1. Previously on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend...Copy !req
2. Greg, listen, I care about you.Copy !req
3. Tell me... Tell me how you feel,
if you have any feelings.Copy !req
4. I need to— I need to take a nap.
I need to take a nap.Copy !req
5. Greg?Copy !req
6. Rebecca, no matter what I do...Copy !req
7. I feel you with me.Copy !req
8. Why don't you leave a few things here?Copy !req
9. I have plenty of room.
Just put it in one of my drawers.Copy !req
10. Is that Greg's sweatshirt?Copy !req
11. I am looking for Greg.Copy !req
12. I really need to find him.Copy !req
13. I need to speak to your son, Greg.Copy !req
14. Look, there he is. There he is!Copy !req
15. Hi, I'm Greg and I'm an alcoholic.Copy !req
16. I'm addicted to her life.
It's like I did another fistful of blow.Copy !req
17. - What's this?
- Okay.Copy !req
18. Just a simple contract
laying out the terms of our friendship.Copy !req
19. It stipulates that my services
as a friend excludes shenanigans.Copy !req
20. There's just still
something missing in my life.Copy !req
21. I just— And I don't know what it is.Copy !req
22. Once I took my very first drink,
I felt bulletproof.Copy !req
23. For the first time in my life,
I didn't care about anything,Copy !req
24. about how people felt, about how I felt,Copy !req
25. about what was going on
with my mom and dad.Copy !req
26. Alcohol became my shield...
and it worked.Copy !req
27. At least, I thought it worked
until 27 days ago.Copy !req
28. - Thanks for bringing the donuts this week.
- You bet, man.Copy !req
29. - And thank you for sharing, dude.
- Aw, thanks, Guardrail.Copy !req
30. "Guardrail." Is that because
you were conceived on the open road?Copy !req
31. No, my buddy Throttle gave me that nameCopy !req
32. because I was so overprotective
of my coke.Copy !req
33. Those were the days.
So, things going okay?Copy !req
34. With me? Yeah.
Weirdly enough, I'm doing all right.Copy !req
35. Feel my feelings, yada, yada.Copy !req
36. I remember how good I felt
when I first got sober.Copy !req
37. - Almost euphoric.
- Exactly.Copy !req
38. Then I found it was just a phase.
We call it the pink cloud.Copy !req
39. When that went away,
I had to deal with some rough stuff.Copy !req
40. Listen, thank you for the indirect
passive-aggressive warning,Copy !req
41. but I'm coming to the meetings,
I'm doing great.Copy !req
42. Hey, tell you what, how about
I bring the donuts next time?Copy !req
43. Uh...Copy !req
44. Okay. Cool. You know,
we really love our donuts here.Copy !req
45. I'm on it. What could possibly stop me?Copy !req
46. Oh, hey, Josh! How was karate?
Were you the best one there?Copy !req
47. Becks, the only person I'm trying to be
better than is the person I was yesterday.Copy !req
48. - Mm.
- And today, I kicked Yesterday Josh's ass.Copy !req
49. Yeah, you did! Oh! Oh...Copy !req
50. - Mm, what smells so good?
- Oh, I made you something.Copy !req
51. It's called noodle kugel.
It's a Jewish thing.Copy !req
52. I figured— I've had your people's food.
You've never had my people's food.Copy !req
53. It's delicious. It's my Bubbe's recipe.Copy !req
54. Bubbe would've hated you.
She was really racist.Copy !req
55. It was a different time, but still wrong.Copy !req
56. - Anyway, you hungry?
- Ugh, I'm sorry. I didn't know.Copy !req
57. I had a sushi burrito after karate.Copy !req
58. Oh!Copy !req
59. - That's okay. No worries.
- See, that's what I love about you.Copy !req
60. - You love me?
- Love about you.Copy !req
61. "Love about me."
