1. Captions made possible by
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2. ENTERTAINMENT COMPANY, L.P.
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3. I'M SO SORRY.
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4. SO MUCH FOR COMING.
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5. IT'S SO GOOD
TO SEE YOU.
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6. SO MUCH.
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7. THANK YOU.
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8. OH, GOSH, THANK YOU,
THANK YOU.
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9. LARRY, I'M SO SORRY
ABOUT YOUR AUNT.
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10. OH, YOU KNOW WHAT?
IT WAS CHERYL'S AUNT.
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11. BUT THANK YOU.
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12. DID YOU FLY IN
FROM FLORIDA?
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13. NO, NO, NO,
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14. HER SISTER'S BOYFRIEND
AND HER PARENTS FLEW IN.
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15. I LIVE HERE.
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16. OH, I SEE.
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17. CONDOLENCES.
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18. NICE SERVICE.
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19. YEAH.
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20. THE HOTEL ROOM.
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21. I APPRECIATE THAT.
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22. PLEASE,
MY PLEASURE.
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23. IT'S, UH, I WAS
GONNA ASK YOU,
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24. IS THAT MINI BAR,
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25. WITH THE WHOLE THING?
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26. SURE, WHATEVER
YOU WANT.
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27. OH, GREAT.
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28. YEAH,
HELP YOURSELF.
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29. SOME M&M's, YOU KNOW,
TOBLERONE.
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30. I DON'T DRINK.
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31. IT'S CHOCOLATE.
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32. HOW'S, UH, HOW'S
CHERYL HOLDING UP?
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33. SHE'S OKAY.
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34. YEAH.
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35. TRYING TO PUT THAT, UH,
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36. IN MY BELT.
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37. LOST WEIGHT OR SOMETHING.
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38. IT'S KILLING ME.
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39. WELL, UH,
IT'S A GOOD FAMILY.
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40. YEAH,
THEY'RE VERY NICE.
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41. BECKY'S
A NICE GIRL, RIGHT?
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42. BECKY? YEAH, SHE'S A DOLL,
SHE'S REALLY SWEET.
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43. HOW, HOW LONG
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44. GOT MARRIED?
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45. NOT THAT LONG,
REALLY.
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46. AND THEN, YOU KNOW,
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47. WE GOT MARRIED VERY QUICKLY.
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48. WANTS TO GET MARRIED.
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49. AND UH, I'M JUST NOT,
I'M NOT INTO IT.
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50. AND, UH, THE DAY
THAT WE GOT THE CALL,
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51. GONNA BREAK UP,
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52. TO BREAK UP WITH BECKY.
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53. HOLY COW, SO YOU
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54. TO ALREADY BE FREE.
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55. I MISSED IT...
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56. LIKE, BY
FIVE MINUTES.
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57. OH, MY GOSH.
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58. AND THEN YOU COULDN'T DO IT
AFTER SHE KILLED HERSELF.
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59. TO WAIT 'TIL THEY... ?
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60. UH-HUH.
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61. 'TIL I TELL HER?
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62. IF IT WAS HER MOTHER,
I WOULD SAY YOU'D HAVE TO
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63. AND WAIT MAYBE SIX DAYS.
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64. A WEEK.
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65. FOR AN AUNT?
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66. FOR AN AUNT WHO DOESN'T
EVEN LIVE WHERE YOU LIVE,
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67. WHO YOU DON'T
SEE THAT OFTEN,
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68. WHEN YOU GET HOME,
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69. WHEN YOU GET BACK,
WHEN YOU GET BACK TO FLORIDA.
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70. WHAT SHOULD I SAY?
I MEAN...
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71. YOU'RE NOT HAPPY.
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72. THAT'S VERY GOOD,
THAT WORKS.
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73. I'VE NEVER ACTUALLY
USED IT MYSELF,
BUT I THINK IT WORKS.
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74. OKAY.
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75. I'VE GOT
A BREATH PROBLEM,
WHAT— ?
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76. NO, I THOUGHT I SAW
A BUG, THAT'S CREEPY.
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77. ARIGHT, LISTEN, WE NEVER HAD
THIS CONVERSATION, BY THE WAY.
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78. NO.
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79. OKAY?
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80. I WON'T
SAY ANYTHING.
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81. YOUR ADVICE.
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82. WOW, I THINK
I GOT THE HEAT, UH,
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83. TURNED DOWN A BIT.
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84. TALKING ABOUT?
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85. LOUISE.
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86. IS HE OKAY?
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87. OH, YEAH.
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88. HOW BROKEN UP HE IS ABOUT THIS.
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89. HE'S BEEN VERY,
VERY QUIET FOR SEVERAL DAYS.
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90. THAT'S SO SWEET.
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91. THE SERVICE WAS WONDERFUL,
WASN'T IT?
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92. YEAH, IT WORKED OUT
NICELY.
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93. WELL,
THANK YOU.
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94. YOU KNOW WHAT?
HEY, LISTEN, YOU GUYS, UM,
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95. IN THE HOUSE,
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96. THAT'S FINE,
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
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97. IN THE HOTEL.
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98. OH, THAT'S
REALLY NICE.
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99. A NIGHT OR TWO.
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100. YEAH,
ONE NIGHT.
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101. THAT WOULD BE NICE,
BECAUSE WE HATE FLYING.
