Curb Your Enthusiasm 7x4

1. LET ME, UH— A LITTLE TIP, OKAY?

2. - MM-HMM. A LITTLE TRAVELING TIP.

3. TRY NOT TO WEAR SHORTS.

4. IT'S NOT ALL THAT ATTRACTIVE TO LOOK AT FOR FIVE HOURS.

5. - ARE YOU KIDDING? - HONESTLY. NO, I'M NOT.

6. FLIGHT WHEN I TRAVEL... - REALLY?

7. - ...'CAUSE IT'S VERY COMFORTABLE. - YES. YEAH.

8. THESE PLANES, IF YOU NOTICE, GET VERY HOT.

9. - AH. YES, THEY DO. - I'M SORRY, I DIDN'T SEE

10. I'M SITTING NEXT TO WHAT I SHOULD WEAR.

11. I'M COMFORTABLE IN PAJAMAS, BUT I DON'T WEAR PAJAMAS ON A PLANE.

12. I LIKE TO SING. I LIKE TO WHISTLE.

13. THE BONGOS ON MY LEG.

14. TO IMITATE HORSES... - OKAY.

15. - ... BUT I DON'T DO IT, OKAY? - ALL RIGHT.

16. - BECAUSE THERE'S SOMEBODY SITTING NEXT TO ME. - YEAH, OKAY. OKAY.

17. WOW, YOU'RE VERY UPTIGHT, DUDE. VERY UPTIGHT.

18. - UPTIGHT? I DON'T THINK IT'S "UPTIGHT." - IT'S JUST SHORTS, MAN.

19. - YOU'VE NEVER SEEN A MAN'S LEGS? - YEAH, THEY'RE GROTESQUE.

20. A WOMAN'S IN A SKIRT?

21. TO HER IF A WOMAN'S IN A SKIRT?

22. - IF THEY WERE HAIRY. - OKAY.

23. FOR A HOT TOWEL?

24. SHE MUST'VE PUT IT IN THE MICROWAVE.

25. DON'T YOU THINK? I MEAN, LIKE THIS IS YOUR LIFE?

26. - HUH. - ONLY ME. ONLY ME THIS HAPPENS TO.

27. I BET YOU I COULD SUE 'EM. DON'T YOU THINK?

28. DO I HAVE A CASE? TELL ME.

29. TESTIFY FOR ME? - NO.

30. - YOU WOULDN'T TESTIFY? - NO, I WOULDN'T.

31. AND TROUBLING.

32. YEAH, IT WOULD BE HARD TO FIND A DOCTOR WHO, IN GOOD CONSCIENCE,

33. FOR THAT BURN.

34. OKAY. I'LL DROP IT.

35. - FORGET ABOUT IT. - OKAY. BY THE WAY,

36. IN THE WAITING ROOM.

37. - OH. - THE OPERA? FABULOUS.

38. I'M GLAD YOU LIKE IT.

39. CALLED MATTEO'S.

40. - FROM VARIOUS ITALIAN OPERAS. - NO KIDDING?

41. - YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH. - WHAT A FABULOUS IDEA.

42. FOR MY FRIENDS.

43. I'LL BET YOU— THAT WOULD BE A GOOD GIFT, WOULD IT NOT?

44. - IT'D BE A GREAT GIFT. TO THIS RESTAURANT?

45. ABSOLUTELY. YEAH. DO IT.

46. - ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU. THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING. - YOU'RE WELCOME.

47. - I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU, YOU KNOW. - NO PROBLEM.

48. - WELL, SHOULD I COME BACK? - NO, YOU DON'T NEED TO COME BACK.

49. IT'LL BE HEALED BEFORE YOU WALK OUT THE DOOR.

50. OKAY.

51. YOU KNOW WHAT?

52. I WAS JUST THINKING.

53. I'D LOVE TO GET

54. WITH THE HAND. WHO KNOWS? SOMETHING COMES UP,

55. - IT'S NICE TO HAVE. - I DON'T GIVE OUT MY HOME PHONE NUMBER.

56. YOU KNOW, I UNDERSTAND ALL THAT,

57. FEEL BETTER, YOU KNOW.

58. MORE SECURE.

59. NOTHING'S GONNA HAPPEN. I'M NEVER GONNA CALL.

60. YOU KNOW, WHAT ARE HAPPENING? ZERO.

61. WELL, IF ANYTHING HAPPENED,

62. - AND THEY'LL CONTACT ME. - YEAH, THEN I HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE MIDDLEMAN,

63. SORT OF, AND MAYBE THE SERVICE ISN'T THERE.

64. TO YOU AND NOT ME?

65. - I'M YOUR PATIENT. - YOU HAVE A PROBLEM.

66. YOU MAKE THE CALL. THEY CALL ME,

67. THEN I RESPOND TO YOU.

68. IT WORKS LIKE A CHARM! IT WORKS EVERY TIME!

69. OF HAVING MY DOCTOR'S NUMBER IN MY WALLET.

70. I DON'T WANT TO BE IN YOUR WALLET.

71. IN MY WALLET.

72. - WHAT DO YOU THINK? - I'LL MAKE AN EXCEPTION

73. OF GETTING ON WITH MY DAY.

74. - FANTASTIC. THANKS SO MUCH. - ALL RIGHT.

