Comedy Central Presents 5x5

1. ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR...

2. ANNOUNCER>> FROM NEW YORK CITY,

3. LOUIS RAMEY!

4. LOUIS>> AH, AH.

5. WHOA!

6. GLAD TO BE HERE.

7. VERY GLAD TO BE HERE!

8. LAST WEEK I WAS IN MOBILE,

9. ALABAMA.

10. VERY GLAD TO BE HERE!

11. THERE ARE MUTANTS IN MOBILE.

12. THEY GOT SOCIAL MUTANTS.

13. THEY GOT

14. REDNECKS-WANNA-BE-YUPPIES

15. THAT COULDN'T QUITE MAKE THAT

16. CROSSOVER?

17. THEY'VE GOT BMW'S, AND PUT

18. MUD TIRES ON THEM, KNOW WHAT

19. I'M TALKING ABOUT?

20. PORCHES WITH RIFLE RACKS?

21. DEEP FRIED SUSHI...

22. JUST GLAD TO BE TALKING

23. TO A CROWD WITH TEETH TONIGHT—

24. THAT'S VERY IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW.

25. YEAH.

26. THE REASON I WAS THERE—

27. I WAS THE BEST MAN AT A FRIEND

28. OF MINE'S WEDDING.

29. THAT WAS PRETTY EXCITING.

30. OUT OF CURIOSITY HERE—

31. HOW MANY WOMEN HAVE BEEN

32. THE BRIDESMAID AT SOMEBODY'S

33. WEDDING—

34. CLAP... IF YOU'VE BEEN

35. A BRIDESMAID.

36. LET ME ASK YOU THIS.

37. WAS IT THE UGLIEST DRESS YOU

38. EVER WORE IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE?

39. YEAH, AND I DON'T KNOW WHERE

40. HE GOT THESE TUXEDOS.

41. HE LOOKED LIKE JAMES BOND

42. I LOOKED LIKE JAMES BROWN.

43. LITTLE VELVET COLLAR—

44. LITTLE SATIN STRIPE GOING DOWN

45. THE LEG AND I WALK INTO CHURCH

46. LOOKING LIKE A BACKUP SINGER

47. FROM SOME OLD MOTOWN GROUP.

48. HEY, HOW Y'ALL DOIN'?

49. WE THE WETLOCKS.

50. YEAH.

51. YOU TAKE THIS WOMAN?

52. YOU DO?

53. BEING THE BEST MAN, YOU'RE IN

54. CHARGE OF THE BACHELOR PARTY.

55. I THROW GOOD BACHELOR PARTIES—

56. GOOD BACHELOR PARTIES.

57. THE KIND THAT, YOU WAKE UP AT

58. FIVE O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING,

59. YOU'RE ONLY CONCERN IS TO MAKE

60. BAIL.

61. AND WE DRANK SAMBUCA ALL NIGHT.

62. I LOVE SAMBUCA.

63. DRANK LIKE A BOTTLE AND A HALF

64. OF THIS STUFF.

65. HAD WHAT IS KNOWN AS A SAMBUCA

66. DREAM.

67. IT LAST LIKE THREE HOURS IN

68. TECHNICOLOR AND THERE'S CREDITS

69. ROLLING AT THE END.

70. I REMEMBER THIS ONE SCENE WHERE

71. I'M IN A HOT TUB WITH

72. TYRA BANKS, JENNIFER LOPEZ—

73. AND YOU WERE THERE, SWEETIE,

74. YOU WERE THERE.

75. YEAH, HE WAS THERE, TOO,

76. BUT HE WAS RUNNING THE CAMERA.

77. AND, AH...

78. THINGS WERE GOING GREAT.

79. THIS WHOLE RABBIT PLAYING A

80. BASS DRUM, STARTED TALKING TO

81. THE CHIHUAHUA SPEAKING SPANISH.

82. MUST'VE BEEN SLEEPWALKING,

83. BECAUSE WHEN I WOKE UP, I WAS IN

84. A GREYHOUND STATION COMPLETELY

85. NAKED HANDCUFFED TO A GOAT.

86. IT WAS LEGAL, 'CAUSE THE GOAT

87. WAS WEARING A WEDDING DRESS,

88. YOU KNOW.

