1. It's a whole different attitude.Copy !req
2. I mean, I believe that this is gonna
make a new man out of me.Copy !req
3. I'm skipping beer,
giving up the cigars...Copy !req
4. Now she's thin again.Copy !req
5. That's how he was. He wanted to
do everything right now.Copy !req
6. Can I ask you a personal question?Copy !req
7. What do you do
with all that money?Copy !req
8. What do you mean, "reputation"?Copy !req
9. Did your husband
have any health problems?Copy !req
10. Get off my back, Milo.Copy !req
11. All right. Now, let me
have my coffee first.Copy !req
12. He's quite a character, isn't he?Copy !req
13. And those cigars you smoke...Copy !req
14. they're gonna kill you.Copy !req
15. Mr. Janus' office.Copy !req
16. Hi, Jess. Buddy. Did I catch him in?Copy !req
17. You did, but he's on the other line.Copy !req
18. When he gets off, have him call me
at the Chatsworth place.Copy !req
19. And, Jess, it's kind of important.Copy !req
20. Critical important
or urgent important?Copy !req
21. It's both.Copy !req
22. Right.Copy !req
23. Arnold...Copy !req
24. don't tell me about mark-ups.Copy !req
25. These people paid a lot of money
for a Milo Janus franchise...Copy !req
26. and they're going to pay
a lot more to operate them.Copy !req
27. What are you telling me?Copy !req
28. I'm telling you...Copy !req
29. to raise the price to $288 a gross.
Two gross minimum.Copy !req
30. Two gross?
Where do you want the money?Copy !req
31. That's right, Arnold. I want the money
deposited in my New York account.Copy !req
32. And, Arnold, my accountant
is checking the books, so don't be late.Copy !req
33. All right.Copy !req
34. All right, Arnold.
I'll talk to you on Friday.Copy !req
35. Yes?Copy !req
36. Mr. Castle called, Mr. Janus.Copy !req
37. He's at the Chatsworth spa.
He'd like you to call him right away.Copy !req
38. Call him back for me, will you?
And Jessica, don't record this one.Copy !req
39. Yes, sir.Copy !req
40. Hi, Mr. Janus.Copy !req
41. Hey, Charlie. How's it going?Copy !req
42. - Not bad.
- Say, you're looking good.Copy !req
43. He still in the office?Copy !req
44. He's got files all over the place.Copy !req
45. You want me in there with him?Copy !req
46. No, I think it's better
if I talk to him alone.Copy !req
47. Milo, talking is not gonna help.Copy !req
48. We'll see.Copy !req
49. Hello, Gene.Copy !req
50. Milo Janus.Copy !req
51. Milo...Copy !req
52. you're a thief.Copy !req
53. Now, what kind of a greeting is that?Copy !req
54. Did your boy Castle
tell you to come up here?Copy !req
55. I thought he would.Copy !req
56. I should have torn his head off.Copy !req
57. Calm down, Gene.
Stress is bad for your blood pressure.Copy !req
58. There's nothing wrong
with my blood pressure.Copy !req
59. It's my bank account
that's worrying me.Copy !req
60. You've got a nice racket going, Milo.Copy !req
61. So smooth.Copy !req
62. Gene, why don't you please tell me
what's bothering you?Copy !req
63. This is what's bothering me.Copy !req
64. An invoice from the Green Eagle
Gym Equipment Corporation.Copy !req
65. $2,650.Copy !req
66. And I can buy the same stuff
from a discount house half-price, retail.Copy !req
67. But not the same quality.Copy !req
68. Get off my back, Milo.
You own that company.Copy !req
69. And...Copy !req
70. Sentry Office Supplies.
And Lewis Furniture Company.Copy !req
71. Gene, I told you when you bought
this franchise...Copy !req
72. that you were going to have to deal
with certain suppliers.Copy !req
73. Now, I told you that, Gene.Copy !req
74. All owned by you.Copy !req
75. My mark-up is very small
but I have to maintain quality.Copy !req
76. - That's what gives me control.
- You've got control, all right.Copy !req
77. In the meantime I'm being bilked.Copy !req
78. Me and all the other suckers
who plunked down $150,000...Copy !req
79. for one of these...Copy !req
80. second-rate operations.Copy !req
81. Where does the money go, Milo?
What happens to the money?Copy !req
82. Advertising. Promotion.Copy !req
83. Every cent that I make
is reinvested in the company.Copy !req
84. When I grow, Gene, you grow.Copy !req
85. Bull.Copy !req
86. Now, you may be able to fool
those other suckers, but not me.Copy !req
87. No chance.Copy !req
88. I didn't spend 18 years
as corporate controller for nothing.Copy !req
89. And I can smell flim-flam
right down to the paper clips...Copy !req
90. you make me buy.Copy !req
91. And I'm gonna prove it.
It's here someplace.Copy !req
92. And I'm gonna stay at this desk
till I find it.Copy !req
93. I don't care if it takes a weekend,
a week, a month...Copy !req
94. but I'm going to find it.Copy !req
95. Gene, I don't know what you're talking about.
I have no secrets from you.Copy !req
96. Oh, really?Copy !req
97. How about...Copy !req
98. Bolingbrooke Travel Corporation,
Bristol, England?Copy !req
99. I stumbled on that almost by accident.Copy !req
100. That's how you're getting the funds
out of the country, isn't it, Milo?Copy !req
101. I can smell it.Copy !req
102. I really don't know
what you're talking about.Copy !req
103. All right.
But when I get things put together...Copy !req
104. you can explain it all
to the Securities and Exchange Commission.Copy !req
105. In the meantime...Copy !req
106. I'm gonna get the rest
of these suckers together...Copy !req
107. and we're gonna start
a class-action case against you.Copy !req
108. And between the SEC and us...Copy !req
109. I'm gonna hook you, Milo.Copy !req
110. Gene, you're working too hard.Copy !req
111. That's what's wrong with you.
You need some rest.Copy !req
112. I'm serious.Copy !req
113. Have a nice day.Copy !req
114. Well?Copy !req
115. Don't worry about it.Copy !req
116. Look, he said he's working late,
after closing.Copy !req
117. You want me to stick around,
keep an eye on him?Copy !req
118. No, let him work.
He won't find anything.Copy !req
119. And in eight months, I'm gonna be in my villa
overlooking the Adriatic...Copy !req
120. with two million in Swiss francs
to keep me warm.Copy !req
121. Buddy, relax, will you?
You worry too much.Copy !req
122. To show you how much that guy bothers me
let's throw a little party tonight at my house.Copy !req
123. Invite that little girl.
What's her name?Copy !req
124. - Frieda.
- Invite Frieda.Copy !req
125. Charlie's got us a horror film.
X-rated and uncut.Copy !req
126. See you at my place, huh?Copy !req
127. Hey, young lady, what are you still doing here?
I thought you'd be home by now.Copy !req
128. I didn't know if you'd still
be needing me, sir.Copy !req
129. You usually call if I can go.Copy !req
130. Well, I didn't call, actually,
because I'm a devious man...Copy !req
131. and I wanted to talk to you.Copy !req
132. I'm having a little get-together at my place
and if you don't have any other plans...Copy !req
133. I won't by 6:30.Copy !req
134. Good.Copy !req
135. I have to go and see Howard Parker
around 7:30.Copy !req
136. I don't know how long
that's gonna take.Copy !req
137. So I think it would be a good idea
if you filled in for me until I get there.Copy !req
138. You don't mind driving
yourself out to the house, do you?Copy !req
139. I think I can handle that.Copy !req
140. Good.Copy !req
141. You know, there's one thing
that bothers me about you.Copy !req
142. What's that?Copy !req
143. You're a little unsure of yourself.Copy !req
144. I'm very unsure.
But I'm encouraged by your response.Copy !req
145. Key?Copy !req
146. It's in the mailbox by the door.Copy !req
147. Right.Copy !req
148. I think I'll file today's tapes.Copy !req
149. That's all right, let me do that.Copy !req
150. I want you to get
to the house by 8:30, okay?Copy !req
151. How's 8:15?Copy !req
152. Hi, Jessica.Copy !req
153. Gene Stafford. Can I speak to him?Copy !req
154. Hi, Jessica.Copy !req
155. Gene Stafford. Can I speak to him?Copy !req
156. Hello, Gene.Copy !req
157. How did you get in here?Copy !req
158. Well, I thought I'd stop by...Copy !req
159. and try and help you answer
some of those questions.Copy !req
160. Well, I'm doing just fine without
your help, thank you very much.Copy !req
161. How did you get in here?Copy !req
162. With the master key.Copy !req
163. I have one to all my franchises.
Sometimes it comes in handy.Copy !req
164. Well, you can just help yourself
right out the door.Copy !req
165. Bits and pieces.Copy !req
166. That's all I had a week ago.
Nothing really damaging.Copy !req
167. But now,
it's starting to all fit together.Copy !req
168. You're sharp, Milo.Copy !req
169. Oh, you're sharp.Copy !req
170. But once you wipe away
all that camouflage...Copy !req
171. it still adds up to grand larceny.Copy !req
172. Grand larceny?Copy !req
173. Come Monday morning this neat little world
of yours is gonna...Copy !req
174. come crushing down on your skull.Copy !req
175. And it couldn't happen to a nicer guy.Copy !req
176. That stuff will kill you, Gene.Copy !req
177. Oh, I'm afraid not.Copy !req
178. I plan to live for a long, long time.Copy !req
179. I'm afraid not.Copy !req
180. So, anyway...Copy !req
181. Lennie gets me off to the side...Copy !req
182. and he says to me, "Buddy,
what are you trying to do to me?"Copy !req
183. He knew what you were trying to do.
He just wanted to hear you admit it.Copy !req
184. Listen, if I had any scruples, you think
I'd be in this racket?Copy !req
185. This is worse than that
real estate deal in San Diego...Copy !req
186. if you can believe that.Copy !req
187. Hey, host! It's about time.Copy !req
188. Hey, I'm really sorry I'm late.Copy !req
189. When does the show start?Copy !req
190. Hey, Buddy was telling me how much
trouble you had getting this print.Copy !req
191. Yeah. Hey, listen, I'm sorry I'm late.Copy !req
192. - But you know that creep Parker?
