1. behind every bombing
in the world.
Copy !req
2. Bombs away, Eddie Kane.
Copy !req
3. Find the evidence,
Lieutenant.
Copy !req
4. Quit jumping to conclusions
and quit trying
to take the easy way.
Copy !req
5. Sex is our only mysticism
in this world today.
Copy !req
6. I think someone's tryin'
to pin this murder
on Mr. Greenleaf.
Copy !req
7. Now, look, I've got
people coming over
to my house tonight.
Copy !req
8. Just exactly
what is your problem?
Copy !req
9. This chili's good,
I'll tell you that.
Copy !req
10. Bravo, Eddie.
Very efficient.
Copy !req
11. And may I add that you are
Copy !req
12. truly a living tribute
to American ingenuity.
Copy !req
13. A bit depressing for the rats,
Copy !req
14. but what's one less rat
in the world, eh, Eddie?
Copy !req
15. Get on with it.
Copy !req
16. Yes, of course.
Copy !req
17. First of all,
let me impress upon you
Copy !req
18. that the timing is everything.
Everything.
Copy !req
19. 2230.
Copy !req
20. What?
Copy !req
21. 2230 hours. Army time.
Copy !req
22. Makes it 10:30 at night
instead of in the morning.
Copy !req
23. Oh, yes, of course.
2230 hours.
Copy !req
24. Wanna synchronize watches?
Copy !req
25. No, no,
that won't be necessary.
Copy !req
26. Everything all right with you,
Eddie?
Copy !req
27. Yeah.
Copy !req
28. I just wondered.
I thought perhaps
Copy !req
29. you might be
losing your nerve.
Copy !req
30. One guy?
Copy !req
31. I fragged a couple of hundred
in Nam.
Copy !req
32. Eddie.
Copy !req
33. One shot in the heart.
No more.
Copy !req
34. Economy, huh?
Copy !req
35. Yes.
Copy !req
36. Here's the gun.
Copy !req
37. Now, remember,
Copy !req
38. you have to shoot it
without smudging the prints
Copy !req
39. on that handle.
Copy !req
40. And the key.
Copy !req
41. You've got
the rubber gloves?
Copy !req
42. Well, then.
Everything is all clear.
Copy !req
43. Yeah.
Copy !req
44. What about you
publishin' my book?
Copy !req
45. Yes, of course.
I was just coming to that.
Copy !req
46. Well, your first advance,
Eddie.
Copy !req
47. $1,000.
Copy !req
48. We'll draw up
a formal contract
Copy !req
49. in a couple of days.
Copy !req
50. No kiddin'?
Copy !req
51. That's great.
Copy !req
52. You're smart, Mr. Greenleaf.
Copy !req
53. You're gonna make a fortune
out of my book.
Copy !req
54. Three years I've been
working on it.
Copy !req
55. Three years.
Copy !req
56. I've described every single
kind of explosive there is,
Copy !req
57. and how to make it.
Copy !req
58. Well, that's your genius,
Eddie.
Copy !req
59. Your sort of
do-it-yourself book
Copy !req
60. will undoubtedly
change the world.
Copy !req
61. Yes. Yes, that's right.
Copy !req
62. Those poor kids,
those amateurs,
Copy !req
63. plantin' bombs and
blowin' themselves up.
Copy !req
64. They're really going to learn
how to do it right from me.
Copy !req
65. Believe me, I know.
Copy !req
66. I'm sure you do.
Copy !req
67. You're doin' a great thing,
Mr. Greenleaf.
Copy !req
68. We both are, Eddie.
Copy !req
69. Remember,
Copy !req
70. you have to come through
for me tonight.
Copy !req
71. Oh, that. He's dead already.
Copy !req
72. Eileen.
Copy !req
73. Eileen, you look gorgeous.
Give me a kiss.
Copy !req
74. I take every opportunity,
you know.
Copy !req
75. Hellos and goodbyes
are the only kisses I get.
Copy !req
76. Well, have you met
all the great,
Copy !req
77. and near-great, and so on
and so on?
Copy !req
78. I sure have.
Copy !req
79. It's a fine bunch of people
you have here, too.
Copy !req
80. This party is
partly for you, you know.
Copy !req
81. To impress you enough
to come and join
Copy !req
82. the Neal Publishing house.
Copy !req
83. Mr. Neal, I don't need
impressing. I'm ready.
Copy !req
84. We told Riley Greenleaf
today.
Copy !req
85. Allen's contract is up
in three weeks,
Copy !req
86. and then we're free.
Copy !req
87. And I assume Riley
took it with good grace.
Copy !req
88. Oh, of course,
aside from apoplexy.
Copy !req
89. Would you want to
lose the author
of five bestsellers?
Copy !req
90. Oh, hardly, hardly. Miss,
will you take this, please?
Copy !req
91. Listen, I hope you can join
me for dinner tonight.
You and Eileen, both.
Copy !req
92. I'm sorry, I can't.
Copy !req
93. Perhaps just you?
Copy !req
94. Oh, thanks.
Copy !req
95. Uh-oh. Has somebody arrived?
Copy !req
96. I invited Norman Mailer.
Copy !req
97. Yes, but did you
invite him?
Copy !req
98. Oh, there you are.
Copy !req
99. Don't move.
Copy !req
100. Not that I know of.
Copy !req
101. He looks a little
tanked up.
Copy !req
102. You better ignore him.
Copy !req
103. Ignore a tarantula?
Copy !req
104. You're lovely. Leave.
Copy !req
105. Well, there they are.
The Holy Trinity.
Copy !req
106. The only thing missing
is the golden glow.
Copy !req
107. Fortunately, my presence
shall make up for that.
Copy !req
108. Nice of you
to drop in, Riley.
Copy !req
109. My pleasure. My pleasure.
Copy !req
110. I was curious to see
what mysterious lures
Copy !req
111. the great Geoffrey Neal
was using to steal
Copy !req
112. my pocket-sized Hemingway.
Copy !req
113. Riley, please.
Copy !req
114. Oh, there she is,
the lovely handmaiden.
Copy !req
115. Literary agent and concubine,
Copy !req
116. ever present
at her master's side,
Copy !req
117. an inspiring muse
with real flesh.
Copy !req
118. All right, cut it out.
Don't you understand?
Copy !req
119. I don't want
a contract with you anymore.
Copy !req
120. After four years
of grinding out
some of that garbage you—
Copy !req
121. Garbage? Oh, no, no, sir,
that was sex.
Copy !req
122. And sex is our only mysticism
Copy !req
123. in this world today of
the new illiterates—
Copy !req
124. Our old contract is up
in three weeks,
Copy !req
125. and that's it, Riley.
Copy !req
126. Your relationship
does seem terminal, Riley.
Copy !req
127. He was writing obituaries
Copy !req
128. for the Pasadena News
when I found him,
Copy !req
129. and I alone made
him into a bestseller.
Copy !req
130. And now he would like to
write better things...
Copy !req
131. and for Mr. Neal's company.
Copy !req
132. Oh, you're kidding.
Copy !req
133. My dear friend,
if you do, you will die.
Copy !req
134. I'm sorry Riley,
but I think it's best
Copy !req
135. if you keep
your next appointment.
Copy !req
136. His new book belongs to me,
Copy !req
137. and I've got him
under contract.
Copy !req
138. All right.
That'll be enough for now.
Copy !req
139. Well,
I'll tell you one thing.
Copy !req
140. He'll never write for you
Copy !req
141. or anyone else,
and I shall see to it.
Copy !req
142. Good night,
you charming people.
Copy !req
143. Hey.
Copy !req
144. Hey, bartender!
Copy !req
145. If you don't mind,
a little less conversation,
Copy !req
146. a little more service
at the end of this bar.
Copy !req
147. Thank you.
Copy !req
148. What did you
put in this glass?
Copy !req
149. That's a double Scotch
and soda, sir.
Copy !req
150. Just what you ordered.
Copy !req
151. What do you take me for,
some kind of a fool?
Copy !req
152. This tastes like bile.
Copy !req
153. Hey! Hey!
Copy !req
154. Come on. Let go of me.
Copy !req
155. I think you've had
enough for tonight, sir.
Copy !req
156. Oh, really?
I'll be the judge of that.
Copy !req
157. Let go of me.
Copy !req
158. Here.
Copy !req
159. Buy yourself a personality.
Copy !req
160. Let go.
Stop manhandling me.
Copy !req
161. Stinking joint!
Copy !req
162. You and this place
deserve to be in the Valley.
Copy !req
163. Good morning, Agnes.
Copy !req
164. Yesterday's pages
looked okay.
Copy !req
165. I found a few errors
you can fix up here.
Copy !req
166. Let's pick it up
from Page 479,
Copy !req
167. and that should wrap it up
for the first draft.
Copy !req
168. Conrad held Li Chen
close against him
Copy !req
169. feeling her soft trembling
body yield to his embrace.
Copy !req
170. He knew that this
must be love.
Copy !req
171. If it wasn't,
Copy !req
172. it would have to do
until the war was over.
Copy !req
173. Conrad prowled the room
Copy !req
174. looking for the inside
of his personal tunnel.
Copy !req
175. There was no sleep
for him that night.
