1. Captions made possible by
HOME BOX OFFICE, INC.Copy !req
2. PASTA IF YOU LIKE,
UH, VERY GOOD.Copy !req
3. WHAT BECAUSE,
UH, WHAT?Copy !req
4. EH?Copy !req
5. WHAT'S THE SAUCE
WITH THE FISH?Copy !req
6. WHAT, WHAT FISH?Copy !req
7. HE DIDN'T EVEN
MENTION THE FISH.Copy !req
8. THERE WAS NO FISH.Copy !req
9. THE SECOND THING?Copy !req
10. I'LL JUST HAVE THE, UH,
I'LL JUST HAVE THE FIRST THING.Copy !req
11. OKAY, AND I'LL HAVE
THE SECOND THING.Copy !req
12. GRACI.Copy !req
13. THE THING DOWN.Copy !req
14. I DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT.Copy !req
15. WHAT WE JUST ORDERED.Copy !req
16. SO GUESS WHAT'S COMING UP
IN A FEW MONTHS?Copy !req
17. I'M SURE IT'S BEEN
ON YOUR MIND,
OUR ANNIVERSARY.Copy !req
18. 10 YEARS.
10 YEAR ANNIVERSARY.Copy !req
19. BOY, THEY JUST FLEW
RIGHT BY, DIDN'T THEY?Copy !req
20. WHAT I WANT.Copy !req
21. I WOULD LIKE, UM,
AND JUST KEEP AN OPEN MIND.Copy !req
22. SO REMEMBER OUR...Copy !req
23. IS IT EVER CLOSED?Copy !req
24. EVER ONCE, HAS IT EVER
BEEN CLOSED TO ANYTHING?Copy !req
25. OKAY.Copy !req
26. UM, I WOULD LIKECopy !req
27. WEDDING CEREMONY.Copy !req
28. YOU GOT IT.Copy !req
29. YEAH.Copy !req
30. ARE YOU SERIOUS?Copy !req
31. NOTHING BIG, SMALL.Copy !req
32. OKAY, NO, NO, YEAH.Copy !req
33. AND SOME FRIENDS,
FAMILY THAT KIND OF THING.Copy !req
34. OH MY GOSH, I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU JUST SAID YES TO THAT.Copy !req
35. I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU JUST,
YOU BUILT IT ALL UP.Copy !req
36. I DID, I DIDN'T KNOW
HOW I WAS GONNA BRING UP,Copy !req
37. BUT THANK YOU.Copy !req
38. GONNA BE A HUGE FIGHT.Copy !req
39. YEAH, YEAH.Copy !req
40. WELL, NOW LET'S TALK ABOUT
MY 10th ANNIVERSARY PRESENT.Copy !req
41. ALRIGHT,
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE?Copy !req
42. ALREADY BEEN AGREED UPON.Copy !req
43. REALLY?Copy !req
44. YES.Copy !req
45. YEAH, I DON'T KNOW,
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?Copy !req
46. TALKED ABOUT THIS?Copy !req
47. AT THIS RESTAURANT.Copy !req
48. REALLY?Copy !req
49. 10 YEARS AGO RIGHT
BEFORE WE GOT MARRIED.Copy !req
50. IN THESE SEATS,
SAME SEATS.Copy !req
51. I FEEL LIKE WE'RE
MARRIED ALREADY.Copy !req
52. WE'RE JUST
MAKING IT LEGAL.Copy !req
53. IT'S JUST GONNA BE,
YOU KNOW, PERMANENTCopy !req
54. AND MY FRIENDS THINK I'M CRAZY,
BUT I DO I JUST...Copy !req
55. WELL HOW, THEY THINK
YOU'RE CRAZY, HOW DARE THEY?Copy !req
56. WELL, THAT'S WHAT I SAY.Copy !req
57. THINK YOU'RE CRAZY?Copy !req
58. I DON'T WANT TO NAME NAMES,
BUT LOOK IT'S WORKING, RIGHT?Copy !req
59. WHO, JULIE?Copy !req
60. SHE THINKS,
SHE THINKS YOU'RE CRAZY?Copy !req
61. BE A FAMILY, YOU KNOW.Copy !req
62. THE SAME LAST NAME.Copy !req
63. CHERYL DAVID.Copy !req
64. DAVID, WHAT DO YOU
WANT TO BE A DAVID FOR?Copy !req
65. I WANT TO BE YOUR WIFE...Copy !req
66. OUT OF BEING DAVID.Copy !req
67. I DON'T WANT TO BE A DAVID,
I HAVE TO BE A DAVID.Copy !req
68. BUT IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE
A DAVID, WHY BE A DAVID?Copy !req
69. I HAVE TO BE A DAVID.Copy !req
70. IS IT, ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUTCopy !req
71. THE REST OF YOUR LIFE?Copy !req
72. YOU'RE WORRIED?Copy !req
73. GET THAT? NO.Copy !req
74. BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT?Copy !req
75. OKAY, OKAY.Copy !req
76. HOW ABOUT IF WE GET MARRIED NOW,
LIKE, RIGHT NOW,Copy !req
77. FOR OUR 10 YEAR ANNIVERSARY YOU
CAN HAVE SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE?Copy !req
78. WHAT?Copy !req
79. IF THAT'S YOUR HOLD UP HERE
THEN LET'S JUST DO THAT.Copy !req
80. COME ON, YOU'RE NOT
GONNA LET ME DO THAT.Copy !req
81. SAYING THAT FOR?Copy !req