75. AND I DON'T WANT YOU AT HOME, ALL RIGHT?

76. BUT IF IT'LL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER,

77. - ON THE WAY OUT. - OKAY.

78. - KEEP IT DRY... - KEEP IT DRY.

79. AND DON'T CALL.

80. - HELLO. - Larry: REALLY?

81. - WOW. - WOW.

82. JEEZ. MARY JANE.

83. - HEY. HI. - HI. HI.

84. - HI. - HOW ARE YOU?

85. - IT'S BEEN AWHILE. - UH, YEAH.

86. - WELL, YOU LOOK GOOD. - SO DO YOU.

87. THANK YOU. HOW ARE THINGS?

88. I JUST CAME FROM THE DOCTOR. I'VE GOT TWO MONTHS TO LIVE.

89. - IT'S TERRIBLE. - NOT VERY FUNNY.

90. YEAH, I'M TRYING TO GET WOMEN TO TAKE PITY ON ME,

91. SO THEY'LL SLEEP WITH ME, YOU KNOW. THAT'S ALL.

92. EVERYBODY THAT.

93. - HMM. - SO, UM,

94. WHAT'S YOUR SOCIAL SITUATION?

95. - ARE YOU MARRIED? - GOD NO.

96. WITH ME THOUGH.

97. YOU'RE STILL— YOU'RE STILL HAVING NIGHTMARES ABOUT THAT?

98. YOU— OH, LARRY, YOU'RE THE SAME!

99. YOU MADE A MISTAKE.

100. WE SHOULD GO OUT. AND CATCH UP.

101. - YOU KNOW, THAT WOULD BE FANTASTIC. - YEAH?

102. - YEAH, LET'S DO THAT. - WHAT ABOUT TONIGHT?

103. TONIGHT I'M GOING TO TED DANSON'S ANNIVERSARY PARTY.

104. OH, YEAH. YEAH, MY FRIEND CHRISTIAN SLATER'S GONNA BE THERE.

105. - CHRISTIAN SLATER? - YEAH.

106. - HE'S A FRIEND OF YOURS? - YEAH, TELL HIM I SAID HI.

107. UH, NO, BUT I'LL— I'LL SEE HIM.

108. - UM, HOW ABOUT TOMORROW? - OKAY.

109. - WE'RE GONNA HAVE A DATE? - YEAH.

110. MY NUMBER? - I DO.

111. - WHAT DO YOU THINK, I THREW AWAY YOUR NUMBER?

112. I'VE GOT THE NUMBER OF EVERY WOMAN I'VE EVER GONE OUT WITH IN MY LIFE.

113. BELIEVE ME. I'M GONNA SEE YOU TOMORROW.

114. - YEAH. - I'VE CHANGED.

115. - BYE. - BYE.

116. MOZZARELLA? NAH.

117. - HEY. - HI.

118. MARY JANE PORTER?

119. ONE OF MY FAVORITES.

120. - I RAN INTO HER TODAY. - HOW'S SHE LOOK?

121. - FANTASTIC. - REALLY?

122. - OH MY GOD, SHE'S A DOLL. - OH GOD.

123. - YOU KNOW? - YEAH. WHY'D SHE GO OUT WITH YOU?

124. I DON'T KNOW WHY SHE WENT OUT WITH ME.

125. I DON'T KNOW. THAT'S A GOOD QUESTION.

126. OF OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE. - WAY OUT OF MY LEAGUE.

127. - HUGE TIME. - WELL, THAT'S WHY SHE GOT RID OF ME.

128. - YEAH. REALLY? - WELL, I WAS SO DESPERATE.

129. THE INSECURITY.

130. - THEY PICK UP ON IT. - INSTANTLY.

131. - I'M SEEING HER TOMORROW NIGHT. - REALLY?

132. YEAH. SHE ASKED ME.

133. MAYBE SHE'S GOT THE DESPERATION THIS TIME.

134. - HOPEFULLY. - HOPEFULLY.

135. IT'S A LOT EASIER DESPERATION THAN MINE.

136. - LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION. SEXUALLY... - YEAH. YEAH.

137. CAN I PICK UP WHERE I LEFT OFF WITH HER?

138. ABSOLUTELY. YOU PUT IN YOUR TIME.

139. I MEAN, IT'S LIKE 15 YEARS LATER, BUT...

140. EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE BEFORE COUNTS.

141. YES. I DON'T KNOW...

142. IN TERMS OF UNHOOKING BRAS, I'M REALLY GONNA BE IN TROUBLE.

143. - LOOK AT THIS? - WELL, WHY DON'T YOU USE YOUR RIGHT HAND?

144. I'M— I'M A LEFTY UNHOOKER. I CAN'T UNHOOK RIGHTY.

145. IT'S FROM THE CAR, I THINK, WHEN YOU PARK.

146. - RIGHT. - YOU'RE MAKING OUT IN THE DRIVER'S SEAT,

147. YOU LEAN OVER, IT'S YOUR LEFT HAND THAT'S DOING THE UNHOOKING.

148. YOU GET USED TO THE LEFT. IT'S LIKE THE ONE THING

149. IF YOU'RE A RIGHTY LEFT HAND WITH SKILL.

150. - THAT'S TRUE. - SO WHAT'S GOING ON WITH CHERYL?

151. AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

152. MEG RYAN SITUATION?

153. OH, IT'S GONNA— IT'S GONNA BE ABOUT JERRY.

154. - YEAH. - YOU KNOW, I'VE JUST

155. TO USE CHERYL, 'CAUSE IF I CAST HER...

156. I'LL HAVE A SHOT.

157. - I THINK IT'S A GREAT PLAN. - IN THE MEANTIME,

158. I'M ALLOWED TO HAVE SOME FUN, RIGHT?

159. PLEASE! WHY NOT?

160. ASKING YOU.

161. HEY, WHAT DID YOU GET TED AND MARY?

162. THE GIFTS. NO IDEA.

163. - HELLO! - Ted: SERIOUSLY, THOUGH—

164. - LAR! I DIDN'T SEE YOU COME IN. - HEY!

165. - HEY, BUDDY. THAT'S SWEET OF YOU. - HEY, CONGRATULATIONS.

166. - THANK YOU, THANK YOU. - AND LOOK WHAT I GOT.

167. DEE-DAH! WHAT IS THAT?

168. - IT'S A PRESENT. - OH MY GOD.

169. - HO! LARRY. - LAR!

170. - WHAT? - OH MY GOD.

171. A $300 GIFT CERTIFICATE TO MATTEO'S RESTAURANT.

172. HAVE YOU BEEN THERE? IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE GREAT.

173. GIVE THAT MUCH?

174. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THAT.

175. WHAT? WHY ARE YOU SO SURPRISED?

176. NO, IT'S JUST, YOU KNOW, THE LAST—

177. - WHAT WAS THE LAST GIFT? - Both: "THE FREAK BOOK."

178. - "THE FREAK BOOK." - THAT WAS A GOOD GIFT,

179. - AND IT WAS EXPENSIVE TOO. - THIS IS GREAT. I SHOULDN'T HAVE EVEN BROUGHT THAT UP.

180. - I'M SORRY. THIS IS GREAT. - NO, IT'S REALLY NICE.

181. - THANK YOU. THANK YOU. OF YOU, BUDDY.

182. - THANK YOU. - OH, OKAY. WELL, YOU'RE WELCOME.

183. IS IT A LOT YOU'VE BEEN GETTING?

184. - NO. - NO NO NO.

185. - IT'S JUST—

186. - IT'S JUST THAT— - IT'S JUST— IT'S—

187. - NO, IT'S A GREAT GIFT. THANK YOU. - THANK YOU.

188. THANK YOU. LET ME— I'VE GOTTA CATCH UP WITH—

189. OF COURSE. THE HOST HAS TO CIRCULATE.

190. - YOU CIRCULATE TOO, LAR. - YEAH, WELL, I— I KNOW. YOU'RE THE BIG STARS,

191. - THE HOSTS OF THE PARTY. - THERE'S A LOT OF NICE WOMEN HERE.

192. TO THE HOSTS OF COURSE.

193. I UNDERSTAND. "OH, I'M THE HOST.

194. HELLO, I'M THE HOST OF THE PARTY."

195. - HEY. - HEY, L.D. HOW ARE YOU, MAN?

196. GOOD. YOU KNOW, OF YOURS TODAY.

197. - WHO'S THAT? - MARY— MARY JANE PORTER.

198. - MMM! I LOVE HER. SHE'S GREAT. - MMM.

199. JESUS CHRIST.

200. - WHAT? - YOU'RE REALLY GOING TO TOWN ON THAT CAVIAR.

201. IT'S THE BEST CAVIAR THEY COULD POSSIBLY GET.

202. IT'S UNBELIEVABLE. WHAT DO YOU THINK I'M GONNA DO, PASS THIS UP?

203. I THINK YOU'RE GOING A LITTLE BIT. NO?

204. - MY ALLOTMENT? - YOU KNOW,

205. WE'RE EACH ENTITLED

206. HAVE A LITTLE BIT TOO.

207. - UMM. YOU'RE GOING OVER.

208. JUST AN OBSERVATION. NOT A BIG DEAL.

209. - OKAY. I'M OBSERVING.

210. IT'S GOOD THAT YOU'RE HERE TO PATROL THE HORS D'OEUVRES AREA.

211. - YEAH. - OKAY.

212. IN THIS SOCIETY.

213. IF I'M TALKING THEIR FRIEND HAS CANCER,

214. I GO "OH. OH. OH."

215. EVEN THOUGH I DON'T KNOW THE PERSON, I'LL GO "OH."

216. YOU KNOW, IT'S AN UNWRITTEN LAW.

217. LIKE THAT.

218. - MMM. OKAY. - IT'S A NICE THING TO DO.

219. YOU TAKE A LITTLE BIT,

220. FOR 20 MINUTES, SEE WHAT KIND OF ACTION THERE IS.

221. - OH. - IF NOBODY'S TAKING ANY,

222. A LITTLE BIT MORE, STEP AWAY AGAIN.

223. - SO FORTH AND SO ON. - OKAY, LOOK.

