Curb Your Enthusiasm 4x4

1. Captions made possible by HOME BOX OFFICE, INC.

2. THERE.

3. THERE WE GO, LARRY.

4. AND YOU'LL BE READY FOR DR. FUNKHOUSER.

5. THANK YOU, DELILAH.

6. HEY, SAUL.

7. HOW ARE YOU?

8. MM, LOST A CROWN.

9. SORRY ABOUT LAST TIME.

10. YOU'RE NOT GONNA THROW UP THIS TIME.

11. I SWEAR.

12. I HOPE NOT.

13. NOW, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THAT YOU'RE ALLERGIC?

14. I CAN'T DO THE GAS, IT JUST MAKES ME SICK.

15. GO... AAH.

16. WHAT'S THIS?

17. WE HAVE TO DO THIS NOW, IT'S INSURANCE.

18. OPEN UP.

19. YOU'RE GONNA TAKE A PICTURE OF MY MOUTH?

20. WIDE, OPEN UP WIDE.

21. THAT'S VERY, VERY ANGRY AND RED TODAY,

22. IT'S GONNA BE FINE.

23. BY THE WAY, IT WAS VERY

24. FOR MY UNCLE LEO'S TESTIMONIAL.

25. HIS TESTIMONIAL?

26. I MEAN, I'VE GOT PEOPLE COMING FROM RUSSIA, YOU KNOW.

27. REALLY?

28. COMING FROM RUSSIA.

29. I DON'T SEE HIM ANYMORE THOUGH.

30. DOES HE STILL PLAY?

31. MY UNCLE LEO, HE'S NOT A SPRING CHICKEN.

32. YEAH, I KNOW.

33. YOU KNOW, I MEAN, SOMETIMES HE'S FEELING LIKE HE COULD DO IT,

34. AND SOMETIMES HE DOESN'T WANT TO EMBARRASS HIMSELF.

35. WE'LL DO THIS.

36. WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

37. IT'S A LITTLE SEDATIVE.

38. YOU CAN'T TAKE THE GAS, THIS IS THE ALTERNATIVE.

39. OH.

40. AND WE'LL DO IT.

41. COME ON, COME ON, COME ON.

42. THE NEEDLE?

43. NO, NO, YOU KNOW WHAT,

44. I'M JUST CONCERNED THAT IF I ROLL IT UP,

45. IT'S GONNA LOSE ITS ELASTICITY.

46. CLINGS TO THE WRIST NOW?

47. FOR A REASON,

48. 'CAUSE IT SNAPS BACK.

