1. y
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2. A Division of TIME WARNER
ENTERTAINMENT COMPANY, L.P.
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3. LARRY DAVID?
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4. HI, PHIL DUNLAP, HERE FOR
THE CHEF'S POSITION.
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5. HI.
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6. THANK YOU,
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
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7. AH.
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8. AH, HEY, HEY,
LOOK AT YOU.
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9. LOOK AT YOU.
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10. YEAH, LOOK AT YOU.
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11. WOW.
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12. START LOSING IT?
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13. WHEN I WAS 15.
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14. 15, WOW, EARLIER
THAN ME, YEAH.
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15. YEAH, A LITTLE
BIT EARLIER.
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16. WELL, I ACTUALLY
LIKE IT.
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17. AH, YEAH, ME TOO.
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18. SUNSCREEN ON AND IT'S FINE.
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19. YEAH, A LOT OF
SUNSCREEN, RIGHT?
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20. YEAH, YOU CAN'T GO OUTSIDE
WITHOUT THE SUNSCREEN.
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21. NO CONVERTIBLES.
NO CONVERTIBLES.
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22. OH, GOD, I HATE THAT.
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23. OH, ABSOLUTELY.
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24. 'CAUSE YOU HAVE
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25. IF YOU'RE GONNA BE
IN A CONVERTIBLE.
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26. YOU'RE TRYING TO HIDE SOMETHING.
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27. OH, WELL,
THAT'S WHAT THEY DO,
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28. THESE GUYS WITH THE HATS,
DON'T THEY?
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29. ALL THE TIME.
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30. AND THEY'LL MEET A GIRL
OR SOMETHING.
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31. AND THEN THEY'LL
SHOW UP ON A DATE.
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32. WHAT ARE THEY GONNA DO,
THEY'RE GONNA TAKE THE HAT OFF,
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33. WHERE IT, THEY HAVE
A TERRIBLE DECISION...
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34. RIGHT, RIGHT, THEN
THE GIRL'S GONNA BE, LIKE,
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35. I DIDN'T KNOW
YOU WERE BALD.
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36. EXACTLY.
YOURSELF.
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37. RIGHT, YEAH.
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38. NONOXINOL?
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39. NO, YOU?
NO.
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40. OH, MY GOD,
THE DROPS AND EVERYTHING,
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41. TO MASSAGE IT IN.
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42. THERE'S SOMETHING
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43. WRONG WITH THEM,
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44. THE TRANSPLANT PEOPLE?
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45. HUH?
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46. I HATE THOSE PEOPLE.
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47. TOUPEE?
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48. NO.
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49. OH, NO, ABSOLUTELY NOT.
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50. THOSE GUYS, THEY SHOULD
KILL THOSE GUYS.
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51. EXACTLY.
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52. I'M SURPRISED HITLER DIDN'T
ROUND UP THE TOUPEE PEOPLE.
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53. I MEAN, IF I'M GOING
TO BE A SICK MEGALOMANIAC.
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54. TO ROUND UP PEOPLE WHO I HATED,
THEY WOULD BE ON MY LIST.
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55. GET THE TOUPEE PEOPLE.
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56. ABSOLUTELY.
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57. I'D HAVE MY HENCHMEN
GOING AROUND,
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58. PEOPLE'S HAIR.
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59. IF IT COMES OFF...
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60. BALDEN, COME WITH ME.
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61. AH, BALDEN.
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62. MY FAULT.
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63. THE WHOLE TIME.
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64. NO, NO, NO, IT WAS MY FAULT,
I OVERREACTED, AND...
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65. WE WERE ALL CRAZY.
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66. NO, IF I HADN'T TOLD
MINDY REISER THAT THING.
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67. TO NEW TIMES,
GOOD FRIENDS.
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68. BACK ON TRACK.
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69. THE BRIDGE.
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70. GOOD, GOOD.
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71. IT'S GOOD
TO SEE YOU GUYS.
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72. HOW'S, BY THE WAY...
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73. DOES THAT BOTHER ANYBODY,
WHEN I MAKE A NOISE LIKE THAT?
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74. DISTURBED BY THAT?
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75. WHY, AND WHY SHOULD YOU BE,
WHAT IS IT, SO WHAT?
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76. SO, HOW IS
EVERYTHING GOING?
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77. HOW ARE THE KIDS,
HOW'S THE HOUSE?
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78. GOOD, OH, JAKEY'S
DRIVING US NUTS THOUGH.
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79. HE'S ALWAYS WANTED A DOG,
AND WE KEEP PUTTING HIM OFF.
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80. HE WANTS A DOG, WE CAN'T
PUT HIM OFF ANYMORE.
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81. NO FREAKING PUPPY.
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82. YOU KNOW, I DON'T
WANT THE PEEING,
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83. I DON'T WANT
THE CHEWING.
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84. I WANT A GOOD, SMART,
TRAINED DOG.
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85. JEFF'S GOT THAT
GERMAN SHEPHERD.