224. AND I'M GONNA STEP AWAY THEN.

225. - WOW. - ENJOY THE PARTY.

226. - OKAY. ALL RIGHT. - ALWAYS GOOD TO SEE YOU.

227. LARRY, DID YOU EAT ALL THAT CAVIAR?

228. - HUH? NO. - WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?

229. I MEAN, EVERYBODY KNOWS YOU TAKE A LITTLE, RIGHT?

230. - HEY, IT WASN'T ME. - THEN WHO WAS IT?

231. EATING GOBFULS OF IT.

232. - I HATE THAT. - I COULDN'T EVEN LOOK AT IT.

233. THAT'S...

234. - SO INCONSIDERATE, NO? - IT'S AN UNWRITTEN RULE.

235. - UNWRITTEN RULE, EXACTLY.

236. CAN I HAVE EVERYONE'S ATTENTION, PLEASE?

237. TED AND MARY,

238. TO AN INCREDIBLE COUPLE.

239. WE DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO GET YOU.

240. EVERYTHING.

241. WE'RE NOT GONNA GET YOU A TOASTER OR A BLENDER,

242. TALENTED DAUGHTER SAMMI,

243. AS OUR GIFT TO YOU, IS GONNA SING A SPECIAL SONG.

244. - OH, THAT'S SO SWEET. - Susie: SO LET'S HAVE A NICE ROUND OF APPLAUSE.

245. - THAT'S A GIFT? ARE YOU KIDDING? - Susie: SAMMI IS GONNA SING.

246. - LET'S HEAR IT FOR SAMMI. - HOW IS THAT A GIFT?

247. OH MY GOD.

248. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

249. ARE YOU KIDDING?

250. IT'S THE WORST THING I'VE EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE.

251. ALL RIGHT. OKAY.

252. ALL RIGHT. OKAY. THAT'S GOOD. THAT'S GOOD.

253. - VERY GOOD, VERY GOOD! OKAY, THAT WAS WONDERFUL. - WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

254. - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - VERY GOOD TALENT.

255. - I'M NOT— I'M NOT DONE. - NO NO NO NO, THAT WAS TERRIFIC.

256. NO NO, SHE'S NOT DONE. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

257. THAT WAS VERY GOOD. VERY GOOD.

258. WHY ARE YOU INTERRUPTING HER, LARRY?

259. WHY ARE YOU— SHE WAS SINGING THE SONG.

260. - WHAT WERE YOU DOING? - WHAT? THE SONG'S OVER.

261. NO, THE SONG WAS NOT OVER. YOU KNOW

262. - AND YOU CUT HER OFF! - I THOUGHT THE SONG WAS OVER.

263. YOU RUINED THE WHOLE GIFT! THAT WAS OUR GIFT, FOR GOD'S SAKE!

264. - OH, I THOUGHT THE SONG WAS OVER. - SAMMI, THAT WAS GREAT.

265. LET'S GIVE HER A NICE ROUND OF APPLAUSE. THAT WAS GOOD.

266. THAT WAS GOOD. YEAH.

267. I'LL TELL YOU— THAT'S A TALENTED KID.

268. HEY! REAL NICE. REAL NICE.

269. COME— I MEAN, ABOUT THE CAVIAR.

270. THANKS. THANKS A LOT. THANK YOU.

271. WHAT? WHAT DID SHE SAY?

272. TO TOO MUCH CAVIAR.

273. WELL, SHE NOTICED

274. WHO ATE IT.

275. WHAT? WHAT? WAS I SUPPOSED TO LIE?

276. TOO MUCH CAVIAR! - OH, PLEASE. ARE YOU KIDDING?

277. - WHO ARE YOU? LIKE IT WAS POTATO CHIPS!

278. IT'S THERE TO BE EATEN, YOU KNOW?

279. - NOT BY ONE PERSON! ON THE TABLE.

280. YOUR DINNER. - OH GOD.

281. SMILE.

282. HEY, MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. HOW ABOUT THAT?

283. "SMILE."

284. HELLO.

285. - Larry: Fat boy! - WHAT? HELLO?

286. - Jeff? - UMM, NO.

287. - NO, THERE'S NO JEFF HERE. - IS THIS DR. MORRISON?

288. UH, YEAH, IT IS. IT IS. WHO'S THIS?

289. OH MY GOD! IT'S LARRY DAVID!

290. Your patient Larry David.

291. AND WASN'T IT JUST

292. TO CALL HERE?

293. NO, I WASN'T CALLING YOU.

294. YOURS BY ACCIDENT.

295. ASKING YOU NOT TO CALL ME.

296. NO NO, I DIDN'T CALL.

297. HOW CAN YOU SAY YOU DIDN'T CALL?

298. - YOU DID CALL. - I DIDN'T CALL PURPOSEFULLY.

299. - IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. STILL A CALL.