49. YOU'D THINK IT WOULD, BUT IT'S NOT LIKE A SOCK.

50. A SOCK SNAPS BACK.

51. YOU CAN WEAR A SOCK, 500 TIMES WITH NO PROBLEM.

52. NO, SOCKS ARE CHEAP, THEY DON'T SNAP BACK.

53. IT TO LOSE ITS ELASTICITY.

54. BELIEVE ME, ON VERY FEW SUBJECTS I'M A EXPERT ON,

55. AND I'M AN EXPERT ON ELASTIC.

56. ALRIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU KNOW WHAT, LARRY?

57. IF YOU'RE THAT CONCERNED ABOUT IT,

58. WHY DON'T YOU JUST TAKE IT OFF YOUR BODY,

59. AND THEN YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT IT...

60. OH, OKAY.

61. SORRY, EXCUSE ME, UH, MR. SHERMAN IS ON THE PHONE.

62. WELL, JUST TALK TO HIM, I'M WITH A PATIENT RIGHT NOW.

63. TO TALK TO YOU.

64. WHY?

65. IT'S THE ROOT CANAL, HE'S CALLED THREE TIMES.

66. ALRIGHT, OKAY, FINE, ALRIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT,

67. WE'RE JUST GONNA ROLL

68. BECAUSE I HAVEN'T GOT THE TIME.

69. THE SHIRT OFF.

70. PROBLEMS IN THERE, LARRY,

71. TO DO THIS NOW.

72. ON THE PHONE,

73. IN THE WAITING ROOM,

74. AND THIS IS ENOUGH ALREADY, IT'S ENOUGH!

75. KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

76. YOU'RE GONNA FEEL FINE.

77. WHAT LINE IS IT?

78. LINE ONE.

79. OH, GREAT, LOOK, HE RUINED THE SHIRT.

80. LOOK, LOOK AT THIS CUFF,

81. AND IT'S FLOPPING ALL OVER THE PLACE, LOOK AT THAT.

82. WHAT, WHAT'S, WHAT'S WITH HIM?

83. HE'S NOT HIMSELF RIGHT NOW.

84. HAS HODGKIN'S.

85. YEAH, BUT IT'S THE GOOD HODGKIN'S.

86. I DIDN'T KNOW THERE WAS A GOOD HODGKIN'S.

87. I'M NOT SAYING IT'S A GREAT HODGKIN'S.

88. IT'S A GOOD HODGKIN'S.

89. I'LL GET IT.

90. HEY, POP.

91. MMM?

92. DO ME A FAVOR, OKAY?

93. NEXT TIME USE THE BATHROOM, MAKE SURE TO KEEP THE SEAT DOWN.

94. WHAT ARE YOU, PUSSY WHIPPED?

95. IT'S NOT REALLY ABOUT HER, IT'S ABOUT ME.

96. I PEE SITTING DOWN.

97. BEEN DOING THAT?

98. WELL, IT STARTED TO GO AT NIGHT SOMETIMES,

99. AND, UH, I DIDN'T FEEL LIKE PUTTING THE LIGHT ON,

100. SO I WOULD SIT DOWN, AND THEN I, YOU KNOW,

101. WITH IT, YOU KNOW.

102. COMFORTABLE WITH... A MAN DOESN'T DO THAT.

103. A MAN STANDS UP TO PEE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

104. I LIKE TO SIT DOWN, AND I DON'T WANT TO WIND UP IN THE TOILET,

105. BECAUSE YOU'RE KEEPING THE SEAT UP.

106. KEEP THE SEAT DOWN.

107. NO, YOU STAND LIKE A PERSON.

108. I'M VERY UPSET WITH THIS, THIS IS CRAZY.

109. WINSTON CHURCHILL SAID,

110. "WHY STAND WHEN YOU CAN SIT?"

