Curb Your Enthusiasm 2x6

1. by

2. A Division of TIME WARNER ENTERTAINMENT COMPANY, L.P.

3. OH, SO...

4. HOW ARE WE DOING?

5. ALRIGHT.

6. FEELING ALRIGHT,

7. SENSATIONS?

8. NO, HOW MUCH LONGER?

9. UH, MAYBE 10 TO 15 MORE MINUTES.

10. AH, VERY GOOD, VERY GOOD.

11. YEAH, I THINK YOU'LL BE VERY HAPPY WITH THE TREATMENT.

12. MM-HMM. REALLY?

13. YOU'RE GONNA FIX MY NECK, HUH?

14. WELL, OF COURSE,

15. MY PRESCRIBED COURSE.

16. UH-HUH.

17. FOUR TO SIX WEEKS, MAYBE TWICE A WEEK.

18. MM-HMM. YEAH.

19. WELL, FORGIVE ME FOR SOUNDING A LITTLE CYNICAL,

20. BUT I'VE HEARD THAT BEFORE.

21. YOU HAVE?

22. OH, YEAH, I'VE BEEN TO A LOT OF DIFFERENT PEOPLE.

23. TELL ME THE SAME THING.

24. REALLY?

25. ANY RESULTS.

26. I'VE BEEN TO DOCTORS AND CHIROPRACTORS AND...

27. HEALERS, PEOPLE WHO CALL THEMSELVES HEALERS.

28. YEAH, HEALERS.

29. THAT IS.

30. WELL, I UNDERSTAND YOUR CONCERNS.

31. AND IT'S BEEN IN MY FAMILY FOR SEVERAL HUNDRED YEARS.

32. YEAH?

33. YES.

34. UH-HUH.

35. TOTAL RECOVERY.

36. YOU DO, HUH?

37. YES.

38. OKAY, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.

39. PROPOSITION FOR YOU.

40. HMM?

41. IF YOU CAN FIX MY NECK, I'LL GIVE YOU $5,000.

42. AND IF YOU CAN'T,

43. THEN I DON'T PAY FOR ANY OF THE TREATMENTS.

44. $5,000?

45. $5,000.