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86. OH, RIGHT.
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87. THEY'RE LOOKING
TO GET RID—
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88. OH MY GOD, THIS WOULD
BE PERFECT FOR YOU.
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89. HOW OLD IS THE DOG?
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90. HE'S, I DON'T KNOW,
MAYBE FOUR.
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91. WHEN I WAS A LITTLE BOY.
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92. YEAH, YEAH.
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93. TALKING ABOUT HIM.
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94. YOU CAN'T
BELIEVE THIS DOG.
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95. IT'S A CORPSE-SNIFFING DOG.
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96. THE FIRE DEPARTMENT.
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97. A WHAT?
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98. IT'S A CORPSE-SNIFFING?
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99. I'M TELLING YOU,
THIS IS AN AMAZING DOG.
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100. WHAT'S HIS NAME?
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101. OSCAR.
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102. OSCAR.
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103. OSCAR.
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104. WHAT HAPPENED WAS,
THEY SEPARATED, AND, UH...
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105. JEFF AND HIS WIFE.
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106. AND WAS WORRIED, SO SHE GOT
A DOG FOR SECURITY, AND...
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107. AND SHE GOT A SHEPHERD.
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108. RIGHT, AND NOW...
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109. WELL, NOW THEY RECONCILED
AND HE'S MOVED BACK,
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110. BUT HE'S ALLERGIC
TO THE DOG,
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111. AND HE'S SNIFFING
AND SNEEZING ALL THE TIME,
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112. AND HE'S A WRECK.
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113. BUT THE DOG
IS SO GREAT.
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114. I MEAN, IT'S LIKE HAVING
A PERSON THERE WHO BARKS.
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115. EVERYTHING.
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116. HOW'S THE DOG
WITH KIDS?
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117. GREAT, THEY HAVE
A LITTLE GIRL.
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118. BUT THE DOG IS
FABULOUS WITH HER.
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119. WOULDN'T HURT A FLY.
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120. SOUNDS PERFECT.
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121. YOU KNOW WHAT,
HOW DO WE DO THIS,
HOW DO WE DO THIS?
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122. ALRIGHT, SO,
YOU'RE INTERESTED?
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123. ABSOLUTELY.
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124. YES, YES, VERY.
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125. ABSOLUTELY PERFECT.
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126. IT'S JUST LIKE AN ELEPHANT
STICKING HIS HEAD IN A POND.
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127. WATCHING?
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128. THIS ROUTINE.
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129. STOP IT.
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130. MM-MM.
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131. NO, I'M SORRY, NO.
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132. THE CORK IS DRY.
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133. THIS BACK.
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134. WHAT?
DON'T SEND THIS BACK.
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135. YOU DON'T EVEN
HAVE TO TASTE IT.
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136. YOU KNOW WHAT,
JUST GO TELL THE MANAGER.
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137. HAVE HIM TASTE IT,
AN ACTUAL BORDEAUX GLASS.
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138. POUR SOME FOR ME?
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139. YOU CAN'T SEND
THIS BACK.
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140. YOU'RE AN EXPERT IN WINE,
GO AHEAD, GO AHEAD, TASTE IT.
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141. LARRY, COME ON.
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142. FINE.
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143. IT'S FINE,
IT'S DELICIOUS.
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144. AT $140 A BOTTLE,
I DON'T WANT FINE.
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145. LARRY COULDN'T POSSIBLY
TELL THAT THESE...
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146. NO, LARRY, LARRY,
COME ON, YOU CAN'T.
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147. TO KNOW...
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148. IT'S NOT A MATTER
OF SOPHISTICATION,
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149. IT'S A DELICATE THING.
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150. LOOK, YOU DON'T HAVE
TO DRINK IT.
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151. YOU DON'T HAVE
TO DRINK IT.
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152. WE'LL ORDER
SOMETHING ELSE.
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153. I'LL GET YOU
A NICE SPRITZER.
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154. A SPRITZER.
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155. THAT'S GREAT.
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156. DIDN'T I SAY LAST TIME
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157. I WASN'T GONNA
HAVE DESSERT?
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158. SO, WHAT'S GOING ON
WITH YOUR RESTAURANT?
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159. YOU HAVEN'T
SAID A WORD.
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160. THANK YOU FOR ASKING.
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161. I'M NOT REALLY ALLOWED
TO TALK ABOUT IT.
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162. SHE DOESN'T
REALLY LIKE IT,
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163. SHE'S BORED WITH
RESTAURANT TALK.
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164. NO, YOU TELL IT.
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165. YOU KNOW, WHEN I WAS
ON "SEINFELD"
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166. I WASN'T ALLOWED
TO TALK ABOUT "SEINFELD".
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167. I'M NOT ALLOWED TO TALK ABOUT
ANYTHING I'M DOING, YOU KNOW.
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168. I BORE HER,
SHE BORES SO EASILY.
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169. WE'RE OPENING
NEXT WEEK.