Right, right, right. Got it.Copy !req
62. Like, I know that you're not gonna get mad
because I didn't eat the Jewish noodles.Copy !req
63. We're independent. You know,
we come together when we want to,Copy !req
64. and when we don't,
we stay in our own lanes.Copy !req
65. Lanes, exactly. Exactly.
All right, so, no kugel for now.Copy !req
66. Do you want to watch a movie,Copy !req
67. just like in a chilling
in our own lanes type of way?Copy !req
68. It's just— I don't know— I feel like
I haven't seen you in forever.Copy !req
69. You've had a thing every night this week.Copy !req
70. Uh... I have plans.Copy !req
71. Football at Hector's house,
and I know how you hate football.Copy !req
72. I don't hate football. I get why it's fun.Copy !req
73. It just kind of propagates
the ideology of physical dominanceCopy !req
74. and the economic subjugation
of the working poor,Copy !req
75. plus the concussions.Copy !req
76. It should be illegal. LOL.Copy !req
77. Um... what are you doing Friday?Copy !req
78. Shoot. Friday, I got a thing.
Just another guy thing.Copy !req
79. But, Josh, that's the thing.
I love guy stuff.Copy !req
80. I'm, like, such a guy.Copy !req
81. When I was a kid, people thought
I was a guy all the time.Copy !req
82. It turned out I had a hormone imbalance.Copy !req
83. It was a very... It was a very hard time
but-but, yeah, I'm down to do whatever.Copy !req
84. What are you doing Friday, broseph?Copy !req
85. Just going to a new place
called The Paddle.Copy !req
86. It's a ping pong cocktaileria.
It's pretty fun.Copy !req
87. Wait. Hold on a second.
Did you say "ping pong"?Copy !req
88. Josh... shut up, shut up,
shut your stupid face.Copy !req
89. - What—?
- No, Josh, shut up!Copy !req
90. Shut up right now!Copy !req
91. You know that I was
a teenage ping pong champion.Copy !req
92. I was the Junior Miss
Table Tennis ChampionCopy !req
93. for the Eastern Northern Seaboard
County District.Copy !req
94. Seriously?Copy !req
95. The Junior Miss Table Tennis ChampionCopy !req
96. for the Eastern Northern Seaboard
County District?Copy !req
97. - How did I not know that already?
- I don't know.Copy !req
98. Maybe we should hang out more.
Maybe we should live together.Copy !req
99. That's good.Copy !req
100. Oh...Copy !req
101. - Oh, man.
- Yeah, it's true.Copy !req
102. This is great.Copy !req
103. I mean, you should come by
and give us a few pointers then.Copy !req
104. Oh! I couldn't.
I'm so rusty, but okay.Copy !req
105. Cool!Copy !req
106. Yeah.Copy !req
107. Blam!Copy !req
108. Hello, men.Copy !req
109. - What's with her?
- I don't know, but I'll find out.Copy !req
110. I'm her best friend.Copy !req
111. - Everyone knows that, right?
- Everyone knows you say it.Copy !req
112. Same thing, right?Copy !req
113. - Hey, babe. What's up?
- Nothing. Never mind.Copy !req
114. If I told you, it would, you know,
violate the no-shenanigans clauseCopy !req
115. of our friend contract.Copy !req
116. - Oh.
- But, basically, I have to learn how to beCopy !req
117. a competition-level
ping pong player in a day.Copy !req
118. Oh, okay. Anyways, listen.Copy !req
119. You're not!
- I am.Copy !req
120. I am applying to law school!Copy !req
121. - Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!Copy !req
122. - Law school! Esquire!
- Esquire! Law school!Copy !req
123. - Esquire!
- Esquire!Copy !req
124. - Paula! Paula!
- Esquire! Paula!Copy !req
125. What word do you want to chant?
Just let me know.Copy !req
126. I can't choose. They're all awesome.Copy !req
127. Okay, listen, it doesn't matter.
I need a letter of recommendation.Copy !req
128. Rebecca Nora Bunch,
would you do me the honor—Copy !req
129. Yes, yes, yes, a thousand times yes.Copy !req
130. Thank you. Thank you so much.Copy !req
131. Okay. I need that by Friday, okay?Copy !req
132. - I'll get it done today.
- Oh, God, Rebecca.Copy !req
133. Things are finally starting
to happen for me.Copy !req
134. You know? I can't believe it.
My dreams might actually come true.Copy !req
135. You so deserve it.Copy !req
136. Okay.Copy !req
137. But this time, maybe, just maybe...Copy !req
138. I came back.Copy !req
139. Paula Proctor, how may I help you?Copy !req
140. No, don't even worry about it.
It's my pleasure.Copy !req
141. Yeah. Okay. No, thank you.Copy !req
142. Rebecca told me
you're applying to law school,Copy !req
143. - Eeeh!
- And so...Copy !req
144. I took the liberty of writing you
a recommendation.Copy !req
145. Oh. Well, um... here's the thing.
Rebecca's actually doing it for meCopy !req
146. 'cause, I mean, we're besties, so...Copy !req
147. Oh, my. Yeah, yeah, of course, of course.Copy !req
148. I understand. I mean, you and I
are best friends and she's your bestie,Copy !req
149. whatever that is.Copy !req
150. But you know what?
If you need a second recommendation,Copy !req
151. consider it done.Copy !req
152. No. Here's the thing. I don't, so...
Um, but, like, thank you.Copy !req
153. Well, that's cool. That's cool.Copy !req
154. I'll just hang onto this,
and, you know, maybe do another draft,Copy !req
155. another polish, as they say.Copy !req
156. - Okay. Yeah.
