1. Dean! Dean!
Copy !req
2. Don't shoot,
red-haired guy.
Copy !req
3. Why not?
Copy !req
4. Something's not right
about the game.
Copy !req
5. We just took out a guy
who turned out to be
Copy !req
6. a professional
paintball assassin.
Copy !req
7. A professional?
Aah!
Copy !req
8. That doesn't make sense.
Copy !req
9. Why would someone
who gets paid to do things
Copy !req
10. be at Greendale?
Copy !req
11. No, no! I'm not playing!
I'm not playing!
Copy !req
12. No, I'm the dean!
Stop shooting me!
Copy !req
13. Hi, Pistol Patty.
Copy !req
14. Did they take you hostage?
Copy !req
15. Dean Spreck?
Copy !req
16. Hello, Craig.
Copy !req
17. City College.
Copy !req
18. Now I understand everything.
Copy !req
19. Now your whole evil plan
is clear as day.
Copy !req
20. But if you need to explain it
to your men, I understand.
Copy !req
21. It's simple, Craig.
Copy !req
22. I posed as a fake
ice cream company,
Copy !req
23. sponsored your
end-of-the-year picnic,
Copy !req
24. and waved enough money
under your students' noses
Copy !req
25. to provoke them
to destroy their own campus.
Copy !req
26. Who hurt you, Steven?
Copy !req
27. How could any dean be so mean?
Copy !req
28. Oh, you haven't seen
Copy !req
29. how mean this dean
can be... en.
Copy !req
30. There's one!
Copy !req
31. After him!
Copy !req
32. Wait, did you say "bean"?
Copy !req
33. Guys. Guys.
Copy !req
34. City College is trying
to destroy Greendale,
Copy !req
35. and they're an unstoppable juggle knob.
Copy !req
36. - Juggernaut.
- Juggernaut.
Copy !req
37. Which means if
we're gonna fight them,
Copy !req
38. we have to form a school-wide
alliance of rebels.
Copy !req
39. In other words, it seems
we've left the Western motif
Copy !req
40. and are entering a more
of a Star Wars scenario.
Copy !req
41. to form a faceless regime,
Copy !req
42. how are we any better than them?
Copy !req
43. You're the worst.
Copy !req
44. Okay, she is just
saying that to fit in.
Copy !req
45. The floor recognizes Magnitude.
Copy !req
46. First off, pop, pop!
Copy !req
47. And second,
Magnitude's a one-man party.
Copy !req
48. A one-man party
can't be in an alliance.
Copy !req
49. That's a paradox.
Copy !req
50. - I agree to disagree.
- Easy, paradox.
Copy !req
51. We're all on the same side.
Copy !req
52. But hasn't the other side
already won?
Copy !req
53. Their goal was to make us
trash the school.
Copy !req
54. We trashed it.
Copy !req
55. Yeah, but we still
might have a chance
Copy !req
56. to hit 'em where it hurts.
Copy !req
57. - Their balls?
- No.
Copy !req
58. - Just below their balls?
- Their wallet, Leonard.
Copy !req
59. - I think it's called a taint.
- Oh.
Copy !req
60. Why do you think
they sent in a ringer to win?
Copy !req
61. It must be because we're entitled
Copy !req
62. to the prize they promised.
Copy !req
63. 100 Gs.
Copy !req
64. Ooh, I could use that money.
Copy !req
65. This is why
we have to agree right now
Copy !req
66. that whoever wins,
we give the money to Greendale.
Copy !req
67. To repair the damage
and save our school.
Copy !req
68. Abed, tell him.
Copy !req
69. Whatever, pal. I ain't in it
for your revolution.
Copy !req
70. I'm in it for me.
Copy !req
71. Wait, Abed, this was your idea.
Copy !req
72. I know, but I'm calling dibs
on the Han Solo role
Copy !req
73. before Jeff
slouches into it by default.
Copy !req
74. Star-Burns,
I need that vest.
Copy !req
75. Oh, yeah, right.
Copy !req
76. Give me the vest, Laser Breath.
Copy !req
77. Before our conversation gets nasty.
Copy !req
78. Question.
How long is the game gonna last?