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170. THIS NEW CHEF WE GOT,
HE'S GONNA BE FANTASTIC.
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171. GREAT, WHERE
DID YOU FIND HIM?
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172. OKAY, LARRY ONLY LIKES HIM
BECAUSE HE'S BALD.
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173. NO, THAT'S
TRUE BECAUSE...
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174. THAT, CHERYL, WHY?
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175. BECAUSE HE TOLD ME, HE GOES,
I FOUND THIS GUY, HE'S GREAT.
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176. HE'S BALD.
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177. DON'T SAY THAT,
THAT'S NOT TRUE.
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178. IS THAT?
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179. OH, YEAH, I HIRED,
YEAH, I DID HIRE A BALD MAN.
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180. BECAUSE HE'S BALD.
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181. NO, NO, NO, NO,
NO, NO, NO.
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182. NO, NO, NO,
NO SPLITTING.
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183. NO SPLITTING.
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184. THE LAST ONE.
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185. DON'T YOU HAVE TO GO
TO THE BATHROOM?
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186. HUH?
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187. YEAH, I GOT TO GO
TO THE BATHROOM, RIGHT.
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188. GO TO THE BATHROOM,
GO TO THE BATHROOM.
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189. THANK YOU, STU.
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190. ANYWAY, THANKS STU, THAT'S VERY
NICE OF YOU, THANK YOU.
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191. YOU'RE WELCOME.
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192. WHAT ABOUT ME,
YOU GONNA THANK ME TOO?
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193. AND THANK YOU, SUSAN.
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194. YOU'RE WELCOME.
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195. TO THANK YOU?
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196. FOR DINNER.
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197. AND I TREATED YOU TO.
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198. OH, I THOUGHT
HE TREATED ME TO IT.
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199. AND PUT IT DOWN, YES.
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200. YEAH.
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201. SO, I THANKED HIM.
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202. AND HE'S USING OUR MONEY
TO PAY FOR IT.
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203. SO, YOU COULD THANK US,
WE'RE TAKING YOU OUT TO DINNER.
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204. WELL, YOU CAN
CALL IT OUR MONEY,
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205. OF DISCUSSION,
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206. HE'S THE ONE WHO GOES TO WORK
AND THEN EARNS THE MONEY.
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207. YOU DON'T WORK.
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208. ALRIGHT, WHAT ABOUT,
CHERYL?
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209. YOU DON'T
WORK YOURSELF.
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210. IN YOUR HOUSE?
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211. HONEY, IT'S OUR MONEY.
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212. NO, IT'S NOT.
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213. I'VE EARNED
THE MONEY.
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214. OH, SO, WHAT DO YOU DO,
YOU PAY HER A SALARY?
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215. SHE BUY THINGS?
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216. THAT I'VE EARNED.
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217. SHE DIDN'T WORK,
I EARNED THE MONEY.
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218. IS MY JOB, LARRY.
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219. I EARNED THE MONEY,
IT'S JUST A FACT.
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220. STU, IS IT OUR,
IT'S OUR MONEY.
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221. OUR MONEY.
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222. I, YOU KNOW,
AND, UH...
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223. RIGHT?
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224. HE WORKS,
HE GETS THE MONEY.
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225. AND IT BECOMES...
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226. IT'S NOT THEIR MONEY,
IT'S MY MONEY.
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227. IT'S NOT ABOUT WHERE
IT'S COMING FROM,
IT'S WHAT IT BECOMES.
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228. NO, IT'S COMPLETELY ABOUT
WHERE IT'S COMING FROM.
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229. THAT'S WHAT IT'S ABOUT,
WHERE DOES IT COME FROM?
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230. WELL, I MUST SAY
THAT I AM JUST GLAD THAT,
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231. IN MY MARRIAGE,
THAT'S NOT AN ISSUE.
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232. THAT STU CONSIDERS IT...
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233. IT'S NOT AN ISSUE
IN OUR MARRIAGE EITHER.
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234. IT'S JUST A FACT OF
WHERE THE MONEY CAME FROM.
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235. HAVIN' A GREAT,
I'M SO GLAD TO SEE YOU GUYS.
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236. I'M JUST SO HAPPY
TO SEE YOU.
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237. THIS IS NICE.
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238. HEY, YOU KNOW ME,
I DON'T LIKE TO COMPLAIN.
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239. OH, YEAH, YES, YES.
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240. WELL ENOUGH TO KNOW THAT BY NOW.
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241. WHAT?
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242. HOW COME THERE'S NO PARTITIONS
IN THE BATHROOM,
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243. BETWEEN THE URINALS?
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244. HERE?
YEAH.
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245. I DON'T KNOW.
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246. GONNA HAVE THAT.
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247. DO WE HAVE,
IS IT IMPORTANT?
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248. I MEAN,
IT LOOKS NICE NOW.
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249. WE WANT A LITTLE PEE PRIVACY,
DO WE NOT?
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250. I'M ABSOLUTELY
WITH YOU.