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102. LIKE TO FLY.
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103. YEAH, HEY, NOBODY
LIKES TO FLY.
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104. I DON'T EVEN
LIKE TO DRIVE.
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105. AND I DON'T
LIKE WALKING.
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106. SO OCCASIONALLY,
I DON'T REALLY KNOW
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107. I DON'T KNOW IF WE CAN
DO ANYTHING ABOUT THIS,
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108. THAT THERE WAS NO OBITUARY.
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109. OH, WOW, I DIDN'T EVEN
THINK OF THAT.
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110. LIKE SHE DIDN'T HAVE
A LIFE OUT HERE, YOU KNOW?
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111. MAKES IT REAL.
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112. YOU KNOW, MY FRIEND,
UH, MY MANAGER
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113. SOMEBODY AT THE PAPER.
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114. I'LL BET I COULD GET
SOMETHING IN THERE FOR YOU.
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115. SO GOOD.
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116. THAT'D BE
REALLY SWEET.
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117. YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'LL WRITE IT MYSELF.
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118. I'LL TAKE CARE
OF THE WHOLE THING.
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119. NO PROBLEM.
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120. THERE'S ANYTHING
YOU WANT TO ADD,
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121. YOU JUST TELL ME ABOUT IT,
AND I'LL GET IT IN.
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122. IT'S NOT GONNA
BE FUNNY, IS IT?
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123. MOM, PLEASE.
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124. WELL, THAT'S
WHAT HE DOES.
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125. NO, IT'S NOT
GONNA BE FUNNY.
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126. IT'LL BE VERY TASTEFUL
AND APPROPRIATE.
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127. DON'T WORRY,
IT'LL BE FINE.
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128. HE'S JUST A WRITER,
HE CAN DO ANYTHING.
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129. SO MUCH.
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130. WE LOVE YOU,
LARRY.
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131. I LOVE YOU, TOO.
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132. HEY.
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133. HEY!
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134. SORRY I'M LATE.
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135. HEY,
IT'S UNDERSTANDABLE.
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136. IT'S VERY HARD TO EXTRICATE
MYSELF FROM WARNER'S.
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137. WEARING THE TIE?
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138. YOU DON'T HAVE TO
WEAR IT ANYMORE.
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139. I DON'T KNOW.
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140. IF I DIDN'T HAVE TO,
I WOULDN'T.
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141. WELL, I MEAN, ONCE
YOU'VE GOT THE OUTFIT ON,
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142. WEAR IT TO ITS COMPLETION.
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143. MAINTAIN THE OUTFIT.
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144. "TO ITS COMPLETION."
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145. YEAH.
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146. HEY, SO YOU THINK
YOU CAN TAKE CARE OF THIS,
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147. THIS OBITUARY THING?
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148. REALLY?
DONE DEAL, MAN.
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149. 4:00 IS
THE DEADLINE.
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150. YOU GET IT TO ME BY 4:00
AND I'LL GET IT TO HIM.
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151. I'LL FAX IT OVER.
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152. NO PROBLEM.
THANKS SO MUCH.
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153. VERY NICE OF YOU.
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154. OH, WELL,
IT'S MY PLEASURE.
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155. THAT'LL SCORE SOME BIG POINTS
WITH THE FAMILY.
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156. HOW DID SHE DIE?
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157. KILLED HERSELF.
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158. NO, SHE DIDN'T.
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159. WHY?
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160. WHY? NOBODY KNOWS,
SHE DIDN'T LEAVE A NOTE.
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161. THAT IS SO RUDE,
ISN'T THAT?
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162. THAT'S REALLY RUDE.
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163. I MEAN, IF YOU LEAVE
YOUR HOUSE FOR 10 MINUTES
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164. TO GO GET
A CONTAINER OF MILK,
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165. WHERE YOU WENT, DON'T YOU?
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166. BEFORE I GO ANYWHERE.
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167. YEAH, WOULD IT HAVE KILLED HER
TO LEAVE A NOTE?
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168. I DON'T KNOW.
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169. UH, MY MOM'S IN TOWN
WITH MY DAD.
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170. IT'S HER BIRTHDAY.
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171. IT'D BE GREAT,
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172. CONSIDERING ALL THAT'S GONE DOWN
BETWEEN YOU AND MY PARENTS,
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173. IF, FOR MY MOM'S BIRTHDAY,
YOU GOT HER A LITTLE GIFT,
A LITTLE SOMETHING.
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174. DOESN'T MATTER WHAT IT IS,
IT'S A NICE GESTURE.
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175. IT REALLY IS.
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176. ANY IDEAS?
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177. NO.
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178. OKAY.
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179. GOOD.
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180. HEY, LET'S DO THIS
OBITUARY THING, OKAY?
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181. ALRIGHT.
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182. YOU HAVE A PAD?
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183. OKAY.
YEAH, I GOT A PAD.
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184. UM, LOUISE HOENIN.
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185. H-O-E-N-I-N.
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186. DEVOTED SISTER,
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187. BELOVED AUNT.
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188. UNDISCLOSED CAUSES...
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189. 20 MINUTES, DOOR TO DOOR.
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190. DID VERY WELL.
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191. YEAH, THAT'S UNUSUAL.