- The automobile dealer?Copy !req
193. Yeah, well, he said he wanted to
talk to me about opening a store...Copy !req
194. so I drove all across this town
and the creep is closed.Copy !req
195. Can you imagine?
Driving across the town for nothing?Copy !req
196. I'll be with you in a minute.Copy !req
197. Hey, you thirsty?Copy !req
198. Yeah, could I have
some orange juice?Copy !req
199. Please. Some Vitamin C.Copy !req
200. Hello.Copy !req
201. Hello.Copy !req
202. Hi, Jessica.Copy !req
203. Gene Stafford. Can I speak to him?Copy !req
204. Oh. Oh, yes, Mr. Stafford.Copy !req
205. Just a second.Copy !req
206. Who is it?Copy !req
207. - Gene Stafford.
- Thank you.Copy !req
208. Hello, Gene. Where are you?Copy !req
209. Still at the gym?
Don't you know what time it is?Copy !req
210. You can exercise anytime.
We're having a party.Copy !req
211. Of course you're invited.Copy !req
212. Change clothes and come on over.
We'll be going till dawn.Copy !req
213. Okay, suit yourself. Are you alone?Copy !req
214. Well, take it easy.Copy !req
215. Don't do anything too strenuous.
I don't want you to pass out.Copy !req
216. Okay, you know what's best.
I'll see you on Monday, huh, Gene?Copy !req
217. Bye.Copy !req
218. That guy is crazy.Copy !req
219. He's been working in the office all day,
you know what he's doing now?Copy !req
220. He's working out in the gym.Copy !req
221. He's a walking testimonial
for the Milo Janus health program.Copy !req
222. With his gut? Are you kidding?Copy !req
223. - Morning.
- Morning, LieutenantCopy !req
224. Good morning.Copy !req
225. It happened last night.Copy !req
226. The place was closed.
He decided to work out alone.Copy !req
227. His name is Stafford.Copy !req
228. All right. Now, let me
have my coffee first.Copy !req
229. Hey, Nolan.
You got this thing dusted yet?Copy !req
230. Yeah. All finished.Copy !req
231. Let's go.Copy !req
232. What did you say?
You said that he was here alone...Copy !req
233. he decided to work out?Copy !req
234. His name was Eugene Stafford.
He owns the place.Copy !req
235. The janitor said that he worked late
last night.Copy !req
236. Could've been an accident,
a heart attack, anything.Copy !req
237. You know, before coffee, I'm up,
I'm walking around, but I'm not awake.Copy !req
238. Sure, Lieutenant.Copy !req
239. Lieutenant...Copy !req
240. telephone call for you.
You can take it right through that door.Copy !req
241. Telephone?Copy !req
242. Who the hell's calling me this hour?Copy !req
243. There's a call for me.
Where can I take it?Copy !req
244. Well, there's a phone
in Stafford's office.Copy !req
245. Straight ahead.
First door to your right.Copy !req
246. Hello.Copy !req
247. What are you doing up?
You know what time it is?Copy !req
248. It's...Copy !req
249. Does anybody have the time?Copy !req
250. It's 6:30.Copy !req
251. It's 6:30.Copy !req
252. I'm not yelling.Copy !req
253. Who's coming?Copy !req
254. Wait a minute.
Harry and Ethel, Norman...Copy !req
255. Uncle Gene, and the twins.Copy !req
256. Well, how would I know what to feed them?
What did you feed them the last time?Copy !req
257. You want to give them spaghetti,
give them spaghetti.Copy !req
258. Who's on a diet?Copy !req
259. Oh, that's ridiculous.Copy !req
260. Wait a minute.Copy !req
261. Would you be quiet
for two seconds?Copy !req
262. I got an idea.
I'll bring something back.Copy !req
263. Chinese, okay?Copy !req
264. You decide what you want,
you call the place...Copy !req
265. and on the way home, I'll pick it up.Copy !req
266. That's right.Copy !req
267. Look, I gotta go back to work.Copy !req
268. I'm gonna hang up.Copy !req
269. You can keep talking,
but I'm gonna hang up.Copy !req
270. Hey, you.Copy !req
271. Hey, Charlie, what are you doing?Copy !req
272. Oh. Excuse me, no, I was just looking
at these marks on the floor.Copy !req
273. - This floor is recently waxed, isn't it?
- You're damn right.Copy !req
274. Lieutenant Columbo. I'm from the police.
What do you do here, sir?Copy !req
275. I'm the custodian, Murphy.Copy !req
276. I'd appreciate it, Lieutenant,
if you could keep these guys off the floor.Copy !req
277. I spent an hour last night waxing up
to get rid of marks like this.Copy !req
278. Oh, yeah?Copy !req
279. - What kind of marks are these?
- They're heel marks, Lieutenant.Copy !req
280. You cops don't care how hard a guy
has to work, do you?Copy !req
281. You don't have to clean this floor.
I do.Copy !req
282. Yeah. Look, I'm sorry about that.Copy !req
283. What time did you say
you waxed the floor last night?Copy !req
284. Right after closing. 6:00.Copy !req
285. Are those reading glasses?Copy !req
286. Yeah.Copy !req
287. May I borrow them?Copy !req
288. You say no one walked on this floor
after you waxed it?Copy !req
289. Nobody except you guys
and maybe Mr. Stafford.Copy !req
290. He was working in his office
last night when I left.Copy !req
291. Only it wasn't him, because he was
wearing sneakers like you're supposed to.Copy !req
292. Well, listen, you're absolutely right.Copy !req
293. I'm gonna tell the guys
to be more careful.Copy !req
294. - Thank you.
- Thank you very much.Copy !req
295. Oh...Copy !req
296. Mr. Murphy...Copy !req
297. - Could I look at your shoes?
- My shoes?Copy !req
298. Yeah, the bottom of your shoes.Copy !req
299. Oh, yeah, sure.Copy !req
300. Thank you very much.Copy !req
301. Oh...Copy !req
302. don't wax that until I tell you.Copy !req
303. Wait a minute, fellas. Excuse me.Copy !req
304. You find something, Lieutenant?Copy !req
305. May I see your shoes?Copy !req
306. My shoes?Copy !req
307. Yeah, the bottoms of your shoes.Copy !req
308. - Black.
- Yeah, sure, they're black.Copy !req
309. Black heels.Copy !req
310. A lot of fellas in uniform,
they wear black shoes, right?Copy !req
311. They all better. Why?Copy !req
312. Newly waxed floor, there's a bunch
of brown heel marks in there.Copy !req
313. So?Copy !req
314. Anybody here have brown soles
or brown heels?Copy !req
315. No.Copy !req
316. Check your shoes, fellas.
Any brown heels?Copy !req
317. No.Copy !req
318. No, Lieutenant.Copy !req
319. Mr. Murphy?Copy !req
320. Yeah.Copy !req
321. Mr. Stafford have a locker?Copy !req
322. - Sure.
- I'd like to see it.Copy !req
323. Right this way, Lieutenant.Copy !req
324. Okay, take him on out.Copy !req
325. This is it.Copy !req
326. It's locked.Copy !req
327. How come it's locked?Copy !req
328. Maybe he didn't want nobody
to take anything, Lieutenant.Copy !req
329. - But you said he was here alone.
- He was.Copy !req
330. He was certainly a very careful man.Copy !req
331. Can you open it?Copy !req
332. Sure. I got a master key right here.Copy !req
333. I guess because Mr. Stafford
was working late last night...Copy !req
334. you didn't clean his office?Copy !req
335. No, I figured since he was still here
when I left that I'd get it in the morning.Copy !req
336. The stain on his rug, the rug in his office.
What is that, coffee?Copy !req
337. What stain?
That rug's only five weeks old.Copy !req
338. Be careful, don't touch anything.
I want to dust these for prints.Copy !req
339. Brown heels.Copy !req
340. Brown heels.
That's very good, Lieutenant.Copy !req
341. They're brown, all right.Copy !req
342. Oh, Lieutenant, we checked all the windows
and doors and everything.Copy !req
343. There's no sign of forced entry.Copy !req
344. Did you find a key on him?Copy !req
345. Yeah. Locker room key
next to his body on the floor.Copy !req
346. Doc, you got a minute?Copy !req
347. How did he die?Copy !req
348. Strictly unofficial?Copy !req
349. On my mother's eyes.Copy !req
350. I'd say he was probably exercising
with that barbell...Copy !req
351. it slipped, came crashing down
on his neck...Copy !req
352. and crushed his windpipe.Copy !req
353. You're sure?Copy !req
354. Well, I'm sure
his windpipe was crushed.Copy !req
355. But who knows? Maybe he died
of a coronary first.Copy !req
356. Right. Maybe he was poisoned.Copy !req
357. Poisoned?Copy !req
358. He sent out for some Chinese food
last night.Copy !req
359. Yes, well, maybe some local tong
had it in for him.Copy !req
360. Or the delivery boy.
Or maybe he just died of overeating.Copy !req
361. What are you trying to tell me?Copy !req
362. Yeah, well, I'm trying to tell you
to wait for the autopsy.Copy !req
363. Right.Copy !req
364. Yes?Copy !req
365. I'm looking for...Copy !req
366. a Milo Janus.Copy !req
367. Are you sure?Copy !req
368. Am I sure what, ma'am?Copy !req
369. You sounded as if you weren't sure
who you were looking for.Copy !req
370. Milo Janus. Sure. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
371. Well, this is his house.Copy !req
372. No, I was just thinking
about something else.Copy !req
373. Lieutenant Columbo, Police.Copy !req
374. I see, Lieutenant. Come in.Copy !req
375. Milo's not here right now.
He's down at the beach, running.Copy !req
376. Running? Oh, sure.Copy !req
377. He must do a lot of that.Copy !req
378. Mrs. Janus?Copy !req
379. I'm Jessica Conroy.
Mr. Janus' secretary.Copy !req
380. Ah, yes. I see.Copy !req
381. Can I ask you a personal question?Copy !req
382. You don't have to answer.Copy !req
383. So, ask.Copy !req
384. How old is Mr. Janus?Copy !req
385. 'Cause I got a friend,
he swears he's 51.Copy !req
386. He's 53.Copy !req
387. Fifty-three!Copy !req
388. Oh, that's fantastic.Copy !req
389. And that's from the exercising?Copy !req
390. Yeah.Copy !req
391. I would've bet he wasn't 35.Copy !req
392. Remarkable.Copy !req
393. Oh, hi. Milo,
this is Lieutenant...Copy !req
394. - Columbo.