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251. YOU DON'T WANT SOMEONE
LOOKING DOWN AT YOUR THING.
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252. THIS ISN'T A BUS STATION,
I MEAN, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
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253. KIND OF CROWD, BUT...
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254. RESTAURANT, LARRY?
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255. TO THE SIDE.
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256. YOU KNOW, THEY'VE GOT
THE 45 DEGREE ANGLE THINGS.
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257. IMPORTANT, LARRY?
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258. YES, MICHAEL,
IT IS IMPORTANT, YES.
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259. HUH?
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260. ALRIGHT, SO WE'LL HAVE IT,
WE'LL GET THEM.
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261. I STAND CORRECTED.
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262. THEY CALLED?
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263. SPLASH GUARDS.
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264. GUYS, WE CAN'T
GET IT IN TIME.
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265. WE OPEN IN THREE DAYS.
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266. WE CAN'T POSSIBLY
FIXED IN THREE DAYS.
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267. SO, WE'LL PEE AT HOME
FOR A WHILE BEFORE WE COME.
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268. HEY, EVERYBODY.
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269. WHO'S THIS?
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270. IT'S OSCAR.
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271. MY FAMILY'S DOG,
NOT MY DOG.
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272. THIS DOG KILLS ME,
I'M SO ALLERGIC TO IT.
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273. 'CAUSE SUSIE'S GOT SOME STUFF
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274. AT THE NEW HOUSE.
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275. IF YOU'RE ALLERGIC,
WHY DO YOU HAVE THE DOG?
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276. SEPARATED FOR A WHILE,
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277. AND WHILE WE WERE SEPARATED,
SHE GOT THIS DOG,
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278. AND NOW, I'M BACK AND THE DOG
AIN'T GOING ANYWHERE.
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279. YEAH, I WANT TO TALK
TO YOU ABOUT THAT.
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280. DON'T TOUCH YOUR EYES,
LIKE, DON'T...
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281. I'M NOT TOUCHING
ANYTHING.
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282. WHAT'S THE MATTER?
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283. WHAT ARE YOU DOING,
OSCAR?
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284. OSCAR!
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285. HEY, WHAT'S WRONG
WITH IT?
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286. REALLY ACTING UP.
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287. NOT IN THE KITCHEN.
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288. WHAT ARE YOU DOING,
OSCAR?
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289. WHAT'S HE GOT?
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290. SOME MEAT OR SOMETHING?
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291. NO, THAT FLOOR IS SPOTLESS
FOR THE HEALTH INSPECTION.
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292. WELL, LOOKS LIKE
HE SMELLS SOMETHING.
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293. ISN'T HE
A CORPSE-SNIFFING DOG?
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294. WELL, FOLKS.
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295. IS WELL-CREDENTIALED,
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296. AND I THINK THERE'S
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297. THAT THERE'S A DEAD BODY
UNDERNEATH THAT FLOOR.
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298. AN INVESTIGATION,
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299. AND WE'LL HAVE
TO TEAR UP THE FLOOR.
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300. OH, COME ON,
THAT'S RIDICULOUS.
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301. THAT TAKE?
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302. I DON'T KNOW.
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303. OH, THIS IS
A NIGHTMARE.
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304. I'M TELLING YOU, I'M GONNA TAKE
MY MONEY OUT OF THIS PLACE.
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305. WELL, WHAT IF THERE'S
A DEAD BODY UNDER THERE?
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306. WE'RE FUCKED, NO ONE WILL
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307. A DEAD BODY.
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308. IT'LL BE IN THE PAPERS,
WE'RE FUCKED.
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309. IF THERE'S A DEAD BODY
UNDERNEATH THERE,
WE ARE FUCKED.
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310. I CAN'T LIVE WITH THIS DOG,
IT'S MAKING ME CRAZY.
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311. I MEAN,
MY EYES ARE BURNING.
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312. RIGHT HERE, I HAVE A PAIN
THAT IS SO SEVERE,
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313. FREAKING DOG.
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314. ALLERGIC TO DOGS.
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315. YOU KNOW THE BRAUDYS?
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316. INTO ALANIS MORRISETTE?
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317. OH THAT IDIOT.
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318. YEAH, THAT GUY.
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319. THE OTHER NIGHT.
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320. THEY'RE LOOKING
FOR A DOG FOR THE KIDS.
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321. TO OSCAR,
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322. OFF YOUR HANDS TOMORROW.
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323. MY DAUGHTER'S IN LOVE
WITH THAT DOG, WHAT DO I DO?
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324. YOU'VE GOT TO SIT DOWN
AND TALK TO HER.
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325. CAN'T LIVE IN THIS HOUSE
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326. AND SHE'LL UNDERSTAND,
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327. DON'T YOU THINK?
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328. YEAH, I THINK
SHE WOULD.
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329. I MEAN, EXPLAIN IT TO HER,
WHAT'S GOING ON.
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330. IF SHE DOESN'T KNOW
YOU'VE GOT TO TELL HER.