Copy !req
79. 'Cause Andre's
home with the baby...
Copy !req
80. Damn it, Shirley.
Forget your newborn child
Copy !req
81. and think about
the people that need you.
Copy !req
82. I can't afford to lose
a single soldier.
Copy !req
83. - What?
- Oh, now you're the leader?
Copy !req
84. I don't see you stepping up.
Copy !req
85. I don't step up
to being leader, Troy.
Copy !req
86. I reluctantly accept it
when it's thrust upon me.
Copy !req
87. Oh, Jeff.
Copy !req
88. Oh, my God.
What is that?
Copy !req
89. Magnitude!
Copy !req
90. Pop...
Copy !req
91. P...
Copy !req
92. Pop what?
Pop what?
Copy !req
93. What is he trying to say?
Pop what, Magnitude?
Copy !req
94. Can you hear me?
Who is this?
Copy !req
95. Oh, that's Jeff Winger.
Copy !req
96. You are in trouble now.
Copy !req
97. Jeffrey, it's your friend the dean.
I'm safe!
Copy !req
98. I can hear you,
Mr. Winger.
Copy !req
99. This is City College's
dean Spreck.
Copy !req
100. Hey, Spreck, you cheat.
Copy !req
101. You can't spray people
with paint by remote.
Copy !req
102. And you can't have
City College students
Copy !req
103. in a Greendale game.
Copy !req
104. All my men have been registered
Copy !req
105. at Greendale for weeks.
Copy !req
106. As for rules,
they're clearly defined
Copy !req
107. in your school's agreement
Copy !req
108. with my fake ice cream company.
Copy !req
109. If you get paint on you,
you're out.
Copy !req
110. Well, I'm glad to see
there's paperwork involved,
Copy !req
111. because we are going to win,
and you are gonna pay.
Copy !req
112. Yay! Go,
Jeff Winger study group!
Copy !req
113. Those guys are ballers, yo.
Copy !req
114. I hope you like getting balled.
Copy !req
115. Sir, this guy tried to charge us
Copy !req
116. three paint balls
to use the bathroom.
Copy !req
117. We were gonna shoot him,
Copy !req
118. but tell him what you told us.
Copy !req
119. Don't shoot me.
Copy !req
120. Great.
Now shoot him.
Copy !req
121. Sure, shoot me.
Copy !req
122. You'd certainly be doing
Jeff Winger a big favor.
Copy !req
123. Greendale human beings,
Copy !req
124. it is now clear
that we have no choice
Copy !req
125. but to team up
and defeat City College.
Copy !req
126. I also have no choice
Copy !req
127. but to accept the role
thrust upon me.
Copy !req
128. And what role would that be?
Copy !req
129. No time to squabble, Troy.
Copy !req
130. "For Greendale" on three.
Copy !req
131. One, two...
Copy !req
132. Jeff, every second counts.
Copy !req
133. "For Greendale" on two.
One...
Copy !req
134. Guys.
Copy !req
135. - For Greendale!
- For Greendale!
Copy !req
136. Greendale students...
Copy !req
137. I understand you've unified,
Copy !req
138. and intend to draw this game out.
Copy !req
139. Well, if it's a war you want,
Copy !req
140. it's a war you will lose.
Copy !req
141. City College is stronger, faster.
Copy !req
142. Our sperm counts are higher.
Even in our women.
Copy !req
143. Resistance is as pointless
as your degrees.
Copy !req
144. Honestly, ask yourself,
Copy !req
145. what does "liberal arts"
even mean?
Copy !req
146. Look, "Welcome to Greendale.
Copy !req
147. You're already accepted."
Copy !req
148. Losers.
Copy !req
149. What the hell?
Copy !req
150. - Welcome to Greendale.
- You're already dead.
Copy !req
151. Jackpot.
Copy !req
152. Shirley, you keep watch
while we get these.
Copy !req
153. Here.
Help me with this.