89. THE PICTURES CAME OUT NICE—

90. WE DIDN'T GET MANY PRESENTS,

91. BUT I THINK OUR KIDS MIGHT

92. COME OUT LOOKING PRETTY COOL.

93. SEE, CAUSE GOATS HAVE KIDS—

94. THESE ARE PUNS-

95. SEE, GOATS HAVE...

96. HEY, WELL YOU, TOO,

97. PEOPLE.

98. NOTHING'S GOING TO RUIN MY DAY—

99. I'M FEELING TOO GOOD...

100. I PLAYED SOME PRACTICAL JOKES—

101. LOVE PRACTICAL JOKES— LOVE 'EM.

102. LIKE YOU GO TO FAST FOOD

103. RESTAURANTS, AND ORDER STUFF

104. THEY DON'T HAVE.

105. GOTTA TRY THAT.

106. GO TO BURGER KING OR SOMETHING.

107. HEY, BURGER KING— I CAN HAVE IT

108. MY WAY, HUH?

109. WHEW!

110. LOOK AT THAT MENU—

111. AH! AH-AH.

112. HOLD ON SCREECH, BE RIGHT WITH

113. YOU— HOLD ON, BRO.

114. AH— LET ME HAVE THE UH, CATFISH

115. DINNER, WITH BRUSSELL SPROUTS,

116. TWO BISCUITS, AND A COORS LIGHT.

117. GUY BEHIND THE COUNTER'S

118. GOIN'...

119. FIFTEEN MINUTES OF FUN,

120. RIGHT THERE.

121. IT WAS FIVE MINUTES OF HIM

122. LOOKIN', FIVE MINUTES OF THE

123. MANAGER LOOKIN'.

124. FIVE MINUTES OF THE MANAGER ON

125. THE PHONE WITH THE HOME OFFICE.

126. YEP, WE'RE OUT OF BEER.

127. ANOTHER THING I LIKE TO DO—

128. I LIKE TO GO TO TANNING SALONS.

129. I LOVE THAT— LOVE GOING TO

130. TANNING SALONS.

131. YEAH.

132. I DON'T ACTUALLY GO INSIDE,

133. THOUGH, I STAND OUTSIDE,

134. RIGHT BY THE ENTRANCE GOING...

135. AAHHH!

136. SEE?

137. SOME GET IT— SOME DON'T.

138. SEE HOW THAT WORKS?

139. SO I'M FEELING PRETTY GOOD—

140. MY SISTER JUST HAD A BABY.

141. PRETTY EXCITED ABOUT THAT.

142. YEP.

143. I'M A NEW UNCLE NOW.

144. PRETTY EXCITED.

145. UH, I WAS THERE— I SAW THIS

146. BABY WHEN IT WAS NINE MINUTES

147. OLD.

148. NINE MINUTES OLD.

149. IF YOU'RE A GUY, AND YOU'VE

150. NEVER SEEN A NEWBORN CHILD,

151. LET ME TELL YOU NOW—

152. IT'S THE MIRACLE OF LIFE.

153. NOTHING MORE PRECIOUS,

154. NOTHING MORE DELICATE.

155. NOTHING QUITE AS UGLY AS A

156. NEWBORN CHILD.

157. THEY GOT NO HAIR—

158. THEY GOT NO TEETH—

159. THEY'RE LIKE ALIENS.

160. THAT'S NOT A BABY!

161. THAT'S A JUNKIE!

162. WHAT...

163. OF COURSE WITH MY SISTER HAVING

164. A BABY, YOU KNOW,

165. NOW THE ENTIRE FAMILY'S ALWAYS

166. WONDERING WHEN I'M GETTING

167. MARRIED.

168. I DATE— I'M JUST I'M NOT VERY

169. GOOD AT IT.

170. NO, I DON'T PICK UP ON THE

171. SUBTLE MESSAGES WOMEN GIVE OFF.

172. I USUALLY DON'T EVEN REALIZE

173. THE RELATIONSHIP'S OVER UNTIL

174. THAT RESTRAINING ORDER SHOWS UP

175. IN THE MAIL.

176. THEN I'M JUST THINKING SHE'S

177. PLAYING HARD TO GET.

178. YEAH!

179. I MEAN, WE STILL SEE EACH OTHER.

180. WELL, SHE DOESN'T SEE ME.

181. 'CAUSE I'M HIDIN' IN THE BUSHES.