82. I WILL.Copy !req
83. JUST SEX ONE TIME,
IT'S NOT A BIG DEAL.Copy !req
84. OH, RIGHT!Copy !req
85. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU
REMEMBER THAT SO WELL.Copy !req
86. YES, I DID REMEMBER.Copy !req
87. YOU HAVE A GOOD MEMORY.Copy !req
88. FOR SOME THINGS.Copy !req
89. YEAH.
YEAH, FOR SOME THINGS.Copy !req
90. ALRIGHT WELL, I SAID YOUCopy !req
91. AND YOU SHOULD DO THAT,
IT'S OUR 10th ANNIVERSARY.Copy !req
92. YOU SHOULD DO THAT.Copy !req
93. I'M JOKING AROUND,
I'M NOT GONNA DO IT.Copy !req
94. NO, NO, NO,
NO, YOU SHOULD.Copy !req
95. 10 YEARS AGO.Copy !req
96. AND HAVE SEX WITH SOMEONE.Copy !req
97. NO, NO,
IT'S NICE, BUT...Copy !req
98. NO, NO, NO, NO.Copy !req
99. THANK YOU, THAT'S SWEET THAT
YOU WANT TO YOU, YOU KNOW.Copy !req
100. I'M INSISTING ON IT.Copy !req
101. AND EVERYTHING.Copy !req
102. NO, BECAUSE IF YOU THINK YOU CANCopy !req
103. THEN YOU SHOULD DO THAT.Copy !req
104. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?Copy !req
105. OKAY, "LADY, I'M LARRY DAVIDCopy !req
106. WITH SOMEBODY TONIGHT."Copy !req
107. I'M INSULTED, OKAY.Copy !req
108. YOU ARE?Copy !req
109. EVEN IF I WANTED TO, YOU DON'T
THINK I'M CAPABLE OF IT.Copy !req
110. NO, I DON'T THINK
YOU'RE CAPABLE OF IT.Copy !req
111. I REALLY DON'T.Copy !req
112. THAT'S WHY I THINK
YOU, UM...Copy !req
113. SO IF I DO THIS OKAY...Copy !req
114. MM-HMM.Copy !req
115. JUST SO THERE'S NO
MISUNDERSTANDING HERE.Copy !req
116. IT'S OKAY WITH YOU?Copy !req
117. MM-HMM.Copy !req
118. AND SAY HEY...Copy !req
119. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR
ANY CRYING AFTERWARDS.Copy !req
120. NO, AND SAY OH, I CAN'T
BELIEVE YOU DID THAT.Copy !req
121. NO, I WOULD NOT
BE CRYING.Copy !req
122. HUH?Copy !req
123. OH BOY, ALRIGHT,
WELL THANK YOU.Copy !req
124. 10th ANNIVERSARY PRESENT.Copy !req
125. YOU'RE WELCOME.Copy !req
126. HAVE TO DO THIS?Copy !req
127. WELL, YOU HAVE UNTIL OUR
ANNIVERSARY AND THAT'S IT.Copy !req
128. GOOD LUCK.Copy !req
129. TO SAY TO THAT YOUNG MAN.Copy !req
130. LISTEN, LISTEN MAYBE WE SHOULD
SKIP THE KARAOKE PARTY.Copy !req
131. TO SKIP KARAOKE?Copy !req
132. OH, IT'S HORRIBLE.Copy !req
133. HORRIBLE?Copy !req
134. LISTEN, WHY DON'T
WE GO HOME AND I'LL,Copy !req
135. I'LL MAKE IT
WORTH YOUR WHILE.Copy !req
136. TO GO TO KARAOKE.Copy !req
137. OH MY GOD.Copy !req
138. THAT'S THEIR DREAM THAT
THEIR WIFE SAYS OH GO AHEAD.Copy !req
139. WHAT'S MEL DOING HERE?Copy !req
140. FRANK'S BEEN IN,
LIKE, TWO OF HIS MOVIES.Copy !req
141. YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT?Copy !req
142. OH.Copy !req
143. THEY'RE OLD FRIENDS.Copy !req
144. THIS IS GREAT,
YOU GOT PERMISSION.Copy !req
145. COME ON, MAN.Copy !req
146. CHALLENGED ME TO DO IT.Copy !req
147. WELL, DAMNIT MAN, DO IT!Copy !req
148. SHE WAS LAUGHING AT ME.Copy !req
149. YOU'VE GOT TO, MAN.Copy !req
150. WELL, WHO I AM SUPPOSED
TO DO THIS WITH?Copy !req
151. I DON'T KNOW, THERE'S GOT TO BE
SOMEBODY THAT YOU THOUGHT ABOUT.Copy !req
152. WE'VE ALL—Copy !req
153. WELL, THAT DOESN'T MEAN I COULD
WALK UP TO THEM AND DO ANYTHING.Copy !req
154. I DON'T, YOU KNOW...Copy !req
155. BUT NOW YOU'VE
GOT PERMISSION.Copy !req
156. THIS IS THE THING THAT I'M THE
WORST AT IN THE WORLD, THIS.Copy !req
157. THIS AND DRAWING.Copy !req
158. IT'S A BIG THING TO DRAW,
HOW COULD I DO THAT?Copy !req
159. I COULD DO IT?Copy !req
160. YEAH, UH-HUH?Copy !req
161. GO, DADDIO, GO.Copy !req
162. PRACTICE.Copy !req
163. OKAY FINE, YEAH.Copy !req
164. IT'S A START, GO.Copy !req
165. INEPT I REALLY AM, HUH?Copy !req
166. YOU IN ACTION.Copy !req
167. DO YOU, YOU WANT
TO SEE THIS?Copy !req
168. JUST GO, GO, YEAH,
GO MAKE A MOVE.Copy !req
169. SHOW ME,