Copy !req
176. It was only 60 miles
to Saigon, he thought.
Copy !req
177. But how far could he ever
put Saigon behind him?
Copy !req
178. But there was only one
real decision to be reached,
Copy !req
179. and it had been formed
a long time ago.
Copy !req
180. He knew which way
he would have to turn.
Copy !req
181. Out across the plains was
the monastery of St. Ignatius,
Copy !req
182. offering him hope
and a chance to wash away
Copy !req
183. the wounds of war
that had brutalized him.
Copy !req
184. He turned to
look at Li Chen
Copy !req
185. sleeping on
the straw mattress,
Copy !req
186. her tiny body
heaving fitfully.
Copy !req
187. He would not wake her.
Copy !req
188. It was better that
she find him gone.
Copy !req
189. Saigon and
the fighting was far away.
Copy !req
190. From the window...
Copy !req
191. What's the matter with you?
Hey, fool!
Copy !req
192. Look what you've
done to my car.
Copy !req
193. Oh, I'm so sorry.
I didn't see you.
Copy !req
194. What we've done
to your car?
Copy !req
195. Look what you've done
to our car. Tell him, Ralph.
Copy !req
196. Well, sir, you—you—you
did pull out without looking.
Copy !req
197. What?
Copy !req
198. That's ridiculous.
You, Ralphy, are a fool,
Copy !req
199. you're a liar,
Copy !req
200. and you're a menace
to your fellow man.
Copy !req
201. Don't take that
from him, Ralph.
Copy !req
202. And you, madam, shut up!
Copy !req
203. All right, here, Ralphy.
Copy !req
204. I suggest you
call that number
Copy !req
205. the first thing
in the morning.
Copy !req
206. That's my insurance agent.
Copy !req
207. He'll know how to
deal with you.
Copy !req
208. Sir, in your condition,
I should call the police.
Copy !req
209. Madam, in your condition,
I'd call a plastic surgeon.
Copy !req
210. Let's see,
it would have to be around...
Copy !req
211. I come to work at 10:00,
Copy !req
212. so that would have to
make it around midnight,
Copy !req
213. I guess. Yeah.
Copy !req
214. Excuse me, coming through.
Copy !req
215. Yeah.
Copy !req
216. Yeah. About— About
midnight. I— I— I was...
Copy !req
217. That's when I found him.
Copy !req
218. I was bringing him
his coffee.
Copy !req
219. Coffee?
Did you leave the building?
Copy !req
220. Oh, no, I keep it
down in the basement.
Copy !req
221. Hey,
did somebody mention coffee?
Copy !req
222. Yeah, I brought
Mr. Mallory's coffee.
Copy !req
223. I always brought him
his coffee, every night.
Copy !req
224. Yeah? You still got some?
Copy !req
225. Yeah, it's in the other room.
But it's probably cold by now.
Copy !req
226. That's all right.
I'd drink anything.
Copy !req
227. You know how much
sleep I've had
Copy !req
228. the last two nights?
Maybe five hours.
Copy !req
229. Last night it was
Bette Davis.
Copy !req
230. 2:00 in the morning,
Copy !req
231. my wife wants to
watch Bette Davis.
Copy !req
232. So we're
watching Bette Davis.
Copy !req
233. Did you find out about
that key yet, Lieutenant?
Copy !req
234. Oh, this is brutal.
Copy !req
235. Um, the key?
Copy !req
236. Yeah.
Copy !req
237. Oh, no, the super,
he comes in at 7:00.
Copy !req
238. All right.
Copy !req
239. But, you know,
she is a terrific actress,
Copy !req
240. this woman Bette Davis.
Forget about it.
Copy !req
241. Um, excuse me.
Copy !req
242. Uh, Kramer?
Copy !req
243. Watch it. Coming through.
Copy !req
244. You finished up over here?
Copy !req
245. Just about, Lieutenant.
Just about.
Copy !req
246. How did he get in?
Copy !req
247. Who?
Copy !req
248. The guard.
Copy !req
249. How'd you get in, sir?
With a pass key?
Copy !req
250. Yeah, yeah. I knocked,
Copy !req
251. but I couldn't hear
anybody workin', you see?
Copy !req
252. But I could see the light
shining through the door.
Copy !req
253. That's when I come in,
and I— and I found him.
Copy !req
254. Did you touch anything here?
Copy !req
255. You think I'm
some kind of a nut?
Copy !req
256. That's your job.
I've got problems of my own.
Copy !req
257. Lieutenant,
this gentleman said
Copy !req
258. he came here
to see Mr. Mallory.
Copy !req
259. What's going on in here?
Copy !req
260. Who are you, sir?
Copy !req
261. Norman Wolpert.
Lewis Manuscript Service.
Copy !req
262. I'm here to pick up
Mr. Mallory's tape
Copy !req
263. for transcription.
Copy !req
264. Messenger service?
Copy !req
265. Manuscript service.
Copy !req
266. What are you doing here
at this hour?
Copy !req
267. Why do you come so late?
Copy !req
268. It's the same time
I come every night.
Copy !req
269. Yeah— Yeah, that—
that's right, Lieutenant.
I— I can vouch for that.
Copy !req
270. Is Mr. Mallory all right?
Copy !req
271. Well, I'm afraid
Mr. Mallory is dead.
Copy !req
272. What happened?
Copy !req
273. That's what we're
trying to find out.
Copy !req
274. Lou, you take this
young man's statement.
Copy !req
275. You talk to this gentleman,
and then you can go home.
Copy !req
276. It's all yours, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
277. Sweeney,
you getting anything here?
Copy !req
278. Not much. A lot of dust.
Copy !req
279. Leave this here.
Copy !req
280. her tiny body
heaving fitfully.
Copy !req
281. He would not wake her.
Copy !req
282. It was better that
she find him gone.
Copy !req
283. You need
the security guard anymore?
Copy !req
284. What was that?
Copy !req
285. Is it okay if I let him
go back to the lobby?
Copy !req
286. Yeah, let him go.
Copy !req
287. from the window.
Copy !req
288. Lieutenant?
Copy !req
289. Shh.
Copy !req
290. Did you hear that?
Copy !req
291. They paid that
guy a lot of money
for writing that tripe.
Copy !req
292. Wait a minute.
Copy !req
293. Uh, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
294. Wait a minute.
Copy !req
295. from the window.
Copy !req
296. We found this
in the basement corridor.
Copy !req
297. It's been fired.
Copy !req
298. Hmm.
Copy !req
299. Where did you say
you found it?
In the corridor?
Copy !req
300. You mean, it was just
laying there,
right out in the open?
Copy !req
301. That's right.
Copy !req
302. We also found
some jimmy marks
Copy !req
303. on the outside basement door.
Copy !req
304. That's how the guy
got in the building.
Copy !req
305. Thank you very much.
Copy !req
306. Uh, Sweeney,
prints, Ballistics, please.
Copy !req
307. Sure, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
308. I'm all through here, anyway.
Copy !req
309. Sweeney?
Copy !req
310. What, Lieutenant?
Copy !req
311. Nothin'.
Copy !req
312. Sir?
Copy !req
313. Sir?
Copy !req
314. What? What?
Copy !req
315. What?
What—What—What is it? What?
Copy !req
316. What're you doin' here
parked in the park?
Copy !req
317. 'C-'Cause there's a sign
out there that said,
Copy !req
318. "No parking in the street."
Copy !req
319. Step out of your car,
please, sir.
Copy !req
320. Certainly—Certainly not.
Copy !req
321. I am on my way home,
Officer.
Copy !req
322. So would you kindly
shut that door, please?
Copy !req
323. Please, uh, step out
of the car, sir.
Copy !req
324. If you want me to
get out of this car,
Copy !req
325. Officer, or Sergeant,
Copy !req
326. you're gonna have to
drag me out.
Copy !req
327. Uh, Fred?
Copy !req
328. Need help, huh?
Copy !req
329. Lt. Columbo?
Copy !req
330. How're you doing?
Copy !req
331. Lieutenant, I would like
my client released.
Copy !req
332. He's being treated
like a common criminal,
Copy !req
333. and I want to know why.
Copy !req
334. Well, there has been
a crime.
Copy !req
335. Mr. Chase, is it?
Copy !req
336. David Chase.
Copy !req
337. Mr. Greenleaf?
Copy !req
338. Yes, that's right.
Copy !req
339. My name is Lt. Columbo.
Copy !req
340. Anybody want coffee?
Copy !req
341. No, I want to go home.
Copy !req
342. Why don't you just tell me
what the bail is,
Copy !req
343. and I'll take
Mr. Greenleaf home.
Copy !req
344. I wouldn't know, sir.
Copy !req
345. I'm not connected
with the Traffic Division.
Copy !req
346. I'm attached to Homicide.
Copy !req
347. Homicide?
Copy !req
348. Yeah.
Copy !req
349. What is all this about?
Copy !req
350. I just wanna ask
Mr. Greenleaf
Copy !req
351. if he can
identify a voice for me.
Copy !req
352. Now, just a minute.
Copy !req
353. Won't take long.
Copy !req
354. offering him hope
and a chance to wash away
Copy !req
355. the wounds of war
that had brutalized him.