182. BUT, UH...

183. LOUIS>> SO...

184. WE GOT A NEW PRESIDENT.

185. I CAN TELL YOU'RE HAPPY ABOUT

186. THAT.

187. A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T LIKE HIM—

188. GOTTA BE HONEST WITH YA.

189. I DON'T KNOW THAT MUCH ABOUT

190. BUSH...

191. OH— WAIT A MINUTE, ALL I KNOW

192. ABOUT MR. BUSH IS HIS FATHER.

193. HIS FATHER WAS AN EXCELLENT

194. PRESIDENT.

195. EXCELLENT PRESIDENT.

196. FOR COMEDY.

197. SOME OF THE BEST MATERIAL

198. CAME FROM THAT MAN.

199. REMEMBER WHEN HE GOT SICK ON

200. NATIONAL TELEVISION?

201. STARTED BLOWING CHUNKS ON

202. DIGNITARIES?

203. WHAT A PROUD DAY TO BE AN

204. AMERICAN.

205. WOULD HAVE LOVED TO HAVE BEEN

206. AT THAT PARTY.

207. ME STANDING THERE—

208. GEORGE IN THE CORNER...

209. OH.

210. PEOPLE ASKING ME IF I'M

211. AN AMERICAN?

212. I'M GOING— BUDDA MA GIGGA MOMO.

213. BUDD MA GIGGA MOMO.

214. TITO-MARLON-LATOYA!

215. SEE, THOSE ARE THE JACKSONS.

216. SEE?

217. TITO, MARLON?

218. WELL, MAYBE NOT LATOYA...

219. BUT UM...

220. HEY, SHE'S PSYCHIC, SHE SAW IT

221. COMING.

222. NOW, I DON'T KNOW WHY

223. POLITICIANS LIE.

224. I DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT.

225. TELL US, WE CAN HANDLE IT.

226. I'LL VOTE FOR THE FIRST PERSON

227. THAT JUST ADMITS TO EVERYTHING.

228. FIRST PERSON THEY WALK UP TO

229. AND GO, EXCUSE ME, DID YOU SLEEP

230. WITH THAT WOMAN?

231. YEAH, WHAT'S UP BABY?

232. HOW YOU DOIN', GIRL?

233. YEAH, I SLEPT WITH HER,

234. I'D SLEEP WITH HER AGAIN.

235. WHAT'S UP, BABY?

236. WHAT?

237. DID I EVER DO DRUGS?

238. YEAH.

239. I DID SOME DRUGS.

240. ONCE?

241. I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY TIMES

242. I DID DRUGS.

243. I KNOW I WAS DOING HER WHEN

244. I WAS DOING THE DRUGS.

245. I CAN TELL YOU THAT.

246. WHAT?

247. TAXES?

248. NO, NOT THAT YEAR—

249. I WASN'T EVEN WORKING— I WAS

250. JUST DOING HER AND DOING DRUGS.

251. WHAT?

252. DRAFT?

253. YEAH, I'LL HAVE ONE.

254. YOU WASN'T ONE, BABY?

255. I WAS TALKING ABOUT BUSH?

256. I DON'T KNOW BUSH THAT MUCH,

257. BUT I DO KNOW TEXAS—

258. BEEN TO TEXAS.

259. PEOPLE BEEN TO TEXAS?

260. ALL RIGHT, YOU ESCAPED!

261. TEXAS IS NOT A BAD PLACE.