- Yeah.Copy !req
157. Yeah, everything can always
use a little improvement,Copy !req
158. just like a friendship.Copy !req
159. Can I help you?Copy !req
160. Hi, I'm Xiao Huang,Copy !req
161. 2016 San Gabriel Valley Junior
Table Tennis Champion.Copy !req
162. - Do you know where I can find—?
- Ooh, ooh!Copy !req
163. That's mine, that's mine. He's with me,
he's with me. Hi, I'm Rebecca.Copy !req
164. Hi.Copy !req
165. Do you need coffee
before we get started? Espresso?Copy !req
166. I just think if it's really meant to be,Copy !req
167. you don't need to manufacture
some fake enthusiasm for Josh's hobby.Copy !req
168. Isn't a relationship
all about meeting in the middle?Copy !req
169. Okay, Dr. Ruth,
I'm paying you for ping pong,Copy !req
170. not the hokey pokey
about the hanky-panky.Copy !req
171. That's funny. Should I tweet that?
Let's just get back to ping pong.Copy !req
172. How do I hold the paddle?
Do I hold it like this or like this?Copy !req
173. You hold it like this.Copy !req
174. Wait, I look dumb.
I need to look hot. Can you do that?Copy !req
175. - Sexy ping pong? Copy that.
- Cool.Copy !req
176. There he is. Mr. Leaving Las Vegas
but with an inspirational ending.Copy !req
177. - Kev, don't.
- I get it.Copy !req
178. You want to downplay your courage
and I understand.Copy !req
179. I'm just so proud of you, man.
You inspired me to quit kettle chips.Copy !req
180. - That's my gateway drug.
- It's not a drug. It's a potato.Copy !req
181. Also, you no longer have
to serve alcoholic beverages,Copy !req
182. and I've taken beer battered shrimp
off the menu.Copy !req
183. - Oh, God.
- Hey, Greg.Copy !req
184. Heard you finally figured out
you're an alcoholic.Copy !req
185. - I'm happy for you.
- Thanks?Copy !req
186. Yeah, I had an ex-boyfriend
who went to rehab for his Oxy addiction.Copy !req
187. A lot of ups and downs.
May he rest in peace.Copy !req
188. - He died?
- No, but I hope he does.Copy !req
189. He stole a lot of 20s out of my purse.
Anyway, I'm pulling for you, buddy.Copy !req
190. - We all are.
- Guys, I appreciate your support,Copy !req
191. but can we just do our jobs
and not talk about this so much?Copy !req
192. I understand.
We should keep things normal.Copy !req
193. - That's what we should do.
- Yeah.Copy !req
194. Listen up, gang! Be normal!Copy !req
195. Greg does not want to be treated
differently for his alcohol addiction,Copy !req
196. so be cool!Copy !req
197. Be cool.Copy !req
198. Emergency meeting called by Serrano.
What do you think it's about?Copy !req
199. Did you tell him about you and Rebecca?Copy !req
200. - You said you were gonna.
- I haven't seen him! No one has!Copy !req
201. He hasn't been around.Copy !req
202. - I will tell him at some point.
- Gentlemen.Copy !req
203. - What do you think Serrano wants?
- I don't know.Copy !req
204. Maybe we should ask him
since he's right there.Copy !req
205. He's waving us over. 'Sup, man?Copy !req
206. - Ghosted on us. Where you been?
