his head.
We can find it ourselves!Copy !req
207. Are you serious?Copy !req
208. What? Mendez was here
the whole time!Copy !req
209. Shit!
Fish!Copy !req
210. This Cat Circus is as remarkable
as a fried kangaroo egg!Copy !req
211. Luxury super yacht!Copy !req
212. Claire, did you hear that?Copy !req
213. Count us in. One, two, three!Copy !req
214. Tucker, we need to be looking
for Mendez.Copy !req
215. Plus I think Father Hitler
is a confidence man.Copy !req
216. Yes! Of course he is.Copy !req
217. He's making me confident.
And comfortable.Copy !req
218. They should call him
a comfortable man.Copy !req
219. We keep drifting off
the timetable.Copy !req
220. I made these margarine sandwiches...Copy !req
221. Oh! He, he...Copy !req
222. Well... of course I have.Copy !req
223. Six or seven times today alone.
Yeah.Copy !req
224. It hurts.
But I'm a man. Yeah.Copy !req
225. We did it.
Oh, we've done it, yeah.Copy !req
226. It's done.Copy !req
227. Nooo!Copy !req
228. Ilsa, my love.
Still working on your tan?Copy !req
229. I like the cold.
Keeps a man honest.Copy !req
230. Now what do you have for me,
potato hips?Copy !req
231. Go to American
and intercept Hitler's next move.Copy !req
232. Your work in Argentina is complete.Copy !req
233. Destroy Hitler's luxury super yacht
with this Bombushka.Copy !req
234. Ha, ha, ha, ha.Copy !req
235. Go, go.Copy !req
236. Jackson!Copy !req
237. Ha, ha, ha, ha!Copy !req
238. Argh!Copy !req
239. Why did you kill the Colonel,
Mendez?Copy !req
240. No! No, no, no, no!Copy !req
241. C'mon, my friend!
We can talk about this!Copy !req
242. Take a look at my latest single!
Please?Copy !req
243. Mmm...Copy !req
244. Aah...Copy !req
245. Just like old times, my friend.Copy !req
246. Aaah!Copy !req
247. I feel like chattin'!Copy !req
248. Who wants to chat?Copy !req
249. You love to chat?
Goldie loves to chat!Copy !req
250. Chat! Chat! Chat! Chat!
Chat! Chat! Chat! Chat!Copy !req
251. How do you know Ilsa?Copy !req
252. Do I like what I see?
Do you like what you see?Copy !req
253. Aargh!Copy !req
254. Mm! I've never had
Argentinian food before.Copy !req
255. Asparagus? More like,
I-don't-know-what-that-is-agus.Copy !req
256. And then she said, "Am I a horse?
Then why do you keep riding me?".Copy !req
257. But she was a horse! Stupid horse.Copy !req
258. What's going on, Ilsa?
Why are you on this boat?Copy !req
259. I haven't seen you in an eternity.Copy !req
260. A dancer? Wow!Copy !req
261. Tucker, look!Copy !req
262. Hey!Copy !req
263. Darn it, I only brought enough
coupons for the two of us.Copy !req
264. Ilsa! You're alive!Copy !req
265. What? Where have you been?
She's a dancer. So amazing!Copy !req
266. Glad to see you're not dead, Ilsa.Copy !req
267. Ah, here he is!Copy !req
268. Everyone, I'd like you to meet
our tour guide, Father Hitler!Copy !req
269. Hitler! I knew it!
Hitler DOES wear hats! Doh!Copy !req
270. He's a master of disguise, Tucker.
Gesu Cristo.Copy !req
271. How could you have forgotten?
Here, Claire, take this.Copy !req
272. What? What is he talking about?Copy !req
273. Yeah, I may have told him
something. Just, you know, a fib.Copy !req
274. Fib, fib, fib.
No time for your nonsense, Tucker.Copy !req
275. Where the hell are you going?Copy !req
276. But we gotta get Hitler!Copy !req
277. Oh yeah, a dancer. So amazing!Copy !req
278. Wow.Copy !req
279. Peek-a-boo.Copy !req
280. Barleys. Eh!Copy !req
281. No windows for you to jump out of
this time, Hitler.Copy !req
282. How observant, Cl...Copy !req
283. He, he, he, he he!Copy !req
284. Ha, ha, ha!Copy !req
285. Aaah!Copy !req
286. I'll kill him, Claire...Copy !req
287. I promise.Copy !req
288. I know you're sad, my friend, but...Copy !req
289. please don't carry
that thing around!Copy !req
290. You'll catch some sort
of dead person's disease.Copy !req
291. New from Tamico!Copy !req
292. It's the Adolf Hitler Action Set!Copy !req
293. The real-sound Hitler moustacheCopy !req
294. has the commanding voice
you need to take over the world.Copy !req
295. I am Hitler.
Cower before me, underling.Copy !req
296. And with the Super Uzi machine gun,
you're the boss of bedtime.Copy !req
297. What the hell are you wearing?
Did you buy him that?Copy !req
298. No! Go to bed, Billy!
Nein!Copy !req
299. The Adolf Hitler talking moustache,
Super Uzi, cool sunglasses,Copy !req
300. tactical hairdo and bullet-proof
trench coat, each sold separately.Copy !req
301. From Tamico.Copy !req
302. I think this is the kind of girl
Hitler would be after.Copy !req
303. Holly de Palma?
Here.Copy !req
304. Johnny Hitler?
Heil.Copy !req
305. Keep your eyes off my date,
Lisa Lespez.Copy !req