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331. TELL HER,
TALK TO HER.
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332. HOLD ON.
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333. OH, MY GOD,
IT'S OSCAR!
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334. LOOK AT THAT, HE CAME,
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.
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335. WHAT A GOOD BOY,
YEAH, IT'S NICE
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336. TO SOMETHING GERMAN.
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337. YOU DON'T GET THE OPPORTUNITY
THAT OFTEN, YOU KNOW?
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338. GOOD BOY.
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339. DADDY DOESN'T
FEEL GOOD.
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340. SNEEZING.
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341. UP ALL NIGHT.
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342. IT HURTS RIGHT HERE.
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343. RIGHT HERE I HAVE A HORRIBLE,
HORRIBLE PAIN.
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344. ARE WATERING.
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345. AND I FEEL HORRIBLE.
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346. YOUR PAL, OSCAR...
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347. ALRIGHT?
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348. SO, YOU HAVE
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349. DADDY OR OSCAR.
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350. MM, OSCAR.
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351. NO, NO, WHAT I'M SAYING IS,
THAT IF YOU SAY OSCAR,
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352. DADDY WON'T BE HERE.
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353. I KNOW.
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354. YOU KNOW?
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355. MM-HMM.
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356. BUT YOU'RE CHOOSING OSCAR,
I'M YOUR DAD.
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357. I JUST LOVE THAT DOG.
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358. MM-HMM.
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359. TO THE BATHROOM.
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360. IN THREE DAYS.
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361. THIS IS RIDICULOUS.
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362. WE SHOULDN'T HAVE
CALLED THE COPS.
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363. WE SHOULDN'T HAVE EVEN
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364. IN THE FIRST PLACE.
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365. HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON?
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366. HE FOUND SOMETHING,
HAS HE GOT SOMETHING?
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367. WAIT A SECOND,
WAIT A SECOND, HOLD ON.
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368. I THINK HE'S FOUND
SOMETHING.
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369. GOT THERE?
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370. HOLY SHIT.
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371. WHAT DOES HE GOT?
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372. A BRA?
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373. IS THAT IT,
IS THERE MORE?
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374. IS THERE, IS THERE
A BODY WITH IT?
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375. NOTHING ELSE DOWN HERE,
THAT'S IT.
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376. THAT'S IT,
A BRA?
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377. THAT'S IT FOLKS,
THERE'S NOTHING ELSE IN THERE.
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378. OH, MY GOD.
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379. WELL, HE'S
A BRA-SNIFFING DOG.
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380. HE'S A GOOD
BRA-SNIFFING DOG.
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381. TERRIFIC.
GREAT.
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382. THIS IS BULLSHIT.
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383. ALL THIS FOR THAT?
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384. MYSTERY IS SOLVED.
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385. TO GET ALL THIS BACK?
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386. WELL, WITH WHAT YOU GOT
GOING ON HERE, IT'S A MESS.
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387. THEY DUG UP THE ELECTRIC,
THE GAS, THE PLUMBING, IT'S...
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388. SO, HOW LONG?
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389. IT'S THREE WEEKS
TO A MONTH, LARRY.
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390. YEAH, BUT THAT'S
ON THE SAFE SIDE.
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391. THINGS COULD ARISE, YOU GOT
THE CITY INVOLVED NOW.
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392. LARRY, I'M SORRY, BUT.
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393. HEY, LET ME
ASK YOU THIS?
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394. IN THE URINAL NOW?
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395. WHAT DO YOU THINK?
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396. I'LL APPLY FOR THAT,
THAT'S GOOD, LARRY.
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397. WE'LL GET
THE SPLASH GUARDS.
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398. BLESSING IN DISGUISE.
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399. LARRY!
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400. A DOG!
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401. OVER HER OWN FATHER.
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402. YOU SAT DOWN,
YOU LAID IT OUT,
YOU TOLD HER?
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403. I TOLD HER,
DADDY'S SICK.
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404. HE CAN'T STAY IN
THE SAME HOUSE WITH OSCAR.
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405. SHE WANTS OSCAR,
SHE WANTS THE DOG!
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406. OKAY, CALM DOWN.
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407. WHERE IS THE DOG?
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408. TO YOUR HOUSE.
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409. MY HOUSE?
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410. NO, NO, HIS HOUSE, HIS HOUSE,
I LIVE AT THE W. HOTEL.
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411. IT'S HIS HOUSE NOW.
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412. BY THE WAY,
HE TURNED UP A BRA TODAY.
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413. THERE'S NO CORPSE.
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414. A BRA?
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415. WHAT THE FUCK'S
WRONG WITH THAT DOG?
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416. HE'S A BRA-SNIFFING DOG.
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417. A BRA-SNIFFING DOG,
WHAT THE FUCK?
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418. HE'S CLOSING US DOWN
FOR THREE WEEKS NOW.
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419. BECAUSE OF A BRA?
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420. YEAH, THEY DUG UP
THE WHOLE PLACE IN THE...
