1. We're so happy to have you here today!Copy !req
2. It's such an honor to have the Camp Critic Committee visit us again. You know, after last years incident.Copy !req
3. Which I really want to apologize for that again, and if you were wondering,Copy !req
4. yes, the camper did survive, physically speaking.Copy !req
5. But, a lot has changed since then!Copy !req
6. And I think that this year you will see that I am truly, without a doubt,Copy !req
7. the prime candidate for the "Camp Counselor of the Year Award"!Copy !req
8. Right, well we've got a big day of outdoor activities planned,Copy !req
9. but as you know the most important start of any day is a balanced breakfast!Copy !req
10. Yep, we run a tight ship around here, but
we also encourage freedom of expression.Copy !req
11. - Uh, David?
- Not now!Copy !req
12. Heh, sorry, this is one of our other counselors.Copy !req
13. She's got nothing to report, as always
because our camp is really great, as always.Copy !req
14. Have I mentioned how great our camp is?Copy !req
15. David!Copy !req
16. HAVE I MENTIONED HOW GREAT OUR CAMP IS?Copy !req
17. Now, we always make sure our daily activities test the bodies and minds of all of our campers,Copy !req
18. and today is no exception.Copy !req
19. Behold!Copy !req
20. Look, David-Copy !req
21. WHAT, Gwen! I have gone through a lot of planning and preparation to make this day happen.Copy !req
22. What could you possibly tell me that I don't already know?Copy !req
23. It's about to rain.Copy !req
24. nooo...Copy !req
25. 'Okay, what am I going to do? Think, think...'Copy !req
26. Yes, rain. Any camp's worst nightmare, but not here.Copy !req
27. You see, the plan all along was to make, uh...Copy !req
28. 'Okay, think David, think!
You can't have a repeat of last year.Copy !req
29. 'Poor, poor Chucky.
I hope his family got the flowers.Copy !req
30. 'I should send them an email.
But not now!Copy !req
31. 'Now I have to focus. What's an outside-of-the-box idea that's guaranteed not to go wrong?Copy !req
32. 'Aha!'Copy !req
33. was to make young Dolph here the counselor for the day! Isn't that right, Dolph?Copy !req
34. Who, me? Really?Copy !req
35. yeppers! I've always said, "what better way to
learn than to teach"?Copy !req
36. Dolph loves arts and crafts, and I'm sure he'll love teaching his fellow campers how to love them too.Copy !req
37. Thank you, Mr. David. Under my rule,Copy !req
38. I VILL MAKE CAMP CAMPBELL GREAT AGAIN!Copy !req
39. uhhehehehe...Copy !req
40. Come now mein friends,Copy !req
41. let us express ourselves through ze glory ofCopy !req
42. MACARONI ART!Copy !req
43. Man, this is lame. I miss Chucky.Copy !req
44. Yeah,Copy !req
45. and this macaroni sucks!Copy !req
46. Wanna go see how many pudding cups we can fit in our pockets?Copy !req
47. Oooh! Yeah!Copy !req
48. I think we can hit 20 this time!Copy !req
49. What d'you think, Neil?Copy !req
50. Wait, where's Neil?Copy !req
51. I don't know.Copy !req
52. But we need those pockets!Copy !req
53. They're deep.Copy !req
54. You lookin' for Neil?Copy !req
55. What do you know, Nurf?Copy !req
56. Nothin', I'd just like to be included for once.Copy !req
57. I feel like I'm always just in the background of your adventures.Copy !req
58. I mean, that's mainly because you bully kids constantly, Nurf.Copy !req
59. You're kind of an asshole.Copy !req
60. THAT'S NOT TRUE! I'LL KILL YOU!Copy !req
61. Sorry, sorry. I'm working on my issues.Copy !req
62. WHAT'D YOU DO WITH NEIL, NURF?Copy !req
63. SHOVE HIM IN A LOCKER?Copy !req
64. MAKE HIM PROM QUEEN, ONLY TO COVER HIM IN BLOOD?Copy !req
65. Back off!Copy !req
66. I only bully Neil Tuesdays, Thursdays, and non-denominational holidays.Copy !req
67. I understand he celebrates the Sabbath.Copy !req
68. Maybe he... vanished!Copy !req
69. OOF!Copy !req
70. Have you guys at least seen him?Copy !req
71. I saw him with the space kid this morning.Copy !req
72. Ehh... I guess we'll track him down.Copy !req
73. Ooh, a MYSTERY!Copy !req
74. A MURDER MYSTERY!Copy !req
75. Nope, just a normal one.Copy !req
76. Or is it...Copy !req
77. It is.Copy !req
78. Hmm... you seem pretty confident about that.Copy !req
79. WHERE WERE YOU ON THE NIGHT OF-Copy !req
80. Shut up, let's go find him.Copy !req
81. MYSTERY TIME!Copy !req
82. Tsk tsk tsk...Copy !req
83. You see, I feel that letting the campers take over gives them a sense of pride and purpose,Copy !req
84. that you just don't get with those other 'traditional' camps.Copy !req
85. I've...Copy !req
86. Oh, uh, yes Dolph?Copy !req
87. How can I help YOU?Copy !req
88. Vhere are your papers?Copy !req
89. Uh, I'm not quite sure what you mean.Copy !req
90. Your papers, vhere are zhey?Copy !req
91. It's a very simple question, David.Copy !req
92. You are only hurting yourself by lying.Copy !req
93. Oh.Copy !req
94. Oh, you want more construction paper!Copy !req
95. Ja, vhat did you zhink I meant?Copy !req
96. I'm not some sort of secret police or something.Copy !req
97. So, Space Kid, you like science and shit, right?Copy !req
98. Uhhhh... y-yeah?Copy !req
99. See my partner, she's what we call a hothead.Copy !req
100. Now she thinks you murdered Neil to
get his science supplies.Copy !req
101. What? No, no, I didn't...Copy !req
102. LIAR!Copy !req
103. Ask him about his albino!Copy !req
104. - You mean his alibi?