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192. I WASN'T WORRIED
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193. ON MY RENTAL CAR.
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194. I WOULDN'T CARE
HOW LONG IT WAS.
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195. THAT'S GOOD.
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196. WAS VIRTUALLY EMPTY.
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197. IN TRAFFIC FOR HOURS.
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198. YEAH.
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199. YOU CAN HARDLY BREATHE.
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200. I'M GLAD
I DON'T LIVE HERE.
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201. DO YOU THINK BECKY'S
COMING DOWN PRETTY SOON?
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202. OH, I THINK SO.
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203. SHE'S BEEN ON THE PHONE
ALL MORNING WITH HER, UH,
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204. BOYFRIEND, WELL,
NOW HER EX-BOYFRIEND.
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205. LAST NIGHT AND...
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206. ISN'T THAT AWFUL?
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207. I MEAN, WHAT KIND OF TIMING—
IT'S UNBELIEVABLE.
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208. LOUSY.
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209. SO I THINK I'M GONNA
GO OUT FOR AWHILE.
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210. IS THAT OKAY?
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211. YOU GOING?
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212. PLAYING SOME GOLF.
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213. ARE YOU JOKING?
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214. WELL, I'M NOT CONTRIBUTING
ANYTHING HERE.
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215. YES, YOU ARE.
I'M DETRACTING.
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216. I'M A MINUS HERE,
I'M NOT A PLUS.
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217. IF YOUR AUNT DIED,
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218. TO SUPPORT YOU.
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219. HEY, IF MY AUNT
KILLED HERSELF,
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220. TO LEAVE THE HOUSE.
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221. I'D SAY GO,
GO HAVE SOME FUN.
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222. YOU DON'T HAVE TO
STAY HERE AND MOURN.
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223. AROUND TO MOURN?
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224. YOU'RE NOT
GOING GOLFING.
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225. WELL, I KNOW WE'RE ALL
GOING TO MISS LOUISE.
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226. OH, YEAH.
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227. VERY MUCH SO.
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228. MM-HMM.
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229. TO CONTINUE.
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230. WE MUST GO ON.
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231. WE MUST GO ON.
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232. CAN'T GO ON.
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233. MUST GO ON.
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234. WELL, YOU KNOW,
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235. AND YOU'VE GOTTA
HAVE A SMILE.
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236. YOU KNOW, YOU GET OVER
A LOT OF THINGS THAT WAY.
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237. YEAH, I ONCE PERFORMED
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238. WHEN HE WAS ON HIS DEATHBED.
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239. TO DO FIVE MINUTES.
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240. AND, UH, I BOMBED,
ACTUALLY,
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241. AND HE GOT
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242. RESUSCITATE HIM, BUT...
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243. YOU KNOW WHO'S FUNNY?
THAT CARROT TOP.
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244. THAT GUY?
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245. ONCE IN AWHILE.
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246. BIG MOP
OF RED HAIR.
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247. OH, MY GOSH!
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248. THE OBITUARY!
DO WE HAVE THE PAPER?
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249. OH, YEAH, WE WANT
TO LOOK AT THAT.
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250. OKAY.
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251. I'LL GO
GET THE PAPER.
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252. NO, DON'T YOU BOTHER,
I'VE GOT THE CAR.
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253. YOU DON'T EVEN
KNOW WHERE IT IS.
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254. I HAVE UNLIMITED MILEAGE,
I CAN DRIVE ANYWHERE.
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255. NO, HE KNOWS
WHAT HE'S DOING.
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256. IT'S RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER,
HE'LL FIND IT.
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257. I'M SURE
HE WILL.
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258. TO USE THE RENTAL CAR.
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259. MM-HMM.
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260. BECAUSE HE'S NOT
SITTING THERE ANYMORE.
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261. MORE ROOM HERE.
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262. OH, THAT'S OKAY.
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263. PRETTY GOOD.
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264. YEAH.
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265. GET IN MY MOUTH AT ONE TIME?
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266. SIX.
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267. YOU SAY SIX?
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268. FIVE.
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269. THREE, FOUR.
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270. TO MY SANTINO.
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271. GLADYS, GEORGE...
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272. LOOK WHAT THEY DID.
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273. OH, SUGAR.
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274. OH, NO,
BECKY.
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275. OH, NO.
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276. OH, MY GOSH.
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277. OH, WHAT DID HE SAY?
WHAT HAPPENED?
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278. ABOUT NOT BEING HAPPY.
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279. WE COULD'VE
WORKED THROUGH THAT.
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280. OF THIS GUY!
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281. JERK.
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282. TIMING IS THIS?
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283. MY AUNT!
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284. I KNOW.
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285. WITH ME?
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286. YOU DON'T DO THAT
TO SOMEBODY, NO.
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287. THAT'S SO AWFUL.
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288. I MEAN,
HE REALLY LOVED ME.
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289. YEAH.
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290. DID HE SAY
ANYTHING TO YOU?
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291. I KNOW HOW MUCH HE LIKES YOU,
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292. NO, WE JUST, UH,
YOU KNOW,
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293. AND, THE MINI BAR.
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294. THE MINI BAR?
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295. OH, GOSH,
OH, GOSH.
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296. RIDICULOUS.
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297. YOU GOING?