Copy !req
356. He turned to
look at Li Chen
Copy !req
357. sleeping on
the straw mattress...
Copy !req
358. It's Allen's voice.
Copy !req
359. her tiny body
heaving fitfully.
Copy !req
360. He would not wake her.
Copy !req
361. It was better that
she find him gone.
Copy !req
362. Yes, it's Allen Mallory.
Copy !req
363. Slowly, he turned away...
Copy !req
364. All right,
I've identified the voice.
Copy !req
365. Can I leave now?
Copy !req
366. That's right, sir.
I'm afraid this man is dead.
Copy !req
367. Oh, God, no.
Copy !req
368. But who? Why?
Copy !req
369. That's what I wanted
to ask you, Mr. Mr. Greenleaf.
Copy !req
370. The medical examiner
sets the time of death
around 10:30.
Copy !req
371. Would you mind telling me
where you were at that time?
Copy !req
372. Riley, you don't have to
answer that question.
Copy !req
373. David, I don't mind
answering the question.
Copy !req
374. The fact is, Lieutenant,
Copy !req
375. I don't— I don't know
where I was.
Copy !req
376. Yes, it's true.
I saw Allen last night,
Copy !req
377. briefly, at a press party.
Copy !req
378. We had some words,
not important,
Copy !req
379. but I was very upset by it.
Copy !req
380. I drove around.
I'd been drinking quite a bit.
Copy !req
381. I don't remember
anything about last night.
Copy !req
382. Poor Allen.
Copy !req
383. I wonder if you can
identify this key.
Copy !req
384. No.
Copy !req
385. Would you mind
taking a closer look at it?
Copy !req
386. All keys look alike to me.
Copy !req
387. Yes, sir. But I believe
this is your key.
Copy !req
388. The building superintendent
told me
Copy !req
389. that Mr. Mallory's office
Copy !req
390. was leased
18 months ago by you.
Copy !req
391. This is one of the two keys
that he gave you.
Copy !req
392. If you say so.
Copy !req
393. Get to the point, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
394. We found this key
on the office floor,
Copy !req
395. a few feet from
Mr. Mallory's body.
Copy !req
396. Evidently, it belongs to him.
Copy !req
397. No, sir. We checked
the victim's key ring,
Copy !req
398. and the one that fit
the outer door
Copy !req
399. was on his person.
Copy !req
400. This key, your key,
Copy !req
401. this is the fellow
that bothers me.
Copy !req
402. I've already told you,
Copy !req
403. I don't know
anything about it.
Copy !req
404. What bothers you
about it, Lieutenant?
Copy !req
405. How it got there?
Copy !req
406. Could have been
dropped days before.
Copy !req
407. Do you own a.38
Smith & Wesson revolver?
Copy !req
408. Now, just a minute.
Copy !req
409. David,
I have nothing to hide.
Copy !req
410. Yes, I do own a pistol,
Copy !req
411. but I don't know
what make it is.
Copy !req
412. Lieutenant,
why are you asking me
Copy !req
413. all these questions?
Copy !req
414. Oh, surely you don't believe
I had anything to do
Copy !req
415. with Allen's death?
Copy !req
416. Well, obviously, some thief
broke into the office
Copy !req
417. when Allen was working.
Copy !req
418. There was nothing to steal.
Copy !req
419. Mr. Mallory's wallet
wasn't disturbed.
Copy !req
420. And you just said that
you were drinking last night.
Copy !req
421. You can't explain
your whereabouts
Copy !req
422. at the time of the death.
Copy !req
423. Riley, I'm sorry.
I must insist you
answer no more questions,
Copy !req
424. at least until we've
had a chance to confer.
Copy !req
425. Officer.
Copy !req
426. That is, unless Lt. Columbo
is placing you under arrest.
Copy !req
427. Arrest? No. No, no.
Copy !req
428. Mr. Greenleaf,
you're free to go.
Copy !req
429. I thought he might be.
Copy !req
430. But I may be asking
some questions later on.
Copy !req
431. Of course.
I'll be at home all day.
Copy !req
432. Dear God. Poor Allen.
Copy !req
433. David,
I just can't believe it.
Copy !req
434. I just can't believe it.
Copy !req
435. I'm gonna be very honest
with you, Miss McRae.
Copy !req
436. Actually, I'm interested
in the activities of
Copy !req
437. one particular person,
a Mr. Riley Greenleaf.
Copy !req
438. Well, you picked a beauty,
Lieutenant.
Copy !req
439. If anybody had it
in for Allen,
Copy !req
440. it was Riley Greenleaf.
Copy !req
441. Really? That seems strange.
Copy !req
442. You know, I spoke to
Mr. Greenleaf
earlier this morning.
Copy !req
443. He seemed to me
like he was genuinely upset,
Copy !req
444. acted like he'd lost
a close friend.
Copy !req
445. That's beautiful. Allen was
about to walk out on him,
Copy !req
446. taking a best-selling book
with him.
Copy !req
447. That must have been
the book
Copy !req
448. that Mr. Mallory
was dictating.
Copy !req
449. I see.
Copy !req
450. Gonna walk out
and take the book...
Copy !req
451. Well, wait a minute now.
Copy !req
452. I'm confused a little bit.
Copy !req
453. Wouldn't these two men
have a contract?
Copy !req
454. Yeah,
but it was about to expire.
Copy !req
455. In three weeks.
Copy !req
456. But still the book
would still belong
Copy !req
457. to Mr. Greenleaf,
wouldn't it?
Copy !req
458. You've got a lot to learn
Copy !req
459. about the publishing business,
Lieutenant.
Copy !req
460. Riley Greenleaf
didn't know about that book.
Copy !req
461. Allen never
talked to him about it,
Copy !req
462. and never would,
Copy !req
463. until he was free
of that contract.
Copy !req
464. I see. You mind if I smoke?
Copy !req
465. No.
Copy !req
466. I understand that
Mr. Greenleaf
Copy !req
467. has made threats
against Mr. Mallory.
Copy !req
468. You know anything about that?
Copy !req
469. Last night,
he said some ugly things.
Copy !req
470. He said if Allen
didn't write for him,
Copy !req
471. he wouldn't write for anybody.
Copy !req
472. He said that?
Copy !req
473. Yeah.
Copy !req
474. But— But don't take
my word for it,
Copy !req
475. there were a lot of
witnesses there.
Copy !req
476. No kidding.
Copy !req
477. Hmm.
Copy !req
478. The fact they questioned you
in a state of fatigue
Copy !req
479. opens the doors to
a serious consideration
Copy !req
480. of involuntary
self-incrimination.
Copy !req
481. On that basis alone,
I'm sure we could—
Copy !req
482. David,
would you please shut up?
Copy !req
483. You don't seem to realize
that Allen is dead,
Copy !req
484. and I may be
the one who killed him.
Copy !req
485. I'd keep that opinion to
myself if I were you, Riley.
Copy !req
486. A Lt. Columbo to see you, sir.
Copy !req
487. Yes, ask him to come in.
Thank you, Edwards.
Copy !req
488. Yes, sir.
Copy !req
489. Riley, you don't understand.
Copy !req
490. I'm as upset as you are
about Allen's death.
Copy !req
491. But you must not say
anything that could be
Copy !req
492. construed as
an admission of guilt.
Copy !req
493. Oh, Lieutenant,
Copy !req
494. I'd like to apologize
for this morning, but I...
Copy !req
495. I must tell you honestly,
Copy !req
496. I don't remember
a thing about last night.
Copy !req
497. I understand, sir.
Copy !req
498. Forgive the condition
of the room,
Copy !req
499. but I'm redecorating.
Copy !req
500. More questions, Lieutenant?
Copy !req
501. Or are you here to press
some kind of charges?
Copy !req
502. Well, sir, you see,
we traced the gun.
Copy !req
503. My gun.
It was my gun, wasn't it?
Copy !req
504. Yes, sir, we were able
to trace it to you.
Copy !req
505. Yeah, I knew that.
Copy !req
506. When I looked in the car,
in the glove compartment,
Copy !req
507. I saw that my gun was missing.
Copy !req
508. Well,
obviously someone stole it.
Copy !req
509. It doesn't look
that way, sir.
Copy !req
510. The only fingerprints
we were able to find
Copy !req
511. on the handle of that gun
were Mr. Greenleaf's.
Copy !req
512. There were no other
prints on the gun.
Copy !req
513. Well, that's it, isn't it?
Copy !req
514. Allen walked out on me,
Copy !req
515. took his latest book
to another publisher,
Copy !req
516. and I suppose
Copy !req
517. in anger, I killed him.
Copy !req
518. Oh, that new book,
I suppose that's a pretty
valuable piece of property.
Copy !req
519. Anything that he wrote
was valuable, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
520. If anybody was around to write
Copy !req
521. the first genuine
bestseller about Vietnam,
Copy !req
522. it certainly was
Allen Mallory.
Copy !req
523. Is that a fact, really?
Copy !req
524. I was always under
the impression
Copy !req
525. that war stories,
they all went over big.
Copy !req
526. Only our popular wars.
Copy !req
527. 30 years ago,
World War II was a goldmine.