Copy !req
154. Sure thing, your worship.
Copy !req
155. Abed!
Copy !req
156. Stop trying to be Han Solo.
Copy !req
157. It's making me
embarrassed for you.
Copy !req
158. Come on.
Admit it. You like it.
Copy !req
159. I like having conversations
with adults.
Copy !req
160. Playing Star Wars
is worn out and immature.
Copy !req
161. You like me because I'm immature.
Copy !req
162. There's not enough
immaturity in your life.
Copy !req
163. I hope I don't
get shot waiting out here.
Copy !req
164. I'd hate to go home to my babies.
Copy !req
165. So reconnaissance indicates
Copy !req
166. the key to City College's
strategy is
Copy !req
167. the gatling gun inside
the ice cream truck,
Copy !req
168. which we will charge on masse,
Copy !req
169. overwhelming their defenses,
Copy !req
170. and taking that gun
for ourselves.
Copy !req
171. Well, that's not how
I would proceed.
Copy !req
172. Troy, do you happen
to have a better plan?
Copy !req
173. I do happen, Jeff.
I happen very much.
Copy !req
174. We'll use sneak attacks
Copy !req
175. to draw their patrol
to the library,
Copy !req
176. where one of us
will pull the fire alarm,
Copy !req
177. activating the sprinklers,
Copy !req
178. which I will have rigged
using my super plumbing skills
Copy !req
179. to shower everything
in the building with paint.
Copy !req
180. Paint in sprinklers?
Copy !req
181. - Are we the little rascals?
- I was.
Copy !req
182. Have you heard your plan?
Copy !req
183. You want to charge a machine gun.
Copy !req
184. I've got something to say.
Copy !req
185. I don't take orders from girls.
Copy !req
186. Because they don't talk to me.
Copy !req
187. Watch it, Quasar face.
Copy !req
188. Annie's a good kid
and a better shot.
Copy !req
189. So listen up,
or you'll be floating home.
Copy !req
190. Thank you, Abed.
Sorry.
Copy !req
191. Han.
Copy !req
192. Okay, I think we should
split the troops in half
Copy !req
193. and carry out both plans
simultaneously.
Copy !req
194. Troy, your plan will lure people
off the ice cream truck,
Copy !req
195. allowing Jeff's troops
to take the stronghold.
Copy !req
196. You're welcome.
Copy !req
197. I'm so glad
that we didn't shoot you.
Copy !req
198. Now we have
the tactical advantage
Copy !req
199. of knowing that Jeff Winger
wants to be a ballerina,
Copy !req
200. and that his Achilles heel
is... wieners.
Copy !req
201. That's just
the tip of the iceberg.
Copy !req
202. For one more pudding,
Copy !req
203. I'll tell you why
he's jealous of me.
Copy !req
204. And you say that they kicked
you out of their study group
Copy !req
205. - after two years?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
206. What took them so long?
Copy !req
207. Hey, thanks for sticking up
for me back there.
Copy !req
208. This group gets so tangled
in each other's feelings,
Copy !req
209. you're kind of a hero
for standing outside of it.
Copy !req
210. Yeah, well, heroes are great,
Copy !req
211. but I'll take a blaster
every time.
Copy !req
212. Anyway,
just wanted to let you know.
Copy !req
213. I don't think you're immature.
Copy !req
214. I think you're great.
Copy !req
215. For a no-good,
Copy !req
216. laser-faced,
jabba scoundrel.
Copy !req
217. You're good, kid.
Copy !req
218. Don't get cocky.
Copy !req
219. Hey!
Copy !req
220. They're right on our tail.
Copy !req
221. Operation "Troy's Awesome Plan"
Copy !req
222. is living up to its name.
Copy !req
223. Yeah, good for you.
Copy !req
224. Looks like they're
taking Troy's bait.
Copy !req
225. Squad "B" commencing
operation "Actual Operation."
Copy !req
226. Everyone look alive.
Leonard, good enough.
Copy !req
227. Greendale, it's been a pleasure
fighting with you.
Copy !req
228. Some of us won't make it.
Copy !req
229. But there is a place where we
will all see each other again,
Copy !req
230. - and that place is Denny's.