262. IT'S JUST THAT THERE'S NO LITTLE

263. POLITICAL APOLOGY FOR ANYTHING.

264. THEY DON'T APOLOGIZE FOR

265. ANYTHING.

266. HEY, YOU GOT A LOT OF GUNS

267. AROUND HERE.

268. YEAH!

269. OKAY.

270. THAT'S NOT THE RESPONSE

271. I WAS LOOKING FOR.

272. I HEAR YOU EXECUTE A LOT OF

273. PEOPLE, TOO.

274. YEAH!

275. ALL RIGHT, I'M OUTTA HERE.

276. I WAS ACTUALLY THERE WHEN

277. CARLA FAY TUCKER WAS GOING TO BE

278. EXECUTED.

279. REMEMBER HER?

280. FIRST WOMAN EXECUTED SINCE

281. THE CIVIL WAR.

282. PEOPLE SIGNING PETITIONS.

283. YOU CAN'T DO IT.

284. THEN THE POPE CALLED...

285. POPE SAID YOU CAN'T DO IT.

286. SHE FOUND GOD.

287. YOU CAN'T DO IT.

288. AND THEY DID IT.

289. WELCOME TO TEXAS.

290. IT TAKES A LOT OF BALLS TO SAY

291. NO TO THE POPE, DOESN'T IT?

292. HEY, HEY, PADRE, HOW ARE YOU

293. DOING, MAN?

294. CARLA?

295. YEAH, SHE'S HERE.

296. BORN AGAIN?

297. HELL, WE'LL FRY HER TWICE.

298. THEY SHOULD ACTUALLY PUT A GUY

299. IN THE ELECTRIC CHAIR ON THE

300. SIGN WHEN YOU ENTER TEXAS.

301. WELCOME TO TEXAS.

302. LITTLE GUY IN THE CHAIR GOING—

303. DON'T UP.

304. AFTER THAT I WENT TO...

305. ASPEN, COLORADO...

306. BEAUTIFUL PLACE,

307. IF YOU EVER GET A CHANCE, GO.

308. OF COURSE, NOTHING REMINDS YOU

309. YOU'RE THE ONLY

310. BLACK GUY IN TOWN

311. LIKE FRESH SNOW.

312. PEOPLE COULD FIND ME

313. ON THE MAP—

314. YEAH, THERE HE IS, RIGHT THERE.

315. SPENT THE WHOLE WEEK SKIING,

316. WATCHING RICH PEOPLE HIT TREES.

317. HEY BOB, WOULD YOU LOOK—

318. WHAT HAPPENED, BRO?

319. I SAW A BLACK GUY SKIING!

320. NAW, YOU SAW BIGFOOT.

321. YEAH, DOING A LOT OF TRAVELING.

322. I WAS IN DETROIT.

323. I HAVE A HISTORY WITH DETROIT.

324. I HAD A RENTAL CAR STOLEN IN

325. DETROIT ABOUT TWO YEARS AGO.

326. AND THEN HAD MY CAR STOLEN

327. LAST YEAR.

328. YEAH.

329. THEY GOT THE BEST CAR THIEVES

330. IN THE WORLD IN DETROIT.

331. YEAH, I DIDN'T THINK THEY COULD

332. TAKE MINE, CAUSE THE WINDOWS

333. WERE ROLLED UP, THE DOORS WERE

334. LOCKED...

335. I WAS IN THE CAR AT THE TIME,

336. ACTUALLY.

337. I WAS AT A RED LIGHT.

338. THEY GOT A LOT OF OUT-OF-WORK

339. AUTO WORKERS THERE, CAUSE I'M

340. SITTING THERE, AND I HEAR THIS