Copy !req
528. But Vietnam that's a plague.
Copy !req
529. Hold it. Wait a minute.
Copy !req
530. I'm confused.
Either I'm confused,
Copy !req
531. or somebody's not
telling the truth.
Copy !req
532. I was told, Mr. Greenleaf,
Copy !req
533. that you knew nothing
about the contents
Copy !req
534. of Mr. Mallory's new book.
Copy !req
535. Actually, I don't.
It's just that this morning,
Copy !req
536. listening to
Allen's voice on the tape,
Copy !req
537. didn't he mention something
about Saigon and a war?
Copy !req
538. I—I just assumed that—
Copy !req
539. You're absolutely right.
I'm sorry, forgive me.
Copy !req
540. Well, this is a puzzler.
Copy !req
541. I—I don't know
quite what to say.
Copy !req
542. Do you remember taking
the gun out of your car?
Copy !req
543. No, but—
Copy !req
544. Riley, I warned you
not to say anything.
Copy !req
545. Will you please
stay out of this?
Copy !req
546. I can't watch you talk
yourself into a murder charge.
Copy !req
547. You'll do exactly
as I ask you to do,
Copy !req
548. and I pay you handsomely
just for that privilege.
So, please, stay out of it.
Copy !req
549. You say you've always
kept your gun in the car?
Copy !req
550. Yes.
Copy !req
551. Is that the car?
Copy !req
552. It is.
Copy !req
553. May I take a look?
Copy !req
554. Of course, if you'd like.
Copy !req
555. How long has this
lock been broken?
Copy !req
556. Well,
I don't know that it is.
Copy !req
557. It's been jimmied, sir,
and the scratch mark is fresh.
Copy !req
558. May I?
Copy !req
559. I think you're
absolutely right, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
560. I see what you're driving at.
Copy !req
561. You mean that—that
someone could have broken
into the car,
Copy !req
562. and that's how
the gun was stolen.
Copy !req
563. It's possible, sir.
Copy !req
564. And the key.
Copy !req
565. Sir?
Copy !req
566. The key to Allen's office,
I kept an extra one here
Copy !req
567. in the glove compartment,
along with the gun.
Copy !req
568. No, it's gone, too.
Copy !req
569. Mr. Greenleaf?
Copy !req
570. Yes.
Copy !req
571. Telephone, sir.
It's Mr. Trumble.
Copy !req
572. He says it's quite important.
Copy !req
573. David,
would you take the call?
Copy !req
574. I'm in no mood to discuss
insurance, please.
Copy !req
575. I'll have him
call back later.
Copy !req
576. Oh, no, wait.
Copy !req
577. You'd better find out
what he wants.
Copy !req
578. Yeah, I guess somebody
gave you a pretty good rap
back here.
Copy !req
579. Oh, yeah.
That's a beauty, isn't it?
Copy !req
580. That's the first time
I noticed that.
Copy !req
581. No kiddin'.
Copy !req
582. I'll tell you,
bodywork like that,
Copy !req
583. gotta run you $100-$150.
Copy !req
584. Lieutenant,
when you own a car like this,
Copy !req
585. it costs that much
merely to raise the hood.
Copy !req
586. No kiddin'.
Copy !req
587. Sure.
Copy !req
588. Listen, my wife's got
a cousin in the Valley,
who owns a body shop,
Copy !req
589. I mean, if you want me
to talk to him...
Copy !req
590. That's very decent of you.
Copy !req
591. You see, I have
a cousin in Beverly Hills.
Copy !req
592. He does all my work for me.
Copy !req
593. Lieutenant, I have some
disappointing news for you.
Copy !req
594. You'll have to stick this
murder on somebody else.
Copy !req
595. Riley's got an alibi that
even he doesn't know about
Copy !req
596. and it's iron-clad.
Copy !req
597. Well, what is it?
Copy !req
598. I mean,
I'm very glad to hear that.
Copy !req
599. At 10:30 last evening,
Riley Greenleaf
Copy !req
600. was involved in
an auto accident
Copy !req
601. in the parking lot
of the Moore Park Inn.
Copy !req
602. That's in Encino.
Copy !req
603. Encino? What the devil
was I doing there?
Copy !req
604. You were drinking at the bar,
I'm pleased to inform you.
Copy !req
605. Then he was taken to jail,
where he spent
Copy !req
606. most of the evening
in the drunk tank
Copy !req
607. till I got him out.
Copy !req
608. An experience I don't wish
to relive, thank you.
Copy !req
609. Yeah—Yeah, son of a gun.
Copy !req
610. Well, I guess that
just about does it.
Copy !req
611. You may say that again.
Copy !req
612. All I can say is,
thank God.
Copy !req
613. A blackout is
a frightening thing.
Copy !req
614. I must be grateful
to those people
Copy !req
615. for having the good sense
Copy !req
616. to call my
insurance company to report—
Copy !req
617. David, do you realize
that if those people
Copy !req
618. had not contacted
Mark Trumble—
Copy !req
619. What— what would have...
Copy !req
620. I don't even want
to think about that.
Copy !req
621. That accident there,
that must have been
Copy !req
622. where you damaged
the rear end of your car.
Copy !req
623. Yes, I suppose so.
Copy !req
624. Well, listen, I'd better go
check this thing out.
Copy !req
625. Still, it's funny.
Copy !req
626. What's that, Lieutenant?
Copy !req
627. Fingerprints.
Copy !req
628. The fact that
Copy !req
629. only your fingerprints
were on the gun.
Copy !req
630. Well, listen, I don't
want to impose on you.
Copy !req
631. Thank you very much
for the cooperation.
Copy !req
632. Oh, you're more than welcome.
Copy !req
633. Please don't hesitate to call
Copy !req
634. if—if there's
anything I can do.
Copy !req
635. Oh, yes, sir.
Copy !req
636. Lt. Columbo.
Copy !req
637. Sir?
Copy !req
638. I suppose you realize
what you almost did?
Copy !req
639. Sir?
Copy !req
640. You were going to arrest him,
weren't you?
Copy !req
641. Well, it did seem to me
Copy !req
642. that—that he was
somehow involved.
Copy !req
643. Seemed.
Copy !req
644. When are you
police going to realize
Copy !req
645. that it takes more than
circumstantial evidence
Copy !req
646. to convict a man of a crime?
Copy !req
647. David.
Copy !req
648. Evidence.
Copy !req
649. Find the evidence,
Lieutenant.
Copy !req
650. Quit jumping to conclusions
Copy !req
651. and quit trying to
take the easy way.
Copy !req
652. Oh, Mr. Chase, uh, one thing.
Copy !req
653. About that accident,
Copy !req
654. do you happen to know
who else was involved?
Copy !req
655. It's a couple from El Monte.
Copy !req
656. Mr. and Mrs. Morgan. Why?
Copy !req
657. Well, you see,
I didn't know, uh...
Copy !req
658. I just wasn't sure
Copy !req
659. whether it was just
one person in the other car,
Copy !req
660. or whether there was
more than one.
Copy !req
661. And, uh, when...
Copy !req
662. No, I was just telling
your attorney
that I wasn't sure
Copy !req
663. whether there was just
one person in the other car
Copy !req
664. or whether there
was more than one.
Copy !req
665. And when you said
that you were relieved
Copy !req
666. that those people,
more than one,
Copy !req
667. when you were relieved
that those people
Copy !req
668. called your insurance man,
Copy !req
669. I thought maybe the blackout
was starting to clear up,
Copy !req
670. and you were beginning
to remember what happened.
Copy !req
671. Perhaps he is,
subconsciously.
Copy !req
672. That's probably it.
His subconscious.
Copy !req
673. I don't care what he says,
David.
Copy !req
674. He's a 2-bit writer.
Copy !req
675. You tell him to sign
the writer on that contract,
Copy !req
676. or he's out.
Copy !req
677. Oh, he'll sign it.
He's hungry. Thanks, David.
Copy !req
678. Yes, Betsy?
Copy !req
679. Mr. Greenleaf,
there's a strange man
Copy !req
680. wandering around
the editorial section.
Copy !req
681. I thought you should know.
Copy !req
682. What do you want me to do?
Copy !req
683. You want to get rid of him,
call the police.
Copy !req
684. That's just it.
He says he is the police.
Copy !req
685. Look, you're not supposed to
wrestle her to the deck.
Copy !req
686. You're supposed to make her
swoon with passion.
Copy !req
687. Now give it to me.
Give it to me.
Copy !req
688. His T-shirt smells.
Copy !req
689. His T-shirt smells?
Your T-shirt smells?
Copy !req
690. Columbo,
Copy !req
691. would you please tell me
what you're doing here?
Copy !req
692. Oh, I see you're free, sir.
Copy !req
693. The receptionist told me
you were tied up,
Copy !req
694. so I decided
to wander around.
Copy !req
695. I hope you don't mind.
Copy !req
696. Yes, I'm afraid I do mind.
Copy !req
697. My people happen
to be very busy.
Copy !req
698. Yes, sir. I can see that.
I'm very sorry.
Copy !req
699. What are they doing in there?
Copy !req
700. Oh, we're shooting a cover
for a new paperback.
Copy !req
701. It's on anthropology.
Copy !req
702. Uh, Mr. Greenleaf,
I came by to tell you that
Copy !req
703. I've checked out
that accident,
Copy !req
704. and there's no
question about it.