- Which Denny's?
Copy !req
231. We'll figure it out
later, Leonard.
Copy !req
232. The one near the 15 exit?
I'm banned from there.
Copy !req
233. Well, then I guess
I'll see you in hell.
Copy !req
234. Then let's kick some taint.
Copy !req
235. Okay. On my count.
Copy !req
236. One.
Copy !req
237. Two!
Copy !req
238. Vicki!
Copy !req
239. Alright.
Copy !req
240. Go go go!
Copy !req
241. Lock the door.
Copy !req
242. All right. Shirley, you have
the most important job, okay?
Copy !req
243. Yeah, yeah, pull the fire alarm.
Copy !req
244. Can we move this along?
I'm missing CSI.
Copy !req
245. Enemy soldiers are incoming.
Copy !req
246. I need everyone to evacuate
through the air vent.
Copy !req
247. Garrett!
Copy !req
248. I may be stuck in this vent.
Copy !req
249. It is too early to tell.
Copy !req
250. I think our only choice
is to try and shoot our way out.
Copy !req
251. Right. Commence operation
"Troy's Awesome Leadership
Copy !req
252. Is Never in Doubt".
Copy !req
253. That gun's too powerful.
Copy !req
254. I'm scared.
Copy !req
255. Quendra with a Q-U,
Copy !req
256. they can kill most of us,
Copy !req
257. but as long as nobody gives up,
Copy !req
258. somebody will make it through.
Do you understand?
Copy !req
259. Yes.
Copy !req
260. Charge!
Copy !req
261. Well, I'm out. We lost.
Copy !req
262. See you at Denny's?
Copy !req
263. Denny's is for winners.
Copy !req
264. Leonard, we're losing.
Copy !req
265. Britta, I've been in
a few real wars,
Copy !req
266. but this one is actually
the most terrifying.
Copy !req
267. Guys, we're dying out here.
Copy !req
268. Well, we're dying too!
Copy !req
269. They've trapped us in a dead end.
Copy !req
270. Hey, kid.
Copy !req
271. Someone's got to make it
out of here alive.
Copy !req
272. I had a dream
it would end this way.
Copy !req
273. Shirley, nobody's making it
out of the library.
Copy !req
274. Pull the alarm.
Copy !req
275. Britta, are you alive?
Britta? Britta?
Copy !req
276. Oh, hell.
Copy !req
277. Someone's got to win this.
Copy !req
278. I'm out.
Copy !req
279. Me too.
Copy !req
280. Looks like this is it.
Copy !req
281. Will you still be Han Solo
after we die?
Copy !req
282. 'Fraid not, doll.
Copy !req
283. Once I'm gone, I'm gone.
Copy !req
284. Oh. Okay.
Copy !req
285. Oh, got to do everything myself.
Copy !req
286. We're all dead.
All of us.
Copy !req
287. Paint raining from the sky.
Copy !req
288. Everyone in the library is dead.
Copy !req
289. Damn it.
Copy !req
290. Kill him.
Copy !req
291. Yes, sir.
Copy !req
292. It's my h-heart.
Copy !req
293. Hey, buddy, you okay?
Copy !req
294. Cool.
Copy !req
295. Eat paint, you storm-troopin',
Copy !req
296. City College knob gobblers.
Copy !req
297. Oh!
Copy !req
298. You're it, kid.
Copy !req
299. Shirley.
Copy !req
300. What are we supposed to do?
Copy !req
301. How 'bout we save
this school's ass?
Copy !req
302. Deal.
Copy !req
303. Go, go, go, go, go, go.
Copy !req
304. - That's it.
- Is that it?
Copy !req
305. - I think that's it.
- That's it?
Copy !req
306. - We win!
- We win!
Copy !req
307. Oh, we win!
Copy !req
308. Jeffrey!
Copy !req
309. We win! We win! Yes!
Copy !req
310. All right! We did it!
Copy !req
311. Who are you?
Copy !req
312. Your mother's lover.
Copy !req
313. - What?
- What?