111. THAT EXPRESSION?

112. NO, I NEVER HEARD THAT EXPRESSION.

113. BUT I DON'T THINK HE MEANT THE TOILET.

114. FOR YOU AT THE DRUG STORE?

115. YES, I'M JUST ABOUT OUT OF THEM.

116. GO PICK UP THE DROPS FOR ME, AND THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

117. OKAY.

118. LARRY, SO THAT WAS SUSIE.

119. UM, THEY'RE HAVING A DINNER PARTY ON FRIDAY,

120. THE FUNKHOUSER TESTIMONIAL,

121. THEY'RE HAVING A LITTLE, YOU KNOW, DINNER PARTY

122. FROM RUSSIA, SO,

123. AND, UH, TED DANSON WILL BE THERE WITH MARY.

124. OH, OKAY, TED ASKED US TO TAKE CARE OF HIS DOG.

125. THEY'RE GOING OUT OF TOWN FOR A COUPLE OF DAYS SO I SAID OKAY.

126. US?

127. OH, YOU'RE NOT GONNA DO ANYTHING?

128. IT'S JUST GONNA BE ME?

129. I LIKE DOGS, I'M VERY HAPPY TO DO IT.

130. OKAY, YOU DO THAT.

131. UH, LOOK WHAT THIS DENTIST DID TO MY SHIRT TODAY.

132. WHAT HAPPENED?

133. IT'S ALL STRETCHED OUT.

134. YEAH, I KNOW.

135. AT THESE DINNER PARTIES,

136. THE ONE I'VE HAVING.

137. RIGHT, MM-HMM.

138. EXCEPT WHEN YOU'RE SITTING NEXT TO ME.

139. NO, IT STILL FEELS THAT WAY.

140. WHAT ARE YOU DOING, WHAT HAVE YOU GOT, THE MAIL?

141. YEAH, I GRABBED IT ON THE WAY OUT,

142. OH, A BILL FROM DR. FUNKHOUSER.

143. YOU'RE KIDDING, ALREADY?

144. YEAH, WONDER IF SAUL'S GONNA BE THERE TONIGHT?

145. HE DIDN'T MENTION ANYTHING TO ME ABOUT IT.

146. I JUST SAW HIM.

147. I CAN'T BELIEVE HE ALREADY SENT ME A BILL.

148. BOY, THAT WAS FAST.

149. NEEDS HIS MONEY.

150. OOH, EEEW, AAAH!

151. OH! OH MY GOD.

152. WHAT ARE YOU CRAZY?

153. YOU ALMOST, WHAT'S GOING ON?

154. WHAT IS THAT?

155. HERE'S A COPY OF

156. FOR INSURANCE PURPOSES?

157. MY TOOTH, THAT'S MY TOOTH?

158. OH MY GOD, THAT'S IN YOUR MOUTH.

159. SENDING IT TO ME FOR?

160. WHY DIDN'T THEY SEND IT TO THE INSURANCE COMPANY?

161. I DON'T NEED A COPY OF THAT!

162. MY GOD!

163. THIS IS GREAT.

164. FOR YOUR UNCLE'S TESTIMONIAL?

165. YES, HIS FAVORITE UNCLE.

166. FAVORITE UNCLE, HUH?

167. IT'S NICE, YOU GET TO SEE YOUR COUSIN MARTY, RIGHT?

168. HE LOVES MARTY.

169. THROUGH A TRANSLATOR.

170. IT'S FUN, YEAH.

171. THIS WITH MY WIFE.

172. WHAT'S WITH THE BARE FEET?

173. IT'S MORE COMFORTABLE THIS WAY.

174. FEELS LIKE AT HOME, YOU KNOW.

175. OH, YEAH?

176. UH, WHERE DID, WHERE DO YOU,

177. YOUR GLASSES, IN FRANCE?

178. LOS ANGELES.

179. CAN HE TRY IT ON?

180. UH, YOU KNOW WHAT?

181. I DON'T REALLY LIKE PEOPLE TRYING MY GLASSES ON.

182. JUST FOR ONE MINUTE.

183. I'D RATHER NOT, I'M A LITTLE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH IT, YEAH.

184. OH, HE'S A GUEST HERE, SO, LIKE...

185. I UNDERSTAND.

186. BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN I NEED HIM TO TRY ON MY GLASS,

187. UH, NO, NO, NO.

188. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

189. NO!

190. OKAY.

191. IS NUTS.

192. FOR MY GLASSES.

193. GRABBED FOR YOUR GLASSES?

194. JUST GRABBED MY GLASSES, HE WANTED TO TRY THEM ON.

195. I SAID I DON'T LIKE WHEN PEOPLE TRY MY GLASSES ON.

196. FOR THEM?

197. YEAH, AND WHAT'S WITH THE NO SHOES?

198. THAT'S GREAT,

199. DISGUSTING FEET ALL NIGHT?

200. THEY'LL BE UNDER THE TABLE.

201. WHERE'S TED AND MARY?

202. THEY HAD A MOVIE PREMIERE, THEY COULDN'T MAKE IT.

203. OH, TOO BAD, TOO BAD.

204. IT WOULD'VE BEEN NICE TO HAVE HIM HERE.

205. YEAH.

206. THESE FUNKHOUSERS.

207. YEAH, IT'S A CHOCK FULL OF FUNKHOUSERS.

208. JEFFREY, I NEED YOU IN THE KITCHEN, HONEY.

209. ALRIGHT.

210. OSCAR, COME ON BOY, COME HERE BOY, YEAH.

211. WHO'S A GOOD BOY, YEAH, HE'S A GOOD BOY,

212. OH, WHAT A GOOD BOY, YEAH, GOOD BOY.

213. ENJOYING THE DOG?

214. DINNER'S SERVED.

215. AND HE'S GONNA TAKE CARE OF TED'S DOG.

216. VERY GOOD.

217. 'TIL 10, YOUNG LADY.

218. HI, LARRY.

219. HI, SAMMI.

220. YOUR SHOES OFF LIKE THAT GUY.

221. THAT GUY, I DON'T THINK SO.

222. YOU COULD BE TWINS.

223. YEAH, I DON'T WANT TO BE TWINS WITH HIM.

224. OH, NO, COME ON, SAMMI, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

225. SAMMI, SAMMI, COME ON, GIVE ME THAT SNEAKER, SAMMI.

226. HEY, LAR, YOU EVER HEAR OF DENTA FRIEND?

227. DENTA FRIEND, NO.

228. IT'S A NEW

229. GET RID OF YOUR PLAQUE.

230. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, GET RID OF MY PLAQUE?