46. AND YOU RECOVER?

47. YEP.

48. AND IF YOU DO NOT RECOVER, I GET NOTHING?

49. YOU GET NOTHING.

50. WELL, IT WOULD BE LIKE TAKING CANDY FROM A BABY, BUT—

51. REALLY?

52. YES.

53. YOUR CONFIDENCE.

54. WELL, WAIT A MINUTE NOW, IF I CURE YOU,

55. YOU ARE CURED OR NOT?

56. WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

57. YOU'RE SAYING THAT I WOULDN'T TELL YOU?

58. JUST SO I WOULDN'T HAVE TO PAY THE MONEY, THAT'S RIDICULOUS.

59. COME ON, I'M A MAN OF HONOR.

60. IT'S A FAMILY TRADITION, HONOR.

61. WELL, IT'S NOT IN MY FAMILY,

62. BUT I'M TRYING TO BREAK THE MOLD.

63. ALRIGHT, DONE.

64. I HOPE YOU WIN.

65. LARRY?

66. THANK YOU.

67. WHOA.

68. HOW YOU DOIN' ?

69. HEY.

70. IT'S BARRY.

71. YEAH.

72. YOU DON'T HAVE TO LOOK AT ME THAT WAY,

73. NO NEED FOR PITY.

74. NO, I MEAN, I'M JUST SHOCKED TO SEE YOU HERE...

75. WORKING.

76. BEEN DOING THIS?

77. IT'S BEEN AWHILE.

78. WHAT DO YOU WANT?

79. UM...

80. AND A HALF POUND OF TURKEY.

81. OF SWISS...

82. POUND OF TURKEY.

83. ALRIGHT.

84. AT "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE" ?

85. UH, YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES YOU RUN INTO SOMEBODY, YOU KNOW?

86. AND ANDY OCCASIONALLY.

87. OH, YEAH, HOW'S ELLIOT DOING?

88. GOOD.

89. THE WRITING WASN'T HAPPENING, HUH?

90. WELL, YOU KNOW, JUST COULDN'T WRITE FOR TV ANYMORE.

91. THINGS ARE GOING GOOD.

92. WITH MY DAD...

93. SITUATION.

94. MY DAD?

95. YEAH.

96. HE CAME TO YOUR HOUSE, YEAH, I REMEMBER.

97. HE'S DOING THIS LIKE...

98. ON THE SWISS IF YOU CAN.

99. I COVERED MY MOUTH.

100. YEAH, SURE.

101. YEAH, SO, MY DAD IS JUST DOING THIS,

102. HE'S BASICALLY DYING IS WHAT'S HAPPENING.

103. AND HE HAD A TRIPLE BYPASS,

104. A QUADRUPLE BYPASS.

105. OH, BOY, HE'S GOT SEVEN TOTAL BASES THERE, YEAH.

106. AND UH, HE'S LEFT ME THE MONEY IN HIS WILL.

107. BUT HE WON'T LET ME HAVE ANY OF IT, YOU KNOW?

108. NOT A PENNY, UNTIL, LIKE, HE'S ACTUALLY DEAD.

109. YOUR FATHER'S GOT A LOT OF MONEY, DOESN'T HE?

110. YEAH, YEAH, YOU KNOW, AND SO, IT'S, UH...

111. HE KNOWS YOU'RE WORKING IN A DELI?

112. HE DOES, YEAH.

113. AND HE WON'T GIVE YOU THE MONEY UNTIL HE DIES?

114. DO THAT?

115. I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL HE DIES.

116. THAT'S CRAZY.

117. YOU'D THINK THAT HE WOULD WANT HIS KID TO BE HAPPY,

118. LIKE, FOR, AS HIS LAST MEMORIES OF HIM, YOU KNOW?

119. 'CAUSE I CAN'T FIND IT.

120. UM, HEY, LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING.

121. IT'S REALLY AMAZING THAT YOU CAME IN HERE TODAY.

122. HELP ME OUT.

123. RIGHT.

124. BORROW $5,000.

125. OF COURSE YOU DO.

126. I'LL BE ABLE TO PAY YOU BACK AS SOON AS HE, YOU KNOW,

127. AS HE GOES.

128. YEAH, WHEN DO EXPECT THAT'LL BE?

129. VERY SOON...

130. VERY SOON.

131. OKAY, TELL ME IF I GOT THIS RIGHT.

132. YOU GAVE $5,000 TO THE ACUPUNCTURIST?

133. YEAH.

134. AND $5,000 TO THAT ASSHOLE, BARRY WEINER?

135. OH, ASSHOLE.

136. UMM...

137. SO, IN THE LAST THREE HOURS YOU'VE GIVEN AWAY $10,000.

138. YEAH, IT'S NOT QUITE ACCURATE.

139. I HAVEN'T GIVEN

140. THE $5,000 YET.

141. AND I'LL BE HAPPY TO

142. HE DOES, BY THE WAY.

143. AND...

144. WEINER'S FATHER

145. AND HE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO LIVE THAT LONG,

146. AND THEN HE'LL GIVE ME THE MONEY BACK.

147. AND I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU CALL HIM AN ASSHOLE.

148. HE'S NOT AN ASSHOLE, HE'S JUST SHY.

149. NO, HE'S NOT SHY.

150. HE THINKS HE'S SMARTER THAN EVERYBODY ELSE,

151. NO, HE DOESN'T, HE'S JUST SHY.

152. YOU GOT SHY ASSHOLE CONFUSION, MY FRIEND.

153. NO, I DON'T THINK SO, MY FRIEND.

154. YES, I THINK SO, MY FRIEND.

155. HANDS OUT, YOU CAN'T SAY NO?

156. SAYING NO.

157. YOU KNOW WHY?

158. 'CAUSE YOU'RE A PUSSY.

159. I'M BEING FRANK.

160. MAYBE I'M NICE.

161. PUSSY CONFUSION.

162. MAYBE I'M JUST NICE.

163. WIFE'S SURPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY

164. AND I COULDN'T SAY NO TO THAT EITHER.

165. HEY THERE, FLOWERS FOR LARRY DAVID.

166. CHERYL, SOMEBODY SENT ME FLOWERS.

167. AND YOU JUST HAVEN'T TOLD ME ABOUT THAT?

168. YEAH, I WISH.

169. THANKS.

170. A $5,000 TIP?

171. BIZARRE.

172. FLOWERS.

173. SEND YOU FLOWERS?

174. I DON'T KNOW.

175. THEY'RE PRETTY.

176. "ENJOY THESE BEAUTIFUL ORCHIDS, KAZU."