- That too!Copy !req
105. Uhh... Nikki, he can see you.Copy !req
106. AAARGH!Copy !req
107. Where is he, huh! Did you eat him? BARF HIM UP!Copy !req
108. No, please, no!Copy !req
109. The last time I saw him, he was with Dolph!Copy !req
110. Vat is zis! You must color inside ze line!Copy !req
111. I do not approve of mixing colors!Copy !req
112. That's unsettling.Copy !req
113. Uhhehehehe...Copy !req
114. Uhmmhhh...Copy !req
115. ULGHHH...Copy !req
116. Where's Neil? What did you do with him?Copy !req
117. You must not speak to me this vay!Copy !req
118. Respect ze armband!Copy !req
119. Unhughhh!Copy !req
120. All right kiddos, why don't we take this conversation somewhere else,Copy !req
121. like another room! Or another camp!Copy !req
122. Remember your place David! I am in charge today.Copy !req
123. Uhhhh...Copy !req
124. Now vhat seems to be ze problem?
Zhere is a missing child?Copy !req
125. What! No-o-o, I'm sure this is just a misunderstanding.Copy !req
126. Missing is such a strong word, I'm sure Neil is just...Copy !req
127. hiding!Copy !req
128. David, I swear to God, if you lost-Copy !req
129. - BECAUSE WE ARE PLAYING HIDE AND SEEK!Copy !req
130. Somevun is hiding from art's divine presence?Copy !req
131. Unacceptable!Copy !req
132. Ve shall make an example of him!
Let the hunt begin!Copy !req
133. 'This is still fine.'Copy !req
134. Alright, I've given you each a unique number.Copy !req
135. Now write it on your arm so we don't lose anyvun else.Copy !req
136. Ooh! I'll be a bloodhound!Copy !req
137. Bark-bark-bark-bark!
Sniff! Sniff! Sniff-sniff-sniff!Copy !req
138. Let's search the floorboards!Copy !req
139. Yeah!Copy !req
140. This has escalated quickly.Copy !req
141. You cannot hide from us, Neil!Copy !req
142. Sniff! Sniff-sniff-sniff! Ooh!Copy !req
143. Quick, someone open the pantry!Copy !req
144. What is it girl? Is he in here?Copy !req
145. I think so!Copy !req
146. Not really. I just want a snack.Copy !req
147. Aha! I knew it would be in here.Copy !req
148. Oh snap, did someone get murdered?Copy !req
149. This is horrible.Copy !req
150. There goes my award!Copy !req
151. Uh, more tent for me.Copy !req
152. What are you guys looking at?Copy !req
153. Neil, he lives!Copy !req
154. Just as I knew the entire time.Copy !req
155. Mystery solved.Copy !req
156. Mystery? I was just hanging out in the attic
with the crackers and juiceCopy !req
157. Oh, my shoe.Copy !req
158. Ze attic, of course! Amongst the juice! So crafty.Copy !req
159. Wait, why were you in the attic?Copy !req
160. Oh, I was just writing in, you know, my diary.Copy !req
161. You write in a diary?Copy !req
162. NERD!Copy !req
163. aaand this is why I write in the attic.Copy !req
164. Oh, this is a disaster!Copy !req
165. Good thing none of this matters.Copy !req
166. "For finding ze missing camper, ve name
you ze camp counselor of ze year."Copy !req
167. My goodness, zis is ze happiest day of
mein life!Copy !req
168. High five! High five! High five! High five!Copy !req
169. (I can't believe I lost to Dolph.
He isn't even a counselor!)Copy !req
170. (Plus he really looks like Hitler.)Copy !req
171. "Rain Rain" by Richie Branson, Solar SlimCopy !req