- Columbo.Copy !req
395. How do you do, Lieutenant?
Pleasure, nice meeting you.Copy !req
396. We were just...Copy !req
397. I was remarking to your secretary what
fantastic shape you're in.Copy !req
398. Oh, thank you very much.Copy !req
399. Anybody can do it, if they're willing
to put some effort into it.Copy !req
400. Fresh air, exercise, proper diet...Copy !req
401. that's the key to good health
and long life.Copy !req
402. I gotta tell you what a pleasure it is
to meet you.Copy !req
403. Your television show...Copy !req
404. saved my marriage.Copy !req
405. Oh?Copy !req
406. My wife, always a very happy woman...Copy !req
407. last summer, she suddenly
started getting depressed.Copy !req
408. Started to think she was getting too fat.Copy !req
409. And when she's depressed, that's bad
because all she wants to do is eat.Copy !req
410. Lasagna. Rigatoni.Copy !req
411. And the more she ate, the fatter she got.Copy !req
412. Exactly.Copy !req
413. Now, a couple of months ago, she started
watching your television show...Copy !req
414. the one with the exercise.
She got involved...Copy !req
415. every day.Copy !req
416. On her back...Copy !req
417. kicking her legs.Copy !req
418. You know, from the waist,
down, up...Copy !req
419. down, up.Copy !req
420. Now she's thin again.Copy !req
421. Well, she was never exactly thin.Copy !req
422. I wouldn't let her because I happen
to like a woman that...Copy !req
423. Well, you know,
that's something else but...Copy !req
424. the thing is that she got all
wrapped up in these exercises...Copy !req
425. so she forgot to be depressed.
So she didn't eat so much.Copy !req
426. But, you know,
I gotta tell you this...Copy !req
427. the things that she's been buying...
I wouldn't eat much of that, either.Copy !req
428. Those soybeans, the wheat germ...Copy !req
429. not that it's not good for you.
You know, I'm sure it's terrific...Copy !req
430. but, see, I happen
to like a bowl of chili...Copy !req
431. I like a rare steak now and then...Copy !req
432. Lieutenant, I'm sure you didn't come all the
way out here to discuss your eating habits.Copy !req
433. No, sir. As a matter of fact, I didn't.Copy !req
434. Maybe I'm just trying to avoid it
because I don't have pleasant news.Copy !req
435. I believe you knew
a Mr. Eugene Stafford.Copy !req
436. Knew?Copy !req
437. - Yes, sir. I'm afraid he's dead.
- Oh, no.Copy !req
438. I'm sorry, ma'am.Copy !req
439. Gene, dead.Copy !req
440. How, Lieutenant?Copy !req
441. He was alone last night in the gym and...Copy !req
442. He had an attack.Copy !req
443. I knew it.Copy !req
444. What do you mean?Copy !req
445. I said to him last night not to try
to do too much too quickly...Copy !req
446. without supervision.Copy !req
447. You spoke to him last night?Copy !req
448. Yeah. He called me last night
from the gym around...Copy !req
449. What time was it, Jessica?Copy !req
450. I don't know...Copy !req
451. A little after 9:00, I think.Copy !req
452. I better write this down.Copy !req
453. What time did you say that was?Copy !req
454. A little after 9:00.Copy !req
455. And what did he say, exactly?
Did he sound as though he were alone?Copy !req
456. As a matter of fact, Lieutenant,
he said he was alone.Copy !req
457. You know, this is all so senseless.Copy !req
458. I warned him against working out heavily
without proper supervision.Copy !req
459. A man his age, you know,
it's not a good idea.Copy !req
460. I asked him to come over
to the party...Copy !req
461. but he said he'd already changed
into his gym clothing.Copy !req
462. He was gonna work out for about
a half hour and then go home.Copy !req
463. A man his age...Copy !req
464. sitting around for years,
getting fat and flabby...Copy !req
465. and then he suddenly realized
how he's abused his body...Copy !req
466. tries to correct it just like that.Copy !req
467. That's why he had that heart attack,
Lieutenant.Copy !req
468. Well, we're not sure of that.Copy !req
469. All we know is that he was working out
with a barbell.Copy !req
470. He could've collapsed.Copy !req
471. Or it could've slipped.Copy !req
472. But it fell on his neck
and crushed his windpipe.Copy !req
473. Oh, my God.Copy !req
474. I'm sorry, ma'am.Copy !req
475. Perhaps you'd like to sit down.Copy !req
476. Oh, no, I'll be all right.Copy !req
477. Why don't you change clothes?
We have to be at the office at 10:00 anyway.Copy !req
478. All right. Yes, I'll do that.Copy !req
479. I won't take up any more
of your time, sir.Copy !req
480. Thank you very much.Copy !req
481. Boy, that must have hurt
like the devil.Copy !req
482. - What's that?
- That burn mark.Copy !req
483. That is a burn mark, isn't it?Copy !req
484. Yeah, that's a burn mark.Copy !req
485. Yeah...Copy !req
486. I accidentally put my hand under the
hot water this morning while I was shaving.Copy !req
487. Yeah, they hurt like the devil.Copy !req
488. Yeah, the last time that happened to me
I spilled some hot coffee on myself.Copy !req
489. That's what happens, you know.
You don't think what you're doing.Copy !req
490. Oh, one more thing, sir.
I went out to see Mr. Stafford...Copy !req
491. I understood he was married, but there was
no one else there in the house.Copy !req
492. Gene and Ruth have been
separated for months.Copy !req
493. She's living at the Crestlane Apartments
in Beverly Hills, Lieutenant.Copy !req
494. Lieutenant, I really don't know
how I can help you.Copy !req
495. First I knew about Gene's death...Copy !req
496. was when a man from your department
came by this morning.Copy !req
497. Yes, ma'am. And I'm terribly sorry
for your loss.Copy !req
498. Oh.Copy !req
499. Well, I'm not so sure
I lost Gene last night. I mean...Copy !req
500. maybe it was a few months ago,
a few years ago.Copy !req
501. You see, last September,
when our son Robbie went off to school...Copy !req
502. it was the first time that Gene and I
had been alone together in 18 years...Copy !req
503. and we found that we didn't really have
a lot to say to each other.Copy !req
504. Well, that happens.Copy !req
505. It does. You're sure that...Copy !req
506. Sit down, then.Copy !req
507. Thank you.Copy !req
508. Well, now...Copy !req
509. what can I do for you?Copy !req
510. I was wondering, ma'am...Copy !req
511. did your husband
have any health problems?Copy !req
512. Blood pressure...Copy !req
513. heart condition...Copy !req
514. anything like that?Copy !req
515. I mean, not that I know of.Copy !req
516. Lieutenant, I'm really curious.Copy !req
517. When...Copy !req
518. one of your men came by
this morning...Copy !req
519. he said that Gene had been killed by
a weight falling on him or something.Copy !req
520. Well, we'll know more
after the autopsy.Copy !req
521. I was wondering, do you know of anybody
that your husband had problems with?Copy !req
522. - Personal problems or business problems?
- Oh, yes.Copy !req
523. I mean, between Milo Janus and me,
he didn't have anything but problems.Copy !req
524. And what kind of a problem
did he have with Mr. Janus?Copy !req
525. Business. I mean, he was just very upset
by the way business was going.Copy !req
526. And our lawyers were negotiating
a property settlement...Copy !req
527. and when talk came up
about the health spa...Copy !req
528. I understood Gene was gonna sell it
as quickly as possible.Copy !req
529. Why are you asking me all this?Copy !req
530. Gene's death was accidental,
wasn't it?Copy !req
531. Well, it certainly appears that way,
yes, ma'am.Copy !req
532. But you don't think so, huh?Copy !req
533. Oh, I don't think anything
at this point. It's too early.Copy !req
534. Well, if you're looking for a motive...Copy !req
535. I certainly had one.Copy !req
536. I gave Gene everything.
He gave me nothing back.Copy !req
537. I should be bitter.
I'm not. I loved him.Copy !req
538. And I don't have an alibi
for last night.Copy !req
539. Well, I wasn't gonna ask you anything
like that, ma'am.Copy !req
540. Oh.Copy !req
541. Well, thank you very much.
You've been very helpful.Copy !req
542. Sure.Copy !req
543. Oh, there is one other thing.Copy !req
544. How did your husband
get involved with Mr. Janus?Copy !req
545. I don't know what you mean.Copy !req
546. Well, how did they meet?
Have they been friends long?Copy !req
547. No. No, they haven't,
and they met...Copy !req
548. just a few months ago...Copy !req
549. at a party given by Buddy Castle.
He's a mutual friend.Copy !req
550. - Thank you.
- Sure.Copy !req
551. Oh, I almost forgot.
Maybe you can help me.Copy !req
552. Who is Lacey?Copy !req
553. Lacey?Copy !req
554. Yes, I noticed several entries
in your husband's calendar.Copy !req
555. "Speak to Lacey. Call Lacey."
But there was no phone number.Copy !req
556. No?Copy !req
557. Wait, yeah.Copy !req
558. When Gene was working
for Tricon Industries...Copy !req
559. there was a man named Lacey.Copy !req
560. Lewis Lacey.Copy !req
561. Lewis?Copy !req
562. L-e-w or L-o-u?Copy !req
563. I don't know. I mean,
might not even be the same man.Copy !req
564. - Lewis Lacey.
- Right.Copy !req
565. - Thank you.