231. I DON'T HAVE ANY PLAQUE.

232. MY COUSIN'S HYGIENIST TOLD ME YOU HAD PLAQUE.

233. YOUR COUSIN'S HYGIENIST TOLD YOU I HAVE A LOT OF PLAQUE?

234. WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL? PLAQUE IS NOT A SERIOUS DISEASE.

235. FIRST OF ALL, NUMBER ONE, I DON'T HAVE ANY PLAQUE.

236. NUMBER TWO, SHE SHOULDN'T BE TALKING ABOUT IT.

237. THAT'S A BREECH OF PATIENT/HYGIENIST CONFIDENTIALITY.

238. THERE IS NO PATIENT/HYGIENIST CONFIDENTIALITY.

239. YOU'RE SO WRONG, THERE IS SO.

240. IT'S UNETHICAL,

241. OR A LAWYER,

242. BUT IT'S UNETHICAL IS WHAT HE'S SAYING.

243. IT'S TOTALLY UNETHICAL.

244. AND I DON'T HAVE ANY PLAQUE BY THE WAY.

245. ELECTRIC TOOTHBRUSH?

246. HE HAS AN ELECTRIC TOOTHBRUSH.

247. DO I FLOSS?

248. TWICE A DAY.

249. TELL HIM I DON'T HAVE ANY PLAQUE,

250. OKAY, DID YOU TELL HIM THAT?

251. YOU HAVE PLAQUE.

252. CONTEST WITH ME, MARTY?

253. ANY TIME YOU WANT.

254. ANY TIME YOU WANT.

255. LET'S HAVE A PLAQUE CONTEST.

256. FINE, YOU WANT TO.

257. LIKE YOU DO IN GOLF.

258. BY THE WAY, THAT TIP,

259. AT BEN STILLER'S HOUSE?

260. HAVE YOU TRIED IT?

261. I EVER GOT.

262. FANTASTIC, YEAH. FANTASTIC TIP?

263. HOLD IT, HOLD IT, I'VE GOT A TIP THAT WILL SAVE YOUR GAME.

264. CHANGE IT, IT'S THE EASIEST THING,

265. GAVE IT TO ME.

266. A GOOD GOLF TIP?

267. TWO WEEKS AGO,

268. AND IT'S CHANGED MY ENTIRE GAME, AND IT IS SO SIMPLE.

269. REALLY? WHAT IS IT?

270. THIS WAY AND HOLD IT.

271. WHICH WAY, OKAY.

272. YEAH, OKAY.

273. NOW, INSTEAD OF BRINGING YOUR HANDS BACK LIKE THIS.

274. RIGHT.

275. SAMMI, WHAT IS IT? WHAT, WHAT?

276. WHAT IS THAT? WHAT IS THIS?

277. OH, IT'S DISGUSTING.

278. IS THIS?

279. HEY, WAIT A SECOND.

280. THAT'S A PICTURE OF MY TOOTH,

281. FOR INSURANCE PURPOSES.

282. GET THAT?

283. OF LARRY'S JACKET.

284. MY JACKET?

285. STUFF OUT LIKE THAT FOR?

286. INTO A PERSON'S HOUSE FOR?

287. INTO MY CAR.

288. INTO THEIR HOUSE?

289. DISGUSTING, LARRY.

290. WELL, IT WAS IN MY POCKET, SHE WENT THROUGH MY POCKET.

291. YOU KNOW WHAT? I THINK WE'RE GONNA LEAVE.

292. ALRIGHT, WE HAD A GREAT TIME, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

293. OKAY I'M SORRY ABOUT THIS, WE'LL SEE YOU AT THE TESTIMONIAL.

294. CROWN, I WAS GETTING A CROWN, THAT'S ALL, AND...

295. SHE SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN GOING THROUGH THE PAPERS.

296. CHERYL, IT'S DISGUSTING.

297. IT IS DISGUSTING, BELIEVE ME, I THINK WE'RE GONNA LEAVE.

298. I'M NOT FEELING VERY WELL.

299. WHAT, YOU'RE NOT WELL?

300. NO, I HAD TOO MUCH CAKE.

301. OH.

302. OH, UM, I NEED MY, UH, MY SNEAKER.

303. LARRY, NOW IS NOT THE TIME, OKAY.

304. OK.

305. WITHOUT YOUR SNEAKER.

306. ARE YOU DRIVING?

307. SNEAKERS AT HOME.

308. OKAY, YOUR SOCK MIGHT GET DIRTY.

309. SAMMI, SAMMI, WHERE'S MY— ?

310. LARRY!

311. IT'S OKAY, YOU'RE GONNA BE OKAY.

312. YOU KNOW, SHE COULD HAVE TOLD ME WHERE THE SNEAKER WAS.

313. IT'S NOT THAT HARD.

314. IN THE CLOSET, THREE WORDS.

315. ONE WORD, CLOSET, HOW ABOUT THAT?

316. THAT HYGIENIST?

317. IT'S, LIKE, IF YOU GO TO A PROSTITUTE,

318. YOU GOT A SMALL PENIS,

319. NOT THAT I'VE EVER BEEN TO A PROSTITUTE.

320. A SMALL PENIS, YOU KNOW.

321. $300 FOR A HOOKER,

322. HER MOUTH SHUT.

323. UGH.

324. I'M ONLY GUESSING $300, WHAT DO I KNOW?

325. WHAT?

326. IS KILLING ME.

327. AT THEIR HOUSE AGAIN.

328. I SWEAR, I DON'T KNOW WHAT SUSIE DOES WHEN SHE COOKS,

329. BUT IT'S AWFUL.

330. YEAH, IT WAS REALLY PRETTY BAD, WASN'T IT?

331. OH, MY GOD, IT WAS SO BAD.

332. MYSELF THROW UP.

333. THAT'S HOW BAD IT IS.

334. OH, GOD, POOR THING.

335. OH, JUST FEEL LIKE I NEED, UH...

336. OH, QUIET, QUIET, THE WEATHERMAN'S ON.

337. By the beaches it is a bit cool, around 70 degrees,

338. but tomorrow's forecast, folks, I'm sorry to say it,

339. it is rain, thundershowers,

340. the big ones, folks, all day.

341. So for you golfers out there,

342. better find something else to do.