177. WHO'S KAZU?

178. THE ACUPUNCTURIST.

179. GIVING YOU FLOWERS?

180. I DON'T KNOW.

181. SO, I DON'T KNOW, YOU KNOW, WORKING IN THE DELI,

182. IT WAS JUST,

183. TO SEE HIM LIKE THAT.

184. DID YOU EVEN KNOW, DID YOU KNOW HE WAS WORKING THERE?

185. NO, I DIDN'T KNOW HE WAS WORKING IN THE DELI.

186. CONTACT WITH ME.

187. BUT HE DIDN'T LET ME KNOW THAT STUFF.

188. UH-HUH, BOY.

189. BUT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD, GO YOU.

190. GO ME, NOT YOU?

191. NO, NOT ME.

192. YEAH, GO ME.

193. A SURPRISE PARTY...

194. FOR HIS WIFE.

195. YOU'RE GOING?

196. YEAH, I'LL PICK YOU UP, WE'LL GO TOGETHER.

197. SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS WHOLE ORCHID THING?

198. IT'S, YOU KNOW, I THINK IT'S SOME SORT OF

199. JAPANESE, GAY THING.

200. REALLY? YEAH.

201. THIS IS A LITTLE STRANGE,

202. I DON'T KNOW IF I'LL EVEN GO BACK TO HIM.

203. I DON'T THINK I'LL GO BACK, 'CAUSE OF TH.

204. WOULD YOU? I DON'T KNOW?

205. WOULD YOU GO BACK?

206. IT'S A WEIRD THING.

207. I WOULDN'T GO BACK.

208. LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION.

209. TO SEND ANOTHER MAN ORCHIDS,

210. A PROFESSIONAL MAN?

211. DOCTOR, OR A...

212. SEE, I KNEW YOU'D

213. TO ASK HIM.

214. HE'S BEEN WEIRD ALL LUNCH.

215. WHAT THE HELL?

216. WHAT WAS THAT?

217. THAT GUY'S A FREAK.

218. A CHORD.

219. HEY, LARRY.

220. HEY, JOEL.

221. GOOD TO SEE YOU.

222. IT'S BEEN A FEW DAYS.

223. YEAH, THIS IS MY MANAGER, JEFF GREENE.

224. JEFF, NICE TO MEET YOU.

225. ABOUT YOU.

226. HE'S GOING TO HANDLE

227. ALL MY MONEY.

228. OUT THAT WAY?

229. LOVE ME.

230. YEAH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING, YOU'RE NOT WORKING TODAY?

231. YEAH, I'M GOING BACK RIGHT NOW.

232. WELL, WHAT'S WITH THE OUTFIT?

233. OH, IT'S CASUAL FRIDAY.

234. I DON'T LIKE THIS.

235. I DON'T LIKE THIS CASUAL.

236. WHAT ARE YOU, MY MOTHER?

237. YOU'RE ENCROACHING IN MY TERRITORY.

238. UNCOMFORTABLE ALL THE TIME.

239. WELL, YOU DON'T LIKE THIS,

240. ON NAKED TUESDAYS.

241. YEAH, NAKED TUESDAYS.

242. SEE, HE'S A FUNNY LAWYER.

243. ALRIGHT, LISTEN, I GOTTA GO.

244. NICE TO MEET YOU.

245. ALRIGHT, I'LL SEE YOU.

246. I'LL SEE YOU TUESDAY.

247. CASUAL FRIDAY.

248. PISSES ME OFF.

249. I'M TELLING YA, SOON IT'S GOING TO BE CASUAL MONDAY.

250. FIVE TO 10 YEARS.

251. THAT'S THE DIRECTION WE'RE HEADING.

252. IT'S GOING TO BE A SAD STATE OF AFFAIRS.

253. PEOPLE LIKE YOU, WALKING AROUND LIKE PEOPLE LIKE ME.

254. IT'S NO GOOD.

255. I'LL NEVER DO IT.

256. YEAH, WAIT'LL YOU TASTE THIS FLAMBé.

257. I'M TELLING YOU, IT IS SENSATIONAL.

258. IT'S WHY WE CAME.

259. AH, HERE WE GO BEAUTIFUL.

260. SO, I GOT A MEETING SET UP FOR YOU AT ABC.

261. WITH JULIA AND...

262. OKAY.

263. OH, MY GOD.

264. OH, JESUS!

265. HONEY?

266. WHAT?

267. WHERE'S JEFF?

268. I DON'T KNOW.

269. HERE 15 MINUTES AGO.

270. I KNOW.

271. WITH HIM ANYWAY?

272. I DON'T KNOW, HE ASKED ME IF HE COULD PICK US UP.

273. AND YOU COULDN'T SAY NO.

274. LISTEN, I THINK WE SHOULD JUST GO WITHOUT HIM.

275. WELL, HE'LL, I'M SURE—