300. TECHNICALLY, I CALLED, BUT—

301. LOOK. I'M IN THE OTHER ROOM

302. I'M WORKING. I HAD TO WALK IN HERE.

303. THE PHONE.

304. NOW I'M TALKING TO YOU. THAT'S A CALL.

305. IT'S A WRONG NUMBER.

306. YOU KNOW, I DON'T HAVE AN HOURGLASS SET UP HERE,

307. BUT IT'S

308. I'VE EVER HAD IN MY LIFE.

309. I have things to do, Mr. David.

310. - REALLY? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - I'm changing light bulbs

311. THE CAT'S LITTER BOX.

312. WHAT DO YOU DO AT HOME?

313. DON'T ASK ME WHAT I DO AT HOME.

314. ALL RIGHT. I'M GONNA HANG UP THEN.

315. You don't have to tell me everything you're doing. Just hang up.

316. Okay. The next time you hear from me

317. OF AN EMERGENCY,

318. YOU DON'T HEAR FROM ME.

319. MY SERVICE NUMBER.

320. Call them, ask about their day.

321. DON'T BOTHER ME.

322. - HMM. - So did you hang up yet?

323. NOT YET. SHOULD I HANG UP NOW?

324. YES, I'M GOING TO HANG UP NOW.

325. THAT I'M GOING TO THE RESTAURANT TONIGHT?

326. GOODBYE.

327. BY THE WAY, I'M NOT THAT IMPRESSED WITH THE FOOD.

328. IT'S GOOD.

329. NO, I'M HAVING WITH THIS OSSO BUCO.

330. I CAN'T BELIEVE DR. MORRISON RECOMMENDED IT. IT'S TERRIBLE.

331. - YOU DON'T LIKE FOOD. - WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, I DON'T LIKE FOOD?

332. YOU DON'T LIKE FOOD. EVERY TIME WE'VE GONE OUT,

333. - YOU'RE LIKE "I DON'T LIKE THIS FOOD." - NO, I DIDN'T LIKE YOUR FOOD.

334. - THAT'S WHAT— - YOU DIDN'T LIKE MY FOOD?

335. YOUR FOOD— COME ON, IN THE WORLD.

336. - OH, STOP IT. - YOU KNOW THAT. "STOP IT."

337. THAT THINKS THAT.

338. I THINK YOU'RE NOT A GOOD... EATER.

339. - REALLY? YOU THINK I'M— - YEAH, YOU'RE NOT A GOOD EATER.

340. ANYWAY, I'D BETTER SHUT UP, BECAUSE I'M PLANNING ON—

341. I'M PLANNING

342. CRITICIZING YOUR FOOD.

343. - YOU'RE RIGHT. - YEAH.

344. A BIG BIG MOVE.

345. - IS THAT WHAT THIS IS? - YEAH, EXACTLY.

346. - A BIG STORM WARNING? - I'M BABE RUTH CALLING THE SHOT.

347. ALL RIGHT. OH, THERE'S YOUR FRIEND TED DANSON.

348. TED DANSON?

349. NO, HE'S OVER THERE.

350. - Mary Jane: IS THAT WEIRD? - IT WAS GREAT.

351. YEAH, IT'S REALLY WEIRD.

352. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

353. - Ted: YOU'RE— YOU'RE KIDDING. - TO THE VINEYARD?

354. - YEAH. - YEAH, YOU COULD. YOU COULD.

355. - HEY, LARRY. - Mary: HI.

356. - HI, LAR. - HEY, BUDDY.

357. - ARE YOU HAVING A NICE TIME? - YES, THANK YOU SO MUCH.

358. - THANK YOU, BUDDY. - I FIND IT A LITTLE ODD,

359. FRANKLY,

360. $300 GIFT CERTIFICATE TO THE RESTAURANT...

361. TO TAKE THEM AND NOT ME.

362. BUT IF WE TOOK YOU,

363. WOULDN'T THAT BE YOU GIVING A GIFT TO YOURSELF?

364. - NO, NOT REALLY.

365. NO, I GAVE YOU A GIFT

366. "HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT? WHY DON'T YOU COME WITH US?"

367. ON THE GIFT CERTIFICATE,

368. - "$300 PLUS TAKE ME"? - NO. NO,

369. BUT DON'T YOU FEEL

370. - THAT YOU'RE EATING DINNER UNDER— IT'S MY MONEY? - NOT AT ALL.

371. - I PAID FOR YOUR GIFT. - WHAT, HAVE YOU GOT A BEEF WITH ME NOW?

372. - YEAH? - I'VE GOT A SIDE BEEF WITH YOU.

373. - I'VE GOT A BEEF WITH HIM. - YOU KNOW WHAT?

374. - WE'VE HAD A REALLY NICE FUN NIGHT... - DO ME A FAVOR.

375. WHICH IS MORE THAN WE WOULD'VE HAD IF WE'D BROUGHT YOU.

376. DON'T GET US A GIFT. NO MORE GIFTS.

377. A GIFT, OKAY?

378. I DIDN'T HAVE MY DAUGHTER GO UP AND SING A SONG.

379. THAT MEAN, LARRY? - OH, COME ON NOW.

380. - IS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE A GIFT? - YES, THAT WAS A GIFT FROM THE HEART.

