1. I can't believe
this is our 20th and final
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2. anthropology diorama
of the year.
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3. I can't believe our assignment
is making a diorama
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4. of us making our 19th diorama.
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5. - Yes, right.
- It's weird
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6. Oh, come on.
My forehead is not this big.
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7. Uh, Troy, can you pass me
that paintbrush?
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8. My monkey!
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9. My monkey took that paintbrush
and then went into that vent.
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10. Oh, I miss him so much.
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11. - Someone's got to go after him.
- I got this.
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12. - Woah!
- What are you doing?
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13. Trust me. I know these vents
like the back of my Chang.
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14. Holy...
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15. Is that a new stereotype?
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16. Oh, my God.
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17. Did you find him?
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18. Is that a new stereotype?
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19. No, and no.
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20. But there's all kinds
of stuff in here.
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21. Guys, you won't believe this
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22. It's like a sentimental
treasure pile.
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23. Oh, that's my spoon.
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24. No!
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25. Oh, Hubba Bubba.
Cool.
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26. I thought they stopped
making this.
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27. Community 2x21 - Paradigms of Human Memory
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28. And that's all of it.
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29. That's good.
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30. That means you can put
your clothes back on.
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31. No.
I'm going back in.
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32. Why?
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33. Monkey took my spoon.
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34. It's like a reverse cow birth.
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35. Annie, look, all
of your purple pens are here.
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36. Do you remember
when you got so mad
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37. because you thought
someone was stealing them?
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38. There are so many memories
in this pile.
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39. Look.
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40. Whoa.
The deputy's badge
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41. from when we spent that day
in that old ghost town.
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42. Oh, yeah.
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43. - We have to find the saloon.
- Every building is a saloon.
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44. We got to go!
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45. Get the tarnation back here,
you city slicking sons of...
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46. That was, like, one of
the best days of the whole year,
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47. and I almost
totally forgot about it.
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48. We almost totally got shot.
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49. Yeah, but by a prospector
in red long underwear.
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50. - How cool was that?
- Yeah
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51. Glad you had fun.
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52. By the way, that dude
was hard-core racist,
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53. like 1800s Disney-style.
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54. We learned new ways
to hate ourselves.
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55. Glee Club trophy.
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56. You guys remember when we had
to fill in for Glee Club?
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57. Guys, that's not a fond memory.
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58. We won, like, 70 awards.
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59. Yeah, but the reason
we had to fill in for Glee Club,
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60. was because they...
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61. Died.
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62. Their bus crashed.
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63. I know, but I was remembering
around that part.
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64. Yeah, focus on the positives,
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65. like we got
that cool new bus driver.
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66. Nice try, Britta,
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67. but the truth is
it's been a dark year.
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68. Pierce got hooked
on painkillers.
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69. Shirley's having
an unplanned baby.
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70. And, apparently,
Chang is in the group now?
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71. It's true.
God hates us.
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72. Remember when Abed had a total
mental breakdown at Christmas?
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73. That was adorable and magical.
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74. He thought everything
was claymation.
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75. Yeah. But everything wasn't.
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76. And what do you see now, Abed?
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77. A candy cane forest.
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78. We're all running through
the candy cane forest.
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79. Oh, careful, Britta bot.
Don't trip on a gumdrop.
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80. Oh, no, I tripped...
On a gumdrop!
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81. Yay. Let's find Santa some more.
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82. Well, I think
this year was awesome...
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83. Full of good times
with great people.
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84. Come on, you guys.
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85. Stop focusing on
all the bad stuff and dig deep.
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86. Abed, you're a computer.
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87. Scan your mainframe
for some juicy memories.
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88. Jeff and Britta
are having secret sex.
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89. Exhibit A : The one thing
I do remember from Halloween.
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90. - Hi.
- Hi.
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91. You need some help in there?
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92. Yeah, well, I can't use
my hands in this costume, so...
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93. Well...
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94. Exhibit B : Something
I overheard during Christmas.
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95. Why would I want to be in
a school that hates Christmas?
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96. He's got a point.
Kidding.
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97. What are you doing later?
How about some holiday benefits?
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98. Hey, Ixnay
in front of Uncan-day.
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99. Hmm.
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100. And finally Exhibit C :
The curious circumstances
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101. following the exciting conclusion
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102. of our St. Patrick's Day
adventure.
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103. - Really?
- Yeah.
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104. - Woah.
- Abed! Uh...
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105. Uh, a-a-a leprechaun
took our clothes.
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106. And you can never
tell anyone, okay?
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107. Okay, so we hooked up
a few times,
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108. but there's
a much larger issue here.
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109. We are friends with a grown man
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110. that clearly believes
in leprechauns.
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111. Didn't we decide
at the beginning of the year
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112. that for the good of the group,
we wouldn't allow any intimacy
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113. between each other
or ourselves?
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114. Troy, we never said ourselves.
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115. - Okay, now I'm really mad.
- So am I.
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116. Now we know why
our year's been so horrible.
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117. It's not God that hates us.