341. LIKE...

342. I LOOK BACK AND THE BACK SEAT

343. WAS GONE.

344. I TURN BACK AROUND, AND I'M

345. HOLDING TWO STICKS AND SITTIN'

346. ON BLOCKS.

347. YEAH, I'M SITTING IN THE MIDDLE

348. OF THE STREET GOING—

349. YOU GUYS ARE GOOD!

350. MAN, I'D PAY TO SEE THAT AGAIN!

351. I'D PAY MONEY!

352. AH, DAMN, YOU GUYS WERE GOOD...

353. IT ONLY TOOK YOU...

354. DAMN!

355. I'VE BEEN PLAYING A LOT OF

356. MILITARY BASES, TOO.

357. BEEN TRAVELING TO MILITARY

358. BASES.

359. I'VE NOTICED THIS—

360. EVERY TIME I PLAY A MILITARY

361. BASE, THE SAME THING HAPPENS—

362. WE START DRINKING.

363. START TALKING POLITICS.

364. THEY BRING UP GAYS IN THE

365. MILITARY.

366. I ALWAYS TELL THEM THE SAME

367. THING— I HOPE THEY PUT

368. THOUSANDS OF GAYS IN THE

369. MILITARY— HUNDREDS OF...

370. MILLIONS!

371. WHOEVER WANTS TO GO—

372. PUT 'EM IN THERE!

373. IN FACT, IF I'M EVER IN

374. THE MILITARY, I WANT TO BE IN

375. AN ALL GAY PLATOON.

376. THE WAY I SEE IT, IF I'M IN A

377. FOXHOLE, AND I'VE GOT A GUN,

378. AND THERE'S A GAY GUY NEXT

379. TO ME, AND HE'S GOT A GUN,

380. MY THEORY'S PRETTY SIMPLE.

381. I WANT THE GUY COVERING MY ASS

382. TO THINK MY ASS IS PRETTY CUTE.

383. I WANT HIM FIGHTING FOR MORE

384. THAN JUST COUNTRY, HERE,

385. YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

386. IF I GET SHOT, I DON'T WANT

387. SOMEBODY GOING TO GO GET A

388. MEDIC— I WANT THEM TO SAY...

389. THEY SHOT LOUIS?

390. YEAH, SEE, IF I'M MISSING

391. IN ACTION, CHUCK NORRIS MIGHT BE

392. BUSY THAT WEEK.

393. THEY CALL FOR VOLUNTEERS TO COME

394. FIND ME, I WANT TO HEAR—

395. GIRL, WE GOTTA GO GET HIM!

396. LOUIS>> I WAS PICKING ON

397. THE SOUTH.

398. I PICK ON THE SOUTH BECAUSE

399. I'M FROM THE SOUTH.

400. I'M ORIGINALLY FROM ATLANTA.

401. YEP.

402. THREE PEOPLE CLAP— THANK YOU

403. FOR THAT ROUND OF INDIFFERENCE.

404. EVERYONE TOGETHER NOW—

405. WHO CARES?

406. THAT'S OKAY— I'M USED TO IT.

407. I MOVED TO NEW YORK—

408. TELL PEOPLE I'M FROM GEORGIA.

409. THEY GO— NO, YOU'RE NOT, MAN.

410. YOU'RE WEARING SHOES.

411. LOOK.

412. COMES FROM STUFF LIKE THE

413. "DUKES OF HAZZARD,"

414. "THE ANDY GRIFFITH SHOW,"

415. "BEVERLY HILLBILLIES,"