- Sure.Copy !req
566. Bye-bye.Copy !req
567. With a knick-knack, paddy whackCopy !req
568. Throw the dog a boneCopy !req
569. This old man is going homeCopy !req
570. Oh, this old man, he played twoCopy !req
571. He played knick-knack on my shoeCopy !req
572. With a...Copy !req
573. Mr. Janus!Copy !req
574. Mr. Janus!Copy !req
575. Mr. Janus!Copy !req
576. Mr. Janus...Copy !req
577. I stopped by your place.Copy !req
578. Your housekeeper told me
you were down here swimming.Copy !req
579. Twenty minutes a day.
You ought to try it, Columbo.Copy !req
580. I'm afraid not, sir. I can't swim.Copy !req
581. I don't even like a deep tub.Copy !req
582. What can I do for you?Copy !req
583. Well, I just want to check
a few things out, sir.Copy !req
584. We found that the autopsy report
confirmed what we originally thought.Copy !req
585. There's no question about it...Copy !req
586. that Mr. Stafford died of suffocation
when his windpipe got crushed.Copy !req
587. That doesn't surprise you,
does it?Copy !req
588. No, sir.Copy !req
589. But they did find out something
else and that bothers me.Copy !req
590. It seems as though Mr. Stafford sent out
for a large meal around 7:30.Copy !req
591. Chinese.Copy !req
592. Chinese?Copy !req
593. Yes, sir.Copy !req
594. He ordered some egg foo Yung...Copy !req
595. and he had some egg rolls...Copy !req
596. barbecued spare ribs...Copy !req
597. pork fried rice.Copy !req
598. Slow poison.Copy !req
599. I guess he was hungry.Copy !req
600. He told the delivery boy
he was hungry.Copy !req
601. Apparently, he'd been working
at his desk all day and he skipped lunch.Copy !req
602. So what?Copy !req
603. Well...Copy !req
604. I happened to be reading
this book of yours...Copy !req
605. The Milo Janus Guide
to Health and Fitness...Copy !req
606. and... Incidentally, it is
a terrific book.Copy !req
607. But it says in here somewhere...Copy !req
608. that strenuous exercise
after you eat is very bad.Copy !req
609. That's right, Lieutenant.Copy !req
610. Don't you think that's strange, sir?Copy !req
611. That Mr. Stafford
would eat a huge meal...Copy !req
612. and a half hour or so later
work out with a huge barbell?Copy !req
613. No, not really, Lieutenant.
Not knowing Gene.Copy !req
614. That's how he was.
He wanted to do everything right now.Copy !req
615. Forget about the rules.Copy !req
616. Lieutenant, look, I've got an
appointment in about an hour.Copy !req
617. Well, there's just a couple of other things
that I'd like to ask you.Copy !req
618. All right, well...Copy !req
619. why don't you ask me the questions
while I continue my workout, huh?Copy !req
620. - Yes, sir. Certainly.
- Good.Copy !req
621. Come on, Lieutenant.Copy !req
622. Get those knees up. That's it.Copy !req
623. Come on.Copy !req
624. 30 minutes a day, Columbo. That's all.
You'll be a new man.Copy !req
625. I'm out of shape, sir.Copy !req
626. No question.Copy !req
627. And those cigars you smoke...Copy !req
628. they're gonna kill you.Copy !req
629. Yes, sir.Copy !req
630. I tell you,
that's how I feel right now.Copy !req
631. Said you had some questions.Copy !req
632. Yes, sir.Copy !req
633. I...Copy !req
634. I just want to catch my breath.Copy !req
635. Well, you go ahead.Copy !req
636. I can split my concentration.Copy !req
637. So whenever you're ready...Copy !req
638. you just go ahead, huh?Copy !req
639. Well...Copy !req
640. yes, when I'm ready.Copy !req
641. Oh, I wanted to ask you
about a Mr. Castle.Copy !req
642. Who?Copy !req
643. Mr. Castle. Buddy Castle.Copy !req
644. Oh, Buddy. Sure.Copy !req
645. You must have known him
a long time.Copy !req
646. Yeah, Buddy and I go way back.Copy !req
647. He's quite a character, isn't he?Copy !req
648. How's that, Lieutenant?Copy !req
649. Well, what I mean, sir, is...Copy !req
650. Well, I understand
he's got quite a reputation.Copy !req
651. What do you mean, "reputation"?Copy !req
652. Well, what I mean, sir, is...Copy !req
653. he has a record.Copy !req
654. A criminal record.Copy !req
655. You knew about that?Copy !req
656. Yeah.Copy !req
657. Three years' probation...Copy !req
658. for a fraud conviction in Florida.Copy !req
659. Eleven years ago.Copy !req
660. I know everything I'm supposed to know
about people I deal with, Columbo.Copy !req
661. Let me tell you something.
Buddy is no thief.Copy !req
662. He's a victim of circumstances.Copy !req
663. Well...Copy !req
664. the circumstances, sir, at least as far
as I understand them...Copy !req
665. are that...Copy !req
666. he and his partners,
they stole nearly $400,000...Copy !req
667. from some unsuspecting investors.Copy !req
668. It was an oil speculation.Copy !req
669. Some partners.Copy !req
670. They're the ones
that should have gone to jail.Copy !req
671. Buddy was an innocent bystander...Copy !req
672. and I'm happy to have given him a break.Copy !req
673. Well, that's wonderful.Copy !req
674. I mean, wonderful that a man in your
position would take that attitude.Copy !req
675. I don't care what people think.Copy !req
676. Buddy is as honest as I am.Copy !req
677. Yes, sir.Copy !req
678. You want a shoelace or something?Copy !req
679. Oh, no, sir. I think this will...
I'll get this, thank you.Copy !req
680. It'll be good if I can get the knot
through the hole.Copy !req
681. I got the knot too low. I don't know
if I can get it through here.Copy !req
682. Lieutenant.Copy !req
683. Yes, sir?Copy !req
684. Can I ask you a question?Copy !req
685. Yes, sir.Copy !req
686. Why are you here?Copy !req
687. Sir?Copy !req
688. Why are you here?
Why are you sitting there in that chair...Copy !req
689. asking me these questions?Copy !req
690. Gene Stafford slipped.
He fell. He died.Copy !req
691. Unfortunate, yes...Copy !req
692. but just an unfortunate
accident, nothing more.Copy !req
693. Well, you see, sir, we're
not really certain of that yet.Copy !req
694. Oh, you mean that...Copy !req
695. maybe the egg foo Yung
he ate just before he exercised?Copy !req
696. No, sir, it was
the scuff marks, really.Copy !req
697. Scuff marks?Copy !req
698. Yes, sir.Copy !req
699. You see...Copy !req
700. we found these scuff marks
there on the...Copy !req
701. I'll be a son of a gun.Copy !req
702. I remember when I was a kid,
my grandfather...Copy !req
703. he had a piece of furniture,
it was exactly like this.Copy !req
704. Your grandfather must have been
a very wealthy man.Copy !req
705. This piece is over 200 years old.Copy !req
706. Well, that sounds right.
My grandfather, he only had old furniture.Copy !req
707. You know, he didn't
believe in buying new.Copy !req
708. Just like this.
There was a mirror here...Copy !req
709. and on this side...Copy !req
710. Would you like to sit down?Copy !req
711. Oh, yes. Sorry.Copy !req
712. And a mirror on that side.Copy !req
713. What about those scuff marks?Copy !req
714. Oh, the scuff marks. Right.
Gee, I almost forgot.Copy !req
715. What about them?Copy !req
716. Oh, yeah...Copy !req
717. on a newly waxed gym floor,
scuff marks.Copy !req
718. - Yeah?
- Brown ones.Copy !req
719. Mr. Stafford's shoes
had brown soles and brown heels.Copy !req
720. You mean that...Copy !req
721. Gene walked over the newly waxed
gym floor?Copy !req
722. Walking on the fray wouldn't create
these particular kind of marks, sir.Copy !req
723. No, he would have to stop short
or turn abruptly...Copy !req
724. you know, something like that.Copy !req
725. As a matter of fact, I had some of the boys
from the department...Copy !req
726. come down there and try to duplicate
those exact marks.Copy !req
727. That's what they had to do.Copy !req
728. I mean...Copy !req
729. if he was chasing somebody
or somebody was chasing him...Copy !req
730. scuffle...Copy !req
731. struggle.Copy !req
732. You get my point?Copy !req
733. No, I don't, Lieutenant.
Have you had breakfast yet?Copy !req
734. - No, sir.
- Would you care to join me?Copy !req
735. Well, I don't want to put you out.Copy !req
736. No, it's no trouble, really.
Here, put your hand out.Copy !req
737. I just take these, and...Copy !req
738. Yeah, that's breakfast.Copy !req
739. That's breakfast, huh?Copy !req
740. Are you having any?Copy !req
741. Sure.Copy !req
742. - The same thing?
- Same as you.Copy !req
743. Say, there's something wrong
with this orange juice.Copy !req
744. It's carrot juice, Lieutenant.Copy !req
745. Oh.Copy !req
746. You mentioned something
about a struggle?Copy !req
747. Yes, sir, the struggle.Copy !req
748. The heel marks...Copy !req
749. Just put this down for the moment.Copy !req
750. The lab definitely established...Copy !req
751. that the heel marks belong
to Mr. Stafford's shoes.Copy !req
752. And I got to thinking, "Under what
circumstances would a man...Copy !req
753. run on a newly waxed floor
with shoes on?"Copy !req
754. After all, he's got his own sneaks
in the locker and he should know better.Copy !req
755. So you think, you know, if somebody
was chasing him...Copy !req
756. or if somebody was trying
to harm him.Copy !req
757. Trying to harm him how?Copy !req
758. Well, I don't know.Copy !req
759. Just a thought...Copy !req
760. but if somebody was chasing him
and they caught him...Copy !req
761. then whatever happened...Copy !req
762. that's when he could have
had his neck broken.Copy !req
763. It's possible.Copy !req
764. Well.Copy !req
765. Of course, the problem there
is that he had his shoes on...Copy !req
766. when the guy was chasing him...Copy !req
767. but when we found the body,
of course...Copy !req
768. he'd changed into sneakers
and gym clothes.Copy !req
769. So this is just speculation
on my part...Copy !req
770. but it is possible that if
someone did this to him...Copy !req
771. they would have changed his clothes
to make it look like an accident.Copy !req
772. Lieutenant, you have my statement...Copy !req
773. and I've already told you...Copy !req
774. when I talked to Gene,
he'd already changed into his gym clothing.Copy !req
775. Right, you did say that.Copy !req
776. Right.Copy !req
777. Well, thank you, sir.
Thank you very much for your time.Copy !req
778. - I appreciate everything you've done.