343. I know I'll be watching that "Godfather" trilogy.

344. Jennifer, Stu, back to you.

345. HELLO.

346. HEY.

347. You listening to this?

348. YEAH, I JUST SAW IT, LISTEN...

349. UH, I'M NOT GONNA PLAY.

350. WHAT?

351. Come on, it's gonna rain.

352. HE'S ONLY SAYING IT'S GONNA RAIN.

353. WE DON'T KNOW FOR SURE.

354. HE'S ONLY SAYING IT'S GONNA RAIN?

355. IT'S HIS JOB, IT'S GONNA RAIN.

356. LET'S WAKE UP

357. ON THE PHONE AND SEE...

358. No, no, no, you know what, I'm gonna stay home with Sammi.

359. WHAT?

360. NO, SHE'S HAVING A TOUGH, TOUGH NIGHT,

361. AND I JUST THINK, IT'D BE BETTER

362. WITH HER TOMORROW.

363. HE'S NOT RIGHT ALL THE TIME, YOU KNOW.

364. WELL, HE'S RIGHT MOST OF THE TIME.

365. AND YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S GONNA RAIN TOMORROW, OKAY?

366. OKAY.

367. BYE. Bye.

368. AAH!

369. WHAT?

370. AAAH!

371. WHAT HAPPENED, LARRY?

372. THE TOILET.

373. UH, DID YOU LEAVE THE SEAT UP?

374. OH, I GUESS I DID WHEN I TRIED TO THROW UP.

375. OH, I'M SORRY.

376. OH, YOU GOTTA KEEP THE SEAT DOWN, CHERYL,

377. THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK, TO KEEP A SEAT DOWN!

378. SOAKING WET.

379. I HURT MY BACK, SOAKING WET, OH.

380. AAH...

381. WHAT'S WRONG?

382. MY BACK, OH.

383. NIGHT'S SLEEP.

384. MAN, CHERYL...

385. IT'S BEAUTIFUL OUT.

386. THE WEATHERMAN PREDICTED RAIN.

387. WELL, SOMETIMES THEY'RE WRONG, LARRY.

388. PREDICTS RAIN, DOESN'T RAIN,

389. IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME THIS HAS HAPPENED.

390. CHERYL, SOMETHING FISHY'S GOING ON HERE.

391. PREDICTS IT'S GONNA RAIN

392. FOR HIMSELF,

393. OF THAT THEORY?

394. I THINK IT'S RIDICULOUS.

395. REALLY, DO YOU?

396. MM-HMM.

397. WEATHERMAN I DON'T TRUST.

398. I DON'T LIKE THAT WEATHERMAN.

399. HE'S A VERY SLICK WEATHERMAN.

400. SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE REALLY ON TO SOMETHING.

401. I'M GONNA GO TO THAT GOLF COURSE.

402. SOMETHING OUT.

403. GET MY CANE.

404. OH, BROTHER.

405. HEY, CHUCK.

406. HEY, HOW'S IT GOING, LARRY?

407. NOT BAD.

408. HOW'S IT LOOKING OUT THERE?

409. IT'S WIDE OPEN, MAN, HARDLY ANYBODY OUT THERE.

410. IS THAT RIGHT?

411. YEAH, HMM, PROBABLY

412. FORECAST.

413. YOU KNOW WHAT, PROBABLY DOES.

414. HUH.

415. THE WEATHERMAN OUT THERE?

416. WELL, YES, MATTER OF FACT, THERE HE IS WITH,

417. DR. FUNKHOUSER, COMING UP ON THE NINTH HOLE.

418. WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

419. SO, UH, WHAT'S WITH THE CANE?

420. FELL IN THE TOILET.

421. HEY, LAR.

422. HEY, LARRY, WHAT'S GOING ON?

423. BEAUTIFUL DAY, HUH?

424. YEAH, GREAT DAY FOR GOLF.

425. WHAT'S UP?

426. YEAH, YOU KNOW I WAS SUPPOSED TO PLAY TODAY.

427. REALLY?

428. ABOUT THUNDER SHOWERS.

429. HE MADE A MISTAKE, SO WHAT, COME ON.

430. BE THUNDER SHOWERS?

431. YEAH, YEAH.

432. OOPS.

433. UH-OH, OH, WOOP.

434. YEAH, OKAY, NICE TO SEE YOU.

435. TOO BAD FOR ME... TOO BAD FOR ME.

436. TAKE CARE.

437. I DON'T QUITE GET YOUR POINT.

438. ALRIGHT, WEATHERMAN, I'M GONNA TELL YOU MY POINT.

439. I'VE GOT A SNEAKING SUSPICION THAT YOU'RE PREDICTING RAIN

440. FOR YOURSELF.

441. MY GOD, COME ON, LARRY.

442. THAT'S RIDICULOUS?

443. THAT'S RIDICULOUS, LARRY, COME ON.

444. IT'S HAPPENED BEFORE, WEATHERMAN, YOU KNOW IT.

445. AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

446. I'M CALLING THE WEATHER PEOPLE ON YOU.