Copy !req
705. You were there.
Copy !req
706. Oh, I can't tell you how
relieved I am to hear that.
Copy !req
707. I'm—I'm sorry I yelled.
Copy !req
708. The only thing
I have to do now, sir,
Copy !req
709. is try and find
the person who framed you.
Copy !req
710. Frame me?
Copy !req
711. Yes, sir. It was a frame.
Copy !req
712. No question about it.
Copy !req
713. The fingerprints on the gun,
Copy !req
714. too perfect,
not smudged at all.
Copy !req
715. Now since we know that
you didn't shoot Mr. Mallory
Copy !req
716. that means that
whoever fired that pistol
Copy !req
717. was very careful not to
disturb your fingerprints.
Copy !req
718. I just can't believe that.
Copy !req
719. Oh, it's
a frightening thought,
all right.
Copy !req
720. But you know,
you were very lucky,
Copy !req
721. I mean with that accident.
Copy !req
722. I mean, the time it happened
and the witnesses.
Copy !req
723. Count your blessings, sir.
Copy !req
724. You know, if it hadn't been
for that accident,
Copy !req
725. things would've looked
very bad for you now.
Copy !req
726. You know, uh, lookin' at
some of these posters
Copy !req
727. got me thinkin'.
Copy !req
728. They got a guy
down at the department
Copy !req
729. who wrote a couple of books.
Copy !req
730. Maybe you've heard of him.
Copy !req
731. What's his name?
Copy !req
732. Yes, I know who you mean,
Lieutenant.
Copy !req
733. You know,
he's only a sergeant
Copy !req
734. and I've handled
a lot more cases than he has.
Copy !req
735. I was thinkin'--
Copy !req
736. That maybe you might
write a book?
Copy !req
737. Oh, I'm not talkin'
about a big book.
Copy !req
738. You know, I mean,
maybe a short book,
Copy !req
739. just to get the hang of it.
Some of my cases.
Copy !req
740. Sure, why not?
Copy !req
741. Except that if you're gonna
write a book,
Copy !req
742. it takes
a certain amount of skill.
Copy !req
743. Oh, I don't expect to be
a great writer
Copy !req
744. like Mr. Mallory
or anything like that. No.
Copy !req
745. Uh, jeez, you know,
that reminds me.
Copy !req
746. He must've been
very valuable to you, sir.
Copy !req
747. The insurance guy told me
Copy !req
748. that you took out
a—a life-insurance policy
Copy !req
749. on his life. $1 million?
Copy !req
750. Oh, that's a usual practice
in this business, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
751. But, as you say,
valuable property.
Copy !req
752. That's right. I forgot
all about the policy.
Copy !req
753. No kidding.
Copy !req
754. That's funny.
According to my notes,
Copy !req
755. the company sent you
a renewal slip last week.
Copy !req
756. I wouldn't know
anything about that.
Copy !req
757. We have an accountant
that handles all that stuff.
Copy !req
758. Listen, I certainly hope
Copy !req
759. you get the men
that you're after.
Copy !req
760. If anybody can do it,
you're the man.
Copy !req
761. Oh, thank you, sir.
Copy !req
762. Good luck with that writing,
keep that up. That's good.
Copy !req
763. Oh, I intend to.
Copy !req
764. You know, it's hard
at home with the family.
Copy !req
765. Mmm-hmm. Sure.
Copy !req
766. Oh, listen.
Uh, gee, I almost forgot.
Copy !req
767. There's one thing
about the Mallory case
Copy !req
768. that bothers me.
Maybe you can help me.
Copy !req
769. Um, I cannot figure out
how the murderer
Copy !req
770. got into Mallory's office
Copy !req
771. since the lock wasn't broken,
Copy !req
772. and there's no sign
of forced entry.
Copy !req
773. With the key.
Copy !req
774. The one that you
found on the floor.
Copy !req
775. The one that was stolen
from my glove compartment.
Copy !req
776. You mean— You mean this key?
Copy !req
777. There it is.
Copy !req
778. No.
Copy !req
779. No, I guess this was
part of the frame-up.
Copy !req
780. This key
doesn't fit the lock.
Copy !req
781. I found out that
Mallory changed the lock
Copy !req
782. about three weeks ago.
Copy !req
783. He did?
Copy !req
784. Yeah.
Copy !req
785. I guess he didn't want
anybody goin' in there
Copy !req
786. and lookin' at
what he was writing.
Copy !req
787. Yes, but—
Copy !req
788. This key was left there
to incriminate you.
Copy !req
789. No doubt about it.
Copy !req
790. But that still
doesn't tell us how
Copy !req
791. the murderer got
into the office that night.
Copy !req
792. Well, evidently,
Allen must have let him in,
Copy !req
793. opened the door not knowing—
Copy !req
794. No, sir.
Copy !req
795. No, that would've been
on the tape-recording.
Copy !req
796. Mr. Mallory's voice
was never interrupted.
Copy !req
797. No. Whoever killed him
Copy !req
798. got in without
Mallory's knowledge,
Copy !req
799. sneaked up on him
when he was dictating.
Copy !req
800. It's puzzling, isn't it?
Copy !req
801. Baffling.
Copy !req
802. Yeah.
Copy !req
803. There has to be another key
to the new lock.
Copy !req
804. I'll tell you,
Copy !req
805. if I could find the person
with that new key,
Copy !req
806. I'd find the person
that killed Mr. Mallory.
Copy !req
807. I don't envy you.
Copy !req
808. That is not
an easy assignment.
Copy !req
809. Oh, listen,
you don't have to tell me.
Copy !req
810. Okay.
Copy !req
811. Thank you very much.
Copy !req
812. All the luck.
Copy !req
813. Thanks.
Copy !req
814. Yeah?
Copy !req
815. Hello, Eddie. This is
your publisher calling.
Copy !req
816. It's been three days, skipper.
Copy !req
817. What do you say
we get together?
Copy !req
818. Yes, I know Eddie.
Copy !req
819. Uh, would tonight
be convenient?
Copy !req
820. Your place?
Better tell me where it is.
Copy !req
821. Yeah,
320 Howard, over the garage.
Copy !req
822. What time?
Copy !req
823. Oh, shall we say 2200 hours?
Copy !req
824. You're learnin', skip. Out.
Copy !req
825. Yes, Eddie, out.
Copy !req
826. Hello, Moishe?
It's Riley Greenleaf, here.
Copy !req
827. I'll tell you what,
I need a favor.
Copy !req
828. I need to have
a key made for a door
Copy !req
829. to a certain office building.
Copy !req
830. Problem is,
I need it this afternoon.
Copy !req
831. You think you can swing that?
Copy !req
832. Oh, fine.
Copy !req
833. Tell him I'll make it
worth his while.
Copy !req
834. Yo, it's open.
Copy !req
835. Hey. Hi.
Copy !req
836. I've been meaning to ask you,
Copy !req
837. all this stuff that you
keep here in your— your home,
Copy !req
838. is it legal?
Copy !req
839. It's all made
in the U.S. of A.
Pull up a sofa.
Copy !req
840. Oh, hey!
Copy !req
841. I made some drawings today
Copy !req
842. for my chapter on
Bouncin' Betties.
Copy !req
843. You did? Fine.
Copy !req
844. What's a Bouncing Betty?
Copy !req
845. Anti-personnel mine.
Copy !req
846. You got to really plant
these things just right.
Copy !req
847. Now you see, you lay it
down six inches. No more.
Copy !req
848. You leave the pressure plate
Copy !req
849. with just about a half inch
of dirt and leaves.
Copy !req
850. The guy steps on it. Whammo!
Copy !req
851. You get the legs.
It's beautiful.
Copy !req
852. Oh, yeah. That's beautiful.
Copy !req
853. Well,
it calls for a celebration.
Copy !req
854. A little— little drinking?
Copy !req
855. Hey, that's nice.
Real champagne?
Copy !req
856. Absolutely.
Copy !req
857. Nothing but
the best for Eddie Kane, huh?
Copy !req
858. I'll have to
get used to that idea.
Copy !req
859. You should, Eddie.
Copy !req
860. After all, you deserve it.
Copy !req
861. Perfect.
Copy !req
862. A toast, Eddie.
Shall we say, uh,
Copy !req
863. bombs away?
Copy !req
864. Bombs away? I like it.
I like it. Right on.
Copy !req
865. Mmm.
Copy !req
866. Yeah, there we are.
Copy !req
867. I've been meaning to ask you,
Copy !req
868. did you run into any problems
the other night?
Copy !req
869. No.
Copy !req
870. No trouble getting into
Mallory's office?
Copy !req
871. The door was open,
but I left the key
Copy !req
872. on the floor anyway,
like you told me.
Copy !req
873. Splendid,
now about the book.
Copy !req
874. Yeah.
Copy !req
875. Is there any information
contained in the book,
Copy !req
876. that could be
in violation of
Copy !req
877. military requirements
or—or defense secrets?
Copy !req
878. Are you kidding me?
Copy !req
879. All the specifications
Copy !req
880. are in
the manufacturer's brochure.