381. - THAT IS NOT A GIFT. - AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

382. TO SHUT HER UP.

383. - THAT WAS MEAN. THAT WAS CRUEL. - IT WAS HORRIBLE.

384. - IT WAS OVER THE LINE. THE TOILET NOW.

385. I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT, TO DO WITH HER.

386. I JUST— I CAN'T OF THE HUMAN VOICE.

387. - YOU CAN'T STAND THE SOUND OF THE HUMAN VOICE? - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

388. IN THE HOUSE ALL THE TIME. I COULDN'T TAKE IT.

389. AND TO THIS DAY,

390. - YOU'RE FULL OF IT. - Ted: BULLSHIT. BULLSHIT.

391. IT'S BULLSHIT. HE'S MAKING IT UP.

392. I'M NOT MAKING IT UP. BE THE TRUTH.

393. - Mary: I'VE NEVER HEARD THIS ABOUT YOU, EVER. - Ted: YEAH.

394. I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT.

395. HEY HEY HEY. HEY HEY.

396. THAT'S OKAY. WE'VE GOT IT. WE'VE GOT IT.

397. WE'VE GOT IT. WE'RE GOOD. HEY.

398. WE'RE GOOD. WE'RE GOOD.

399. PIPE IT DOWN. WE'RE GOOD. WE'RE GOOD.

400. THAT'S OKAY. LOCK IT UP. LOCK IT UP. WE'RE GOOD.

401. VERY GOOD. IT WAS VERY GOOD.

402. - HONESTLY. VERY GOOD. YEAH.

403. YEAH, WE'RE— WE'RE EATING NOW.

404. WE'RE EATING. WE CAN'T LISTEN NOW.

405. COME ON. RIGHT, PEOPLE?

406. HUH? WHILE WE'RE EATING? WE DON'T—

407. WE DON'T NEED THAT. COME ON.

408. DAMN IT.

409. HEY, WOULD YOU MIND SWITCHING SIDES?

410. SWITCH SI— SIDES? UH, OKAY.

411. - OKAY. THAT SIDE.

412. - OH. ALL RIGHT. - YEAH.

413. OH, HERE, YOU— YOU GO.

414. - THANKS. - BETTER?

415. - MUCH BETTER. - ALL GOOD?

416. YOU'RE SO AGREEABLE. ABOUT YOU.

417. AREN'T I? THANKS.

418. WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

419. OH, DAMN IT.

420. SOME PIE? - PIE?

421. OH MY GOD, IT'S DELICIOUS.

422. - MMM. - OH.

423. - THIS IS SO GOOD. - REALLY?

424. I MADE IT. DO YOU WANT SOME?

425. - YOU MADE IT? - YEAH, I TOOK A DESSERT CLASS.

426. AND I'M NOT KIDDING.

427. ALL RIGHT, I'LL TRY IT.

428. - HAVE IT. IT'S GOOD. HONESTLY. - OKAY, FINE.

429. - ALL RIGHT. - SORRY.

430. WHAT IS IT? WHAT KIND?

431. OH, SHIT.

432. - IT'S MY BOYFRIEND. - YOU'VE GOT TO BE QUIET.

433. YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU HAD A BOYFRIEND.

434. HELLO? WHAT'S GOING ON?

435. UH— OH, NOTHING.

436. YOU KNOW, I WAS JUST HANGING OUT,

437. ANYTHING ACTUALLY. - AH!

438. - OH, WOW! WOW! - OH! OH!

439. OH, GOD. NO NO, I'M WATCHING TV.

440. IT'S LIKE ON THE DISCOVERY CHANNEL.

441. WHY DON'T WE TALK ABOUT IT TOMORROW?

442. OH. OH, YOU ARE.

443. THEN I'LL— I'LL SEE YOU IN A MINUTE. OKAY. BYE.

444. FUCK.

445. - YOU'VE GOTTA GO. - WHAT?

446. MY BOYFRIEND'S COMING OVER.

447. YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU HAD A BOYFRIEND.

448. IT DIDN'T COME UP. YOU DIDN'T ASK ME.

449. WELL, IT SHOULD'VE COME UP. NO?

450. LISTEN. YOU'VE GOTTA GO

451. 'CAUSE THIS WILL SUCK— SERIOUSLY— FOR ME.

452. - DO YOU LIKE HIM? - LARRY, YOU'VE GOT TO GO.

453. I— I CAN'T GET INTO THIS NOW.

454. - DID I LEAVE ANYTHING HERE? - HELLO? NO, YOU'RE FINE.

455. YOU'VE GOT TO GO. LARRY, PLEASE.

456. THIS SITUATION.

457. YEAH, I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE SITUATION.

458. HE WILL KILL ME. HE WILL KILL YOU. WE CAN TALK ABOUT IT LATER.

459. - KILL ME? IS HE A BIG GUY? - YOU DON'T WANT TO FIND OUT.

