Community 3x10

Directed by Tristram Shapeero

Travis Richey as Inspector Spacetime (voice) • Derwin Jordan as Reggie • Taran Killam as Cory Radison • Rebecca Ann Johnson as Glee Club Girl • Kim Gatewood as Glee Club Girl #2

When the Greendale Glee Club is unexpectedly sidelined, the school's effervescent choir director Cory Radison sets about recruiting the study group members to fill in. Skeptical at first, they eventually fall under his hypnotic spell, singing and dancing their way to the annual Christmas Pageant.

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!req Community 3x10 [02:32]
!req Community 3x10 [Community 3x10]
Syntax: !req EPISODE [quote or timestamp] (max. 8 square brackets)

For quotes, now you can request by index (e.g !req Community 3x10 [10-11]; !req Community 3x10 [20] [24]). Keep in mind, though, that index numbers might change at any time.
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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. Wow. They found a way to make the human being even creepier.

2. Covering him in icicles.

3. I think it's festive.

4. Yeah, my favorite Christmas tradition

5. is trimming the hellraiser.

6. Guys, I found something we can watch together

7. for Christmas this year.

8. The long-lost 1981 Inspector Spacetime Holiday Special.

9. Run time two and half hours and so critically reviled

10. that after it aired, the creator has his knighthood revoked.

11. That sounds terrible.

12. I want to watch it twice,

13. but I'm spending Christmas with my relatives.

14. Or rather, I'm spending the day with my relatives

15. while they refuse to acknowledge Christmas.

16. You Jehovah's Witnesses— so severe.

17. Andre and I will be spending Christmas giving gifts

18. to the more persuadable of our Jewish friends.

19. I wouldn't call an unannounced visit from your pastor "a gift."

20. And don't bother this year.

21. I'll be at the movies with my bubbe.

22. You're not taking both of them?

23. Well, one's dead.

24. - What? - I was looking forward

25. to hanging out with you guys this Christmas.

26. This semester has been so long and dark and angry.

27. I was thinking we could have

28. some light-hearted fun as a family.

29. I think what we've learned, Abed,

30. is that attempts to make the holidays brighter

31. tend to give them a certain darkness.

32. Oh, I don't know if I agree with that.

33. Actually, maybe I do.

34. Heads up. Glee club.

35. Merry Christmas, Greendale.

36. Glee club here, reminding you

37. that our Christmas pageant is coming.

38. Next stop, regionals!

39. What the hell are "regionals?"

40. They never stop talking about it.

41. Please tell me we were not this obnoxious

42. the year we filled in for them.

43. T-minus five seconds till hip-hop remix.

44. Four, three.

45. Come on! Re-re-re-remix!

46. Re-re-re-remix!

47. You're awfully quiet, Jeff.

48. Nobody hates glee club more than you.

49. Today I'm just content to sit back and enjoy the show.

50. And now our pop music mash-up!

51. Elton Lil' John Lennon!

52. Kick it!

53. Hey, tiny dancer!

54. Okay!

55. Stop!

56. Cease and desist.

57. Glee club, meet ASCAP,

58. protecting musical copyrights since 1914.

59. It appears they have received an anonymous tip

60. that unlicensed material was being performed here

61. without the artists' permission.

62. Merry Christmas, everyone.

63. Glee club just became history club.

64. My soul is dead!

65. Oh!

66. Okay, if anyone asks, we were never here.

67. Why?

68. The glee club is at Westside Hospital,

69. recuperating from a collective nervous breakdown.

70. This is the second glee club we've lost in two years.

71. We might have to cancel the Christmas pageant.

72. And to think they were this close to regionals.

73. What the hell are regionals?

74. They're this close, Pierce.

75. Anyway, an old friend wants to talk to you.

76. Your favorite glee club instructor,

77. the dreamy and boyish Mr. Cory Radison!

78. Oh!

79. Uh, I thought I told you to call me Mr. Rad.

80. Or Cory.

81. Just don't call me "late to dinner."

82. Unless you're serving brussels sprouts!

83. I won't, I promise!

84. This guy's like human froyo.

85. Look, when the last glee club died in that bus crash,

86. you guys stepped up.

87. And you were the best gosh darn emergency substitutes

88. I've ever worked with.

89. - Aw! - Well, this time...

90. I'm not gonna kid you. I won't be easy.

91. - Oh! - Your best...

92. Won't be good enough.

93. And ten times your best will be so bad,

94. I will yell at you.

95. But I promise, if we dig down—

96. - Pass. - Yeah.