JUST PRACTICE.Copy !req
170. I'LL WATCH.Copy !req
171. GO AHEAD.Copy !req
172. DO YOU LIKE KARAOKE?Copy !req
173. YEAH.Copy !req
174. IT'S GOOD, YOU KNOW,
SOMETHING TO DO AT NIGHT.Copy !req
175. THERE'S NOTHING
TO DO AT NIGHT.Copy !req
176. DO AT NIGHT?Copy !req
177. BOWLING, MOVIES.Copy !req
178. IT'S LIKE A THIRD THING TO DO
AFTER BOWLING AND THE MOVIES.Copy !req
179. I DON'T KNOW IF YOU BOWL OR NOT,
I DON'T GO THAT OFTEN,Copy !req
180. BUT IT'S FUN,
IT'S FUN.Copy !req
181. YOU CAN'T FIND A BALL,
THAT'S THE PROBLEM.Copy !req
182. I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE
YOU OWN A BOWLING BALL.Copy !req
183. I DON'T OWN
A BOWLING BALL.Copy !req
184. I'M IN A BOWLING ALLEYCopy !req
185. IN ALL THESE HOLES,
PICKING UP THE BALLS.Copy !req
186. YOU GOT TO GET
YOUR OWN BALL.Copy !req
187. I DON'T BOWL ENOUGH
TO THINK TO GET MY OWN BALL.Copy !req
188. OF SPACE IN THE HOUSE.Copy !req
189. WITH A BOWLING BALL?Copy !req
190. I DON'T EVEN BOWL,
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?Copy !req
191. SO YOU DON'T WANT
TO GET RID OF THE BALL.Copy !req
192. HOW DO YOU GET RID
OF A BOWLING BALL?Copy !req
193. THINK ABOUT THAT.Copy !req
194. A BOWLING BALL TO?Copy !req
195. NOBODY BOWLS.Copy !req
196. THE THING, IT ONLY
FITS YOUR FINGERS.Copy !req
197. IN THE GARBAGE CAN,Copy !req
198. SANITATION MAN'S GONNA DO?Copy !req
199. HE'S GONNA
KNOCK ON YOUR DOOR.Copy !req
200. THAT'S HOW UPSET
HE'S GONNA BE.Copy !req
201. HE'S GONNA SAY WHO THE FUCKCopy !req
202. IN THE GARBAGE CAN?Copy !req
203. OKAY, ALRIGHT.Copy !req
204. I'M AROUND TOWN.Copy !req
205. HOW DID IT GO?Copy !req
206. THANK YOU, THANK YOU,
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.Copy !req
207. COME ON, EVERYBODY.Copy !req
208. PUT IT TOGETHER,
MEL BROOKS.Copy !req
209. HOW ABOUT THAT?Copy !req
210. THAT WAS FANTASTIC.Copy !req
211. ALRIGHT, NOW WHO
WANTS TO GO NEXT?Copy !req
212. HUH, ANYONE?Copy !req
213. LOOK HEY, LARRY DAVID.Copy !req
214. OH, COME ON.Copy !req
215. WHAT DO YOU SAY, LARRY, WILL YOU
COME UP AND GIVE US A SONG?Copy !req
216. OH COME ON,
STOP IT.Copy !req
217. COME ON, LAR.Copy !req
218. ARE YOU CRAZY?Copy !req
219. OH, I CAN'T DO IT.Copy !req
220. ALRIGHT.Copy !req
221. ALRIGHT.Copy !req
222. OH, SHUT UP!Copy !req
223. MEL BROOKS WANTS?Copy !req
224. I HAVE NO IDEA.Copy !req
225. USUALLY I KNOW.Copy !req
226. THE CLEAR BLUE SKY?Copy !req
227. OUT OF THE CLEAR BLUE SKY.Copy !req
228. HE'S ONE OF MY IDOLS,
YOU KNOW.Copy !req
229. I KNOW HE IS, THAT'S WHY
I WAS EXCITED FOR YOU.Copy !req
230. HEY!Copy !req
231. I'LL CALL,
I'LL CALL YOU BACK.Copy !req
232. WHAT, WHAT THE HELL
ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
233. WHAT, WHAT THE FUCK
ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
234. WHAT AM I DOING,
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
235. WHAT THE FUCK,
I'M TRYING TO WALK HERE.Copy !req
236. WHAT WHILE YOU'RE
TALKING ON A CELL PHONE?Copy !req
237. YOU ALMOST FUCKIN'
KILLED ME, YOU DOUCHE BAG!Copy !req
238. YOU CUT RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME,
YOU'RE TALKING ON A CELLPHONE?Copy !req
239. WHAT, THERE'S A LAW AGAINST
TALKING ON A CELLPHONE?Copy !req
240. NO, YOU CAN'T, NOT WHILE
YOU'RE WHEELING AROUND.Copy !req
241. YOU ALMOST HIT MY CAR.Copy !req
242. I'M JUST TRYING TO GET
MY CAR, YOU FUCKIN'--Copy !req
243. TO DRIVE THAT THING.Copy !req
244. PISS OFF,
YOU DOUCHE BAG.Copy !req
245. OH, ASSHOLE.Copy !req
246. YOU FUCKIN' PUSSY,
PISS OFF!Copy !req
247. HEY, LOOK AT THIS.Copy !req
248. YEAH?Copy !req
249. WOW, THERE'S
MONEY IN HERE.Copy !req
250. LARRY DAVID,
JEFF GREENE TO SEE MEL.Copy !req
251. HE'LL BE WITH YOU
IN A SECOND, HAVE A SEAT.Copy !req