447. AND YOU'RE GONNA SAY,

448. UH, REPORT ME BECAUSE IT'S A NICE DAY?

449. I'M GONNA REPORT YOU

450. YOU WANT TO PLAY GOLF, YOU MAKE SURE THAT IT'S RAINING.

451. LARRY, LARRY, FIRST OF ALL,

452. I'M NOT A WEATHERMAN, I'M A METEOROLOGIST.

453. I'D APPRECIATE A LITTLE BIT OF RESPECT.

454. OH, EXCUSE ME, DOCTOR.

455. JUST CALM DOWN?

456. WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF A GAME OF GOLF HERE, ALRIGHT.

457. UH, LARRY?

458. YES.

459. THERE'S A LOW PRESSURE SYSTEM SITTING OUT OVER THE COAST.

460. THAT INTO THIS AREA.

461. BY THE ROTATION OF THE EARTH.

462. CONTROLS THAT, GOD.

463. YOU KNOW WHAT, THERE'S

464. YOUR MOUTH, MY FRIEND.

465. YOU ARE BUSTED, BUDDY.

466. WITH THE CANE.

467. YOU'RE BUSTED!

468. YEAH, DR. FUNKHOUSER,

469. I'D APPRECIATE IT NEXT TIME IN THE OFFICE,

470. DON'T ROLL UP MY SLEEVE IF I REQUEST YOU NOT TO, OKAY?

471. LOOK AT, LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO MY SHIRT?

472. WITH IT?

473. IT'S NOT CLINGING ANYMORE.

474. IT'S NOT CLINGING?

475. IT'S NOT CLINGING TO THE WRIST THE WAY IT'S SUPPOSED TO.

476. FINE, OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT.

477. AND, HEY, ONE MORE THING, OKAY.

478. WHAT?

479. FROM NOW ON, DON'T TAKE ANY PICTURES OF MY MOUTH.

480. TALKING ABOUT?

481. A LITTLE GIRL!

482. WHAT?

483. HEY, WALTER BRENNAN,

484. THE BARN'S ON FIRE, THE BARN'S ON FIRE.

485. I'M TURNING YOU IN, WEATHERMAN.

486. HEY, LARRY, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU, BUDDY?

487. FELL IN THE TOILET.

488. WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

489. THE TOILET SEAT UP.

490. I FELL IN.

491. REALLY?

492. YEAH.

493. WELL, DID YOU HURT YOURSELF?

494. YEAH, I HURT MY BACK, YEAH.

495. I'M SORRY, I SHOULDN'T BE LAUGHING AT YOU.

496. THAT'S ALRIGHT, IT'S FUNNY, I GUESS.

497. YEAH, WELL, NO, I MEAN, IT'S...

498. HEY, YOU KNOW, SOMETHING'S THAT GOOD THAT I RAN INTO YOU,

499. THIS MORNING, AND, UH,

500. WE'RE GONNA GO AHEAD AND BOARD,

501. UH, ROXY, OUR DOG, UM...

502. WHAT?

503. TAKE CARE OF HER, BUT, UH,

504. I JUST THINK IT'S BETTER TO PUT IT INTO A KENNEL.

505. IT'S A SMALL DOG, WOULDN'T BE MUCH POINT ANY WAY.

506. FORWARD TO IT.

507. I LIKE DOGS.

508. YEAH, UM, I JUST THINK, I JUST THINK, UH, YOU KNOW,

509. OR SOMETHING.

510. UM, BUT I REALLY APPRECIATE THE OFFER, I DO.

511. THANK YOU, THAT WAS VERY SWEET OF YOU.

512. BY ANY CHANCE?

513. YEAH, I TALKED TO HER THIS MORNING.

514. BEING AT THE PARTY LAST NIGHT.

515. ABOUT, UH, LAST NIGHT?

516. YEAH, SHE WAS KIND OF MIFFED THAT WE DIDN'T CALL.

517. WE HAD TO GO SOMEPLACE ELSE.

518. BE THERE, BUT, UH, WHY?

519. NO REASON.

520. UH, ALRIGHT, I'M GOING TO,

521. GONNA GO HIT SOME, HIT SOME BALLS.

522. I'LL SEE YA.

523. YEAH, SEE YA.

524. HEY.

525. MY SNEAKER.

526. ALRIGHT, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?

527. THE TOILET.

528. HOW'D YOU FALL IN THE TOILET?

529. AND THE SEAT WAS UP.

530. HAVE TO DO WITH YOU?

531. I PEE SITTING DOWN.

532. YOU PEE SITTING DOWN?

533. YEAH, HAVE YOU EVER TRIED IT?

534. NO!

535. IT'S MORE COMFORTABLE,

536. YOU DON'T HAVE TO TURN THE LIGHT ON AND WAKE UP,

537. AND YOU GET TO READ.

538. READING?

539. I'M READING A LOT OF STUFF.

540. WHAT STUFF?

541. IF I PEE 20 TIMES DURING A DAY,

542. THE WHOLE "NEW YORK TIMES", FOR GOD'S SAKE.

543. 20 TIMES?