276. OH, THERE HE IS.

277. THERE HE IS.

278. OKAY, LET'S GET GOING.

279. HI, OH, THANK YOU.

280. PRETTY YOU LOOK.

281. WELL, THANK YOU.

282. YOU LOOK PRETTY TOO.

283. I'M A PRETTY LITTLE GIRL.

284. LARRY!

285. HEY.

286. WELL, WHAT, WHAT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

287. SO LONG?

288. WELL, ROOM SERVICE WAS LATE WITH MY FOOD.

289. WHAT DO YOU WANT?

290. NO.

291. YOU'RE NOT WEARING THAT.

292. WHAT, WHY?

293. YOU'RE NOT WEARING JEANS TO THIS PARTY.

294. THEY'RE NOT JEANS, THEY'RE CORDUROY PANTS.

295. THAT'S THE SAME THING.

296. AND A BLACK JACKET, NO.

297. OH, BLUE AND BLACK THAT'S NO GOOD?

298. THAT'S NO GOOD.

299. YOU NEED TO CHANGE.

300. BLUE AND BLACK NO GOOD?

301. THIS ONE, PLEASE.

302. YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO CHANGE.

303. AND QUICKLY.

304. YOU LOOK TERRIBLE.

305. IT'S AWFUL.

306. T-SHIRT LIKE YOURS TO PUT ON,

307. ASSHOLE.

308. WHAT'S WRONG WITH A LIME GREEN T-SHIRT?

309. NO, IT LOOKS GOOD.

310. WELL, THANK YOU.

311. NO, I COMPLETELY—

312. OH.

313. OH, SHIT.

314. OH, MY GOD.

315. HI.

316. JEEZ.

317. HI, CAROL.

318. I DON'T KNOW WHO TO HUG.

319. HI.

320. SEE YOU.

321. THE OTHER DAY.

322. I LEFT MY SUNGLASSES, I CAME BY TO PICK THEM UP.

323. OH, MY GOSH.

324. WOW, THIS IS SO BIZARRE.

325. SO, YOU GOT 'EM, RIGHT?

326. YEAH.

327. ALRIGHT, WELL, WHY DON'T YOU TWO GO IN,

328. WE'LL WAIT OUT HERE.

329. WHAT IS THAT?

330. IT'S MY BIRTHDAY.

331. THAT'S WHY WE GOT YOU A BIRTHDAY GIFT.

332. WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY.

333. 'CAUSE HE TOLD ME IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY,

334. SO, I KNEW I WAS GONNA STOP BY FOR THE SUNGLASSES AND I...

335. IT'S FROM THE THREE OF US.

336. THERE'S A SURPRISE PARTY IN THAT HOUSE.

337. HONEY.

338. UM...

339. YOU'RE HAVING A SURPRISE PARTY?

340. WHAT, YOU DIDN'T INVITE US?

341. OH, MY GOD, I...

342. I'M SO SORRY, CAROL.

343. HIS OUTFIT.

344. YOU ARE SO SELFISH.

345. SURPRISE!

346. YEAH, GREAT, THANKS.

347. HAPPY?

348. YOU KNEW?

349. WHAT HAPPENED?

350. OUTFIT AND IT WAS JUST...

351. AMOUNT OF TIME.

352. HE HAD TO EAT.

353. FOR TWO HOURS.

354. OH, MY GOD, YOU GUYS, OH.

355. SIT DOWN, HAVE A BIG FUCKING MEAL IN THE HOTEL.

356. DO YOU BELIEVE THEM, DO YOU BELIEVE WHAT THEY DID TO ME?

357. I MEAN, 600,000 PEOPLE.

358. 600,000 PEOPLE DIED IN THE CIVIL WAR.

359. AND FOR WHAT, TO SAVE THE UNION?

360. WHY, WHY DID WE WANT TO SAVE THE UNION?

361. WHO CARES?

362. I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T CARE.

363. ABOUT SAVING THE UNION?

364. THE SOUTH?

365. WHAT DO YOU DO?

366. WELL, I DO A LOT OF WORK FOR THE NRDC.

367. NRDC.

368. IS THAT?

369. DEFENSE COUNSEL.

370. OH, YOU'RE AN ENVIRONMENTALIST?

371. I AM.

372. THAT'S WONDERFUL.

373. THANK YOU.

374. I MEAN, I WISH MY SON COULD GET INTO SOMETHING LIKE THAT,

375. BUT NO, THERE'S NO CHANCE OF THAT.

376. NO.

377. HERE TONIGHT?

378. SHE DIDN'T LIKE MY OUTFIT.

379. YOU LOOK GOOD, THOUGH.

380. I DIDN'T GET "OUTFIT APPROVAL" TONIGHT.

381. "OUTFIT APPROVAL" ?