Copy !req
881. All I'm doin' with my book
Copy !req
882. is to say
how to use them right.
Copy !req
883. I've got ideas for bombs
Copy !req
884. those guys never even
thought of.
Copy !req
885. Here.
Copy !req
886. Never even thought of.
Copy !req
887. I got— got this funny...
Copy !req
888. Something the matter, Eddie?
Copy !req
889. I— I don't know, I...
Copy !req
890. Dear Mr. Greenleaf.
Copy !req
891. Is this the right place?
Copy !req
892. For what?
Copy !req
893. To park the car.
Copy !req
894. Permanently?
Copy !req
895. No, I'm going in to lunch.
Copy !req
896. Hi, Sharon.
Copy !req
897. Hi. How are you?
Copy !req
898. Good to see you.
Copy !req
899. Oh, thank you.
Copy !req
900. Thanks a lot, Rocco.
Copy !req
901. You're welcome.
Copy !req
902. Excuse me,
don't I need a parking check?
Copy !req
903. Listen, mister,
I'll remember your car.
Copy !req
904. May I help you?
Copy !req
905. Uh, thank you very much.
Copy !req
906. Excuse me, Mr. Neal?
Copy !req
907. Yes?
Copy !req
908. I'm...
Copy !req
909. Geoffrey,
this is Lt. Columbo.
Copy !req
910. Oh, yes,
would you like to sit down?
Copy !req
911. Thank you very much.
Copy !req
912. I don't want to bother you.
Copy !req
913. I called your office and they
told me you were over here.
Copy !req
914. I— I hope you don't mind.
Copy !req
915. Oh, no. No, not at all.
Copy !req
916. Will you have
something to eat?
Copy !req
917. Oh, no.
Copy !req
918. Please— Please join us.
Copy !req
919. Well, listen,
now that you mentioned it,
Copy !req
920. I could use somethin', so...
Copy !req
921. Charles, see what
the Lieutenant will have.
Copy !req
922. Big menu.
Copy !req
923. Uh, Sweetbreads Financier...
Copy !req
924. Can't pronounce that.
Copy !req
925. The Trout Amandine
is very good.
Copy !req
926. Amandine. What is that with?
That's with...
Copy !req
927. Almonds.
Copy !req
928. With almonds. Fish.
Copy !req
929. Well,
I was thinkin' of somethin'
Copy !req
930. a little bit more, with body.
Copy !req
931. I'll tell you what,
Copy !req
932. if you don't mind,
do you have any chili?
Copy !req
933. Chili?
Copy !req
934. Yeah,
with beans or without beans,
Copy !req
935. either way, it doesn't
make any difference.
Copy !req
936. Chili.
Copy !req
937. Ask Henri to see what he can
do for our friend here.
Copy !req
938. Yes, sir.
Copy !req
939. Thank you very much.
Copy !req
940. I'll have a little
iced tea with that.
Copy !req
941. Mr. Neal, uh, what I wanted
to ask you was...
Copy !req
942. How are you doin'?
Copy !req
943. Fine, sir.
Copy !req
944. This is what I wanted
to ask you, Mr. Neal.
Copy !req
945. I understand that
your attorneys
are tryin' to get
Copy !req
946. a release of
Mr. Mallory's manuscript.
Copy !req
947. Yes, 60 MILES TO SAIGON.
Copy !req
948. I agreed to publish it
Copy !req
949. after Mallory's contract
expired with Greenleaf.
Copy !req
950. And I want to get hold of it
before he can,
Copy !req
951. because, well, I'm afraid
he's going to make trouble.
Copy !req
952. It's a very valuable book?
Copy !req
953. We think so. After all,
the man has written
Copy !req
954. nothing but bestsellers.
Copy !req
955. Uh, have you read it?
Copy !req
956. Oh, no, nobody's read it.
Copy !req
957. Nobody?
Copy !req
958. Nobody. Of course, Eileen
discussed the end with him.
Copy !req
959. As a matter of fact,
I believe she even made
a contribution to it.
Copy !req
960. Well,
it was just a little one,
Copy !req
961. believe me, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
962. Pardon me.
Copy !req
963. I'll have a little ketchup.
Copy !req
964. Ketchup?
Copy !req
965. Ketchup.
Copy !req
966. All right, sir.
Copy !req
967. And some crackers.
Copy !req
968. Don't wait for us,
Lieutenant.
Copy !req
969. Right.
Copy !req
970. Please eat.
Copy !req
971. I wanted to get those
saltines if he had any.
Copy !req
972. Well...
Copy !req
973. Mr. Neal discussed the book
with Universal Studios.
Copy !req
974. They wanted
a picture for Rock Hudson.
Copy !req
975. The only trouble
with that was that
Copy !req
976. Allen was planning
to kill the hero off
Copy !req
977. in the final pages.
Copy !req
978. Universal said, for $100,000,
Copy !req
979. you don't kill off
Rock Hudson.
Copy !req
980. As I understood it,
Allen's hero was a P.O.W.
Copy !req
981. who betrayed his own men,
Copy !req
982. but then found his courage,
came back,
Copy !req
983. and helped them escape
from the prison camp.
Copy !req
984. You see, Allen insisted that
his hero had a tragic flaw
Copy !req
985. which classically
ends in death.
Copy !req
986. That's where
Eileen was so helpful.
Copy !req
987. After the escape,
after they get back to Saigon,
Copy !req
988. Rock Hudson says
goodbye to the girl
Copy !req
989. who helped him
regain his courage,
Copy !req
990. says goodbye to
the material world,
Copy !req
991. and goes off to a monastery.
Copy !req
992. Is that good?
Copy !req
993. If it sells, it is.
Copy !req
994. This chili's good,
I'll tell you that.
Copy !req
995. Uh, the question that
comes to mind now is
Copy !req
996. can either one
of you two people
think of someone
Copy !req
997. who might want to
frame Mr. Greenleaf?
Copy !req
998. Frame— Frame Riley?
Copy !req
999. That's right, ma'am.
Copy !req
1000. That's what I think happened.
Copy !req
1001. I think someone's
tryin' to pin
Copy !req
1002. this murder on Mr. Greenleaf.
Copy !req
1003. But, surely, you don't think
Copy !req
1004. that either one of us
had anything—
Copy !req
1005. I'm just asking the question,
ma'am.
Copy !req
1006. Well,
Copy !req
1007. I suppose I
might have a motive,
Copy !req
1008. being his competitor.
Copy !req
1009. But I'm sorry, Lieutenant.
That's not my style.
Copy !req
1010. Anyway, if I wanted
to frame Riley,
Copy !req
1011. it certainly wouldn't be for
the death of Allen Mallory,
Copy !req
1012. who I very much
wanted to write for us.
Copy !req
1013. Oh, that's all right,
I'm practically finished.
Copy !req
1014. I'll have a check.
Copy !req
1015. Oh, no, Lieutenant,
please, please, be my guest.
Copy !req
1016. No, no, uh,
this is department business
Copy !req
1017. and when it's
department business,
Copy !req
1018. the department pays for it.
Copy !req
1019. All right, if you insist.
Copy !req
1020. Excuse me, sir.
Are you Lt. Columbo?
Copy !req
1021. Yeah.
Copy !req
1022. There's a telephone call
for you, sir.
Copy !req
1023. Well, look, uh,
I'll run along.
Copy !req
1024. I want to
thank you very much.
Copy !req
1025. You've been very hospitable.
Copy !req
1026. Good day, sir.
Copy !req
1027. Pleasure.
Copy !req
1028. Ma'am.
Copy !req
1029. Having a hard time
getting up.
Copy !req
1030. Columbo. Yeah.
Copy !req
1031. Where?
Copy !req
1032. Your check, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
1033. Can I borrow a pencil?
Copy !req
1034. Got it. Thank you.
Copy !req
1035. Thank you.
Copy !req
1036. $6. Excuse me.
Copy !req
1037. No, I think
there's a mistake.
Copy !req
1038. I had the chili
and the iced tea.
Copy !req
1039. Oh.
Copy !req
1040. $6.75?
Copy !req
1041. I forgot to add the iced tea.
Copy !req
1042. Name of Eddie Kane.
Copy !req
1043. Blew himself up last night
with a hand grenade.
Copy !req
1044. Real weirdo.
Copy !req
1045. Must've been rigging a bomb.
Copy !req
1046. A bomb? What for?
Copy !req
1047. Don't ask me.
Copy !req
1048. Looks like
he's writing a book.
Copy !req
1049. "How to Blow Up Anything
in Ten Easy Lessons."
Copy !req
1050. The reason I had
Central contact you,
Copy !req
1051. you know that
murder downtown?
Copy !req
1052. That writer, Mallory?
Copy !req
1053. Yeah?
Copy !req
1054. We thought we had a case
against the publisher,
Greenleaf?
Copy !req
1055. Right.
Copy !req
1056. Well,
it may not mean anything,
Copy !req
1057. but I found
Kane's address book,
Copy !req
1058. and Greenleaf is in it.
Copy !req
1059. Riley Greenleaf.
Copy !req
1060. Thought it might
be something.
Copy !req
1061. You son of a gun.
Copy !req
1062. Hmm.
Copy !req
1063. You mind if I look around?
Copy !req
1064. Go right ahead.
My boys are all through.