- What's this meeting about?Copy !req
207. Okay, guys, give him a break.
He's trying to tell us.Copy !req
208. Greg, whatever this is,
it concerns all of us, right?Copy !req
209. You asked us all to come hereCopy !req
210. because, I mean, you're not putting
any one individual on blast, right?Copy !req
211. Dude, what?Copy !req
212. Shh! Let him talk.
Greg, you have the floor.Copy !req
213. Sit down, guys.Copy !req
214. Here's the thing.Copy !req
215. I'm sorry I've been MIA
and that I lied to you.Copy !req
216. My mom didn't have botched
plastic surgery.Copy !req
217. She did get her nose done recently
and it looks amazing.Copy !req
218. But the truth is, I have been dealing
with some things.Copy !req
219. Like?Copy !req
220. Like I got a DUI, spent a night in jail,
turns out I'm an alcoholic,Copy !req
221. I've been going to meetings,
and I'm trying to stay sober.Copy !req
222. That's it. Bingo, bango, done. Beers?Copy !req
223. Wow. Whoa.Copy !req
224. Dude, this is heavy.Copy !req
225. I know. It's a shock, right?Copy !req
226. Eh...Copy !req
227. Or not a shock.Copy !req
228. Yeah, no, not really.
Sort of saw that coming.Copy !req
229. I am shocked and upset.Copy !req
230. Greg, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.Copy !req
231. I feel terrible.Copy !req
232. If I did anything to contribute
to this in any way—Copy !req
233. What?Copy !req
234. I was the one with the fake ID
in high school.Copy !req
235. At every party, I would dare you
to drink the whole bottleCopy !req
236. because I thought it was funny
or something.Copy !req
237. God, I don't know if I can live
with myself anymore.Copy !req
238. Weirdly, this isn't about you.Copy !req
239. It's okay. Don't give Josh a hard time.Copy !req
240. My sponsor, Guardrail—
That's his biker name. It's a long story.Copy !req
241. He has a friend named Throttle.
It's a very colorful group of people,Copy !req
242. and I'm not supposed to say names,
but I think nicknames are okay.Copy !req
243. Just don't tell any of your biker friends,
just cover our bases.Copy !req
244. But anyway, Guardrail said,Copy !req
245. some people in my life would
take it harder than others.Copy !req
246. It's all right, Josh.Copy !req
247. No one caused this.
It's me and I'm working on it.Copy !req
248. Well, I'm proud of you. Cheers, Greg.Copy !req
249. Don't cheers an alcoholic, dumb-ass.Copy !req
250. - It's a light beer, idiot-ass.
- White Josh is right.Copy !req
251. I don't think we should
be drinking around you.Copy !req
252. No, it's okay.Copy !req
253. You don't have the problem, I do.
You guys can drink. I can't.Copy !req
254. Let me show you what I mean.Copy !req
255. - Come on.Copy !req
256. Wow, I did not know it was that bad.Copy !req
257. Everybody!Copy !req
258. That wasn't a woman?Copy !req
259. That's where that scar comes from.Copy !req
260. I didn't do anything wrong. Yes!Copy !req
261. Again, not about you.Copy !req
262. Dear God, thank you for this boba.Copy !req
263. Bless the hands that have rolled
these tapioca balls.Copy !req
264. Is that how boba is made? I'm not sure.Copy !req
265. Don't you only say grace before a meal?Copy !req
266. Boba is a drink that you eat.Copy !req
267. Okay. Dude, listen, I'm in a rough place.Copy !req
268. Greg is an alcoholic.Copy !req
269. I can't tell him about me and Rebecca.Copy !req
270. He's in such a fragile state.
I don't think he could handle it.Copy !req
271. Okay. So—Copy !req
272. Now, I know what you're gonna say.
"Be honest," blah, blah, blah.Copy !req
273. You know, "Jesus likes honesty,"
blah, blah, blah.Copy !req
274. But Jesus didn't have sex
with his friend's ex.Copy !req
275. Not that I know of, anyway.
Maybe he did. I don't know.Copy !req
276. Josh, stop.Copy !req
277. I think your impulse to not tell Greg
is wise and mature.Copy !req
278. What? No. Thank you. Really?Copy !req
279. Telling Greg would be selfish.Copy !req
280. It would only alleviate your own guilt,
blah, blah, blah,Copy !req
281. which I guess is how I sound to you?Copy !req
282. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
283. Josh, you're right.Copy !req
284. Greg has a lot on his plate right now.
Don't add to it.Copy !req
285. Wow. I'm right about this?Copy !req
286. Great, because I really
didn't want to tell him.Copy !req
287. Well, you are gonna have a chance
to practice not telling him right now.Copy !req
288. So...Copy !req
289. There's this thing in recovery
where you own up to your mistakes,Copy !req
290. and I'm just starting to do that now,
and I know I need to start with you.Copy !req
291. Oh, Greg, you do not have to do this.Copy !req
292. Please, just let me get this out.Copy !req
293. I am so sorry about the French fries.Copy !req
294. What?Copy !req
295. You know that time
when we went outCopy !req
296. after seeing
your friend's terrible band...Copy !req
297. and you ordered French fries and I ate
all of them because I was wasted?Copy !req
298. When I think of myself doing that, I am...Copy !req
299. That was so selfish of me and I'm sorry.Copy !req
300. Wow, I'm really glad
you reached out about that.Copy !req
301. - You are?
- No.Copy !req
302. I don't remember that at all,
but I will take your French fry apologyCopy !req
303. and apply it to other stuff.Copy !req
304. Okay. That works.Copy !req
305. - Did he see me? He saw me?
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.Copy !req
306. Okay, I'm gonna walk right up to him,
say a quick hello, and boom, I'm cool.Copy !req
307. Yeah, dude,
this is gonna go great for you.Copy !req
308. Yeah.Copy !req
309. Oh, hey! Nice to see you guys.
How are you?Copy !req
310. Hey, man,
we didn't get to talk much earlier.Copy !req
311. I heard about you and Valencia.
That's rough. Where are you staying?Copy !req
312. Where— Where am I staying?Copy !req
313. Where do I reside?Copy !req
314. Where do you hang your hat?Copy !req
315. Um... Um...Copy !req
316. I have an Airbnb in Claremont.Copy !req
317. It belongs to a celebrity.Copy !req
318. He uses it as his weekend house.Copy !req
319. What celebrity weekends in Claremont?Copy !req
320. Oh, I'm not supposed to tell anyone.Copy !req
321. It's Josh Hutcherson,
but you didn't hear that from me.Copy !req
322. He goes there when he wants
to feel down to earth, yeah.Copy !req
323. Look, Josh, I know you're weirded out
by the whole alcoholic thing.Copy !req
324. I know it's coming
from a place of friendship.Copy !req
325. - Yeah.