382. HUH?

383. YOUR OUTFIT.

384. I LISTENED TO HER.

385. UP TO CHANGE.

386. RIGHT.

387. THAT'S ONE OF THE REASONS THAT...

388. YOU KNOW, WE WERE LATE.

389. 'CAUSE I LISTENED TO HER.

390. IF WE'RE NOT FIGHTING FOR THE ENVIRONMENT,

391. THEN WE'RE FIGHTING

392. SO, WE CAN FIGHT FOR THE ENVIRONMENT.

393. MONEY?

394. NEED MONEY.

395. WELL, IT'S A NON-PROFIT ORGANIZATION, SO...

396. YOU NEVER CALLED ME.

397. NO, I DIDN'T.

398. I DIDN'T

399. YOU KNOW, I'M NOT, I'M NOT POOR.

400. YOU AREN'T?

401. WELL, MR. WEINER, MAYBE WE SHOULD TALK.

402. OH, CALL ME C.D.

403. MM, WHAT DOES C.D. STAND FOR?

404. OH, LET'S SEE.

405. "CERTIFIED DEPOSIT".

406. FOR THE NRDC.

407. OF THAT.

408. HAVE LUNCH?

409. AND WE'LL TALK ABOUT

410. SOMETHING?

411. OH, MY GOSH, THAT WOULD BE WONDERFUL.

412. YEAH, WELL, YOU'RE NOT GONNA JUST TALK ABOUT MONEY.

413. OF COURSE NOT.

414. WE'LL TALK ABOUT EACH OTHER.

415. OKAY.

416. I'D LIKE TO GET TO KNOW YOU.

417. WOW.

418. I'D LIKE TO GET TO KNOW YOU TOO.

419. OH, MY GOD, YOU'RE GONNA GIVE ME ANOTHER HEART ATTACK.

420. STOP IT, MR. WEINER.

421. OH, MY GOODNESS.

422. YOU'RE SO CHARMING AND BEAUTIFUL.

423. I DON'T KNOW HOW THAT SCHLEP EVER MARRIED YOU.

424. ME EITHER.

425. KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

426. SINCERELY.

427. HI.

428. BARRY'S FATHER?

429. I SURE DO, HOW YOU DOING?

430. HI, HOW ARE YOU?

431. SEE YOU. GOOD.

432. WELL, PLEASE EXCUSE ME TO THE LADIES' ROOM.

433. LARRY, WHY DON'T YOU HAVE A SEAT HERE?

434. MR. WEINER.

435. YOU WILL BE BACK, THOUGH?

436. I WILL BE BACK.

437. 'CAUSE HE CERTAINLY CAN'T FILL IN FOR YOU.

438. NO, HE CAN'T.

439. BUT HE'LL DO HIS BEST.

440. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

441. YOU'LL COME RIGHT BACK.

442. YEAH.

443. OH, MY GOD.

444. WHAT A TREAT, OH, GOD.

445. IN JAPAN FOR...

446. ANOTHER MAN?

447. LIKE A PROFESSIONAL, SOMEONE WHO'S A PROFESSIONAL,

448. OR AN...

449. ACUPUNCTURIST?

450. NOW, HOW THE HELL WOULD I KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?

451. I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY DO IN JAPAN.

452. FOR ALL I KNOW IN JAPAN.

453. ASKIN' ME FOR?

454. IT'S A STUPID QUESTION.

455. SO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING THESE DAYS?

456. I'M WORKING ON...

457. FROM "SEINFELD" ?

458. YEAH.

459. YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.

460. WELL, HOW DO YOU KNOW HER?

461. THE SHOW.

462. WHAT SHOW, "SEINFELD" ?

463. YEAH, "SEINFELD".

464. WHAT DID YOU DO?

465. I WAS THE CO-CREATOR.

466. MADE A BUNDLE.

467. I DID OKAY.

468. YOU'RE A LUCKY BASTARD.

469. I AM, I'M VERY LUCKY.

470. AND I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING.

471. I'M LUCKY THAT I HAD A FATHER

472. NEVER WOULD HAVE HAPPENED.

473. A DRY CLEANER.

474. I DIDN'T TELL HIM.

475. I HAD NO MONEY, BUT I NEEDED TO SUPPORT MYSELF.

476. AND THEN ONE DAY, HE FOUND OUT ABOUT IT...

477. NEXT THING I KNEW,

478. LISTEN, I GOT A LOT OF MONEY.

479. I'M GONNA GIVE YOU THIS MONEY ANYWAY, AFTER I DIE.

480. YOU SOME NOW.

481. MONEY BEFORE HE DIED?

482. OH, YES, HE DID.

483. GO OUT AND START WRITING.

484. "SEINFELD" IF NOT FOR HIM.