It's Jeff and Britta.
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118. Oh, please.
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119. If we were ruining your year,
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120. why didn't you even know
about it?
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121. Maybe we were so distracted
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122. by all the other times you two
put yourselves before the group.
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123. What?
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124. When have we ever put ourselves
before the group?
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125. You want examples?
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126. I think they want
some examples, Pierce.
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127. Okay, let's give 'em
some examples.
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128. Troy, drop a beat.
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129. - Just give 'em some examples.
- Fine.
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130. Chipmunk.
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131. Mm, impressive,
Mr. Winger.
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132. Someone's going to Regionals.
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133. It's a special cape.
A cape for justice...
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134. What are you doing?
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135. There's rioting in Tunisia!
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136. The Cape is premiering.
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137. Humanity is premiering, you jags.
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138. We need to talk.
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139. These people
are giving out free iPhones!
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140. - What?
- No!
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141. This habitat was for humanity.
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142. Whoever did it, step forward.
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143. You five are in big trouble.
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144. Jeff and Britta,
you're free to go,
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145. because you didn't step forward
and are therefore innocent.
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146. You can't ignore the facts.
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147. You two are ruining this group.
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148. Look, just because
we're good-looking
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149. - doesn't make us villains.
- Yeah, are you sure you guys
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150. have the group's
best interests at heart?
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151. Feast your ear tongues
on these memory pops.
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152. Pierce, you've had three flu shots.
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153. That's for the day care center.
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154. I'll be a living God!
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155. I'm glad you're considering
the exciting opportunity
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156. of selling
Lady Miss Lady cosmetics.
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157. Please, uh,
open your starter kits.
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158. Okay, now that the seals
have been broken,
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159. you each owe me $50.
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160. I'm Jeff Winger.
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161. Does this hard-boiled egg
make me look fat?
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162. My name is Jeff Winger.
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163. I love working this BlackBerry,
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164. because it really
tones my thumbs.
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165. It was a particularly small egg.
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166. That's why I was asking.
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167. You can yell at me
all you want.
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168. I've seen enough movies to know
that popping the back of a raft,
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169. makes it go faster.
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170. That show's gonna last
three weeks!
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171. Six seasons and a movie!
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172. Pierce, you can't sneak up
on me like that.
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173. When I'm startled,
my training takes over.
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174. - Hello!
- Ki-yah!
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175. Oh!
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176. Those are just stories
about us being cute.
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177. You guys actually
go out of your way
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178. to endanger the fabric
of this group.
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179. Yeah, leave our fabric alone.
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180. You guys aren't seeing
the bigger picture.
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181. We compartmentalized our libidos
for the good of the group.
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182. Oh, you compartmentalized,
did you?
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183. Then what's been going on
with us all year?
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184. What are you talking about?
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185. I'm talking
about the Annie of it all...
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186. The long looks,
the stolen glances,
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187. the general atmosphere
of "would they, might they?"
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188. Annie, I think you're reading
into some things.
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189. Oh, really?
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190. Oh, give me a break.
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191. I mean, you could do the same
thing with Pierce and Abed.
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192. Yeah, but, Jeff,
let's be honest,
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193. there's more
between you and Annie
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194. than there is
between me and Pierce.
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195. - How dare you?
- Abed, it's called chemistry.
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196. I have it with everybody.
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197. Everybody?
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198. I haven't felt any
of that chemistry coming my way.
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199. I don't know if it's because
you're racist
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200. or because
I intimidate you sexually,
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201. but I know
it's one of those two.
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202. Dean-a-ling-a-ling.
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203. I was just heading to judge
our belated carnival,
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204. when I heard you guys
having a tiff.
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205. What's the rumpus?
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206. We were debating
how many times per year
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207. a man can drop in a study room
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208. in a dumb costume
with irrelevant news.
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209. Dean-yow!
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210. It's Feline AIDS Awareness Day, folks,
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211. so let's whip it in the keister.
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212. Guys, Greendale's music
department is flat "baroque",
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213. so we are having
a fund-raiser.
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214. What's dean got to do with it?
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215. Why, it's time to Tina "Turner"
the clocks ahead.
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216. Happy daylight savings!
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217. Deanie, vidi, vici!
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218. I came, I saw,
I conquered the idea
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219. of a free Caesar-salad bar
in the cafeteria.
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220. Frankly, my dear,
I don't give a dean.
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221. That's right, Greendale presents
"Gone with the Windows,"
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222. where we'll celebrate
our new energy-conscious windows
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223. with a cotillion.
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224. Whoop.
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225. Okay.
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226. Well, I guess
we don't see our patterns
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227. until they're all laid out
in front of us.
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228. Thank you
for being so nice about it.
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229. Oh, dean. Dean.
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230. Can we please stop fighting?
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231. We're starting
to hurt innocent perverts.
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232. I don't want to stop.
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233. We're airing out
all this dirty laundry.
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234. After that,
we'll stop fighting forever.
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235. Am I the only one
that remembers
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236. our horrible camping trip?