97. Okay.

98. Whew.

99. Don't you hurt him.

100. Mr. Rad!

101. I feel like we let Mr. Rad down.

102. No, he let himself down when he left the house

103. this morning wearing a sweater-vest.

104. I guess we did have fun last time.

105. Did we? I can hardly remember.

106. It's all a weird, happy, musical fog.

107. Yeah, it was almost like being on ecstasy,

108. only instead of having pointless conversations

109. and dancing like idiots— wait.

110. It was exactly like being on ecstasy!

111. That's what worries me about this guy.

112. He is equal parts hanson and manson.

113. Nobody let him corner you until he is out of recruitment mode,

114. or next thing you know,

115. we'll all be caring about Christmas pageants and...

116. Regionals.

117. - You're right, deal. - Ugh.

118. - Agreed. - Got you.

119. What the hell are regionals?

120. What are you still doing here?

121. I thought I'd give her one more tinkle

122. before I took down decorations.

123. No glee club means no pageant, means no Christmas.

124. I'm sure trying to make things brighter

125. just would've made more darkness.

126. That sounds like a certain ex-lawyer talking.

127. I see a lot of myself in you, Abed.

128. You care about your friends, and you wish they cared

129. more about each other.

130. That's not an easy position to be in sometimes.

131. I just want my friends and I

132. to have a merry Christmas together.

133. Well, maybe you could start

134. by giving them the greatest Christmas gift of all.

135. What's that?

136. Glee!

137. Glee!

138. Thank you, Mr. Rad.

139. Don't break down the set yet.

140. I'm gonna try to get my friends to be in the Christmas pageant.

141. Thank you, Abed!

142. Thank you.

143. Merry Christmas, Troy.

144. Abed, you look gleeful.

145. Troy, don't you think it might actually be fun,

146. doing this Christmas pageant for the glee club?

147. Abed, we hate the glee club.

148. Yeah.

149. I guess I just like liking things.

150. Abed.

151. Look, you know I'd do anything you did, but...

152. I'm a Jehovah's Witness.

153. We're not supposed to celebrate Christmas.

154. I've been thinking about that.

155. I may have a loophole.

156. What if you were a Jehovah's Witness

157. that was merely pretending to be into Christmas,

158. gathering clues and blending in

159. to take down the holidays from within?

160. You mean like a spy investigating,

161. making it seem like I'm celebrating,

162. when actually I'm infiltrating Santa's operation?

163. Hey, guys.

164. Rapping?

165. - Yep, wanna join us? - Totally!

166. Wait, you guys never let me rap with you.

167. Well, we're gonna need all hands on deck

168. if we're gonna go to regionals.

169. Cool.

170. I just need to... Study...

171. Though... In my room.

172. So have fun!

173. And then, this morning,

174. I could hear them in the bathroom,

175. doing country Western mash-ups.

176. And they won't stop talking about regionals!

177. Maybe it's nothing.

178. Yeah, if "nothing" wears a sweater-vest

179. and seems aggressively asexual.

180. Come on, let's all study for our biology final

181. in our old—

182. Where's our table?

183. Who's that guy?

184. You guys all see him too, right?

185. - Hey, guys. - Merry Christmas, y'all.

186. Sorry about the rearrangement.

187. We need this space to rehearse for the pageant.

188. But we're not doing the pageant.

189. Look, guys, I hear your negativity,

190. but also, can I counter with this?

191. Who hates glee?

192. Listen to how that sounds.

193. Glee literally means "glee."

194. Oh, stop it!

195. Not liking glee club doesn't make us bullies,

196. and implying that is reverse bullying.

197. Good point. Sing about it?

198. No!

199. I understand them, but you, Pierce?

200. Your generation invented music!

201. I don't know about "invented."

202. Perfected, maybe. Pierce!

203. They're just trying to pander to your demographics'

204. well-documented historical vanity. Resist!

205. Abed, wasn't Santa Claus himself

206. part of Pierce's peer group?

207. I believe so.

208. One, two, three, four.

209. - Pierce is on board. - That's great!

210. For the Christmas queen, I'm hoping

211. we can get Shirley or Annie.

212. They both have really strong voices

213. - There's also Britta. - Britta's adorable!

214. So Shirley or Annie for the Christmas queen.

215. There's a leaf on Britta's head.

216. She's playing a tree!

217. And it's gonna be so fun!

218. Mr. Radison, who authorized you to rearrange our study room,

219. and who do you think you are anyway?

220. I'll tell you.

221. I'm scared to go into the study room.

222. There are so many top hats in there.

223. I wish there was a way we could stop all this.

224. I mean, I realize the stakes aren't actually that high,

225. but somehow, that just makes it extra scary.