485. IN THE REFRIGERATOR,

486. WHEN HE CAME OVER,

487. THINGS TO EAT.

488. I BOUGHT A BARCOLOUNGER,

489. WITH THE MONEY.

490. WHEN HE'D COME OVER TO MY HOUSE HE COULD SIT AND RELAX.

491. WHY SHOULD HE WAIT UNTIL HE'S DEAD TO GIVE ME THE MONEY?

492. IT'S RIDICULOUS.

493. LISTEN, PUT A SOCK IN IT.

494. I GOT TO MOVE FAST.

495. AN ESTATE LAWYER?

496. MY LAWYER'S IN ACAPULCO.

497. LAWYER RIGHT AWAY.

498. YEAH, I KNOW A GREAT ESTATE LAWYER, JOEL REYNOLDS.

499. THE OTHER DAY.

500. REYNOLDS, WHERE HE IS?

501. YEAH, HE'S IN SANTA MONICA.

502. REYNOLDS AND MCKAY, HE'S GREAT.

503. HE'S GOOD WITH ESTATES?

504. HE'S TERRIFIC, YEAH.

505. YOU MEAN, THAT KIND OF STUFF.

506. AND I CAN'T WAIT FOR MY LAWYER.

507. THE LAWYER.

508. YOUR WIFE.

509. WHAT KIND OF CHANGE, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

510. YOU'LL FIND OUT.

511. I DON'T KNOW, CHERYL.

512. MAYBE HE'LL MAKE A CONTRIBUTION.

513. HEY, THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN IS YOU'LL FLY TO MEXICO WITH HIM

514. WITH A BIG CHECK.

515. HA-HA.

516. MEETING FOR LUNCH?

517. OH, THAT'S THE JAPANESE RESTAURANT.

518. JEFF LAST WEEK.

519. HEY, BARRY WEINER'S HERE.

520. ALRIGHT, LISTEN, GET AS MUCH MONEY AS YOU CAN FROM HIM.

521. BE CHARMING.

522. OKAY, GOODBYE.

523. WHAT DID YOU DO?

524. DID YOU DO?

525. STORY ABOUT A DRY CLEANER?

526. YEAH, I TOLD HIM THAT I WORKED IN A DRY CLEANER,

527. ABOUT IT AND THEN,

528. THE MONEY AFTER HE DIED,

529. BEFORE HE DIED.

530. YEAH, WELL, YOUR LITTLE CONSPIRACY WITH CHERYL WORKED.

531. HE CUT ME OUT OF THE WILL, LARRY.

532. I PUT YOU UP TO IT,

533. AND NOW, HE'S CUT ME

534. HIS MONEY TO NDRC.

535. NRDC.

536. NRDC, WHATEVER THE HELL IT IS.

537. PLANNED, YOUR LITTLE CONSPIRACY.

538. BUT WHY, WHEN HE LEFT LAST NIGHT AFTER THE STORY,

539. THE NAME OF A LAWYER FROM ME.

540. YOU GAVE HIM.

541. HE'S DOWN THERE RIGHT NOW, LARRY.

542. MY FUCKING LIFE DOWN THE TOILET.

543. THAT'S WHAT HE'S DOING RIGHT NOW, THANKS TO YOUR HELP.

544. OKAY, ALRIGHT, BYE-BYE.

545. HELLO, SIR, JOEL REYNOLDS.

546. YOU'RE JOEL REYNOLDS?

547. YES, I AM.

548. HAVE A SEAT, SIR?

549. YEAH, IN A MINUTE.

550. UH, I'M A LITTLE PUZZLED.

551. WHAT'S THIS OUTFIT, IS IT A HALLOWEEN PARTY,

552. OR WHAT IS IT?

553. OH, IT'S CASUAL FRIDAY.

554. CASUAL FRIDAY, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

555. LIKE WE WOULD AT HOME.

556. BUT YOU'RE NOT AT HOME.

557. NO, IT IS CASUAL FRIDAY, SO.

558. YEAH, I KNOW, YOU TOLD ME THAT ALREADY.

559. ON CASUAL FRIDAY?

560. WE JUST COME IN, DO OUR WORK.

561. CASUALLY.

562. I DON'T LIKE IT.

563. WELL, IT'S JUST ONE DAY OF THE WEEK.

564. I DON'T GIVE A DAMN IF IT'S HALF A DAY A WEEK.

565. I DON'T LIKE IT.

566. I'M HERE TO CHANGE MY WILL.

567. IS INVOLVED.

568. IT'S VERY IMPORTANT TO ME.

569. OH, WE WOULDN'T TREAT YOU CASUALLY.