460. I'M NOT KIDDING. THE FOOD WAS JUST AWFUL.

461. TERRIBLE. HONESTLY, I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE YOU RECOMMENDED THAT.

462. WELL, I LIKED THE OSSO BUCO.

463. IT DIDN'T TASTE LIKE OSSO BUCO TO ME. IT WAS BAD OSSO BUCO.

464. IT'D BE HARD OSSO BUCO THAN THAT.

465. AH. ANYWAY, I'M SORRY ABOUT THE CALL AGAIN.

466. IT WAS A COMPLETE ACCIDENT.

467. LIKE THAT? MY SERVICE.

468. - REALLY? INTERESTING. - THAT'S RIGHT.

469. - PLEASE DON'T CALL AGAIN. - OKAY, BUT LIKE I SAID,

470. IT WAS A WRONG NUMBER. TO CALL YOU.

471. WELL, PERHAPS, BUT IT WAS INTRUSIVE.

472. A BEAUTIFUL HOME, BY THE WAY.

473. HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?

474. FOR YOUR HOME PHONE NUMBER.

475. YOU'RE RIGHT IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD. YOU'RE RIGHT UP THE STREET.

476. YOU'RE THE HOUSE

477. CALL IT, AN ARBOR? - AN ARBOR.

478. ARBOR. YEAH, YOU'VE GOT THE ARBOR IN THE FRONT.

479. - I KNOW THAT HOUSE. - YOU KNOW, I'M A LITTLE

480. ALL THIS INFORMATION. - WHAT AM I GONNA DO?

481. IN THE DOCTOR BUSINESS.

482. SO CONFIDENTIAL, YOU KNOW?

483. I HAVE TOO MANY PATIENTS. I DON'T WANT THEM ALL TO HAVE MY INFORMATION.

484. WELL, I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS IT.

485. WELL, DON'T CALL, DON'T KNOCK ON THE DOOR...

486. - OH YEAH. - ... BUT YOU'RE

487. - YOU HAVE A PROBLEM. - OH, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.

488. ABOUT THE HAND?

489. PUT A BANDAGE ON; NOT PUT A BANDAGE ON.

490. IN MY OPINION, IT'D BE BETTER TO LEAVE IT OPEN.

491. WELL, ARE YOU

492. WITH THE OSSO BUCO?

493. I DON'T QUITE SEE THE CONNECTION.

494. WELL, YOUR RESTAURANT RECOMMENDATION WAS SO AWFUL,

495. I JUST DON'T SEE YOUR MEDICAL RECOMMENDATION.

496. THEY'RE DIFFERENT.

497. NOT TO ME.

498. - WRAP IT UP. - YOU WANT IT WRAPPED UP?

499. - YEAH. - ALL RIGHT, DOCTOR. WHATEVER YOU SAY.

500. - HELLO? - LARRY? HI, IT'S MARY JANE.

501. OH, HEY, CAN I CALL YOU BACK? I'M EXERCISING.

502. UH, NO, YOU KNOW,

503. AND HE KNOWS IT'S YOU. HE KNOWS YOU WERE HERE.

504. - WHAT? - Yeah, it was really horrible.

505. AND YOUR ADDRESS.

506. ARE YOU CRAZY? WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?

507. I know, I'm sorry. It's crazy,

508. HE JUST WORE ME DOWN.

509. IT WAS SO HORRIBLE,

510. AND HE'S ON HIS WAY TO YOUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW.

511. OH MY.

512. OH, SHIT.

513. HI, DR. MORRISON. I'M SO SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.

514. SOMEBODY'S AFTER ME. THEY'RE AT MY HOUSE.

515. I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!

516. AND I SAW YOUR HOUSE.

517. MR. DAVID, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?

518. I'M— I'M TELLING YOU— I JUST NEED A PLACE TO STAY.

519. STAY HERE FOR A WHILE, SPEND THE NIGHT.

520. - YEAH, WELL, YOU CAN'T. YOU CAN'T— SPEND THE NIGHT? - I'LL GO IN THE GUEST ROOM.

521. I'LL CLOSE THE DOOR. YOU WON'T EVEN KNOW I'M HERE!

522. I'M SITTING HERE NIGHT WITH MY WIFE,

523. WE'RE HAVING A GLASS OF WINE,

524. HERE ALL NIGHT? - HELLO. I'M SO SORRY.

525. PLEASE DON'T INVOLVE MRS. MORRISON.

526. I'M NOT INVOLVING HER. BY THE WAY.

527. - THANK YOU. - LOVELY. I LOVE THAT PRINT.

528. AND I THINK IT'S A LITTLE PROVOCATIVE,

529. WITH NO PANTS ON! AND GET DRESSED.

530. I WAS RUNNING OUT! I RAN OUT OF THE HOUSE.

531. MY PHONE NUMBER, YOU CALL ME.

532. YOU DRIVE BY MY HOUSE. NOW YOU'RE IN MY HOUSE?

533. I JUST HANG OUT HERE? I'LL SIT ON THE STEPS.

534. WHAT, ALL NIGHT? SIT ON THE STEPS?

535. - I CAN'T GO OUT THERE! - MY FAMILY IS HERE!

536. ON THE STEPS, MRS. MORRISON?

537. NO NO, MRS. MORRISON DOES— YOU'RE NOT STAYING ON THE STEPS.

538. YOU KNOW, YOU'RE A DOCTOR. YOU'RE SENDING ME OUT TO GET HURT.

539. THE HIPPOCRATIC OATH?

540. WHEN YOU'RE HURT, COME BACK AND I'LL TREAT YOU.

541. - GO HOME, MR. DAVID! - DO YOU AGREE WITH THIS?