416. THE MOVIE, "DELIVERANCE..."

417. YOU GO TO CHINA AND TELL PEOPLE

418. YOU'RE FROM GEORGIA,

419. THEY GO "GEORGIA!"

420. (MAKES PIG SQUEAL

421. WITH CHINESE ACCENT)

422. SO, LIKE I SAID I AM STARTING

423. THE DATING THING.

424. I'VE BEEN WORKING OUT.

425. HOW MANY OF YOU GUYS HERE WORK

426. OUT?

427. ALL RIGHT, JUST THE FOUR OF US,

428. ALL RIGHT GOOD.

429. THE REST YOU WATCHING LATE NIGHT

430. TV.

431. WANNA LOSE WEIGHT?

432. NO.

433. I WORK OUT FOR THE SAME REASON

434. EVERYBODY WORKS OUT.

435. TO LOOK GOOD NAKED.

436. ESPECIALLY GUYS.

437. GUYS WANT TO BE THAT GUY WALKING

438. DOWN THE BEACH IN JAMAICA,

439. NO SHIRT ON.

440. PASS A GROUP OF WOMEN ALL YOU

441. DAMN!

442. DID YOU SEE THAT?

443. THE LAST THING A GUY WANTS TO BE

444. IS THAT GUY WALKING DOWN

445. THE BEACH IN JAMAICA WITH

446. NO SHIRT ON AND HEAR DAMN.

447. OH, MY GOD.

448. DID YOU SEE THAT?

449. BUT I'M STARTING THE WHOLE

450. DATING THING.

451. BEEN READING UP, TOO.

452. YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE—

453. THOSE BOOKS THAT TELL

454. THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MEN

455. AND WOMEN.

456. 'CAUSE THERE IS NO REAL

457. DIFFERENCE.

458. THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS WOMEN

459. AND COMPLEX AND MEN ARE NOT.

460. MEN ARE VERY BASIC—

461. LITTLE SHORT LIST OF NEEDS

462. AND WANTS.

463. YOU MEET THOSE AND WE'RE

464. IN LOVE.

465. AND ALL MEN ARE THE SAME,

466. THAT'S THE BEAUTY OF IT,

467. WE'RE ALL THE SAME.

468. IF YOU'RE A WOMAN AND YOU DON'T

469. UNDERSTAND MEN, CHANCES ARE,

470. YOU'RE THINKING TOO HARD.

471. GIVE YOU AN EXAMPLE—

472. ALL MEN HAVE THE SAME FANTASY,

473. TWO WOMEN.

474. THAT'S 'CAUSE WE'RE BASIC,

475. WE'RE CAVEMEN.

476. ASK THE GUY, WHAT'S GOOD?

477. WOMAN.

478. WHAT'S BETTER?

479. TWO WOMAN.

480. WHAT'S BETTER THAN THAT?

481. FIVE WOMAN!

482. WOMEN CAN DISCUSS THEIR ORGASMS.

483. MINE'S LIKE THIS, MINE'S LIKE

484. THAT.

485. MEN CAN'T DISCUSS THEIR ORGASMS

486. 'CAUSE THEY'RE ALL THE SAME.

487. UHHHH!

488. NOW, I KNOW THAT DOESN'T LOOK

489. LIKE A LOT TO YOU LADIES,

490. BUT BELIEVE ME, WE DO A LOT OF

491. CRAP FOR THAT.

492. FIGHT WARS, BUILD BRIDGES,

493. PAY COVER.

494. I WISH I HAD THAT KIND OF RECOIL

495. AGAIN.

496. TAKE YOUR TIME.

497. NOW WOMEN, YOUR ORGASM,

498. IS A COMPLETE MYSTERY TO US.

499. WE HAVE NO IDEA HOW IT WORKS,

500. WHAT'S GOING ON—

501. COMPLETE MYSTERY.

502. IT'S LIKE...

503. ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR...