570. YOU DRESS THAT WAY?

571. IT'S JUST—

572. ON CUTTING EDGE, MAN,

573. WHENEVER YOU'RE HANDLING MY BUSINESS.

574. THIS IS CUTTING EDGE.

575. I DON'T NEED THIS CRAP.

576. A FUCKING COWBOY.

577. YOU'RE J.R., HUH?

578. JOEL REYNOLDS, RIGHT?

579. YOU BELONG IN DALLAS, NOT L.A.

580. I'M SORRY,

581. YEAH, YOU SHOULD

582. LOST MY ACCOUNT.

583. SOMEBODY ELSE'S.

584. VERY MUCH.

585. SONOFABITCH.

586. A MONDAY OR A TUESDAY.

587. HIM I DIDN'T PUT YOU UP TO THAT.

588. CONVINCE HIM.

589. I'M TOTALLY SCREWED.

590. WAIT, HOLD ON.

591. HELLO.

592. Hi, this is Kathleen calling from Dr. Moriyama's office.

593. YEAH.

594. I'm just calling to confirm your acupuncture appointment.

595. UH, NO, I CAN'T DO IT.

596. Okay, the doctor just wants to know how you're feeling.

597. I'M BETTER.

598. That's good.

599. Uh, would you like to schedule another session?

600. UM, NO, NO.

601. NOT NOW.

602. Okay, thank you, Mr. David.

603. OKAY.

604. YOU GOT TO GET DOWN THERE.

605. YOU GOT TO DO SOMETHING.

606. HE'S HAVING, HE'S SUPPOSED

607. RESTAURANT LATER.

608. YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE THAT CAN FIX IT, YOU KNOW?

609. TALK TO HIM.

610. SHIT.

611. TO BE HELPFUL.

612. UH, MR. WEINER, I DON'T THINK

613. OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, YOU SHOULD, YOU SHOULD.

614. WELL, MAYBE AFTER.

615. BECAUSE IT'S A WONDERFUL PREFACE TO A GREAT JAPANESE MEAL.

616. OKAY. COME ON.

617. WELL, I THINK WE SHOULD GO AHEAD AND ORDER THEN, AT LEAST.

618. CERTAINLY.

619. MM-HMM.

620. FOR YOU FIRST...

621. WELL, FIRST A LITTLE SPICE.

622. LARRY?

623. HI.

624. HI.

625. DOING HERE?

626. FOR LAST NIGHT.

627. THAT I SAID TO YOU ABOUT...

628. OH, HE DIDN'T, NO, HE DIDN'T, HUH?

629. AND HE SHOULDN'T BE PUNISHED AS A RESULT OF WHAT I DID ON...

630. WHY, YOU SHIT.

631. OH, HI, HI, NICE TO SEE YOU.

632. HELLO.

633. OH, HI, CAROL.

634. UH, SO SORRY.

635. HI.

636. EVERYBODY, THIS IS LARRY DAVID.

637. ON "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE".

638. A LONG TIME AGO.

639. HERE'S HIS WIFE, CHERYL.

640. HI.

641. JEFF GREENE.

642. BE MY MANAGER.

643. SO SUDDEN, UNEXPECTED.

644. LARRY, YOU REMEMBER, MY COUSIN, DOUG...

645. FROM THE PARTY, THURSDAY?

646. SURE, HI, DOUG.

647. HI.

648. TO SEE HIM ALIVE.

649. WELL, TECHNICALLY IT WAS THE WAITER.

650. SO, YOU'RE THE ONE?

651. SO, WHAT DO YOU DO?

652. I'M A BUTTON MAN.

653. BUTTON MAN?

654. YES, I SELL BUTTONS TO THE CUT-UP TRADE.

655. GARMENT MANUFACTURERS.

656. STORY FOR YOU.

657. A BABY 15 YEARS AGO.

658. AND I WAS THE GODFATHER.

659. AND I DON'T KNOW,

660. IT SOMEHOW.

661. AND NOW THE KID WON'T EVEN TALK TO ME, IT'S...

662. THAT'S A SAD STORY, EXCUSE ME.

663. LARRY, LARRY.

664. THANK YOU.

665. BACK UP, MAN, YOU'RE RIGHT IN MY FACE.

666. OH, OKAY.

667. THERE IT IS.

668. I TOLD YOU, DON'T CASH IT FOR WEEK.