252. YOU KNOW WHAT, I FOUND
THIS THING IN THE LOBBY.Copy !req
253. OH.Copy !req
254. I DON'T KNOW
WHAT THE DEAL IS.Copy !req
255. UH, ACTUALLY THIS
BELONGS TO DENNIS.Copy !req
256. IN THE BUILDING.Copy !req
257. CHAIR THIS MORNING OR SOMETHING.Copy !req
258. CHAIR?Copy !req
259. YEAH, HE'S
IN A WHEELCHAIR.Copy !req
260. I'LL BET THAT'S THE GUY,
YOU KNOW THAT?Copy !req
261. IN THE PARKING LOT.Copy !req
262. I ALMOST HIT HIM.Copy !req
263. ON HIS CELLPHONE.Copy !req
264. YEAH, WELL, HE'S IN A,
HE'S IN A WHEELCHAIR.Copy !req
265. YEAH, I KNOW,
IT'S A MOVING VEHICLE.Copy !req
266. THERE'S GOT TO BE SOME KINDCopy !req
267. IN ELECTRIC CHAIRS.Copy !req
268. MM-HMM.Copy !req
269. HE'S MOTORING ALONG.Copy !req
270. YOU DON'T NEED TO BE
TALKING ON A CELLPHONE.Copy !req
271. IT'S DANGEROUS.Copy !req
272. MEL WILL BE RIGHT OUT.Copy !req
273. NAMES FOR BABIES,
IS THAT YOU?Copy !req
274. YES, ACTUALLY MY PARTNER AND I
ARE ADOPTING A BABY.Copy !req
275. A PARTNER.Copy !req
276. I GOT A WIFE.Copy !req
277. MM.Copy !req
278. NOT EXACTLY A PARTNER.Copy !req
279. MORE LIKE A RIVAL,
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?Copy !req
280. IT'S A RIVALRY.Copy !req
281. THIS IS MY PARTNER.Copy !req
282. SO LET ME ASK YOU, YOU GOT ANY,
YOU GOT ANY NAMES PICKED OUT?Copy !req
283. UH, ACTUALLY WE DO.Copy !req
284. IS IT, UH, A BOY
OR WHAT ARE YOU...Copy !req
285. IT'S A BOY.Copy !req
286. UH, AND WE ARE
ADOPTING HIM FROM CHINA.Copy !req
287. AH, ADOPTING FROM CHINA.Copy !req
288. MM-HMM.Copy !req
289. CHINESE NAMES, DO I KNOW
ANY CHINESE NAMES?Copy !req
290. WELL YOU GOT, UH...Copy !req
291. FROM THE GOOD EARTH.Copy !req
292. REMEMBER WANG LUNG?Copy !req
293. WANG ISN'T A BAD
FIRST NAME.Copy !req
294. WANG?Copy !req
295. THE WHOLE ANG FAMILY.Copy !req
296. FANG, BANG, TANG.Copy !req
297. BECAUSE IT'S LIKE CHINA
BUT IT'S, IT'S NOT CHINA.Copy !req
298. IT'S A JUICE
IS WHAT IT IS.Copy !req
299. TANG.Copy !req
300. A KID AFTER A JUICE?Copy !req
301. MAYBE THAT'S NOT SO BAD.Copy !req
302. OVERTONES, TANG.Copy !req
303. BUT YET THERE'S A...Copy !req
304. TANG.Copy !req
305. JOLT WITH IT.Copy !req
306. MM-HMM, YEAH.Copy !req
307. I DON'T THINK THAT WOULD GO OVER
TOO WELL WITH THE SCHOOL KIDS.Copy !req
308. UH, THAT'S GONNA BE
THE LEAST OF HIS PROBLEMS, NO?Copy !req
309. RIGHT WITH YOU.Copy !req
310. YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M GONNA
RUN TO THE BATHROOM.Copy !req
311. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.Copy !req
312. OH, OH, OOH!Copy !req
313. OH MY GOD, WHAT—Copy !req
314. LARRY,
LARRY DAVID.Copy !req
315. OH MY GOD.Copy !req
316. OOH, DID I HURT YOU?
I'M SO SORRY.Copy !req
317. IS IT BAD?Copy !req
318. IS IT BAD?Copy !req
319. NO, NO, IT'LL
BE ALRIGHT.Copy !req
320. IS IT BAD?Copy !req
321. NO, I GOT TO GET, UH,
LET ME GET SOME HELP.Copy !req
322. IS IT BAD?Copy !req
323. DON'T MOVE, DON'T MOVE.Copy !req
324. HURRY UP.Copy !req
325. HI, JEFF GREENE, I'M A PATIENT
OF DR. MORRISON'S.Copy !req
326. LARRY DAVID.Copy !req
327. OH YEAH.Copy !req
328. WILL BE WITH YOU IN A MINUTE.Copy !req
329. OH.Copy !req
330. WELL, DO I ACTUALLY HAVE
TO PUT MY NAME ON THIS THING?Copy !req
331. YES.Copy !req
332. YEAH.Copy !req
333. I GENERALLY DON'T LIKE TO PUT MY
NAME ON THESE LISTS, YOU KNOW.Copy !req
334. PEOPLE COME IN,
THEY SEE YOUR NAME.Copy !req
335. JUST, JUST SIGN IN.Copy !req
336. JUST SIGN IN.Copy !req
337. I DON'T LIKE HAVING
MY NAME ON THESE LISTS.Copy !req
338. THEN SIGN BEN VEREEN.Copy !req
339. YOU SIGN, COME ON.Copy !req
340. YOUR HEAD'S BLEEDING,
JUST SIGN IN!Copy !req
341. AH.Copy !req
342. HELLO.Copy !req
343. DUDE.Copy !req
344. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