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298. I'VE GOT TO GET
FOR JEFF'S MOTHER.
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299. I'M SORRY, I FORGOT,
TODAY'S HER BIRTHDAY.
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300. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK,
I'M SORRY.
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301. OH, GOD, ALRIGHT, I'M GONNA
BE BACK IN 20 MINUTES.
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302. EVERYBODY, EVERYBODY
STAY HERE, OKAY?
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303. GLADYS, YOU'RE HERE,
OKAY, BARBARA?
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304. GEORGE,
RIGHT HERE.
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305. GLADYS,
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
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306. I'M JUST GONNA
GET A BIRTHDAY PRESENT.
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307. 40 MINUTES AT THE MOST.
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308. 45 MINUTES.
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309. UM, I'D LIKE TO BUY
A PAIR OF SUNGLASSES.
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310. IT'S A BIRTHDAY
PRESENT.
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311. OKAY.
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312. FOR MY FRIEND'S
MOTHER.
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313. OH, THIS ONE
I LIKE A LOT.
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314. THESE ARE GREAT.
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315. WEARS THESE GLASSES.
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316. SAME GLASSES.
YOU'RE KIDDING!
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317. MIRROR OVER THERE.
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318. THEY'RE VERY
IN VOGUE RIGHT NOW.
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319. THEY ARE?
YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
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320. YOU SEE WHY?
OH, YEAH.
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321. I LIKE THAT.
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322. THEY'RE PERFECT.
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323. BEAUTIFUL.
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324. ALRIGHT.
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325. REALLY?
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326. YEAH, SURE,
COME ON.
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327. ALRIGHT, LET ME
GET YOU A CASE.
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328. I DON'T FOOL AROUND.
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329. GIVE YOU A CASE,
I'LL THROW IN
SOME LENS CLEANER.
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330. TO PAY FOR THESE?
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331. OKAY.
CREDIT CARD.
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332. UM, CAN YOU
GIFT WRAP THESE?
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333. NO, I'M SORRY,
WE DON'T WRAP.
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334. WELL, HOW WOULD ONE GO ABOUT
GETTING THIS GIFT WRAPPED?
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335. AND WRAP IT.
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336. OKAY, WHERE WOULD I
GET THE PAPER?
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337. YOU KNOW, THERE'S
A CARD STORE UPSTAIRS.
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338. MAYBE GO THERE.
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339. AND WHAT ABOUT, WOULD THEY HAVE,
YOU NEED A SCISSOR, TOO, RIGHT?
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340. A SCISSOR.
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341. TO CUT THE PAPER, RIGHT?
AND ALSO...
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342. TO CUT
THE PAPER, YEAH.
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343. AND SCOTCH TAPE,
TOO, RIGHT?
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344. RIGHT.
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345. IN THE SAME STORE?
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346. NO, I DON'T
BELIEVE THEY DO.
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347. YOU COULD CHECK.
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348. IF YOU'RE GONNA
GO GET THAT STUFF,
YOU MIGHT WANNA GET A BOW.
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349. AND A CARD.
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350. A BOW AND A CARD?
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351. WELL, YEAH, SO SHE KNOWS
WHO THE GIFT IS FROM.
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352. I'M GONNA BE
HANDING HER THE GIFT.
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353. ISN'T IT OBVIOUS
WHO IT'S FROM?
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354. YOU DON'T HAVE TO HAVE A CARD,
I'M JUST SAYING.
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355. WHAT A PROCESS THIS IS,
A BOW AND A CARD...
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356. THE BOW AND THE CARD?
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357. AND THE SCOTCH TAPE?
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358. NO, THE CARD—
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359. ARE WE TALKING ABOUT HERE?
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360. DON'T KNOW.
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361. BOY, THIS IS
VERY COMPLICATED.
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362. WHAT?
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363. WHAT, WHAT?
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364. WHAT?
WE GOT A PAPER,
THAT'S WHAT.
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365. "DEVOTED SISTER,
BELOVED CUNT"?
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366. HUH?
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367. THAT'S WHAT YOU PUT
IN THE PAPER?
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368. THIS IS A TYPO.
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369. THAT'S AUNT,
IT SHOULD BE AUNT!
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370. BEFORE HE TURNED IT IN?
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371. NO, THEY HAVE PROOFREADERS
AT THESE PAPERS!
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372. AND THIS IS HOW SHE ENDS UP?
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373. "BELOVED CUNT"?
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374. OH!
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375. MY WIFE IS UPSET!
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376. I'M JUST GLAD YOU WEREN'T
IN CHARGE OF THE HEADSTONE!
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377. I MEANT BELOVED AUNT,
NOT BELOVED CUNT!
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378. LARRY.
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379. DON'T KEEP
SAYING IT!
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380. PLEASE.
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381. I'M SO SORRY,
I'M SO SORRY.
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382. IT'S A TYPO.
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383. DON'T YOU SEE?
IT'S A TYPO!
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384. IT'S A TYPO,
IT'S AUNT!
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385. CHERYL!
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386. HEY, LARRY, EXCUSE ME
FOR A SECOND, CHERYL.
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387. WITH CRAIG AND I, UH,
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388. WANTED TO RUN THIS BY YOU,
SEE IF IT RINGS ANY BELLS.