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421. THAT FUCKING DOG!
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422. HEY, TAKE IT,
TAKE IT EASY.
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423. BALD CHEF AND TELL HIM.
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424. HE'S GONNA
BE DISAPPOINTED.
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425. SO, YOU KNOW WHAT?
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426. I DON'T KNOW WHAT
I'M GONNA DO.
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427. WHERE ARE YOU GONNA BE,
AT THE W. HOTEL?
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428. W. HOTEL.
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429. YOU'RE GONNA
HEAR FROM ME SOON.
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430. YOU'RE GONNA
HEAR FROM ME.
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431. WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
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432. TO TAKE CARE OF.
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433. FUCK!
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434. HI, LARRY.
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435. HI, SAMMI.
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436. MY MOMMY'S NEXT DOOR.
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437. SHE'LL BE HOME SOON.
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438. AND MY DADDY'S
AT A HOTEL.
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439. CAN I COME IN?
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440. MM-HMM.
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441. WHAT ARE YOU DRINKING?
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442. GRAPE JUICE,
WANT SOME?
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443. OH, POSITIVELY.
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444. ANYWAY, I ACTUALLY,
CAME TO TALK TO YOU.
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445. HMM.
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446. HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK
I'M GONNA HAVE THIS INSTEAD.
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447. OKAY.
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448. TO TRY THIS WINE.
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449. BELIEVE ME, I KNOW AS MUCH ABOUT
THIS STUFF AS THE NEXT GUY.
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450. COME ON.
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451. NO.
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452. TOO FRUITY.
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453. AND A TAD
ON THE OAKY SIDE.
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454. WHAT DOES OAKY MEAN?
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455. IT TASTES LIKE A TREE.
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456. LIKE A TREE.
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457. LET'S TALK
ABOUT YOUR DAD.
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458. OKAY?
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459. ISN'T THERE ANOTHER ANIMAL
THAT WE COULD INTEREST YOU IN?
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460. PUSSY CAT?
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461. I DON'T LIKE CATS.
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462. HOW ABOUT A RABBIT?
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463. MM-MM.
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464. PONY?
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465. THAT DIDN'T WANT A PONY.
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466. TURTLE?
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467. TURTLES SCARE ME.
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468. HAMSTER.
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469. TORTURE THEM A LITTLE BIT.
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470. THEY'RE BORING.
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471. NO, BUT YOU TORTURE THEM.
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472. IT'S NOT BORING
IF YOU TORTURE THEM.
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473. I LIKE OSCAR BETTER.
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474. OH, WHAT IS THAT,
THAT DOG WHISTLE?
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475. IS THAT OSCAR'S WHISTLE?
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476. UH-HUH.
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477. I WOULDN'T BLOW IT,
HE'S ASLEEP.
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478. OH, LOOK AT THIS.
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479. USE IT THE OTHER DAY.
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480. OF THE RESTAURANT.
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481. I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW THIS
THING WORKS ACTUALLY.
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482. WHERE'S THE WHISTLE PART?
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483. ANYWAY, THAT'S MY SPIEL.
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484. SO, COME ON, SAMMI.
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485. WHAT DO YOU SAY?
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486. I DON'T WANT OSCAR.
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487. I WANT DADDY.
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488. GO HOME!
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489. IT'S ALL
TAKEN CARE OF.
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490. THAT'S RIGHT.
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491. WE HAD A LITTLE CHAT.
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492. I'M TAKING HIM
TO THE BRAUDYS.
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493. HE'S SITTING RIGHT
NEXT TO ME.
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494. YOU'RE MORE
THAN WELCOME.
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495. ALRIGHT, MY FRIEND.
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496. GOOD-BYE.
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497. WELL, OSCEY BOY.
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498. HUH?
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499. WHAT DO YOU SAY,
OSCEY BOY?
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500. WE'RE GOING TO THE BRAUDYS,
YOU EXCITED?
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501. ABOUT THE BRAUDYS?
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502. COME HERE,
GIVE ME A KISS.
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503. GIVE ME A, GIVE UNCLE LARRY
A KISSY, THAT'S A GOOD BOY.
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504. OOH.
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505. ALRIGHT, LOOK AT
YOUR NEW HOME.
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506. YOU'RE SUCH
A GOOD BOY.
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507. YEAH, YOU'RE SUCH
A GOOD BOY!
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508. HELLO.
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509. HI.
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510. WELL?
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511. HERE'S OSCAR.
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512. ABOUT AT DINNER.
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513. RIGHT.
OSCAR.
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514. I REMEMBER DINNER.
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515. YEAH, ALL YOURS.
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516. TO SAY TO ME, LARRY?
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517. YEAH, CONGRATULATIONS.
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518. NO, I MEAN, DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING
ELSE TO SAY TO ME FROM DINNER?
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519. VERY MUCH.
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520. AT HOW GOOD IT WAS ACTUALLY.
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521. VERY FUNNY,
THAT'S VERY FUNNY.
