Clone High 1x9

Directed by Christopher Miller • Phil Lord • Ted Collyer • Harold Harris

Jack Black as Pusher / Larry Hardcore (voice) • Andy Dick as Van Gogh (voice) • Joe Flaherty as Abe’s Foster Dad (voice) • Donald Faison as Jimi Hendrix (voice) • Donald Faison as Wally (voice) • Donald Faison as Jimi Hendrix / Wally (voice) • Neil Flynn as Julius Caesar (voice)

The teens at Clone High begin smoking raisins, which sets them on a groovy, music-filled trip, so Principal Scudworth and the PTA develop a plan to fence in the students.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. Previously, on a very special Clone High...

2. This is a really long episode, so I'm gonna go fast.

3. Joan likes Abe. Abe's dating Cleo.

4. It's a crazy love triangle.

5. Let's start the show.

6. It all started when folks around here

7. noticed a storm was a-brewing.

8. Brr.

9. Storm's a-brewing.

10. Storm's a-brewing.

11. Storm's a-brewing...

12. in my heart.

13. Cleopatra.

14. I thought I told you—

15. Oh, spin the bottle.

16. Can I play?

17. Now, listen here.

18. I may be blind,

19. but don't worry about this storm, Joan of Arc.

20. I built this house like Noah built his ark:

21. ready for a flood.

22. Yep.

23. This house...

24. is flood-proof.

25. It's gone, Toots.

26. All gone.

27. What a terrible flood.

28. Holler when you see land, Joanie.

29. Holler when you see land.

30. Joan, are you okay?

31. We heard about your house burning down.

32. It's okay, Abe.

33. I don't need your pity.

34. Is it true you're living under the gym bleachers?

35. And I really don't need your pity.

36. So where do we put the canned goods?

37. 'Cause I brought you some beef broth.

38. It's still good, just dented.

39. I'm a vegetarian.

40. And here's a musty old Hypercolor shirt

41. I found in our dust rag drawer.

42. I know it's out of style,

43. but you poor people don't care about that sort of thing, right?

44. I'll can you good, I will.

45. Girls.

46. Girls, please.

47. You know how I feel about conflict.

48. I'm against it.

49. Now, I love you both.

50. One in a completely platonic way,

51. the other with a fiery passion

52. that most people know but once in a lifetime.

53. By the way, that one's not you, Joan.

54. It's Cleo.

55. Well, I'm glad we had this talk.

56. Now, let's never speak of this again.

57. Mail call.

58. Oh, calligraphy!

59. I've finally been invited

60. to the annual high society principal's ball.

61. This year, it's being held in the ballroom

62. at the local pie factory.

63. So much classier than the ballroom

64. at the seltzer factory.

65. Mr. Butlertron, I'd be honored if you'd be my plus one.

66. I'm walking on sunshine.

67. Whoa-whoa.

68. High society, here we come.

69. Welcome to the Grassy Knoll.

70. Try our new smoothie, the Jack Ruby red berry blast.

71. Sure.

72. Can I, err, uh...

73. add melons to that?

74. Melons.

75. And, uh...

76. coconuts?

77. Yeah!

78. Can I get yams?

79. Hey, find your own joke, shorty.

80. The booby bit is mine.

81. I would like to add some cans of milk.

82. Yeah!

83. And some jugs of cream.

84. That's it, pal.

85. You just ordered yourself up a knuckle sandwich.

86. Fight! Fight! Fight!

87. - Fight! Fight! - Oh, my God!

88. Fight!

89. Guys, guys, please!

90. I have the DNA of Abraham Lincoln.

91. Resolving disputes is in my nature.

92. Now, why don't we all take a deep breath.

93. How do you like that berry blast?

94. And by berry blast, I mean...

95. a blast to your berries.

96. Pun thief.

97. Huh.

98. Conflict mediation seminar, here I come.

99. I had a dream.

100. A dream we'd have ham and cheese sandwiches

101. for lunch.

102. But, Moses, you are shattering my dream.

103. But Martin Luther King, Jr.

104. You know I'm a Jew

105. and also lactose intolerant.

106. Freeze!

107. Now let's resolve this fight using conflict mediation.

108. Try passing this egg from one spoon to another

109. using only your mouths.

110. Wow.

111. I never saw it from that perspective before.

112. Me either.

113. I now realize I should be more tolerant of lactose.

114. Welcome home, Abe.

115. Welcome home.