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389. "IT WASN'T HER MOTHER WHO DIED,
IT WAS JUST HER AUNT.
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390. "YOU SHOULD BREAK UP
WITH HER TODAY.
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391. YOU DON'T LOOK HAPPY,
YOU SHOULD BREAK UP!"
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392. WHAT?
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393. YEAH, THAT'S
WHAT HE SAID!
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394. OH, MY GOD, DID YOU TELL CRAIG
TO BREAK UP WITH BECKY?
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395. AT THE FUNERAL,
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396. BUT I TOLD HIM TO WAIT 'TIL
HE GOT BACK TO TALLAHASSEE!
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397. I DIDN'T SAY TO DO IT
LAST NIGHT AT THE WAKE!
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398. OH, WELL,
NEVER MIND!
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399. THE MATTER WITH YOU?
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400. HE'S A BAD GUY,
I WAS DOING YOU A FAVOR!
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401. OKAY, LARRY, I THINK
YOU SHOULD JUST LEAVE!
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402. FOR TONIGHT?
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403. AT LEAST,
PLEASE.
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404. I AM SORRY.
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405. CHERYL,
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406. GET THIS GIFT WRAPPED?
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407. HEY, LET ME
ASK YOU SOMETHING.
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408. GETTING THIS GIFT WRAPPED?
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409. UM, WELL, UH,
IF YOU, UH,
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410. THE PAPER?
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411. NO, I DON'T
HAVE ANYTHING.
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412. A STATIONARY STORE.
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413. YEAH, STATIONARY STORE
FOR THE SCISSOR AND THE TAPE,
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414. SOMEPLACE ELSE FOR THE PAPER.
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415. YEAH, DEPENDING ON
WHAT KIND OF PAPER YOU WANT.
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416. I DON'T GIVE A SHIT,
ANY KIND OF PAPER.
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417. GO TO, LIKE, A PARTY STORE,
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418. GIFT WRAPPING PAPER,
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419. AT, LIKE,
A PARTY STORE.
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420. BUT THEY DON'T HAVE
THE TAPE AND SCISSOR.
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421. I DON'T KNOW,
THEY MIGHT,
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422. I WOULDN'T BET ON IT,
I WOULD BRING MY OWN.
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423. WELL, LET ME
ASK YOU A QUESTION.
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424. THAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT...
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425. RIGHT, THEY HAVE
THE PAPER THERE.
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426. WRAP IT FOR ME?
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427. THEY MIGHT,
HONESTY, I DON'T KNOW
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428. WRAPS EVERYTHING.
Copy !req
429. BUT IF YOU BRING IT WITH YOU,
IF YOU HAVE IT THERE,
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430. I DON'T KNOW,
Copy !req
431. TIP THEM OR SOMETHING.
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432. HEY, LET ME
ASK YOU SOMETHING.
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433. LIKE THIS GIFT WRAPPED?
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434. OR SOMETHING.
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435. YEAH, STATIONARY
STORE.
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436. THAT'S FOR
THE PAPER, RIGHT?
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437. BUT THEY DON'T HAVE
THE SCISSORS AND THE TAPE.
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438. YEAH, THEY WILL.
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439. AND TAPE?
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440. YEAH.
REALLY?
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441. AND CARDS.
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442. YEAH, THEY HAVE
EVERYTHING THERE.
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443. SO, HALLMARK HAS
THAT WHOLE THING THERE?
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444. WHERE'S THE HALLMARK?
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445. I DON'T KNOW.
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446. THIS PUMP OVER HERE.
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447. ALRIGHT, FORGET IT,
I'M ALL DONE HERE.
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448. YOU DON'T KNOW
WHERE THE HALLMARK IS.
Copy !req
449. SO, MOM, I THOUGHT MAYBE
TOMORROW IF YOU'RE UP TO IT,
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450. WE'D GO TO
THE OUTLET CENTER.
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451. ALRIGHT.
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452. HI!
LOOK WHO'S HERE.
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453. HELLO.
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454. LARRY, HI.
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455. HI.
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456. BE NICE.
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457. HI.
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458. HI.
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459. HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
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460. HEY!
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461. SWEET OF YOU.
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462. WHAT KIND OF PRESENT IS THAT?
NOT WRAPPED NICELY.
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463. YEAH,
I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT.
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464. I LOOKED IN STORES,
I COULDN'T FIND
ANY WRAPPING STORE.
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465. YOU KNOW, THERE'S NO
WRAPPING STORES ANYWHERE?
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466. OH, MY GOSH!
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467. SUNGLASSES!
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468. WOW, LOOK AT THOSE.
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469. OH, MY GOSH,
LOOK AT THIS!
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470. YOU KNOW WHAT?
ELIZABETH TAYLOR WEARS GLASSES,
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471. EXACT, SHE HAS
THE EXACT SAME GLASSES!
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472. YOU HEAR THAT?
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473. I CAN'T USE 'EM.
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474. I, I HAVE A PRESCRIPTION
IN MY LENSES.
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475. I'M SORRY.
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476. ALRIGHT, NO, NO,
I'LL GET—
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477. I'LL TAKE CARE
OF IT.
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478. I WANT TO DO IT,
I WANT TO DO IT.
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479. I'LL GET
LENSES PUT IN.