- Pleasure, Lieutenant. Lieutenant, your pills.Copy !req
779. Yeah, I'll save these for lunch.
Thank you very much.Copy !req
780. Remember, fresh air, exercise...Copy !req
781. Yeah, and diet, I remember.Copy !req
782. Right, good diet. Excuse me.Copy !req
783. Hello?Copy !req
784. Oh, hi, Buddy.Copy !req
785. Listen, can I get back to you
in a little while?Copy !req
786. I have somebody here with me.Copy !req
787. I'll meet you in the office
sometime after 10:00.Copy !req
788. Good.Copy !req
789. You got a light out.Copy !req
790. What?Copy !req
791. I said, you got a light out.Copy !req
792. When a call comes in,
isn't the button supposed to light up?Copy !req
793. Oh, I hadn't noticed.Copy !req
794. Thanks. I'll call someone
and have them fix it.Copy !req
795. Thank you again.Copy !req
796. Excuse me, no smoking.Copy !req
797. Oh, this is not lit.Copy !req
798. In the ashtray, please.Copy !req
799. Is it all right if I just hold it?Copy !req
800. Company policy,
no smoking on the premises.Copy !req
801. Full name. Last name first,
first name last.Copy !req
802. Fill out boxes
"A," "B," "C" and "D."Copy !req
803. - "E" and "F" are for company policy.
- Ma'am?Copy !req
804. And you can step over to the table
when you're finished.Copy !req
805. Ma'am.Copy !req
806. You'll find all the pens
you want on the table.Copy !req
807. I'm a police officer.Copy !req
808. Why didn't you say so?Copy !req
809. Applications for security position
are in room 502.Copy !req
810. Right down the hall.Copy !req
811. I'm not here for a job, ma'am.
I'm on official business.Copy !req
812. I want some information.
Lieutenant Columbo is my name.Copy !req
813. I'm trying to locate a Mr. Lacey.Copy !req
814. A Mr. Lewis Lacey.
I understand that he's employed here.Copy !req
815. Lacey?Copy !req
816. Is that L-a-c-e-y?Copy !req
817. I think so.Copy !req
818. And Lewis. With and an "E"
or with an "O"?Copy !req
819. Not sure.Copy !req
820. What department?Copy !req
821. I don't know.Copy !req
822. I'll be with you in one moment.Copy !req
823. Ma'am?Copy !req
824. Excuse me.Copy !req
825. I'm a little pressed for time,
so when you get done with that machine...Copy !req
826. I'd appreciate it if you took care
of my request.Copy !req
827. Our EDS is preparing you
a hardcover copy to your coded request.Copy !req
828. Oh, that is my request?Copy !req
829. Yes, sir.Copy !req
830. Oh!Copy !req
831. Just want to know where he works.Copy !req
832. You'll have all the information you need
in one moment.Copy !req
833. Anything you want?Copy !req
834. Are you sure you put
the right thing in? I mean...Copy !req
835. Well, we seem to be getting
an awful lot of information there.Copy !req
836. That's why I asked.Copy !req
837. You think we could just do it
on the phone?Copy !req
838. Oh, I'm sorry, sir. A phone call
would be much too complicated.Copy !req
839. You sure that's not stuck?Copy !req
840. No, sir. It's not quite finished.Copy !req
841. What was this Mr. Lacey?
Was he the president here?Copy !req
842. No, he must have been
very important because...Copy !req
843. Forget it.Copy !req
844. I think it's over.Copy !req
845. Thank you.Copy !req
846. Lacey, Lewis.Copy !req
847. He's a GH-84.Copy !req
848. A what, ma'am?Copy !req
849. He's been terminated.Copy !req
850. You mean he doesn't
work here anymore?Copy !req
851. That's what I said.Copy !req
852. Well, do you have a home phone,
or a home address... Something like that?Copy !req
853. Sir, the Tricon Delta 214
is a total spectrum retrieval system.Copy !req
854. You'll find all the information you need
right there.Copy !req
855. Oh, thank you very much.Copy !req
856. You're quite welcome.Copy !req
857. Tricon is always happy to cooperate
with the authorities.Copy !req
858. Yes, I can see that.Copy !req
859. Excuse me, ma'am, is there a phone here
that I might use?Copy !req
860. Yes, sir.
Right over to your right.Copy !req
861. Thank you very much.Copy !req
862. Hello, this is Lewis Lacey.Copy !req
863. Yeah, Mr. Lacey, this is Lieutenant Columbo,
and the reason I'm calling...Copy !req
864. I'm away from my desk now,
but expect to be back shortly.Copy !req
865. Please leave your name and number...Copy !req
866. and I will return your call
as soon as possible.Copy !req
867. You may start talking
when you hear the tone.Copy !req
868. This is Lieutenant Columbo.Copy !req
869. I am from the homicide department
of the police.Copy !req
870. I would like to speak to you
as soon as possible.Copy !req
871. You can reach me
at the main precinct.Copy !req
872. The telephone number there is...Copy !req
873. You can look that up.Copy !req
874. I am usually there
in the mornings.Copy !req
875. Thank you very much.Copy !req
876. Mrs. Stafford?Copy !req
877. Yes, I'm Ruth Stafford.Copy !req
878. Lewis Lacey, Mrs. Stafford.Copy !req
879. I'm not sure you remember me.
We met at a Tricon party some years back.Copy !req
880. Sure, I do. Sure. Come on in.Copy !req
881. I feel so awful about Gene.Copy !req
882. He's been very good to me,
giving me this work to do...Copy !req
883. ever since Tricon terminated me.Copy !req
884. My profound sympathies.Copy !req
885. Thank you. Come on in. Sit down.Copy !req
886. - Can I get you a drink?
- No.Copy !req
887. - No, thank you.
- Well, how about some wine?Copy !req
888. - No.
- Are you sure? I'm having some.Copy !req
889. Mrs. Stafford, I'm afraid I don't know
quite what to do.Copy !req
890. Do about what?Copy !req
891. Well, Gene paid me several hundred dollars
to do some research for him...Copy !req
892. and I haven't been able to get very far.Copy !req
893. And what kind of research?Copy !req
894. Well, my field is corporate law...Copy !req
895. and I've been doing some checking
on a Mr. Janus.Copy !req
896. Milo Janus.Copy !req
897. - Oh. Will you have some?
- No.Copy !req
898. What kind of checking
you been doing?Copy !req
899. Well, I was following the
corporate trail, so to speak.Copy !req
900. I was working on tax records,
corporation charters...Copy !req
901. to find what business interests
Mr. Janus has.Copy !req
902. Financial worth of companies,
that sort of thing.Copy !req
903. Gene hired you to find out
if Milo's a thief, right?Copy !req
904. Yes, that was his intention,
I believe.Copy !req
905. Well?Copy !req
906. Is he?Copy !req
907. I don't know.Copy !req
908. Mr. Janus is
a very shrewd businessman...Copy !req
909. but everything I've found
seems totally proper.Copy !req
910. In a legal sense, of course.Copy !req
911. Mr. Stafford promised me
some further names to run down.Copy !req
912. A couple of overseas companies
where Mr. Janus has been funneling money...Copy !req
913. apparently without notifying
the Internal Revenue Service.Copy !req
914. I don't suppose
he mentioned the names to you.Copy !req
915. - No, he didn't.
- Oh.Copy !req
916. I really don't know what to do.Copy !req
917. I can't go any further without them.Copy !req
918. I mean, I'm not even sure
you'd want me to continue.Copy !req
919. I don't really feel
as if I've earned the money.Copy !req
920. No, don't think about it.
Don't worry about that.Copy !req
921. These are my notes.
You should have them.Copy !req
922. Thank you. I'll look at them.
Thank you.Copy !req
923. I liked your husband
very much, Mrs. Stafford.Copy !req
924. I'm terribly sorry.Copy !req
925. Thank you. So am I.Copy !req
926. Thanks for coming by.Copy !req
927. - Bye.
- Bye-bye.Copy !req
928. Mr. Castle?Copy !req
929. Trying to talk to you
for a couple of days.Copy !req
930. Lieutenant Columbo.Copy !req
931. You want to talk
to me, Lieutenant?Copy !req
932. I'm investigating
the death of Mr. Stafford.Copy !req
933. Well, I can't tell you anything.
I wasn't there.Copy !req
934. The custodian...Copy !req
935. Do you have a pencil?Copy !req
936. No, I don't.Copy !req
937. The custodian, Murphy...Copy !req
938. he says he left the building
at 7:00.Copy !req
939. Did he?Copy !req
940. You got to Mr. Janus',
at what time was that, sir?Copy !req
941. 8:30, 9:00. Something like that.Copy !req
942. Would you mind telling me
where you were between...Copy !req
943. 7:00 and the time you arrived
at Mr. Janus' house?Copy !req
944. 7:00, I was home getting dressed.Copy !req
945. I left about 7:30.Copy !req
946. I picked up Miss Frieda Berk...Copy !req
947. and we went directly
from her place to Milo's.Copy !req
948. B-e-r-k?Copy !req
949. Yeah, it's German.Copy !req
950. Frieda Berk.Copy !req
951. What is this all about, Lieutenant?
Gene Stafford died accidentally.Copy !req
952. You make it seem
as if he were murdered.Copy !req
953. I didn't say that.Copy !req
954. Well, it's either that or you like
to waste people's time...Copy !req
955. by asking a lot
of foolish questions.Copy !req
956. I have an appointment in seven minutes.
So may I please be excused?Copy !req
957. One thing, sir.Copy !req
958. You a stockholder
in Mr. Janus' enterprise?Copy !req
959. A minor one.Copy !req
960. I was trying to find out
a little bit more about the business.Copy !req
961. I spoke to a Mr. Lacey.Copy !req
962. Who?Copy !req
963. L-a-c-e-y.Copy !req
964. I finally talked to him this morning.Copy !req
965. I don't know any Lacey.Copy !req
966. Look, if you want to know something
about the business...Copy !req
967. you talk to Milo.
He handles everything himself.Copy !req
968. Now, will you excuse me?Copy !req
969. - Excuse me.