Copy !req
1065. You want a cup of coffee
or somethin'?
Copy !req
1066. No, no, thanks.
I just ate.
Copy !req
1067. You want some advice?
Copy !req
1068. Be careful
where you eat chili.
Copy !req
1069. Why? Too hot?
Copy !req
1070. Too high.
Copy !req
1071. Wait a minute.
Copy !req
1072. What?
Copy !req
1073. I'll be a son of a gun.
Copy !req
1074. I can't believe it.
Copy !req
1075. "60 MILES TO SAIGON."
Copy !req
1076. Outline for a novel.
Copy !req
1077. You think that
ties Eddie Kane
Copy !req
1078. with the Mallory murder?
Copy !req
1079. Yeah.
Copy !req
1080. Could be.
Copy !req
1081. Lieutenant,
you sure are lucky sometimes.
Copy !req
1082. That's me. I'm lucky.
Copy !req
1083. You didn't happen
to find a key chain
Copy !req
1084. on this fellow, did you?
Copy !req
1085. As a matter of fact, we did.
Copy !req
1086. You didn't happen
to find a key
Copy !req
1087. that doesn't fit
anything in this place?
Copy !req
1088. Well,
there's one for the door,
Copy !req
1089. one for his car,
and this one.
Copy !req
1090. Who knows?
Copy !req
1091. Oh, yeah.
Copy !req
1092. Excuse me, Mr. Greenleaf?
Copy !req
1093. Shh!
Copy !req
1094. Excuse me.
Copy !req
1095. I'm sorry to disturb
your movie, Mr. Greenleaf,
Copy !req
1096. but this is very important.
Copy !req
1097. We found the man
that killed Mr. Mallory.
Copy !req
1098. Want to save it, Andy?
Copy !req
1099. Unfortunately, uh,
he was killed last night.
Copy !req
1100. His name was Eddie Kane.
Copy !req
1101. He was killed?
Copy !req
1102. Yes, there was
some kind of an accident.
Copy !req
1103. He seemed to be
fooling around
Copy !req
1104. with a homemade bomb.
Copy !req
1105. Hmm. Sounds gruesome.
Copy !req
1106. It was.
Copy !req
1107. Uh, for the purposes of
my report,
Copy !req
1108. I wonder if you could tell me
a little bit more about him.
Copy !req
1109. Me? I never heard of the man.
Copy !req
1110. Well, now,
that's strange, sir,
Copy !req
1111. because your telephone
number and your name
Copy !req
1112. we found in his
address book.
Copy !req
1113. That's bizarre.
Copy !req
1114. I don't know
how he obtained it.
Copy !req
1115. I've never heard
of any Eddie Kane.
Copy !req
1116. Now,
that's just not true, sir.
Copy !req
1117. I, myself, went through
his file drawer
Copy !req
1118. and I found a duplicate
of a letter from Kane
Copy !req
1119. addressed to you,
written nine months ago.
Copy !req
1120. Had to do with a novel
called 60 MILES TO SAIGON.
Copy !req
1121. He was offering to write it.
Copy !req
1122. He also enclosed an outline.
Copy !req
1123. Now, that was the name
of Mr. Mallory's new book,
wasn't it?
Copy !req
1124. I wouldn't know, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
1125. He never discussed
the book with me.
Copy !req
1126. Mr. Greenleaf, the point is,
Copy !req
1127. have you heard of
Mr. Kane, or haven't you?
Copy !req
1128. And I think you have.
Copy !req
1129. And I think you ought to
tell me about it.
Copy !req
1130. You could do it here,
Copy !req
1131. or you can do it
at headquarters.
Copy !req
1132. All right, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
1133. I never was
a very good liar.
Copy !req
1134. You might just want
to know the truth.
Copy !req
1135. Eddie Kane mailed me
this outline last year.
Copy !req
1136. And the moment I read it,
I realized it had
Copy !req
1137. the makings of
a very commercial book.
Copy !req
1138. But I also realized
that Eddie Kane
Copy !req
1139. was not the guy
to write it.
Copy !req
1140. I mean,
he simply wasn't a writer.
Copy !req
1141. Fortunately, Allen was
looking around for a new idea.
Copy !req
1142. When I showed him this,
he jumped at it.
Copy !req
1143. Lieutenant,
I was not trying to steal it.
Copy !req
1144. Quite the contrary.
I offered Eddie Kane $5,000
for it.
Copy !req
1145. He refused.
He was like a wild man.
Copy !req
1146. He was insulting, abusive...
Copy !req
1147. But you didn't
return the outline?
Copy !req
1148. It was too late then.
Copy !req
1149. Allen was already
at work on the book.
Copy !req
1150. So what did Mr. Kane do?
Copy !req
1151. He threatened me,
threatened Allen, too.
Copy !req
1152. I tried to reason with him.
Copy !req
1153. I even offered him
part of my profits,
Copy !req
1154. but he was adamant.
Copy !req
1155. I never thought
he'd be crazy enough to...
Copy !req
1156. I guess he killed Allen
and he tried to frame me.
Copy !req
1157. You know, in many ways,
I'm really to blame.
Copy !req
1158. Well, I can understand
how you feel, sir.
Copy !req
1159. I mean, that wasn't
exactly an ethical thing
Copy !req
1160. that you did, was it?
Copy !req
1161. No, no, it wasn't.
Copy !req
1162. All right, Mr. Greenleaf,
I'll be running along then.
Copy !req
1163. Oh, you don't mind if I
take this outline with me?
Copy !req
1164. I just wanna
take it to the lab
Copy !req
1165. and have them
check the typing
Copy !req
1166. against Eddie Kane's
typewriter.
Copy !req
1167. No, of course.You understand?
Copy !req
1168. Oh, sure.
Copy !req
1169. Good day, sir.
Copy !req
1170. Good day, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
1171. Feel better.
Copy !req
1172. Thanks very much.
Copy !req
1173. Oh, I don't have to
read anymore, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
1174. This is the outline
for Allen's book.
Copy !req
1175. I can't believe it.
Copy !req
1176. He wouldn't plagiarize this,
he wouldn't have to.
Copy !req
1177. Well, I'm sure
you're right, ma'am,
Copy !req
1178. but I double-checked
with the lab.
Copy !req
1179. That synopsis was
definitely typed
Copy !req
1180. on Eddie Kane's typewriter.
Copy !req
1181. Well, I— I wish I could
help you, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
1182. I— I guess I can't.
Copy !req
1183. All right,
thank you very much.
Copy !req
1184. I appreciate your time.
Copy !req
1185. Sorry.
Copy !req
1186. Oh, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
1187. Yes?
Copy !req
1188. Your evidence.
Copy !req
1189. Oh.
Copy !req
1190. I get preoccupied,
I forget my head.
Copy !req
1191. You know, that synopsis,
Copy !req
1192. it's as though
Allen dictated it himself.
Copy !req
1193. Wait a minute. Maybe he did.
Copy !req
1194. May I use your telephone?
Copy !req
1195. Sure.
Copy !req
1196. Could you do one more thing?
Copy !req
1197. Could you finish
reading that?
Copy !req
1198. I don't understand.
Copy !req
1199. Please, ma'am.
Would you just read it?
Copy !req
1200. You did find the key?
Copy !req
1201. On Eddie Kane's key ring, huh?
Copy !req
1202. Well, you should be
very happy, Lieutenant.
Copy !req
1203. When? Now?
Copy !req
1204. Tonight?
Copy !req
1205. May I ask, why there?
Copy !req
1206. Yes, of course.
I'll come right away.
Copy !req
1207. Good evening,
Mr. Greenleaf.
Copy !req
1208. You writing the great
American novel, Lieutenant,
Copy !req
1209. or just boning up
on the touch system?
Copy !req
1210. I want to tell you something,
Copy !req
1211. this writing is not
as easy as it looks.
Copy !req
1212. You know, uh,
I was on a case once.
Copy !req
1213. A candidate for
the United States Senate.
Copy !req
1214. He had a lot of
security men around him
Copy !req
1215. 'cause there'd been threats
against his life.
Copy !req
1216. Now, in order to shake
the security men,
Copy !req
1217. he changes clothes
with his campaign manager.
Copy !req
1218. Then he shoots
the campaign manager
Copy !req
1219. and he makes it look like
an attempt on his life.
Copy !req
1220. Now,
that's a heck of a story.
Copy !req
1221. There's only one problem,
I was telling my wife.
Copy !req
1222. I got it all up here,
I can't put it down here.
Copy !req
1223. Lieutenant, very frankly,
Copy !req
1224. I don't give a damn about
your senator or your story.
Copy !req
1225. Now, look,
I've got people coming over
to my house tonight.
Copy !req
1226. Just exactly
what is your problem?
Copy !req
1227. Oh, forgive me, sir.
Copy !req
1228. I didn't know you were
expecting guests.
Copy !req
1229. Did I tell you
Copy !req
1230. that the key
that was on the floor
Copy !req
1231. next to the body
didn't fit the lock?
Copy !req
1232. Yes, you mentioned it
the other day.