504. LOUIS>> SO I'M GONNA DO MY WORLD

505. FAMOUS IMPRESSIONS RIGHT NOW.

506. WORLD FAMOUS IMPRESSIONS.

507. YOU WON'T SEE ANYWHERE ELSE

508. IN THE WORLD, EXCEPT HERE ON

509. THIS STAGE.

510. PEOPLE COME FROM MILES AROUND

511. TO SEE ME DO THESE.

512. PEOPLE WILL COME FROM RAWWAY.

513. MY FIRST IMPRESSION,

514. FOR YOU MUSIC FANS.

515. THIS IS FIVE YEAR OLD

516. BARRY WHITE AND HIS FATHER.

517. FIVE YEAR OLD MUSIC LEGEND,

518. BARRY WHITE AND HIS FATHER.

519. YOU GUYS DO KNOW WHO BARRY WHITE

520. IS, RIGHT?

521. WELL, I'M KINDA ASKING 'CAUSE

522. THIS WHOLE SECTION RIGHT HERE.

523. CAUSE YOU GUYS— THE CLASS

524. REUNION OF SAVED BY THE BELL.

525. THERE'S ZACH, SCREECH, KELLY,

526. SLATER.

527. DON'T WORRY MAN, YOU'RE SLATER.

528. CALM DOWN.

529. ALL RIGHT.

530. THIS IS FIVE YEAR OLD

531. BARRY WHITE AND HIS FATHER.

532. HEY, HEY, BARRY, WHAT'S WRONG?

533. WHY ARE YOU CRYING?

534. OH, DID YOU DROP YOUR ICE-CREAM

535. CONE?

536. GIVE ME YOUR CONE RIGHT THERE

537. ON THE FLOOR.

538. YOU KNOW, I'VE GOT SOME OTHER

539. IMPRESSIONS I CAN DO, PEOPLE.

540. NOW, MY LAST AND FINAL

541. IMPRESSION—

542. USUALLY WHEN I DO THIS ONE,

543. PEOPLE STAND UP, DO THE WAVE,

544. LIGHT LIGHTERS, SCREAM,

545. FREE BIRD, THROW PANTIES

546. ON THE STAGE.

547. GOD I WANT YOU.

548. NO, NO, I'M NOT KIDDING.

549. I WANT YOU IN THE WORST WAY.

550. WHICH IS STANDING UP IN A

551. HAMMOCK.

552. YOU KNOW, AH...

553. I CAN ACTUALLY HEAR PEOPLE DOING

554. THE MATH BACK THERE.

555. 2 DIVIDED BY 4.

556. YEAH.

557. YOU'RE GONNA GET HURT THAT WAY.

558. DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT

559. SWEETY.

560. YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY,

561. ONCE YOU'VE GONE BLACK,

562. YOU CAN'T GET GET CREDIT.

563. AND IT'S TRUE.

564. OH, SO TRUE.

565. THEY CUT UP YOUR CREDIT CARDS.

566. YOU CAN'T RENT A CAR, I KNOW,

567. I'VE BEEN BLACK A WHILE.

568. THIS IS JUST FOR YOU, SWEETIE,

569. THIS IS MYSELF AND MANUTE BOL

570. AT THE END OF A GAME.

571. IF YOU DON'T KNOW

572. WHO MANUTE BOL IS,

573. THAT'S OKAY.

574. HE WAS ONCE THE TALLEST

575. BASKETBALL PLAYER IN THE WORLD.

576. THE MAN'S LIKE SEVEN FOOT TWELVE

577. OR SOMETHING.

578. BIG GUY.

579. THIS IS— SEVEN FOOT TWELVE,

580. FIVE PEOPLE LAUGH.

581. HEY— GO PUBLIC SCHOOL.

582. NOT TRYING TO BE CONDENSATING

583. WITCH IS WATER STICKING TO A

584. COLD GLASS.

585. OKAY, THIS IS JUST FOR YOU.

586. THIS IS MYSELF AND MANUTE BOL

587. AT THE— GOD I WANT—

588. THIS IS MYSELF—

589. THE MOST BEAUTIFUL PERSONALITY—

590. THIS IS MYSELF AND MENUTE BOL

591. AT THE END OF A GAME.

592. WHOO!

593. GREAT GAME, MANUTE!

594. FANTASTIC GAME.

595. HEY, YOU PASS THE SOAP?

596. GET OUT A HERE, MAN.

597. WHAT THE HELL-

598. 'CAUSE HE'S SO TALL.

599. SHE'S ACTING LIKE SHE'S NEVER

600. SEEN ONE BEFORE.

601. MAYBE NOT THAT SHADE.

602. YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN FANTASTIC.

603. MY NAME'S LOUIS RAMEY.

604. GOOD NIGHT.

605. CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY

606. COMEDY CENTRAL.