- Yes?Copy !req
970. Oh, Lieutenant...Copy !req
971. Columbo.Copy !req
972. We met a couple of days ago
at Mr. Janus' house.Copy !req
973. I remember, Lieutenant.Copy !req
974. I was wondering,
do you think that I could...Copy !req
975. Excuse me.Copy !req
976. Mr. Janus' office.Copy !req
977. No, I'm sorry,
he's not here right now.Copy !req
978. He's at our Chatsworth spa
for the next week or two.Copy !req
979. Yes, that's right.Copy !req
980. Sure, you can call him there.
Thank you.Copy !req
981. Well, you just answered my question.Copy !req
982. What's that, Lieutenant?Copy !req
983. No, I was wondering whether
I could see Mr. Janus...Copy !req
984. but I heard you say that he's up
at the Chatsworth spa.Copy !req
985. Yes, until we find somebody else.Copy !req
986. You know, that's very interesting.Copy !req
987. What do you do,
you record all calls on that?Copy !req
988. Mr. Janus seems to think
it's a good precaution.Copy !req
989. You get some pretty strange people
with some pretty strange ideas.Copy !req
990. Oh, you mean lawsuits.Copy !req
991. We've had our share.Copy !req
992. So this way you protect yourself.
You record all calls.Copy !req
993. Along with a log. Yes.Copy !req
994. Can't be too careful. Very smart.Copy !req
995. Excuse me.Copy !req
996. Mr. Janus' office.Copy !req
997. Oh, yes, Mrs. Stafford.
I'm sorry, he's not here right now.Copy !req
998. He's at our Chatsworth spa.
He'll be there for a week or two.Copy !req
999. Perhaps you'd like
to call him there.Copy !req
1000. 555-9214.Copy !req
1001. Mrs. Stafford?Copy !req
1002. Well, this is fascinating. You don't
suppose I could hear how this works?Copy !req
1003. Certainly, Lieutenant.Copy !req
1004. Mr. Janus' office.Copy !req
1005. This is Ruth Stafford.
I want to speak to Mr. Janus.Copy !req
1006. Oh, yes, Mrs. Stafford.
I'm sorry, he's not here right now.Copy !req
1007. What do you mean, "not there"?
Where is he?Copy !req
1008. He's at our Chatsworth spa.Copy !req
1009. He'll be there for a week or two.Copy !req
1010. Why wasn't I told?
Who gave him that right?Copy !req
1011. Perhaps you'd like
to call him there.Copy !req
1012. What's the number?Copy !req
1013. 555-9214.Copy !req
1014. Mrs. Stafford?Copy !req
1015. That reminds me of my sister-in-law.
Does she always sound like that?Copy !req
1016. How's that, Lieutenant?Copy !req
1017. You know, a little smashed.Copy !req
1018. Well, I wouldn't know.
I seldom speak to her.Copy !req
1019. Oh, you spoke mostly to him.Copy !req
1020. Yes, that's right.Copy !req
1021. Then I suppose you have a
lot of recordings with his voice.Copy !req
1022. Yes, Lieutenant.Copy !req
1023. I think I'll run over
to the Chatsworth spa.Copy !req
1024. Oh, one more thing.Copy !req
1025. The night that Mr. Stafford died...Copy !req
1026. you went over to Mr. Janus' house.
What time was that?Copy !req
1027. Around 8:15.Copy !req
1028. And...Copy !req
1029. Mr. Janus wasn't there
at that time, is that right?Copy !req
1030. Yes, that's right.
He had to go see a prospective buyer.Copy !req
1031. He didn't get back to the house
until a little after 9:00.Copy !req
1032. And that's when Mr. Stafford called?Copy !req
1033. More or less. Mr. Janus came home...Copy !req
1034. and then he went into the study
to start the film projector.Copy !req
1035. Oh.Copy !req
1036. That's when Mr. Stafford called.Copy !req
1037. Yes.Copy !req
1038. May I borrow a pencil?Copy !req
1039. Sure.Copy !req
1040. Are you certain it was Mr. Stafford
that was on the line?Copy !req
1041. Yes.Copy !req
1042. You're sure?Copy !req
1043. I recognized his voice, Lieutenant.Copy !req
1044. What did he say?Copy !req
1045. "Hello, Jessica,
this is Gene Stafford."Copy !req
1046. What was his attitude?
How did he sound?Copy !req
1047. Businesslike, as usual.Copy !req
1048. Then I take it it's not unusual...Copy !req
1049. for you to be in Mr. Janus' house
in the evening.Copy !req
1050. Yes, Lieutenant.Copy !req
1051. As a matter of fact, that was
the first time I was ever there.Copy !req
1052. What are you driving at?Copy !req
1053. Nothing to do with you, ma'am.Copy !req
1054. No, I was just wondering...Copy !req
1055. if Mr. Stafford was used to having you
answer the phone in the office...Copy !req
1056. why wasn't he surprised when
you answered the phone in the house?Copy !req
1057. May I keep this?Copy !req
1058. Sure.Copy !req
1059. Now, Mr. Janus, he's got
two telephone lines into his house.Copy !req
1060. 6901 and 6902.Copy !req
1061. That's right.Copy !req
1062. Do you remember which line
the call came in on?Copy !req
1063. No, I'm sorry.Copy !req
1064. Oh...Copy !req
1065. do you remember
when the call came in...Copy !req
1066. did the light under the button light up?Copy !req
1067. Yes.Copy !req
1068. As a matter of fact, Lieutenant,
it was the second line, 6902.Copy !req
1069. Thank you very much, ma'am.
You've been very helpful.Copy !req
1070. - Good evening.
- Good evening.Copy !req
1071. - Chianti for the gentleman?
- Thank you.Copy !req
1072. Would you like some wine?Copy !req
1073. Sure?Copy !req
1074. No, I want to keep a clear head.Copy !req
1075. Thank you.Copy !req
1076. You know, stress isn't good
for you, Ruth.Copy !req
1077. Why don't you relax
and try and enjoy yourself?Copy !req
1078. I know you still love him.Copy !req
1079. I never tried to hide that.Copy !req
1080. He was a wonderful guy.Copy !req
1081. You know, much more than
just a business associate.Copy !req
1082. Oh, come on, Milo, cut it out.Copy !req
1083. Don't pretend with me.
I know what you're doing.Copy !req
1084. Doing? I don't understand.Copy !req
1085. You're moving in on the spa already.
You're taking it over.Copy !req
1086. That's just temporary until
I can find a buyer for you, Ruth.Copy !req
1087. Suppose I don't want a buyer.
Suppose I want to run the business myself.Copy !req
1088. Well, you don't have any experience.Copy !req
1089. I could learn.
I could get a good accountant...Copy !req
1090. someone who understood the books.Copy !req
1091. But you might not approve of that.Copy !req
1092. That's what Gene was doing.
Before he died.Copy !req
1093. He was working on the books.
But you knew that, didn't you?Copy !req
1094. No, I didn't.Copy !req
1095. Milo, let me ask you something.Copy !req
1096. Let me ask you something
about the M.J. Manufacturers.Copy !req
1097. That broken-down pill factory...Copy !req
1098. where you manufacture health food
and then sell it for six times the cost.Copy !req
1099. Now, look, Ruth...Copy !req
1100. Okay, I won't ask you about that.Copy !req
1101. I'll ask you about the Green Eagle
Manufacturers...Copy !req
1102. where you manufacture
Milo Janus gym equipment.Copy !req
1103. Damn it, Ruth,
I have to maintain quality.Copy !req
1104. Profits. Profit.Copy !req
1105. What do you do
with all that money, Milo?Copy !req
1106. Reinvest it. In the franchises.Copy !req
1107. When I grow, you grow.Copy !req
1108. I don't think so.
And Gene didn't think so.Copy !req
1109. What Gene thought...Copy !req
1110. or what Gene could have proven...Copy !req
1111. that's a different matter.Copy !req
1112. Let it be, Ruth.Copy !req
1113. You can live comfortably
for the rest of your life.Copy !req
1114. I will sell your franchise.Copy !req
1115. But if you keep making
these wild accusations...Copy !req
1116. the value of your investment's
gonna go down, Ruth, way down.Copy !req
1117. A threat?Copy !req
1118. No. Not a threat.Copy !req
1119. Just sound advice. You don't know anything
about the business world.Copy !req
1120. The real business world. And for that matter,
neither did your husband.Copy !req
1121. He lived in that ivory tower
of Pentagon bureaucrats, pushovers.Copy !req
1122. It's a lot tougher selling apples
on the street corner.Copy !req
1123. That's what I do,
and I do it successfully.Copy !req
1124. And no one's gonna spoil it, Ruth.Copy !req
1125. No one. Understand?Copy !req
1126. Have some wine.
Actually, it's very good.Copy !req
1127. Relax.Copy !req
1128. Later we'll go over to my place.Copy !req
1129. Where are you going?Copy !req
1130. Out.Copy !req
1131. Can I do something for you?Copy !req
1132. - What do you say, Buddy?
- Hi, Milo.Copy !req
1133. Hey, did you set up that appointment
with Parker? I think he's ripe now.Copy !req
1134. Yeah, I got a call and I booked
you lunch at the club.Copy !req
1135. Good.Copy !req
1136. We've got another small problem.Copy !req
1137. If it's a little problem, you handle it.Copy !req
1138. I don't think I can, not this one.Copy !req
1139. What's he doing here?Copy !req
1140. Well, you know that
introductory 30-day offer...Copy !req
1141. we've been pushing on television?Copy !req
1142. - Yeah.
- What he's doing here.Copy !req
1143. Hey, Mr. Janus, how you doing?Copy !req
1144. Listen, I gotta tell you,
this is terrific.Copy !req
1145. I'm starting to feel
like a new man already.Copy !req
1146. Fine, fine, Columbo.Copy !req
1147. Of course, you know, I've only been
on it for about 20 minutes...Copy !req
1148. but you know what it is?