544. YEAH, HEY, BUDDY, WHEN YOU'RE PEEING ALL OVER YOUR SHOE,

545. I'M LEARNING SOMETHING.

546. I'M PEEING OVER MY SHOE

547. WHILE YOU'RE LEARNING SOMETHING?

548. ALRIGHT, JUST GET MY SNEAKER, WILL YOU?

549. I DON'T NEED TO DISCUSS THIS.

550. JEFFREY, WHO'S THERE?

551. LARRY.

552. CARMELITA, PUT OSCAR IN THE BEDROOM AND CLOSE THE DOOR.

553. HEY.

554. HI, LAR.

555. GET THIS, THE WEATHERMAN IS A TOTAL FRAUD.

556. AND HE'LL HAVE THE GOLF COURSE TO HIMSELF.

557. I JUST CAME FROM THERE, HE'S PLAYING WITH YOUR COUSIN.

558. WHY DO YOU PEE SITTING DOWN?

559. MANY REASONS.

560. STANDING UP?

561. BY THE WAY, YOU LEFT LAST NIGHT.

562. THE WEATHERMAN'S TIP

563. GAVE IT TO ME.

564. I CAN'T.

565. AND SAID "DON'T GIVE IT TO LARRY."

566. WHAT AN ASSHOLE.

567. WELL, HE'S NOT AN ASSHOLE, HE HAS HIS TIPS.

568. HE IS AN ASSHOLE.

569. HAPPENED TO YOU?

570. FROM YOUR DINNER LAST NIGHT,

571. THE TOILET SEAT UP,

572. AND FELL ON THE TOILET.

573. SHE DIDN'T GET SICK FROM MY DINNER, LARRY, OKAY?

574. HEY, HOW ARE YOU FEELING?

575. I'M NOT FEELING GREAT.

576. YEAH, MARTY, YOU'RE NEVER FEELING GREAT, OKAY.

577. AND LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION.

578. WHAT?

579. TODAY BY ANY CHANCE?

580. YEAH, HE CALLED TO SEE HOW THE PARTY WENT.

581. MM, 'CAUSE I WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF HIS DOG,

582. TOLD ME I DIDN'T NEED TO.

583. MM, I WONDER WHY.

584. YEAH, I WONDER.

585. I'LL GET YOUR SNEAKER.

586. HEY, MARTY, LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION.

587. HAVE GOOD HODGKIN'S?

588. OSCAR ATE IT.

589. Well, I am the good news, bad news kid.

590. The good news is, folks, that wonderful weather

591. we've been enjoying here all week

592. in the whole Los Angeles basin, that's gonna continue tonight,

593. and all day tomorrow, Saturday.

594. So if you're going to the Leo Funkhouser testimonial,

595. I'll see you there.

596. We're gonna have a wonderful day and Leo,

597. nobody deserves this more than you do.

598. but the bad news is we have a cold weather front

599. that's gonna push in around midnight Saturday night.

600. We're gonna have thunder showers all day Sunday

601. and they're gonna continue all the way into Monday.