Copy !req
1233. You said that there
had to be another key
Copy !req
1234. to fit the new lock,
and when you had that key,
Copy !req
1235. then you'd have the person
who murdered Allen Mallory.
Copy !req
1236. Right. Right. I knew I
only told one person,
Copy !req
1237. I wasn't sure who.
Copy !req
1238. But it was you?
Copy !req
1239. Yes, it was me.
Copy !req
1240. And now you just
tell me on the telephone,
Copy !req
1241. you found that key,
it was on Eddie Kane.
Copy !req
1242. Right, we found it.
Here it is.
Copy !req
1243. But there's a problem.
Copy !req
1244. Well, what's the problem?
Doesn't the key fit the lock?
Copy !req
1245. No, it fits, the key fits,
Copy !req
1246. fits like a glove.
Copy !req
1247. All right,
there's your answer.
Copy !req
1248. Then obviously,
that's the key
Copy !req
1249. that Eddie Kane used
the night he came in here.
Copy !req
1250. No, that would be impossible.
Copy !req
1251. Why?
Copy !req
1252. Officer,
would you bring in Mr. Black?
Copy !req
1253. Just wouldn't be possible.
Copy !req
1254. Look, forgive me for— for
seeming dumb about this thing,
Copy !req
1255. but I just don't understand.
Copy !req
1256. You've just shown me a key
that fits that lock.
Copy !req
1257. Right. Right, sir.
It does fit.
Copy !req
1258. Good evening, Mr. Black.
Copy !req
1259. But, uh...
Copy !req
1260. that lock wasn't
on the door that night.
Copy !req
1261. Oh, Mr. Black, Mr. Greenleaf.
Copy !req
1262. Yeah. How do you do?
Copy !req
1263. How do you do?
Copy !req
1264. Mr. Black is a locksmith.
Copy !req
1265. Right.
Copy !req
1266. Mr. Black,
Copy !req
1267. would you tell Mr. Greenleaf
Copy !req
1268. when you put this lock
on this door?
Copy !req
1269. Oh, that— that was Thursday.
Copy !req
1270. That was the day
after that writer,
Copy !req
1271. Mr. Mallory, was shot.
Copy !req
1272. The day after?
Copy !req
1273. I don't understand that.
Copy !req
1274. Who ordered you
to change the lock?
Copy !req
1275. He did.
Copy !req
1276. Yes, sir. I did.
Copy !req
1277. Which raises
a very troublesome question.
Copy !req
1278. That will be all, Mr. Black.
Copy !req
1279. For the life of me,
I cannot figure out
Copy !req
1280. how Eddie Kane would
have a key to a lock
Copy !req
1281. that was put on the door
on my instructions
Copy !req
1282. the day after
he shot Mallory.
Copy !req
1283. Does that make
any sense to you?
Copy !req
1284. No, not at all.
Copy !req
1285. Why would Kane
even come back here?
Copy !req
1286. Sure is a puzzle, all right.
Copy !req
1287. You don't have any answers?
Copy !req
1288. No, not a one.
Copy !req
1289. Beats me.
Copy !req
1290. Well, thank goodness
I got the answer
Copy !req
1291. to the other thing
that was bothering me.
Copy !req
1292. What other thing?
Copy !req
1293. Well, sir, I know
you're expecting guests,
Copy !req
1294. so I don't want to
hold you up anymore.
Copy !req
1295. It's true, I do have to leave,
and I haven't got much time.
Copy !req
1296. But I am curious. Now, what?
Copy !req
1297. As long as
you're curious, sir.
Copy !req
1298. I figured out how Eddie Kane
got in here that night.
Copy !req
1299. Uh, he didn't use the key
that was removed
Copy !req
1300. from your car.
Copy !req
1301. Mallory had changed that lock,
Copy !req
1302. and, obviously,
he didn't use this key.
Copy !req
1303. The fact is,
he didn't use any key.
Copy !req
1304. Well,
how did he get in here then?
Copy !req
1305. He walked, the door was open.
Copy !req
1306. Oh, the door was open?
Copy !req
1307. Yes, sir.
Copy !req
1308. You see, the air conditioner
had broken down.
Copy !req
1309. That's why
that window was open.
Copy !req
1310. You can actually hear
the street noises on the tape.
Copy !req
1311. But, you know, an open window
on a muggy night's
Copy !req
1312. not much help.
Copy !req
1313. So I think Mr. Mallory
must've opened that door.
Copy !req
1314. That created a nice
cross breeze here.
Copy !req
1315. Now, when Mr. Kane arrived,
Copy !req
1316. well, the door was open,
he just walked in.
Copy !req
1317. Mr. Mallory must've
turned around
Copy !req
1318. and he shot him.
Copy !req
1319. All right. If that is true,
Copy !req
1320. and it sounds
conceivable enough to me,
Copy !req
1321. but I don't see
how that changes anything.
Copy !req
1322. About what, sir?
Copy !req
1323. About what happened.
Copy !req
1324. Now, look, Columbo,
I've had you up to here.
Copy !req
1325. And frankly, I'm not
interested in locks and keys
Copy !req
1326. and open doors
Copy !req
1327. and air conditioners,
and how he got in here.
Copy !req
1328. What the hell difference
does it make
how he got in here?
Copy !req
1329. The fact is that some crackpot
war veteran came in here,
Copy !req
1330. shot and killed Allen Mallory,
Copy !req
1331. and then frames me
out of some insane belief
Copy !req
1332. that Allen and I
stole his lousy little story.
Copy !req
1333. Now, that's all I know.
Copy !req
1334. And that's all
I'm interested in.
Copy !req
1335. Mr. Wolpert.
Copy !req
1336. I thought that name
might mean something.
Copy !req
1337. Let's see
if we're talking about
Copy !req
1338. the same Mr. Wolpert.
Copy !req
1339. We know you two fellows
know one another,
Copy !req
1340. so don't bother to hide it.
Copy !req
1341. No, you're wrong,
we don't know each other.
Copy !req
1342. This young man may have
seen me going—
Copy !req
1343. That's a lie.
Copy !req
1344. I resent that.
Copy !req
1345. Mr. Greenleaf,
Copy !req
1346. you told me that
you knew nothing
Copy !req
1347. about the contents of
Mr. Mallory's new novel.
Copy !req
1348. That's right, I don't.
Copy !req
1349. That's another lie.
Copy !req
1350. Thank you, Officer.
Copy !req
1351. Good evening, Norman.
Copy !req
1352. Good evening.
Copy !req
1353. I met this young man
the night of the murder.
Copy !req
1354. Works for
a manuscript service.
Copy !req
1355. Picks up
Mr. Mallory's tapes,
Copy !req
1356. takes them to his
company's office,
Copy !req
1357. the next day the typist
transcribes the tapes.
Copy !req
1358. Then he returns the tapes
and the typed pages.
Copy !req
1359. Except for the extra copy
Copy !req
1360. which he passed to you.
Copy !req
1361. Now, that's nothing
but assumption,
it's pure speculation.
Copy !req
1362. I've checked
your bank accounts,
Copy !req
1363. you made five
monthly cash deposits
Copy !req
1364. of $1,000 each.
Copy !req
1365. Now,
a court might want to know
Copy !req
1366. where you got that money
on your salary.
Copy !req
1367. You look at me.
Copy !req
1368. You don't have to
say anything.
Copy !req
1369. I'm not talking
about losing your job.
Copy !req
1370. I'm talking about murder.
Copy !req
1371. Don't you say a word.
I'll call my lawyer.
Copy !req
1372. He's involving you
in a murder.
Copy !req
1373. Was that part of the deal?
Copy !req
1374. Look, um,
I did get a set of the pages
Copy !req
1375. to Mr. Greenleaf.
Copy !req
1376. But I'm not
involved in any murder.
Copy !req
1377. I don't know a thing about
a murder.
Copy !req
1378. I believe you.
Copy !req
1379. Go on home now,
Copy !req
1380. we'll get your statement
later.
Copy !req
1381. Thank you. Go on.
Copy !req
1382. All right, Columbo.
Copy !req
1383. So he testifies that
he gave me those papers.
Copy !req
1384. What's that mean?
Copy !req
1385. It means you knew everything
that Mallory was writing.
Copy !req
1386. Day by day,
including the ending.
Copy !req
1387. Even if I knew the ending,
Copy !req
1388. that still doesn't mean
that I was the one
who murdered the man.
Copy !req
1389. For $100,000,
Copy !req
1390. you don't kill off
Rock Hudson.
Copy !req
1391. In this synopsis
that you gave me,
Copy !req
1392. which you claim Eddie Kane
wrote nine months ago,
Copy !req
1393. the hero saves his men,
Copy !req
1394. and he goes off
to live in a monastery.
Copy !req
1395. I hate to tell you this, sir,
Copy !req
1396. but there is no way
that Eddie Kane
Copy !req
1397. could've had that idea.
Copy !req
1398. It wasn't even
Allen Mallory's.
Copy !req
1399. It was given to him
by his agent, Miss McRae.
Copy !req
1400. And for the life of me,
Copy !req
1401. I cannot figure out
how Eddie Kane
Copy !req
1402. could have written an ending
nine months ago
Copy !req
1403. that was only invented
last week.
Copy !req
1404. I guess you see my point.
Copy !req