669. OH, THIS IS—

670. NO, I TOLD YOU YOU'D

671. IT HAPPEN.

672. I DIDN'T MAKE ANYTHING HAPPEN.

673. YOU KIND OF DID.

674. THAT'S JUST GREAT, LARRY, YOU GOT YOUR MONEY BACK.

675. WHAT?

676. THE CHECK.

677. WHAT CHECK?

678. TALKING ABOUT?

679. BARRY $5,000.

680. HIS DAD PASSED AWAY,

681. THE MONEY BACK.

682. EXCUSE ME, THERE WAS NO CONDITION.

683. OH, I GET IT, YOU TOOK $5,000, YOU'RE A BOUNTY HUNTER.

684. MY UNCLE FOR $5,000.

685. COME ON,

686. CONDITION, DIDN'T YOU?

687. WELL, I DIDN'T...

688. THROW THE WATER AT HIM?

689. I DIDN'T THROW THE WATER AT HIM, THE WAITER—

690. YOU'RE LYING.

691. THE WATER AT HIM.

692. I DIDN'T—

693. JEFF!

694. LET'S GO.

695. NO, YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, YOU KILLED MY UNCLE,

696. YOU MURDERER!

697. HEY!

698. STOP IT!

699. MY NECK, MY NECK.

700. LET GO OF HIM!

701. OH, LARRY-SAN.

702. HI.

703. WHO WAS THAT?

704. OH, I GOT LUCKY, MY WIFE.

705. YOUR WIFE?

706. YES.

707. WOW.

708. YES, WOW.

709. HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT?

710. GOOD FOR YOU.

711. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

712. AH, HOW ARE YOU?

713. IN A HEADLOCK.

714. I AM MUCH, MUCH WORSE.

715. WELL, I THINK WE CAN DO SOMETHING ABOUT THAT.

716. YOU'RE A VERY CONFIDENT MAN.

717. YOU REALLY ARE.

718. SAY, WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAKE ANOTHER DEAL ON THAT ONE?

719. ANOTHER ONE?

720. WELL, YOU ALREADY OWE ME 5,000 FOR THE OTHER ONE.

721. TO GET IT BACK, MAYBE?

722. I OWE YOU FIVE, HOW DO I OWE YOU FIVE?

723. I DON'T OWE YOU 5,000, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

724. WELL, MY RECEPTIONIST

725. ON THE PHONE.

726. YOU WERE BETTER.

727. I SAID...

728. YEAH, SHE ASKED ME HOW I WAS FEELING.

729. I SAID, BETTER.

730. BETTER THAN BEFORE, NOT 100% BETTER,

731. NOT ALL BETTER, BUT BETTER.

732. BETTER?

733. AFTER I TREATED YOU, YOU WERE BETTER, RIGHT?

734. IN ENGLISH, BETTER DOESN'T MEAN BETTER, COMPLETELY BETTER.

735. I DON'T, THERE'S A CONFUSION HERE,

736. A LANGUAGE CONFUSION.

737. BETTER IS NOT ALL BETTER, IT'S BETTER.

738. LARRY-SAN,

739. WAIT A MINUTE, YOU SAID BETTER.

740. BETTER IS BETTER, YOU SAID YOU WERE BETTER.

741. THIS, LARRY-SAN,

742. WITH MY FAMILY.

743. THIS AGREEMENT.

744. MY EMPLOYEES, MY BUSINESS.

745. AS MEN OF HONOR.

746. YOU OWE ME $5,000, I MADE YOU FEEL BETTER!

747. SO...

748. HOW DO YOU INTEND TO PAY?

749. I HAVE A...

750. CHECK...

751. FOR $5,000.

752. IT OVER TO YOU.

753. DON'T CASH IT FOR A WEEK.

754. FOR A WEEK?

755. OF COURSE, I'LL NEED A...

756. PICTURE ID.

757. SO, I GOT THE ORCHIDS.

758. OH.

759. THEY WERE SO NICE.

760. SENDING THEM.

761. FOR ALL YOUR PATIENTS?

762. SEND THEM...

763. ORCHIDS?

764. ANCIENT JAPANESE CUSTOM.

766. A Division of TIME WARNER ENTERTAINMENT COMPANY, L.P.

767. Captioned by