542. - DO YOU AGREE WITH THIS?

543. PLEASE! DON'T BRING MRS. MORRISON INTO THIS.

544. - FINE. TO PUT SOME PANTS ON.

545. YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE GOING TO BE

546. AN EMERGENCY CALL.

547. - AND I'M GOING TO BE MAKING AN EMERGENCY CALL! - CALL MY SERVICE!

548. I'M CALLING AN EMERGENCY CALL TO YOU!

549. DON'T CALL ME AND I'LL CALL YOU!

550. I'M SO HAPPY YOU'RE HOME. YOU'VE GOT TO LET ME COME IN AND SPEND THE NIGHT.

551. SOMEBODY'S CHASING ME. THERE'S A GUY AFTER ME.

552. I SWEAR TO GOD! I'M NOT MAKING IT UP!

553. - WHAT ARE YOU WEARING? - WHAT? I'M WEARING SHORTS.

554. - THAT'S DISGUSTING. - I WORKOUT IN SHORTS. I'M SORRY.

555. YOU KNOW SOMETHING? ME LAST NIGHT.

556. HIS CONFIDENCE. YOU KNOW THAT?

557. HE CAN'T SING ANYMORE BECAUSE OF YOU.

558. WELL, I'LL— YOU KNOW, I'LL TALK TO HIM.

559. - TALK TO HIM? - I WILL. I WILL.

560. YEAH, BUILD UP HIS CONFIDENCE AFTER THAT.

561. I ACTUALLY WILL. I'LL DO THAT.

562. MOTHERFUCKER.

563. - I'M SELFISH? - YOU ARE.

564. I BUY YOU A FANTASTIC GIFT,

565. AND YOU TAKE JEFF GREENE? THAT'S $150.

566. - SO WHAT? - THAT'S MY $150!

567. IS THAT WHAT'S BOTHERING YOU? $150?

568. AT LEAST I GAVE YOU A PRESENT. I DIDN'T HAVE MY DAUGHTER

569. - SING SOME BULLSHIT SONG... - HERE. HERE'S YOUR $150.

570. - TAKE YOUR $150... - ... AND NOT BE ABLE TO CARRY A TUNE!

571. AND GO BUY YOURSELF SOME FUCKING PANTS, WILL YOU?

572. - HEY, I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE HOME. - HEY.

573. MARY JANE PORTER'S BOYFRIEND IS AFTER ME.

574. - WHAT'S GOING ON? THE NIGHT HERE!

575. I WON'T BOTHER YOU. I WON'T EVEN USE THE KITCHEN!

576. I'LL JUST STAY IN THE GUEST ROOM.

577. - PLEASE. COME ON. - ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

578. - COME ON IN. - PUT SOMETHING ON. I DON'T WANT TO HAVE TO LOOK AT THIS.

579. JESUS. SHUT UP!

580. WHAT THE FUCK? SHUT THE FUCK UP!

581. SHUT THE FUCK UP!

582. JESUS CHRIST!

583. - WHAT THE FUCK? - Sammi: MOMMY!

584. TO SHUT THE FUCK UP! - Susie: HE DID WHAT?

585. - OUT! - HUH? WHAT?

586. - OUT! OUT! GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE! - WHAT THE HELL?

587. YOU INGRATE! YOU HURT SAMMI ONE MORE TIME, LARRY!

588. OF MY HOUSE, OKAY?

589. OF A TALENTED YOUNG GIRL!

590. YOU PIECE OF SHIT! PIECE OF SHIT!

591. OUT!

592. - ANYWAY, I'M SORRY THAT YOU TOOK IT SO PERSONALLY... - THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

593. BECAUSE IT REALLY— HONESTLY, IT REALLY WASN'T YOU.

594. - YOU MEAN THAT? - YES, ABSOLUTELY.

595. - NOW COME ON. - JUST GO SING, WILL YOU, PLEASE?

596. - OKAY. OKAY. THANKS. - OKAY.

597. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

598. - WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? TO THAT SINGER.

599. - WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? - UH, LISTEN.

600. I'M MEETING CHRISTIAN SLATER

601. AND MY BOYFRIEND'S IN THE BATHROOM RIGHT NOW.

602. HE'S GONNA COME OUT AND— YOU SHOULD GO.

603. - DON'T STAND THERE. - YEAH, BUT HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT I LOOK LIKE.

604. - GO GO GO GO. - YEAH, BUT—

605. I KNOW.

606. - OH, WHOA, I'M SORRY. - OH. SORRY. I'M SORRY.

607. OH, WAIT, ARE YOU LARRY DAVID?

608. NO. NUH-UH.

609. - NO. NO. - WHAT?

610. HEY HEY! EXCUSE ME. HEY HEY!

611. HEY HEY! HEY!

612. YOU'RE NOT BY ANY CHANCE, ARE YOU?

613. YEAH, I AM.

614. THANK YOU. THANKS, MAN. HEY!