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237. - It's "suh-mores.", not "s'mores."
- No, you're saying it wrong
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238. I just found out about it.
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239. It's pronounced "s'mores."
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240. Yeah, it's a contraction
of "some mores."
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241. So contract it.
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242. Stop saying "suh-mores"
unless you "can not."
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243. Guys!
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244. We need to stop fighting.
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245. No, we don't.
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246. It's good that we're finally
getting all this out there.
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247. After this,
we'll stop fighting.
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248. That's what we said
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249. when we were painting
Shirley's nursery.
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250. I don't being racist
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251. Hey, when I'm being racist,
you'll know.
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252. Guys, let's not repeat
the events of Caesar salad day.
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253. Troy, your nose is bleeding.
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254. Abed, stop being meta.
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255. Why do you always have to take
whatever happens to us
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256. and shove it up its own ass?
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257. He's not being meta.
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258. He's just pointing out what
none of us want to acknowledge...
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259. It's all of us.
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260. This group is toxic.
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261. We fight about fighting
about fighting.
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262. - We're sick.
- I hate us!
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263. Well, what do we do now?
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264. Well, we could do
what we always do...
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265. Storm out in a huff and say
that the group is breaking up.
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266. Troy, pass me
that paintbrush, please.
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267. Does anybody have any iodine?
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268. How many vents are you
gonna crawl out of this year?
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269. That's it.
We're done.
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270. Yeah. We're done.
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271. See you all tomorrow.
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272. Uh, you guys, wait.
I want to say something.
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273. You don't have to save us
with a speech.
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274. We're not breaking up,
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275. so we don't need to get
back together.
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276. I know I don't have to,
but I want to.
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277. Look, we've known each other
for almost two years now.
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278. And, yeah, in that time,
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279. I've given a lot of speeches,
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280. but they all have
one thing in common.
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281. They're all different.
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282. These drug runners
aren't gonna execute Pierce
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283. because he's racist.
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284. It's a locomotive
that runs on us.
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285. And the only sharks
in that water,
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286. are the emotional ghosts
that I like to call fear.
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287. Anchovies. Fear.
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288. And the dangers
of ingesting mercury.
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289. Because the real bugs
aren't the ones in those beds.
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290. And there's no such thing
as a free Caesar salad.
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291. And even if there were...
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292. The Cape still might find
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293. a second life on cable.
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294. And I'll tell you why.
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295. El corazon del agua es verdad.
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296. That water is a lie!
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297. Harrison Ford
is irradiating our testicles
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298. with microwave
satellite transmissions!
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299. So maybe we are caught
in an endless cycle
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300. of screwups and hurt feelings,
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301. but I choose to believe
it's just the universe's way
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302. of molding us
into some kind of supergroup.
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303. Like the Traveling Wilburys.
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304. Yes, Troy, like
the Traveling Wilburys of pain...
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305. Prepared for any insane
adventure life throws our way.
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306. And I don't know about you,
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307. but I'm looking forward
to every one of them.
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308. Oh, Jeffrey.
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309. Oh, Jeff.
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310. Jeffrey, Jeffrey.
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311. Well, I guess
we can get through anything.
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312. So it's probably okay
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313. if you and Britta want to keep,
you know, hooking up.
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314. - I don't mind it so much.
- I'm cool with it.
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315. - God cares.
- Whatever.
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316. Have fun tonight.
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317. So...
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318. I guess we don't have to keep
sneaking around anymore.
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319. Yeah, I guess not.
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320. You want to stop doing this?
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321. - Yeah, yeah.
- Yeah.
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322. - It's not you, it's me.
- It's you.
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323. Hey, guys.
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324. Hey, guys. Ooh.
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325. Hey, you guys
remember the time when...
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326. Those guys don't care
who they hurt, do they?
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327. You know I still don't even know
if I'm in the group?
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328. Hey...
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329. You and I have had
some pretty good times, huh?
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330. What a year.
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331. Hey everybody.
Can I help you with anything?
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332. I care about you guys.
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333. Shut up, dean.
You dress in stupid outfits.
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334. Well, you have a right
to your opinion,
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335. so I'll just leave.
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336. You could have been nicer
to the dean just then, Jeff.
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337. So what?
I don't care.
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338. I just think there maybe
could be repercussions, yo.
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339. I don't care what you think.
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340. I don't care
about repercussions.
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341. And I don't care
about the dean.
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342. - Okay.
- Okay
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343. Meanwhile, at that same moment,
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344. a truck full of toxic waste
crashes and spills on the dean,
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345. transforming him
into Mega-dean!
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346. I don't care about anything.
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347. Wait. I care now!
Now I care!
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348. Too late.
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349. I owe you guys an apology.
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350. The dean runs our school.
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351. He's entitled
to a modicum of respect.
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352. You're always
so mean to him. Why?
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353. It's embarrassing to admit,
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354. but sometimes I felt jealous
of his interesting outfits.
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355. Jeffrey,
if I didn't know better,
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356. I'd say you had a crush on him.
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357. I'll never tell!
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