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522. LOOK, I DIDN'T WANT TO MAKE
A BIG DEAL OUT OF IT,
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523. ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED AT DINNER.
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524. LARRY, I'M WAITING,
I'M JUST WAITING.
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525. I'M STILL WAITING.
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526. WELL, I GUESS YOU'LL HAVE
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527. IF IT'S A THANK YOU
THAT YOU'RE WAITING FOR.
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528. LITTLE MORE THAN YOU CAN HANDLE.
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529. NO, IT'S NOT MORE
THAN I CAN HANDLE.
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530. R THE MEAL,
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531. I WOULD'VE THANKED YOU
AS I TOLD YOU.
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532. OKAY.
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533. EXTRAORDINARY.
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534. IT'S EXTRAORDINARY,
IT'S A SHAME.
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535. SO, AM I TO ASSUME THAT
YOU DO NOT WANT THE DOG?
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536. YOU'RE SAYING TO ME?
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537. LARRY, IF YOU WANT
TO THANK ME FOR DINNER,
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538. LOOK AT YOUR DOG.
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539. THEY DESERVE TO BE THANKED.
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540. MM-HMM.
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541. IN THIS PARTICULAR INSTANCE, YOU
DO NOT DESERVE TO BE THANKED.
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542. BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T WORKED A DAY
SINCE YOU GOT OUT OF COLLEGE,
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543. YOU'VE NEVER
HELD A JOB.
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544. HEY, LOOK IT'S A DOG.
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545. DOGGIE!
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546. OH, HE'S SO CUTE.
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547. LEAVE THE DOGGIE ALONE,
HE'S NOT OUR DOG.
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548. HIS NAME'S OSCAR.
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549. THAT'S LARRY'S DOG.
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550. THIS DOG TO YOU,
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551. DOESN'T WANT IT.
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552. DON'T BE SILLY, YOU WEREN'T
GONNA GIVE HIM TO ME.
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553. IT'S YOUR DOG, LARRY.
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554. WE'RE GONNA GET A DOG.
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555. TALKING, BUT...
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556. OH, HE'S SUCH A GOOD DOG.
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557. NOT THIS DOG.
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558. WE'LL GO LOOK FOR A DOG
SOME PLACE ELSE.
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559. WHEN THERE'S ONE RIGHT HERE?
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560. YEAH.
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561. PLEASE?
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562. PLEASE?
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563. OKAY, OKAY,
ALRIGHT.
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564. HERE YOU GO, BOYS.
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565. LET'S GO.
COOL.
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566. HEY, HEY,
WHAT DO YOU SAY?
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567. THANK YOU!
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568. YOU'RE WELCOME.
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569. HE SLEEPS ON MY BED.
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570. ENJOY.
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571. OH, SHIT.
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572. YOU SICK FUCK,
LARRY DAVID!
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573. THINK YOU'RE DOING
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574. GETTING MY KID DRUNK?
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575. DRUNK, WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?
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576. SHE'S SLURRING HER WORDS,
SHE'S BUMPING INTO THINGS.
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577. A FUCKIN' WINO!
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578. OH, I POURED SOME OF YOUR—
I HAD POURED SOME WINE.
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579. OH, SHE MUST HAVE ACCIDENTALLY,
A SEVEN-YEAR-OLD KID,
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580. DRANK SOME WINE?
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581. IT WAS A,
THE GLASSES GOT...
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582. DO I LOOK LIKE A FUCKING IDIOT,
THAT I'M GON BELIEVE YOU?
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583. THE FUCKING DOG, ALRIGHT?
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584. NO, SHE TOLD ME
I COULD HAVE THE DOG.
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585. ALL FUCKED UP ON ALCOHOL.
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586. ALL LIQUORED UP.
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587. A SPEECH IMPEDIMENT.
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588. YOU'VE KNOWN THE KID
SINCE SHE WAS BORN,
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589. A SPEECH IMPEDIMENT.
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590. THAT'S WHAT WAS
SO PUZZLING TO ME.
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591. OH, LISTEN,
YOU FOUR-EYED FUCK.
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592. YOU STOLE THE DOG!
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593. SHE'S AT HOME HYSTERICAL
THAT HER DOG IS GONE!
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594. I DON'T KNOW
WHAT YOU DID TO HIM.
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595. ANIMAL TESTING OR SOMETHING,
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596. FUCKO ASSHOLE.
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597. GET ME THE FUCKING DOG!
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598. FIRST OF ALL,
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599. FOR DINNER THE OTHER NIGHT.
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600. I DON'T KNOW
WHAT GOT INTO ME.
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601. ABOUT THAT.
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602. YOU'RE MARRIED,
YOU'RE A COUPLE.
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603. YOU GET THANKED.
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604. IT'S A 50/50 THING.
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605. SO, WHAT IF HE WORKS
AND YOU DON'T?
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606. TO DO WITH IT.
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607. YOU'RE A HOUSEWIFE,
YOU RAISE THE KIDS.