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480. YOU'LL GIVE ME
Copy !req
481. AND WE'LL MAKE THEM
PRESCRIPTION GLASSES.
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482. ISN'T THAT NICE?
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483. OH, HOW DID
THE OBIT GO?
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484. YOU GOT A PAPER?
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485. YEAH,
IT'S OVER THERE.
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486. OBITUARIES...
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487. IT'S IN
THE BACK THERE.
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488. HERE, I'LL SHOW YOU
HOW IT WENT.
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489. HERE,
HERE'S HOW IT WENT.
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490. "LOUISE HOENIN,
DEVOTED SISTER, BELOVED CUNT" ?
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491. WHAT?
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492. JEFFREY, IT SAYS THAT
IN THE PAPER?
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493. LET ME SEE THIS.
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494. THAT'S
UNBELIEVABLE!
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495. I KNOW!
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496. THAT'S UNBELIEVABLE!
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497. YOU SAID AUNT,
I WROTE DOWN AUNT!
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498. THAT'S BULLSHIT!
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499. DON'T THEY
PROOFREAD THESE THINGS?
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500. I AM
SO SORRY.
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501. OH, GOD,
LARRY.
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502. YEAH, I NEED A LETTER OF APOLOGY
Copy !req
503. RETRACTION,
RETRACTION.
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504. GONNA SAY?
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505. "WE'RE SORRY
WE CALLED HER A CUNT,
WE MEANT AUNT" ?
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506. POINT WELL TAKEN,
I'LL HAVE THEM WRITE
A LETTER OF APOLOGY.
Copy !req
507. AND YOU, TOO.
Copy !req
508. I'LL WRITE ONE, TOO,
I PROMISE.
Copy !req
509. YEAH, STILL,
TO PRINT THIS.
Copy !req
510. SO UPSET.
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511. OUT OF THE HOUSE.
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512. SHE KICKED YOU OUT?
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513. HER RELATIVES ARE THERE,
HER PARENTS, FRIENDS,
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514. GONNA KILL ME.
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515. YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU'LL STAY HERE.
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516. I CAN'T STAY HERE,
I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR.
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517. I'VE GOT PLENTY OF STUFF
FOR YOU TO WEAR!
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518. NO, LARRY,
YOU'LL STAY HERE.
Copy !req
519. YOU KNOW, MOM AND DAD
ARE HERE ANYWAY.
Copy !req
520. IT'S NO BIG DEAL,
I'M MAKING A GREAT DINNER.
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521. YOU'LL STAY HERE TONIGHT,
I'M SO SORRY.
Copy !req
522. AND PERSONALLY APOLOGIZE.
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523. I WILL,
I WILL.
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524. DO ME A FAVOR.
Copy !req
525. WHEN I DIE, LET SOMEONE ELSE
HANDLE THE OBIT, OKAY?
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526. HEY, HOW MUCH LONGER
'TIL DINNER?
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527. OH, 25 MINUTES,
30, TOPS.
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528. DAD, LET'S GO
FINISH THE MOVIE, COME ON.
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529. WHAT MOVIE?
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530. LARRY, LET ME SEE
THOSE GLASSES AGAIN.
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531. THOSE SUNGLASSES.
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532. OKAY, SURE.
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533. I CAN'T SEE THROUGH THEM,
BUT I CAN GET AN IDEA.
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534. THEY'RE BEAUTIES.
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535. I'M TELLING YOU,
ELIZABETH TAYLOR.
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536. OH, WAIT,
WAIT A MINUTE.
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537. SEE MY REFLECTION IN HERE.
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538. OH, WAIT, HOLD IT,
I'LL HELP YOU OUT HERE.
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539. GOOD.
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540. UH-HUH.
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541. HMM.
Copy !req
542. UM, ALRIGHT, SO I'LL GET
THE PRESCRIPTION FOR THIS THING.
Copy !req
543. WE'LL GET THAT
TAKEN CARE OF.
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544. IT SHOULDN'T TAKE
TOO LONG, YOU KNOW?
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545. THEY LOOK GOOD,
THOUGH.
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546. SEE, MOM, I TOLD YOU HE'S GOT
A VERY, VERY SWEET SIDE.
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547. VERY.
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548. YEAH?
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549. YOU GOTTA GO.
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550. WHAT?
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551. YOU GOTTA GO.
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552. ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
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553. YOU COPPED A FEEL OFF MY MOM,
YOU GOTTA GO.
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554. I COPPED A FEEL OFF YOUR MOM,
WHAT ARE YOU SAYING TO ME?
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555. SHE'S WALKING AROUND,
MOPING AROUND,
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556. I'M SAYING,
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
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557. SHE SAID,
"LARRY TOUCHED MY BOSOM
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558. FOR SEVERAL SECONDS."
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559. SCHMUCK!
FOR A SECOND?
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560. WHAT?
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561. WE'RE IN THE KITCHEN.
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562. THE SUNGLASSES AGAIN, OKAY?
Copy !req
563. AND I WAS HOLDING THE TOASTER,
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564. THE BACK OF MY HAND,
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565. AND SO, I DIDN'T
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566. I DIDN'T WANT TO
BY JUST TAKING IT AWAY FAST.
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567. I'M SORRY.
Copy !req
568. SHE'S ALL FREAKED OUT.
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569. YOU GOTTA GO.