It's a whole different attitude.Copy !req
1149. I mean, I believe that this is gonna
make a new man out of me.Copy !req
1150. I'm skipping beer, giving up the cigars
no more chili.Copy !req
1151. That's fine, Columbo.
You'll have to excuse me.Copy !req
1152. I've got some paperwork
I have to take care of.Copy !req
1153. Just a few more questions
that I want to ask you.Copy !req
1154. Columbo, I don't have the time.Copy !req
1155. Excuse me, sir. I gotta get back to work.Copy !req
1156. I thought I'd pop in.
It's about the barbell.Copy !req
1157. What?Copy !req
1158. The barbell, sir. I was talking to
some of the people around here.Copy !req
1159. It weighs 180 pounds.
It's a heavy thing to lift.Copy !req
1160. I understand that Mr. Stafford never
lifted anything heavier than 150 pounds.Copy !req
1161. That's right.Copy !req
1162. When he tried to lift
180 pounds, it killed him.Copy !req
1163. Yeah, it certainly did.
But you know...Copy !req
1164. I guess there's not
a lot of people around here...Copy !req
1165. Lieutenant, I don't mean to be rude
but I told you in the gym...Copy !req
1166. I'm really very busy.Copy !req
1167. I'm pressed myself,
so I'll make it fast.Copy !req
1168. Where was I?Copy !req
1169. Oh, yes.Copy !req
1170. I guess there's not
a lot of people around here...Copy !req
1171. that could press 180 pounds.Copy !req
1172. Outside of yourself, of course.Copy !req
1173. Me?Copy !req
1174. Well, I understand that you
once pressed 250 pounds.Copy !req
1175. I wanna tell you,
that's a lot of weight.Copy !req
1176. Listen, I got
a little confession to make.Copy !req
1177. You know, I tried
to lift up that barbell.Copy !req
1178. I couldn't get the damn thing
above my knees.Copy !req
1179. I mean, it shows you
the kind of shape I'm in.Copy !req
1180. Would you please
get to the point?Copy !req
1181. Oh, yes, sir.Copy !req
1182. Well, you know some of my thoughts
on this case, and...Copy !req
1183. You know, the possibility in my mind...Copy !req
1184. that maybe the barbell
didn't kill Mr. Stafford.Copy !req
1185. You know, that someone
either struck him or choked him...Copy !req
1186. or something like that.Copy !req
1187. And if that is the case,
whoever staged it...Copy !req
1188. to make it look like an accident...Copy !req
1189. he'd have to be strong enough
to lift up a 180-pound barbell...Copy !req
1190. and place it on Mr. Stafford's neck.Copy !req
1191. Are you accusing me
because I once pressed 250 pounds?Copy !req
1192. Oh, no, sir.Copy !req
1193. Oh, no, I wasn't accusing anybody.
No, let me explain.Copy !req
1194. No, what I'm trying
to do here is...Copy !req
1195. I'm trying to figure out
how many people around here...Copy !req
1196. are capable
of lifting 180 pounds.Copy !req
1197. Lieutenant, I can tell you
in the gym right now...Copy !req
1198. there are at least a dozen men...Copy !req
1199. that could lift up that bar
and put it on Gene's body...Copy !req
1200. if that's what happened.Copy !req
1201. But why don't you accept the fact
that it was an accident?Copy !req
1202. Well, it's also about the shoes.Copy !req
1203. Shoes?Copy !req
1204. Yes, sir, Mr. Stafford's
brown-heeled shoes.Copy !req
1205. Oh, yeah, you mentioned something
about a struggle.Copy !req
1206. Well, I wasn't thinking
exactly about that, sir.Copy !req
1207. No...Copy !req
1208. you see, the shoes weren't untied.Copy !req
1209. The shoelaces.
They were still tied.Copy !req
1210. And it seems funny to me that a man
would take off his shoes...Copy !req
1211. without untying the laces.Copy !req
1212. Unless, of course,
he was in a hurry.Copy !req
1213. But I don't know where he was rushing to.
He was just gonna go work out.Copy !req
1214. You see, that bothers me.Copy !req
1215. You know what bothers me,
Lieutenant?Copy !req
1216. Your constant insinuation that I know more
about Gene Stafford's death...Copy !req
1217. than I've already told you.Copy !req
1218. Is that the impression that I give?Copy !req
1219. Yes, that is the impression
that you give, Lieutenant.Copy !req
1220. I'm sorry, sir.Copy !req
1221. If you recall,
I was at home with friends...Copy !req
1222. when Gene died, remember?Copy !req
1223. Yes, sir. You certainly were.Copy !req
1224. Let me see.Copy !req
1225. You got home a little after 9:00...Copy !req
1226. and Mr. Stafford called
a few minutes after that.Copy !req
1227. That's about right.Copy !req
1228. That's what I have written down.Copy !req
1229. See? It's right there, sir.Copy !req
1230. Well, thank you very much.Copy !req
1231. There's one other thing, sir.
Your secretary...Copy !req
1232. she said she left the office
around 6:00 that night...Copy !req
1233. to go home and change and when she left,
you were still in the office.Copy !req
1234. That's right.Copy !req
1235. Would you mind telling me, sir...Copy !req
1236. I don't want to sound
like I'm accusing you...Copy !req
1237. but it's a question
I really have to ask.Copy !req
1238. Where were you in those three hours
from 6:00 until 9:00?Copy !req
1239. What difference can it make?Copy !req
1240. Oh, it probably doesn't
make any difference...Copy !req
1241. but I'm gonna tell you
what my problem is.Copy !req
1242. I got a new boss.Copy !req
1243. He's a nice man, but he's a little young
for the job.Copy !req
1244. So he's a stickler for details
and I have to be very thorough.Copy !req
1245. All right, Lieutenant,
if you must know...Copy !req
1246. I was in my downtown office
until 7:00...Copy !req
1247. and then I drove to Pasadena.Copy !req
1248. May I?Copy !req
1249. Certainly.Copy !req
1250. Is that with two "N's"?
Well, what's the difference?Copy !req
1251. I'll know what it is.Copy !req
1252. One "N," Lieutenant.Copy !req
1253. Thank you.Copy !req
1254. What were you doing
in Pasadena, sir?Copy !req
1255. I went to Parker Motors.Copy !req
1256. Mr. Parker, the owner,
was interested in talking to me...Copy !req
1257. about a Milo Janus franchise.Copy !req
1258. So I thought I'd drive out there
and discuss it with him.Copy !req
1259. How'd you make out?Copy !req
1260. I didn't.Copy !req
1261. When I got there,
the place was closed...Copy !req
1262. so I turned around and I drove home.Copy !req
1263. He wasn't there.Copy !req
1264. What time is it, sir?Copy !req
1265. Almost 11:00.Copy !req
1266. I gotta check into
the headquarters.Copy !req
1267. Thank you very much.Copy !req
1268. Thank you, sir.Copy !req
1269. Oh, Mr. Janus,
just one more thing, please.Copy !req
1270. I thought you had a clock to punch.Copy !req
1271. I do. I'm leaving right now.Copy !req
1272. It's about Mrs. Stafford.Copy !req
1273. I understand that you and she had a little
disagreement in a restaurant last night.Copy !req
1274. Have you been following me, Columbo?Copy !req
1275. No. What happened was this.Copy !req
1276. Mrs. Stafford came down
to headquarters this morning.Copy !req
1277. She spoke to some of the fellas
in the other division.Copy !req
1278. What other division?Copy !req
1279. Bunco.Copy !req
1280. - Bunco?
- Yes.Copy !req
1281. Made a lot of wild accusations...Copy !req
1282. about you, about your operation.Copy !req
1283. Now, it's clear Mrs. Stafford is a
very inexperienced businesswoman.Copy !req
1284. How's that, Lieutenant?Copy !req
1285. The way you run your business operation.Copy !req
1286. I spoke to a Mr. Lacey.Copy !req
1287. He's somewhat of an expert on business.Copy !req
1288. And I suppose he called me a crook?Copy !req
1289. No, sir, he never said that.
He said, and he repeated this...Copy !req
1290. he said technically,
you're within the law.Copy !req
1291. Of course, I can understand how Mrs.
Stafford and even Mr. Stafford...Copy !req
1292. how they could get upset
over some of the things...Copy !req
1293. that are going on around here.Copy !req
1294. That's enough, Columbo.Copy !req
1295. I'm tired of your accusations
and your innuendos.Copy !req
1296. All I'm trying to do
is determine the facts, sir.Copy !req
1297. If you have anything to say to me...Copy !req
1298. you say it through my attorney,
is that clear?Copy !req
1299. Yes, sir.Copy !req
1300. And be damn sure you know
what you're talking about.Copy !req
1301. Nurse Colburn, please.
EKG to 447.Copy !req
1302. Nurse Colburn, please.
EKG to 447.Copy !req
1303. Excuse me, Lieutenant Columbo.Copy !req
1304. I understood they brought
a Mrs. Stafford in.Copy !req
1305. Oh, yes, she's in ICU.
Dr. Freeman's with her now.Copy !req
1306. It's down the hall to your left.Copy !req
1307. Dr. Golden,
call seventh floor, please.Copy !req
1308. Dr. Golden.Copy !req
1309. Excuse me. How is she?Copy !req
1310. Well, she'll live,
but it was close.Copy !req
1311. What happened?Copy !req
1312. Booze, pills. A deadly combination.
A neighbor found her.Copy !req
1313. Lieutenant.Copy !req
1314. You're gonna be all right.Copy !req
1315. I knew he was cheating Gene.Copy !req
1316. And I told him I knew.Copy !req
1317. He just laughed at me.Copy !req
1318. All right, take it easy.Copy !req
1319. Guess I had too much to drink.Copy !req
1320. And then I couldn't sleep.Copy !req
1321. His face just kept going around and around
laughing and laughing.Copy !req
1322. I'll be in the waiting room.
You get some rest.Copy !req
1323. Dr. Dormer...Copy !req
1324. check with x-ray lab,
please. Dr. Dormer.Copy !req
1325. How is she?
They won't tell me a thing.Copy !req
1326. What do you care?Copy !req
1327. - Ma'am.
- What's that supposed to mean?Copy !req
1328. May I have that magazine?Copy !req
1329. You don't care whether she lives or dies.Copy !req
1330. As a matter of fact, she's drinking
because of you...Copy !req
1331. because she thinks you're responsible
for the death of her husband.Copy !req
1332. And you want to know
something? So do I.Copy !req
1333. I warned you in my office.
Don't you...Copy !req
1334. I checked your alibi for the time before
you got to the house. It doesn't wash.Copy !req
1335. First of all, I don't need an alibi...Copy !req
1336. and secondly, I was at Parker Motors.Copy !req
1337. You said they were closed
when you got there.Copy !req
1338. The fact is, they've been open every night
until 9:00 for the past month.Copy !req
1339. - May I have that magazine?