345. What?Copy !req
346. ON THE DOCTOR'S PHONE FOR?Copy !req
347. I'M BORED
TO DEATH IN HERE.Copy !req
348. DON'T USE THE DOCTOR'S PHONE,
THAT'S NOT RIGHT.Copy !req
349. Why, what's
the big deal?Copy !req
350. THEY DON'T LIKE IT.Copy !req
351. WELL, I JUST THOUGHT
I'D GIVE YOU A CALL,Copy !req
352. SEE WHAT'S UP,
HOW YOU'RE DOING?Copy !req
353. What are you reading?Copy !req
354. "MEN'S FITNESS."Copy !req
355. "Men's Fitness" ?Copy !req
356. YEAH, ABOUT AMERICA'S
FATTEST CITIES.Copy !req
357. OH, YOU KNOW WHAT,
THERE'S THE DOCTOR.Copy !req
358. ALRIGHT, I'LL TALK
TO YOU LATER.Copy !req
359. I WILL, UH,
I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER.Copy !req
360. THAT WAS JEFF.Copy !req
361. YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED
TO USE THAT PHONE.Copy !req
362. SORRY.Copy !req
363. IT WAS A LOCAL CALL.Copy !req
364. YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED
TO USE THE PHONE.Copy !req
365. IT DOESN'T MATTER WHETHER IT WAS
A LOCAL OR A LONG DISTANCE CALL.Copy !req
366. WE JUST DON'T WANT PEOPLE
USING THAT PHONE, OKAY.Copy !req
367. FINE, WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL
THOUGH, UH, IF I MAY ASK.Copy !req
368. WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?Copy !req
369. THERE IS NO PROBLEM.Copy !req
370. WE JUST DON'T WANT PEOPLE
USING THAT PHONE.Copy !req
371. I DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHY NOT THOUGH.Copy !req
372. WHY COULDN'T
I USE IT?Copy !req
373. WELL, YOU COULD USE IT,
YOU OBVIOUSLY DID.Copy !req
374. WE DON'T WANT YOU
TO USE IT THOUGH.Copy !req
375. I JUST DON'T REALLY
UNDERSTAND THE RULE.Copy !req
376. I DON'T SEE
WHAT THE BIG DEAL IS.Copy !req
377. IS SO COMPLEX THAT I WON'T
EVEN BORE YOU WITH IT.Copy !req
378. WE DON'T ALLOW ANYONE TO USECopy !req
379. THE EXAMINATION ROOMS.Copy !req
380. YEAH, I MEAN, I JUST DON'T
SEE HOW IT'S HURTING ANYBODY.Copy !req
381. IT'S NOT, IT'S NOT
HURTING ANYBODY.Copy !req
382. WE JUST HAVE A RULE HERE, YOU
DON'T USE THE DOCTOR'S PHONE.Copy !req
383. IT'S SIMPLE.Copy !req
384. YEAH, I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHAT THE REASON IS.Copy !req
385. I MEAN, YOU'RE SAYING NOT TO USE
IT, BUT WHAT'S THE REASON?Copy !req
386. I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY YOU
HAVE TO KNOW THE REASON.Copy !req
387. I'M JUST TRYING TO UNDERSTAND
WHY YOU DECIDED THAT.Copy !req
388. CAPRICIOUS TO ME.Copy !req
389. YOU KNOW, IT'S HARDCopy !req
390. THE CONTINGENCIES.Copy !req
391. DON'T USE THE PHONE.Copy !req
392. OKAY.Copy !req
393. UNDERSTOOD.Copy !req
394. ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT,
GLAD YOU UNDERSTAND IT.Copy !req
395. TO YOU?Copy !req
396. LET'S HAVE A LOOK.Copy !req
397. I GOT HIT BY A DOOR.Copy !req
398. WOW, SIT DOWN,
WILL YOU?Copy !req
399. OUT OF A BATHROOM AND HE,Copy !req
400. A SWINGING DOOR HIT ME.Copy !req
401. YEAH, MEL BROOKS, HUH?Copy !req
402. YEAH.Copy !req
403. YEAH, IS IT
THE MEL BROOKS?Copy !req
404. THE FUNNY GUY, YEAH.Copy !req
405. I LIKE MEL BROOKS,
I'M A BIG FAN OF HIS.Copy !req
406. LAY DOWN, WILL YOU?Copy !req
407. YEAH, HE'S GREAT.Copy !req
408. ON THE PILLOW.Copy !req
409. YEAH, I HAVE TICKETS
FOR HIS PLAY "THE PRODUCERS".Copy !req
410. OH REALLY?Copy !req
411. YEAH.Copy !req
412. OH YEAH,
I HEAR IT'S GREAT.Copy !req
413. SO DO I.Copy !req
414. BOY THIS IS, UH,
KIND OF A NASTY CUT.Copy !req
415. ALRIGHT, I THINK ALL WE HAVECopy !req
416. AND, UH, PUT IN
A FEW STITCHES.Copy !req
417. OH REALLY?Copy !req
418. MM-HMM.Copy !req
419. OH, OKAY.Copy !req
420. AGAIN I'M SORRY ABOUT
THE, UH, THE PHONE STUFF.Copy !req
421. OH, IT'S OKAY,
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.Copy !req