- Thank you.Copy !req
326. I think it's kind of nice.Copy !req
327. I slept with Rebecca!Copy !req
328. - Oh... There it is.
- I'm sorry, what?Copy !req
329. It was the night of the wedding
and I'm so sorry.Copy !req
330. - You're really good at secrets, Josh.
- You slept with Rebecca that night.Copy !req
331. That makes sense.Copy !req
332. I was being a drunk jerk
and abandoned her by blacking out.Copy !req
333. I can't blame you guys.
I have to take responsibility.Copy !req
334. Okay, wait. Before you forgive me,Copy !req
335. you should know it wasn't
just the one time.Copy !req
336. It's been...Copy !req
337. - More than once.
- Yeah.Copy !req
338. It's been a lot of times,
and I'm sort of staying with her,Copy !req
339. and there is no celebrity
Airbnb in Claremont.Copy !req
340. I don't know famous people. I wish I did.Copy !req
341. - Stop talking.
- I sold a karaoke machineCopy !req
342. to Michael Madsen at Aloha once.Copy !req
343. It's okay, Josh. It's cool.Copy !req
344. I don't need to know
any more information. We're cool.Copy !req
345. Oh, God.Copy !req
346. I feel so much better.Copy !req
347. Let's just put this behind us, okay?Copy !req
348. - Are you sure?
- Yes.Copy !req
349. Okay. Bye.Copy !req
350. Yeah. What a mess.Copy !req
351. Yeah, good job.Copy !req
352. I'm sorry. Did you just bro-hug the guy
that's sleeping with your ex-girlfriend?Copy !req
353. Yeah.Copy !req
354. Okay, but you're, like,
upset about it, right?Copy !req
355. You really liked Rebecca.
You dicked me over for her.Copy !req
356. It's, like, kind of important to me
that you be upset about this, Greg.Copy !req
357. Listen, what Rebecca and I had togetherCopy !req
358. was an undefined thing
followed by a nightmare wedding date,Copy !req
359. and then I didn't call her for a month.Copy !req
360. Dude, you're getting sober.
You're not turning into a robot.Copy !req
361. - It's okay to have feelings.
- It's fine. I'm okay.Copy !req
362. I'm, uh... I'm doing amazing.Copy !req
363. - Mm-hmm.
- I'm bringing donuts to my next meeting.Copy !req
364. I know that doesn't sound
like a big deal, but it is. Oh, it is.Copy !req
365. So I, um...
I actually have to go to work now.Copy !req
366. - I'm working a double.
- Yeah.Copy !req
367. - Take care, Heather.
- But...Copy !req
368. Hey.Copy !req
369. What are you doing?Copy !req
370. I'm just stretching
for my private ping pong lessonCopy !req
371. in the conference room
with an 11-year-old child.Copy !req
372. Of course, 'cause
that makes perfect sense.Copy !req
373. Okay. Hey, listen, I just came in
to remind you that today is Friday.Copy !req
374. Oh! Thank God, Friday, TGIF.Copy !req
375. Oh! Full House, Family Matters...
Step by Step.Copy !req
376. Okay, no, you were supposed to give me
that letter of recommendation by today?Copy !req
377. Oh...Copy !req
378. Right. Oh, oh, oh,
the letter, the letter, the letter.Copy !req
379. Okay. Can I get it to you tonight
at literally, like, 2:00 a.m.?Copy !req
380. Can you submit it at 2:00 a.m.?Copy !req
381. Yes. Yup.Copy !req
382. Yeah. That's no problem at all.Copy !req
383. I mean, or, you know,
I could just use Darryl's letter, I guess.Copy !req
384. No. Oh, come on,
don't use Darryl's letter.Copy !req
385. I love the guy, but he can't even spell
the word "separate."Copy !req
386. - No, I'll do it, I'll do it.
- Okay. I don't know.Copy !req
387. I'm just kinda getting the feeling that
maybe you don't want to write the letter?Copy !req
388. Oh, my God, no, you're hurting my heart.
Of course, I want to write it.Copy !req
389. Ugh! But Xiao just got here,
and I don't want to be rude,Copy !req
390. because he's an 11-year-old child,
but, Paula, I will write it, okay?Copy !req
391. I promise. I always keep my promises.Copy !req
392. A Lannister always pays her debts.Copy !req
393. I just started on season one,
so no spoilers.Copy !req
394. Okay.Copy !req
395. - Darryl, what were you doing?