- Have they?Copy !req
1340. That's right.Copy !req
1341. Got a match?Copy !req
1342. Your health program didn't last
very long, did it?Copy !req
1343. Long enough.Copy !req
1344. You know something, Columbo?Copy !req
1345. You're a devious man.Copy !req
1346. That's what they tell me.Copy !req
1347. I'm gonna tell you something.
What I meant to say...Copy !req
1348. was that I drove out to Parker Motors
but when I got there, Parker's car was gone.Copy !req
1349. So I assumed that he left for the day.Copy !req
1350. And since my original statement to you
was verbal...Copy !req
1351. you must have misunderstood
what I said.Copy !req
1352. Now, if you claim otherwise,
I'm gonna deny it.Copy !req
1353. Is that clear?Copy !req
1354. That's very clear.Copy !req
1355. I don't care what you think.Copy !req
1356. I don't care what you suspect.Copy !req
1357. I don't care what visions you see
when you look at your cigar ashes...Copy !req
1358. because I'm innocent.Copy !req
1359. I have an alibi for the time
Gene Stafford died.Copy !req
1360. And you can huff and puff
on that rotten cigar until next July...Copy !req
1361. and you'll never prove otherwise.Copy !req
1362. - I wouldn't count on that.
- Columbo...Copy !req
1363. If you are smart...Copy !req
1364. I won't be seeing you again.Copy !req
1365. Stand still, Johnny.Copy !req
1366. Stop moving!Copy !req
1367. - Good morning, Mr. Janus.
- Morning, Susan.Copy !req
1368. Yes.Copy !req
1369. Milo, what are you
trying to do tome?Copy !req
1370. I just got a batch of invoices
from Green Eagle...Copy !req
1371. and I gotta tell you, pal...Copy !req
1372. you've got a lot of guts
charging prices...Copy !req
1373. Columbo, what the hell are you doing?Copy !req
1374. Oh, just a little
phone demonstration, sir...Copy !req
1375. to show how a man who's already dead
can appear to be alive.Copy !req
1376. Well, your little joke was not funny.Copy !req
1377. It wasn't meant to be funny,
sir. Oh, no.Copy !req
1378. No, you see this tape,
this is tricky stuff.Copy !req
1379. The other day,
I'm in the employment office.Copy !req
1380. I call the phone of Mr. Lewis Lacey.Copy !req
1381. Now, he gets on the phone, and he says
"Hello, this is Mr. Lacey."Copy !req
1382. Now, I get out a whole sentence
before I realize I'm not talking to him.Copy !req
1383. I'm talking to a recording.Copy !req
1384. A thing like that,
it makes an impression on you.Copy !req
1385. This tape here...Copy !req
1386. this is a tape of a conversation...Copy !req
1387. you had with Mr. Stafford
two months ago.Copy !req
1388. I clipped out a piece of it...Copy !req
1389. and I played it back on the phone.
I hope you don't mind.Copy !req
1390. But I do mind. What the hell
gives you the right, Columbo?Copy !req
1391. This, sir.Copy !req
1392. This is a warrant.Copy !req
1393. This gives me the right.Copy !req
1394. I also found the spot on the tape...Copy !req
1395. that you clipped out before.Copy !req
1396. The tape that you used
to convince your secretary...Copy !req
1397. that Mr. Stafford was alive
and working out in the gym.Copy !req
1398. It came from this reel.Copy !req
1399. But when you play
this reel back, it skips...Copy !req
1400. from the end
of the previous phone call...Copy !req
1401. to the point where your secretary
tells you...Copy !req
1402. that Mr. Stafford is on the phone...Copy !req
1403. but in between there's a splice mark.Copy !req
1404. You see it?Copy !req
1405. Now, I figure
what's been clipped out...Copy !req
1406. that's the part
where Mr. Stafford said...Copy !req
1407. "Hello, Jessica, this is Gene Stafford.
Can I speak to Mr. Janus?"Copy !req
1408. Something like that.Copy !req
1409. You see how easy it is
to fool people.Copy !req
1410. Columbo...Copy !req
1411. you've got some imagination.Copy !req
1412. Even if someone did clip out
a section of that tape...Copy !req
1413. it could have been anyone
that knew about those files.Copy !req
1414. But it wasn't anyone, sir.Copy !req
1415. You carried on a lengthy conversation
on the phone with him didn't you?Copy !req
1416. I'll tell you how you did it,
if you're interested.Copy !req
1417. Go ahead, it's your fairy tale.Copy !req
1418. When you came home, sir,
after you murdered Mr. Stafford...Copy !req
1419. you went into your study...Copy !req
1420. and you pushed down line 6901.Copy !req
1421. Then you dialed 6902...Copy !req
1422. knowing that your secretary
in the living room would answer the phone.Copy !req
1423. She picks up the phone.Copy !req
1424. Naturally, she recognizes
Mr. Stafford's voice.Copy !req
1425. Now you come out of the study,
you take the phone...Copy !req
1426. and you stage
this imaginary conversation.Copy !req
1427. Even to the point
of planting the idea...Copy !req
1428. that he was working out
with exercise equipment.Copy !req
1429. Did I?Copy !req
1430. Yes, sir, you did.Copy !req
1431. And you did something else,
and this was smart.Copy !req
1432. And I give you credit for this.Copy !req
1433. You removed the bulb on the phone
in the living room...Copy !req
1434. so that the line wouldn't light up.Copy !req
1435. Because if 6901 lit up...Copy !req
1436. the people there would know that you
were talking from the phone in the study.Copy !req
1437. Guess work. Supposition.
More cigar ashes.Copy !req
1438. What you need, Lieutenant, is proof.
That's what you need, proof.Copy !req
1439. It didn't take me till July...Copy !req
1440. but I got the proof.Copy !req
1441. Right here.Copy !req
1442. Your sworn statement...Copy !req
1443. regarding the telephone conversation
that you claim you had with Mr. Stafford.Copy !req
1444. But I did talk to him.
I talked to him.Copy !req
1445. - And he was at the health club?
- Yes.Copy !req
1446. And he was working out
with the barbell?Copy !req
1447. He said he was about to work out.Copy !req
1448. Here's your quote.Copy !req
1449. "He already changed
into his gym clothes.Copy !req
1450. He said he was going to work out
for about a half an hour...Copy !req
1451. and then go home."Copy !req
1452. - Is that what he said?
- Yes.Copy !req
1453. Are you sure?Copy !req
1454. Yes, damn it. That's what I said.Copy !req
1455. That's impossible, Mr. Janus.Copy !req
1456. Oh, that's just not possible.Copy !req
1457. Lieutenant,
that's a very expensive desk.Copy !req
1458. Oh, excuse me.
If you'd just bear with me for a moment.Copy !req
1459. Because this is very interesting.Copy !req
1460. Watch this carefully.Copy !req
1461. I tie my shoes
like most right-handed people.Copy !req
1462. I make my first loop...Copy !req
1463. and you'll notice
that the loop is over my arch.Copy !req
1464. It's on the same side as my big toe.Copy !req
1465. Is that true?Copy !req
1466. That's right.Copy !req
1467. Just bear with me, sir.Copy !req
1468. Oh, that's my lunch.
That doesn't mean nothing.Copy !req
1469. Here we are.
This is an old sneaker of mine.Copy !req
1470. Now I turn that sneaker around...Copy !req
1471. just like I was gonna
tie somebody else's shoe.Copy !req
1472. I do the laces the same way
and I make my first loop.Copy !req
1473. You'll notice that the loop...Copy !req
1474. is now on the opposite side.
It's on the side of the little toe.Copy !req
1475. Here, it was on the side
of the big toe.Copy !req
1476. This is the exact reversal of this.Copy !req
1477. Is that true?Copy !req
1478. Yes, Lieutenant, that's true.Copy !req
1479. You see, I knew there was something about
these shoelaces that was bothering me.Copy !req
1480. I just couldn't put my finger on it.Copy !req
1481. Oh, yes.Copy !req
1482. Look at this photograph.Copy !req
1483. This is a picture
of Mr. Stafford's sneakers.Copy !req
1484. It was taken
when the body was discovered.Copy !req
1485. You'll notice that the first loop
which you can always identify...Copy !req
1486. it's the top loop...Copy !req
1487. the first loop is on the side
of the little toe.Copy !req
1488. Now look at this shoe.Copy !req
1489. This is Mr. Stafford's shoe.
I found it in his locker.Copy !req
1490. Now, this is the interesting point.Copy !req
1491. When I tie my own lace...Copy !req
1492. the first loop
is on the side of the big toe.Copy !req
1493. When Mr. Stafford
ties his own laces...Copy !req
1494. the first loop
is on the side of the big toe.Copy !req
1495. This matches with this.Copy !req
1496. However...Copy !req
1497. when I tie somebody else's shoe...Copy !req
1498. the first loop is on the side
of the little toe.Copy !req
1499. And this matches with this.Copy !req
1500. There's only one conclusion.Copy !req
1501. Mr. Stafford did not
put on his own sneakers.Copy !req
1502. Somebody else did.Copy !req
1503. And that somebody was you.Copy !req
1504. You changed his clothes.Copy !req
1505. Now, you wait a minute, Lieutenant.
I'll tell you something.Copy !req
1506. Your little demonstration
proves one thing and one thing only.Copy !req
1507. That somebody else
put on Stafford's gym shoes...Copy !req
1508. but the fact remains
you can't prove that I did it.Copy !req
1509. It could have been anybody.Copy !req
1510. It could only be you.Copy !req
1511. By your own admission,
it had to be you.Copy !req
1512. Mr. Stafford was last seen around 7:30
wearing his business clothes.Copy !req
1513. Now, he's alone in the building...Copy !req
1514. the building is locked and
the next morning, he's found dead...Copy !req
1515. in his gym clothes!Copy !req
1516. And at 9:00 the previous evening...Copy !req
1517. nine hours before the body was found...Copy !req
1518. you and you alone...Copy !req
1519. knew that he was
in his gym clothes.Copy !req
1520. You said so.Copy !req
1521. You swore to it
in front of five witnesses.Copy !req
1522. How did you know
he was in his gym clothes...Copy !req
1523. if you didn't change the clothes?Copy !req
1524. You tried to contrive
the perfect alibi, sir.Copy !req
1525. And it's your perfect alibi
that's gonna hang you.Copy !req