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570. YOU'RE KICKING ME OUT?
IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE DOING?
Copy !req
571. ALRIGHT, LOOK, LOOK,
LOOK, LOOK, LOOK, LOOK, LOOK...
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572. SET THE ALARM, DO YOU KNOW
HOW TO SET THE ALARM?
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573. SEVEN A.M.
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574. THE BACK OF MY HAND!
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575. I BELIEVE YOU,
IT'S NOT ABOUT THAT!
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576. FEELING UP OLD LADIES?
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577. I APOLOGIZED,
IT'S NOT ABOUT THAT!
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578. SHH, IT'S NOT
ABOUT THAT.
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579. BUT LISTEN TO ME.
Copy !req
580. AT SEVEN IN THE MORNING.
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581. ALRIGHT, I'LL BE OUT OF HERE
EARLY IN THE MORNING.
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582. THERE'S BAGELS IN THE KITCHEN,
GRAB ONE AND GET OUT.
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583. I WON'T GRAB ANYTHING,
I'LL JUST WALK OUT THE DOOR.
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584. I TOUCHED HER BREAST?
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585. THAT IS SO SICK.
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586. IT'S WHAT SHE THINKS,
WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY?
Copy !req
587. SWEET DREAMS.
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588. SWEET DREAMS.
Copy !req
589. I'LL DREAM ABOUT
FUCKING YOUR MOTHER,
SWEET DREAMS.
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590. YOU!
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591. SHH, QUIET.
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592. HOW DARE YOU.
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593. I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.
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594. WHAT HAPPENED.
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595. WHAT, YOU THINK I ENJOY
THAT KIND OF THING?
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596. NO, OF COURSE NOT,
DON'T BE RIDICULOUS,
I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.
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597. THIS HAS GOTTA STOP.
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598. I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING?
Copy !req
599. MA, MA,
HE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.
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600. AND THE HAND.
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601. AGAINST ME.
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602. SHH, YOU'RE GONNA
WAKE UP SAMMY.
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603. SHH!
Copy !req
604. DID YOU SEE
WHAT HE DID?
Copy !req
605. IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.
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606. IT WAS
AN ACCIDENT.
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607. OH, HOW CONVENIENT.
Copy !req
608. IT WAS AN ACCIDENT,
YOU RUBBED UP AGAINST ME.
Copy !req
609. HUMAN BEING ARE YOU?
Copy !req
610. YES, YOU PUSHED UP
AGAINST MY HAND!
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611. I DIDN'T
DO ANYTHING!
Copy !req
612. IT WAS
AN ACCIDENT.
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613. YOU GOTTA GO,
YOU HAVE TO GO.
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614. IT'S BETTER, LARRY.
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615. OKAY, MA?
HE'S GONNA LEAVE.
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616. GO BACK TO SLEEP.
Copy !req
617. SICK PERSON.
Copy !req
618. ENOUGH OF THE "SICK PERSON",
HE'S NOT A SICK PERSON.
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619. HEY.
Copy !req
620. I'M REALLY SORRY.
Copy !req
621. THIS IS HORRIBLE,
I'M SO SORRY.
Copy !req
622. ACCEPT MY APOLOGY.
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623. WELL, I MEAN, YOU KNOW,
IT'S NOT YOU.
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624. I'LL STRAIGHTEN
IT OUT TOMORROW.
Copy !req
625. YOU KNOW, THEY GET
A LITTLE CRAZY, MY PARENTS.
Copy !req
626. I'M SORRY.
Copy !req
627. IT'S AN AWFUL THING.
Copy !req
628. I MEAN, EVEN
WHEN I WAS DATING,
Copy !req
629. AND MAKE A BREAST MOVE,
YOU KNOW?
Copy !req
630. I UNDERSTAND.
Copy !req
631. AND IT WOULDN'T BE
Copy !req
632. I KNOW,
IT'S HORRIBLE.
Copy !req
633. I'LL TAKE OF IT ALL TOMORROW,
I'LL SMOOTH IT ALL OVER.
Copy !req
634. DO ME A FAVOR.
Copy !req
635. OF THE SUNGLASSES.
Copy !req
636. THE SUNGLASSES?
Copy !req
637. YEAH, GIVE THEM TO ME,
LET ME TAKE CARE OF THEM.
Copy !req
638. GIVE HER A GIFT NOW?
Copy !req
639. YOU GAVE IT TO HER.
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640. ENTERTAINING EVENING?
Copy !req
641. YOU GAVE IT TO HER.
Copy !req
642. NO, I DON'T
THINK SO.
Copy !req
643. NO, NO, NO, NO.
Copy !req
644. THAT'S CALLED
"INDIAN GIVING".
Copy !req
645. YES, I KNOW
WHAT IT'S CALLED.
Copy !req
646. IT'S A VERY RACIST TERM,
BUT I'M OKAY WITH THAT.
Copy !req
647. DO WITH THEM?
Copy !req
648. POSSIBLY DO WITH THEM?
Copy !req
649. I'LL GIVE THEM TO
SOMEBODY WHO LIKES ME.
Copy !req
650. GOING NOW?
Copy !req
651. I DON'T KNOW,
I CAN'T GO HOME.
Copy !req
652. GUESS I'LL GO
TO A HOTEL.