- Ned Stark dies, by the way.Copy !req
396. But he's the show.Copy !req
397. - Don't get too used to Robb, either.
No.Copy !req
398. You know what?
You're getting a lot better at this.Copy !req
399. And do I— do I look hot?Copy !req
400. Uh...Copy !req
401. - Yeah?
- Thank you, young man.Copy !req
402. This is so great, 'cause when Josh sees
that I'm good at ping pong,Copy !req
403. he's gonna know
that I'm cool and independent,Copy !req
404. and he's gonna be really impressed.Copy !req
405. And I know exactly
what he's gonna say to himself.Copy !req
406. Uh, one, two, three.Copy !req
407. One, two, three.Copy !req
408. One, two, three. One, two, three.Copy !req
409. Why are all of my friends
in love with this girl?Copy !req
410. So, she's still working
on the recommendation?Copy !req
411. Uh, yeah, but it's okay.
She's gonna get it to me tonight.Copy !req
412. She's got a lot of work to do. Okay?Copy !req
413. She's got a lot going on in her life.
She's busy.Copy !req
414. I shouldn't have asked her
for such a big favor.Copy !req
415. What? I don't think it's such a big favor.Copy !req
416. I mean, after everything
you've done for her—Copy !req
417. That she didn't ask for.Copy !req
418. She did ask you to throw a rock
through a window.Copy !req
419. Okay, okay.Copy !req
420. Look, she's...
she's young, she's confused.Copy !req
421. Wow. You are really making excuses
for her, more than you would for our kids.Copy !req
422. That's 'cause she's better
than our kids, Scott.Copy !req
423. Okay? She didn't pull a knife
on Aunt June, for starters.Copy !req
424. Paula, she owes you.Copy !req
425. Oh. Oh-ho-ho. No, no, no. Uh-uh.
She does not owe me, okay?Copy !req
426. She is my friend and she is busy.Copy !req
427. And, you know, I don't know.Copy !req
428. Maybe she thinks this whole
law school thing is dumb, okay?Copy !req
429. And maybe it is. I'm old.Copy !req
430. Maybe— Maybe it's too late.
Maybe this whole thing is dumb.Copy !req
431. It's not dumb.Copy !req
432. Your dreams are not dumb.Copy !req
433. And I know Rebecca doesn't think that.
She's a very smart girl.Copy !req
434. Hey, suck my paddle, losers!Copy !req
435. All right, let's Mama have some. Okay.
No, no, Daddy's gonna take that one. Okay.Copy !req
436. All right. All right.
Goldilocks wants some porridge. Okay.Copy !req
437. Oh. Okay. You got it, all right.Copy !req
438. Okay. Yup.Copy !req
439. I thought you said she was a champion.Copy !req
440. She did say she was rusty.Copy !req
441. Okay, attaboy. Attaboy, Xiao.
Yeah, yeah. I'm with him, I'm with him.Copy !req
442. - Dude, where's Greg?
- Yeah. He should be here by now.Copy !req
443. He's probably on his way.
I'll get him a beer.Copy !req
444. - Dude.
- What?Copy !req
445. - I don't know the rules.
- There is one rule.Copy !req
446. You guys told Greg to come here?Copy !req
447. Tonight? Why would you do that?Copy !req
448. Why do you care?Copy !req
449. Oh, my God. You told him?Copy !req
450. - You told me to tell him.
- Tell him what?Copy !req
451. Josh and Rebecca are having sex
and basically living together.Copy !req
452. - What?
- We're not living together.Copy !req
453. I'm just crashing at her apartment.Copy !req
454. - Okay, you tell yourself that.
- Wait, wait, wait, hold up.Copy !req
455. So, Greg knows
that you and Rebecca are together?Copy !req
456. Oh, no, Greg is probably freaking out.
Is that why he's not here?Copy !req
457. He said he was gonna come here right
after his meeting. He should be here.Copy !req
458. Yeah, where is he?Copy !req
459. Your boy never showed with the donuts.Copy !req
460. Shut up, Hubcap.Copy !req
461. You never put the new guy on donuts.Copy !req
462. Yeah, I know.
I thought he could handle it.Copy !req
463. Quick question.
Let me just clear something up.Copy !req
464. You told Hector
about you and Rebecca, and not me?Copy !req
465. - Why?
- Uh, you're a little judgy.Copy !req
466. You're a lot judgy.
You're like Judge Reinhold.Copy !req
467. He's not a judge.Copy !req
468. Guys, I'm really starting to worry.
He said he'd be here.Copy !req
469. - Drunk or not, Greg is prompt.
- So, what do you guys think?Copy !req
470. I'm a little rusty from my Eastern
Northern Seaboard County District days.Copy !req
471. But it's coming back to me.
It's like riding a bicycle.Copy !req
472. - What's wrong?