226. I know.

227. Jeff, I think I know what Mr. Rad is up to.

228. There's something you have to see.

229. Mr. Rad plans to get every single member

230. of our study group to join the glee club.

231. Well, I don't know how he thinks that's gonna happen.

232. I'll show you.

233. Wha—?

234. This is just one of the many costume changes

235. I'll be doing during the show.

236. We're a shoo-in for regionals, right?

237. Annie, you too?

238. This is beneath you.

239. You are an intelligent woman.

240. Also, you're Jewish!

241. I guess I have a lot to learn

242. about holiday tradition.

243. Is this a bit?

244. I can't see!

245. - Annie. - Ooh!

246. Look, eventually, you hit a point of diminishing returns

247. on the sexiness.

248. What's a dimin—?

249. - Stay back, old man. - Don't even hum.

250. Shirley, Britta, I have no intention of singing.

251. Good.

252. I can't speak for these little angels though.

253. Oh!

254. Mm!

255. Shirley, you need to get out of here!

256. They're not gonna tell you.

257. That's what they do. That's what they do.

258. Oh, gotta tell the babies!

259. Oh, Jeff, thank God!

260. They got Shirley! It's just you and me now.

261. Jeff?

262. Guys, I am swelling with pride!

263. You stepped up, and you saved the Christmas pageant!

264. Whoo!

265. And it's all thanks to you, Mr. Rad.

266. I just hope we can repay you by making regionals.

267. Uh, I thought this was regionals.

268. Don't let my confusion undercut their importance.

269. Places, everyone!

270. Scooch, scooch, scooch, scooch, scooch.

271. I could not have done this

272. without your recruiting skills, Abed.

273. I was happy to do it. For a while there, I thought

274. we were gonna end the semester on a really dark note.

275. I'm glad we're singing and dancing together instead.

276. This has been a good time.

277. And it's going to continue to be a good time.

278. If we win regionals, then it's straight on to sectionals.

279. And then a week later is semis. Then semiregionals.

280. Then regional-semis.

281. Then national lower-zone semis!

282. Oh.

283. But I kinda thought this was...

284. You know, just for Christmas.

285. No, no, no.

286. This is forever.

287. This is what we do now.

288. This is who we are.

289. Is this about regionals?

290. I just talked to Cory, and he needs you to be

291. the mouse king instead of me.

292. Me? But I'm supposed to be a mute tree.

293. - It's an emergency. - Hmm?

294. This will help us get to regionals!

295. I knew it! Wait, what are the lyrics?

296. - They're in your heart, Britta. - Right. Duh doy!

297. What the—?

298. Oh, Britta's in this?

299. No, stop, stop, stop, stop!

300. What are you doing? Get off the stage!

301. I'm singing my heart's song.

302. Get off the stage, and never sing again!

303. You are the worst!

304. Hey!

305. You do not get to call Britta "the worst."

306. - Yeah! - Let her finish!

307. Mr. Radison, I think it's fine.

308. I know Greendale is an all-inclusive school.

309. Why don't we let Britta sing her awkward song?

310. Yeah!

311. No, no, no, no, no, no!

312. This show is supposed to be gleeful and bright and fun,

313. and you can let me do that,

314. or there can be another bus crash!

315. Well, figuratively.

316. I'm not saying,

317. "I killed the last glee club."

318. I'm saying you not listening to me

319. is like metaphorically cutting the brake lines on your own—

320. look, kings of Leon!

321. What did he say?

322. Did Mr. Rad kill the last glee club?

323. And to think I trusted him enough

324. to captain a magic carpet in that dream I had last night.

325. Maybe Jeff's right.

326. Maybe forcing things to be bright just makes

327. the darkness underneath even darker.

328. This was all my fault, insisting we do the pageant.

329. Sorry.

330. Merry Christmas.

331. I guess I'll just see you guys after the holidays.

332. Happy time day, Reggie.

333. It is tradition to give one's constable a gift

334. at the end of each orbital cycle.

335. Oh, thank you, inspector!

336. - Blimey! A hologram? - Mm-hmm.

337. Let's activate it and view the performance.

338. This is terrible.

339. We decided we wanted to spend the holiday together.

340. It's been a dark semester.

341. I basically killed a guy.

342. And I kind of attacked you guys with a fire axe.

343. Yeah.

344. I'm thinking about seeing a new shrink.

345. - What? - Don't.

346. Holy crap.

347. Look how terrible this Christmas special is.