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653. HOLLYWOOD ROOSEVELT HOTEL,
HOW CAN I HELP YOU?
Copy !req
654. I'LL SEE YOU THIS EVENING,
THANK YOU.
Copy !req
655. WELCOME TO THE ROOSEVELT,
HOW CAN I HELP YOU?
Copy !req
656. I'D LIKE
A ROOM, PLEASE.
Copy !req
657. I'M VERY SORRY,
WE'RE COMPLETELY FILLED
TO CAPACITY THIS EVENING.
Copy !req
658. OKAY.
Copy !req
659. THERE'S A GUY IN THIS HOTEL,
HIS NAME'S CRAIG BUTLER.
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660. MM-HMM.
Copy !req
661. OKAY, I'M PAYING
FOR HIS ROOM.
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662. I DON'T WANT TO
PAY FOR IT ANYMORE.
Copy !req
663. WAKE HIM UP,
GET HIM OUT,
THAT'S MY ROOM.
Copy !req
664. OKAY, UM, THIS ROOM IS
PAID FOR THROUGH TOMORROW.
Copy !req
665. RUN FOR THIS EVENING,
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666. SO HE'S AUTHORIZED
Copy !req
667. 'TIL ELEVEN A,M,
TOMORROW MORNING,
CHECK OUT TIME.
Copy !req
668. TO WORK OUT THE BILL WITH YOU,
Copy !req
669. IF YOU COME BACK TOMORROW,
HE COMES ON AT TEN.
Copy !req
670. YOU DON'T HAVE A ROOM FOR ME
IN THIS HOTEL TONIGHT?
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671. NOT ONE ROOM?
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672. DON'T YOU ALWAYS KEEP
EXTRA ROOMS FOR PEOPLE?
Copy !req
673. NOT ONE ROOM.
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674. YOU'RE NOT THE FIRST PERSON
WE'VE TURNED AWAY.
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675. I'M FRANK SINATRA, JR.,
YOU'RE TURNING ME AWAY TONIGHT,
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676. JR. WALKS IN HERE
AND YOU'RE TURNING HIM AWAY?
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677. YES, SIR,
UNFORTUNATELY.
Copy !req
678. THE POPE, THE POPE IS BEING
JUST SHOOED OUT INTO THE STREET.
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679. YOU'RE SHOOING THE POPE OUT,
IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE GONNA DO?
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680. YES, SIR.
Copy !req
681. TO CAPACITY, SIR.
Copy !req
682. A PAIR OF SUNGLASSES?
Copy !req
683. EXCUSE ME?
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684. SUNGLASSES, HERE.
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685. YEAH.
Copy !req
686. SUNGLASSES.
Copy !req
687. THEY'RE VERY NICE, SIR—
Copy !req
688. WEARS THESE SUNGLASSES.
Copy !req
689. THANK YOU, SIR,
I WEAR PRESCRIPTION.
Copy !req
690. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
Copy !req
691. THE SEINFELD SHOW?
Copy !req
692. YES, SIR.
Copy !req
693. JUST CURIOUS.
Copy !req
694. HEY, LARRY!
Copy !req
695. OH, HEY, LARRY, HI!
Copy !req
696. HI, BUDDY.
Copy !req
697. THIS IS LARRY?
Copy !req
698. RATTING ME OUT TO BECKY,
Copy !req
699. APPRECIATED IT.
Copy !req
700. I DID NOT
RAT YOU OUT.
Copy !req
701. WE TALKED ABOUT.
Copy !req
702. NOT TO SAY ANYTHING.
Copy !req
703. WELL, THAT'S
YOUR PROBLEM.
Copy !req
704. WHAT A JERK.
Copy !req
705. OH, I'M A JERK?
Copy !req
706. IS THAT RIGHT?
Copy !req
707. OH, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO,
BEAT ME UP?
Copy !req
708. MAYBE I WILL.
Copy !req
709. GO AHEAD,
TAKE A SHOT.
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710. YOU HOLLYWOOD PEOPLE.
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711. GUYS, GUYS, GUYS,
GENTLEMEN,
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712. THE TWO OF YOU
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713. YELLING AT EACH OTHER.
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714. RIGHT,
I AM SORRY, SIR.
Copy !req
715. EXCUSE ME,
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716. AT THE HOTEL THIS EVENING?
Copy !req
717. YES, I AM.
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718. ROOM KEY, PLEASE?
Copy !req
719. YES, SURE.
Copy !req
720. I'M PAYING
FOR THAT.
Copy !req
721. EXCUSE ME,
ONE AT A TIME.
Copy !req
722. GO BACK TO YOUR ROOM NOW.
Copy !req
723. VERY GOOD, THANK YOU,
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
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724. HE'S HERE BECAUSE
I'M PAYING FOR HIM.
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725. SIR, DO YOU HAVE A ROOM KEY
HERE AT THE ROOSEVELT?
Copy !req
726. NO.
Copy !req
727. ASK YOU TO LEAVE.
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728. SIR.
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729. IN SOME SUNGLASSES?
Copy !req
730. NO, JUST LEAVE,
PLEASE.
Copy !req
731. Captions Copyright 2000
Copy !req
732. A Division of TIME WARNER
ENTERTAINMENT COMPANY, L.P.
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733. Captioned by
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