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608. YOU'VE GOT KIDS,
THAT'S A FULL TIME JOB.
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609. A THANK YOU.
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610. AND I WAS DEAD WRONG.
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611. AND I'M SORRY.
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612. THANK YOU.
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613. I...
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614. THAT'S GREAT.
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615. THAT WASN'T EASY TO DO
AND I REALLY DO APPRECIATE IT.
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616. YOU KNOW WHAT, ONCE
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617. AND HOW WRONG I WAS,
IT WAS EASY TO DO.
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618. I'M VERY,
I AM IMPRESSED.
Copy !req
619. AND LISTEN, WHEN YOU'RE WRONG,
YOU'RE WRONG, YOU KNOW?
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620. I JUST DIDN'T,
BUT THANK YOU.
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621. GOOD, GOOD.
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622. HOW'S THE DOG
WORKING OUT?
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623. THE DOG IS
ACTUALLY GREAT.
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624. REALLY?
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625. YEAH, THE KIDS
ARE LOVING HIM.
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626. THEY'RE LOVING HIM,
HE'S SWEET AS CAN BE.
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627. AND WELL TRAINED, JUST LIKE
YOU SAID, HE'S TERRIFIC.
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628. I'LL TELL YOU
WHY I'M ASKING,
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629. BECAUSE SOMETHING'S
COME UP AND...
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630. THE OWNER OF THE DOG,
ACTUALLY WANTS THE DOG BACK.
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631. I JUST LEFT HER, AND...
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632. HER KID'S PRETTY
BROKEN UP ABOUT IT.
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633. WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
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634. WELL, IT'S A LONG STORY,
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635. I COULD HAVE THE DOG.
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636. THE TIME, UNBEKNOWNST TO ME.
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637. SHE'S DRUNK,
HOW OLD IS THIS GIRL?
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638. SEVEN.
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639. ANYWAY.
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640. SO, WHEN SHE SAID
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641. SHE WASN'T IN HER...
DIDN'T HAVE ALL OF HER SENSES.
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642. ALRIGHT, OKAY, OKAY.
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643. ALRIGHT, SO NOW
I UNDERSTAND.
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644. SO THAT'S WHY
YOU'RE HERE.
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645. NO, I CAME TO THANK YOU
FOR DINNER.
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646. GOD, I JUST KNEW IT,
I KNEW IT.
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647. AND AS LONG AS I'M HERE
I'LL TAKE THE DOG.
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648. HAPPEN TO BE HERE,
YOU'LL TAKE THE DOG BACK.
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649. WHAT ARE YOU, SICK?
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650. I'M ONLY ASKING,
I REALLY NEED IT.
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651. I MEAN, SHE WANTS
THE DOG BACK.
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652. IT'S HER DOG,
IT IS HER DOG.
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653. NO, IT'S NOT HER DOG
ANYMORE, LARRY,
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654. BROUGHT IT HERE.
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655. YOU'VE HAD IT FOR A HALF HOUR
SO, YOU THINK IT'S YOUR DOG?
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656. YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S NOT
GOING TO HAPPEN.
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657. OSCEY.
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658. JUST GET, LEAVE,
LEAVE RIGHT NOW.
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659. CALLING THE POLICE.
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660. I'M SORRY.
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661. YOU'RE NOT GIVING ME
THE DOG?
Copy !req
662. NO, I AM NOT.
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663. I'M NOT GIVING YOU MY DOG.
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664. WELL, YOU'RE REALLY GONNA
DISAPPOINT A LITTLE GIRL.
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665. WELL, LARRY, YOU GO BACK AND
TELL HER TO HAVE ANOTHER DRINK.
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666. BECAUSE SHE'S NOT
GETTING HER DOG BACK, OKAY?
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667. OKAY, I TAKE BACK
MY THANK YOU, BY THE WAY.
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668. ACTUALLY GAVE ME ANYWAY.
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669. OKAY, BYE, LARRY.
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670. B'BYE, NOW,
B'BYE, NOW!
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671. YOU CAN LEAVE NOW.
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672. I WILL BE CALLING THE POLICE.
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673. GO, B'BYE.
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674. WALK MY DOG.
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675. THEN I'M GONNA HAVE HIM
DO A LITTLE FETCHING FOR ME.
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676. THE POOL.
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677. BYE, LARRY.
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678. BYE, NO, KEEP GOING.
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679. KEEP GOING,
LEAVE!
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680. OSCAR, OSCAR!
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681. GOOD BOY!
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682. OSCAR, YOU COME BACK!
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683. LARRY, YOU PIECE
OF SHIT!
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684. THANK YOU,
THANK YOU VERY MUCH!
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685. WHAT'S GOING ON?
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686. WHY'D YOU BRING
THE DOG BACK?
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687. Captions Copyright 2002
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688. A Division of TIME WARNER
ENTERTAINMENT COMPANY, L.P.
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689. Captioned by
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690. Captioned by
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