- Greg is supposed to be here. He's late.Copy !req
473. And the guys are worried
he's drinking again because...Copy !req
474. well, he's an alcoholic.Copy !req
475. I know. I'm not supposed to tell people,
but this is an emergency.Copy !req
476. Okay. What makes you think
he's drinking again?Copy !req
477. Because I told him the truth
about you and me.Copy !req
478. You did what?Copy !req
479. Josh, you told Greg about us?Copy !req
480. Remember, you and I decided
it was wrong to have sexCopy !req
481. - because Greg didn't know about us.
- Uh-huh.Copy !req
482. So, when I found out
about the alcoholic thing,Copy !req
483. I decided I was definitely
not gonna tell Greg.Copy !req
484. - Yeah.
- And then, I told Greg.Copy !req
485. Oh...Copy !req
486. Okay, um...Copy !req
487. How did he take it?Copy !req
488. I guess not great
'cause he's disappeared.Copy !req
489. Yeah. Good job, you horny monsters!Copy !req
490. Oh, I'm sorry. That sound judgy? Good.Copy !req
491. - Just not now, Chiphunk.
- Chiphunk?Copy !req
492. She thinks you look
like a giant buff chipmunk.Copy !req
493. I'll take it.Copy !req
494. Okay, maybe we're overreacting.
Maybe Greg's fine.Copy !req
495. Yes. Yeah, yeah.
He said he was fine, like, ten times.Copy !req
496. Guys, you know that when Greg says
he's fine, that's when he's not fine.Copy !req
497. - You know that.
- Maybe they're right.Copy !req
498. Maybe Greg is fine.
He'll just have a few and sleep it off.Copy !req
499. - One rule!
- Oh! That's the rule. Okay.Copy !req
500. Yeah, we should definitely
find him right now.Copy !req
501. Home Base is closed,Copy !req
502. so if he's out there getting messed up
and drinking again, he won't be there.Copy !req
503. I could try the beer garden
on East Cameron.Copy !req
504. - I'll try the gastropub on East Cameron.
- Should we carpool?Copy !req
505. Smart.Copy !req
506. Okay, okay. And where should I go?Copy !req
507. - And where should I go?
- No. Not you two. Stay away.Copy !req
508. Well, I can stay here in case he shows up.Copy !req
509. - That's smart.
- Thanks.Copy !req
510. I was a boy scout for years.Copy !req
511. I gotta go find him. I can't stay here.Copy !req
512. Well, how are you gonna do that?Copy !req
513. Paula, thank you so much
for helping me find Greg.Copy !req
514. And voila.Copy !req
515. Wow!Copy !req
516. Intuition.Copy !req
517. What are you doing here?Copy !req
518. Everyone's looking for you.Copy !req
519. Not me. I wasn't looking for you.
I just like ducks.Copy !req
520. Look, I know you know about me and Josh.Copy !req
521. I'm sorry you found out the way you did.Copy !req
522. Um...Copy !req
523. I wanted to tell you myself...
but I didn't know where you were.Copy !req
524. I got a single text from you,
and then you disappeared for a month.Copy !req
525. Yeah.Copy !req
526. I was embarrassed.Copy !req
527. I'm sure you heard.Copy !req
528. DUI, alcoholic, blah, blah, blah.Copy !req
529. I heard, yeah. I'm... I'm sorry.Copy !req
530. I really have been doing a lot better.Copy !req
531. But then, I heard about you and Chan.Copy !req
532. And...Copy !req
533. - And you had a drink?
- No, no, I didn't. I wanted to.Copy !req
534. I thought about it. I almost did.Copy !req
535. I picked out a drink
and a glass and ice.Copy !req
536. And instead...Copy !req
537. I hit a wall.Copy !req
538. Literally. Punched the hell out of a wall.Copy !req
539. - Oh, my God. Oh, ouch.