422. JUST, UM, IF YOU'RE EVER
IN A DOCTOR'S OFFICE AGAIN,Copy !req
423. DON'T USE THE PHONE.Copy !req
424. YEAH, IT JUST SEEMS LIKE
AN ODD POLICY TO ME THOUGH.Copy !req
425. MM-HMM, IT'S A RULECopy !req
426. IN EXAMINATION ROOMS,
YOU DON'T USE THE PHONE.Copy !req
427. YEAH, I UNDERSTAND.Copy !req
428. IT'S JUST THAT THE RULE DOESN'T
MAKE ANY SENSE, THAT'S ALL.Copy !req
429. WELL, IT MAKES
SENSE TO US.Copy !req
430. OKAY, FINE.Copy !req
431. WE DON'T HAVE MANY RULES HERE,
THAT'S ONE OF THEM.Copy !req
432. THAT IF YOU'RE MAKINGCopy !req
433. WOULD CARE, BUT WHATEVER.Copy !req
434. WELL, IT'S NOT THE EXPENSE OF
THE CALL WE'RE CONCERNED ABOUT.Copy !req
435. NOW, I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'VE
EVER HAD STITCHES BEFORE,Copy !req
436. BIT OF PAIN INVOLVED.Copy !req
437. REALLY THAN A LITTLE PRICK.Copy !req
438. MM-HMM.Copy !req
439. YEAH, IT IS DEFINITELY
A PRICK INVOLVED.Copy !req
440. UH, YES, THERE IS
A PRICK INVOLVED.Copy !req
441. YEAH, THERE'S
ONE PRICK INVOLVED.Copy !req
442. YEAH, I WOULD SAY THERE
IS ONE PRICK INVOLVED.Copy !req
443. I AGREE, I'M NOT A DOCTOR,
BUT I AGREE THERE IS ONE PRICK.Copy !req
444. YEP.Copy !req
445. I THINK THIS IS PRETTY MINOR.Copy !req
446. OH OH,
WHAT THE HELL?Copy !req
447. YOU DROOLED ON ME!Copy !req
448. 10th ANNIVERSARY PRESENT?Copy !req
449. THINKING ABOUT IT.Copy !req
450. AND?Copy !req
451. YOU KNOW,
I GOT THREE MONTHS.Copy !req
452. I'M GONNACopy !req
453. AND WAIT, WAIT FOR
THE RIGHT ONE.Copy !req
454. AND YOU, MY FAT FRIEND,
WILL BE THE FIRST TO KNOW.Copy !req
455. ALRIGHT, GOOD,
I SHOULD BE.Copy !req
456. MY BIG FAT FRIEND.Copy !req
457. MM, FATSO.Copy !req
458. YEAH, FATSO.Copy !req
459. OH, HEY.Copy !req
460. DID YOU GET
YOUR WALLET?Copy !req
461. YEAH, HOW DID YOU
KNOW ABOUT THAT?Copy !req
462. I FOUND IT.Copy !req
463. WAIT A MINUTE, YOU'RE
THE GUY FROM THE CAR.Copy !req
464. YEAH.Copy !req
465. IN MEL BROOKS' OFFICE.Copy !req
466. YEAH RIGHT, RIGHT,
I GAVE IT TO HER.Copy !req
467. THAT'S NOT
WHAT SHE SAID.Copy !req
468. WAIT A SECOND, SHE SAID
SHE FOUND THAT WALLET?Copy !req
469. YES.Copy !req
470. THAT'S AN EXACT QUOTE,
"I FOUND THIS" ?Copy !req
471. 100 BUCKS.Copy !req
472. AND YOU KNOW WHAT, SERIOUSLY YOUCopy !req
473. ON YOUR DRIVING SKILLS, BUDDY.Copy !req
474. HELLO.Copy !req
475. LARRY DAVID TO SEE MEL.Copy !req
476. OKAY.Copy !req
477. YOU KNOW, I RAN INTO THE GUY
IN THE WHEELCHAIR DOWNSTAIRS,Copy !req
478. YOUR FRIEND, DENNIS.Copy !req
479. THAT YOU FOUND THE WALLET?Copy !req
480. $100 REWARD?Copy !req
481. WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?Copy !req
482. COME IN HERE...Copy !req
483. HOW DARE I?Copy !req
484. HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON?Copy !req
485. THAT I TOLD YOU ABOUT.Copy !req
486. OH, YOU GOT A PROBLEMCopy !req
487. TO ADOPT A BABY?Copy !req
488. NO, NOT AT ALL.Copy !req
489. YEAH. YOU NEED A GOOD
FUCKIN' ASS KICKING.Copy !req
490. THAT'S WHAT YOU NEED!Copy !req
491. OUR BABY TANG?Copy !req
492. YOU THINK IT'S GOOD TO NAME
A KID AFTER A BREAKFAST DRINK?Copy !req
493. WE DON'T THINK
THAT'S A GOOD NAME!Copy !req
494. DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?Copy !req
495. I UNDERSTAND.Copy !req
496. DAMN FUCKING RIGHT!Copy !req
497. YOU APOLOGIZE TO HER,
YOU APOLOGIZE NOW!Copy !req
498. I'M SORRY,
OKAY, SORRY, SORRY.Copy !req
499. DOING HERE ANYWAY?Copy !req
500. WITH MEL BROOKS.Copy !req
501. WELL, YOU'RE HERE.Copy !req
502. YOU CAME.Copy !req
503. YES.Copy !req
504. AND I GUESS YOU'RE WONDERING
WHY I CALLED YOU.Copy !req
505. KIND OF, YEAH.Copy !req
506. AND THEN YOU GOT UP?Copy !req
507. YEAH, HE WAS GREAT.Copy !req
508. PRETTY WILD FOR ME.Copy !req
