1. This place rules.
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2. Like they shoved a mountain
in a Home Depot.
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3. Oh yeah, bro. I can't wait
to grab some wall.
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4. What do you say, Pearle?
Wanna give it a shot?
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5. Hell no!
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6. I didn't survive 30 years
on the force
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7. to die
climbing a plastic rock.
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8. I'm gonna sit right here
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9. and watch people dangle
from they crotches.
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10. Now remember, we gotta make
the most of this free trial.
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11. We're gonna climb every wall
in the joint and then
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12. never... come... back.
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13. Hey, there, team!
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14. I'm Ty.
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15. Just wanted to give you
a big fat welcome
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16. before you
grab some wall.
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17. I-I-I like... to climb.
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18. Me too, brother.
Good luck up there!
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19. I'll be rootin' ya on
from up top.
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20. Hoo! Whoo!
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21. O-Okay.
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22. Time to show him
I am not just a pretty face.
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23. Ugh!
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24. Uh, Randy,
doesn't that seem
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25. a little dangerous
for a beginner?
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26. How else am I gonna charm a guy
in a climbing gym, Emily?
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27. God, listen to yourself.
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28. Hey, Ty!
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29. Huh?
Check this out!
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30. Whoops!
How did that get untied?
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31. Safety first, guys.
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32. Aaaah! Oh!
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33. Whaa! Aaaaaah!
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34. Hoo!
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35. Huh?
Hold the phone!
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36. Did you just free solo
- the Verte-
- Braeker?
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37. Um. Yeah!
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38. I'm kind of an expert,
uh, climbist?
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39. I'm the only other person
in the gym who's ever done that!
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40. I-I guess that means
we have to...
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41. go on a date. Heh!
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42. You just free soloed
the hardest section of the gym
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43. just to ask me out?
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44. Uh, pretty much.
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45. I love it!
It's a date.
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46. Here's my number. Ooh.
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47. Randy, you freakin' hunk,
you still got it.
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48. Aah!
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49. And like I said, this guy's
got a knife, and I'm cornered.
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50. So I just start doing
a bunch of karate kicks.
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51. Hyah! Hyah!
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52. Scared him so bad
he dropped the knife
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53. and ran straight
into a bush.
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54. Oh, my God. Hero!
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55. Also I had no idea possums
could hold knives.
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56. Uh, yeah, they can hold
pretty much anything.
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57. Being a building manager
sounds terrifying.
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58. And I attempted Akira!
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59. Shyeah! Tetsuoooo!
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60. No, Akira —
the climbing route.
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61. In France.
Oh. That Akira.
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62. Yeah, uh,
I did that one.
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63. You finished Akira?
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64. It's one of the hardest climbs
in the world!
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65. I... knew that?
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66. Whoa, baby!
Let's eat!
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67. Oh, um,
we didn't order this.
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68. I did!
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69. Grab a spoon!
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70. If we finish in under
30 minutes it's free.
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71. Aah!
What are we even doing?
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72. I haven't had lactose
in six years.
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73. YOLO!
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74. Ohhh, yeah.
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75. Love the feeling
of a giant, free
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76. frozen brick
in your stomach.
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77. Normally I'd say
doing an eating challenge
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78. on a first date
was a little unhinged,
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79. but you're just
so genuine.
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80. Ah, it's all part
of my ethos.
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81. Gotta live that
chillsplosion life.
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82. Chillsplosion?
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83. Yeah. You take things easy, relaxed,
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84. then do something crazy,
then go back to chillin'.
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85. You are absolute chaos!
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86. Um, what are you doing?
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87. Chillsploding!
Climb on up!
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88. You're a climber, right?
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89. Oh, uh, I don't know.
Like I always say,
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90. "Never climb anything
with a tum full of cream."
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91. Nah, you got this.
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92. Here, take my hand.
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93. Oh!
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94. Mm. Ah!
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95. Ah! I did it!
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96. Um, just like
I always do!
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97. Oh, wow.
Look at that.
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98. If you think this is good,
you should see the view
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99. from on top of
the Eagle Rock.
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100. What are you doing
next Saturday?
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101. Uh, that's usually crochet day
with my mom,
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102. but Lord knows
she's canceled on me enough.
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103. Well, then, you and I
are gonna free solo
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104. Eagle Rock and look out
at the perfect sunset.
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105. You're gonna love it.
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106. Um, could you call
the fire department?
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107. He's just incredible.
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108. Game for anything, positive.
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109. A frickin' hunk?
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110. So shallow, Emily.
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111. I'm not in it
for the looks,
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112. but, yes, he is a slab
of chiseled beef,
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113. in the spirit
and in the body.
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114. Sounds like things are off
to a great start.
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115. It's the first time
in forever
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116. I've felt an actual connection
with someone.
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117. I don't want to
screw it up,
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118. which is why
I can never tell him
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119. I'm not
an expert rock climber.
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120. Randy, you have to
come clean!
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121. Lies are the number-two thing
that ruin a relationship!
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122. What's number one?
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123. The 405.
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124. Look, it's not
a big deal.
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125. I mean, Bridgette and Alex
lie to each other all the time
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126. and they're still married.