602. Folks, don't shoot me, I'm just the messenger.

603. Alright, back to you.

604. I'M NOT REALLY DRESSED APPROPRIATELY FOR THIS THING.

605. I THINK YOU'RE FINE.

606. WHAT ARE YOU DOING, WHAT'S THIS?

607. THESE ARE NAME TAGS.

608. NAME TAGS?

609. MM-HMM.

610. OKAY.

611. WHAT FOR?

612. NAME TAGS.

613. WHAT?

614. THANK YOU.

615. HI, HI CHERYL.

616. HI SAUL.

617. OUR NAME TAGS.

618. NAME TAGS?

619. YEAH, EVERYBODY'S WEARING A NAME TAG.

620. WHY, WHAT'S WRONG?

621. A NAME TAG?

622. YOU'RE A LITTLE TO WEAR A NAME TAG?

623. COME ON, LARRY.

624. NO, IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT.

625. IT HAS TO DO WITH MY JACKET.

626. IF I PUT THIS ON, IT'S GONNA LEAVE

627. LITTLE PAPER REMNANTS ON IT, IT'S GONNA RUIN THE SUEDE.

628. LOOK, THIS COMES OFF, IT GOES ON, ALRIGHT.

629. IT'S JUST LIKE THAT.

630. YOU KNOW WHAT?

631. OF MINE BY ROLLING UP MY SLEEVE.

632. THERE, OKAY, IT'S ON, YOU'RE GONNA GO CELEBRATE

633. WITH EVERYBODY ELSE, RIGHT?

634. COME ON, LET'S JUST GO INSIDE, OKAY, WHAT DO YOU SAY?

635. OKAY.

636. ALRIGHT, OKAY, FINE, THANK YOU FOR COMING, CHERYL.

637. THANK YOU, SAUL, OH.

638. IT'LL BE FINE, IT'S NOT VERY NICE SUEDE ANYWAY.

639. OKAY.

640. IT WAS GONNA BE THIS BIG?

641. HERE'S OUR, HERE'S OUR TABLE.

642. HEY, THERE'S JEFF.

643. HEY, LAR, WHAT'S UP?

644. YOU GUYS AREN'T AT OUR TABLE?

645. NO, WHY DON'T YOU SWITCH, NOBODY'S GONNA NOTICE.

646. I DON'T KNOW WHO THESE PEOPLE ARE.

647. SWITCH 'EM.

648. COME ON, WHO'S GONNA KNOW?

649. IT'S LIKE THEY DO THIS TO US ON PURPOSE.

650. EXCUSE ME, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

651. NO, I'M JUST MAKING SURE

652. ARE WHERE THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE, THAT'S IT.

653. AND MY HUSBAND'S.

654. OH, YEAH, OKAY, JENNY AND SAM, I THINK THIS IS...

655. OH, AND YOU'RE LARRY, LARRY DAVID.

656. YEAH, BUT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE AT THIS TABLE, YEAH.

657. UH, LISTEN, I HEARD ABOUT YOUR TOOTH PLAQUE PROBLEM, AND—

658. THE WHAT?

659. YOUR PROBLEM, YOU KNOW, WITH YOUR TOOTH PLAQUE.

660. NO, NO, NO, I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH PLAQUE.

661. WHERE'D YOU GET THIS FROM?

662. WELL, IT'S NOT IMPORTANT WHO SAID IT.

663. IT'S NOT IMPORTANT?

664. THE HYGIENIST, DID SHE TELL YOU, HUH?

665. I, I REALLY...

666. WHO, DR. FUNKHOUSER?

667. LISTEN, I KNOW ABOUT

668. HELP YOU OUT.

669. I DON'T HAVE A TOOTH PLAQUE PROBLEM.

670. THAN ANYBODY IN THIS ROOM.

671. GOOD, DON'T NEED TO KNOW.

672. OKAY, JUST DO ME A FAVOR, OKAY.

673. N'T MENTION THIS.

674. DON'T BE SO SENSITIVE.

675. IT'S NOT SOMETHING I DIDN'T GROW UP DREAMING OF DOING THIS.

676. IN FACT, IT'S NOT SOMETHING I EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT.

677. IT'S JUST SOMETHING THAT I WAS GOOD AT.

678. FOR IT SOMETHING I...

679. WELL, IF IT ISN'T THE OLD RELIABLE WEATHERMAN.

680. HEY, LARRY, WHERE'S YOUR CANE?

681. BACK'S ALL BETTER.

682. GOOD, GOOD, YEAH, NICE.

683. SO, UH, YOU CALLED MARTY FUNKHOUSER,

684. NOT TO GIVE ME THE TIP?

685. YEAH, EXACTLY WHAT I DID.

686. I GOT A LITTLE TIP FOR YOU, WEATHERMAN, OKAY?

687. OKAY.

688. WHEN YOU'RE ON THE GOLF COURSE.

689. LAR? YEAH.

690. BRING A RAIN COAT.

691. IT'S GONNA THUNDER SHOWER ALL DAY TOMORROW.

692. YOU WON'T SEE ME OUT THERE.

693. OH, I'M REALLY WORRIED, WEATHERMAN, YEAH.

694. YEAH, REALLY, IT'S GONNA, BRING A SLICKER.

695. IT'S NOT GONNA WORK.

696. IT'S NOT GONNA WORK TOMORROW, BUDDY.

697. YOUR BACK'S BETTER.

698. YEAH.

699. WELL, THIS IS A GREAT DAY

700. COUNTRY CLUB.

701. 35 YEARS AGO TO THIS DATE,

702. JOINED THIS CLUB.

703. AND ONLY JEWISH FAMILY,

704. AND TODAY WE STILL ARE, BUT WE LOVE THIS PLACE.

705. IT'S GREAT TO SEE ALL YOUR FACES HERE.

706. AND, UH, THIS IS A VERY SPECIAL DAY FOR ALL OF US.

707. YOU KNOW, IT'S NOT OFTEN THAT

708. IN FRONT OF HIS FRIENDS.

709. IT'S USUALLY AFTER THE FACT.

710. AND I'M SO PROUD OF MY DAD, HE'S MEANT SO MUCH TO ME.

711. WHEN WE WERE LITTLE, AND I WAS A BABY...

712. OH LOOK AT THIS, LOOK AT THAT.

713. THAT'S IT, THAT'S THE END OF THE JACKET...

714. HE COULDN'T DO IT ANY MORE

715. 'CAUSE I WAS TALLER THAN HE WAS.

716. WELL, WHAT A GREAT DAY.

717. UH, THERE'S NOT A LOT I CAN SAY.

718. LEO, RIGHT NOW, AS YOU ALL KNOW, HAS RETIRED.

719. MY MOM COULDN'T BE HERE TONIGHT OF COURSE.

720. 10 YEARS AGO...

721. EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME, CAN YOU KEEP IT DOWN A LITTLE BIT,

722. 'CAUSE IT'S VERY, IT'S LOUD.

723. TO MY HUSBAND.

724. HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND.

725. I UNDERSTAND, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT,

726. JUST BE A LITTLE QUIETER, THAT'S ALL.

727. YEAH, DRINK YOUR TEA OR COFFEE, WHATEVER YOU SAID,

728. MY HUSBAND SAID.

729. I'M JUST TRYING TO HEAR WHAT,

730. I'M TRYING TO HEAR WHAT YOUR COUSIN HAS TO SAY.

731. YEAH, SHUT YOUR MOUTH.

732. YOU CAN SEE YOUR PLAQUE.

733. WHAT DID HE SAY?

734. SHUT MY MOUTH, I DON'T HAVE ANY PLAQUE.

735. YOU TELL HIM I DON'T HAVE ANY PLAQUE, OKAY, YEAH.

736. YEAH, YOU HAVE FULL MOUTH FULL OF PLAQUE.

737. OH, YEAH, AT LEAST I DON'T HIDE MY BALDNESS WITH A YARMULKE.

738. HUH, HE HAS MORE HAIR THAN YOU DO.

739. I'LL BET YOU GOT NOTHING UNDER.

740. OKAY, HE'LL SHOW IT TO YOU IF YOU'LL SHOW HIM GLASSES.

741. YOU TELL HIM YOU DON'T TOUCH MY GLASSES, YEAH.

742. DON'T YOU TOUCH THOSE, DON'T TOUCH.

743. LARRY.

744. OH, I HURT MY BACK AGAIN.

745. LET'S BRING THE ROOF DOWN FOR MY FATHER,

746. LEO FUNKHOUSER.

747. LARRY, GET UP.

748. I CAN'T, I HURT MY BACK.

749. STAND UP.

750. CAN'T.

751. I HURT MY BACK.

752. LARRY, GET UP.

753. GET UP.

754. HURTS.

755. I CAN'T.

756. GET UP.

757. I CAN'T.

758. I HURT MY BACK.

759. I HURT MY BACK, OH, OH.

760. GET UP.

761. GET UP.

762. IT HAD TO FREAKING RAIN.

763. IT HAD TO FREAKING RAIN!

765. Captioned by

766. Captioned by