509. AND THEN YOU SANG "SWANNEE"
AND THEY WENT CRAZY.Copy !req
510. I WAS ABSOLUTELY FLOORED.Copy !req
511. I MEAN, I,Copy !req
512. REALLY?Copy !req
513. NO, NO, I COULDN'T
GET OVER IT.Copy !req
514. AND BANG, BANG
SOMETHING WENT OFF IN ME.Copy !req
515. CALLED MAX BIALYSTOCK,Copy !req
516. IN "THE PRODUCERS".Copy !req
517. I WANT YOU, LARRY DAVID,Copy !req
518. MAX BIALYSTOCK ON BROADWAY.Copy !req
519. THE LEAD IN "THE PRODUCERS".Copy !req
520. I'M NEVER WRONG.Copy !req
521. THE GUY...Copy !req
522. I, I, I DON'T,
I MEAN, I'M...Copy !req
523. I DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO SAY, I'M...Copy !req
524. WEREN'T YOU GREAT?Copy !req
525. HE WAS GREAT.Copy !req
526. BUT NO, I MEAN,
YOU KNOW, A BROADWAY SHOW.Copy !req
527. I'M NOT, LIKE
A THEATER ACTOR, UH...Copy !req
528. "THE PRODUCERS", THE GUY THATCopy !req
529. INCREDIBLE TALENTED GREEK ACTOR.Copy !req
530. HIS NAME IS ANDREAS,
ANDREAS VOUTSINAS.Copy !req
531. TO SAY TO ME...Copy !req
532. "OR YOU GOT IT
OR YOU AIN'T."Copy !req
533. I SAID, ANDREAS, YOU CAN'T
START A SENTENCE WITH "OR".Copy !req
534. HE SAID NEVER MIND.Copy !req
535. "OR YOU GOT IT
OR YOU AIN'T."Copy !req
536. YOU GOT IT, LARRY.Copy !req
537. YOU GOT IT, LARRY.Copy !req
538. YOU GOT IT, MISTER.Copy !req
539. MR. BROOKS IS RIGHT,
MY FRIEND, YOU GOT IT.Copy !req
540. OH, BY THE WAY BEN STILLER WILL
BE TAKING OVER AT THE SAME TIME.Copy !req
541. AND BEN STILLER.Copy !req
542. I GOT A GREAT IDEA.Copy !req
543. GO TO THE SHOW TONIGHT,
SEE THE SHOW.Copy !req
544. LET IT GET INTO YOU PORES,
LET IT GET INTO YOUR SYSTEM.Copy !req
545. I'M TELLING YOU
I'M NEVER WRONG.Copy !req
546. I AM NEVER WRONG.Copy !req
547. CRAZY TO YOU.Copy !req
548. I KNOW IT SOUNDS INSANE.Copy !req
549. IT DOESN'T SOUND
CRAZY TO ME.Copy !req
550. TO DO IT.Copy !req
551. IT SOUNDS LIKE?Copy !req
552. LIKE A JOKE.Copy !req
553. OR JAMIE KENNEDY'SCopy !req
554. THROUGH THE DOOR.Copy !req
555. TO DO IT.Copy !req
556. JUST SEE THE SHOW TONIGHT,
SEE WHAT HAPPENS.Copy !req
557. TO YOU, OKAY?Copy !req
558. YOU'RE GONNA DO IT,
IT'S GONNA HAPPEN.Copy !req
559. HE'S GOING
TO DO IT, MEL.Copy !req
560. OKAY, JEFF, TELL HIM
IN THE ELEVATOR.Copy !req
561. GREAT HE IS.Copy !req
562. GENTLEMEN, A PLEASURE,
GOOD TO MEET YOU.Copy !req
563. TAKE CARE.Copy !req
564. HIGH SCHOOL, I SWEAR TO GOD.Copy !req
565. THE LEAD EVERY ONE.Copy !req
566. OR WHAT ARE YOUR M4 AND M5,
THOSE ARE YOUR HOUSE SEATS?Copy !req
567. YEAH, LET HIM HAVE IT.Copy !req
568. HE'S GOT TO, NO,
NO, THEY'LL BE THERE.Copy !req
569. AT THE BOX OFFICE.Copy !req
570. THANK YOU.
LARRY DAVID.Copy !req
571. GIANT FUCKIN' MISTAKE
IF I SAY SO RIGHT TO YOUR FACE.Copy !req
572. OKAY, ZERO MOSTEL...Copy !req
573. YEAH, I KNOW.Copy !req
574. ZERO MOSTEL.Copy !req
575. YOU'RE GONNA SAY.Copy !req
576. NATHAN LANE, JASON ALEXANDER
AND LARRY DAVID?Copy !req
577. COME ON, MEL.Copy !req
578. TRUST ME.Copy !req
579. AND THIS TIME I KNOW.Copy !req
580. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.Copy !req
581. ALRIGHT.Copy !req
582. WHAT'S WRONG?Copy !req
583. AH, THIS THING'S
KILLING ME.Copy !req
584. YOU KNOW, I'M GONNA
TAKE A PAINKILLER I THINK.Copy !req
585. OH WAIT, I DON'T THINK
YOU SHOULD DO THAT?Copy !req
586. WHY?Copy !req
587. YOU TIRED?Copy !req
588. IT'S KILLING,
IT REALLY HURTS.Copy !req
589. TAKE IT WITHOUT WATER?Copy !req
590. I DON'T KNOW,
I'LL POP IT IN.Copy !req
591. MAYBE YOU SHOULD WAIT.Copy !req
592. OKAY, OKAY,
OKAY, LARRY.Copy !req
593. DID YOU GET IT?Copy !req
594. YEAH, I GOT IT.Copy !req
595. BEN STILLER?Copy !req
596. YEAH, I THINK THAT IS.Copy !req
597. ALRIGHT.Copy !req
598. HI.Copy !req
599. HEY, HOW ARE
YOU DOING?Copy !req