Copy !req
314. I win!
Copy !req
315. You owe me 100 Gs.
Copy !req
316. And you can make the check out...
Copy !req
317. to Greendale.
Copy !req
318. Human beings!
Human beings!
Copy !req
319. Human beings! Human beings!
Copy !req
320. Human beings!
Human beings!
Copy !req
321. - Okay.
- There it is.
Copy !req
322. Final meeting of the semester
now in session.
Copy !req
323. Final order of business...
Copy !req
324. Pick a class we can all
take in the fall.
Copy !req
325. We could just take Anthro 201.
Copy !req
326. Too risky. Sequels are almost
always disappointing.
Copy !req
327. Since when are you in favor
of playing it safe, Han?
Copy !req
328. Cool down, Annie.
Copy !req
329. I was only Han Solo
because the context demanded it.
Copy !req
330. But here...
Copy !req
331. Oh. Star-Burns.
Copy !req
332. Yeah, he uses some kind
of crystal instead of deodorant.
Copy !req
333. Guys, I know exactly
what we should do.
Copy !req
334. We should see what Troy
thinks we should do.
Copy !req
335. Had some good ideas today.
Copy !req
336. Thanks, man.
Copy !req
337. Okay. I've given this
a lot of thought,
Copy !req
338. and I've decided
we should sleep on it.
Copy !req
339. Just came back
for my day planner.
Copy !req
340. Pretend I'm not even here.
Copy !req
341. You guys are great at that.
Copy !req
342. Come on, Pierce. We all know
this is no "day planner".
Copy !req
343. Here it is.
Copy !req
344. Now, if you'll excuse me,
Copy !req
345. it appears I'm running late
to drink a bottle of wine
Copy !req
346. in my bathing suit.
Copy !req
347. Pierce, wait.
Copy !req
348. You know, I've been coming
to this school for 12 years.
Copy !req
349. I've never been friends
with anyone here
Copy !req
350. more than a semester.
Copy !req
351. Probably for the same reason
I've been married seven times.
Copy !req
352. I guess I assume eventually
I'll be rejected,
Copy !req
353. so I, you know,
test people, push them,
Copy !req
354. until they prove me right.
Copy !req
355. It's a sickness.
I admit it.
Copy !req
356. But this place
has always accepted me,
Copy !req
357. sickness and all.
Copy !req
358. This place accepted all of you.
Copy !req
359. Sickness and all.
Copy !req
360. It's worth thinking about.
Copy !req
361. Um, I think we have
thought about it, Pierce,
Copy !req
362. and you're right.
Copy !req
363. And we were just picking a class
Copy !req
364. we could all be in this fall.
Copy !req
365. And we'd love for you to join us.
Copy !req
366. No, thanks.
Copy !req
367. I'm done with you guys.
Copy !req
368. I like this school,
Copy !req
369. but I'm done
with whatever you call this.
Copy !req
370. Adios.
Copy !req
371. - He was my ride.
- I'm going after him.
Copy !req
372. No, he's just acting out.
Copy !req
373. I've seen this behavior before.
Copy !req
374. In cats.
Copy !req
375. - My... my cats.
- It's true.
Copy !req
376. And now he'll come
slinking back in five,
Copy !req
377. four, three, two...
Copy !req
378. And then
one of the storm troopers
Copy !req
379. shot the others,
and it was Pierce.
Copy !req
380. And we won.
We saved Greendale.
Copy !req
381. - Sounds like you guys had a lot of fun.
- Yep.
Copy !req
382. Honestly, I don't know how
we're gonna top it next year.
Copy !req
383. Oh, I got a pitch.
Why use guns?
Copy !req
384. Take a hose and spray
the whole school with paint.
Copy !req
385. - Every inch of it.
- Actually, we kind of did that.
Copy !req
386. Haven't you been to the library?
Copy !req
387. - I'm working my way there.
- Mm.
Copy !req
388. Oh, you can just
put that anywhere.
Copy !req
389. Doing anything fun
for the summer?
Copy !req
390. - No plans.
- Cool.
Copy !req
391. Cool, cool, cool.
Copy !req
392. Slippery.
Copy !req