- Yeah. No, no, I'm okay.Copy !req
540. It's actually good.Copy !req
541. At least, I didn't use alcohol
to block an emotion.Copy !req
542. Look...Copy !req
543. At...Copy !req
544. The night of the wedding,
you completely broke my heart,Copy !req
545. but that's no excuse for me
to be sleeping with your best friend.Copy !req
546. And I'm so sorry.Copy !req
547. I don't need an apology from you.Copy !req
548. Rebecca, when I first met you,Copy !req
549. I said, "You're ignoring me,
so you're obviously my type."Copy !req
550. I picked you because
you weren't interested in me.Copy !req
551. That's funny
'cause, by the end of the wedding,Copy !req
552. you weren't interested in me.Copy !req
553. The funny thing is...
and not ha-ha funny, sad funny...Copy !req
554. The reason I got a DUI...Copy !req
555. was because I was driving over
the next morningCopy !req
556. to tell you that I loved you.Copy !req
557. But I blew my shot.Copy !req
558. And that's my fault.Copy !req
559. Life went on without me, and...Copy !req
560. you and Josh...Copy !req
561. you should be happy together.Copy !req
562. You're happy, right?
And he treats you well?Copy !req
563. Um...Copy !req
564. Yes.Copy !req
565. Then everything worked out fine.Copy !req
566. Wow, you're like...
you're like this new enlightened person.Copy !req
567. Not really. Not yet. Someday, I hope.Copy !req
568. Hey, Rebecca?
Sorry, I need a ride back to Torrance.Copy !req
569. Yeah, hold on a second.Copy !req
570. - Greg, this is Xiao.
- Hi.Copy !req
571. We are wearing matching outfits because—Copy !req
572. Oh, no, no, I don't—
I don't need to know. It's okay.Copy !req
573. - Hi.
- Hi.Copy !req
574. Here's the letter you asked for,Copy !req
575. I should've written it
the second you asked for it,Copy !req
576. so please forgive me
and my garbage self.Copy !req
577. Oh, Rebecca...Copy !req
578. You know that I thought for a secondCopy !req
579. maybe you thought that me going
to law school was ridiculous.Copy !req
580. What? No, no, no. No.Copy !req
581. I'm so sorry that you thought that
for even a second.Copy !req
582. Paula, you are so brave.Copy !req
583. I had a conversation
with someone recently.Copy !req
584. It was Greg. It was last night.
It was at a duck pond.Copy !req
585. And it made me realize
that changing your life is hardCopy !req
586. and you deserve support.Copy !req
587. I want to be there for you.Copy !req
588. Don't read it in front of me.
I'll get embarrassed.Copy !req
589. Oh, my God, this is so sweet.Copy !req
590. Oh!Copy !req
591. - Oh, the part—
- It's true. It's all true.Copy !req
592. You're the greatest person I've ever met.Copy !req
593. Cookie. Oh...Copy !req
594. This is a beautiful letter
and I will... I will treasure it forever.Copy !req
595. But I had to turn in Darryl's letter
because he gave it to me on time.Copy !req
596. - Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.
- You know what? Don't be.Copy !req
597. His letter was not terrible.Copy !req
598. Best friends for life.Copy !req
599. What the hell are these?Copy !req
600. These are the most expensive
donuts in the city.Copy !req
601. Gourmet donuts from the new place
on East Cameron.Copy !req
602. We like our usual place.Copy !req
603. And you got one dinosaur-shaped donut?
What are we supposed to do with that?Copy !req
604. - Fight over it?
- I was trying to make it up to you.Copy !req
605. Next time, just get
what you're supposed to get.Copy !req
606. Better yet, just show up.Copy !req
607. I think I can do that. I hope I can.Copy !req
608. Now, let's split this adorable dinosaur
before people see it.Copy !req
609. - You get the butt.
- Yeah.Copy !req
610. So he wasn't getting drunk?Copy !req
611. He was just sitting there on a bench
with a box of donuts?Copy !req
612. Yeah, he was fine.Copy !req
613. He was great, actually.Copy !req
614. He's, like— He's learning
to process things differently.Copy !req
615. He actually seemed like
he was in a great place.Copy !req
616. Oh. Phew.Copy !req
617. Man, I am so relieved. That is so good.Copy !req
618. So, uh... hey, it all kind of worked out.Copy !req
619. Totally. Hey, you said you love
video games. You want to get in here?Copy !req
620. Um, I'm not feeling
the video games right now.Copy !req
621. Actually, I lied to you.
I don't— I don't like video games.Copy !req
622. Just like you lied about ping pong?
What was that about?Copy !req
623. I was trying to spend time with you, Josh.Copy !req
624. That's what the whole stupid
ping pong thing was about.Copy !req
625. You know what, Josh?
You live here. You do.Copy !req
626. And you can tell yourself whatever,Copy !req
627. but I deserve to be with someone
who treats me well.Copy !req
628. Okay.Copy !req
629. Wow.Copy !req
630. Yeah. Phew. Wow. Okay.Copy !req
631. Yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
632. Hi, ma'am. Ma'am, excuse me.
You're on the ball.Copy !req
633. Just— No, it's right—
Okay, so just move your foot this way.Copy !req
634. This shouldn't be this hard.
This is funny.Copy !req
635. Okay. No, your skirt
is just so voluminous.Copy !req
636. It's like you're in the 18th century.Copy !req
637. I don't even know where the ball is
anymore. Oh, okay, you kicked it.Copy !req
638. Also, you're not wearing any underwear.
Have a great day. Okay.Copy !req
639. Hi. Sir? Sir?Copy !req
640. So... Oh, there's her underwear.Copy !req