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127. No, we aren't!
Oh, no!
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128. You two were
so good together.
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129. That's why you need to
tell Ty the truth.
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130. Stop trying to trap me!
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131. It's not like I'm gonna
have to keep lying.
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132. We're just gonna free solo
a little mountain together,
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133. and then I'm sure
we'll never do it again.
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134. Ugh, okay, fine!
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135. I'll stop lying...
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136. by getting so good
at climbing
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137. that everything I said
isn't a lie anymore.
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138. Happy now?
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139. So you must be Randy.
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140. What inspired you
to get into climbing?
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141. Oh, I told a guy I'm dating
I'm an expert climber,
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142. and I don't want him
to know I lied.
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143. That's like 90%
of our business, girl.
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144. We'll get you whipped
into shape in no time.
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145. Ugh!
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146. Aaaah!
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147. Aaah! Ooh.
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148. Aah!
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149. Wha-at! Aaah!
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150. Whoa! Ow.
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151. Honestly, Miss Randy,
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152. you're the worst climber
I've ever seen.
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153. I'm surprised you can
get into bed.
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154. Look, if you value your life,
you shouldn't go anywhere
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155. near a steep curb,
much less a cliff face.
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156. But I have to impress this guy
or he'll never be my boyfriend!
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157. Then tell him the truth.
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158. Now, sashay away.
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159. Uh, what?
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160. Get the hell
outta here!
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161. Psst. Hey. Buddy.
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162. Couldn't help but overhear
you're havin' a little trouble
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163. in the mountaineering department.
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164. Maybe I can interest you
in some, uh, safety measures?
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165. What is this?
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166. Inflatable crash pad.
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167. You fall, simply press
the red button, and poof.
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168. Surrounds you
in a protective shell.
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169. Guaranteed not to kill you,
or your money back.
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170. Money back.
And this really works?
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171. You tell me.
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172. If it's printed on the box,
it's got to be true.
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173. I'll take it!
Thanks, shadowy figure!
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174. Psst. Hey.
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175. You need
an immersion blender?
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176. Randy,
please don't do this.
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177. Yeah, can't you just tell Ty
that you're sick or something?
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178. Oh, so now
it's okay to lie?
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179. Wow, Bridgette.
You sound like Emily.
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180. Randy, I know I always told you
to follow your heart,
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181. but now I realize
that was stupid.
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182. Get your ass inside
before you die.
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183. Mom, come on, it's fine!
I've got it taken care of!
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184. Hey, Randy!
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185. Ready to climb the sheerest
cliff face in Los Angeles?
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186. You bet I am!
Huh!
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187. Mwah!
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188. Goodbye, Randy's beautiful
friends and family!
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189. And not for the last time,
either!
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190. Yeah!
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191. Whoo!
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192. Uh, whaaaaaaaa...
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193. Prepare for
the most romantic evening
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194. of your entire life.
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195. Uh, you know me —
always prepared.
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196. Then let's go!
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197. Chillsplosion!
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198. Okay.
No big deal.
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199. Lust got you to the top
of the first thing you climbed.
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200. It can do it again.
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201. Sorry if this one's
a little easy for you.
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202. Uh, whoo!
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203. Don't worry about it.
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204. Feels good to really
dominate an — oh, shit!
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205. Aaaaaah!
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206. Go, go!
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207. Stupid cheap last resort!
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208. Aaaaaah!
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209. Aaah! Oh!
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210. Randy!
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211. Aaaaah!
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212. Ah! Ugh!
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213. Oh, God, I should've
listened to my mom!
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214. Randy, please tell me
you're alive.
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215. Ty and I — ahh! Gah!
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216. Aaaaaah!
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217. What?
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218. Ty! Since we're doomed,
I have to say...
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219. I have no idea
how to climb!
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220. Yeah, I kinda
noticed that.
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221. I didn't want
to lie to you.
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222. I even went to another
climbing gym to try to learn.
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223. Randy, you didn't need to prove
anything to me as a climber.
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224. I was attracted to
your weirdo confidence.
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225. Plus, I rarely date
other climbers.
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226. They're too clingy.
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227. Okay, see, that —
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228. that's just funny.
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229. Aaah!
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230. Just let me go, Ty!
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231. Save yourself!
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232. Love another!
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233. No! We're gonna
get through this.
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234. Hold on, baby.
Mama's comin'!
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235. Your mom owns
a helicopter?
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236. It's just a loaner.
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237. Aw, yeah, Ma!
Whoo-hoo!
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238. Randy, don't...!
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239. Whoo! Whoo!
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240. Oh. Whoops.
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241. Aaaaaaah!
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242. Ah! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
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243. Ooh, gah, gah!
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244. Ooh. Aaaaah! Oof! Aah!
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245. Ahhh. Wahhh!
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246. I'm okay.
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247. Ty, I'm so sorry.
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248. Can we start over?
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249. Randy, I'd love to.
You're a great guy.
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250. Unfortunately, you went
to another climbing gym,
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251. and that's just more than I can
emotionally handle right now.
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252. Heh, heh, left, right, left.
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253. I hate to see him go,
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254. but I love
to watch him leave.
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