600. GOOD TO SEE YOU.Copy !req
601. NICE TO SEE YOU.Copy !req
602. HI, BEN.Copy !req
603. OH, OH GOOD
THANK YOU.Copy !req
604. NICE TO SEE YOU.Copy !req
605. YOU OKAY?Copy !req
606. YEAH, WHAT HAPPENED?Copy !req
607. WITH A BATHROOM DOOR.Copy !req
608. CUT MY HEAD.Copy !req
609. I KNOW, IT SOUNDS
LIKE A JOKE.Copy !req
610. WHAT, WERE YOU
TALKING TO HIM?Copy !req
611. I MET HIM TODAY.Copy !req
612. YEAH.Copy !req
613. OH, YOU MET HIM
TODAY, OKAY.Copy !req
614. YOU'RE DOING THE SHOW.Copy !req
615. I AM YEAH, I'M DOING
THE SHOW AND,Copy !req
616. TO HIM ABOUT MAYBE...Copy !req
617. THE MAX BIALYSTOCK.Copy !req
618. YEAH, I KNOW.Copy !req
619. SHOCKING TO ME TOO.Copy !req
620. WHAT?Copy !req
621. YOU MEAN HE OFFERED,
YOU MEAN HE ACTUALLY OFFERED...Copy !req
622. YEAH.
REALLY?Copy !req
623. OFFERED HIM THE,
I KNOW.Copy !req
624. THAT IS...Copy !req
625. TO MAKE THIS DECISION.Copy !req
626. WELL, YEAH.Copy !req
627. WELL, CAN I ASK YOU
SOMETHING, YOU ACT?Copy !req
628. NO, NO, I DON'T.Copy !req
629. YEAH, AND YOU SING?Copy !req
630. I DON'T DO
ANYTHING REALLY.Copy !req
631. I MEAN THEY'LL
HAVE TO TEACH ME.Copy !req
632. RIGHT, RIGHT.Copy !req
633. I MEAN, HE SAW
IN A KARAOKE BAR.Copy !req
634. WOW.Copy !req
635. YOU'RE FUCKING
WITH ME, RIGHT?Copy !req
636. NO, IT'S TRUE, BUT I'M
STILL THINKING ABOUT IT.Copy !req
637. I HAVEN'T MADE UP
MY MIND OR ANYTHING.Copy !req
638. YEAH, YEAH, WELL YOU
SHOULD THINK ABOUT IT.Copy !req
639. HONEY, ACTUALLY I SEE,
UH, BRIAN AND LEE.Copy !req
640. WE SHOULD GO SAY HI.Copy !req
641. BLESS YOU.Copy !req
642. GOOD TO SEE YOU,
SEE YOU LATER.Copy !req
643. HEY, WELL, WHATEVER HAPPENS
HAPPENS, RIGHT?Copy !req
644. GOOD TO SEE YOU.Copy !req
645. LAR, GOOD LUCK,
THIS IS A BIG DECISION.Copy !req
646. TAKE CARE.Copy !req
647. I'LL WATCH IT TONIGHT
AND I'LL, I'LL THINK ABOUT IT.Copy !req
648. GOOD LUCK.Copy !req
649. BEN, SO GOOD
TO SEE YOU.Copy !req
650. AND WE'LL TALK ABOUT
APARTMENTS IF YOU NEED TO.Copy !req
651. I'M SURE WE'LL ALL
GONNA BE, UH...Copy !req
652. I'LL CHECK IT OUT.Copy !req
653. OKAY, BYE.Copy !req
654. WITH YOU?Copy !req
655. TALKING ABOUT?Copy !req
656. WHY DIDN'T YOU
SHAKE HIS HAND?Copy !req
657. HE PUT HIS
HAND OUT FOR YOU.Copy !req
658. ALL OVER HIS HAND.Copy !req
659. SNEEZED ON IT.Copy !req
660. HOW RUDE IS THAT?Copy !req
661. HE DIDN'T
NOTICE ANYTHING.Copy !req
662. FOR YOU TO SHAKE IT.Copy !req
663. OF COURSE HE NOTICED THAT,
EVERYONE NOTICED THAT.Copy !req
664. I'M NOT GOING
TO SHAKE HIS HAND.Copy !req
665. OVER IT, COME ON.Copy !req
666. ALL THE WAY.Copy !req
667. WILL EVER COME BETWEEN US.Copy !req
668. NOTHING OR NO ONE, MAX.Copy !req
669. COME IN.
COME IN.Copy !req
670. I'M BACK DOWN
FROM THE PILLS.Copy !req
671. OH, ABOUT OUR 10th ANNIVERSARY
PRESENT, IT'S...Copy !req
672. ALRIGHT, IT'S FINE IF YOU
WANT TO GET OUT OF IT.Copy !req
673. NO.Copy !req
674. THINK ANY LESS OF YOU.Copy !req
675. NO, I DON'T WANT TO GET
OUT OF IT, A DEAL'S A DEAL.Copy !req
676. THERE'S A FEW GROUND RULESCopy !req
677. TO TALK ABOUT, OKAY.Copy !req
678. OKAY, RULE NUMBER ONE IS
IT'S A ONE TIME ONLY.Copy !req
679. OKAY, ONE TIME ONLY.Copy !req
680. AND THERE'S A DEADLINE.Copy !req
681. IT'S OUR ANNIVERSARY AT MIDNIGHT
AND THEN IT'S OVER.Copy !req
682. YEAH, KIND OF LIKE
CINDERELLA.Copy !req
683. AND BY THE WAY...Copy !req
684. YEAH.Copy !req
685. THIS SHOW ON BROADWAY?Copy !req
686. YEAH.Copy !req
687. NIGHT AS OUR ANNIVERSARY.Copy !req
688. REALLY?Copy !req
689. THAT WOULD BE FUN.Copy !req
690. WHAT DO YOU THINK?Copy !req
691. TO DO THE SHOW?Copy !req
692. YOU KNOW MAYBE I WILL.Copy !req
693. MAYBE I WILL.Copy !req
694. Captions Copyright 2003
HOME BOX OFFICE, INC.Copy !req
695. Captioned byCopy !req